13. Real Talkļ¼ Don't Accept Yourself, It's A Trap
Episode Stats
Harmful content
Misogyny
2
sentences flagged
Hate speech
17
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Summary
In this episode, Andy Frisella talks about the dangers of false victimhood and how it prevents us from finding the path to being a better version of ourselves. He also explains why it s important to stop buying into the false victimization mentality and the false ideas that keep us stuck in the old ways of thinking.
Transcript
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told my teacher dumb bitch i'm gonna get millions watch this in the project living
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spoke it till existence mold changed to 50 got mold cost than did it i only weigh 180 but my
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watch cost 250 what's up guys andy frisella here and this is the show for the realists say goodbye
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to the lies the fakeness and delusions of modern society and welcome to motherfucking reality guys
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look we're gonna have a short real talk today but it's important okay because this episode
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could save your entire life a lot of people who don't understand the concept of what i'm going to
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talk about right now they are going to ruin their entire lives so pay attention and think about what
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i'm talking about the purpose of this episode man it really comes to me from my heart this is
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something i believe in it's something i'm passionate about it's something i talk about often and it's
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something that's important for you guys to understand when we look around at every single
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person just about every single one that we see online every single post notice how much false
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victimhood is going on false ideas going on like people are some sort of victims of society of
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oppression of biases and the truth is the only thing these people are victims of is their own weak-ass
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thoughts and unwillingness to do the work that's the truth but why isn't it being told everywhere we
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look right now we see everybody talking about kindness the problem is most of these people
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don't even understand what true kindness is they think kindness equals being nice and not challenging
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people and being polite and fluffy and dude there's a time to be nice and there's a time to be fluffy
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and there's a time to be courteous but when you're talking about helping people and you're talking about
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improving and you're talking about having a better life that is not kindness okay all successful people
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in the history of the fucking earth know that that is not the definition of kindness kindness is telling
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people the truth when people are told the truth they have the ability to change their actions when you
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get to change your actions you have the ability to produce a different and better result instead of that
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kind of kindness we have so many people out there in society talking about how bad they have it and
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all these so-called spiritual gurus are just reinforcing this notion of victimhood you look around dude look at
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what they say the gurus are all saying the same shit however you act whatever you do no matter what's
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screwed up about you no matter what's going on in your life and no matter how much money you make
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you should feel amazing about yourself you should be happy with who you are is that really kindness
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really i don't think so it's not telling people the truth it's telling people to embrace mediocrity
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and that isn't kind no matter how much fluff you want to put around it the moment it feels good for you to
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accept mediocrity is the moment you have zero chance of improving as a person if you decide
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that mediocrity is how you're going to accept yourself i can promise you most of your life
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is going to always look half-ass okay if you accept mediocrity you are never going to challenge yourself
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to try anything outside of your comfort zone that means you actually will never grow as well
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accomplishing hard things is how we feel great about ourselves so if you tell people things that
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keep them from discovering the path to being better guess what that's not kindness successful people
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guys understand this as truth they live by this law they understand it's not kind to unconditionally
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accept our own mediocrity they also understand how dangerous it is the reason it's dangerous is this
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if you buy into this mentality of false victimhood and you start to think you can solve your problems
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with affirmations and quote-unquote acceptance and all these other things that we see everywhere we look
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right now nothing is ever going to change ever yeah man i wish it were different i really do wish it
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were different i wish it were easy to change and improve but guess what it's fucking not all right
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and what's scary is that too many people out there are telling you otherwise everywhere you look you have
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people telling you to accept yourself and everything in your life the way it is they're saying you're worth
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it and you are enough and they are basically reinforcing everybody staying exactly where they are and
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these people are not doing the hard work to improve and that hard work is what leads to happiness
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so like i said this is not kindness dude when i was 350 fucking pounds if i looked in the mirror and
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said to myself andy you look good you should feel great about yourself that's a lie because the truth
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is i ate like shit for years before that and i fell off all the good habits but if i looked at myself
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what i did and i said hey bro i love you but man you look like shit and you've been off your game
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and it's time to get your shit together that's telling myself the truth that's being kind to myself
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that's the kind of message that is going to help me improve and change it's the kind of message that's
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going to help everyone change and be happy including you but we don't have that right now anywhere that i
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can see why aren't we out there encouraging people to be kind to themselves by giving themselves the
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unbiased truth about the situation how hard is it to look yourself in the mirror and tell yourself
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the fucking truth yeah dude sometimes it's really really hard sometimes it does make you feel really
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bad but wouldn't you rather feel like shit for five minutes and then craft a plan to actually fix
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the problem wouldn't that feel better than telling yourself a bunch of feel-good nonsense up front
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and then still having the same problems you have right now a year from now when you look at your
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body the reason you don't like your body is because you haven't earned the right to feel good about your
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body when you look at your bank account and it's less than what you think it should be the reason it's
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less than what you think it should be isn't because someone's screwing you it's because you haven't done
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the work required to have a different fucking number there it's that simple you know that's the truth
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the reason your life isn't where you want it to be mentally physically spiritually and financially is
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because you're not buying into the concept of having to earn things and let me tell you something
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earning happiness is a requirement as well a lot of you are probably sitting there right now and you're
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rolling your eyes you're saying oh you know what i just want to be happy and you think that's enough
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but the truth is guys and this is the secret happiness is earned just like earning the right
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to feel good about your body just like earning everything else in your life the reason you don't
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have happiness is because you haven't been disciplined in the rest of your life you haven't paid the price
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to look yourself in the mirror and say hey man i'm fucking proud of you when you don't pay that price
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you don't get the prize of happiness this is very simple a lot of people will say that everybody
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deserves to be happy you know what i don't buy into that shit if you're sitting on the couch and you're
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living a life less than what it could be you do not deserve to be happy that is not how the world works
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you were put here to go on a journey and that journey is the fulfillment of your own true potential
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and when you don't even attempt to fulfill that potential you're not going to be happy ever if you
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are aware of the purpose of this journey if you are listening to this right now if you have any ambition
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whatsoever to be better and you don't pursue that ambition you are going to be unhappy yes there's lots
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of people who could be happy not pursuing that journey i mean look around dude do we know people
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who are happy with much less and that we would say live a more average life so to speak yeah people
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who might not be in perfect shape happy people who might not be making a ton of money happy people who
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might not have the best family situation happy yes those people seem to be happy but there's more to it
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that you have to understand okay understand that the reason that those people can feel that way
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isn't because of the way they're living it's because they aren't aware of what their life could be
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and guess what by default because you're listening to this show you probably are or you wouldn't be
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listening you'd be out there listening to the kardashians okay so instead of whining and pouting and
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crying and bitching about everything you don't like instead of complaining about how things should
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be i think it would serve you guys better to actually invest in yourself to actually put in the work
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to actually stop and say what is the truth about myself the truth is i haven't been doing what i need
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to do the truth is i could do a better job the truth is it's not everybody else's fault when you start
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to tell yourself the truth about these things you end up in a scenario where you're in control
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so that feeling you know that we all have on the inside of being out of control that goes away when
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you start to accept responsibility for your own actions instead of writing another fucking quote
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unquote vulnerable post that's completely self-driven that is being truly kind to yourself that is when things
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will begin to change and that is when you're going to start to earn the right to be happy
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you want another example of mediocrity being shoved down everybody's throats look around at the political
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as right now and everybody criticizing these people for being wealthy which that's fine if you don't like
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the fact they're wealthy that's okay but when did becoming financially successful in life and becoming
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that kind of a person a person with means become a bad thing why are we criticizing people for doing things
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that we weren't willing to do and that they got paid for now i get it dude politics maybe it's a bad
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example the truth is i think they're all shit bags anyway but when you vilify success don't expect the
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universe to deliver it to you you're going to end up with nothing because that's not the way the universe works
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so before you buy into this idea of the whole entire world and the universe needing to change
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for you let me save you your entire fucking lifetime and remind you that it's not going to happen what
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is going to happen is you're going to spend your entire life talking about loving yourself and being
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kind and accepting yourself and none of it's going to be true then your time on earth is going to end and
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you're gonna feel like shit that's something you should probably think about and honestly you should
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probably be worried about while you're sitting there worrying about this a lot of us we're going
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to continue to work to be better we're going to put in the work on our bodies we're going to put in
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the work on our finances in our business we're going to put in the work to become better families we're
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going to put in the work to understand the universe and god better we're going to put in the work to be
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better fucking people and guess what's going to happen because of that all of those things this is a
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universal truth of the world that has gotten lost in society when you put in the input you get the output
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okay if you've been putting in the inputs and you haven't got the result yet the only things that could
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be wrong is that you're putting in the wrong input or you haven't been doing it long enough that's it
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so while the whole world decides to sell mediocrity and jam it down our throats I think it would be
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wise for all of us to stop and say what do I really want do I want to live a life of false victimhood
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complaining all the time pouting all the time whining all the time and never changing ever I don't think
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anybody wants that guys listen the bottom line here is this kindness is unbiased truth get that
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through your fucking heads someone who tells you the truth about a situation is a million times more
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valuable than the person who pacifies your inner desires that don't jive with the reality of how life
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works so you have to make a decision fake kindness lies pacifying mediocrity or real kindness truth
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that eventually result in happiness when you combine them with action these are your only two options and
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guys let me tell you I would choose wisely because whether you agree right now or you don't there is
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going to come a time in your life when you realize that this is the truth and I hope that time comes
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before it's too late told my teacher dumb bitch I'm gonna get millions watch this in the project
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living down spoke it till existence while I'm from where you can't trust so welcome