REAL AF with Andy Frisella - April 23, 2020


25. Mental Toughness Is Not Optional

Hosted by
Andy Frisella
Mentioned
Andy Frisilla
24. Hashtag Fail 26. Real Talk： How Big Are Your Dreams？

Episode Stats


Length

24 minutes

Words per minute

158.55

Word count

3,926

Sentence count

—

Harmful content

Misogyny

3

sentences flagged

Toxicity

84

sentences flagged

Hate speech

35

sentences flagged


Summary

Summaries generated with gmurro/bart-large-finetuned-filtered-spotify-podcast-summ .

In this episode of The Realists, I discuss the coronavirus pandemic and how people are reacting to it. I also talk about the self-development crisis in America and how it s affecting our mental toughness.

Transcript

Transcript generated with Whisper (turbo).
Misogyny classifications generated with MilaNLProc/bert-base-uncased-ear-misogyny .
Toxicity classifications generated with s-nlp/roberta_toxicity_classifier .
Hate speech classifications generated with facebook/roberta-hate-speech-dynabench-r4-target .
Hosts, guests, and mentioned names generated with spaCy (en_core_web_sm), reconciled against Wikidata.
00:00:00.000 told my teacher dumb bitch i'm gonna get millions watch this in the project living 1.00
00:00:04.680 spoke it till existence mold changed to 50 got mold cost than did it i only weigh 180 but my 0.99
00:00:11.520 watch cost 250 what's up guys this is andy frisella and this is the show for the realists
00:00:17.500 say goodbye to the lies the fakeness and delusions of modern society and right now there's a ton of 0.92
00:00:23.080 and welcome to motherfucking reality guys i have a whole lot i want to talk about today it's going 0.94
00:00:30.400 to be a very uh important show before i get to the important part of the show i'm going to get to the 0.95
00:00:36.280 most important part of the show which is the housekeeping section the housekeeping section
00:00:43.760 is where i remind you that we are here to serve and we grow our show completely off of your word
00:00:52.260 of mouth and your shares and your subscriptions and your reviews unlike a lot of other podcasts
00:00:59.660 out there we do not run 20 minutes of ads before you get into the content nor do we run any ads
00:01:06.520 all we ask is that you pay the fee and grow the show all right that's it so if you haven't subscribed
00:01:15.720 please subscribe if you haven't left us a review please leave us a review if you haven't told your
00:01:22.240 friends about it please tell them about it this is how we grow this is how we get our message out
00:01:27.840 a lot of you guys are messaging me consistently and saying hey man i love your message i love what
00:01:33.260 you guys do you're breaking down barriers you're making things uh how we feel they should be again
00:01:39.460 and more people need to hear this well if more people need to hear this then i ask that you share it
00:01:46.020 because i can't make more people hear it i need you to do it for us so that's the fee if you could pay
00:01:52.800 the fee and that goes for every show guys if you like an episode i ask that you leave a review or that
00:01:59.220 you you know that you tell people about or subscribe and do that for the episodes not the whole you know
00:02:04.720 one time ever that's dude we pour a lot into this man these guys they have full-time jobs just to
00:02:10.120 produce this show and uh you know we want to get the message out there so you guys are been amazing
00:02:15.820 about this and so i'm not like trying to say you aren't doing a good job i'm just asking let's step
00:02:20.560 it up a little bit you know right now we're in a time of uncertainty where people need some leadership 0.94
00:02:25.640 and they also need some laughs and they need some things to think about other than this fucking 0.97
00:02:29.680 coronavirus let's be honest so uh do us a solid share the show anyway that was housekeeping now
00:02:38.280 for the main event guys the truth is uh you know i haven't said much on social media recently
00:02:47.680 because i'm pouring more into the podcast i've realized um that i enjoy doing this i enjoy doing
00:02:54.660 the podcast because uh it allows me to say what i want to say in just a more transparent unfiltered
00:03:02.720 manner and with more context and so i've been very quiet on social media other than me pointing out
00:03:09.620 exactly what was happening on literally the very first day this was happening uh and and i was right
00:03:15.820 what i said what happened has happened and i'm going to remind everybody of that until the day i die
00:03:21.180 because i got blasted pretty hard for it but that's neither here nor there what i'm getting at
00:03:28.960 is that you know i've been thinking for the last 10 or 12 years we've had a pretty stable situation
00:03:41.020 in america for sure and sometimes the world and if you're old enough and not all of you are
00:03:49.260 you can remember other things that have happened before and the 2008 economic crash
00:03:55.380 um you know if you're a little older than 1980s inflation if you're a little older than that
00:04:01.060 uh like vaughn you probably remember the 1970s energy crisis right we've been through a lot as
00:04:07.700 as a country okay but not recently they're not the last 10 or 12 years we've had it pretty good
00:04:13.800 and that's showing and how people are reacting to this whole scenario of this virus and this pandemic
00:04:21.660 and to be honest it's pretty disappointing from my point of view and so i want to get into that
00:04:27.300 and talk about something that's related to that topic you know the self-development narrative
00:04:32.780 for the last decade or so which you hear me sarcastically criticize a lot
00:04:38.580 has said the same things over and over again i feel like it's like 0.99
00:04:43.240 the people who don't have shit to say are just saying the same shit that other people are saying 0.99
00:04:48.660 they're telling you to meditate they're saying be kind they're giving you these positive sayings that 0.99
00:04:54.860 you know if you really break them down they're meaningless okay and there's nothing wrong with that
00:05:00.180 i don't think being positive is wrong if it's what you enjoy and the content you like to consume
00:05:07.240 perfect but getting through hard times like this takes more than that a lot more
00:05:15.800 it requires mental toughness which isn't popular to talk about because some people think that if you
00:05:24.540 are to have mental toughness it means that you're cold it means that you're calloused it means that
00:05:31.080 you know you're not a nice person it doesn't come across as something that people aspire to be
00:05:37.160 because they feel like they have to trade their goodness to become tough and you don't okay
00:05:44.380 mother teresa was one of the toughest people on the planet jesus is one of the toughest people that
00:05:51.480 ever lived all right and you have to start thinking about mental toughness like that it doesn't mean
00:05:58.140 you're sacrificing your goodness to become some hardened cynical or uncaring human it means you keep it
00:06:06.020 real and you do the right thing no matter what it is that you said you're going to do and on top of
00:06:12.800 doing the right thing it means that you follow through on what you say you're going to do
00:06:19.540 regardless of what the circumstances are right now we have this virus and we have all these reasons to
00:06:28.400 not do anything we're being told to stay home we're being told by the media as i addressed in a
00:06:35.260 previous episode to recover and heal and don't get too ambitious during this time because that could
00:06:44.100 really fuck you up right that's the world that we live in but guys i would like you to consider 0.91
00:06:52.160 something i would like you to consider this being mentally tough becoming mentally tough is not optional 0.99
00:07:03.500 to you having a successful a happy and a fulfilling life there are constantly going to be things that
00:07:13.900 come across your presence and your perspective that are going to literally fuck up your entire world and 0.76
00:07:22.340 if you can't handle those things you are going to live a life of ups and downs and chaos and feel
00:07:28.660 completely out of control all the time mental toughness is not optional and this crisis has
00:07:37.340 brought this to the forefront we can show you right now why mentally tough people are excelling and why
00:07:46.500 not only are they excelling but why it's the right thing to do all right people around you they
00:07:53.140 desperately need you to step up and be a leader your family your co-workers your bosses even the people
00:08:00.420 above and below you are hungry for leadership okay right now we live in a world where everybody plays
00:08:09.500 business that means they go out they get a business card they get a title they want to be a ceo and
00:08:16.380 you know when things are good that's fine you can play business but the truth is is that in a crisis
00:08:23.460 in times of uncertainty in times of pain in times of frustration in times of anger are the times that 0.99
00:08:31.820 you literally prove whether you're an actual ceo or whether you're a fucking clown that's the truth 0.99
00:08:40.200 if you only lead during good times you're essentially a worthless leader leadership is much more 0.99
00:08:48.840 important in times like this than it is when times are good all right and this positivity that the people
00:08:56.820 need right now is not the sweet syrupy fluffy care bear positivity it's the strong positivity it's the
00:09:06.980 tough positivity okay one of the things about this crisis that's so great is that it's waking people
00:09:14.620 up that life is not a playground it is not this idealistic playhouse that we all live in it's a 0.86
00:09:23.320 fucking battleground and if you don't have a mentally tough perspective about going to battle every single 0.98
00:09:31.660 day and winning these little wars that are your days you are going to have trouble dealing with 0.99
00:09:38.960 crisis situations all right leadership has to be strong leadership is the right thing leadership is
00:09:49.420 what we need and leadership is not you are enough that's not what it is okay you're not going to inspire 0.93
00:09:57.060 anybody with self-care bath bombs and fucking positive affirmations in the morning positivity is a great 0.94
00:10:04.700 thing but right now in times of frustration in times of stress you have to show people through your 0.98
00:10:13.140 actions what it looks like to be gritty and self-reliant and someone who takes care of business no matter
00:10:21.220 what the fuck is going on okay you've got to show some confidence you've got to show some swag you've 0.97
00:10:28.180 got to show that you are a fucking badass who's not going to let situations crumble you and by doing so 0.99
00:10:35.200 you now have a scenario where other people are looking to you and they're feeling hopeful all right 0.97
00:10:41.940 people right now i've heard it they're talking about trump and they're saying oh well you know he hasn't 0.98
00:10:47.040 been empathetic enough is that really what the fuck you want like are we being real do you really want 0.99
00:10:52.840 someone up there who's crying and saying oh i'm i'm so upset about this whole scenario this is fucking 0.99
00:10:58.880 terrible or do you want someone that says hey you know what this fucking sucks but you know we got this 1.00
00:11:05.020 we have a plan we're going to execute the plan we're americans fuck the virus and fuck anybody else who 1.00
00:11:11.800 stands in the way of us getting better we're going to do our business and we're going to what do you want 1.00
00:11:16.280 okay what do you want because i'm going to tell you all day i want the fucking second guy i want the 1.00
00:11:23.380 guy who's going to stand up and say hey motherfuckers we're going to fucking push through this that's what 0.99
00:11:28.360 you want too you may not like trump you may not like whatever's going on but you will like good 1.00
00:11:35.360 leadership and being a good leader is reinforcing things in times of crisis and saying hey motherfuckers 0.99
00:11:41.280 we're going to push through and we're not going to push through with feel-good bullshit we're going to push 0.99
00:11:45.420 through with our elbow grease our grit our determination our toughness and we're going to 1.00
00:11:50.300 make this shit happen that's the kind of leadership that's needed in crisis not this coddling fucking 1.00
00:11:57.540 poor me shit that we're seeing everywhere okay mental toughness is needed to impose a sense of order 1.00
00:12:05.060 and certainty that the society needs and not just society as in everybody your fucking society your 1.00
00:12:14.360 community this crisis has no doubt created a lot of chaos for a lot of people and when chaos hits 0.97
00:12:21.820 average people panic average people want a greater sense of order and certainty they want a greater sense
00:12:30.160 of security that's why people right now are susceptible to governments becoming tyrannical and we hear this
00:12:38.020 all on the news right now people are talking about how the government's overstepping their bounds
00:12:42.440 how people shouldn't be forced to do x y and z and you know what the constitution of america backs those
00:12:49.140 complaints it just does but the reason this is happening is because people want certainty and
00:12:56.300 security so fucking bad and they're not willing to step up with the toughness they need to provide
00:13:02.640 the sense of order and certainty that we should have in our communities and in our direct ecosystems 0.96
00:13:08.820 that's our job that's our job that's the job of the people it's the job of each and every one of us
00:13:15.140 to become mentally tough that doesn't mean you were born mentally tough that means you can become
00:13:23.080 mentally tough and it's our job to take control of our lives and show the next generation and the
00:13:32.100 people that are coming behind us what grit and confidence and perseverance looks like through 0.78
00:13:40.340 our actions not a bunch of whiny cry fear and panicking bullshit we are failing and upholding our 0.63
00:13:50.220 obligation to the people that look at us right now as a society that's a fact all right if you want to 0.99
00:13:57.260 look at every leader through the history of time every fucking leader every king every queen every 0.95
00:14:04.680 president every general every famous movement every single thing all of them all of them from trump 1.00
00:14:13.840 to jesus from fucking hitler to fucking mother teresa all of them no matter what their causes are 0.99
00:14:21.620 we can argue the causes all day no matter what their causes are they aren't passive they take control 0.99
00:14:30.540 this is how things happen and it's our job to make the right things happen you want to help stop the
00:14:38.240 spread of the panic stop quoting self-care memes and step the fuck up and do everything that you need to 0.54
00:14:44.480 do stop sitting there and waiting for someone to come fix your problem stop sitting there 0.99
00:14:50.920 complaining about shit that you can't do anything about and start working on developing and becoming 0.97
00:14:58.360 someone who can handle crisis and set an example for the people that are going to come after you 0.99
00:15:06.000 and i know this is a hard concept to understand because all of us think fuck people look at me as a
00:15:14.040 leader that's kind of weird we all feel that way but the truth is you all lead people all of you you
00:15:23.200 might lead one person or you might lead a hundred people or you might lead thousands of people but you
00:15:29.080 all have influence and by succumbing to this weak mentality of the sheep herd you are failing your
00:15:37.500 obligation to the people that look up to you ultimately guys mental toughness during this time means
00:15:45.900 winning every single day of this pandemic it means that what you do during this quarantine is exactly what
00:15:54.760 you would do any other normal day of your life while everyone else is panicking you have to stay
00:16:01.740 productive while there's chaos all around you you still have to uphold your obligation to yourself
00:16:09.180 and your family and everybody else that depends on you including the goals you set for yourself
00:16:15.420 you still have to wake up every day and think about what kind of life do you want what goals do you set
00:16:23.820 for yourself what goals do you have for your family what goals do you have for your career
00:16:29.200 lots of people have let themselves off the hook right now because they don't have to go into work
00:16:35.980 so are you like this or are you one of the people who's still taking the time to dream and think and
00:16:44.320 visualize and focus every single day it's a rhetorical question I want you to think about it
00:16:50.700 you have to still wake up every day and cultivate a sense of gratitude you think this crisis means you 0.99
00:16:57.620 don't have things to be thankful for you're stuck at home but guess what at least you have a fucking 0.97
00:17:03.780 home most of you aren't totally alone you got people in your house you have more time on your 0.99
00:17:09.960 hands that's a fucking gift you need to continue to create positive energy during this crisis through 0.88
00:17:16.600 your actions and you do that by exercising your gratitude every single day just as if it were a 0.99
00:17:23.740 normal day that's going to help build your mental toughness you still have to identify the critical
00:17:30.900 tasks that are going to move you forward on these visualizations and goals okay the key to success 0.74
00:17:37.600 doesn't change just because we're in a fucking crisis completing critical tasks leads to the happiness 0.83
00:17:43.900 the fulfillment and the success that's going to contribute to your confidence which is going to 0.96
00:17:48.820 help you become more mentally tough I've told you guys about the power list literally for years it's
00:17:55.580 episode 107 of the MFCEO project it's in this feed go back and listen to it and listen to how to use it
00:18:02.380 specifically don't become like one of these people who hears half of it and does it half-assed
00:18:09.460 and then you know wonders why it doesn't work you got to do it exactly as it says don't let your ego 0.92
00:18:16.580 take control of your fucking actions and start thinking that you're even in a place to customize 0.98
00:18:21.740 a tool like this okay do it as it says and you're going to start to see the benefits all right so why 0.99
00:18:30.700 is this so important to think about right now why is it important to cultivate mental toughness during
00:18:37.900 this pandemic it's because ultimately guys it's what's going to bring this situation to a point where it's not
00:18:45.520 only better for you but it actually has made you happier the reality is people set goals and dreams
00:18:52.280 when things are good when things are pleasant when everything's okay that's when people do all these 1.00
00:18:58.140 things we're talking about but when things get hard and scary they fucking throw that shit out the window 0.99
00:19:03.260 and start thinking about what's on Fox News or CNN and when they do this they realize they were actually 0.99
00:19:10.840 lying to themselves in the first place because their actions are not backing up the promises they
00:19:15.780 made to themselves so then they lose self-respect they lose self-esteem they lose momentum they lose
00:19:22.120 confidence they lose belief in themselves and you can't be happy when you don't believe in yourself
00:19:28.280 when you don't respect yourself this pandemic is the perfect time to prove when you make promises to
00:19:35.560 yourself you keep them no matter what it's the perfect time to say I'm not going to let any of this
00:19:44.000 unforeseen bullshit factors derail my goals and dreams I'm going to continue to work and I'm going to follow
00:19:50.620 through on what I want and when you do that you begin to create the framework of mental toughness you
00:19:57.680 create grit you create fortitude you create determination you create self-belief you create 0.98
00:20:05.220 confidence and what that ultimately does guys is it makes you feel like a fucking badass and guess 0.86
00:20:11.800 what happens you earn happiness you earn fulfillment as a result of keeping the promises you make to 0.82
00:20:23.180 yourself if you can learn this and you can be happy during this coronavirus pandemic you can find happiness
00:20:31.520 at any time in your life and that's something I think that you guys should all stop and really think
00:20:38.120 about how much of your life how much of your happiness how much of your fulfillment is dictated
00:20:45.800 by circumstantial situations that you have zero control over listen I know that most of us weren't ready
00:20:55.420 for a crisis like this but the truth is nobody could have expected it and anybody who says 0.97
00:21:01.340 they expected they're probably in on selling the motherfucking vaccine okay let's be real but when 0.96
00:21:07.520 you actively cultivate mental toughness in life it prepares you for these ups and downs the good times 0.97
00:21:14.640 and the bad okay you need to use this time to go hard after mental toughness if you do that on some
00:21:22.240 level you'll be ready for anything the rest of your life you guys should be looking at this just like
00:21:27.980 you would look at your career just like you would look at your spirituality just like you would look
00:21:33.240 at your fitness you should look at your mental toughness the same and dedicate time every day
00:21:38.860 to build this quality that is going to fulfill you and create situations for you to actually be happy 0.98
00:21:47.260 whether life is clear and fucking blue skies and clear sailing or there's a fucking hurricane going on 0.98
00:21:55.120 in society everywhere you look it shouldn't matter your happiness your discipline your mental toughness 0.98
00:22:03.540 is dependent on you and what you do and how you keep your word to yourself practice that on a daily
00:22:12.140 basis and you're going to see your life improve in many many different ways all right this crisis guys 0.76
00:22:20.040 it's a fucking test man it is a huge test there is a bunch of people out there right now that are 0.99
00:22:27.240 going to look back at this crisis and say fuck you know what my life was going great i had everything 0.99
00:22:34.160 going and then the coronavirus came along and it just ruined my life okay that's going to be a lot of 0.99
00:22:42.040 people okay so you're going to be one of those people you're going to be one of those people who's
00:22:45.540 passive one of those people who gives into the circumstantial forces around you and just molds
00:22:50.620 and bends their life to fit that circumstance or are you going to be one of the people who is active
00:22:58.220 who's aggressive who takes control who does what they can do and what they have to do to set a great
00:23:05.780 example not just for themselves but for their families their friends their communities their employees
00:23:13.000 their bosses and literally everybody that has a 360 connection to you okay those are your choices 1.00
00:23:20.100 and i'm going to tell you right now if you're the kind of person who can stop right now and say fuck 0.99
00:23:28.240 my life is a shit show but what i'm going to do is i'm going to control the things i can control i'm 0.99
00:23:36.160 going to control my diet i'm going to control what i can drink i'm going to control my workouts i'm going to 0.99
00:23:41.480 control what i do on a daily basis and what i read what i put in my brain and you start developing
00:23:49.020 these these mentalities about how to function properly in a progressive way while the rest of
00:23:56.300 the world is in chaos let me tell you something you're going to become the most bulletproof 1.00
00:24:00.820 motherfucker on the face of the fucking planet because no one will ever be able to fuck with you 1.00
00:24:05.700 again because it doesn't matter what's going on outside of your brain outside of your body you're 1.00
00:24:12.520 in control and that guys is peace of mind that is where happiness comes from that is where fulfillment
00:24:21.340 comes from that is where infectious confidence comes from those are things you want those are things
00:24:30.340 that will exponentially benefit your life so if you're not working on them right now start 0.96
00:24:36.940 told my teacher dumb bitch i'm going to get millions watch this in the project living down spoke it till 1.00
00:24:42.860 existed while i i'm from where you can't trust so welcome 0.99