37. The Hidden Coach That Lies Within All Of Us
Episode Stats
Summary
In this episode of The Realists, Andy Frisella talks about the importance of self-coaching and how it can be put into play in any area of your life. He also talks about his recent injury and how he dealt with it.
Transcript
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told my teacher dumb bitch i'm gonna get millions watch this in the project living
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spoke it till existence mo changed to 50 got mo cost than did i only weigh 180 but my watch
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cost 250 what's up guys it's andy frisella and this is the show for the realists say goodbye
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to the lies the fakeness and delusions of modern society and welcome to motherfucking reality guys
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today we have a real talk um i gotta give my team some props here all right because this is how this
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goes down i wake up and i say hey we need a podcast and my man madot and my man joe they show up here
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on a saturday at one o'clock in the afternoon to rip off a podcast and dude these guys are hungry
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they're ready to kick ass and win and dude i gotta tell you i gotta give you guys some props man they're
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both sitting here shaking their heads at me you can't see them or hear them but man i appreciate
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you guys you guys uh it's fun to be a part of a team that wants to win and uh and anyway that's
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that dude it was just on my mind i want to give you guys some public props so thank you guys and
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you guys asking what the difference in the show is and why it sounds so much better it's because we got
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my man joe who knows exactly what the fuck's up making it sound right for you guys so uh show him
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some love on his social media which is joseph young stl all right and follow my man and we're
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going to do some great shit and also follow madot which is uh what's your what's your social bro
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long live madot you change it we had something else for a while what was that groovy scarface all right
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but it's long live madot all right and that's m-i-d-m-i-d-h-a-t okay just like mid hat all right
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so anyway uh with that being said give these dudes a follow you know check out what they're doing
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they're doing some fun stuff joe does some really cool stuff on uh on his beats and his sounds that
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he's getting you guys showing you guys kind of the process and madot is showing you guys all kinds
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of you know graphics and cool stuff that we're doing there plus you know he's got a decent sense
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of humor sometimes so he's all right but anyway guys uh with that being said look we do have the
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fee you know the fee the fee is if we do a good job if we if we help you learn if we make you think
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if we make you laugh if we make you feel better if we give you a new perspective that helps you out
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with certain problem you might be having give us a share give us a like get write us a review on itunes
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uh share with your friends all right we don't do this for money in fact we invest a whole lot of
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money to do this and we do this to give back to you guys and i do have a awesome tip slash nugget slash
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idea that absolutely is going to change how you do things today all right so this morning i was working
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out and i was i've had a shoulder injury that has been really nagging and uh you know all you guys out
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there who are going to message me and say hey this this this this look i'm on top of it man i've been
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training for a long time i appreciate all your help but uh but that's not the point the point is is
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i'm in there training and usually lately i've been training with dj and today i train on my own
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and when i train on my own i notice something that i do that is not fucking normal and that is like
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i literally scream at myself while i'm working out and so what i i want to do is is kind of explain
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this process mentally for you guys so you guys could understand how to put it into play for you
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in any area of your life all right and that's called self-coaching all right a lot of people
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and a lot of you guys are always constantly looking for a coach or a mentor or a guide and
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that's great that is great because dude coaches help especially if they are experienced coaches
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dude i have guys i would call quote unquote coaches about all kinds of shit now i don't we you know
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they're not my quote unquote paid coach but they're friends of mine and you know like when it comes to
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business they might ask me some shit and i kind of coach them and when it comes to things that they
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are more experienced in uh i ask them and so everybody's got people and there's nothing there's
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no shame in having guides and coaches and mentors but the one that's going to make the biggest difference
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for you is your self-coaching all right because you can't have your coach there 24 hours a day
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it's not realistic for anybody even the most elite athletes in the world don't have access to someone
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just following them around saying hey do your shit all right that has to be us that's our
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responsibility now how i do this like in the weight room is for example and i'm not going to sit here
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like some of these dudes online they like to make you think that they're bulletproof and they like to
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make you think that uh that you know they never have weak thoughts but the truth is everybody has weak
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thoughts and everybody wants to quit everybody you guys probably have this perception that there's
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certain people out there that are just fucking animals and never even have the urge to quit
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and i feel like that's quite the opposite if we're being totally honest totally honest i think the people
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who you think are the biggest fucking animals are actually the ones that want to quit the most
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and i think the reason that they don't quit is because they finally tuned their self-coaching
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i know that's the case for me now there might be some motherfucking savages out there that just never
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ever feel the inkling and maybe they're further down the road than me i don't know but i can only talk
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for me and i think my life speaks a pretty good story for winning all right just i'm not trying to say
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that to brag i'm saying that just to be honest i think i set a good example for a lot of you guys
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who are younger who are trying to build something and uh wanting to build something real and whether
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that be your business or your body or your relationship or your friendships i feel very solid
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in all of those areas of my life uh and i'm proud of that but i want to tell you how that this happened
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for me and how i kind of put it all together and and it really comes down to me finally tuning my
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internal voice and my self-coaching now if you follow 75 hard and you listen to my content regarding
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that you know i talk a lot about the bitch voice and the boss voice all right all of us no matter how
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badass you are have this inside of us we all have the bitch voice that's the voice that tells us hey man
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you're fucking tired hey man you're hurt a little bit you should rest hey man you're worn down you
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need a break hey man you know what those emails can wait for tomorrow hey man you know what that
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meeting you're in charge you could you could cancel that meeting hey man you've got five more calls left
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today and really what you want to do is go drink a beer you know what it's okay to drink a beer and
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reward yourself that's the bitch voice all right we've all we all have it and and it usually kicks in
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when we're working out about three quarters of the way through the set or the workout right we get
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that urge where we're like ah i'm getting tired i don't feel it and dude i'm using the workout because
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that was the example today that made me realize that i do this so much in all areas but guys this
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is a voice that's present in all areas of life okay and it and it and it affects how we respond and what
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we do in all areas of life so you have to first of all you know decide what it is you really want
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what do you want what do you really want like there's there's a difference between you know i
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kind of this would be nice it would be nice to lose 50 pounds and look pretty good or i'm fucking losing
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50 pounds and i'm going to look like a fucking etched sculpture out of marble okay those are two
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different things and a lot of people confuse the first part with an actual goal that is never going
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to work if you're thinking in yourself in your mind right now you know what it'd be nice if i made
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twice as much money or it'd be nice if i lost 100 pounds or it'd be nice to be you know in good shape
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you're not going to make it that's just the truth and i'm not saying that to be rude i'm not saying
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that to be ignorant i'm not saying that to be an elitist or any kind of those things i'm saying that
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because it's reality success in all these areas is really fucking hard guys and it takes a lot of
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discipline and a lot of work and a constant awareness of if you are doing the work or not
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that's going to get you there and a lot of people never really delineate between
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what they really want and what would be nice for them most people think what they really want
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is what they tell themselves that would be really nice if i had that no that's not what i'm talking
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about i'm talking about setting a fucking goal for yourself that you are extremely extremely serious
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about achieving all right so you have to do that first and that might sound like common sense to some
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of you guys but i promise you to most people that is not those two things are the same thing when you
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when i say hey you need to have a goal they will respond back to me and they will say well
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you know if i could really like do anything you know i'd like to be i don't know 30 pounds lighter
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right that's what people say you've heard it you've probably said it all right that is not setting a
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goal setting a goal is motherfucker i am going to do whatever the fuck it takes to get down 30 pounds
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all right i'm doing it whatever it takes all day long with everything i do i'm going to get focused
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i'm going to make that happen all right so what do you really want because dude it's you don't have
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to want what everybody else wants you know a lot of people think well you know i should have a six
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pack you don't have to fucking have a six pack that's just what some people want and what some people
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are willing to pursue you don't have to be rich that's just what some people want so you have to
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decide what it is you want and get serious about it otherwise you're going to be real disappointed
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but moving on from that because that's the obvious thing right you have to start to train your inner
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voice to catch you when you're slipping so you have to become aware of what actions you're taking
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am i taking this action and is it supporting what i said i'm going to do okay and guys this is why the
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power list is such a huge deal i talk to you guys about it all the time and you don't need to buy our
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power list journals that's not a sales pitch my power list that i use is a fucking notebook i've used
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it since 2004 or i still have it and i have all my pages that i tore out from it from 2000 i can
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literally go back and look at what i was doing in june 2007 and see what i did on fucking may 15 2007
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that's pretty cool okay i have the literal blueprint for what we've built here based upon
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writing my goals down and paying attention to what the power list process is so if you want to if you
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want to learn more about that process you can go listen to episode 107 uh of the mfco in this feed or
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we reposted that episode uh recently at episode 16 all right in this feed so if you go to the real af
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episode 16 you're going to find that exact same podcast that is at episode 107 on the mfceo project
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and it's going to guide you through how to do this process i don't want to spend all kinds of time on
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this because i have a whole podcast dedicated to it and you need to listen to the whole podcast because
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it's a lot more involved than just writing your shit down but if you use that process and you execute
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against it with what we're going to talk about here and what we're talking about here you cannot
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fail it is impossible it's impossible to fail and i mean that you have to constantly have that
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awareness in your brain about all the little things that you do and so it has to get to a point where
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it's so specific that when you catch yourself skipping out on the tiniest little details one or two or
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three reps in your workout uh one or two or three emails skipping a meeting etc etc etc those things are
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cumulative just like they would be cumulative if you were to do them and you have to understand that
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so when you catch yourself slipping that's the cue for your your boss voice your strong winner voice
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to stop your weak voice your bitch voice and say uh-uh motherfucker you got three more to do
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and i literally do this like in the gym and if you follow me around all day you would see that i
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talk to myself constantly verbally all right usually when no one's around but sometimes when people are
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around too i actually verbally say it now you don't have to do this i find that more more effective
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for me all right and i actually kind of like it um but you have to learn to obey that voice when it
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catches you slipping when that voice kicks in your head and says ah motherfucker you ain't supposed to
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be eating that cupcake don't eat the cupcake when when when i text dj this morning and i said hey i'm
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not going to lift today because my my shoulder hurts and i need rest you know i thought about it for about
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30 minutes and you know what i did i got my fucking car and i went and worked out and i would lift it
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and i said you know what i'm not going to take the easy road i'm going to take the hard road
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this is the key guys you have to learn to obey this inner voice all the time your boss voice
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is the voice of your maximum potential your boss voice is going to be the voice that if you obey
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and if you listen to is going to help you produce the result that will be accumulation of all of your
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potential put together and this is what you want because you don't want to be the person that when your
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day comes and your day could be coming today you don't want to be that person that says man i wish
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i would have fucking gave a little bit more i wish i would have done a little bit more i wish i would
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have seen a little bit more of what the fuck i was made of all right you don't want that and some of
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you guys this might not resonate with you because you're you're you're not as high strung and you're
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not as driven and guys that is not that is i'm not giving you pressure i'm just telling you that if
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you want to fucking win this is a great way to train yourself how to win in all areas you want
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to be like everybody else i'm not judging you all right the world needs people to cook fucking french
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fries i get it but what i am telling you is if you want to fucking win you are going to have to start
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obeying the voice that catches you slip and when you slip and you have to obey it a hundred percent of
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time all right so you can do this silently right we all do this silently sometimes i think but most
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of the time it gets ignored and this is and i'm not sitting here trying to pump you on 75 hard but
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this is the power of 75 hard 75 hard will train you to listen to that boss voice exclusively and your
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life will greatly accelerate and if you ask anybody who has legitimately the right way finished 75 hard
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they will tell you the same it's a mental retraining all right but you can start to help this process
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every day when you catch yourself not wanting to do the things that you know you need to do
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it's very simple concept of self-coaching would you ignore your coach if he said oh motherfucker three
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more reps and he's standing right there ready to put his foot in your ass if you don't do it
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no i don't think you would i wouldn't all right some people might but those people probably aren't
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listening to this podcast you guys are fucking winners you guys want to win that's why you're
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here so this is a huge tool that you can use consistently on a daily basis and every kind
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of scenario that can help you guys get where you want to go all right when that voice kicks in and
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says oh man i'm tired saying oh fuck you bro now you're going to do extra shit because you're
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bitching that's what i do i do that with everything when i catch myself missing three reps guess what i do
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i do five reps i put the weights down i did this today put the weights down i said oh motherfucker
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you got three more guess what i did i did five as punishment for me being a fucking bitch all right
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this is something that you guys have to start doing this is something that i've done for a long time but
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i never put my finger on it that a lot of people don't and so i wanted to share this with you guys
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because i think it's a very powerful skill that a lot of people kind of look past because they don't
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want to feel bad right like right now all we're hearing in the in the media and you know i've
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talked a lot of shit on this too you know the self-love self-love is listening to your boss voice
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guys that's self-love because you're loving yourself to do what the fuck is right and what you really want
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and what's right for you and your family and the people that look up to you you're getting better
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and anything that gets you better is better for everybody else that looks at you as well
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and you guys have to step up and start taking responsibility as humans to be the best that you
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can because other people's existence depends on it whether you have kids whether you have neighbors
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is if you're not living in a fucking igloo where no one else in the world ever going to see you
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you're affecting the outcome for other people by the way that you live and that should fucking really
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make you think i think about that all the time and i take that responsibility serious
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all right so you don't have to have a million something followers or a big podcast or any of
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this shit or a company or anything start with leading yourself start with leading your fucking
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family and start by leading yourself by coaching yourself and listening to the great coach that lies
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told my teacher dumb bitch i'm gonna get millions watch this in the project living down spoke it till
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existed i'm from where you can't trust so welcome