Why Your Goals Should Embarrass You, with Andy Frisella - MFCEO198
Episode Stats
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Summary
In this episode of the MFCEO Project, Andy tells a story about how he went to a funeral that inspired him to talk about what it takes to think to win and how to be successful no matter where you are in life.
Transcript
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what is up guys you're listening to the MFCEO project I'm Andy I'm the host and I am the
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motherfucking CEO guys today is Friday fire I know usually we do Thursday thunder but today
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it's going to be Friday fucking fire all right if you're new first off welcome thank you for
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joining us we have two podcasts usually a week one on Tuesday which is a practical application
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podcast slash guest podcast one on Thursday or in this case Friday which is a motivational
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thought cultivating how to think podcast and those things can be very practical as well
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all right it's not just motivation right motivation is highly overrated right it's about discipline
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it's about doing shit that you know you need to do when you don't feel like doing it but we're not
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getting into that today today I have a story for you that I want to tell but before I tell a story
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I want to remind you what our mission is here okay this is not just a podcast the MFCEO project is
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called a project for a reason it's called a project because our mission is to change the way the youth
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thinks about what it takes to be successful and this involves a lot of things it involves a lot
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of practical skill things it involves a lot of ways to think but what we definitely aren't about here
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is about everybody being special everybody being a delicate flower everybody having good self-esteem
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and feeling great about themselves when they haven't done a goddamn thing to do so
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okay this is about reality this is about what it takes to win this is about what it takes to win
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how to think to win and what it takes to be successful no matter where you are in life
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this applies to entrepreneurs yes this is an entrepreneurial podcast yes this is a success
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podcast yes but the skills you will learn here are applicable to anybody at any level so you don't
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have to own your own company you can be the guy making french fries it doesn't matter the skills you
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will learn here will help you be successful that's why you're fucking here okay now with that being said
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we don't sell shit here we don't market things here I don't have a million ads I don't throw a million
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things down your throat and ask you to buy all I ask is this if you find value in this podcast and
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this is very important to me okay your success is important to me that's why I do this but what I
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ask of you in return is this click subscribe tell a friend and leave a review it takes five minutes of
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your time okay I'm going to help you be successful in return do those three things for me okay now
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here's the story that inspired what I'm about to talk about yesterday I had to go to the doctor
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for my yearly checkup and it was a great doctor's visit usually it's uh it usually doctors did suck
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but this is a good one because I've lost a hundred pounds basically since the last time I saw him so
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he was thrilled everything was great I was healthy it's all good we talked a lot he's a good friend of
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mine's dad I've known him my whole life and we he started talking about funerals and he said man you
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know what everybody's been dying and I'm like what do you mean he's like well my wife's mom died my uh
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my my uh daughter-in-law's mom died I've been going to all these fucking funerals I hate funerals
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and I started laughing I'm like dude nobody likes funerals he's like dude me too and so we got on this
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topic you know and isn't it true like funerals are the most awkward fucking thing ever like you go to
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a funeral you're standing there you know the casket's open and everybody's like oh doesn't
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doesn't she look beautiful no she doesn't look fucking beautiful she's fucking dead she looks like
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a fucking melted wax candle why do they even have open caskets I don't know if you all like that shit
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but him and I definitely did it and we got on this big discussion about you know how it's awkward
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you never know what to say and you're standing there you know and like when it's time to go
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you know you always feel like guilty but you're truly on the inside super excited to leave the
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funeral and you're like you know nudging whoever you're with you're like it's time to go and like
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you roll out and like you say all this awkward shit and like dude it's just weird like it's weird shit
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so this really has nothing to do with the story this is just me telling a story that of a story
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but when I die do not have an open casket a because I'm going to look like a fucking melted
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wax candle and b have a good fucking time because you know what I had a great time here if I die
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tomorrow I feel pretty good about what I'm doing don't fucking sit around and mope and act all fucking
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awkward at my funeral I'd be pissed off about that have a fucking beer have a shot of tequila and have
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a good fucking time all right now the story I wanted to tell you is about my drive home so on
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the way home from the doctor I pulled up and there was this young girl I don't know she was probably 25
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and she you could tell she was homeless she wasn't fake homeless like a lot of these people are she was
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homeless and uh she was standing there you know with a sign uh asking for money and I I'm driving
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my Rolls Royce okay so I pull up like right to the spot where she is and I'm looking at her and she's
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looking at me and I rolled the window down and I gave her a hundred bucks and she started fucking
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crying all right she freaked the fuck out and she said something she said I've been wondering how I'm
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going to get my kids a Christmas present and that's why I'm out here and I I thought to myself I'm like
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well you've got bigger problems than Christmas presents for your kids number one and number two
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shouldn't you have been thinking about that a long time ago as opposed to one or two weeks before
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Christmas and everybody has hard breaks I get it everybody has a hard life everybody has things
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happened to them that are out of control but the this is reflective of a bigger problem with
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everybody and that's what I want to talk about all right all of you guys want to be successful all of
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you guys want to do the great things all of you guys want to provide a great Christmas for your kids
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or be financially well off where you're not worried about money but yet statistically most of you
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listening are living paycheck to paycheck okay that's the stats statistically more than half of
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you are living paycheck to paycheck why is that well I'm going to tell you why it is it has nothing to do
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with your work ethic maybe it does but that it's likely doesn't we all work hard we all do our best
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and I'm betting that because you listen this podcast you're somebody who does their fucking best if
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you're listening this podcast you don't do your fucking best why the fuck are you listening so
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I'm assuming that you're somebody who works hard you're somebody who does but you can't figure out
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why things aren't happening to you why things aren't going great for you why things aren't developing
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for you I'm going to tell you why it's very simple there has never been somebody who set their goal
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to be a legitimate billionaire and when I say set their goal they legitimately committed all of their
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actions all of their efforts all of their thoughts into becoming a billionaire there has never ever
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fucking been ever someone who committed to becoming a billionaire that didn't at least become a
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millionaire never happened it's never fucking happened okay yet when I talk to people when I go speak
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or in person I say how much money you want to make the the 98% of the time they say this 100 grand
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I want to make 100 grand okay you motherfuckers don't understand the concept that you have to set
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massive goals you have to set goals that are so fucking big that you have a problem believing them
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and then you have to go out and commit to achieving those goals and you know what's going to happen
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you're probably not going to hit those goals but what is going to happen is you're going to fall
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somewhere of short you're going to fall somewhere short that is so much better than where you are
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because you're setting unrealistic goals and when you set unrealistic goals you have
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unrealistic action because you understand that to hit those goals you're going to have to take
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massive fucking action all right so what do you do you go out and you do the most you fucking can
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you kick ass you do everything you can and guess what you fall a little bit short so you didn't
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become a billionaire but guess what you became a 10 millionaire or a 100 millionaire or a 500
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millionaire but I'm telling you one thing for fucking sure nobody that went out there and said
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I want to make 100 grand made 150 fucking grand or made 200 grand or made 500 grand you guys are
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thinking about it the wrong way you have to plan ahead and by planning ahead you have to create a life
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in your head that is so fucking great that even if you fall short you're going to be better than
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everybody else this is the way that goals work I know that when you were in school your teachers told
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you to set realistic goals I know that when you went to college and you talked to people about
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advisors who have never done a goddamn thing in their life by the way I know they told you to set
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realistic goals but you know what realistic goals get bullshit realistic lives nobody that changed
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the world set realistic goals not the motherfuckers that invented the airplane the Wright brothers not
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the motherfuckers that invented anything great anything anything great the automobile shit that we use
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on a daily basis to take advantage of the fucking refrigerator the fucking wheel the fucking caveman who
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invented the motherfucking wheel he didn't say hey I'm gonna set a realistic goal and come up with some
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other bullshit he said man I'm gonna come up with something that fucking gets me where I want to go
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with as little little effort as possible you guys are setting your goals too fucking small and the reason
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I'm bringing this up now is because New Year's is coming around and New Year's is coming around and
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everybody's gonna set fucking goals well listen to me right now if you want to make 100 grand you better set
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your goal to make a million if you want to make a million you better set your goal to make 10 million
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if you want to make 10 million you better set it to make 100 million that's how it fucking works and
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you had better put in the when you're setting those goals when you say I want to make 100 grand in your
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heart you want to make 100 and you set the goal to make a million your dot your actions better back up
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that million dollar goal you guys don't get it setting small obtainable goals is how you earn a
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small obtainable life setting huge unrealistic goals is how you build a huge unrealistic legendary
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existence on this planet so whatever it is you want doesn't matter if it's money doesn't matter if
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it's anything else if you're setting your goal exactly what it is you are never gonna fucking have it
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that's the truth okay and you're gonna say well what about the power list the power list is something
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different if you haven't gone and listened to 107 you need to go listen to episode 107 we talk about
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the power list the power list is a way to break down massive goals and create new habits that will
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help you get to those massive goals okay this is about developing habits this is about developing
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confidence this is about developing momentum that's what the power list is for it's not about setting
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fucking goals whatever your goals are you need to use something like a vision board or a piece of paper
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or an excel spreadsheet and I'm telling you right now the biggest disservice you can do is to set them
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realistically if you want to drive a fucking bmw you better start thinking about driving a fucking
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ferrari if you want to drive a fucking lamborghini you better start thinking about driving a bugatti
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that's how this works okay you're gonna fall short shit's gonna happen even if you don't fall short
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you're never gonna exceed the goal that's the best you can do that's the best possible result
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I hit my goal that's what fucking losers say winners never hit their fucking goal because
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they're always working to get better you guys have to understand this concept stop setting realistic
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fucking goals stop thinking about the minimum that you would have want to have to be happy
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people get all hung up on this because they're afraid to voice what they really want because they're
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too modest or they're afraid their friends are laughing if your friends aren't laughing at your
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fucking goals you don't have real fucking goals that's the reality okay you have to understand
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that if you want to succeed if you want to make a million dollars if you want to fucking live in a
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nice house if you want all these things even if you don't voice them even if you say oh you know I
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just want to be happy but in reality you want all this fucking awesome shit you better set massive
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fucking goals and the actions better match that because here's what happens guys when we set these
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little goals we set these little goals for ourselves well you know I want to make a hundred thousand
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dollars and I'm sure most of you don't make a hundred thousand dollars and I'm telling you the
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reason why is because you're not trying to make a fucking million that's reality oh I'm gonna make
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a hundred thousand dollars and what happens uh you're making 60 right now or you're making 50 right
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now you're like oh well that's that's not that far away from me so you know when shit gets hard
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when when uh when you have a feeling like you don't want to do the things that you need to do
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you talk yourself out you're like oh you know what I just pick it up tomorrow I'll just skip today
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I'll pick it up tomorrow uh and then we'll be okay and you do this over and over and over again
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and at the end of the year you haven't done fucking anything all right but when you set massive goals
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and you commit to those goals and you believe that you're going to achieve those goals and you work
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every fucking second to hit those goals because they're unrealistic guess what's going to happen
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you're not going to skip out on a little shit you're not going to go you're not going to say
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oh I'll wait till tomorrow you're not going to do all that bullshit you're going to know that it's
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going to take every fucking ounce of your being every every fucking ounce of your character every
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fucking ounce of your effort and every fucking ounce of your time to get to that goal so what do you do
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you commit all that shit to it and what happens you start developing big actions you start developing
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big habits you start developing big winning mentality and then what happens you start to win
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you start to see results you start to achieve things that previously nobody would have told you that you
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could achieve they're going to say shit like this oh man it's so awesome you did that that's that's
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unbelievable well you fucking believed you committed you did the action you guys are selling
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yourself short you're you're taking your potential and you're fucking squashing it you're taking all
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the things that you could be and you're setting them on fucking fire by setting realistic goals
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realistic goals realistic goals ruin potential realistic goals ruin lives realistic goals create
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regret so when you're setting your goals this year don't set your goals to what you fucking think
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everybody else will approve of don't set your goals for what you think would be realistic set them 10
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times that a hundred times that and then learn how to take a hundred times action
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you're only hurting yourself with this bullshit guys you're waiting too long you're taking too
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little action you're setting too little goals and like i said nobody that sets a goal for a hundred
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grand ever makes 150 nobody that sets a goal for a million makes 10 million it works the other way
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if you want to make a hundred you try to make a million and guess what you might end up making
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400 or you might end up making 700 okay but i would say try to make way more than that
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teach yourself to take way bigger action than that what kind of value could you bring to your company
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if your goal was let's say you're making ten dollars an hour right now and your goal literally is to make
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500 grand what would that affect you how would you how would you become valuable then you would do every
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fucking thing that you could to kick ass you would do everything you could to bring value you would do
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everything you could to improve the situation of that company because you knew that for you to make
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500 grand you were going to have to be the best motherfucker in the room at all times you were going to have
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to be the guy that everybody else points to and says that's the fucking guy but you're not doing
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that i know you're not doing that because 99.99 of people don't fucking do it so if you take anything
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from me take this when you sit down and you write your little new year's fucking resolutions set your goals
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big set your goals unrealistic and then talk yourself into them make a vision board think about
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your life think about what it would look like i've talked about this in all different podcasts i guess
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i'll talk about it now two tools that i use okay vision board actual pictures of what i want my life
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to be like okay do i have a fucking 10 000 square foot house on my fucking board no i have a 27 000
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square foot house on my board and you know what i live in a 10 000 square foot house it fucking works
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i have a four million dollar car on my fucking vision board and you know what i have a fucking
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five hundred thousand dollar car a few of them in my fucking garage get it set your goals fucking huge
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huge huge huge okay put them on a vision board look at the motherfucker all the time the other thing
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that you need to do is you need to learn how to visualize you need to learn and this is how you're
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going to train yourself to believe in these goals okay and when you believe in these goals then you
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start taking the big action that's where the powerful shit happens learn how to visualize this
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is how i do it there's a lot of books out there on how to visualize this is how i do it i lay in bed
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at night before i go to bed and i start to think about what my life will look like all right back in
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2006 2007 when i was fucking making zero fucking dollars basically and i had to move back home to my dad's
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house seven years into owning my company you know what i used to think about i thought about flying
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around a private jet i thought about driving a fucking lamborghini and guess what i was fucking
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in debt then i was sixty thousand dollars in debt at that point i had no reason to believe that i was
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going to be able to drive a lamborghini or fly in a private jet but guess what i do that shit every
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fucking week now okay here's the deal i lay down i close my eyes i see myself and this is the exact
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vision that i used to tell to myself and show myself that taught myself to believe in this
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i used to see myself pulling up to the airport in my lamborghini lamborghini was white i would look
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around inside the lamborghini and i would see all the carbon fiber and i would see all the the fine
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materials that the car was made of i would look at all the buttons when i got up to the airport i would
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flip the door and the door would raise up and i would i would see the inside of the door in fine
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detail see the stitching i would see the alcantara i would see all the beautiful materials the car was
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made of and i would see the door go up and i would look outside and outside the hole of the door would
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be an airplane a private plane okay and back then i didn't know any difference between private planes so
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it was just a fucking private jet and it was white and had some stripes on it and the stairs came down
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and the stairs were lined with a chrome handrail and i would get out of the car and i would walk up
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and i would run my hand up the chrome handrail and i would look inside the jet and the jet had
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beige interior okay with black carpet and it was really nice with marble finishes and i looked inside
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and i could see all the seats and i could see what the seats look like and i could pick where i wanted
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to sit and i would go down and i would sit down and i would sit in the seat and try to feel how soft
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the seat was and what the leather felt like okay and i do this every fucking night for years
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the same thing over and over and over again and why did i pick that vision because i figured if i'm
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driving a lamborghini to the motherfucking airport get on my own fucking plane i'm doing all right
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that's the truth all right but here's my point back when i had no reason to believe in it when i had
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no no no fucking indication that that was going to be how it was i still was focusing on that i was
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setting massive unobtainable goals in terms of what other people would think when i used to tell
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people what i do they were fucking laughing me when i told people what i was going to do they
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laugh at me guess what i fucking done it all because i set goals huge i set goals that people
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didn't believe in and then i didn't worry that they didn't believe in i tried to teach myself to
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believe in them and then once i believed in them i would i would work on having other people believe
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in them okay guys set huge goals set massive massive goals 10 times bigger than what you
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would actually need to be happy don't set your goals for what you need to be happy because you'll
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always be living below that level if you're living below the level of happiness then you're living a
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shitty life you're all capable of this all of you set massive goals 10 times 200 times million times
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bigger than what you need because if you have more than what you need guess what you can give it to
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other people but if you're trying to make 100 grand you're never going to make it you're going to make
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less if you're trying to make a million you better try to make 10 million and the actions have to
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back that up so guys the lesson here is this quit thinking fucking small quit thinking like
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everybody else quit thinking dreams and goals that you think are realistic and retrain what your