SHNEAKO - January 19, 2022


I Ate a Puppy to See What the Hype Was About


Episode Stats


Length

16 minutes

Words per minute

133.63449

Word count

2,268

Sentence count

108

Harmful content

Misogyny

15

sentences flagged

Toxicity

25

sentences flagged

Hate speech

18

sentences flagged


Summary

Summaries generated with gmurro/bart-large-finetuned-filtered-spotify-podcast-summ .

On this week's episode of The Jerks, the Jerks take a trip to the upstate museum to see a new art exhibit and talk about their feelings about it. They also talk about how they're going to thrift together.

Transcript

Transcript generated with Whisper (turbo).
Misogyny classifications generated with MilaNLProc/bert-base-uncased-ear-misogyny .
Toxicity classifications generated with s-nlp/roberta_toxicity_classifier .
Hate speech classifications generated with facebook/roberta-hate-speech-dynabench-r4-target .
00:00:00.960 Broke, broke, broke. Walking is so poor, bro.
00:00:04.440 Shut up. 0.99
00:00:06.300 Ew, bro. 1.00
00:00:07.360 Haven't had my car for three weeks now, and I'm taking the train just like a f*** normie. 0.95
00:00:12.080 Every pin time. 0.93
00:00:25.200 Every time.
00:00:26.740 Every time I have to take the normie transportation.
00:00:29.420 Why is it so dark?
00:00:31.420 Good morning.
00:00:33.420 I changed her.
00:00:37.420 Good morning.
00:00:39.420 Good morning.
00:00:47.420 Attention customers.
00:00:49.420 A reminder.
00:00:51.420 We're these people now.
00:00:53.420 This is how I used to come in from New Haven back when I was a wee little lad.
00:00:57.420 was a wee little lad eight years old coming to find weed dealers in central park and not find
00:01:03.100 any and then walk to harlem and get scared any anywhere yeah pick the cutest boy what are you
00:01:11.020 doing man just live in the moment be in the moment
00:01:22.140 why do you think i look like you
00:01:27.420 that was that was her she was she said she was gonna
00:01:35.880 all right we're here at the upstate museum everyone here just it's like a different
00:01:44.240 version of me alternate universe bunch of nerd hipsters coming in from brooklyn to get a break
00:01:48.740 from the city i don't feel bad i'm not basic it wasn't my idea to come here it was her i'm just 0.75
00:01:54.020 year like to be a good boyfriend and shit so i'm really part of this whole fake you know fake deep 0.75
00:01:59.220 wannabe artist type shit like that's not me i'm just gonna take a train upstate and go to uh this 0.96
00:02:05.960 new museum and like see this cool new exhibit and like we're just gonna like and then like we should 0.99
00:02:10.220 take shrooms and then talk about our feelings wow this fucking nerd has to love everything like just 0.99
00:02:16.240 go around filming shit like fucking weirdo sometimes i think we really need to bring a 1.00
00:02:20.740 little bit of toxic masculinity back Timothy is this whole place just a 1.00
00:02:37.620 converted warehouse I feel like this used to be a factory and they put deep
00:02:41.360 stuff in here what does this make me feel this one makes me feel devastation
00:02:47.360 but this one elation I'd have to say the one here nothing really this one doesn't
00:02:53.040 do it for me I don't know why I need this one this one right here
00:03:04.640 it's reminiscent of a squid game you know my favorite album was of last year
00:03:12.560 Whole lot of red
00:03:14.700 Delete that part of the video. I don't want that joking. I really like that piece. It's really modern
00:03:28.240 Babe, can you get a cute video of me walking through the exhibit? I want to get a picture next to the lights
00:03:33.140 Can you I want it? I want a cute video like that. Can you can I do that?
00:03:42.560 Thank you.
00:04:12.560 so nobody knows anything except by comparison yeah flavin i think i could steal that enough
00:04:29.960 i say ain't really nobody knows anything except for by comparison i want to hate on it more but 0.51
00:04:34.880 there's a pretty cool museum dm museum in beacon upstate new york just don't record only take
00:04:40.020 photos they're good though i got came up to three four times for recording and having my mask down
00:04:45.460 okay now can i get a cute video of you walking let's go do a cute walk now before they come 0.93
00:04:49.300 be extra cute you got to make up for all the yeah cute cute cute i'll tag you in that that's 1.00
00:04:53.780 good you're gonna go viral on that there's no one else here
00:04:56.180 we recognize that gender is the spectrum please use the bathroom you know I had doubts about this 1.00
00:05:17.960 museum but
00:05:18.520 do you want me to get you crawling
00:05:27.820 uh oh
00:05:37.680 this is what you gotta do
00:05:38.640 free game for you wannabe vloggers right now
00:05:40.640 I got the blinking red battery
00:05:42.080 but they think the fanny pack just for the fashion
00:05:44.780 but I keep that thing on me
00:05:45.720 back up at all times
00:05:47.940 ready
00:05:48.660 perfect girlfriend activity 0.93
00:05:54.740 waste time thrifting
00:05:56.140 get a cute video of me thrifting
00:05:58.560 seriously
00:06:03.820 I just uploaded on my main channel yesterday
00:06:06.500 a video that I've been working on for so long
00:06:08.100 and instead of sitting down alone in my apartment
00:06:10.340 reading every single comment about it
00:06:11.940 I just gotta stay busy
00:06:12.820 I just gotta occupy my mind with a bunch of
00:06:14.580 try to not stress out too much
00:06:17.640 Keep your mind occupied to distract yourself from bad feelings.
00:06:20.880 You feel what I'm saying?
00:06:21.580 You don't have time to read hate comments, you know?
00:06:24.200 This is, huh?
00:06:25.480 A bong, maybe? 0.96
00:06:26.480 You see what I'm saying?
00:06:27.100 Stay focused, huh?
00:06:28.760 Every man ever knows how to find the perfect place to sit in a department store
00:06:33.760 while their mom, sister, or girlfriend shops for four hours.
00:06:36.880 I don't see any chairs yet, but there's got to be a stool or like a little square somewhere
00:06:41.540 I can sit and look at my phone.
00:06:45.800 Bingo.
00:06:47.640 I thought there wasn't anything in here but I didn't think there could be the perfect shirt
00:07:17.640 They're like little worms they do look like little hamsters
00:07:43.800 I don't know how she'll feel about it because she doesn't even like the kids holding them
00:07:54.320 Where are you going?
00:07:55.460 Oh my gosh
00:07:56.320 Oh my goodness
00:07:59.880 I had hamsters when I was a kid. This is exactly the same
00:08:03.620 Yeah, right?
00:08:06.240 Okay, she's squeaking a lot. Am I scaring her?
00:08:08.580 That's not the girl 1.00
00:08:09.540 Oh, it's scaring him
00:08:10.400 Don't mischame
00:08:11.420 Okay, I'm sorry. I'm sorry
00:08:12.580 she has no art which one is it it's a he or she he has no spots it might come out though after a
00:08:16.980 month so they double their size already yeah wow that was quick just can't hear or see anything 1.00
00:08:22.100 yeah you could scream it i hate you oh why would you say you're so stupid i could squeeze you right 1.00
00:08:28.020 now ah idiot ah ah i hate you oh my god stop don't say negative things but it literally can't hear 1.00
00:08:38.180 anything negative negative negative oh my god stop it's just laying there i don't think he even 1.00
00:08:42.980 knows what's going on okay my turn i want to hold on they just pee and poop in here well she um licks 1.00
00:08:47.620 them and then she basically eats their pee and poop the mom yeah it's not weird because like i 0.81
00:08:53.060 don't know she just licks it it comes out and she looks it it's not weird not really it's either you
00:08:59.860 let her lick it or you do it yourself yeah and you have to wed it yourself miss monopoly and it's the 1.00
00:09:04.260 first game where women make more than men and basically it's we live in a in a 0.98
00:09:10.500 world where we have to deal with that every day this is just a game you play
00:09:13.520 for a few hours yeah so basically all around the board instead of property
00:09:17.580 you're buying things that wouldn't have created a good one was Wi-Fi or yeah
00:09:22.860 women get a Wi-Fi but they covered it up oh yeah men how it should be that's 1.00
00:09:30.900 not and so basically in the start of the game you get money but women start out 1.00
00:09:37.200 with 1,900 and men start out with 1,500 and then when you pass the go women get
00:09:44.520 two hundred and forty dollars men get two hundred dollars so is this like a
00:09:47.860 game that anyone's gonna actually want to play or is it just fun to explain the
00:09:50.960 rules it's fine it's really fun to play like the only industry I've seen where
00:09:56.820 there was a wage gap in force was the fashion industry and women 0.78
00:10:00.480 automatically made double for the same exact job like i worked for nike i worked for nike with the
00:10:05.120 same amount of time the same amount of hours and then they would take home 6 000 i took home like
00:10:09.360 1500. the only wage gap i've experienced was just like getting berber same thing every single one
00:10:17.920 so where's my wage gap game like that's my experience is women get more than men 0.92
00:10:21.120 real life my life is this i should get this game yeah that's only one industry i have
00:10:27.760 nineteen hundred dollars and so where's my where's my money i need 1900 all right just no this is
00:10:33.280 1500 for you because you're a man so i told you that i'm gender fluid and i identify as a woman
00:10:40.400 today i hope you can respect my identity because for this game i'm identifying as a woman so i'm
00:10:44.560 gonna take another thousand because i'm trans i have more disadvantages than a woman first off 1.00
00:10:49.040 You don't even know what it's like to be trans. So maybe give me all the hotels to start off because that 1.00
00:10:53.420 I'm just gonna take the whole bank because I'm also a minority
00:10:56.920 You know how many genders there are 1.00
00:10:59.460 Um
00:11:00.920 Actually, there's infinite genders. She said too. I caught it. I caught I did catch it 0.93
00:11:05.480 I love playing games with the wage gap 1.00
00:11:08.700 And every turn you have to say that men are trash 0.99
00:11:13.760 Nope, okay. Oh, that's it brown 1.00
00:11:16.320 uh cappuccino or liver and onion ew liver yep it's chocolate there's liver and onion ew why
00:11:28.880 you have no reaction oh my god that's so bad spit it out you don't have to that's an onion
00:11:38.400 livery organ feel wait that doesn't taste bad it tastes terrible it's really bad it's really bad
00:11:45.440 It's stuck on my teeth now. I can't spit it out buttered popcorn or rotten egg
00:11:57.860 Okay, so it's one of those
00:12:02.960 Now that's definitely old bandage
00:12:07.600 That's just like paper mache
00:12:10.100 It's like pain I ate the whole thing. How's that fair eat the whole thing you wanna taste it
00:12:15.440 It's old. It tastes like pain.
00:12:19.020 Oh, that's really bad.
00:12:23.740 Warm.
00:12:26.080 Look, look.
00:12:26.900 You see?
00:12:28.080 Oh my god.
00:12:28.820 Oh my god.
00:12:30.260 Oh my god.
00:12:32.840 This really needs to empty.
00:12:38.260 Because she's so gentle.
00:12:39.720 He's yanking it out.
00:12:40.960 Yeah, with his whole neck.
00:12:42.140 This one is just...
00:12:43.940 So gentle.
00:12:45.440 This is the boy, right?
00:12:46.440 Yeah, both those are the boys. 0.97
00:12:48.440 Savages.
00:12:49.440 So funny the difference.
00:12:50.440 She's so calm.
00:12:51.440 Literally pushing so much, and he's standing up.
00:12:53.440 This dog's in labor right now.
00:12:55.440 The dog has a C-section for 8 a.m.
00:12:56.440 It's literally going to labor right now.
00:12:58.440 Oh, my God.
00:12:59.440 This dog is about to explode six babies.
00:13:01.440 Look at that.
00:13:02.440 You okay?
00:13:04.440 Oh, my.
00:13:05.440 This dog is literally going to labor right now.
00:13:09.440 Calm down.
00:13:10.440 There's just like five or six living dogs inside her stomach right now.
00:13:14.440 right now. Women are so dramatic. I'm like, calm down. I'm not taking care of these babies. 1.00
00:13:22.480 I hope you know that, bro. You want your own. Nah, she panicking right now. I ain't gonna hold.
00:13:32.600 Wait, she's really giving birth right now? Wasn't it supposed to be tomorrow morning at 8?
00:13:38.660 When her temperature drops, it's 24 hours. I thought it was supposed to be a C-section.
00:13:42.220 it is it is okay i had a feeling i saw i knew she was gonna pop i knew she wasn't gonna make
00:13:50.320 it to that c-section it's too much yo oh i got you this is a moment right here how many how many
00:13:57.760 dogs are gonna be in this house now do you know let's say let's say it's five it's five yeah six
00:14:03.080 7 8 with those three maybe 13 13 dogs in one crib
00:14:20.400 They all survive
00:14:33.080 Jingle
00:14:40.900 Jingle
00:14:44.840 Good
00:14:47.340 It's very strange
00:14:49.060 mountain
00:14:54.900 This is the Grand Central Oyster Bar.
00:15:11.300 I used to come here a lot when I was a kid.
00:15:13.100 This was the spot.
00:15:14.100 You didn't even have to get off the train and you already get pretty good food.
00:15:24.900 everyone comes here and then commutes home to greenwich connecticut after a long day of working
00:15:34.560 in midtown and having a long lunch with two cocktails come here eat some oysters and wait
00:15:40.320 for the off-peak hours to start now you're really weird if you don't like oysters i don't like you
00:15:44.820 i don't trust you because this is a delicacy straight from the ocean they're like oceans
00:15:49.020 boogers you gotta put a little lemon a little hot sauce on it if you don't like oysters you
00:15:52.740 still cut the crust off. You probably take the tomatoes out of your burger too. Grow the fuck up.
00:16:01.240 That's amazing. That works? 0.97
00:16:03.040 Wait, say something to me real quick. You gotta try it.
00:16:04.940 Let me hear. Okay.
00:16:06.900 You gotta turn it around.
00:16:09.080 How you doing, bud? What the fuck? 0.99
00:16:13.520 Yeah. 1.00
00:16:15.560 That's cool. I just realized
00:16:17.060 my last video on my main channel, the one I've been
00:16:18.880 stressing about, was demonetized and it
00:16:20.940 Just got monetized after 200,000 views.
00:16:24.040 Just lost on like a couple thousand dollars that I would like to have.
00:16:28.780 It's good that it's going to hopefully do well now.
00:16:30.840 But it's like, oh, okay.
00:16:31.760 If I waited two days, I would have made 2,000 more dollars, hopefully.
00:16:35.140 Should I have waited to post it?
00:16:36.460 Yeah.
00:16:38.120 What if I waited and it didn't get monetized and I just waste time?
00:16:41.160 But if you knew there was no reason for it to not get monetized, then...
00:16:44.860 Well, I know.
00:16:45.360 There's never a reason.
00:16:46.280 You should have expected it to get monetized. 1.00
00:16:48.120 They do that shit regardless. 0.99
00:16:49.340 But you see what I'm saying? 1.00
00:16:49.880 Like, I should have waited, but it's about the art.
00:16:52.040 You feel what I'm saying?
00:16:52.680 It's not about all that blah, blah, blah, money, money, money.
00:16:55.080 It's about the creation.
00:16:56.160 It's not all about the money.
00:16:57.520 10.03 at night.