Tate Speech - November 19, 2023


Burning Ferrari Hot Sauce | Tate Confidential Ep 196


Episode Stats

Length

9 minutes

Words per Minute

127.26316

Word Count

1,209

Sentence Count

159

Misogynist Sentences

3

Hate Speech Sentences

4


Summary

Tristan and Andrew are at a restaurant and need to eat all the food, but no one else can because they're scared of the stairs. Only one of them can do the job, and that's Tristan. Also, it's too hot in here, and the air conditioning isn't working right, so we need to turn on the air conditioner. We also find out that Tristan doesn't know how to cook, and Andrew doesn't even know what he's cooking, but he's good enough to do it anyway. This episode was written and produced by Alex Blumberg, and edited by Patrick Muldowney. Our theme song is Come Alone by Suneaters, courtesy of Lotuspool Records. Music by PSOVOD and tyops, and our ad music is by Zapsplat. We'd like to learn a little more about you, the listeners. Please take a few minutes to fill out this brief survey. We'll see if we can answer some of the most common questions you guys had about the podcast and give us some insight into what we can do to improve the podcast in the future episodes. Thanks for listening and/or send us your best shot of the podcast! <3 -Eugene and Andrew -The Best Squeak Thanks to our sponsor, and for sponsoring the podcast. -Our theme song was written by our new ad music was done by our good friend, . . . and we hope you like it. . Thank you so much for your support and support the podcast, we really appreciate it. We really appreciate you. and really appreciate the support we've been able to make this podcast, it means a lot of people are amazing. Thank you, thank you, so much, and it's a lot, and we really mean it. <3 - Thank you for being a pleasure to do this podcast and it really helps us out a lot. , and we appreciate it, so thank you for listening. XOXO -A very special thank you. -Amen and a very special thanks you, bye, bye. -P.E. xoxo -A.B. - -B.A. & P.O. -TRAVY -Sue -TJ & AYO -BJ. -JUICY -


Transcript

00:00:00.000 Outro Is Tristan seriously incapable of finding the staircase to come up to?
00:00:12.000 We've been waiting forever.
00:00:14.000 Tristan for you, bro. Mr.
00:00:15.000 Tough Guy. Scared of stairs.
00:00:18.000 I have an idea. Which idea?
00:00:21.000 I'm good, bro. I'm good. I'm okay.
00:00:23.000 There's a lot of people in the restaurant.
00:00:24.000 I say we eat all the food so no one else can get any of it.
00:00:27.000 All of it. Can we do that?
00:00:29.000 We need to eat all the food.
00:00:33.000 He's on the way, thank goodness. Only Tristan can do that.
00:00:36.000 Well, that's the plan.
00:00:37.000 He's a hero. Tristan, I have a plan, but I need your help.
00:00:41.000 Tell me. So obviously we're at Marriott.
00:00:43.000 We're getting lunch. There's all these people here.
00:00:45.000 They've been waiting all week to get food, I would imagine.
00:00:47.000 We're going to eat all the food.
00:00:49.000 All the food. So no one else can have any.
00:00:51.000 I'm down. Let's eat the food. Are you down? Sure.
00:00:54.000 Andrew, Tristan's in on the plan.
00:00:57.000 We're going to eat all the food. I'm down.
00:01:00.000 I'm the man you need on that team if that's ever gonna happen.
00:01:02.000 Ten plates each. I'm the man you can count on.
00:01:04.000 We're gonna do some damage. Have you ever been to Ponderosa?
00:01:07.000 No. Jeez.
00:01:09.000 How American are you?
00:01:11.000 What's Ponderosa? Does it still exist?
00:01:13.000 I have no idea. I went to Bonderoso's and I ate in Indiana.
00:01:16.000 Is it like a crazy buffet? It's a Mexican all-you-can-eat buffet.
00:01:18.000 Oh my god. I thought Bonderoso was Mexican.
00:01:21.000 They have some Mexican food with all of America.
00:01:22.000 Do they have Mexican food in Romania?
00:01:24.000 I've never eaten Mexican in Romania.
00:01:25.000 No, there is none. There is. There's a restaurant.
00:01:26.000 It's a Mexican restaurant. We're going.
00:01:28.000 Nice. The Mexican-Romanian food.
00:01:30.000 I know why. I'm asking you if you are feeling scared.
00:01:34.000 We know what you're scared of.
00:01:36.000 Are you feeling terrified? I'm sorry I did this to you.
00:01:40.000 What are you talking about?
00:01:42.000 You are scared of ducks, as we know.
00:01:45.000 Oh, shit. I will duck over to the table.
00:01:47.000 I hate ducks. So you're scared of ducks?
00:01:49.000 Duck is a nasty, nasty meat.
00:01:52.000 You're scared. Scared of ducks.
00:01:56.000 Alright, I'll go get some duck.
00:02:02.000 We had a preposterous amount of coffee this morning.
00:02:04.000 Why are we drinking coffee again? Tristan just ordered 15 double espressos.
00:02:10.000 Why are we doing this?
00:02:13.000 I don't think the average person could have the amount of caffeine that we have in a day all week long.
00:02:18.000 Sorry, what's an average person?
00:02:19.000 I haven't seen one in forever.
00:02:21.000 I certainly don't live with average people, so what's the average person?
00:02:25.000 There's me and then all you losers are far below average 13,000 just a shoe polishing kit That's very cool. This isn't normal.
00:02:51.000 We just came here for food and now we're just blowing money for no reason.
00:02:58.000 $13,000 for a box.
00:03:03.000 Why? He doesn't need this.
00:03:06.000 It is 13,000 lei, so I don't know if that comes out to Euros or USD. It's like 3,000.
00:03:12.000 He literally just spent 3,000 USD on this.
00:03:16.000 The box. He literally would.
00:03:18.000 He doesn't need this. First time.
00:03:29.000 First time driving this car, I have no idea.
00:03:31.000 Okay, so...
00:03:33.000 That looks correct.
00:03:41.000 Low windshield washer fluid.
00:03:44.000 Thanks for watching!
00:03:51.000 Interesting. Oh, what the fuck?
00:03:55.000 Ferrari. Fucking retard.
00:03:58.000 Overcomplicate shit. There's touchscreen shit all over the steering wheel.
00:04:01.000 Right now, it's somehow trying to record my voice and understand what I said.
00:04:06.000 Air conditioning! Yo.
00:04:14.000 Please, can you better explain your request?
00:04:19.000 Maximum air conditioning.
00:04:21.000 Does that work?
00:04:30.000 Fuck you.
00:04:33.000 Thanks for watching!
00:04:35.000 Bye.
00:04:36.000 This is hot air!
00:04:39.000 Explain this to me, baby.
00:04:40.000 Make this make sense, please.
00:04:42.000 I've tried.
00:04:49.000 You think I haven't tried pressing the blue cold thing?
00:04:53.000 Because I fucking have, mate.
00:04:55.000 Good luck negotiating with that touchscreen shit.
00:04:59.000 This is a bullshit. People don't realize it's actually roasting in here.
00:05:05.000 It's fucking boiling hot. It's boiling hot.
00:05:07.000 I'm sweating in this fucking vehicle.
00:05:13.000 What is this shit?
00:05:14.000 Some sort of assassination attempt by Andrew?
00:05:16.000 Disable the fucking air conditioning?
00:05:19.000 It's too bloody hot in here.
00:05:21.000 It's actually hot.
00:05:24.000 This is stupid.
00:05:26.000 This is stupid.
00:05:31.000 Double Ferrari Aikido.
00:05:33.000 The world needs to know that Andrew's actually a chef.
00:05:57.000 Listen, I don't cook.
00:05:59.000 Not because I can't cook, but because it's a waste of fucking time.
00:06:01.000 I never cook. Fuck.
00:06:03.000 Because I'm worth hundreds of millions of dollars, and I want something exceptionally tasty, I'm cooking.
00:06:08.000 What are you making? A ingredient list.
00:06:11.000 Chicken with ten types of hot sauce.
00:06:14.000 Scotch bonnet, Tabasco, Red Hot, Extra Hot, this one, Supernova, 10 different types of hot sauce.
00:06:23.000 And then loads and loads of salt and garlic powder.
00:06:26.000 There's only a pussy has one type of hot sauce on this chicken Bang it!
00:06:33.000 It's gonna be bad boy.
00:06:34.000 Get boiling water, make sure it's everywhere.
00:06:36.000 And we're done.
00:06:38.000 Turn up to max heat, because that's how heroes cook.
00:06:40.000 Max!
00:06:42.000 The chicken will sit in the fridge.
00:06:44.000 So heat it up in the frying pan.
00:06:46.000 When you get crispy, finish it off in here with a 10 type hot sauce.
00:06:48.000 in here with a 10-tip hot sauce.
00:06:50.000 And Bailey, when you try it, you're gonna be like, that's actually fire.
00:06:53.000 You're like, yeah, no. Not fire in the spicy way, fire in the good way.
00:06:57.000 Need black pepper. Find me black pepper.
00:06:59.000 Is it gonna kill me? Nah, bro.
00:07:04.000 Make it stronger. That looks interesting.
00:07:11.000 You're the independent adjudicator.
00:07:17.000 It's actually amazing. It's fine.
00:07:18.000 It's actually fucking good. Is it really?
00:07:21.000 So good. You know what it needs?
00:07:24.000 What does it need? That hot sauce.
00:07:28.000 Like I said, the bread is interesting.
00:07:30.000 Where's the hot sauce? It's an amateur hour.
00:07:33.000 That's right. See? Load it up.
00:07:35.000 That's right. Morning.
00:07:39.000 Alright.
00:07:52.000 That's banging.
00:07:53.000 I told you! I told you!
00:07:55.000 Chicken with ten types of hot sauce people don't know!
00:07:58.000 Hot sauce on top!
00:07:59.000 And a whole fucking bottle of garlic powder!
00:08:01.000 Garlic makes you strong! And salt and black pepper and fucking tinned tomatoes and kidney beans!
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