Tate Speech - May 26, 2017


S2 E28 - EUROVISION

Hosted by
Andrew Tate Tristan Tate
Mentioned
Lucy Jones Dave I'm Fucking Bluetooths Bluetooth Lucy Lucy Jones Margate
S2 E27 - FACE IT WERE BOOZING S2 E29 - THE HATEFUL TATE SEASON 2 FUCK FINALE

Episode Stats


Length

7 minutes

Words per minute

114.21

Word count

828

Sentence count

89


Transcript

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Hosts, guests, and mentioned names generated with spaCy (en_core_web_sm), reconciled against Wikidata.
00:00:07.000 The morning of the Eurovision Song Contest, the reason we were in Ukraine, I found myself falling again, this time down a lovely escalator.
00:00:20.000 Lovely escalator.
00:00:27.000 This morning we decided to go to the shops to see if the boys wanted to buy anything offensive and expensive like a car or a plane.
00:00:38.000 I was personally on the lookout for a new face.
00:00:40.000 I've got my smartwatch I can't do quicker by pulling out my phone.
00:00:44.000 I've got an email.
00:00:45.000 Let me just check my email here.
00:00:49.000 What kind of prick?
00:00:51.000 Let's get your phone out and check your email.
00:00:57.000 Why?
00:00:57.000 Okay.
00:00:58.000 Can I do the bungee?
00:00:59.000 Buy the first one, right?
00:01:01.000 So I'm afraid to do a real one.
00:01:02.000 Enjoy yourself, dude.
00:01:04.000 So I'm going to boost.
00:01:19.000 Now we're bungieing.
00:01:20.000 You're just seeing cliffs and mountains and water, yeah?
00:01:25.000 This is actually genuinely scary.
00:01:28.000 Like, because I'm afraid of heights.
00:01:30.000 It's actually realistic enough for me to be consistently on edge.
00:01:35.000 You're a little bitch, yeah?
00:01:36.000 I'm reminding myself that I'm in a shopping mall.
00:01:38.000 You're a little bitch, yeah?
00:01:39.000 Because I am actually a bit afraid.
00:01:41.000 You're a little bitch.
00:01:51.000 Hands free, I'm so fucking rebellious.
00:02:15.000 Worked out the Bluetooth function in the Dr. Bluetooth.
00:02:19.000 So, Eurovision podcast is being streamed.
00:02:25.000 Apparently, Lucy is the fifth favourite, according to the bookies.
00:02:28.000 Obviously, massive competition from Italy and France.
00:02:32.000 Italy are looking very strong.
00:02:35.000 Basically, they've got a guy who's performing alongside an ape.
00:02:39.000 So, you can't compete with that.
00:02:54.000 But I have faith Lucy's gonna do it.
00:02:57.000 Strapper, man.
00:02:59.000 Strapping, man.
00:02:59.000 Well, that's pretty much.
00:03:05.000 The bar Andrew's at?
00:03:05.000 I need a taxi.
00:03:07.000 The bar, your phone.
00:03:08.000 What's the name of the bar Andrew's at?
00:03:10.000 Dave!
00:03:11.000 The name of the bar Andrew's at?
00:03:12.000 Sorry, man.
00:03:13.000 What's the name of the bar that Andrew's at?
00:03:15.000 Oh, sorry, mate.
00:03:15.000 I was catching up on my Eurovision podcast.
00:03:18.000 Via the Bluetooths via the doctor.
00:03:20.000 Why do you have I'm not walking around in fucking public with these they're not even fucking Bluetooth headphones They're called beats by drain not doctor Bluetooth and you don't beats by drain because they're fake and you bought them in Thailand for a fiver.
00:03:32.000 Tiny cramped my fucking style day clean this shit up Fucking Bluetooths any other day of the year that would have been a tragedy the death of the doctor Bluetooths but Today it didn't matter we were at Eurovision the atmosphere was infectious Completely buzzing, unique, nothing like it.
00:03:53.000 You know, even the water was going off.
00:03:58.000 Special, truly special.
00:04:01.000 Even Andrew got involved.
00:04:04.000 Very nice, I'm a little bit afraid.
00:04:10.000 It's bigger than I am.
00:04:14.000 Hi.
00:04:15.000 Hello, Eurovision.
00:04:17.000 Woohoo!
00:04:19.000 Sorry, I'm not really, okay.
00:04:23.000 Thumbs up all round because I was just minutes away from seeing Lucy Jones Dave I'm not queuing so you can go to Eurovision Village.
00:04:37.000 I'm not doing it.
00:04:38.000 Yeah, but the Lucy Jones performance is going to be streamed live on the tour TV and the size of these lines I don't give a fuck mate I'm not waiting this night.
00:04:46.000 There's no way on earth I'm waiting in no way in hell to watch you lose the bet on Eurovision.
00:04:54.000 The TVs are going to be the TVs are on in there Big screen.
00:04:57.000 Yeah.
00:04:57.000 And you know what?
00:04:58.000 If these lines were full of potties, I'd be tempted.
00:05:00.000 There's a bunch of fucking dudes and middle-aged women.
00:05:02.000 I thought it'd be filled with like hot chicks.
00:05:04.000 But that is Eurovision Village.
00:05:06.000 I don't give a fuck what it is.
00:05:08.000 It's cold, it's raining, and it's a fucking line.
00:05:11.000 We're going inside to get some booze.
00:05:13.000 Yeah, we're going somewhere we can booze.
00:05:15.000 We can find some booze.
00:05:16.000 It's a boozing area.
00:05:17.000 Yo.
00:05:17.000 That looks like booze.
00:05:19.000 Booze, yeah.
00:05:19.000 There's booze over here.
00:05:20.000 There's booze here.
00:05:21.000 Like, Lucy's going to be on soon.
00:05:23.000 Mate, we're not going to fucking Eurovision.
00:05:25.000 The queue is massive.
00:05:26.000 I didn't buy tickets to the actual concert hall because they were ridiculously expensive.
00:05:31.000 I'm not going to pay you to do that.
00:05:33.000 I paid enough for your shit.
00:05:34.000 Does he even have any money?
00:05:35.000 No, he has no money.
00:05:36.000 The queue is like four hours long.
00:05:39.000 We'll go to a bar with a TV if you really want to watch it.
00:05:41.000 I really do want to watch it, yeah.
00:05:43.000 I'm missing a party in Margate for this.
00:05:46.000 Eurovision's fake news.
00:05:49.000 Dave.
00:05:50.000 What the hell are you doing?
00:05:53.000 At the Eurovision.
00:05:56.000 Down the road.
00:05:57.000 You've got to sign the ring if you want.
00:06:02.000 I'm booting.
00:06:11.000 Just look at the phone, don't be glad.
00:06:14.000 Don't she know what's my name again?
00:06:21.000 Wake through, they break.
00:06:42.000 So this was my alternative to Eurovision a bloke banging a neon drum an attractive belly dancer and a she-sha Tristan made friends at least they're having a laugh Andrew didn't my thoughts of course were with Lucy Lucy Jones
00:07:14.000 We came fucking 15th.