The Comment Section with Drew Afualo - DE-CENTER MEN Ft. Margaret Cho

00:00:00.000 they refuse to acknowledge racism or systemic oppression so bad they start making merch

00:00:04.460 yeah they're like guys we got to do something let's all make let's all make our own flags

00:00:08.140 yeah you do a blue one i'll do a red one we'll do firefighters cops what the fuck are we doing

00:00:12.780 what what are we doing why

00:00:14.560 hey everyone and welcome back to another episode of the comment section show starring me your fave

00:00:24.700 everybody knows me who cares about me on to the guests today we have the iconic the legendary

00:00:29.540 the amazing margaret cho thank you oh my gosh thank you welcome to the show it's an honor thank

00:00:37.400 you i'm obsessed with you same literally so exciting same i've had like a few uh like comedy

00:00:44.060 legends on my show every time and obviously you're one of them as well every time i have them i always

00:00:48.060 find it so shocking that you guys even know who i am i rely on you you know to deal with all of the

00:00:53.480 shit out there like i just i need i need you we need you i need you honestly i feel like women

00:01:00.520 like yourself honestly paved the way for people like me so i'm honored to follow in your very very

00:01:04.520 large footsteps i'm so grateful thank you amazing i'm so happy to have you for those of you who don't

00:01:10.040 know maybe live under a rock for the last however many years margaret cho is an esteemed and very

00:01:14.360 talented and very successful comedian which is so incredible and amazing and also i know you do like

00:01:18.900 tv film all of that jazz yeah what are you up to nowadays i'm on tour i'm on a um i'm the sort of

00:01:25.340 long tour i've been gone on it for about a year now and just like traveling and different places and

00:01:30.000 it's called live and livid and it's uh really a one woman effort to protect drag queens to protect the

00:01:35.900 trans community period to protect uh trans kids and i love the video that you made calling out turfs

00:01:42.420 against dylan yeah dylan is my baby girl i love her to death she's my little baby girl and like

00:01:48.960 truly an angel like she's so sweet she's the baby like and she put out this beautiful song that's

00:01:54.860 really just about celebrating her womanhood yeah and who she is you were so funny like bitch it's not

00:02:01.140 about like you know this is one definition of womanhood and that these women are trying to somehow

00:02:05.940 say well uh if you think trivialize womanhood like that like it's not trivializing womanhood it's

00:02:11.840 expanding the idea of womanhood yeah and that's also her womanhood yeah like that's how that was

00:02:17.040 her experience which was like my whole point i'm like nobody gives a shit if you don't like the song

00:02:21.420 like believe it or not not all art is created for you specifically so it's okay if you don't like it

00:02:26.500 who gives a shit about that but i was really getting irritated because i started seeing a lot of

00:02:31.000 cis women yeah um saying things like this is misogynistic which i'm like you

00:02:35.140 use that term too loosely with this shit like i don't like that i mean it's like no this is not

00:02:40.880 misogyny this is actually celebration absolutely femininity yeah and i and i even followed it up

00:02:46.760 too in like other videos where because they were like well it's more so about the stereotypes or

00:02:51.080 whatever the fuck they were their reasoning was for being a turf and i was like okay well okay let's

00:02:56.100 talk about stereotypes she talks about like picking up her meds which by the way are her hormones so

00:03:00.320 you're a fucking asshole if you're like not everyone takes those no shit bitch she knows that

00:03:04.920 believe it or not having a one-night stand shopping whatever what is wrong with any of

00:03:09.260 those things if women do any of those things what's wrong with that and i was like now who's

00:03:13.760 being misogynistic right exactly like so women can only do things like bear children yeah yeah have

00:03:19.740 a period yeah but the dumb thing of like playing the her song with that stony stupid

00:03:25.660 like these bitches with their stone faces like mad at the camp like mad like like fucking oh fuck you

00:03:33.880 knock it off knock it off you're pissing me off it's so stupid and i hate when women are stupid like i

00:03:39.760 expect that from men we expect it from men all day but when women are stupid it's particularly

00:03:45.840 infuriating same literally you're just like me for real i've told people i'm like like you said you

00:03:50.640 expect that from men yeah it's shocking when they're not to be honest yeah they're not fucking

00:03:54.500 dumb when women are are actively being dumb and wielding it i'm like girl what is going on with

00:04:00.080 you like i was like it makes me extra angry yeah honestly like it makes me more mad than men because

00:04:04.760 like you said because men are a big joke to me regardless always so i'm gonna laugh at anything

00:04:08.480 they say but like that's how i felt too about the whole discourse because it was really really upsetting

00:04:13.320 me seeing so many women and that's when i said like this is where intersectionality really starts to

00:04:17.340 beat the shit out of some of you who claim to be feminist because it's like feminist with an

00:04:21.020 asterisk and i was like that's not true feminism if it's not intersectional so it has to include

00:04:25.980 trans women as well right and i was like and any other sort of intersection that could be like being

00:04:30.840 able-bodied being neurodivergent being gay being fat like those are all different intersections that

00:04:36.460 should all be included in your feminism that's right and i feel like they'll just look for any

00:04:40.460 opportunity to attack dylan to be honest which i don't know what it is yeah i don't know what it is

00:04:45.600 about her or her karma that sort of attracts that but i mean maybe it's it's also good because it

00:04:52.180 brings to light all of the biases that people have totally and i'm glad for it but i think it's got

00:04:57.780 to be hard for her she's just a baby and turfs are so like they're so convicted that in their belief

00:05:03.520 that they are not like transphobic and they are not being misogynist which is like that's what makes

00:05:08.200 it a little harder because it's like i can't convince you to give a shit about women who may not

00:05:14.140 perceive you may not perceive them to be what you think a woman is like i can't convince you to see

00:05:18.540 them that way so it's like i'm really just arguing with a brick wall at that point yeah so i've always

00:05:23.260 told women too i'm like i don't give a fuck if you love me if you don't love trans women unlove me

00:05:28.940 unfollow me sorry bye yeah don't want you around girl yeah that makes me really happy that your tour is

00:05:34.380 centering on it's centering on trans lives and um trying to talk about the ridiculousness of this

00:05:41.580 evangelical christian movement to erase us to erase gayness and women's rights and all of that

00:05:48.680 you know because um the person that would have the biggest problem with these evangelical christians

00:05:53.320 is christ yeah christ would be like bitch that's not what i said isn't that ironic that's so ironic

00:05:59.940 also too like when they say like you it's like a sin to take the lord's name in vain or whatever i'm

00:06:04.960 like also don't come for me if i misquoted that i don't know a lot about your culture but like

00:06:08.520 if they when they say the lord's name in vain people think when you're growing up it's like

00:06:12.740 saying oh my god or whatever or saying jesus christ when in fact what it really means is

00:06:16.980 using the lord's teachings to be bigoted towards other people and i'm like isn't that ironic because

00:06:22.580 that's all you fucking do when you're in it's right it's like ray it's that that irony they're like

00:06:30.440 so trying to use god's name to stamp out god's creation period and how does and how does that

00:06:37.800 work it's so infuriating yeah it is and i feel especially now like with all the anti-trans

00:06:43.740 legislation that's going on right now it's extremely extremely important that's why i felt compelled to

00:06:49.060 mention that in the video about dylan i'm like this is not the take y'all think it is and like

00:06:53.600 targeting trans women especially now it's a horrible horrible evil sinister thing to do

00:06:59.460 yeah um when they need us more than ever right now they always have and also about the drag queen

00:07:04.440 band i've talked about that too because i have tons of drag queens on my show too whom i love and adore

00:07:07.900 and i was like you know the drag queen band thing is also a masquerade for wanting to wipe out trans

00:07:13.600 people obviously it's like a front but when they're talking about like you know they they're being

00:07:18.220 creepy towards kids or whatever the fuck their rhetoric is i'm like drag queens hate children right you

00:07:23.240 have a lot of drag friends well drag queens don't want anything to do with they want drugs and dick like

00:07:27.740 everybody else like we don't need children and it's like what is that about i don't know they're

00:07:34.540 like i prefer that your children aren't near me i like ask that you don't bring them near me actually

00:07:39.460 no and also you you know because obviously you've been in the community for a long time so i'm sure

00:07:44.580 you have tons of friends and now i have so many friends too and they're all like i don't like leave

00:07:48.820 us the fuck alone like they're not bothering anyone they don't want to hang out with you no they don't

00:07:52.840 want to hang out with your kids they just want to do their dance and go home right but it's this

00:07:57.540 weird idea that drag or somehow drag queens are going to teach your children to be gay or that

00:08:03.280 there are teaching kids to be gay in school when they're talking about gay history or yeah that's

00:08:09.640 not real that's none of that is real if that were the case there would be no gay people because we're

00:08:15.300 constantly in a heteronormative society anyways so straightness is constantly pushed on all of us

00:08:20.280 and taught yeah and taught actively pushed onto us absolutely so there would be no gay people if

00:08:26.080 that was how it worked like gay people wouldn't exist at all if we were just all being taught the

00:08:30.120 same shit we were just choosing yeah so i honestly find that very inspiring that it makes me really

00:08:35.160 happy obviously i know like because it's been such a targeted attack on them recently like what was

00:08:39.760 really the driving force behind wanting to build your tour around that i think it's just like uh what i've

00:08:46.620 always done i mean i was always talked about gay rights and i think after 2015 when the supreme court

00:08:52.640 allowed gay people to get married yeah there was this shift of like maybe we don't have to fight so

00:08:57.420 hard yeah for our rights anymore and then uh when roe v wade was overturned and then you started to see

00:09:05.120 like all of this rise of homophobic stuff and the patriotic front coming out and like protesting drag queen

00:09:11.960 story hours and all of this and i realized oh we actually are going backwards yeah and we need to

00:09:17.440 step step up this fight yeah absolutely and when it comes to your comedy specifically i'm so curious

00:09:24.400 like if you've seen a shift at all other than obviously politically i think because obviously

00:09:29.640 stand-up comics i'm sure you've seen especially on the internet there's been a real like discourse

00:09:34.160 happening about like what you can joke about what you can't joke about like what's appropriate what's

00:09:38.620 not and like some people who refuse to like take bigotry out of their comedy anymore because they're

00:09:43.640 just like oh everyone gets offended these days uh people who like refuse to adapt or evolve with time

00:09:49.940 i'm so curious if you've seen like a shift in comedy at all as far as like the internet comes into play

00:09:54.740 obviously people are talking about it online all the time like have you seen a big shift in the comedy

00:09:59.140 space only the men are mad only the men are like you can't say anything i'm not gonna play a college

00:10:05.940 camp like they're like oh man i'm like why are you mad the thing is is that if you're really a good

00:10:12.520 comedian you can uh subvert all of these ideas of what's possible totally to say you know you if you

00:10:20.500 really uh were skilled then you wouldn't have to rely on you know racism bigotry yeah homophobia

00:10:28.060 misogyny to get your point across exactly like there is a way to tell a well-crafted joke that

00:10:35.880 is all about this stuff yeah but they're not taking the time to do it exactly that's so real

00:10:41.400 too i'm so glad you said that because i feel like it's such a cheap like summary of it they're like

00:10:46.180 oh i guess i just can never talk about that and it's like no you could talk about anything i think

00:10:50.160 there's just a way you can do it that doesn't always have to end with it being denigrating towards

00:10:54.640 a marginalized group that you yourself are not a part of right that's the like the real tea is like

00:10:59.780 it's always people outside of the community punching down on the community whereas like

00:11:03.680 even people within the community they joke about their own community all the time in a way that's

00:11:08.420 not denigrating or harmful no it's like a weird weird thing of like let's actually just expose the

00:11:14.680 racism by making the racist joke like that to me i think is a really important part of people of color

00:11:20.200 and comedy for people in comedy women in comedy it's a it's a really important way to explode all of

00:11:26.700 these ideas of who we are yeah and politicize it by joking about it there's a power in that so you

00:11:33.240 know men have the ability to do it but they're just so lazy they don't want to do all the things

00:11:39.400 that make it possible yeah i always think how boring too like you've been in the space for how

00:11:43.880 long and like you can't work those jokes out like or get new ones like just evolve and grow other

00:11:49.540 everyone else is doing it why i'm like so other people don't seem to be having the problem that

00:11:53.540 you're having right there are some really successful comedians right now that are not having that problem

00:11:57.840 at all they're like well no i can't write any jokes if i can't joke about gay people and i'm not gay

00:12:02.220 then what do i have yeah maybe you're not that funny yeah it's like they just have to really like

00:12:07.460 actually find a way to do it and look at the the art form itself yeah or ways to do it totally

00:12:13.380 obviously you are such a figurehead for women in comedy and as a woman of color um like how was that

00:12:19.560 like coming up in the space in the beginning and like have you seen like do you think that there's a

00:12:24.760 a shift in a more positive direction for women of color in comedy yeah it's wonderful because

00:12:30.320 there's so many great spaces for women in comedy there's so many great uh voices that we're seeing

00:12:36.580 so i think that the rise of it is really inspiring because before you know there was no there were no

00:12:43.420 asian women in comedy you know when i was starting in the 80s and 90s there was just nobody yeah so it

00:12:49.640 was isolating and lonely and i was always just like trying to figure out am i even supposed to do

00:12:55.260 this but now there's so many more channels for them to get their word workout and so yeah it's

00:13:01.560 really inspiring that's so cool and i'm curious how did you like find out that you wanted to do comedy

00:13:06.980 because obviously it's a very niche like passion to pursue as like a career so i'm curious how did you

00:13:11.760 like find that as soon as i knew what it was as a job then i thought oh that's what i'm gonna do

00:13:17.260 like and i decided when i was probably like eight years old really you know and i know yeah like

00:13:22.820 really early like that i mean so early that i thought oh i wanted to be wonder woman and then

00:13:29.400 i realized like that's probably not gonna happen so that i thought i might not be in the cards yeah

00:13:34.900 i'm gonna be a comedian and that was like yeah from seven to eight that was my switch damn that's so

00:13:40.440 cool from such a young age i feel like even when i was younger i knew i just because sometimes people

00:13:44.720 ask me like did you always know you wanted to like you know be in comedy or whatever or be funny

00:13:49.140 for a living and i was like i just liked entertaining i liked i liked making people laugh i like make

00:13:53.620 people like to entertain whatever that may be um i just always enjoyed that i just never thought it

00:13:58.720 would lead to this i will say though i'm dipping my toe in stand-up this year i'm like getting a little

00:14:03.660 getting my my warm-ups in perfect i'm gonna start with five well you know you're so good you're so

00:14:10.920 good you're already there i'm so nervous i i'm not even kidding i'm super nervous i tell all my

00:14:16.080 stand-up friends and they're like why and i'm like i don't know i just feel like i've loved stand-up

00:14:20.140 comedy for so long like it's it's an art form i just truly admire and respect and i always joke i

00:14:25.100 don't want to find out the hard way that i'm bad at it no you're great you already you already know

00:14:28.960 you're good it's like you're already you're so advanced that when you go in you'll feel it like oh

00:14:34.240 this is that's what it is like the physical act of doing it will be a comfort a good feeling

00:14:39.620 yeah because you'll know oh it's this is what it is because it's very natural from the way that you

00:14:43.680 speak and then all of your all the stuff that i've seen of you already you know it's like oh

00:14:48.820 you already do it like i assumed that you've been doing comedy for years like i just yeah i already

00:14:55.180 assumed that you were just already up there and doing sets because that that's what you're doing

00:14:59.840 essentially when you're making these tiktoks and you're uh like editing and stopping when you're like

00:15:04.620 i love when you're like then you cut off and then you go to the next burn and the next one

00:15:10.480 you're making the laugh break for the audience so you're already feeling in the audience laughter

00:15:15.140 yeah but you're already doing it in the way that you're putting the jokes out there so it'll be

00:15:20.620 natural for you to do that when you go on stage oh my gosh don't gas me too much margaret well it's

00:15:25.740 like she said i was awesome so i'm sure i'm gonna kill it you are gonna kill it you are gonna kill it

00:15:30.820 it's gonna be great i just never wanted to be like one of those like dickhead dudes on the internet

00:15:35.560 and they tell like one fat joke and they're like i should quit my job and do stand-up for a living

00:15:39.400 no no no no nothing like that nothing like that i'll come with you oh period i'll help you out like

00:15:45.780 i'll say okay you know we'll we'll we'll work together on this because i i really want to help

00:15:50.260 you because i think you're already you're a natural thank you thank you so much i'll take all

00:15:54.440 please don't say things you don't mean because i will take you no i mean it i'll come with you and we

00:15:58.560 can go we can go to like the comedy store and we can figure it out period i'm so excited oh my gosh

00:16:03.040 me getting nervous my back started sweating um i feel like i just like i said i admire it so much

00:16:08.100 but especially women in comedy like i'm just like that's so powerful to me and i feel like the ones

00:16:12.440 that i admire yourself included i'm like oh i just like don't know if i could ever like live up to that

00:16:17.420 also it's all original material which i'm not saying that i don't have original material but i feel like

00:16:21.760 i'm like me making fun of dudes and like crafting an entire set are obviously two different skill sets

00:16:26.920 they can one can help the other but i just like want to make sure i'm like perfect and ready to go

00:16:32.720 but that's probably the virgo in me well yeah the thing is is that it doesn't have to be perfect

00:16:37.120 because the perfection is in the motion of doing it true the perfection is in the creation and uh to

00:16:44.360 let go of this idea of perfectionism as like it's the enemy of the good yeah perfect perfect is the

00:16:51.740 enemy of the good you know you want to get rid of this idea of like it has to be perfect because

00:16:56.340 you're already perfect oh thank you so much margaret choe i really appreciate that coming

00:17:00.820 from you that means a lot to me and i'm very nervous i'm sure it'll be fine i'm like if i'm

00:17:05.800 like worse comes to worse i'll just pick a man in the audience start making fun of him that's my

00:17:09.900 backup plan that's the best you know what i'm an audible genius that's what everybody wants to see

00:17:16.560 anyway so i mean i think yeah don't worry don't worry too much about it we'll go and we'll do it and

00:17:23.720 you'll see how the transition of you taking it from online to irl it's really going to be simple

00:17:31.620 oh okay that makes me feel a little bit less nervous about it for sure ontario the wait is over the gold

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00:18:37.760 when it comes to online to real life and obviously i made a joke about men like they like truly think

00:18:43.720 like if they make a couple bigoted jokes fire them off on tiktok they're like i should do comedy

00:18:48.800 i'm so funny guys everybody tells me tell a joke tell a joke and i feel like i'm curious if you've seen

00:18:54.800 that i don't know i always see it on tiktok but obvious obviously i'm getting tagged in the shit but

00:18:58.980 like i don't know if you've seen an uptick because i feel like i have and young men specifically who

00:19:03.400 are like i should definitely tell jokes for a living you know once they get into it they see how hard

00:19:09.840 it is yeah that's what i was gonna say because it's not it's not one joke it's not even like uh

00:19:15.540 just somebody that's funny doing it it's a mindset yeah it's like the mindset of like coming at things

00:19:21.340 like a machine gun like when you're like going and doing stand-up you have to have joke after joke

00:19:24.780 which you do yeah so that's like you already have that mechanism in place yeah that's what's hard to

00:19:30.940 get so a lot of those guys who sort of maybe think oh i'm really good and then they'll go and do it

00:19:36.700 it's impossible a lot of times in comedy you don't have to be funny you just have to have people

00:19:43.560 come see you oh period and that's that's a good point that's what's real yeah like that's why you

00:19:50.140 have a lot of people go and do comedy that aren't necessarily comedians yeah and they sell out and

00:19:56.420 they get specials huge things yeah they get specials they get huge billboards that you know

00:20:01.740 out there that they're not funny at all but people are coming that's the other important part

00:20:07.500 when you can marry the idea of having that rapid fire of jokes and people come see you which you

00:20:13.840 have both you got it thank you i know i feel like when especially when you're talking about that like

00:20:19.280 one of my uh friends caleb heron like he's gay he's a comic he's hilarious so funny so talented and

00:20:25.380 he even when he was telling me about giving me some advice about stand-up too he was telling me

00:20:29.660 he's like i feel like uh men who struggle like that or men who have audiences and they're maybe

00:20:33.760 not that funny he's like i think they just refuse to like change the set at all he's like so like

00:20:38.940 when you work a set and you know some things hit some things don't like you should listen as if it's

00:20:45.000 a conversation if they're not reacting to it then maybe i need to tweak it maybe i need to exit it

00:20:49.800 get rid of it entirely and he's like like that's the the art form is like adapting it right so that

00:20:55.220 people enjoy it and laugh and everything and he has some of them just refuse to change it like

00:20:59.420 they're like this is funny i don't give a fuck what you say i'm gonna tell the jokes regardless

00:21:03.680 and then he was like and those are comics i don't think are like as deserving of praise or anything

00:21:08.500 because they just refuse to change the shit and then they end up building an online fan base and

00:21:12.800 then just fill the seats with those people so then it doesn't matter anymore like you said

00:21:15.720 yeah i mean it's like about growing and understanding that a stand-up comedy is a living breathing art form

00:21:22.760 and it also grows with society totally so society's ideas about what they think is appropriate or

00:21:28.840 funny or whatever yeah and you know all that changes with time so you know you're allowed to

00:21:33.880 be adapting along with it and to be to not take it personally when things are not going well yeah

00:21:40.220 totally and he even uh compared it to like having a conversation with someone like he's like if i was

00:21:44.820 talking to you and i brought up politics and you weren't responding to me at all i'm not going to

00:21:48.660 talk about politics i'm going to move on to something else we want to we both want to talk about

00:21:51.760 right and he's like that's how i see it with audiences like if they're not responding at all then

00:21:55.960 maybe i need to shift it or move on entirely yeah and there's nothing wrong with that like i can

00:22:00.480 change it and adapt it as it grows but i think that's probably why both of you are so successful

00:22:04.960 because you y'all are smarter than most men who do stand up for a living i've actually made fun of a

00:22:10.840 a guy who got a special for no fucking reason apparently but i had like made i made a video

00:22:16.140 making fun of him because i was like the entire set was absolute dog shit i didn't even watch the

00:22:20.900 special i was just getting tagged in the tiktok clips from it and when i talked about it i was like

00:22:25.960 i mean the entire thing was nothing but like minion memes you would find on like your racist

00:22:30.840 uncle's facebook page so like that's not comedy to me personally but like what the fuck would i know

00:22:36.440 because he like made fun of women almost the entire time and he was like yeah fuck women they're so

00:22:40.460 stupid oh and women were his primary fan base which is so weird that's like so why i i don't know but

00:22:48.100 again it's like that thing of like you don't have to be funny if you're a comedian as long as people

00:22:52.800 are coming to see you period that's like you think that's good i don't understand why like

00:22:57.840 especially if you're skating like that like if women just find you attractive and so then they're

00:23:02.000 putting you they're putting you in the right spaces which is like to get an entire special or to get on

00:23:06.820 these these lists or these carpets or what the fuck ever you get all this celebrity from them

00:23:10.640 i don't know why you would sell them down the river like that yeah like you must lift them up yeah

00:23:15.760 like if they're at least pretend publicly pretend i don't know but i mean as long as people are

00:23:21.200 coming to see him then he's going to continue to be a big name in comedy you know it's like there's

00:23:26.580 been a past examples of that yeah you know but the thing about it is that their fame doesn't

00:23:31.960 necessarily last you know they're they what thing uh that has a lot of longevity and has legs is when

00:23:39.240 you're really funny and you you know you can continually bring people in but totally what's more

00:23:44.180 important is to be funny and i also think too like i i feel like as like i grew on social media i

00:23:49.680 started noticing too like your what your audience demographic looks like i feel like is also very

00:23:56.140 indicative of especially if you're in comedy if you're like funny or not like does everybody look

00:24:01.020 exactly the same or is everybody very diverse because like my demographic is so so so massive and

00:24:06.780 diverse there's many different people of different ethnicities sizes ages right like sexuality

00:24:13.940 gender identities like all across the spectrum and if all of them many of which don't have

00:24:18.480 anything in common all find me funny i find that to be a great thing yeah but then when you build an

00:24:23.620 audience based off like it's like jokes for one specific group of people i just don't know how you

00:24:28.260 see that going yeah down the line oh how does that even like sustain sustain or have the same kind

00:24:35.440 of value or impact no totally yeah and i feel like especially with you like i always remember too like

00:24:41.380 how heavily involved you've been in like the lgbtqia plus community and like how you've been

00:24:45.520 so like just like steadfast and uplifting them and empowering them and i really want to say that

00:24:51.400 before i forget um how much i admire that about you because you've held that your entire time yeah in

00:24:56.460 the industry especially when it was really really fucking taboo to do that or to be open and honest

00:25:01.600 about it yeah and i feel like especially now we need more people who have been like in the game for a

00:25:07.140 wild to be more upfront about things like that it's almost like when i had um trace lysette when

00:25:11.940 she was on my show when i had her on she was like if just one huge like straight male celebrity was

00:25:18.460 like yeah i fuck with the dolls yeah i fuck with trans girls she goes it would change everything that's

00:25:24.460 right the way acceptance would just ripple through like the community is insane absolutely and so i feel

00:25:30.600 like people like you have always been right beside them like constantly like being like we need to

00:25:35.160 platform then we need to pay attention to this we need to care right um i just admire you for that

00:25:39.000 thank you especially with the dolls i fuck with the doll and i love i love tracy i love tracy and i

00:25:45.100 think she's just so magnificent she is so cool she's amazing she's definitely one of my heroes i love her

00:25:51.280 to death and it's like it's so important i feel like as especially as women to like stick together

00:25:56.520 which is another reason why i got so pissed off about dylan because i was like look how much time we

00:26:00.300 waste yeah tearing each other down like yeah look how much further ahead men get when we do this shit

00:26:04.700 this is what they want they want us to turn on each other right like they want us to turn against

00:26:09.200 each other and that's that way we're divided because we outnumber them and we're stronger than

00:26:13.340 them and we've been turning on each other for so long for real we continually continually backstab

00:26:20.460 and turn on each other and that's their weapon exactly because they can appear blameless it's the

00:26:26.520 strongest one i feel and i and even with my platform i've like i've had people ask me before like oh

00:26:31.640 can you make fun of like you know bigoted women because they do exist and they're on the internet

00:26:36.120 too and they make awful videos too not nearly as many as men but they are there and so i've had

00:26:41.100 people ask me like oh can you you know make fun of women too and i've always told people no i'm not

00:26:46.180 going to do that and i was like that doesn't mean i support or like want to amplify what it is they're

00:26:51.220 doing because i don't and i don't support them and i was like but at the same time like first of all

00:26:55.620 i don't do anything a man tells me to do but second of all i was like i uh truly believe that

00:27:01.220 misogyny works in very sinister evil and sometimes hidden ways and one of them is uh turning us

00:27:07.080 against each other so it's like making us believe that there can only ever be one perfect version

00:27:11.360 of a woman and if you don't fit into that it's my job to like kick you off the mountain before you

00:27:16.120 get to the top so i was like i don't believe in that kind of rhetoric i don't think it helps anything

00:27:21.680 no um for me to like make fun of women does that mean i'm not going to hold them accountable

00:27:25.300 publicly no but i'm also not gonna um drag them the same way i drag men right and i was like because

00:27:30.880 men have been making fun of our looks forever so i don't need to add to that no they continue to do

00:27:35.660 it now so like i don't need to i don't need to fan those things they don't need my fucking help

00:27:39.540 no it's like when people say the devil's advocate they're like the devil doesn't need an advocate

00:27:43.300 no he does a great job all on his own he doesn't need your help that's so true like i'm so sick

00:27:48.280 of like that like let's hear the other side i don't care no i don't care actually no i don't

00:27:54.120 want to i don't care i don't want to play the devil's out i don't need the devil's advocate i

00:27:57.780 don't need it it's actually i'm good i'm actually really fucking okay i don't need it i've made that

00:28:02.340 joke before about men who are like well invite me on your show so we can debate no no actually in

00:28:08.800 fact i won't be doing that no why i'm like you want to talk shit get your own show that's what i

00:28:13.120 why platform them with their stupid shit exactly like it's like it doesn't that's like so much of

00:28:19.100 this stuff like doesn't even dignify a response exactly absolutely and i'm like well also blatant

00:28:25.120 outright bigotry like what am i gonna let you sit here and talk more i don't want to hear it i don't

00:28:30.460 hear that shit and i'm not going to convince you otherwise and you're not going to convince me so

00:28:33.540 it's a waste of everybody's time there's no reason to want to argue with them no absolutely not and

00:28:38.520 it's ironic too because i feel like this plays into like male validation and how much they value

00:28:44.580 social currency with each other because they constantly feel the need to be like proven right

00:28:48.840 or like the strongest or or the smartest or whatever the fuck adjective they want to use and i was like

00:28:54.940 see i don't have that so if you tell me that makes me a chicken shit because i don't want to debate you

00:29:00.260 okay yeah it's fine i was like it's funny because i don't give a fuck you do yeah it's like it doesn't

00:29:05.140 mean anything i don't i don't care if you think i'm a bitch about that because i'm never going to

00:29:09.420 see you talk to you or even care if you die so yeah it doesn't matter it doesn't matter i was like

00:29:14.960 it's like no sweat off my back at all because i don't need that validation you do right and that's

00:29:21.320 why i've told uh women who follow me i'm like you really want to get under some a man's skin you just

00:29:25.380 laugh yeah don't care honestly if you don't care at all and you give it no stock that's what they

00:29:30.640 hate nothing bothers them they hate it so much they really do and i've had someone ask me like

00:29:36.560 um how do i stop like getting emotional when i'm trying to like stand up for myself like against

00:29:41.380 men because she said like i i have all these very strong feelings and sometimes when i confront them

00:29:46.260 i get very emotional and like i don't want to be emotional in front of them because i feel like it

00:29:50.460 makes them be like oh see now you're fucking crying whatever and so i was like well first of all

00:29:53.900 being emotional is not a bad thing men have stigmatized it to be a bad thing and a woman thing it's not

00:29:57.860 and also anger is also an emotion which they tend to forget very often yeah it's honestly the worst

00:30:02.900 one right so um and they weaponize that shit all the time and i told her but if you're getting to

00:30:09.060 the point where you you feel like you're crying because you're trying to like you know debate with

00:30:12.500 them or whatever i said first of all i would and i mean this with all the love in the world i would

00:30:15.680 unpack where you get your validation from because i used to get like that when i was younger and i was

00:30:20.760 like and i realized now after unpacking all my internalized misogyny that like i was looking for them

00:30:26.340 to validate me still even at the very very bottom of it like i was like i just wanted them to see me

00:30:30.780 i wanted them to hear me i wanted them to believe me when i was telling them how it feels when they

00:30:35.520 act a certain way or treat me a certain way or whatever and i was like so that's still me looking

00:30:39.720 for validation for them and i said but i don't need it from them like i only need it from me yeah people

00:30:45.100 who matter so like clearly that's not them no so and i said once i let that go i don't cry anymore

00:30:51.720 yeah no way yeah just laugh i'm sure you do too that's the thing they fear the most yeah you know

00:30:57.320 like when they say like what are like men are most afraid of us laughing at them and then we're most

00:31:01.540 afraid of them killing us yeah weird how that works out like what real similar in weight i guess so

00:31:07.880 weird yeah and i i've said that we have much different priorities like in that sense especially

00:31:12.760 that's why i'm like once you take their power away from like it harming you or feeling like that

00:31:17.560 they have literally nothing left that's right and that's what they fear the most other than being

00:31:22.020 laughed at is like women not needing them at all the apathy yeah apathy is the biggest weapon that

00:31:28.700 we have and it's one to to invest in and also speaking of but not really like getting hate and

00:31:34.600 stuff obviously i know you've been in a male dominated field for a while so i'm curious like

00:31:38.800 how it was dealing with that kind of like with misogyny or just hate in general when you were coming

00:31:43.540 up in the you know i think like it was easier for me because initially uh i came up before the

00:31:49.820 internet so a lot of that was really um i missed out on a lot of it i used to get like stalkers so

00:31:56.680 there's one stalker who used to like put uh stuff in my mailbox that was all diet ads like he would

00:32:04.220 for years diet ads telling you to yeah and like um you know different diet pills and like uh he would

00:32:12.420 just like right i'm assuming it's a man yeah because i don't know who it was from yeah but

00:32:16.740 didn't that you know so when i moved it stopped happening but it was just like this weird thing

00:32:20.480 of like he just for years could send me like diet pills and diet ads and things like that and it was

00:32:25.360 just like a way his way of like telling you to lose weight yeah but just to be like shitty but it was

00:32:29.920 coming to my house so that was really scary that is so weird it was weird and then like in the very

00:32:35.860 beginning of the internet i didn't know how to use it so i didn't know where the comments were

00:32:41.260 i wasn't entirely sure that's a great thing i miss out a lot of on a lot of it and i think like after

00:32:47.240 a while you know like you kind of i don't know you sort of get used to it like now i think i just don't

00:32:54.340 look at it yeah like i'm just not it doesn't mean enough to go looking for it it's something that i

00:32:58.800 look for or even think about i feel like obviously this is very obvious to me but you have a really

00:33:03.620 strong sense of self so it's like even if you did see it's kind of like okay i have like maybe

00:33:08.660 developed that also like just because i've i've never been like a pretty girl i've never been like

00:33:14.720 one of those kinds of girls so i never learned to value that period yeah so it's like something that

00:33:21.720 but you are beautiful thank you you're beautiful i love you but it's um it's something that i just

00:33:26.760 never looked to have any kind of sense of self and stock totally totally so any comments but my

00:33:33.600 look sort of was like oh well that's i've always been called ugly i've always been called awkward

00:33:37.760 i've always been called whatever yeah you're just like okay you know it doesn't it doesn't have any

00:33:42.560 importance to me yeah it doesn't hold any weight at all yeah i feel like i've talked about that too a

00:33:47.320 lot on my pop because obviously like my platform is one of the few i think that's like

00:33:51.940 like solely comprised of hate like it's like built off the shoulders of hate that's like about me

00:33:58.080 personally or just women in general or anyone that's not a cis straight white man and so i feel

00:34:04.700 i get that question a lot about how to deal with that and i've said the same almost the exact same

00:34:08.520 thing about like first of all male validation means dog shit to me it doesn't mean anything at all in

00:34:13.200 fact i don't want men to validate me i don't want men to even look at me so like never talk to me again

00:34:17.780 and i told people i'm like why do you think i'm trying to make all of them hate me like i'm trying

00:34:22.340 my absolute hardest and it's not working fast enough but i feel like with with dealing with

00:34:27.460 that kind of um vitriol about my looks and stuff i'm like i don't hold any stock in that because i

00:34:33.120 don't believe that's what makes me unique and awesome like those aren't things that i value the

00:34:38.300 most about myself like anything i value the most about myself where i draw my confidence from has

00:34:42.360 nothing to do with my looks like it has absolutely nothing to do with my looks it's everything

00:34:45.940 internally that i i feel like that makes me really confident so i've told people i think

00:34:50.860 that's a really really great way to start kind of unpacking where you value things like where

00:34:57.040 where you draw value from where you draw courage strength confidence from um it's a good way to

00:35:02.200 start is to kind of start uh talking about things or like complimenting yourself like i've told people

00:35:07.360 before i saw a creator a friend of mine um one time she said she did like a bowl of affirmations

00:35:12.960 and she wrote one um every day for herself but they had nothing to do with her looks yeah so

00:35:17.920 she would write something she loves about herself or something that makes her feel confident and had

00:35:20.740 nothing to do with looks and i was like those are really great exercises to start like devaluing

00:35:25.680 that i feel like in the same time i feel like in tandem you devalue or de-center men out of your

00:35:30.420 life entirely that's the key to de-center men and i think that's what i love about menopause

00:35:35.740 is that that's the ultimate de-centering i can only imagine it's so freeing totally because so

00:35:42.340 much of the hormonal drive i realized was really just about uh this compulsive heteronormative

00:35:50.020 attitude which i'm not even fully heterosexual so it's like a weird thing of like it's brainwashing

00:35:55.780 but it's helped along by this hormonal thing and so when that goes away then you can really fully

00:36:00.700 accept and enjoy who you are it's like taking drunk goggles off yeah you should take them off and

00:36:05.620 entirely absolutely something i wrote about this in my book too but like something that really helped

00:36:09.780 me with that um was my sister because my sister's a lesbian so like lesbians they don't give a fuck

00:36:15.960 about men yeah they do not care about them they they hate them more than i do so i feel like they're the

00:36:22.880 perfect um example of someone who like men mean literally nothing to them they don't want anything

00:36:28.020 from them they don't want to be them they don't want to attention from them they want literally nothing

00:36:32.500 from them at all um and so i feel like they're such a great example of it is possible to exist in a

00:36:38.940 patriarchal world and not hold male validation in any way shape or form like not hold it at all

00:36:43.880 and then you can start like really finding a true sense of self that's rooted in you and not in men

00:36:49.920 yes what they think of you it's decolonizing period and de-centering it's so important

00:36:55.840 absolutely that's where intersectional feminism comes in to play also fucking turfs anyways

00:37:01.720 but it's the laziness of the just like staring blankly into the camera and pissed off with her

00:37:08.080 song playing it's the laziness and then the the zoom the slow zoom is how stupid yeah that's what

00:37:15.860 makes me no i yeah no i love that dylan i love that you you made a song about stereotypes about us i was

00:37:21.200 like what are you fucking talking about and also i had i had someone come up my video and they were

00:37:25.520 like the song wasn't my favorite but that's just because i like different kinds of music and then

00:37:29.380 she was like but honestly when she described her week that is what my week looks like so that's the

00:37:34.640 most girlhood thing i've ever heard in my life so right it's so right and when i was talking to my

00:37:40.120 sister about it like when i was because obviously i had a bunch of fucking turfs be like i'm not a

00:37:44.480 fucking transphobe and i'm like you're not a transphobe but you're just you're spouting transphobic

00:37:48.960 rhetoric right okay looks like a duck talks right probably a fucking duck right uh but when i was

00:37:54.980 talking to my sister about it i was like what's crazy is this shit talking and this like awful of

00:38:00.760 like there's only one way to be a woman you're not a real woman you're not a this you're not a that

00:38:05.060 i was like this like all these women kind of turning on another woman that's the most girlhood

00:38:09.800 experience right there bitch right right there look at us tearing each other down while men are

00:38:13.860 getting ahead like that's yeah that right there is girlhood we're all experiencing it at the same

00:38:18.200 fucking time uh there was one that really made me mad it was a girl who was saying like you don't

00:38:22.840 have to worry dylan you don't have to worry about when you walk home if you're gonna get home yes

00:38:27.900 she does what trans women are always worried i know the exact video you're talking my sister showed

00:38:32.400 me that video right before i decided to make mine and i was like yeah i'm gonna make one now my sister

00:38:36.800 showed me that she goes when she said that she goes you're right it's worse it's actually a lot

00:38:40.800 worse for her it's a lot worse for it's a lot harder for her actually yeah like what the fuck like

00:38:45.700 are you fucking stupid like what a stupid thing to say you're so delusional i was like you're gonna

00:38:51.460 look me in the eyes and tell me that you don't think trans women struggle walking at night are you

00:38:55.260 out of your fucking mind it's so insane it was pissing me off the amount of women i saw and

00:39:00.440 and i said like i've also said to him like y'all will again ironic because it's misogyny right but

00:39:06.840 it's also transphobia too and i was like but y'all are like who is this for like who are you fighting

00:39:12.400 for because you're not fighting for me bitch like don't you dare speak for me no right i'm like i i

00:39:16.900 don't agree with what the fuck you're saying because they're like we women who's we yeah don't

00:39:20.760 include me in that shit right and then i had some people say i think it's really important

00:39:25.500 because on my video um saying like cis women need to say more things like this like be more open and

00:39:31.260 honest about it because obviously a lot of trans women were standing up for her but because people

00:39:34.900 are inherently evil and awful they're not taking them seriously that's why i was like well that's why i

00:39:39.220 said something because it is important that we say something and i even said in my video like

00:39:42.680 we talk about femicide and how important we need to take it like trans women suffer femicide far

00:39:47.100 more than all the time every day which is honestly even more tragic and awful because there are not

00:39:53.660 nearly as many trans women in the world than there are cis women so the fact that they're so much

00:39:58.600 smaller of a pool and yet they're dying at a rate far higher than us is concerning and awful and

00:40:03.940 everyone needs to give a shit about it right so that's why i'm like you guys will freak the fuck out

00:40:07.800 about anything she does because y'all are miserable and lonely and awful but at the same time you can't

00:40:13.820 stand to see someone who is living their truest self like living and being brave like she is so

00:40:20.120 fucking brave and so courageous to do what she does for a living and i feel like her platform as a whole

00:40:25.360 just her existing as who she is that's it is so fucking brave and i was like you guys you would

00:40:31.540 never last a day you wouldn't last a fucking day if you experienced 180th of what she experienced you

00:40:39.760 guys wouldn't last a fucking day there's no fucking way and especially especially after the bud light

00:40:44.720 shit that happened i was like that shit made me so fucking angry and i was like y'all tortured her

00:40:48.960 for like over a year yeah because of that shit and she didn't even do anything i mean all she did

00:40:55.040 was just just hold some beer and they sent it to her it's not like she ordered it she didn't ask

00:41:01.400 or like they literally sent it to her she's like this is really cool yeah a year a year of fucking

00:41:05.840 torture and i was like so i'm not letting you do that shit again to her i'm not letting you do it

00:41:10.720 because even last time when i i talked to her personally a lot too and she she thanked me for

00:41:16.820 my video now i'm like you don't have to fucking thank me dude like i was like get behind me dylan

00:41:20.180 get behind me girl i'm gonna protect you to worry about it people are gross and awful but i'm really

00:41:26.640 happy that people like you exist especially in the comedy space it's so important because there's a

00:41:30.680 war on trans people literally everywhere and every every fucking industry so we're gonna talk about

00:41:36.340 our topic today which is male rage against the internet's progressive intersectional movement

00:41:41.320 that's what we've been talking about this entire time obviously has to do with your comedy tour and

00:41:45.320 it's all about the rage against homophobia sexism racism and the fight to stay alive so we

00:41:49.960 have some tiktoks that are applicable to our topic and i'm just going to describe them to y'all and

00:41:56.060 then we'll kiki laugh joke about them so this one is a gay couple who just bought a house in orange

00:42:00.760 county are putting a pride flag up outside their house in the caption they describe how at first

00:42:05.600 they took it down out of fear of the city's conservative reputation but decided to put it

00:42:09.940 back up because as kids they would have been comforted by a house waving a pride flag which i love

00:42:14.240 videos like that it's cute that's so sweet again brave yeah people being brave people being

00:42:18.540 courageous like really nice and i really i just will never understand i don't understand people

00:42:24.080 who give a shit about stuff like i don't it's so i mean it's like what what is offensive about the

00:42:29.020 rainbow rainbow flag like it's just such a it's such a sweet flag it's just kind of i mean and it would

00:42:34.900 be exciting for like a person who's gay and feels insecure about it to see like reinforcing

00:42:39.880 absolutely like reinforcing like it is a symbol of peace yeah absolutely representation as a whole

00:42:48.140 always makes me like super emotional so representation in all its forms whether it's in

00:42:53.640 like huge mainstream media or it's just like your neighbor has something that makes you feel a little

00:42:58.360 less alone what the fuck is wrong with that like i'm like are you guys evil it's what's wrong with you

00:43:03.460 guys i mean and it's orange county which i mean i guess it's supposed to be conservative but it doesn't

00:43:08.140 seem like it it is to me i think it depends on where yeah because certain i think feel like

00:43:11.980 certain parts obviously like higher tax bracket parts they are pretty conservative but i feel like

00:43:17.760 other parts that are not like that because i grew up in santa anna like i was born in santa anna which

00:43:21.660 is in orange county which orange county uh bigoted people hate when i say like santa anna is in

00:43:27.540 orange county because they don't like counting santa anna because it's a very low tax bracket which i'm

00:43:32.000 like you guys are racist uh so it is an orange county bitch read it and weep yeah uh where i grew up it

00:43:37.240 wasn't like that but like i know a lot of parts of orange county are probably like that which is

00:43:41.120 fucking awful yeah terrible i'm like what's the correlation uh rich white uh oh like rich white

00:43:47.560 hate gay people check check check okay so we're gonna read some of the comments on this one so this

00:43:51.820 says i hung mine up it's blue white and red with 50 stars so yeah the american black i mean that just

00:43:59.480 like a description for the visually impaired like why don't like that's that's your idea of a joke

00:44:04.860 you're just gonna tell me what you put up me too i hung one oh bird okay made by betsy ross

00:44:13.980 ouch like i know gee you got me i mean yeah i don't give a shit if you hang up an american flag i

00:44:22.320 don't give a shit yeah the difference is i won't burn your house down if you have that yeah like who

00:44:25.980 cares like i don't give a fuck who cares and while we're on the subject when i see one of those hanging

00:44:30.120 i'm always like i'm like it's us it's a big it's real sus yeah like what especially that and like

00:44:35.920 if you combine an american flag hanging like you really like going to the river oh my sorry my

00:44:43.100 spidey senses are tingling yeah i just i sense a racist i don't think i mean yeah i have there's a

00:44:49.460 neighbor of mine that has an american flag then also outside there's a hillary clinton for prison

00:44:54.860 like i'm like um but yeah it's like or it's like the uh the black flag with the blue line

00:45:03.580 yeah the thin blue line it's like you know i don't know they refuse to acknowledge racism or

00:45:10.920 systemic oppression so bad they start making merch they're like guys we got to do something let's all

00:45:15.120 make let's all make our own flags yeah you do a blue one i'll do a red one we'll do firefighters cops

00:45:19.980 what the fuck are we doing what what are we doing why you're doing that and not voting what

00:45:24.800 the fuck is going on what is the point they're having merch offs like they're just like i'm

00:45:29.040 gonna make better merch yeah my merch stands for racism what does yours stand for being also a

00:45:34.160 firefighter why the fuck did we loop in firefighters don't bring them into it i want to keep my calendar

00:45:39.860 why you gotta fuck with it that sucks i know sometimes when if i ever like if i'm at the gym or

00:45:46.860 something and uh because my boyfriend like he he's like a big dude so like dudes are always like

00:45:52.140 like moth to a flame every time they see him in a gym and um sometimes i'm like they're like nice

00:45:56.800 men and then they turn around and they have a shirt that has like a thin blue line thing on it and i'm

00:46:00.920 like oh it's too bad it's bye forever yeah it's too bad that's unfortunate yeah i'm like something

00:46:09.600 stinks it's probably bigotry this next comment says you don't understand i know you guys are in love

00:46:16.860 but that's way too far what that why why is it too far i don't care what you do behind closed doors

00:46:23.020 but don't shove it down shove it in my face and it's a flag hanging outside of a home that's like

00:46:27.780 50 yards from yours yeah it's like when they see it they're like gay there's gay things happening in

00:46:33.720 there don't like it but it's like the most family oriented flag that you could fly like why why is it

00:46:40.740 offensive it's just colors it's weird it's just a reminder well i'm like if that flag is making you

00:46:47.960 have gay thoughts maybe you're gay there's something else you need to fly that flag yeah maybe there's

00:46:52.740 something else going on babe i don't know like yeah when i see things they don't make me think gay

00:46:56.980 thoughts but like unless i was gay yeah i'm not an expert though it's the same thing with um the drag

00:47:02.980 queen band where they're like oh it's just so early in kids lives to be like talking about these kind

00:47:09.140 of sexual experiences and i'm like what do you think they're they're not talking about sexual

00:47:13.020 experiences they literally aren't and if they're just telling you hey when you go in the world

00:47:16.500 sometimes people have a mom and a dad sometimes they'll have two moms sometimes they'll have two

00:47:19.400 dads sometimes they'll have parents that are non-binary what about that is sexual there's

00:47:22.640 literally nothing sexual making them aware of what goes on in the world is not inherently sexual

00:47:28.240 no but it's ironic because that's like their main concern when all they're doing is sexualizing

00:47:33.060 them i'm like you are sexualizing gay people and you are sexualizing drag queens that's a you

00:47:38.580 thing right kids don't have any concept of that unless you put it in their head and that's not

00:47:43.860 being put in there by going like you may run into someone with a different set of parents than you

00:47:48.020 that's it it's more sexual to give these kids like dolls of children yeah sort of like okay well

00:47:55.320 like now you're going to experience parenthood like that that's more did you have one of those yeah

00:48:00.620 i did like a baby doll yeah i had that too that's way more sexual it absolutely is when i was in

00:48:06.120 eighth grade um in my middle school we had like a whole family unit like studying or whatever it

00:48:13.360 was the last half of the year and it's because the teen pregnancy rate was so high in my school

00:48:18.620 district that they made it a requirement to teach us about like safe sex about scis all of that and

00:48:24.380 then on top of that they literally had us like cosplay as parents so like you would pick out of a

00:48:30.000 hat if you were a single parent or a widow or married and then you would marry someone and then you

00:48:34.900 guys would have to budget and then like if you got pregnant how long it would be and hospital bills

00:48:39.640 and house and all that shit like they had us doing all that shit when i was in eighth grade because

00:48:42.980 they wanted to prepare kids because it was just like i feel like if you're going to that length to

00:48:47.820 prepare people for things like that yeah what is the big fucking deal if you just include another

00:48:52.320 subset of people which really exists which is a real they're not made up yeah no they're not made up

00:48:58.020 it's a real thing like they're actually alive and existing and have for thousands of years so i'm like if you

00:49:03.920 just like expand it just a little bit more it's really not the end of the world no but he's gonna

00:49:08.680 die everything's gonna be fine and i had a fake baby i had a flower baby i had all that shit yeah

00:49:14.020 and it was a lot of work yeah this shit is hard having a kid is hard and it's putting all these

00:49:20.700 things in your head like so young you're like oh okay like intimacy like sexual partnership and even

00:49:26.040 then you don't even talk about the implications of like mentally what sexual intimacy has on you like

00:49:30.500 didn't even get to that no they're just like if you do it you might have a baby and this is what

00:49:34.080 will happen yeah but god forbid you have a storybook that's like this child has two moms and that's it

00:49:38.800 that's the last time you hear about them so crazy it's like um i think in turning red like the disney

00:49:45.400 movie like one of the one of the girls is gay and just like they just said she's gay she doesn't do

00:49:53.080 anything gay at all but they're like what where does it end yeah where does it end like that's

00:49:58.960 the outrage just the existing is the outrage she doesn't kiss anyone she doesn't hold hands

00:50:04.380 like none of them do because they're children no right but then it's like just her being there

00:50:09.940 and having the knowledge they're like what the hell is this even though the main character is

00:50:14.580 thirsting over men in a boy band they're like that's different though because straight so that's

00:50:19.480 okay yeah that's different i'm like they're the same age and the other one has no sexual

00:50:23.040 interactions at all weird how that works okay last comment on here it says if there's ever a purge

00:50:29.120 first thing i do is roam around with a flamethrower in california decimating these offenses to actual

00:50:34.860 rainbows jesus christ that's just violent that's just like a violent threat holy shit you know like

00:50:42.080 that's just scary that is so i i feel like they write that and they're like yeah yeah got him got him

00:50:48.940 what that's like a threat i mean okay yeah it just shows what kind of person that is it's just

00:50:54.820 like waiting like no for real so scary well and then you see a comment like that and then you're

00:50:59.640 like they're like you know that's awful but also i'm gonna make a three minute hate video about

00:51:04.800 dylan like i'm like do you see how you you feed into shit like that i'm like you don't have to be

00:51:09.760 outright telling people i'm gonna kill you if i find out you're gay in order to be homophobic right

00:51:14.140 homophobia and transphobia especially are so deeply ingrained in society that it's like genuinely

00:51:21.120 it is a task and a half to like on unearth it absolutely and let it go yeah um and so i find it so

00:51:28.700 frustrating especially with turfs like they're like a perfect example of that where it's like

00:51:33.680 just because you're not using slurs doesn't mean you're not being transphobic right like there

00:51:38.300 are many ways to be transphobic it's like just like there's things called microaggressions

00:51:42.220 like they're not an outright racist like a slur and i was like there are different levels to

00:51:47.000 racism though it's not all just like on the nose yeah there's just like hidden things and that's

00:51:50.820 how i feel about the homophobia and transphobia it's so fucking annoying especially when they're

00:51:54.600 like it's not it's not like homophobic for me to just say i don't like to see men kissing

00:51:59.140 in what way is that not homophobic that is homophobic in literally what way is that not like how

00:52:05.340 could i perceive that in any other way other than that because you told me not to please don't see

00:52:10.140 this is homophobic but yeah it is i'm gonna say something really homophobic fucking terrible

00:52:15.300 okay we'll go on to this last video so it says indeed.com made an ad for women's history month

00:52:21.400 and posted it on the social their social media platforms the ads a call out to businesses that

00:52:26.420 companies statistically perform better when women are in leadership roles and that during this month

00:52:30.720 companies shouldn't just post about women but actually hire and promote more women and men left

00:52:35.600 hundreds of angry comments on this video i'm shocked what a bunch of men who a bunch of men

00:52:41.720 who should be going on indeed.com and getting a job like a lot of you should be using indeed.com

00:52:46.940 more frequently right don't just comment hey go on there and mosey around maybe maybe send some

00:52:51.820 applications out while you're on there bitch this comment says quote women are powerful meanwhile

00:52:57.200 there's no female president well i mean look how well the country is doing so yeah you're right

00:53:01.240 there are no women in office look how great this country is doing and you're right that is the work

00:53:06.220 of a man that is for fucking sure that's for fucking sure i feel like they would clean house if that

00:53:10.820 were the case if women were allowed in the oval office uh this one says i kind of hate this whole

00:53:17.020 feminist thing like yeah we should all be equal but why make men seem like we're such horrible things

00:53:22.160 because they are horrible things i mean that's like what why you need you need me to draw you a map

00:53:27.700 what do you mean yeah i mean it's so clear i'm like ridiculous why do you think men are such

00:53:32.920 horrible things ask your peers that yeah i don't know why you're all are like huh yeah if i could

00:53:37.420 change it i would yeah it's growing up with the entitled position of being a man yeah and that you

00:53:43.520 know they're they're fed this lie that they're better so they should be mad you know you can like

00:53:49.520 take a back seat for once like just once just once and even then it's like it's not even a back

00:53:55.600 step to the side so i can stand next to you shit so i don't want to be i don't have to be in front

00:54:00.460 of you shit just let me get next to you at least but they're so threatened yeah and it's because

00:54:05.600 they know i feel like it's the same thing um when white people try to say like they try to weaponize

00:54:11.680 racism against black people and they're like well that happened a long time ago like oh god why is it

00:54:17.500 a fucking war on white people or whatever the fuck i'm like i was like literally when when did that

00:54:24.420 happen when it's never been and it's just like we're trying to rectify all of these wrongs and

00:54:30.140 it's still happening yeah yeah literally and we're not doing a very good job it's not moving nearly as

00:54:34.480 fast as it should in those moments it's like okay well why do you have to make everything about you

00:54:40.540 like why are you constantly being centered and i said that to women on for dylan's stuff too i'm like

00:54:45.800 why do you feel the need to center yourself in a trans woman's experience why is that all of a

00:54:50.760 done about you yeah and it's not it's literally not same thing it's same thing with women like

00:54:54.980 the feminist movement like why why are you asking about yourself when i'm talking about me right i

00:55:00.800 don't give a fuck about you y'all are doing fine y'all are doing great uh like you're doing super

00:55:06.060 super awesome without us so like it's so funny too because when i was in new york i did a podcast and

00:55:11.860 she was really great and she asked me a question she was like do you ever think that we're being too

00:55:16.540 mean to men um like especially on the internet and i was like uh the short answer is no not at

00:55:22.040 all in fact i don't think i'm being mean enough i feel like i need to up my numbers this quarter

00:55:25.820 personally absolutely i was like honestly if there were no rules on tiktok i would be even meaner i'd

00:55:31.660 be a thousand times meaner men would never come back to the internet and they don't already and

00:55:35.600 that's with me fighting with one hand tied behind my back if they could really if they cut the brakes

00:55:40.600 off my bitch i would go crazy i'd go absolutely insane i love it but i can't i'm tied by the big

00:55:45.400 the man they got me i was like so no i don't and i was like also have you seen that new thing

00:55:51.740 that's going on right now in new york where women are getting punched yeah just sucker punched

00:55:55.240 it's so infuriating it's so infuriating but it just shows how angry men are yeah and that they're

00:56:03.560 just like aligning now in droves to just punch women in the face for no reason and you know what's

00:56:09.540 awful too about that is i was thinking this morning like um obviously there are men just being

00:56:13.860 awful in general and then now that women are being open and posting about it i feel like there are

00:56:18.400 men who are just doing it because they can now because if a million women are getting punched

00:56:24.140 right and all these men look different they have a chance to like hide and hide and do it so they're

00:56:28.760 like now's my chance to go punch a bitch what is the matter with you so sickening it's so because

00:56:34.960 they just want women to be afraid i know and that's what is so real infuriating like it's just like

00:56:41.060 i'm glad that these women are making these videos and talking about it but at the same time

00:56:45.240 now you're just having women just be afraid like we're not supposed to be in the street we're not

00:56:50.920 supposed to be walking around absolutely and it's like in broad daylight yeah outside all different

00:56:56.280 kinds of men yeah and there's people outside at the same time it's not like a late night thing or

00:57:01.340 anything which makes it extra horrifying yeah and a while ago too i made a video like talking about

00:57:06.460 how like i think there there was this girl that went viral because she was saying like

00:57:09.940 uh one of her friends got beat up because she tried standing up for her and then the girl didn't do

00:57:14.820 anything and she just kind of watched and so that girl was getting dragged all over the internet for

00:57:17.860 that and she was like i didn't even know her that well and blah blah blah and i'm like well that's

00:57:21.700 extra awful like you watch someone get the shit kicked out of her defending you and now you're like

00:57:25.480 fuck her yeah which is so awful but i basically said like when i was younger like when i was in college

00:57:32.080 um i was like borderline insane when it came to men pissing me off in public like i had no fear

00:57:37.620 which is not a good thing and i've told people i had no fear at all i've squared up with men multiple

00:57:42.040 fucking times i didn't give a shit anytime and i won every time yeah and i was like but that was just

00:57:46.960 because i felt so strongly that like no one else is gonna do it only we're gonna do it like women and

00:57:53.640 lgbtqia plus people like we have to stick together yeah because they're not gonna fucking do anything

00:57:58.580 like whenever they wield that fuck ass like well what are you gonna do when you need protection

00:58:03.700 what are you gonna do i'm like well i'm sure as fuck not calling you because you don't do anything

00:58:07.600 i was like the amount of times i've been objectified i've been assaulted in public like you know being

00:58:11.320 grab ass whatever the fuck you know how many fucking men were around me and didn't do anything

00:58:14.880 the only person who did anything was fucking me i was like so i'm not relying on you bitches for

00:58:19.060 anything right absolutely i'm fucking not so i was telling women like all we have is community

00:58:24.220 right so like don't let men ruin that too like don't turn on each other don't start saying like

00:58:28.160 well that's none of my business like yeah i don't give a fuck if i know that bitch or i hate her i'm

00:58:32.480 not letting a man put his hands on her in front of me absolutely fucking not no i don't care i don't

00:58:37.360 give a shit right even if i despise that woman i'm still i'm still doing something that's right and i

00:58:42.140 feel like that's probably the extra scary thing about the new york stuff too is like obviously it's

00:58:46.420 happening frequently and rapidly right now and then it's like in broad daylight there's it's there's no

00:58:51.140 pattern to it it's just so random and then on top of that there are people around who aren't doing

00:58:55.540 anything yeah and i feel like sometimes people are like well you know stand you know when people

00:59:00.040 get nervous or whatever like they have that standard by kind of like thing where they just don't do

00:59:04.780 anything because they like freeze which i guess okay that's fine a valid trauma response that's fine

00:59:09.360 but like i feel like we need to push past that when women are being targeted step up like let's do

00:59:15.320 something you don't have to physically get involved but like you could call someone yeah you could like

00:59:18.640 go take care you know what i mean there's whatever it is because the first one i saw the girl said she

00:59:22.540 was laying on the ground and the guy was just standing over her like screaming at her so scary

00:59:25.840 and who the fuck what was there no one around you yeah and she said there were people around her and

00:59:30.300 they just weren't doing anything yeah like minding their business or ignoring it and i'm like

00:59:33.560 oh hell no but that's terrifying and one of my one of my friends teffy she made one she goes

00:59:39.240 honestly guys i'm going through it right now and she lives in new york and she's like i'm going through

00:59:42.960 a rough time right now so um nobody better punch me because i have nothing to lose yeah she's like i have

00:59:48.780 nothing to lose right that's right don't you dare do that to me that's the last thing i have is just

00:59:52.500 being able to walk in the sun now that the the weather's being nice she's like i'm not letting

00:59:57.180 you take that shit from me no which i'm like real that's super real okay last comment on this one he

01:00:03.920 just wrote shut up woman should be better mother okay well he looks like he would say that uh i could

01:00:12.140 see i wish i could show a picture of him but he's not very good looking if you can believe it margaret

01:00:16.800 when somebody says woman shut up woman i mean that's all i need i've heard enough that's so

01:00:24.260 shut up woman okay okay no for sure bye okay well fuck him i'm not even gonna spend time on that

01:00:31.720 bullshit ass comment i'll wrap us up right now but we talked about all kinds of stuff especially

01:00:35.800 about intersectionality and how important it is and like community um but obviously your um legacy

01:00:42.680 is comedy and like being such a pillar for women in comedy so i would love to know what your best

01:00:48.160 piece of advice is for women especially women of color who want to come up in comedy but also

01:00:52.680 feel very strongly that they want to like stand in their morals and like yeah you know it's really

01:00:57.900 hard especially in hollywood to like with conviction stand with your morals and at the same time not live

01:01:03.320 in fear of like not being hired not getting you know jobs or whatever it is so like i would love to

01:01:07.840 know what your best piece of advice is for aspiring female comics just to value your voice above all

01:01:13.360 that your voice is the most important and to get it out there is so important not just for you but

01:01:18.060 for so many people totally you don't even know how many people that you're gonna help with your truth

01:01:23.520 yeah so just don't be afraid yeah and just get out there and do it love period thank you so much

01:01:28.800 margaret for coming on the show you're an icon a legend i love you too i'm honored to have had you

01:01:33.580 i'm so honored thank you you're amazing and thank you all so much for joining us on this episode of

01:01:37.820 the comment section show where can everybody find you people can find me um i uh my tour dates are

01:01:43.620 on margaretcho.com um i'm on instagram at margaret underscore cho and i'm on tic tac too at the

01:01:49.280 margaret cho period make sure y'all go follow margaret on literally everything i know y'all probably

01:01:53.900 already know who margaret is but make sure y'all go see margaret on tour as well that's gonna be

01:01:58.300 amazing i can already feel it i feel it in my bones thank you so much for coming on the show i adore you

01:02:02.660 you're amazing thank you everyone for joining us don't forget new episodes of the comment section

01:02:07.020 drop every wednesday you can stream the audio on all streaming platforms but the video

01:02:10.700 lives for free and exclusively on our favorite platform spotify thank you so much for watching

01:02:14.820 thank you to my amazing guest margaret cho and i'll see you next week bye

The Comment Section with Drew Afualo - April 17, 2024

DE-CENTER MEN Ft. Margaret Cho

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