The Comment Section with Drew Afualo - HEAVILY LACTOSE INTOLERANT Ft. Amber Wallin

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00:00:59.980 Sometimes I'll get invited to stuff and I'm like, what time does it start?

00:01:03.200 Oh my gosh. That is the crossroad I constantly face when I'm trying to get back into stand-up

00:01:09.020 comedy. Oh yeah. Cause like, yep, you bet, you bet. 11 p.m. You're slot. You're like,

00:01:14.580 11 p.m. I have a toddler. Like, I would be woken up at 4 a.m. to like, a sticky hand slap.

00:01:21.580 Talking about something. Mommy, what does a zebra say? Like, that is my morning. Every morning.

00:01:26.460 Do you know what a zebra says, Drew? I still don't. No. I never have an answer to that question.

00:01:30.500 Hey everyone. And welcome back to another episode of the comment section show starring

00:01:40.460 me, your fave. Everybody knows me. Who cares about me? On to the guests. Today we have the

00:01:44.920 iconic, the hilarious, the legendary Amber Wallen. This is an applause track, right?

00:01:51.360 Yeah. Yeah. Hey Amsterdam. Welcome to the show. I'm so happy to have you.

00:01:56.380 So I'm proud of myself for being here. Like seriously, it's like learn how to ride a bike,

00:02:02.040 learn to read, be on Drew. I'm very excited to be here today. Yeah. I don't, I don't have

00:02:06.560 to do anything else the rest of the year. I'm honored. That's so awesome. I'm such a big

00:02:09.880 fan of yours. We've been like, I feel like passing ships. We've been passing each other

00:02:13.500 a minute. Yeah. There's definitely like a evidence web of us almost coming together.

00:02:18.560 And so it happened. Benita. Benita. Caleb. Caleb. Yes. We were, we were bound to cross paths

00:02:23.940 eventually. We were, if it didn't happen by this year, I would have had to figure out

00:02:27.760 where you live. So I'm glad that you got me on. Thank God. Thank God. It didn't have

00:02:32.260 to get violent. You know what I mean? I didn't want to have to do that. I didn't want to have

00:02:36.100 to resort to that. So I'm so glad that you're on the show now. I'm such a huge fan of you

00:02:40.580 and your family, your husband, Ben. My friends are fine. They're roommates. They're cool.

00:02:46.060 Yeah. My workers, my employees are really, really great. Yeah. Ben and Wild, uh, say hello.

00:02:51.620 Yeah. I want to tell you like the first, I think the first videos I ever saw of you were

00:02:57.060 obviously like poking fun at your husband, Ben, which I found hilarious. Cause I, thank

00:03:01.060 you. I just think like, get a joke. What I, well that. And also I think what I loved most

00:03:05.700 about your content in the beginning, especially was like when I first saw you was how it's very

00:03:10.300 real. Like relationships are, they're funny and they're difficult and they're like, I just

00:03:14.800 felt like your relationship was very real. Oh, absolutely. Not as curated as most couples

00:03:18.800 are on the internet. Right. I'm just so sick of that. Like we, I'm sick of the fairy

00:03:24.240 tales. I'm sick of the top 10 things to bag your man. Let's, let's talk about what happens

00:03:29.420 when you bag them. Right. You make fun of them. And how annoying they are. Let's talk

00:03:32.120 about that. Listen, if you've never taken care of a man while he's sick, buckle up. Like

00:03:37.140 that you have to make fun of that. Right. Cause it's, it's a new hell. It's a prison sentence.

00:03:41.720 Right. Taking care of a man with a, with a cold. So you have to make fun of your

00:03:46.680 partner. It's not going to work if not. Yeah. It's so funny too. Cause like, obviously

00:03:50.700 you love and respect your partner, but then there's part where they just get on your fucking

00:03:55.500 nerves. Seriously. Like anybody in a long-term relationship knows like you have hard days

00:04:00.060 and it's like, we're not allowed to talk about the hard days amongst other friends or on

00:04:04.800 the internet. So I was like, let's, let's shit on our men. Let's do it. Let's do it.

00:04:09.900 What are we doing? We've done everything else. Let's shit on them now. Well, and also like

00:04:14.960 they are annoying. They are. And I'm annoying. And he should, and the kids annoying and we

00:04:20.860 annoy her and the dog hates me. My neighbors hate me. Like let's make some content out of

00:04:26.700 this. I'm so curious, like how you got started in the first place. Like what made you want

00:04:30.900 to start filming and kind of posting it? Yeah. So I was a big comedy sketch improv girl

00:04:36.800 in Chicago before we lived in Chicago for about 10 years. And honestly, I think this

00:04:41.660 is probably everybody's story. I got laid off from the comedy club at the top of the

00:04:44.940 pandemic and I was always all getting fired. I got fired too. Best thing that ever happened

00:04:49.420 to me, right? We literally bought a condo in Chicago with my unemployment checks because

00:04:54.660 I don't know if y'all got unemployed during the pandemic, but those checks were fat. I was

00:04:59.200 like, wait, this is triple what I make. This is literally how much I should have been

00:05:03.240 naked. Unemployment is great. Lay me off again. And so I got laid off from the comedy club

00:05:09.080 and then I was like, well, Ben, maybe I can just, whatever sketches I was going to possibly

00:05:13.440 write or do on stage, maybe I can kind of recreate those with funny things we do. Like

00:05:17.240 I'm the dramatic person. You're playing the straight man trope in the comedy set. So I

00:05:23.200 was like, let's just replay that. And people love that energy. How did you guys meet? I'm

00:05:27.960 so interested. Oh, we met on Tinder. Really? Yes. Very romantic. I know so many Tinder

00:05:33.800 people or like Hinge, Tinder and Hinge. Yeah. People meet on dating apps. That's crazy. They

00:05:38.020 do. Well, to be fair, this was in like 2014, 2015. So this is when dating apps, the application

00:05:44.520 not like, you know, there's always been Christian mingling, eHarmony and stuff like that. But Tinder

00:05:49.440 was supposed to be America's hookup app. Yeah. So I was like, oh, are we hooking up virtually?

00:05:54.520 Really? Hell yeah. So I literally got on. I promise you, I got drunk one night because

00:05:59.080 I had just been ghosted by this guy. I got drunk and was just swiping. Like anybody could

00:06:04.460 have got it. You know what I'm saying? And Ben was in that batch. Ben was in that batch

00:06:09.000 of anybody can fuck around and get it. And so I told him he had, he had some sort of like

00:06:15.340 poetry, like something on his page. You know how to poets are. I actually hate poetry, but

00:06:20.920 I think, I think it's funny. You're like, it's like, oh, you, you're talking about the

00:06:25.160 wind. Okay. And so he has some poetry on there. So I was like, what a loser. Why not? And

00:06:30.760 so I told him, I was like, Hey, I'm going to the dog park with my dog. If you want to

00:06:35.800 come, this is where I'll be. That was our first date. Like it's going to happen with

00:06:40.120 or without you. And he showed up at the dog park and we talked at the dog beach for

00:06:44.940 like six hours on the beach. So how fun. It was all day dates. Yeah. And you were like,

00:06:50.020 and he got me. Oh, big time. Cause it turns out I was a fiend for that poetry shit. I did.

00:06:58.560 I was like, give me that Edgar Allen poe. Okay. Let me tell you something. Yeah. Love. So

00:07:03.460 you know how on that first date with your man, you're like, okay, this is how he got

00:07:07.620 me. Yeah. And then there's a point where it's like, now this is how he really got

00:07:11.460 you. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Okay. So we had been dating for about a month and he

00:07:16.540 said to me, Hey, I have to spend a couple of weeks in New York with my family and

00:07:21.100 I'll be at a cabin where I won't have phone service. So, you know, this has been a

00:07:26.600 great month, but I got to go spend some time with my family, you know, secluded,

00:07:30.120 whatever. I was like, Oh, I get the hit. Like you can, we can just break up. Like

00:07:32.720 you don't have to make up this like ominous lie. Right. Right. Like what he means you

00:07:37.380 won't have phone service for a week. Like that's, that's mayhem.

00:07:39.920 Pilgrim. Literally a whole Mayflower home. So I was like, that's fine. He was

00:07:45.080 like, well, no, I, I, I'll just write you letters. And I was like, okay, girl,

00:07:48.860 like, no, you're, you're not going to write fucking letters. It's 2015. And so

00:07:53.040 one day when he was gone on that week trip, I went to my mailbox maybe like a

00:07:58.400 day or two after that. And it had a couple of letters from him. So he actually sat

00:08:02.780 down, wrote the letters. And even in the letters, there was poetry in the letters.

00:08:06.260 And there were also like, uh, like, uh, this is real, this is kind of like weird,

00:08:12.320 I guess, like pieces of grass and flowers from where he was from. And so he would

00:08:17.260 rope and he would fold that up. And those were in the letters also.

00:08:20.380 Like he was pressing like plants in there. He was like, I want a piece of where I am

00:08:24.240 to be where you are energy. And I was like, you're getting mad immediately. I was

00:08:29.880 like, get out of my face. I wanted to rip the letter up. Cause I was like, how can

00:08:33.720 anyone love me that much? It's just, yeah, it's just too sweet. It's almost like

00:08:36.700 overwhelming. It's disgusting. And I ate it the fuck up and we've been happy ever

00:08:41.560 since. That's so real. You're so me, dude. That's so funny. Even with my boyfriend

00:08:46.680 too, like our very first day ever was the fair, which I felt was so like

00:08:51.520 corn ball. Oh, that's heavy notebook energy. Yeah. Yeah. So like, and then we

00:08:56.400 went and I got drunk obviously, uh, on the date cause I was like, I was too

00:09:00.820 nervous to eat before, but then I drank too much there. And then I was like,

00:09:04.100 kind of just sweaty and drunk. I was like, anyway, it's like me talking and he

00:09:09.260 bought me this by giant bag of kettle corn to like, he's like, maybe you should

00:09:13.540 like, you know, snack on this. I was like, okay, whatever. And so I remember the fair

00:09:18.660 was cute and everything. And I felt like the thing with my boyfriend was very

00:09:22.740 intentional. Like he was very like, I want to see you again, which I was not

00:09:26.120 used to at all. Oh, of course not. You know, they're never like, Oh, I want to see

00:09:29.540 you when like, we should hang out again. When I'll let you know. Like, yeah, it's

00:09:33.220 like, Oh, we'll see. You're like, Oh, well it was nice knowing you. Yeah. And I'm like,

00:09:37.080 fuck you. Uh, but he was like, no, I want to see you. Like, what about tomorrow? And I'm

00:09:40.720 like tomorrow, like tomorrow, tomorrow, like that, that intentionality was throwing me

00:09:44.940 off. Like I was like, okay. And like when they're urgent to see you. Yeah. And I

00:09:49.160 remember one time I had told him, he's like, well, what do you do during the day?

00:09:51.760 Like, I'd love to come like, hang out with you. Like this was like a, probably a

00:09:55.020 week or two into dating. And I was like, Oh, cause at the time I was really just

00:09:58.620 like a nanny for my brother. Like my little brother was in football and he was

00:10:02.000 doing all kinds of stuff. So I was just driving him around all the time. Cause I

00:10:04.600 didn't have a job. So you're trying to sound busy. Like I was like, God, I have so many

00:10:09.600 appointments tomorrow. Just meet my brother. And so I, I was like, well, I had to see my

00:10:13.800 brother to like, he was playing like peewee football and he was like, Oh, I want

00:10:17.460 to come. Can I come and like sit with you? And I was like, Oh my through a peewee

00:10:21.140 football game. Oh, he loved you. Yeah. And they're like three hours long. And I was

00:10:25.820 like, well, it's kind of boring. And he's like, I don't care. I just want to be

00:10:28.700 with you. And I was like, knock it off. Hey, knock it off. We'll punch you in your

00:10:33.000 throat. Like, what do you mean you want to be with me? Yeah. And I remember then he's

00:10:36.720 like, text me what time it starts. And I was like, okay. So I didn't text him because I

00:10:40.760 thought he was just being nice. So I just didn't like, I just didn't do

00:10:44.040 anything. I didn't invite him, nothing. And then he texts me like hours after he

00:10:47.740 knew that it had already started. And he was like, Hey, I thought you were going to

00:10:50.660 text me. Like what time did it start? And I didn't text until the next day. And I

00:10:54.240 was like, I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I fell asleep. And then I had to take him to

00:10:57.400 practice and I just completely forgot. Like I made up some shit. And then he

00:11:00.280 texts me back. I remember he was like, you didn't forget. You just didn't want me to

00:11:03.400 come. And I was like, that's not true. I didn't want you to come. I just like

00:11:06.820 thought maybe you were just saying that because of me over explaining. I mean, we

00:11:09.360 learned in that moment, like, Oh, he's going to confront issues when they first

00:11:12.280 arise. We love that. I was like, damn aggressive. Ooh. He's like, no, I was dead

00:11:19.720 serious. So like tomorrow it starts at 12. Okay. I'll be at your house. And he was at

00:11:22.780 my house like 45 minutes early. And I was like, girl, okay. All right. Is he on

00:11:27.220 time? Oh no, no. I'm always late. So I've made him super late, but like he was

00:11:34.400 never late before he started dating me. He was always so early. We're always almost

00:11:38.360 about to miss a flight because of Ben, which is crazy because there's no prep

00:11:42.540 time. There's no, what are you prepping to put? Which socks am I going to wear

00:11:46.000 with these sandals? Like, what are you prepping? He'll sit in the bed and read

00:11:50.680 and he'll, he loves being like, I got wrapped up in this thought. I'm just like,

00:11:56.840 well, while you wrapped up in thoughts, we missed our goddamn flight. Like he's

00:11:59.920 like that person. Those thoughts cost me a lot of money. Like if he could be like a

00:12:04.020 philosopher, he would. He's like, I just, right. He's like, I wish I just had more

00:12:08.500 time to sit and think about things. You know, I'm like, okay. No, actually I can't

00:12:13.760 relate to that. Not even a little bit. Right. And I'm like holding our toddler

00:12:15.920 who just puked. I was like, why don't you think about getting a rag to clean this shit

00:12:19.980 up off my shoulder? Like, put your mind to that. Put your mind to that. So 45 minutes

00:12:26.060 early is wild. Crazy. Isn't that crazy? I was like, like that almost makes me think

00:12:30.340 he slept outside your house. Like how, why are you 45 minutes early? Do you have coffee

00:12:34.860 in tow or something? He's so obsessed with me. I mean, I get it. I remember the first time

00:12:40.680 like I went away and we were dating. It was probably like a month into dating and I had to

00:12:45.600 go away. I went to Vegas with my family for like a week. And so I didn't see him for a week,

00:12:49.440 but he texted me while I was gone. And then he was like, Hey, what day do you get back?

00:12:52.800 Like my, you know, I'm having a party at my house. Like you should come and meet my family

00:12:56.440 and stuff. I was like, okay. Meet the family. How soon, how far in were y'all at this point?

00:13:01.420 A month. Like probably a month. Yeah. Like some change. I was like, Oh yeah, sure. And so he was

00:13:07.520 like, if you get back, like, please tell me. And so I got back in time. And so I drove to his house

00:13:12.200 and I remember this was my first time ever going to his parents, like new house. And I had met his

00:13:16.740 parents briefly because we went to high school. Oh, he won't show off the house. Yeah. But I

00:13:20.460 didn't know. I see the strategy. Yeah. I didn't like, uh, I hadn't met them in forever. I hadn't

00:13:24.940 seen his brother in forever. So like, um, this was my first time meeting them as like dating him.

00:13:29.180 And so I remember I pulled up and I had to park kind of far down the street because

00:13:32.280 there were so many people at the house and he saw my car from far away and he ran down the street

00:13:37.800 to my car and he like opened my door for me. And then he like, he kissed me and he was like,

00:13:42.740 I really missed you. That was the first thing he said to me. And I was like, fuck, fuck. I was

00:13:47.920 like, I'm in love. Fuck. Damn it. Fuck. Let me get back in this car and put it in reverse and hit you

00:13:52.580 with the car. Cause there's no way you're real. Yeah. There's no way. I was so overwhelmed. I was

00:13:57.300 like, Oh, and he was like, yeah, come on. I want to, I want to introduce you. He wanted to show you

00:14:01.380 that house. Yeah. How was that house? It was nice. Oh yeah. Nice house. I'm like, look, we got some good

00:14:05.920 crown molding up in here. I was like, I want to be a part of this. This is white people shit.

00:14:09.580 Oh, look at these, look at these floors. Oh, waxed and shit. Oh, I love that. It was, uh,

00:14:15.240 the beginning of the end for me at that point. I was like, Oh, damn it. A little piece of me died

00:14:19.960 that day. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. The Grinch's heart. I'm so curious too. Like what, how has Ben

00:14:25.640 been, uh, with all the content and like all the attention that you guys get now as a couple,

00:14:30.440 I've created a monster, Drew. I don't know what to tell you. One day you give the man a speaking role

00:14:36.140 and the next day he's, he's a guest star, then a co-star. And then you look up and you're

00:14:41.640 the supporting character in the story. You know what I'm saying? We're, we're at that

00:14:45.260 stage, but he loves it. I've actually taught him how to, of course we love making content

00:14:50.420 together, but I've, I've also taught him how to edit and stuff too. So I'm like, Oh yes,

00:14:54.300 I can duplicate double me. Sometimes he doesn't quite get it right. Yeah. Yeah. It's nobody

00:14:59.340 wants to work these days. Yeah. But sometimes he, he really gets it right. And I'm just kind

00:15:04.660 of like, that was actually a little better than my edit. Watch yourself. You ate that

00:15:08.860 one little thing. You ate that one. Right. You're not getting a bonus, but I will do a

00:15:12.400 pizza party, you know? So he's actually really great at helping me and, and helping me with

00:15:17.960 like business stuff. Like, I think we really underestimate like how many business things

00:15:23.000 need to get done. He's like, you need to make this like official government business like

00:15:28.020 on paper. I was like, what do I look like changing the toner ink on the printer? Like, that's

00:15:33.260 crazy. Like you check the mail. Some stuff is man work. You know what I'm saying? And

00:15:38.480 it's work I don't want to do. I'm not doing that. Yeah. I'm not doing it. So he's good

00:15:42.200 at like sending invoices. Yeah. Stuff like that. Like I'm not doing that. There's certain

00:15:46.380 things. Yeah. Where I'm kind of like, Hey, I don't care enough about this. So can you do

00:15:50.800 it? Please. You do it. I don't want to do it. He's also really good at, um, like I'll type

00:15:56.380 an email and I have a tendency cause you know, I'm a woman over explaining things and apologizing

00:16:02.260 and he loves taking my computer and being like, delete, delete, delete, delete, delete,

00:16:05.940 delete. I want to request a meeting. Send. And I'm like, I can't just request the meeting.

00:16:09.780 I got to tell him what it's about. And he's like, no, send it. Like I would send it. Yeah.

00:16:13.260 So he's really good at reminding me like, no, you're worth this amount. Like, and if they

00:16:17.740 don't want to take it, they don't have to. I love that. Especially in this business.

00:16:21.120 Cause you have to like advocate for yourself all the time. Yeah. And it's like the wild,

00:16:24.220 wild West. You're like, well, I know they might've paid this person this much, but I don't

00:16:27.520 know how much, like if we are the same in this internet space or whatever. Has your

00:16:32.820 content shifted at all since having wild and having a baby? Oh yeah. Has it like expanded

00:16:37.500 or has it made it harder to make content? It has expanded, uh, because you know, people

00:16:43.200 love babies. You want to make some money, have a baby. But there is a world where now you're

00:16:48.120 kind of like, you'll do something. And then people are like, you're wearing that bikini.

00:16:52.380 You're, you're a parent. Like it'll be a little bit of that stuff.

00:16:55.840 They start like minimizing you down to just a mom now. Right. You're like, what are y'all

00:16:59.980 getting high? Like you have a child. You're like, Oh, were we not? Oh, okay. Like, right.

00:17:05.420 So it's that. Cause life stops. Once you have a child, life stops. You can't be happy or fulfilled

00:17:10.600 or anything. If you ever choose to have kids or whatever, of course it's your decision.

00:17:15.260 Anything you accomplish is your child's accomplishment. Like I literally made a documentary.

00:17:20.820 It was at a film festival. I'm posting like, Hey, my doc's at this festival. And the comment

00:17:25.600 section was like, congrats, wild. And I'm like, what are we doing?

00:17:29.480 Hey, she didn't do anything. Literally anything you're ever nominated for. If you have a kid,

00:17:34.000 somebody's gonna be like, congrats to the kid. And you're like, what? We have lost the plot.

00:17:38.240 Right. She didn't do shit.

00:17:40.060 Or the order to be like, look, look at Ben's wife winning stuff. And I'm like, Oh yeah, that,

00:17:44.340 that type of shit. It's kind of like in not, not the, obviously not the child comparison,

00:17:48.840 but with your partner, they'll say shit to me. That's disrespectful. And then they'll be like,

00:17:53.080 Oh my bad, dude. I didn't know like to him. So like, I didn't know. He earns respect,

00:17:58.800 but not you. Yeah. Like they, they're sorry for disrespecting someone else's girl instead of the

00:18:03.300 girl herself. Because I'm just like a person. I'm not, I'm not a person to them. I'm just like an

00:18:07.620 idea and a thought. And I'm like, what the fuck? And even, I don't know if you get this. I'm sure

00:18:11.400 you do. But like, sometimes I'll get shit where they're like, Oh, it's clearly because of the money.

00:18:15.100 That's why he's there. Cause of the money. And I was like, even if he was,

00:18:19.680 I got a lot of it. That's why you're there in your relationship. Maybe like, or, or maybe that's

00:18:26.220 why you're not right. Like, wow. And you see these fugly ass pictures. I'm like, this was before

00:18:31.340 drew had any money. Drew had no money. Drew had $0 when we started dating. Right. I can't get with

00:18:37.580 the, it's, it's because of the money because like, I don't get that. Well, it's so funny because it's

00:18:43.020 like, so which one is it? Are we gold diggers or are they with us because of the money? Like,

00:18:46.700 like choose a side. Like we can't be both. So people love to be like, women want these

00:18:51.320 like high value earning men with all this money. And then it's like, well, what happens

00:18:55.200 if I'm that? Well, he's just there because you have all this money. Okay. Well, right.

00:19:00.300 And yet in both scenarios, I have someone and you have nobody. Right. So maybe you're worrying

00:19:04.860 about the wrong math girl. You're worried like you got clocked back into your shift, right?

00:19:09.320 You took your break to argue with me and now you got to get back on the clock.

00:19:13.020 Yeah. I was going to ask you about hate. Like, do you ever get any hate on your relationship?

00:19:18.000 Oh, of course. Well, what's really nice is eventually once you start getting like a nice

00:19:24.980 following, you, you find your people. Totally. So, you know, your faves will tear down the

00:19:29.700 haters, but early on it's hard because there's a lot of like, you're building to it. Yeah.

00:19:34.640 The early days was just like straight up and down racism. And then as you create more,

00:19:39.880 the racism is a little bit more nuanced, which I can appreciate. You know what I'm saying?

00:19:43.020 Like getting a little bored. Right. Like I can't, I can't deal with this. Like the,

00:19:46.800 what is this like slave and master trope here? But now we're getting more nuanced. Like,

00:19:50.520 yeah. Oh, she's the angry black woman. Blah, blah, blah. Okay. You know, still bad,

00:19:54.540 but we're getting better. Right. We're moving, I guess, forward. Lateral. I don't know what you would.

00:20:00.500 Yeah. It's slow, but it is progress. Yeah. Whereas now I'll be honest with you. Like Ben and I

00:20:06.160 kind of made a rule in our relationship that like, cause it's so hard, right? It's so hard

00:20:11.080 not to read your comment section or whatever. So we, we made a rule that we will never bring up

00:20:17.240 comments in either of our sections to each other. Yeah. And that now has lent itself to me,

00:20:23.900 not even reading them as much. Well, that's good. I mean, like whatever protects your piece too,

00:20:29.160 especially as a creator, especially for us, like when you're full-time creators, like you're

00:20:33.780 constantly posting any sort of content on any platform. And so having to look at comments all

00:20:39.340 the time can be exhausting, especially when you're in an interracial relationship. I can only imagine

00:20:44.660 like, it's just like having to see that shit all the time. I'm good. Yeah. And it's so old to you,

00:20:51.460 right? Like I don't wake up every day and think like, Oh, he's white. Like, like we've been together

00:20:55.260 for like 10 years now. So I'm like, Oh, like maybe year one was like some awkward cultural

00:21:00.080 things. And of course, cultural things still happen, but it's kind of like, it goes, it's

00:21:03.480 like, you have a nose ring. You're like, well, I know I have it. Maybe it might be shocking to you,

00:21:07.620 but like, it's not like I wear this every day, you know, that's a horrible comparison. Yeah.

00:21:12.640 Them bringing it to your attention. Them bringing it. Yeah. You see the obscure, uh, analogy there.

00:21:18.060 So I definitely think that, um, when it comes to comments, I'm kind of going back to my roots of

00:21:25.000 like, well, when I was a stage performer, would I ever jump into the audience and talk to them

00:21:31.060 about what they thought about the show? Like I wouldn't do that. So I have to kind of keep that

00:21:35.140 mentality with the internet. That's actually a really great way of looking at it. Right. Because

00:21:38.540 that, that would sound absurd. Like Mona Lisa wouldn't jump off the wall and be like, Oh, y'all

00:21:42.860 don't like what you see. She's going to stay on the wall and be like, what do you guys think I

00:21:46.160 should do? Right. Yeah. I'm, she's going to sit behind the bulletproof glass and it's like,

00:21:50.540 if y'all hate it, that's fine. But people all around the world came to see me. Period. I am

00:21:54.680 obviously the Mona Lisa in this, in this scenario, in this scenario. So yeah, that's kind of how I've

00:22:00.340 had to treat my comment section now. And I had to even get to a point where I was telling my family

00:22:03.720 members, like, yeah, feel free to go at them because you know, feel free to get your pitch

00:22:08.880 works out and do your thing. But like, yeah, they smell blood in the water when you start giving one

00:22:13.100 attention. So I was like, I can't do it. I've kind of peeled back a little bit on that too. Yeah.

00:22:17.280 What's your strategy? I think more so than anything now I'm just bored. So it's like,

00:22:21.340 it's the same shit over and over again. You know, I'm sure, you know, too, like they never

00:22:24.740 get more creative. It just, it's just like the volume increases. Like there's just more

00:22:29.240 of them, but it's all the same shit thousands of times over. So like for me, like men will

00:22:34.500 say the exact same insults to me all the fucking time about like what I look like or my relationship

00:22:39.600 or blah, blah, blah, blah, blah. And it's always fat, ugly. He's with you for ugly. Yeah.

00:22:44.340 Yeah. Can you believe it? Now I'll take a thick every now and then, you know, I had a baby,

00:22:50.700 but when they try to hit the ugliest, like I said, please, wow. Like, come on. You can't

00:22:56.960 lie to me, bitch. You can't lie to me. Stop. Like that's crazy. That's crazy. You're lying

00:23:02.460 on Beyonce's internet. Like fat's not bad, but ugly is absurd. Like you don't lost your fucking

00:23:08.780 mind. You out your fucking mind. You're out of your mind. I've even said to people, I'm

00:23:12.340 like, I know I'm not ugly, but even if I was like, let's just say I was lower on the,

00:23:16.100 on like my face card balance was low. Let's just say that was the case. I got one bitch

00:23:20.400 beat and it's you. It's whoever wrote that fucking comment. I know I'm better looking

00:23:24.320 than you. It really boils down to like, and this is me. So growing up, we got to be in

00:23:29.380 different reading groups, right? Totally. Some of us got to read Shakespeare and some of us

00:23:33.960 had to be in, you know, cat, cat, you know what I'm saying? Yeah. And so the internet

00:23:37.860 is this amazing place where all of the reading groups are in the same classroom.

00:23:43.280 That's actually such a good point. It's the lunch table. So you're like, I'm reading like

00:23:47.200 Wherefore Out That Romeo and you're reading Word Bert. So like, I can't, I can't argue

00:23:52.740 with you. Yeah. You ain't even reading that. Green Eggs and Ham is actually a pretty challenging

00:23:57.100 book. Like I read it to my daughter. I'm like, damn, this is like, when do we get to the end?

00:24:02.380 Right. Like they're reading like a ball on one page and the next page is the teddy bear.

00:24:08.000 Yeah. It's like those, those feeler ones, those little baby books where you can feel

00:24:11.540 the porcupine. Yes. You can feel the rabbit. Feel the rabbit, sir. Like, I just want to

00:24:16.280 say that to anybody who's trolling, you'd be like, sir, touch the rabbit right here. Next

00:24:20.320 page. Just focus. Don't get too overwhelmed. I know. I feel this. I feel the same way too

00:24:24.400 about that. As far as like, when you feel enough of them, you're kind of like, all right,

00:24:29.440 well, same shit, different day. Now I feel like when I, if I do respond to hate, it's

00:24:34.620 got to be like, I have something really funny to say, or I just think it would be funny to

00:24:38.480 watch them get fucked up. Like that also makes me laugh. So sometimes I'll just make it the

00:24:42.440 center point of something and then they all, they get fucked up on their own. Like my, all

00:24:45.820 my followers go over there.

00:24:47.280 I love watching you do that because in my brain, it's like, uh, have you ever seen like all

00:24:52.520 of the balls in a bingo thing being turned? And so all of them have gotten put in there and

00:24:57.060 I'm like, all right, drew picked in 58. Who is that motherfucker? And you just light

00:25:02.240 his ass up. Yes. The magic number, the magic number. And Oh, you do it so well because you

00:25:08.700 don't, you don't tag them. Somehow the internet always finds a way to figure out who you're

00:25:12.820 talking about. But like, it's so brilliant. Cause then, cause then we don't all know where

00:25:17.980 to go to see who it is. So then they also don't quite get the clout. Yeah, exactly. Which

00:25:22.660 is crazy. It's brilliant. I've even told people before, like, cause they're like, why don't

00:25:26.240 you ever tag them? And I'm like, I don't tag them because there's no free promo on my fucking

00:25:31.320 page. Right. Like, and also like that never worked out. And it could have been any of

00:25:34.420 them in the little lottery. In the lottery. You got lucky. Lucky you. I've even told people

00:25:40.060 to like some, some men have actually like tagged me and been like, I don't care if you find

00:25:44.080 me fatty to which I I've made a video in response to it. And then they're like, why would

00:25:48.500 you do that to me? Why would you dog pile me like that? You tagged me and you told me to

00:25:52.580 come find you. I did even once I've told, like, I've done it for so long now that when

00:25:57.360 I'm getting like an influx of hate, like, which I get all the time, but if it's like

00:26:01.060 every single comment is hate and it's all from a burner or a dude, I'm always like, okay,

00:26:05.100 someone's talking about me. That's how I know someone, someone has talked about me, but

00:26:08.720 they're too much of a bitch to tag me. Cause I can't find it in my mentions. So one time

00:26:12.900 I made a video recently where I was like, okay, someone's talking about me. I can't find

00:26:17.940 them, which probably means they've either blocked me or it's on a different platform, which

00:26:21.380 has happened to like, sometimes they'll make, there are like 30 minute YouTube videos about

00:26:25.380 me. Like white men literally just talking about like, what a fucking like horrible, like man,

00:26:33.120 like they call me a man woman. Like they call, they're just being transphobic towards me saying

00:26:36.460 I'm a man. And then like, they call my boyfriend a cuck. Like they say all these, all this crazy

00:26:40.500 shit. It's like 45 minute long videos. And that's how I find out they make them is literally

00:26:45.500 because they come to my page and they started like, I watched so-and-so's video about

00:26:49.940 you. But the other day I made one and I'm like, I can't find them. So this is me. Uh,

00:26:54.440 just like, I'm literally dispatching the troops. I need all of you guys. Oh, you don't want

00:26:57.980 to do that. I was like, everybody report back. They about to hit them white bands and hack

00:27:01.980 into the mainframe. Oh man. This is consider this an assignment. Okay. Go ahead and dispatch

00:27:07.040 report back. You're fine. How long did it take them to find them? It took them like a couple

00:27:10.700 hours and they found him a couple. Someone was like queen. I found him. I found him. And they're

00:27:15.000 like sending me his at. And I was like, thank you for your service. Appreciate you. Damn.

00:27:19.040 Extra rations for you this month. Literally like why you could literally like turn over

00:27:25.180 and take a nap. People went and found this man. Oh, that's exciting. One time in the very

00:27:32.520 early days of me doing this, I was probably like my first full year doing this. Yeah. I

00:27:36.900 got, um, I was getting a whole bunch of bullshit about some guy. That's why I knew it was on

00:27:41.140 another platform because I couldn't find it on TikTok. And it turns out some guy did

00:27:44.900 like a hour and a half long live stream on YouTube, but then cut it down and didn't put

00:27:51.540 it on YouTube. He put it behind a paywall on Patreon. Okay. And I was like, what point

00:27:56.280 for you? Yeah. Like creativity, I guess. But I was like, you're a bitch. You hit it behind

00:28:00.600 a paywall and I can't see it. Then one of my followers paid the money to watch it and

00:28:05.720 then screen recorded it and sent it to me. And you're not supposed to do that on

00:28:09.940 Patreon. Of course. Of course. They're like, don't worry. I paid the entry fee, but then

00:28:13.860 I canceled my membership. Wow. There he is. Like women in STEM. Women in STEM. I was

00:28:21.200 like, not you Trojan horsing into there. That's. Sneaking in. Epic. I mean, I loved

00:28:26.740 you before, but that like the, the real like henchman of it all is epic. I know. I joke

00:28:33.540 about it. I'm like, I feel like I'm in prison and I'm killing people from inside. Yeah.

00:28:36.540 This is a full like cartel, like organized system because you didn't ask them to join

00:28:42.420 their Patriot. I really want to know how many people were in that Patriot. I know. I'm

00:28:47.000 sure. How did his video do? I have no idea. I hope you made good money off of it, but he

00:28:52.300 said a bunch of crazy shit about me. Oh, I'm sure. The conspiracies. Have you ever seen like

00:28:56.640 crazy things made up about you? No, I definitely see like a friend has sent me like a friend on

00:29:02.920 Facebook, which means you probably, we probably were friends at some point. Right. Cause when

00:29:06.260 is the last time I used Facebook? But they sent me like, girl, you know, this Reddit thread

00:29:10.040 is about you and your man and the Lord. And I was like, girl, we love a great piece of

00:29:15.000 fiction. Y'all have fun. Fan fiction. We love fan fiction. Truly. Wattpad. I, I on Reddit.

00:29:21.980 How do you do on Reddit? Horrible. They have wanted posters in my face all over Reddit.

00:29:26.620 They fucking hate me. Dead or alive. Oh yeah. Okay. Has anybody ever like, I know you can't

00:29:32.480 share this, but has anybody ever like, okay, you ate with that take? Like every now and then

00:29:36.400 I'll see something when I, especially when I used to read comments and I'm like, all right,

00:29:40.060 my ends are fried. Like now you had me there. Like I do need a haircut. You, you, you ate with

00:29:45.880 that. Yeah. Sometimes, sometimes. Yeah. Most of the time though, when I get those, they're

00:29:50.200 most of the time from not, they're from women or other anyone else. Like a clever, we like a

00:29:55.680 clever. Yeah. I love a clever read. I'm, I'm super into those. Oh my God. They're not

00:30:00.600 very creative. I was pregnant. Right. And I was, uh, like sleeping on my, like, there's

00:30:06.400 like a little pregnancy pillow just to make it more comfortable for you. And one time I

00:30:10.080 walked into the room and Ben was like taking a nap on my pregnancy pillow. At one time it

00:30:14.340 was like, Ben, if you don't get your fat ass off of Amber's pregnancy pillow, you're like,

00:30:18.900 Oh, I was like, I'm sorry. That's just fucking hilarious. Or he told me like a couple of weeks

00:30:25.700 ago, he was like, I tried to make a video on my own. It was, somebody was like, leave

00:30:29.580 the comedy to Amber loser. And I was like, they're like, Hey, he was like, is this you?

00:30:35.920 I was like, I promise it's not me, but they did eat with them. Cause you should have asked

00:30:42.680 me before you posted this bullshit. It was like 10 seconds too long. You know what I'm saying?

00:30:45.780 Well, are you going to take the feedback or not? They have a point. Sometimes they will

00:30:52.100 like, especially if they're like, we loved this, but the video was a hair too long. I'm

00:30:56.000 like, fair. Like that's a good read. Yeah. It's like constructive feedback. What's up?

00:31:02.000 Somebody was like, since I can hear shit you said because all that dog lint on your shirt.

00:31:06.900 And I was like, there was a lot of dog hair. There was a dog, there was dog hair on my shirt.

00:31:12.820 Like they gagged me. I've been gagged like that. And it's always like, it's people who

00:31:17.220 love you, but they're like giving you and you're like, all right. Yeah. Yeah. Great video. But

00:31:22.620 the lashes need to be redone. You're like, that's happened to me. That's happened to me a couple

00:31:26.140 of times. They're like, Oh, you look so pretty in this. But like, I really hate that your lashes

00:31:29.400 pointing a little bit down on your left eye. I'm like, don't look at me that close.

00:31:35.120 My last check is going through something. And I was like me fixing it in the back. Damn,

00:31:38.960 you're right. You're right. You actually, you kind of got me. Yeah. Every now and then

00:31:42.560 I should give like a little trophy to be like, okay, you did good. And I did get some new

00:31:46.040 shoes. I had a girl once. I joke about this all the time with my creator friends. I'm

00:31:51.720 sure you get them too, but it's like the, cause I, one of the most asked questions I

00:31:55.380 get is like, what's, if you ever gotten something actually mean that you were like, damn, that

00:31:58.920 was actually a good one. Like from a hater, like a straight up, like horrible guy. And I was

00:32:02.660 like, no, never. Um, they're not funny or creative at all. That's kind of like the whole

00:32:06.260 point where it's easy for me to dunk on them. Yeah. But the shit that I have gotten that

00:32:09.680 is actually mean, but mean, funny and not intentionally mean is always from fans. And

00:32:15.240 like recently I got one that was like, this girl was like, you know, I'm such a big fan.

00:32:19.160 Love your content. Oh, I love it so much. Ooh, that's the setup. Yeah. It's always like,

00:32:23.340 you know, shit sandwich. And then she was like, but you know, mostly I love, um, like your

00:32:29.100 outfit picks. Like, cause I, you know, I'm tall too and blah, blah, blah. But what she really

00:32:33.480 wrote was, you know, especially like, I also have big manly shoulders and the fact that

00:32:41.320 you wear strapless things and tank tops, it makes me want to try it and be more confident

00:32:46.760 about my big shoulders. Like I have huge, like she said, I have a really thick neck and

00:32:52.220 like big traps and like, you make me feel better about that. Okay. First of all, how fucking

00:32:59.340 dare you? Second of all, I was like, what's like, what's horrible about that too? It was

00:33:03.220 like, I love working out shoulders and back. That's my favorite thing to do, but not like

00:33:07.800 that. Not like that. I don't want the attention. You make me more comfortable. Oh yeah. I definitely

00:33:15.020 would get that after like, I love seeing moms like you who don't care about their weight

00:33:18.580 post baby. You're like, Oh, I didn't know I was in that delegation. I've actually been

00:33:25.580 looking for a trainer, but also like, this is about what I was eating for the day. That's

00:33:31.360 nothing to do with. She literally just DM that to me. My big manly shoulders. Oh yeah. Okay.

00:33:35.940 No, for sure. They love that. Or even when they say like, Oh, the makeup's improving. Like

00:33:40.540 you'll be like, or like, we're almost there with the makeup. You're like, bitch, let me see

00:33:47.480 your face. Let me see your mug because this is a picture of flowers in your background and

00:33:53.040 all of your grandkids. Let me see you Pearl. Cause I love, I love lash extensions. I get

00:33:58.100 them all the time. And, uh, that's what I'm saying. I love them. And now that I like do

00:34:03.360 this for a living, I don't have, there's longer periods of time where I don't have them because

00:34:06.700 I'm doing glam a lot. So like they just, they fall out faster when you do them. And

00:34:11.240 so like you're a strip girly now. Yeah. It's like, I got to do both. I got to live in both

00:34:15.120 worlds. And sometimes when I film videos with no lashes, they're like, God, I almost didn't

00:34:20.220 recognize you. Cause you have no lashes or they'll say like, you look so much better

00:34:23.620 without those. You should never get those again. You're going to have to pry them out

00:34:27.580 of my fucking dead. Literally. Oh my God. I'm getting them forever. I don't care. It's

00:34:31.740 like, I don't care. Truly stepping into like the matrix. Like you, you need a lash. Like

00:34:36.900 you can't, once you lash, you can never lash. I'm telling you. I told one of my girlfriends

00:34:40.860 once she, cause I, when I started getting them, she's like, Hey, do you like lash extensions?

00:34:44.720 Are they worth it? I was like, yes. 1000% they are. And she was like, okay, well I'm going to

00:34:48.800 try a lash lift first. Cause she's like a natural girly. So she's like, I'm gonna try

00:34:51.620 a lash lift first. Oh, I can't stand those. They're such a waste of money to me. They

00:34:55.640 are. Cause they don't even last that long. They don't even last that long. I think I

00:34:59.220 got one once and I was like, I need my money back. You literally like blew a kiss on each

00:35:05.460 of my eyelashes. Right. What's going on? Like what's been lifted? Nothing. It's my spirits

00:35:12.880 apparently. Right. And then for only 20 minutes. And then she told me she got that and she

00:35:17.080 said it was all right. But then she got lash extensions and she's like, I'm honestly

00:35:20.160 kind of pissed off at you. Cause now I feel like I'm the ugliest bitch alive when I don't

00:35:24.000 have them. And I was like, I told you that. And you are. And so am I. And I am too.

00:35:30.780 I think that's why, uh, I love getting that kind of feedback from people. Cause it's like

00:35:35.620 silly and funny. Sometimes it's like your sibling. Yeah, exactly. Like your sibling will

00:35:40.980 take a dig and they think that they're your sibling too. So you're like, you're, you're a

00:35:45.280 cousin at best. Let's not get a colleague. Honestly, I know one time my sister, this was

00:35:51.220 like a year or two ago. She goes, Oh dude, I saw the video you posted today. I'm like,

00:35:55.140 Oh, did you? She goes, yeah, that was the funniest one you posted in a while.

00:35:58.600 I yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. I've been posting for two years. Oh, okay. In a while. In a while.

00:36:04.840 She's like, well, yeah. And I was like, okay. Okay. Yep. Oh, is that the end? Okay. And you're

00:36:09.720 like, well, what about these reels? I'm like, well, hold on now. I pull up like my best hits

00:36:15.000 on YouTube. Yeah. See, your sister does that. My mom does that. Oh, nice. She's good. She's

00:36:21.680 like, Oh, we're doing some new material. Yeah. Cause she's like the rest of that shit you've

00:36:26.020 been doing is tired. So I was going to say, glad you brought it up. I'm glad you brought

00:36:30.960 it up. We were doing a podcast for a while, but now we decided to wrap it. But we at, in

00:36:34.880 the beginning of the pod, I mean, she had notes on each episode. She's like, we, we

00:36:40.140 lean too much in the Southern accent at this part, like maybe four, four 24 in like we can

00:36:46.060 and we brought it back. She's a critic now. Right. I'm like, wow. Like, Oh, you have

00:36:51.600 notes. Notes. Well, cause you know, she's like, I've had notes your whole life about everything

00:36:56.200 that you've done. So why would the internet be any different? Yeah. She's like, well, I figured

00:36:59.400 you wanted feedback. Right. I'm trying to make it better. You're like, okay, no, for sure. Unsolicited

00:37:04.440 all the time. Okay. We're going to go into our topic. Our topic for today is horrible

00:37:10.220 men online who promote like treating their wives like accessories instead of partners,

00:37:14.500 obviously like, and, um, and here my producer Amber is reversing this exact mentality by building

00:37:19.920 a comedy brand around her husband being the accessory in their partnership. Yes. We love

00:37:24.120 that. Have you seen the new like trad wife trend on TikTok? Yes, I have. It's crazy. I don't

00:37:29.700 understand. Well, the creator in me is like, okay, sure. Yeah. This is a, sure. This is

00:37:38.140 like, you want to do something new that hasn't been done. I always feel like white people

00:37:42.400 business. I'm not going to get in it. Right. Right. I'll watch it from afar. It's interesting

00:37:45.800 because it's like, it's trad wife stuff. And then it's like, well, I'm not a trad wife,

00:37:49.480 but I do make homemade cereal for my children every morning. So you're like, you're kind of slipping

00:37:53.980 into that as well. And so I'm always thinking about like, what, what are all the pieces at

00:37:59.000 play that, that had, that made this video come to life? Like, is your husband shooting

00:38:02.560 it and editing, editing it? I just know that. Cause like, that's what my husband helps me

00:38:05.800 do. Like in the videos where people are like, she's so fucking mean to him. I'm like, Ben

00:38:09.020 edited that video. Like, you don't, you actually don't even know that. Yeah. It's fun. And he

00:38:12.740 scheduled it to post. Yeah. And, and like, I didn't even do a final look of it. So I'm always

00:38:17.700 like, do these trad wives like brainstorm with their husband, what they are? Because I know

00:38:23.740 how hard it is to be a content creator and post consistently and come up with concepts

00:38:27.880 and all of that. So I'm like, especially if you're a partner, right? I'm like, who, what's

00:38:32.340 actually going on behind the scenes? Or are they actually like, you're dead inside. I've

00:38:36.680 thought that too, even about men who make misogynistic content. Like there have been

00:38:39.760 some men where I'm like, do you even believe this? Yeah. You don't believe it. Or are you

00:38:42.640 just doing this? But it works. Cause it like, it makes you infamous instead of famous. Like

00:38:47.020 it gives you like some sort of notoriety and you're just, you want to be famous. They just want

00:38:50.140 any attention. Exactly. At any cost. By any means necessary. Right. But if they

00:38:53.660 saw you in person, they would be like, Oh my God, Drew. Yeah. Oh, that's just a character

00:38:57.100 I play. Like that type of bullshit. Which like, there are men who are for real that way. And

00:39:01.460 then there are men like that, which is like, I see what you mean. It's kind of hard to tell

00:39:04.380 sometimes, especially now. Cause everybody wants to go viral. Everybody wants to go viral.

00:39:08.440 But in the trad wife thing, I always, when men are talking about like, that's what I want

00:39:12.460 kind of deal. I always think like, there are women who exist like that, who like want to be

00:39:17.060 stay at home moms and there's nothing wrong with that. It's more so like, you don't want

00:39:21.260 women who want that. You want women who don't want that. And you want to force them to do

00:39:25.580 it. Cause it makes you feel good. Like it gives you power. Yeah. Like who is the target audience

00:39:30.220 for the trad wife content? I don't know. Cause is it other, right? Cause I don't think it's

00:39:35.260 women. No, it's absolutely not. So it can't be religious women. Yeah. Yeah. Women that hate

00:39:41.900 themselves pretty much. Those will always exist because there's women that hate themselves.

00:39:45.900 Everybody hates themselves a little bit. Yeah. That's like a new level of hate. Yeah. It's like a

00:39:50.060 uppity level of like, it's like, I'm not going to admit I hate myself. I hate you kind of think

00:39:54.200 like they project it out instead of focusing internally. Of course. But I, that's actually

00:39:59.300 really a really good point. Cause then I think they conflate women who like are just stay at

00:40:03.580 home moms and they have supporting husbands. Yeah. It's almost like hard to tell. Cause then

00:40:07.340 like people who are watching both sets of videos, they're like, Oh, well these are all one in the

00:40:11.460 same. Whereas some of them really are trad wives. Some of them are pretending to be trad wives and

00:40:15.480 some of them are just stay at home moms. Yeah. It's the pretending because you could be a stay at home

00:40:19.400 mom and have your shit together. Yeah. Of course. But like friends of mine who I know are stay at

00:40:24.080 home moms, those households are still a mess. Yeah. And my house is a mess. Yeah. And Ben is a

00:40:28.440 stay at home dad. Yeah. So it's like, I know how crazy that stay at home life actually is. It's

00:40:33.680 like, why are you in a cottage dress? Like trying to make it look like it's not that like, like what?

00:40:39.860 So when, when did you go buy the dress? Yeah. Wasn't you watching the kids? Yeah. Yeah. I wonder that too.

00:40:45.400 Yeah. Yeah. I've seen one, I've seen one girl and she makes homemade bread all the time. It's a white

00:40:50.200 lady. Fucking bread. She lives in like Europe or something. I've seen her stuff before, but

00:40:57.140 sometimes she'll spend all day making bread. And I think that's so great. But for me, I don't know

00:41:03.540 what it is about cooking. Oh God. I don't want to do it. No. Hey, no. I'm good. And I love the

00:41:08.640 girlies that do. Like, I like that. Like I have so many skills. You know what I'm saying? Like

00:41:13.260 editing, visualizing things. Being a center of attention. Comedy. Being hilarious. Being

00:41:19.140 beautiful. Like I can't also be good at cooking. Like that would be crazy. I can't be weighed

00:41:24.400 down. That's too many talents on one bitch. You know what I'm saying? God doesn't give with

00:41:27.720 both hands. Absolutely not. He did not give me that skill. I think that's why he didn't give

00:41:31.760 me the gift of singing. Right. I told people, if I could sing, I would be insufferable, bitch.

00:41:36.980 I would grow. I can halfway sing and I'm insufferable. Like I can carry a tune, but I'm

00:41:42.780 not like, you know, Mariah Whitney, but I can sing in a choir. That's good. And I'm

00:41:46.900 you're further in than me. Yeah. I, I hear myself annoying everybody in my family. Everybody.

00:41:53.740 If God gave me that gift. Oh man. I'd be the size of Godzilla and I'd be terrorizing the town.

00:41:58.660 I'd pick up one. If you could sing a little bit. A girl. Can you dance? I can dance.

00:42:02.960 That's a no. I can vibe. Okay. You sure? Yeah. You're like, girl, come on. Look at me. I'm

00:42:06.620 brown. I can dance. Yeah. Right. You got rhythm. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. So, so, so at least you can't

00:42:10.720 like playground dance studio dance. Has anybody ever wanted you to do like the TikTok dances? Every

00:42:15.780 time I'm like, I can't do those. Yeah. No, I'm good. Hey, no. Mostly cause I'm fucking old. Like

00:42:21.660 I'm like, I'm too old for that shit. You're not old. I mean, I feel old sometimes. I'm a million years

00:42:26.820 old in TikTok years. Right. Right. I feel like TikTok years are like dog years. Like

00:42:30.440 they are. We're, we're living seven for every one like fresh young 21 year old. Right. Cause

00:42:35.780 it was hot on the block during the pandemic, which was like definitely dog years. And when

00:42:40.740 now when I tell people how old I'm going to be, I'm going to be 29 this year. Uh, and when

00:42:43.700 I tell people how old I'm going to be, they're like, Oh, Oh, Oh, Oh, I'm 22. Yeah. I can

00:42:50.040 fucking tell. I can tell by the way the life flashed before your eyes when I said I was going

00:42:54.720 to be 29. Like you can fall asleep on the couch and not be in pain the next day. Got

00:42:59.620 you. Sometimes I'll get invited to stuff and I'm like, what time does it start? Oh my

00:43:03.460 gosh. That is the, the crossroad I constantly face when I'm trying to get back into standup

00:43:08.900 comedy. Oh yeah. Cause like, yep. You bet. You bet. 11 PM. Your slot. You're like 11 PM.

00:43:15.580 I have a toddler. Like I would be woken up at 4 AM to like a sticky hand slap. Talk about

00:43:21.800 something. I mean, what does a zebra say? Like that is my morning every morning. Do

00:43:26.540 you know what a zebra says, Drew? I still don't know. I never have an answer to that

00:43:30.060 question. So I is going to get that answer. She's going to ask you every morning. Please

00:43:35.000 tell me what a zebra. I'm always like not black enough for the black zebras. Not, not white

00:43:39.360 enough. I literally don't know what to tell her. You know what I'm saying? But that is how

00:43:42.500 I wake up every morning. Damn. A sticky hand slapping. You know, recently I actually, I can't

00:43:49.420 eat hot chips anymore. I don't think. Oh yeah. You gotta, you know, I told, yes, that acid

00:43:56.660 reflux, bitch, the way you have to sit up at night. If you eat too late, girl, I told

00:44:01.320 people, I made a video about this. Cause I was, I got drunk at the, at a work event

00:44:05.180 once. And then I was hung over two days later, which is me being fucking old. And I was literally

00:44:10.560 telling people, I'm like, let this heed my warning. Right. You're young. When you get past

00:44:14.820 25, bitch, it's alcohol and you develop allergies. Don't know what the fuck that

00:44:19.260 is. I woke up one where I was like, I can't see. I can't see. I was like, what is happening?

00:44:24.620 And Ben has horrible visions. So every morning he's like looking for his glasses. And that

00:44:29.500 was the one morning he was like, not so fun. Yeah. Because when he pisses me off, I just

00:44:36.380 grab those glasses in the morning. You know, it's like, remember last night's fight? Good

00:44:40.280 luck with the first half of the day. Good luck. Good luck. Cause he cannot, but allergies

00:44:46.200 is a new level of like, my body hates me. I know. I'm like, what is going on? Like I,

00:44:52.060 there's certain things I can't eat anymore. Like my lactose intolerance. I feel like I've

00:44:56.340 had, but once I pass 25 girl, it's whooping my ass. Like I can't, if I find, I'm like,

00:45:02.760 is there heavy cream in it? And they're like, yeah, I'm like, I can't have it. Oh, now you're

00:45:06.020 that person when the waiter comes by allergies. Well, well, heavily lactose intolerant. Unless

00:45:11.660 you want me to shit my pants in this booth. I wouldn't bring that to me. And don't have

00:45:15.280 a baby. Your bladder can't hold like it used to. So when you have to go, you have to go

00:45:20.440 like right that second. Even I had her two years ago. And if I had to pee right now, they

00:45:26.340 would have to pause. Like it's so bad. Like I've almost peed on myself and probably peed a

00:45:32.260 little bit on myself so many times. And you know how it is when you make it to the bathroom

00:45:35.720 and then there's a line and you're like, oh, well I'm going. I'm going on myself in

00:45:39.820 the line. Sorry guys. Like I had to, I had a baby. So I had a baby. Like what do you want

00:45:44.480 me to do? It's still very hard to hold my bladder. I can't even imagine. And the, for

00:45:49.720 the spicy chip thing, like I just, every, when I wake up, if I have hot chips now and I wake

00:45:54.720 up in the morning, I feel like I have like sour stomach, like hungover stomach, like bubble

00:46:00.220 guts type of shit. And I was like, I literally called my mom the other morning. I was like,

00:46:03.780 bro, I'm like sick. Like I feel fucking so sick. And then she was like, well, what'd you

00:46:07.780 eat yesterday? And I told her like, I ain't real standard stuff. And then I had some hot

00:46:11.200 popcorn, like hot Cheeto popcorn. That first of all sounds amazing. It's so good. I would

00:46:16.260 have took the risk. You just got to have some Tums or something on you. I got to pop a couple

00:46:20.120 Tums. Dude, I told her, I was like, I can't, I don't think I can eat them anymore. And then

00:46:24.120 I didn't eat them for like three days. And then I tried again. Right. Same shit happened

00:46:27.960 to me. I love that. You're like, oh, this almost killed me. Let me just try it one more

00:46:30.900 time. Just to make sure it wasn't a fluke. Just in case. Just to be sure. Just to be

00:46:35.800 absolutely 100% positive. That's the worst. Yeah. I'm like that with, I have to stretch

00:46:40.500 more before just regular activities. Like I have to stretch before I walk the dog. Like

00:46:45.560 that is a task that has to be done at least three times a day. And I'm like, let me stretch.

00:46:50.140 Like, no, literally now me and Ben have to like stretch before sex, like for real. Like, is

00:46:54.960 it like, is this going to be a level 10 kind of night or like, like a level two energy?

00:46:58.500 Well, how deep of a stretch do I have to do? I just need to know what your game plan

00:47:01.020 is. Right. Like, is this, okay. It's been a while. Let's stretch for real. And it's so

00:47:05.900 unsexy. You guys are warming up. Yeah. You have to warm up. You're rolling out on the foam

00:47:10.300 roller. You can't just jump in. I've been watching like a lot of Sex and the City because they

00:47:12.720 put all the episodes on Netflix and everything like that. And so, you know, you'll see these

00:47:16.000 scenes where like, even like a 35 year old Carrie is like doing all of that, like

00:47:20.960 walking into the apartment, kissing this guy. I was like, you gonna fuck up your neck? Like, I know your neck hurts.

00:47:25.320 Your neck hurts. Wake up stuck looking this way. I go to a concert and my body hurts the

00:47:29.580 next day because of like this motion. Yeah. Well, we talked about Coachella. Like we

00:47:33.600 didn't, I didn't go this year. Obviously. I don't know if you're going this weekend.

00:47:37.520 No. Yeah. But even after my first, like even last year when I went, my first day after I

00:47:45.840 felt like I got hit by a fucking bus. Yeah. And all I did was walk a lot and stand. So not

00:47:50.480 much. You know what it is too? It's like maybe, maybe the text bracket.

00:47:54.920 It's different now. I don't know, but I can't do cheap liquor anymore. I literally

00:47:57.980 can't. Like that'll be what the difference is. Yeah. It's cheap anything. Like you can't

00:48:02.280 like what you could do in your early twenties. Can't do it anymore. You cannot. You need

00:48:05.800 like high quality versions of it. Cheap clothes will break you out. Like cheap alcohol, cheap

00:48:11.200 skincare. Yeah. Oh yeah. When I was in college and I was broke as fuck, I used, I literally

00:48:15.360 bought, I think it was like 500 makeup wipes for $1. And it's probably cause they were

00:48:20.940 sandpaper, but like I was literally, I was doing it and I was using them. That sounds

00:48:25.000 unwise. Yeah. And my skin, I was like, eh, it's fine. And then my sister was like, what

00:48:30.480 are these? She was like, where did you even get these? Cause I don't even remember the

00:48:33.480 brand. It was like an off brand, like some, I don't even remember the name. And she was

00:48:37.080 like, don't use these anymore. They're so bad for your skin. I'm like, it's fine. If I use

00:48:40.860 that shit now, I'd do it and just be clean muscle all right now. I just fucking scrape

00:48:45.960 all my fucking skin off. Just right off like a skinny. Okay. I'm going to read some of

00:48:51.600 these, uh, TikToks. Okay. So in this video, a man is talking on a podcast saying, my wife

00:48:57.980 stays home and she's submissive. So she looks at me as the leader of the home. When we have

00:49:02.560 a disagreement, guess whose word is the last call? Mine. The caption of the video says, get

00:49:10.060 a wife who believes in sex and teamwork and your life will make sense. Oh, S-I-N-C-E.

00:49:17.020 Yeah. Yeah. He said since. And that's exactly how his, his spelling was. Okay. Well, lots

00:49:21.920 to unpack. My wives don't believe in sex. Like what is happening? I know. I was just

00:49:25.980 want to say. They love to hit the block being like, make sure your wife is giving you sex

00:49:29.820 on the regular. Like if you're doing a good job, she probably will. She will. Yeah. But

00:49:34.540 if you're doing a, a two pump and go to sleep. Yeah. She, no, that's not a vibe.

00:49:39.560 Even recently too, I was like defending the book talk girls because these men are getting

00:49:44.640 pissed off that they're reading like fairy smut books. Like there's like sex scenes in the

00:49:48.020 books, right? Oh, come now. And they're like fairy, fairy men, whatever the fuck. And

00:49:51.520 somehow, yeah, that really like bothers them for whatever fucking, they're like, they're

00:49:55.800 reading porn. Okay. Yeah. Even if they were, who gives a shit? Right. Who cares? Like,

00:50:01.100 yeah, we can't watch it now. We can't read it. Like they're also using their imagination.

00:50:06.040 Like there's no visuals at all. They're just like, you know, I think it's just another

00:50:10.560 thing they have to feel inferior to is like an imaginary man. They should. Cause I'm sure

00:50:14.160 that fairy smut goes crazy. I read regular smut and it goes crazy. So I can't even imagine

00:50:19.600 with the wings and shit. It's fucking crazy. And so like what I was talking about and I'm

00:50:23.420 like, you don't give a fuck that women are reading porn. What you care about is like women

00:50:27.780 are exercising sexual autonomy. Right. So they're like saying that they're consenting and saying

00:50:32.480 they want to have sex and not to procreate. It's just like, because it feels good. Yeah.

00:50:36.360 Like you can't just want pleasure, bitch. Yeah. And they give it like, which like as soon

00:50:42.020 as that happens, I'm like, all of a sudden everyone's the fucking Pope. Like everybody's

00:50:45.340 the fucking Pope. Bring that energy to the bedroom. Bring that. I'll do a lot of this and not

00:50:53.780 enough of this. You know what I mean? Yeah. Let's get back. You will put a half of that energy

00:50:58.360 into learning some anatomy, you know, too much of this, too much of this. You need to go

00:51:03.960 put them fairy wings on and make a fucking move. Yeah. Like just like get some reps. Like

00:51:09.000 fuck. I don't understand. I'm like, I don't understand worrying about something that you're

00:51:13.300 not even having. First of all, I would really love to see one of those podcasts talk about

00:51:18.080 sex and talk about like, and here are all the fun ways that I seduce my wife too. And here's

00:51:23.780 all the cool positions that we do. Here's how I keep her happy. Cause it's always just

00:51:28.280 like women should believe in sex. Okay. I'm listening. I got my pen and paper. Talk

00:51:33.320 to me about it. Let's talk about it. What's the course? I want to believe. Let's teach

00:51:37.900 me why I should believe. Teach me. Better yet. Show me. Stand up on that podcast, Mike,

00:51:42.620 and show me what you working with. And they're like, ah, horse. Right. Right. It's like,

00:51:46.200 wow, as a married man. Okay. So shut up. Well, I haven't had a, I actually haven't had

00:51:51.140 sex in years, but I just wish the internet used to be like, like the Maury show. It's

00:51:54.400 like, now let's bring out your wife. And she'll be like, I'm actually not satisfied

00:51:59.020 more. Not even a little bit. Not a little. Or they're like, let's bring her out. And

00:52:02.460 there's no one there. Right. Or I really feel like this, the video that I watched

00:52:06.840 of that guy on the pod, I'm like, there's no way. It's just like a blow up doll at the

00:52:11.100 house. You can always call your wife. Like that's a vibe. Yeah. I feel like that's your

00:52:16.080 fantasy. That's your fantasy. No judgments. I feel like too. It's just, again, it's one of

00:52:21.180 those, like, there's a whole lot of talking, not a lot of doing. I feel like those who

00:52:25.720 can't do teach kind of thing. Yeah. So I'm like men who like, first of all, men who are

00:52:30.280 fucking hanging brain and men who are really good in bed, don't talk about it. Like they

00:52:34.600 don't need to like broadcast into the world. They don't need to be like, Hey, guess what?

00:52:38.320 Guess what? And I was like, also the frequency with which you want to have sex, it does not

00:52:42.960 automatically equate to good sex. Like you said, like just because you want to do it all

00:52:47.640 the time. Correct. Doesn't mean that you're good at all. I moved to LA like a year and

00:52:51.860 a half ago. And so Ben and I have really been like exploring some of the, like the kink

00:52:56.020 scene in LA and you'll go to these like vanilla kink party, like vanilla ones are where there's

00:53:01.620 no sexual play, but everybody's talking about sexual things. There's a lot of people there

00:53:05.540 that I've met there that are like, I joined the kink community cause I don't even like having

00:53:09.460 a lot of sex. I just like being kinky. I like the foreplay part of it, but I don't really

00:53:13.160 have a lot of sexual intercourse. And you'll meet like, those are the times where I've

00:53:16.780 met men who are like really into sex and different elements of sex. And you would never see them

00:53:22.800 on those podcasts. Like these are the men with like, they like the dungeon shit, you know

00:53:27.040 what I'm saying? And they're not making content. I'm like, you need to make content. You need

00:53:30.900 to make content. Cause you actually know what you're talking about. You know how to lock.

00:53:34.220 Start a school. Like, you know, flogging and shit. Like you need to get on the mic and

00:53:37.220 do that. And less of these guys that are like, so sex. It's like, okay, go on.

00:53:42.360 They're all, well, I'm not having any, but I do have a lot of thoughts.

00:53:44.640 Right. The sex and teamwork. What are we fucking playing dodgeball? What's the teamwork

00:53:51.120 part? Because y'all don't want it to be teamwork. Y'all want her cooking and cleaning.

00:53:54.660 Yeah, for real. That's why it's like, well, I only have two hands. Right. I can't jerk

00:53:59.020 you off and clean at the same time. Which one do you want me to do? Yeah. I got to

00:54:02.160 prioritize. They're exhausting. The comments on this, this one says works in some households

00:54:07.940 also a lot less stressful. Talking about like a submissive woman. If you want someone who blindly

00:54:13.740 follows orders, like, why don't you get a dog? Right. Like they'll blindly follow an

00:54:18.420 order. They really will. Like if you train them well enough, they'll do anything. I just,

00:54:22.640 I had a dog. Even a good dog won't blindly follow orders. That's true. That is actually

00:54:26.820 true. What's up with y'all? Get a plant. Or a Roomba because you could tell it what to

00:54:32.980 do. Or a Roomba. There you go. I'm not about that Roomba life. You got a Roomba? Yeah.

00:54:36.540 Actually, um, do you know Carlo? He's, yeah, yeah, yeah. He actually got us, me and my

00:54:41.640 boyfriend, a Roomba for a housewarming gift. Cause we have a lot of time. I love Carlo for

00:54:45.540 that. Yeah, yeah, yeah. He's the best. But he got it. He's like, did you guys like my

00:54:48.880 gifts? I was like, dude, I fucking love it. My dogs aren't a big fan of it. Like they,

00:54:52.420 they get nervous around it. Of course. They just follow it everywhere, but it's good. It's

00:54:56.420 nice. White people shit. Okay. Yeah, yeah, yeah. When I used to grow up seeing that, I was

00:54:59.660 like, damn, you guys got money, huh? Yeah. See, going back to our cheap shit era, I need to get

00:55:04.400 rid of my Dyson and get on that Roomba life, baby. Wait, but that Dyson vacuum? For pet

00:55:08.840 hair? Dude, my sister has one and she said it's fucking awesome. It is awesome. Is it

00:55:12.980 the best vacuum ever? Dude, I gotta get one. But it doesn't do itself, you know? So it

00:55:17.320 is, it is missing that element. It needs to be self-cleaning. Of course. That's a, that's

00:55:22.920 actually, I honestly, I just, I have like a sketch of you like putting a little skirt on

00:55:26.500 a Roomba and like that podcast guy is like, that is his wife. I love that. He's dressed like

00:55:31.160 a French maid. Yes. And it's got like a little bread basket.

00:55:34.400 Because she made bread. Obviously she, all the time in the world, 24 hours and she did

00:55:38.840 all of that. Uh, this one says, damn, that's a dream life. And then the creator wrote back

00:55:43.700 truly is teamwork is what this is about and understanding roles as husband and wife. Like

00:55:48.200 you said, what about, did you teach like dare courses before you decided to start a podcast?

00:55:53.520 Like what are you even talking about? Part of that is teamwork too, where you tell her to

00:55:57.540 do stuff and she does it. Like how is that teamwork? That is such man teamwork. I was telling

00:56:02.440 the other day, it'll be like, I was like, all right, so I want you to do the dishes. He's

00:56:06.740 like, yep, we'll do the dishes. I was like, no, we is code for me. I need it. I need to

00:56:10.940 hear you say you about to do it. Like, have you ever been talking to your man about something

00:56:14.600 like that? And he's like, yeah, we're going to go do this. So you're like, you know that

00:56:16.920 I'm going to do that. And you're, and you're going to sit there. It's like Thanksgiving

00:56:20.880 day. Yeah. We can't wait to host Thanksgiving. It's like, we really, we, and I don't even

00:56:26.060 cook. So I'm like, how did I end up hosting Thanksgiving? I'm at home foods, buying turkeys

00:56:30.820 to like reheat. You know, what's funny is on Thanksgiving last year, I wanted to make,

00:56:37.040 what did I make? Oh, mac and cheese, but I wanted to make one that wouldn't hurt my fucking

00:56:41.180 stomach. So we did like a lactose free. Oh yeah. Takes fucking forever. First of all,

00:56:47.060 dude, grinding cashews. Oh, I'm out. I bought two, two pound bags of cashews girl over and

00:56:55.480 over again. I helped in the first like 30 minutes. And then I was like, Hey, I like really

00:57:01.960 don't want to do this anymore. Right. And my boyfriend was like, okay, cool. Cause you're

00:57:05.080 slowing me down. Like just great. Get out. Love. Talk about it. Perfect. Cause I don't have

00:57:09.860 to do every task and you don't have to do every task. So what do you love to do? If I hate

00:57:13.800 to do it, can you just take it? Yeah, exactly. We have chores like that too,

00:57:16.940 that I think I'm like, I I'm cool with doing this. And I know you don't like

00:57:20.360 that, but I hate doing that. And I don't like doing that. So it's kind of like

00:57:23.220 tradesies. Right. So like if he hates doing dishes and I hate doing laundry,

00:57:26.580 like he'll do laundry, I'll do dishes kind of thing. And then sometimes we swap,

00:57:30.120 but it's not many. It's nice also because Ben and I have been, been together

00:57:35.020 through so many like different parts of our life together. So of course there was a

00:57:39.080 time where we were living in like a one bedroom that like had tons of mice. And I was

00:57:42.800 like, this is a you problem, my guy. He's like, but they're everywhere. Like I

00:57:46.880 can't set every trap and pick it up. I was like, you gon' do that.

00:57:49.980 So do.

00:57:50.720 It says, well, like picking up a mouse. Like, are you crazy?

00:57:54.680 Oh dude, I hate. You ever picked up a mouse or seen one even?

00:57:57.560 Yeah, I hate them. Never again. Critters. I hate bugs. I hate birds. I hate lots of

00:58:02.560 animals, honestly. Like, I just like don't want any problems. Like don't come near me.

00:58:05.640 Well, a mouse is also a sure sign of like, I have lost control of my life. It's like,

00:58:13.940 I pay the bills on time. I go to work. I'm cleaning. And there's a mouse here.

00:58:18.420 I can't. It's a true sign of like, you're not in control. Like when it runs across the

00:58:25.640 floor, you're like, I'm not in control.

00:58:27.420 You're right. I'm not talking to the mouse. I'm not. I can't, I can't control my own

00:58:30.960 fucking life. Yeah. I can't even keep rodents out of my space. That's what it's like.

00:58:34.640 That's probably one of those things I'd count with like cooking where I'm like, I'm not doing

00:58:37.560 it, which is like bugs of any kind, spiders. Like I'm good. Like if you want to like be

00:58:43.580 the man and do it, I don't give a shit. Yeah. Oh, I love, I love gender shit when, when

00:58:46.800 a mice comes through. I'm like, you got it. You're the man. I submit. I submit. Just get

00:58:50.940 that fucking rat. I'm the most trad wife in the world. I'm like, oh my God, you're so big and strong. I'll bake some fucking

00:58:54.480 bread. As long as I ain't got to touch a mouse. I will say this. So Ben's birthday is on Thursday,

00:59:00.480 which is two days from today. Yes. And I'm going to know tomorrow. It's literally tomorrow. Oh my

00:59:07.500 God. I literally was like, I'm with you. I'm with you. It's literally tomorrow. I'm very convincing.

00:59:11.580 Yeah, you are. I will tell you what your birthday is. You're like, it's not that day, but I was

00:59:14.920 like, she said it with confidence, you know? So I'm going to try today to bake a cake. I've never

00:59:21.200 baked a cake. Ooh, from scratch. Yes. Like a dummy. Okay. I texted my friend even and she was

00:59:27.100 like, do you have a mixer? I was like, no, but I got confidence and a dream and, and I got strong

00:59:32.040 arms. Like, so what? I got willpower. Right. I got fighting me. You know what I'm saying? So what

00:59:37.620 can we do? I'm really going to try hard to make him a cake. Oh, that's so sweet. I love that. I've

00:59:43.240 like, I made him like chocolate covered strawberries once. I was like, look at me so domestic. Oh, I was

00:59:48.540 like, look at me so fucking domestic. And then I only made like five and I was like,

00:59:52.480 that seems good enough. It's like, and then I ate three. Yeah. So we walked in. Well,

00:59:56.520 I had, oh, I made eight, but you know, only five, only made it into the box. So I had to

01:00:01.100 test out. Yeah. Just to make sure they were good. But yeah, he loves, he loves to bake.

01:00:06.180 He loves to cook. I think that works out for us. He bakes too. What a dream. I know Ben

01:00:10.440 makes all of our meals in our home. I have been packed my lunch today. Oh, let's see it. Well,

01:00:15.560 we can rate it now. Cause I haven't, I haven't. Period. It's gonna be like a mukbang for all

01:00:19.480 of us. Wait, I'm sorry. I thought it was right here. That was, that was disappointing. It's

01:00:24.480 behind your chair, I think. Okay. You're like, that was embarrassing. Right when I came here,

01:00:33.240 I like tripped over something. Drew was like, oh shit. No, you're totally fine. Okay. Which

01:00:38.200 first of all, we love a man who makes a lunch for his wifey. Yeah. Well, period. Presentation.

01:00:43.240 Let's take off a point for that. Let's see what's in my lunch today. We got some teriyaki.

01:00:50.220 Ooh. Some jerky. Some turkey jerky. Oh, period. Nice protein energy. I love jerky. These

01:00:56.220 are homemade meals now. We have a salad from Home Foods. Damn. I'm pretty sure this is a

01:01:01.520 couple of days old, but that's okay. Let's see. It's me. I'm probably still gonna eat it.

01:01:07.540 Okay. Okay. Now he made this for real. Okay. I think this is a bagel with some, with some

01:01:14.840 turkey on it. Oh, like a little sandwich. Like a little Sammy. Period. And then he packed

01:01:19.580 some pineapples. Oh, I love. And he cut this pineapple this morning. So he covered all the

01:01:24.620 MyPlate. All the Tupperwares. Food groups. Mm-hmm. And you know. A man. This, this is a man.

01:01:31.100 If you're at home watching, what, what, what are your lunches? We need to start a new

01:01:36.380 trend. Yeah. For real. Cause I'm sure. My, my man. You can pack those, those lunches. Period.

01:01:41.640 Yeah. He packs my lunch for me too. When I come here sometimes like to film, he'll pack

01:01:45.240 me a big bag of snacks. Well, I, they buy lunch here too, but. Don't tell him that. It

01:01:50.120 don't hurt him too. Yeah. He'll buy, he'll pack me like a big thing of snacks for like before

01:01:54.080 and after the show when I have to go home. And then he makes my coffee and like leaves it

01:01:57.880 on the counter for me. He's like, I made your coffee by the way. It's on the counter. I'm

01:02:00.700 like, Oh, thanks. Oh yeah. And I don't have to ask. Love that. Smash. Yeah. We love

01:02:05.660 that. Yeah. I'm gonna take that. Yeah. For sure. Right. Okay. Talked about all kinds

01:02:10.380 of stuff. Lots of relationship stuff, which we love. It's very rare that we both get to

01:02:15.320 talk shit on our male partners together. Cause we love them. We love them. That's why we

01:02:19.280 can hate them. Exactly. That's honestly, it's not real love if you don't make fun of them all

01:02:23.280 the time. What are people who are not laughing in their relationships doing? That's what I'm

01:02:27.580 saying. I really, I really genuinely want to know, like, what are y'all doing?

01:02:31.660 That reminds me the other day we were watching a movie or like a show and we paused it and

01:02:36.000 he goes, have you ever drank alone? And I go, yeah. And I was like, I'm going to tell

01:02:40.520 him a story about when I did. And then I go, what about you? He goes, no, I've never done

01:02:44.360 that. And I was like, Oh, Oh, like getting drunk by yourself. Yeah. I've never done that.

01:02:49.720 That's what I said. But I started laughing at me because I was like the way I thought you

01:02:53.760 were opening the door to a vulnerable conversation. And you were like, yeah, yeah, I've never done

01:02:57.340 that. He's like, imagine drinking alone. I don't, I don't have to imagine it. He was like, no,

01:03:03.680 I've never done that. And we were fucking laughing for like 10 minutes. And I was like, that's so

01:03:07.340 funny. Hey, fuck you by the way. Uh, but that's so funny. I love that last night our, our sitter

01:03:11.900 bailed. We were going to go out, but she got caught up doing something, which is cool. So we literally

01:03:15.820 were like, let's rock, paper, scissors to see who's going to go out. Like somebody's got to get out

01:03:19.720 because one of us has to get out. One of us has to leave the house. So Ben won and he

01:03:23.480 went out. Yeah. And so I obviously drank alone and it was epic. I probably smoked a little

01:03:29.440 bit too. And you had the best night ever. Yeah. Well, you know, once the kid went to sleep,

01:03:33.420 I was like, go, what? Mommy's trying to be sad and depressed about her fucking self.

01:03:39.120 Like this is my knee time. Literally. Honestly, true love. That's what that is.

01:03:45.020 That's true love right there. It's like, no, that's not love ruining it.

01:03:49.720 Anyways, uh, I would love to know what would you say is your best piece of advice

01:03:54.700 for, well, first I'll ask you two part question. First one is how to like have a sustainable

01:04:01.640 long-term relationship where you guys love and support each other equally, like whether

01:04:05.480 it's professionally or emotionally, like what would you say is your best piece of advice

01:04:09.280 for people who are looking for that? Or maybe they're, they don't have that now and they wish

01:04:13.760 that they did. What would you say is your best piece of advice for them? Um, I would say

01:04:18.240 listening to your partner is the most important thing you could possibly do.

01:04:24.220 Um, and just like constantly checking in. Like I really have to be, because so much of

01:04:29.880 our work dynamic and life dynamic is it's the Amber show. I really have to be intentional

01:04:37.280 about asking Ben like, well, how was your day? Like, Oh, he went out with his, uh, you

01:04:43.040 know, he went out by himself last night and met up with some other friends of course at

01:04:46.200 this comedy show. And I was like, I got to remind myself like to ask Ben, like, how was

01:04:51.020 the comedy show? Yeah. And hear about them and try my best not to lean into like, I could

01:04:55.560 have hosted that if it was bad. Like, like not cause it's so hard cause you just feel like

01:04:59.180 a narcissist. You're like, no, no, no. Let me just like ask you how you are and like

01:05:02.940 close my mouth and listen. Like I really think if you want to be, or, or if you're not in

01:05:09.640 a good partnership, it's likely because like you're not being listened to. Yeah. Totally.

01:05:13.860 So listen to your partner, like literally like let them talk and you make a rule to like,

01:05:19.500 I'm going to be quiet. Cause that intentional, very intentional about it. Cause it's so easy

01:05:23.760 to be like, especially with everything going on, like work and kids and marriage. Right.

01:05:28.340 It's easy to get distracted. Yeah. Want to talk about what's going on with you. Like

01:05:32.380 if you went through your whole day, you're like, I didn't ask my partner, how was their

01:05:35.320 day today? Or do you ever get to the end of the day? You're like, I have not kissed

01:05:37.680 my man. Like that's crazy. Yeah. Sometimes you're like, that's crazy. I haven't done

01:05:40.620 that all day. And I always acknowledge it out loud too. But I always, that's such a good

01:05:45.340 point too. Especially when you do a content for a living. Right. And it starts with you.

01:05:49.580 It's like, you want to make sure that they're feeling attended to as much as you are.

01:05:54.600 Cause obviously like that's your whole life is like you're posting, but also like who

01:05:59.680 you are is like your job. Yeah. You know what I mean? Yes. Yes. Yes. Cause that's how I

01:06:03.460 am too. But that's such a good point. And then for the second part question is like, if someone

01:06:09.140 is interested in doing like couples content or things surrounding their relationship and

01:06:14.020 you obviously, we were talking about it before we started recording, like the balance of it

01:06:17.660 all is very fine. Right. Now that you have a baby too. Um, what would you say is your best

01:06:22.160 piece of advice for them? If they're going to make content surrounding their family, their

01:06:25.280 partner, like as far as balance goes, like what would you say is your best piece of advice

01:06:29.360 for that? Well, I'll start with a don't do. I would highly recommend if you're like starting

01:06:35.280 content making at the courtship and on, I say do not try to be couples content. Like don't

01:06:43.240 be like, here's our first date together. Come with me. Here's my person who I've been dating

01:06:46.900 for a month or whatever. Like I didn't start making content with Ben until we were like

01:06:50.980 at least into our second year of marriage. Yeah. And by that point we were together for

01:06:55.240 six years. Yeah. So you do need a solid, strong foundation. Foundation. I'm sure like y'all

01:07:01.260 were like, there's no, I really don't know if you could create the way you do and then start

01:07:07.060 dating. That's true. Like, like y'all, y'all being together and solid for a while. Cause

01:07:11.380 you, cause when shit is spiraling, you're like, I need you. Yeah. Cause the internet

01:07:15.220 can be like, I've definitely had a breakdown based on some internet stuff. Like I'm kind

01:07:20.080 of out of that era now, but like, I would be crazy. Any, any creator has gotten frustrated

01:07:24.860 with the internet and needed somebody to be their rock with that because nobody gets it,

01:07:28.600 but other creators. Yeah, exactly. So I would definitely say if you're a newer couple, don't

01:07:34.040 try to make couples content. Yeah. That's a good boy. I actually love old people's who have

01:07:38.420 been together a long time. Me too. Like I, it looks like yours. That's what I'm saying. It's

01:07:42.160 that's why it's funny. Cause it's like, that's a real couple. Like they've been together for

01:07:46.600 right. Like, you know, like they're not going anywhere. Like sometimes things will happen

01:07:49.660 and people are like, Oh my God, our, my favorite couple is breaking up. I was like, y'all, y'all

01:07:52.840 don't understand. Like me and Ben are locked in for life. And also this is a joke, but like

01:07:57.960 I wasn't making the money I'm making. Now we first got together. So I didn't have Ben signed

01:08:01.920 no prenup. I didn't see my earning potential. So if we break up now, I got to pay his ass

01:08:06.240 personal support. So we definitely locked in for life. Okay. You're not going to catch

01:08:10.680 me out here and divorce in these streets. Cause that means men will be getting a check.

01:08:13.980 So we're in it. But I definitely think like newer couples definitely just, just don't

01:08:20.260 like you've seen those YouTube couples break up where everybody's like making it a thing.

01:08:24.420 Yeah. You're like, let it grow on its own. Let it grow on its own and offline. And also

01:08:28.980 don't be afraid. I'm kind of in a position now where it's like, I'm taking the reins back

01:08:34.440 on my career a little bit, just doing more standup, doing more comedy writing, hosting

01:08:38.400 more shows solo. And people are thinking like there's trouble in paradise. And I'm kind of

01:08:42.400 like, y'all, it was always actually supposed to be this. Like the couple stuff popped up

01:08:47.340 and it was, it was you well before. And then you had like this like little window where

01:08:52.280 it was you and Ben and then you guys were pregnant. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. And it ebbs and flows

01:08:56.140 because it's like, I can't film without him because I can't walk. Like the baby is coming.

01:09:01.220 You know what I'm saying? But I definitely think, uh, I just, I don't know. I know this

01:09:06.600 isn't worth a lot coming from me, but I don't think any couples should have like just a couple's

01:09:12.160 page. Yeah. That's fair. I think you should like, if you think like, obviously people know

01:09:16.060 me and Ben, but it's always been my page. Totally. Like, and I think it would be so wise

01:09:21.360 for each person to have their own identity. If y'all make content together, sure. But for a lot

01:09:26.840 of couples, the only page that exists is the couple's page. And that's hard because one

01:09:32.200 day you want to just post you being silly in the kitchen on your own. And then you're

01:09:35.600 like, well, do I have to run it by my person? Like, well, and then you'll get comments that

01:09:39.580 are like, well, where's so-and-so like, where's your partner? Where are they? Where's the baby?

01:09:42.800 Where's the, yeah. Even me, my page is just me. It is just you. And people know who you're

01:09:47.900 dating. People know who your siblings are. People know who your mom is, but like, and you can

01:09:52.040 know that. Those are like, like, just nice to have. They're all parts of me. My mother

01:09:56.520 is me. My sister is me. Who I'm dating is a part of who I am. But it's like, I'm also

01:10:01.380 my own person. Totally. So I would say, don't make a couple's page. Again, everybody knows

01:10:06.500 me and my partner, but like. But that's not how it started. It was just like a, it was

01:10:10.600 like a beautiful thing that got added onto your platform. And it's funny because those

01:10:14.220 aren't the only videos I've made. Yeah. Those videos do the best. I know. Like, I, you

01:10:18.100 know, let's call it a thing. Those videos do the best. I've seen a few of just

01:10:21.980 you and your baby and they've done really well. See, that's what I'm saying.

01:10:24.600 Like, or just you by yourself. Like, well, I found you before you were just posting

01:10:28.940 stuff with Ben. Yeah. Um, and that's why I'm like, that's why I know that. But

01:10:32.440 that's, that's the, I guess the frustrating part too, is like when people find you at

01:10:35.440 a certain stage, they just think that's all you are. That's all you are. Uh, and

01:10:40.180 even me, like sometimes I'll post like one time last year, I posted like a lip sync

01:10:44.100 of a song and I guess it was like a breakup song. I don't know. I just liked the

01:10:47.700 song and all of the, I literally deleted it cause I was getting annoyed, but all of the

01:10:51.820 comments were like, Oh my God, something happened. Like they broke up, like blah,

01:10:54.560 blah, blah. What? No, I can't. They're like, you're doing lip syncs. It's like, yeah, I'm

01:10:58.500 a human being. Like I'm a TikToker bitch. Like I'm a TikToker. Like I wanted to hop on

01:11:03.040 the trend too. Yeah. Let's make some silly things. Everybody was doing it. Yeah. Like

01:11:07.020 if you switch up from the one kind of content that you do, sometimes people are

01:11:10.160 like, wait, I know you for this thing. You're like, do you only do one thing? No. So I like

01:11:14.740 to do lots of different stuff too. Even when I went to Paris, I posted like, uh, that

01:11:18.820 it was like a, I think it was takeoff and it was like, I can't go out sad about no

01:11:25.040 bitch or whatever. But I was in front of the Eiffel tower. Of course. That's all I

01:11:28.660 was filming. And then people were like, Oh my God, like they broke up and she's

01:11:32.080 probably on vacation in Paris. Who do you think filmed the video? Like who filmed

01:11:36.740 this? I was like, he's behind me haggling some guy for champagne for $5. The guy was

01:11:41.700 like champagne, 30 euros. And he's like, I'll give you five. Yeah. Well dude, knock it

01:11:45.860 off. One time there was like two weeks where wild just wasn't in any videos

01:11:49.300 because I mean, I go back and forth about that too. I'm like, Oh no, I've

01:11:52.460 showed the internet my baby. Yeah. What are the dangers of that? But now it's

01:11:55.380 like, ah, whatever. I'll just deal with, you know, people's kids are on the

01:11:58.920 internet. Like just like how back in the day people's kids would be in

01:12:01.340 magazines or whatever. Yeah. Yeah. But there was a time where she was not in

01:12:04.860 videos for like two weeks. I was just making my own things or me and Ben would

01:12:07.520 make a funny or something else is going on. And people were like, like, was your

01:12:11.320 child taken? Like what happened? I was just like taken. You think I would be

01:12:16.340 like lip syncing in the kitchen if my child was taken? And I'm super cool

01:12:20.240 about it. Like taken by who? Like the government? Yeah. Like what are we talking

01:12:24.700 about? You're like, yeah, actually she was. And it's worked out pretty well. I've

01:12:27.420 got a lot of work done. Yeah. I was like, actually she was a paid actor. She, she

01:12:31.120 actually never was my kid either. Yeah, girl. My contract was up with her. She

01:12:33.540 didn't want to resign. So she bounced. She found another mom. I was like, what are y'all

01:12:38.180 saying? Well, thank you so much for coming on the show. I'm obsessed with

01:12:42.000 you. I'm obsessed with you and your entire family, your beautiful family. I

01:12:44.940 love y'all. You sure you want me to leave? I can stay the rest of the day. You

01:12:48.080 tell Ben, tell Ben right now that you'll move in with me. That's totally fine. You

01:12:51.540 can come back both of our lunches. That would be a perfect match. All of us

01:12:56.440 would be so happy together. Yeah, I'm so happy to have you. Thank you so much for

01:13:00.380 coming on the show. Where can everybody find you? Thank you, everyone. You can find

01:13:04.040 me at Burr I Am. So B-U-R-R underscore I-A-M. It was supposed to be like Will

01:13:08.840 I Am, but only I got the joke. And that's okay. And that's okay. And that's

01:13:13.020 okay. People were like, Burry Em. I'm like, damn, no. So Burr I Am on TikTok, on

01:13:18.440 Instagram, also on YouTube. And I've just been doing some stand up around town. I'm

01:13:23.360 not sure when this comes out, but I definitely in a couple weeks. A couple

01:13:26.560 weeks. Okay. Well, hopefully I'll be in another show by then. And I'm working on a

01:13:30.440 pilot. So I'm excited to finish that. I signed up for a class. So I will be

01:13:35.460 forced to finish it this year. But yeah, but I'll still be making stupid stuff on

01:13:39.320 the internet. Yeah. Well, make sure you'll follow Amber on everything. That way

01:13:42.300 you'll stay up to debate on all of her shows and all of her writing. That's so

01:13:45.740 exciting. Congratulations. Thank you. Thank you. So happy for you. Thank you for

01:13:48.560 coming on the show. Thank you all for joining us on this episode of the comment

01:13:52.140 section. Don't forget new episodes drop every Wednesday. You can stream the audio on

01:13:56.180 all streaming platforms, but the video lives for free and exclusively on our

01:13:59.460 favorite platform, me forgetting the word platform, Spotify. Thank you so much for

01:14:03.880 joining us for this week. Thank you so much to my amazing guest, Amber. Make sure

01:14:06.940 you follow her on everything and I'll see you next week. Bye. Bye y'all.

The Comment Section with Drew Afualo - June 12, 2024

HEAVILY LACTOSE INTOLERANT Ft. Amber Wallin

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