KEEP HATING, IT BOOSTS MY ENGAGEMENT! Ft. Tess Holliday ｜ Drew Afualo ｜ THE COMMENT SECTION EP 68
Summary
Tess Holliday joins me to talk about how she became a man hater, how she got her start on the internet, and what it's like being a single mom to two kids. She also talks about how her mom taught her how to be a stand up comedian and how she turned it all around.
Transcript
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You watched 45 minutes of that just so that you could tell me I was a fat buffalo bitch.
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It makes me look good to Warner Brothers because I got the stats up.
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A hundred percent, a hundred percent, yeah, yeah, I love it.
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A fat buffalo bitch in first class interviewing her idol.
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Hello, everyone, and welcome back to another episode of the comment section show starring me, your favorite, everybody knows me, the men hate me, period.
00:00:35.440
On to the best part of each episode is my very special guest for today, which is the one and only, the iconic, the ledge, Tess Holliday.
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I was going to do an air horn with my mouth and I stopped.
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Well, now I feel, I do it to my kids, but it's maybe, okay, I go, I love that.
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That's literally the best way to introduce you.
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I was just saying earlier, I feel like you're a proud mom.
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I could never replace her, even though I heard we're the same height.
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Tess has known me online forever, like ground floor.
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I've watched you blossom into a man-hating angel that you are.
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Tess, see, some people say that like, they're like, oh, she's just doing this now because
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And I was like, I've been like this on the internet for a long time before I had an audience.
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I also love that you did so many of them from the toilet.
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A fun fact about that is like, I was living with my boyfriend's parents.
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We were living in their house at the time because it was like right before the pandemic too.
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And so like, that was like the only place I could go where like, no, I thought no one
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I guess the walls are not as thick as I thought they were.
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Sometimes I would just sit in my car for hours and film videos.
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And then my boyfriend would be like, he would go in the house and they'd be like, where's
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And he's like, oh, I think she's on the phone or something because he knew I was filming
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I did get a new car, but the Jeep is actually my boyfriend's.
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My career's evolved to a really interesting place now where I think for the first time
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And I think for a long time, it was really hard having so many people shit on me while
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So it's nice that people can shit on me now and I care less.
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Everyone's like, how do you deal with people being mean to you?
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It's really not that hard when, you know, I look at how much I make.
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And it's just funny because people are so stupid.
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Like when people comment under my things and they're so mean, I encourage it.
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Because like you've said it all the time and I've said it for so long.
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It's like, that's why I always say like, if they say that to me and then you go, okay.
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And I also love that people call you a bully because I also have been called a bully for
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But I'm like, babes, first of all, they're being mean to me.
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It turns out they're okay with bullying as long as they're not being bullied.
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And it's funny because whenever men like the create that, what they think is this like
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think piece when they're like, this is what I, I think about her and it's just calling
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I've always said, like, I never said I was against being mean.
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I never said I was not going to make fun of you.
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I've never said that I was nice or like welcoming to an asshole.
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I mean, as somebody that's here, you're not welcoming at all.
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I know they're going to be like, see, that's roof.
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Like the way they just, they chop everything up and they're like, that's.
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It's like, I have said all the time, like, you guys are super cool with being mean.
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You just don't like when you're on the receiving end of it.
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You're probably one of the very few people that really gets what it feels like to have
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It's been, it's, it's been like two prolific people that love to, to hate me as Piers Morgan
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So they just like love to keep my name in their mouth.
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So then recently Piers Morgan wanted to have me on again and interview me.
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And my manager's like, unless it's like six figures, she's not going on.
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But I'm like, you know, $6,000 to have to look at Piers Morgan.
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When, when people are like, why don't you invite people on your show that you disagree
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Cause nothing makes them more mad than just being like, no.
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And also men are so unsafe and so cuckoo that like, I don't, why would I put my life
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So you can come here and their feet can also hang off the chair like yours.
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Cause that's exactly what it's going to be like.
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I've said before, you can be short, but you cannot be short and terrible.
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I think that's like the law of physics, honestly.
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I think that it's like, uh, it's one of those things too, where they are just so comfortable
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And then the one time you are awful back, they're like, why would you do that to me?
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But that's why I appreciated you when I first found you.
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I mean, it was your maniacal laugh, obviously that I fell in love with like everybody else,
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but it was your, your, I mean, your delivery, your sarcasm, it's your sense of humor was
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Cause as if I'm not as funny as you, uh, but I love like roasting people and, and I've
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Cause it's the way that sometimes I can deal with it, but also I just like want people to
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And you just really came along and swept everybody up and you know, you just owned everybody and
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I've been a fan of you for so long that like, you were like probably one of the first, uh,
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people I've ever saw in the modeling industry that like did not look like everybody else.
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And that was like, I think what really like blasted you all over the world because people
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love to talk about people that don't look like them as if they're the only people who
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exist in the world ever, which is the most asinine way of thinking.
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You just like, you just materialize in the air.
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I just ate too many little, little Debbie's passed out in my bed, woke up and I'm, I was
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And I actually, because of me being fat, I made everybody else fat.
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That argument like enrages me to the point where my ass itches.
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Like it's so, when the way that they're like, oh, you're just, you're influencing, promoting
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The same, the same eyes that picked that outfit out and got that bad fade.
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I was invited to be on the doctors one time, the TV show.
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And it was during like, I mean, I was, I was everywhere at this point.
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So people were just like, you know, talking about me more so than ever.
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And, uh, I said no, but they came back and said that they would consider having me on if
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I gave them my blood work, like copies of my blood work.
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But even if it wasn't like, you, what about HIPAA?
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But yeah, I just thought like, yeah, they wanted my blood work before I came on because
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they couldn't believe when I'm like, you know, uh, you're talking about my perceived health
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and you can't tell if someone is quote unquote healthy by looking at them, but also health
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Why would I have to like prove that to come on your show?
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Why aren't we talking about the fact that I was the first person to be on Cosmopolitan
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That makes that, I've actually think I've been on that show.
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Was it the two, it's the old white dude and the other dude?
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You would, you would be great at a, I just had a, I had a light bulb moment.
00:11:12.960
You would be great at having your own like courthouse show.
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As soon as they walk in, I'm going to be like, you're guilty.
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I'm judging based off looks because I'm such a body shamer.
00:11:40.180
Like the coolest, the coolest bitch in the world.
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But I always say too, because they call me a fat bitch all the time.
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You also could be a plus size model because of your height and your thick ass body.
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It's just, you honestly could because you're Gorgina and you're tall and you're thick.
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I think too, like with the way that they perceive women in general, let alone women's health.
00:12:22.960
I just always say, like, I think it's crazy that you like act like you care about health
00:12:28.760
when you don't talk about bodybuilders, like the extreme lengths that they push their bodies
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That's on the like other end of this like health spectrum that you're creating in your
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They literally die all the time from pushing themselves too hard and not eating and all
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And I've seen you do videos about that, which I really appreciate.
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But when Joe Rogan, one of the many times that he mentioned that I was unhealthy or whatever,
00:13:03.720
And I just think like, is this coming from a bald, like a bald man who became, is he
00:13:16.020
Who literally became famous from forcing people to eat roaches and you do hella steroids.
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I would love, I need to make your charcuterie board.
00:13:50.460
No, yeah, but no, I love making a charcuterie board.
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I love the way I will fuck up a charcuterie board.
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I turned my whole kitchen counter into a giant charcuterie board.
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For my, like, Galentine's party I did this year.
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Okay, so we're going to talk about our topic today.
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So our topic is being a successful model and basically representation in the industry as a whole.
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And how beauty standards have been around forever, but they're extremely harmful.
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And how they're, although there is progress, there's still a lot more to be achieved.
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But Tess is obviously someone who is, like, one of the first people to, like, really start pushing for representation in the industry.
00:14:45.260
So, like, how does it feel to, like, be one of the first to, like, be on the cover, to be in the news, to be on carpets, to all that stuff?
00:14:54.360
Yeah, I mean, I, it was a little isolating at first just because there were other people that had done it, but not necessarily that looked like me, right?
00:15:06.800
That weren't, you know, a short little nugget covered in tattoos and also loud.
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I've been, I've been very vocal online for a very long time about injustices that I feel like a lot of people don't talk about.
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I've always had, you know, like a little target on me and it, and I'm very mindful of it.
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So sometimes I would go into these spaces that I very much belonged in, but I would feel like imposter syndrome almost.
00:15:35.780
So it's really nice that we live in the world of Lizzo now where people actually give us our credit and I feel more appreciated now and I feel able to enjoy my career now than I have been.
00:15:52.040
Yeah, like I, yeah, like I, I remember like right after I wrote my book, I was like traveling all over doing all these press and I was so worn out and I felt like no one really gave a shit and nobody cared, but they did.
00:16:07.480
But I, it was just like, I think all of the pressure weighing on me because I didn't want to let people down.
00:16:15.700
I wanted to be like a good, you want to be like good representation and like a solid voice for people that you feel like aren't being heard.
00:16:24.800
And, um, when you are trying to do that and you have like outside voices being critical all the time, it, it gets heavy.
00:16:34.680
It gets, yeah, it's tough, but it's, I, when I look back and think about my work and what I've done and what I continue to do, um, I feel immensely grateful because if I die in three years, like the internet says, I've achieved literally so much.
00:16:51.640
So more than that, which is we'll ever see, absolutely ever in a million years.
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They could, their wildest imagination could never have conceived what you've achieved.
00:17:01.560
So like, and you're still so young, like for as long as you've been in the industry and been successful, you're still so young.
00:17:07.500
I think that's, I get what you mean though about it getting heavy because you almost feel like you're carrying a torch, but at the same time it gets isolating and lonely.
00:17:17.380
Like you said, like being the first or being one of the first, like to really be out there doing it.
00:17:27.080
I've said that before, but I'm like the first, like someone girl to like really build a platform like this.
00:17:33.280
And it's like purely based off pissing off men, which is like, you know, everything in the world.
00:17:38.360
But it's like one of those things where it gets heavy and then I don't know if you, I'm sure you have so many stories, but I have like so many stories too of like people like almost like telling me how much my content has helped them, has like saved them, has inspired them.
00:17:56.440
And that's like, I tell them all the time, like, that's what keeps me going in moments like that when I'm like, God, I'm so tired of like, I, the only thing that I get exhausted of dealing with is like every like three to six months, a new white guy will find me and they'll be like, this is why I think she should be canceled.
00:18:15.040
And then everyone's like, finally, someone's saying it as if like 17 other white dudes haven't done that right before you.
00:18:22.820
And I hate having to hear like, oh, fighting fire with fire and the whole world burns.
00:18:33.560
Well, it's kind of funny because white men have literally been burning down the world since the beginning of time.
00:18:43.920
So it feels like you should kind of be mad at yourself, babes.
00:18:50.880
And the like after, like, like you said, you've, you've like clapped back at people too.
00:18:55.440
And like afterwards, the way they like immediately bitch out and they're like, why would you do this to me?
00:19:09.020
I think it's because they really think that it's just going to go differently for them.
00:19:13.220
But, um, you did a video recently that I, I don't know.
00:19:17.700
It had me crying, but you said something like, well, I wasn't going to do it, but you asked
00:19:21.820
Like you, yeah, I'm here because yeah, you did it to yourself.
00:19:29.200
Um, but, but I, this is literally why, like I do what I do, like you said, for other people, for people that never really felt like they had a voice or felt like they couldn't exist in the world the way that they do.
00:19:43.200
And I would do it all over again and keep doing it.
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If I knew that I was going to be able to have a fraction of the impact that I've been able to have.
00:19:53.980
So, you know, it's, it's worth it, but it's tough.
00:20:06.700
It's like, some people ask me, do people ask you, how do you, how do you deal with hate?
00:20:10.260
I thought when you said built different, I thought you, it was a short joke.
00:20:22.260
Because they struggle with dealing with hate online.
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And I, I think people probably, I'm very sensitive.
00:20:32.760
And it's probably because I'm like, yes, I'm cancer.
00:20:35.240
I'm very, I do care and I probably will always care.
00:20:45.640
Um, because I'm like, you clearly weren't hugged enough as a child and that's not my fault.
00:20:50.900
Um, but people don't realize that there's so many issues in society that are because of toxic masculinity
00:20:56.900
and because of, of men's fragile ego and how we have trained them to behave and act in
00:21:07.260
So therefore you set up a dynamic and a culture where nobody gives a shit about each other.
00:21:18.500
So like I do, I, I do care, but only there's a big asterisk next to it.
00:21:33.560
Um, which I, it's in my big three, but I'm a Virgo.
00:21:41.920
And I, I eventually get shit done, but like it takes a while, but that's why when I see
00:21:47.060
maybe like more, when you post things, I'll like, I know that I'm that person that's like
00:21:52.200
sending you like the, I send you like the sappiest like messages or like little voice
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notes, just like cheering you on or reminding you, or when you were saying people do the deep
00:22:02.080
dives into your personal life that there's like a whole Reddit threads dedicated to why
00:22:13.760
I just feel like, um, it's a waste of time because I'm going to be horrible for a long
00:22:19.120
I, no matter what I say, like I, I've done videos like more recently where I'm like, you
00:22:24.840
know, some people have attacked me unprovoked and then I'm like, all right, I'm going to
00:22:28.640
talk to you real plain and simple, no jokes, no insults, no nothing.
00:22:36.420
They don't, it doesn't work when they're like, why don't you try this?
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Like my, that's why I've always said my goal is not to change you.
00:22:48.960
It's to literally make you want to delete your tech dog.
00:22:56.460
And I also love how they're always like, oh, I bet you don't have a boyfriend or I bet
00:23:02.180
he's ugly or I bet he's ashamed and you're wrong on all those.
00:23:06.460
And I've said too, I, I said recently actually when I showed him and sometimes I've said, I've
00:23:11.220
said this on the show before I think, but like when I make videos about him, that's a dunk
00:23:18.220
Nobody clocks views like a hot ass dude who loves a bitch like me.
00:23:23.140
So when I make those, that's because it clocks the views.
00:23:36.300
But I always know there's like, you'll do a video like every couple months with Billy and
00:23:42.080
And then 20 million views later or whatever, you know?
00:23:45.140
He always tells me, he's like, did you make a video about me?
00:23:49.000
And he goes, uh, cause I just got like 5,000 followers on Instagram.
00:23:59.180
Why would you want to follow the person you love as boyfriend?
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I don't even follow him cause I think it's weird.
00:24:11.320
I think it's like, I think it also too, it's a lot of dudes who like go and be like, hey
00:24:19.080
When does it ever bother him when people like are mean to you?
00:24:29.620
Um, he did hate it for a long time, but, um, you know, for obvious reasons, cause he loves
00:24:35.940
Unlike most of you, you don't have someone who loves you.
00:24:41.500
I think now he's just kind of like, he just gets annoyed kind of like me.
00:24:49.980
And then sometimes he'll send me videos that he finds and he's like, you should do this
00:24:55.280
And he tells me to be mean to you all the time.
00:24:58.840
Cause they're like, you probably don't have a dad.
00:25:00.920
I was like, my dad's the best guy in the world.
00:25:03.780
I was going to say, that's exactly why you're like this.
00:25:05.980
Cause you all are hot, wet garbage next to my dad and my boyfriend.
00:25:11.420
And that's, my dad wasn't the best until recently.
00:25:23.800
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So for those of you who don't know, here on the comment section, we bring videos that are applicable to our topic today.
00:25:55.020
And we break them down, kiki, laugh about them, all the fun stuff.
00:25:58.360
So this first video, we just do little summaries, is this guy's video explains the situation where media personality Jordan Peterson tweeted this response to a plus size model on the cover of Sports Illustrated magazine.
00:26:24.960
And no amount of authoritarian tolerance is going to change that.
00:26:29.540
First of all, Jordan Peterson is one of like, if it was like him, Pierce Morgan and Joe Rogan.
00:26:38.560
But also, like, do you, are you just using a bunch of words that sound big together?
00:26:53.220
My Twitter thread, my Twitter header is literally a Reddit thread.
00:26:57.080
And the title of it was, that stupid bitch on TikTok named giraffe wallow.
00:27:00.940
I literally cropped it and I was like, Twitter header.
00:27:11.280
But yeah, they just love putting a bunch of things together that don't make sense.
00:27:15.980
But also, she's on the cover of Sports Illustrated.
00:27:23.920
Yeah, that's why they're like, this is an illness that's spreading, like promoting obesity or whatever.
00:27:29.020
And then I'm like, you're at home talking about her.
00:27:32.320
And she's like traveling the world and like making a lot of money and like being beautiful.
00:27:41.240
But also, are you just mad because you want to f*** her?
00:27:44.120
Like I told Piers Morgan one time, like, it's really giving.
00:28:01.340
That's a big thing, especially when it comes to how they attack any women that's outside of the gender binary.
00:28:10.940
Any woman that does not look like a cisgender, white, thin woman.
00:28:14.400
They're like, they almost like hate themselves because they feel a little some-some.
00:28:20.020
Some of them may genuinely just hate fat people, but you have to unpack why.
00:28:24.000
Because a lot of times I think, too, especially like gym bro culture.
00:28:29.880
When I'm on dating apps, which is never because they're trash, that's who I match with.
00:28:47.900
I revisit them just to make sure they don't get too comfortable.
00:28:51.720
I'll come back every few weeks, and I kick that hornet's nest, and I say, I'll be back.
00:28:59.060
I love it when you are like, how much are you lifting?
00:29:06.260
Or their quads, when you make fun of their quads.
00:29:08.160
Yeah, Johnny Sibley told me a lot of them don't do legs because, well, one, they think it's gay because they're, like, homophobic, obviously.
00:29:14.760
But then, also, he said it's because if their quads get too big, it will make their dick look smaller, which I had never thought about.
00:29:26.940
I was like, when he said that, I was like, oh, my God, I've never thought about that.
00:29:31.020
And I still don't feel, I still actually feel the same about them, which is hate them.
00:29:37.200
Well, they are a perfect example of hating yourself so much you project it onto others.
00:29:41.880
Because they are, they hate the idea of them looking a certain way because of what society has conditioned them to believe.
00:29:48.420
So when they see someone who is existing and is happy and is loved and is successful, that looks like what they've been taught to hate.
00:29:55.900
They're like, how come this bitch gets to be happy and I don't?
00:29:58.640
Well, and to them, it looks like it's people being lazy or people giving up or not putting effort or work in or whatever.
00:30:07.940
Because like you said, they, it really comes down to them hating themselves so much.
00:30:12.920
We're not like solving any of big life's questions.
00:30:18.560
And instead of, I don't know, maybe going to therapy, it's just a lot easier.
00:30:25.280
The way that they say that, like you said, they hate themselves so much.
00:30:29.860
And it's like, it's just the most aggressive form of a projection.
00:30:33.520
But then at the same time, they're like, it's like almost like an envy.
00:30:38.520
Like they're like envious because someone is, loves themselves enough and is confident enough in themselves to be who they really are.
00:30:45.980
Whether that's like just existing normally or like going out and finding love or finding success or whatever.
00:30:53.500
Like they just can't, their tiny little walnut brains can't even begin to like wrap their brain on.
00:30:59.920
Like if it doesn't have to do with macros or like bland chicken, like they're not going to process.
00:31:04.560
And I'm like, you're literally doing all of this to your body for what?
00:31:08.760
You're miserable because you're probably hungry.
00:31:16.440
When you have less than 10% body fat, it doesn't do shit, does it?
00:31:21.040
In fact, one of the videos I made once, which was arguably one of my most popular videos of all time when I was defending you.
00:31:32.740
At the time that I did it, that was my most popular video I've ever made.
00:31:44.960
It was also great, too, because I think it really, because people love to say that you body shame.
00:31:50.580
And I think it really showed people that, you know, well, I was going to say something nice, but it left my brain.
00:31:57.140
But people, my brain's like, you're being too nice.
00:32:00.880
People, like, saw you basically talking about somebody that's fat as shit like me, and they appreciated it.
00:32:08.980
You know, a lot of people sent me the video, like, did you see this?
00:32:16.800
Well, and I actually talked to my sister about that at the time, too, because my sister was telling me, I think it's more powerful when you talk about it because of how I look.
00:32:28.000
So I'm obviously not a really, really thin person, but I'm a thicker girl, too.
00:32:31.800
But it's like, I'm talking about this, and I'm someone who is also with someone who loves me and cares for me.
00:32:38.640
And it, like, it holds more weight, unfortunately, like, because I have a boyfriend, and he's handsome and good-looking and in shape.
00:32:47.860
Like, it's even more, like, it's, like, more bulletproof.
00:32:50.560
Like, they can't really argue, like, oh, it's because she's single.
00:32:53.180
Oh, it's because she's, like, a stupid, ugly, fat bitch.
00:32:55.780
Or you're unhappy, or you didn't have a dad that loved you, or whatever.
00:33:05.560
Okay, so let's get back to this stupid Jordan Peterson video.
00:33:08.740
I actually don't know who Jordan Peterson is, by the way.
00:33:12.940
He's literally, like, Pierce Morgan in a different font.
00:33:16.980
But he talks like Kermit the Frog, and I feel like we don't talk about that enough.
00:33:23.160
Like, literally, like, he's on the verge of tears.
00:33:24.920
That's what he sounds like all the time, which he probably is.
00:33:30.340
I made a video about him once when he was like, he says the most headass shit, but he
00:33:35.180
says, like, men built the walls and the trees and the, you know, the shit they say when
00:33:40.120
they're like, men literally built the internet and the phones you're talking on.
00:33:43.520
And that's like, you're mean about men and they built everything you have, which is obviously
00:33:48.180
not true, but when I stitched one of those videos once, I was like, you know, they put
00:33:53.720
the, like, sad music on it, and then they're like, we don't talk about this enough.
00:34:02.120
But also, like, it's not, when I, when people say that, like, we, that we hate men, like,
00:34:08.680
there's men in this room that clearly don't suck.
00:34:11.780
Like, people are capable of being men and not being pieces of shit.
00:34:17.680
That's why I said it's not a, it's not necessarily a man thing, but like, I mean, let's look at
00:34:25.960
I mean, like, I guess like being terrible is not exclusive to men, but like.
00:34:34.760
Uh, but anyways, uh, yeah, I made a video about that once and then there's all these
00:34:41.200
head ass dudes being like, oh, women don't want to talk about the irony about men saying
00:34:45.980
like, oh, you, you, you saying that men are short is making fun of insecurities.
00:34:56.920
First of all, but like you want to reinforce beauty standards on women, but you don't like
00:35:05.080
But then when I talk about that, I always say like, you guys need to stop pretending
00:35:08.620
like you actually give a shit about men's problems, like toxic masculinity, because if
00:35:14.120
you actually gave a shit, you would take the necessary steps to unpack it and like confront
00:35:22.000
But you only want to care when I'm being mean to you.
00:35:25.880
When I'm being mean to an asshole, you want to talk about what about men's feelings?
00:35:36.780
Like clearly he doesn't give a shit about feelings because he attacks somebody else.
00:35:44.740
But this next, this, uh, we read the comments on the videos.
00:35:48.600
So this one says beauty is subjective, but there's obviously a line.
00:35:53.320
The point is, is society is pushing for normalizing unhealthy standards.
00:35:57.840
Oh, the way I've seen that comment in many different fonts.
00:36:02.500
Beauty is subject, beauty is subjective, but obviously it's not.
00:36:09.460
Like when people like criticize me or talk shit about me, but I'm a model.
00:36:19.580
I was like that line where she's like face card never declines.
00:36:22.780
Anyway, I love Beyonce, but I just don't, I don't, I don't get it.
00:36:27.560
Like when people call me ugly or fat or the arguments here, like you're normalizing something
00:36:37.100
Like, it's not like I like bought my way into being a model.
00:36:47.020
And I always say, I'm always like, well, I would think I would say shit like this too
00:36:52.420
If I was ugly like you, like I'd probably, yeah, I'd probably be mad at the world too.
00:36:55.900
And people used to get mad at me when I would say that people that were just being mean like
00:36:59.460
that were jealous because they were like, well, that's not a valid argument.
00:37:04.840
Because I can't imagine hating on somebody else that is happy and living their dream.
00:37:18.020
Like when they're like, well, you don't care about their feelings.
00:37:29.560
When men say terrible racist shit to me, I don't care about your feelings.
00:37:36.780
I don't like if you drop dead tomorrow, I wouldn't care.
00:37:46.060
Like I'm like everything about you is worthless to me.
00:37:50.200
And like that's how I see terrible shithead dudes like that.
00:37:56.520
And it's also terrifying that these people are raising children.
00:38:01.920
So many of these people are parents and you have daughters.
00:38:08.920
Like hopefully no one ever talks to your daughter that way.
00:38:13.140
I wonder if somebody like if your daughter was on the cover of Sports Illustrated living
00:38:17.460
her dreams and somebody called her a fat bitch.
00:38:20.980
He'd probably get on Twitter and be like, well, that's what happens when you promote unhealthy
00:38:27.300
And then this one says Sports Illustrated is a journal that promotes sports bodies in
00:38:38.960
Do you know the Sports Illustrated swimsuit issue?
00:38:41.780
How many of those women are like professional athletes?
00:38:51.840
Oh, this last one says beauty is not subjective.
00:38:56.800
But the attack on beauty has been a sign of degradation for our society.
00:39:03.080
See, but again, it's just like the big words that make no sense.
00:39:05.900
And I bet they're doing like they're they're like Googling big words as they're they're
00:39:15.580
No, literally the beauty is when people say beauty is not subjective.
00:39:26.580
And a lot of people don't want to talk about how beauty standards are so closely tied to
00:39:31.840
Like a lot of y'all don't want to have that conversation because you're either one not
00:39:41.700
So when they say that they're literally talking about blonde haired, blue eyed, thin
00:39:58.920
I think it's just like just say like you're talking about like minority women in any capacity.
00:40:10.080
I just they're either ugly or they want to fetishize them or.
00:40:13.840
It's like no in between or appropriate their culture.
00:40:21.900
There's like when I was in the dating pool, it that became very clear to me specifically
00:40:26.680
with white men like they want to they want the story.
00:40:30.860
They don't want to like actually like get to know who you are and like get to know you
00:40:36.700
They want to just be able to tell people that they hooked up with you, which is gross.
00:40:41.440
Obviously, I don't know that from a race standpoint because I'm very Caucasian, but I know what it's
00:40:50.020
People treat me like it actually just happened recently where I was really into this person
00:40:58.820
And then I'm this is TMI, but we're already doing it.
00:41:02.820
I was celibate for two years and recently and it was a choice.
00:41:07.560
I was like doing kind of like a spiritual reset.
00:41:12.020
But after we hooked up, this person said to me, I can't believe that I just test holiday.
00:41:20.600
And I felt like the floor just opened and I like I like wanted it.
00:41:34.520
And yeah, I just think that people could do better.
00:41:38.960
And then, yeah, it makes it a lot easier to not get the fetish thing is so creepy.
00:41:53.200
Like weirdo, like you're like, you know, like sketchy, you scare me way.
00:42:05.940
I was like, I actually thought that they were kidding.
00:42:19.660
There are like so many men who are like, this is why like I literally recently.
00:42:25.520
Oh, man, I kicked a completely different hornet's nest recently on TikTok because I was talking
00:42:30.500
about how much I really, really hate when men say this bullshit about like taking women
00:42:36.500
out of their masculine era and putting them in their feminine era.
00:42:41.180
I talked about it now because I've been seeing lots of stuff.
00:42:43.300
But that's the video you're talking about where I wasn't going to do it because it was
00:42:49.660
But then he someone tagged me and was like, this is so embarrassing for him.
00:42:58.340
And that's when I was like, oh, and you did it to yourself.
00:43:01.020
And then as soon as my video went live, he deleted his.
00:43:05.060
Immediately and then pretended he never made that video in the first place.
00:43:08.040
So if it was good intentioned, why did that happen?
00:43:12.880
But with that with that type of like argument, I've talked about, first of all, how like the
00:43:21.320
But I was like, you guys need to unpack the fact that gender is a construct.
00:43:27.040
Like it's literally something that was made up just like BMI.
00:43:37.360
It's like there's so it's so all of this is so deeply embedded in our society.
00:43:42.520
And the reason the diet culture is a multi-billion dollar industry and all of this stuff exists
00:43:47.680
is because people just want to profit off of you hating yourself.
00:43:52.300
You know, they just want it and they just want to make money.
00:43:56.780
And I and I talked about that because I was like every time they talk about masculine
00:44:00.580
era versus a feminine era, they always associate masculinity with like being independent, being
00:44:06.680
alone, being single, taking care of yourself, financially providing yourself.
00:44:10.780
When you're feminine, you're letting men take care of you.
00:44:14.680
And I was like, what's the difference between saying that and saying, like, I just think
00:44:18.440
women should stay at home because it's my job to take care of them as the man.
00:44:25.340
How many videos do we see, especially on TikTok?
00:44:29.200
I'm segwaying, but it infuriated me that there was an older man that was like, I can't
00:44:33.860
he was making like jalapeno poppers, like bacon wrapped jalapeno poppers.
00:44:37.580
And he was like, you know, she was sitting on the couch all day and she was supposed to
00:44:43.680
Turns out his wife didn't have it made because she had just gotten back from a chemo treatment.
00:44:52.800
So you're mad that your jalapeno stuffed, bacon wrapped goddamn poppers weren't ready because
00:45:02.340
She's like, sorry, I'm so exhausted from chemotherapy.
00:45:06.680
So you mean to tell me you want me to sit around and let you take care of me?
00:45:15.940
First you go to chemo, you're gone all day and you come back and you're too lazy to make
00:45:32.220
That video that you just described to me is heinous in its very nature.
00:45:42.680
Well, they're also like when they say this, like, oh, I literally had talked about this
00:45:47.800
because some women were really upset when I talked about masculine feminine energy.
00:45:51.600
They're like, you don't think it's you think it's bad to want men to take care of women?
00:46:02.080
Like, what I said was it's harmful and dangerous and also invalidating to people who don't adhere
00:46:12.280
It's bad to associate masculinity with taking care of yourself and then femininity with being
00:46:17.880
weaker that you need someone to take care of you.
00:46:20.700
So if you want a man to spoil you, they should do it because they want to, not because you're
00:46:28.540
I got in a fight with this guy one time who was on TikTok.
00:46:31.440
He's very popular on TikTok, but he's a f***ing turd.
00:46:43.260
And he's a musician, but his whole claim to fame was that he went viral years ago for
00:46:49.660
saying like that he's attracted to his wife, even though she's plus size.
00:46:54.080
And like, she might never be on the cover of Victoria's or Victoria's Secret.
00:46:57.540
She might not ever be a Victoria's Secret model or on the cover of Sports Illustrated.
00:47:01.040
But like, I'm still attracted to her regardless.
00:47:03.740
And so I said, yeah, and I said something like, what?
00:47:08.320
Also, why are we praising men for doing the brand minimum?
00:47:10.500
Because then a ton of women were like, oh, my God, what a king.
00:47:14.640
And so his whole thing became like, Robbie Tripp is his name.
00:47:21.280
But his whole thing just became like, you know, like he's the fat woman warrior.
00:47:27.580
Second of all, why should you get a reward for like caring about your wife?
00:47:32.260
But like where I'm going with this is people, it's their own shit that like you're putting
00:47:38.200
out in the world thinking that you're doing something great.
00:47:44.400
But really, you're just doing what you should be doing.
00:47:50.680
And taking care of her because you want to, not because you have to.
00:47:56.440
I'm doing it in spite of how much I don't want to.
00:48:01.240
Like, so what if someone was like, I don't care what other people say.
00:48:07.860
I literally was like, if someone described you as that, like, like, be for real.
00:48:17.580
So when, when like a woman talks to another, her group of friends, that's somebody who they're
00:48:29.000
Like, they're, they're scared to show their friends a picture because you're ugly.
00:48:33.860
Like, you're, like, I love you in spite of being overweight.
00:48:44.840
But I hate videos like that because they'll be like, oh, you should talk about this guy.
00:48:57.800
If you were one of the good ones, why do you have to tell us?
00:49:01.360
And also the, why is that whole your, that, why is that your entire identity?
00:49:18.060
And then you see all the comments are like, like what you said.
00:49:29.000
When you have like an outright bigot, like an outright misogynist and someone who's just
00:49:38.260
Someone like that is far more harmful to me and dangerous because they can
00:49:43.000
Like, they can lie and they can manipulate you.
00:49:46.020
Whereas like someone who's just outright terrible, you're like, this guy's terrible,
00:49:50.440
But someone who's like, well, no, like, I just think like you, I just want to take
00:49:57.880
Like, you're always working and I feel like you don't love me enough.
00:50:01.100
Like, it's shit like that that makes my ass itch.
00:50:06.680
Well, like you say, the call's coming from inside the house.
00:50:08.820
Yeah, it infuriates me because they trick women.
00:50:13.960
And I said that in my video about the masculine feminine energy bullshit.
00:50:17.860
I was like, this is literally just a manipulation tactic to like clip your wings because they
00:50:23.520
don't want you to be too independent because they need you to need them.
00:50:27.120
But then as soon as you start needing them a little too much, they're not going to want
00:50:31.700
And so I made a follow up because some women were like, what do you think it's bad to
00:50:40.980
You dragging other women for male validation will wear out quickly.
00:50:46.500
Also, the men aren't going to be there when you need them.
00:50:52.460
Like, they're going to look, walk right all over you just like they're trying to walk
00:50:56.320
So I literally said in my video, I'm like, okay, if men are so confident about that, like
00:51:04.060
To like keep women from earning their own money or like being too independent so they
00:51:10.940
I was like, if that's the case, ask them how they feel about women who primarily date for
00:51:18.860
Let's see if they're as supportive as they're claiming they are.
00:51:23.640
I was like, ask them, ask them what they think.
00:51:26.320
I've literally said, I have defended women who have talked about dating older men primarily
00:51:31.480
for money because I think it's your bag, bitch.
00:51:33.620
Like if you both know what you're getting out of it, who cares?
00:51:36.860
But the reason why they don't like, if you ask them, they're not going to like that.
00:51:44.960
A lot of things they don't like about women's independence is purely because it's consensual.
00:51:58.980
People just, I mean, men would do it too if they could.
00:52:05.820
One time I talked about this dude who like, I think I like sent him into a spiral or something.
00:52:10.400
He like had to do a spiritual awakening after me.
00:52:15.920
He ran into the woods never to be seen again and then came out and then made 20 videos about me.
00:52:20.300
But he made this like dissertation, like attacking these two girls.
00:52:26.280
And I literally was like, because his whole thing was like, you only have followers because
00:52:33.600
And I was like, who do you think consumes that kind of content?
00:52:39.620
I call again, call coming inside the house, but also who says you can't shake ass, shake
00:52:44.980
ass, get followers, see if it works, put them on.
00:52:47.300
Maybe, maybe you're upset because your content is shit.
00:52:52.200
When I realized that people hated me because I was fat and in my underwear and lingerie and
00:52:59.840
it got the kind of attention that it did because you weren't really seeing plus size people
00:53:05.080
exist on the internet in that way around that time.
00:53:08.700
I mean, they did like Tumblr existed and I was not the first person to be hot and fat
00:53:13.940
in my underwear on the internet, but just with the amount of followers that I did, I just
00:53:20.340
And then people were like, oh, you're a mom, you're this, you can't be.
00:53:36.180
I made that joke when I interviewed the rock cause that was like such a full circle moment
00:53:42.740
And when I got to interview him, my sister was watching the live cause I was on DC, like DC
00:53:49.920
They did the live and that's where all the interviews were broadcast and like all the
00:53:53.500
comments were real, like 50, 50, like they were so supportive or they were downright awful
00:53:58.940
And I was like, when she was telling me, yeah, some of them were terrible and, but a lot
00:54:04.460
And then when she was telling me, I'm like, I mean, they had to watch me.
00:54:07.320
They watched, they watched 45 minutes of that shit.
00:54:10.880
You were like, I'm going to be everywhere, bitch.
00:54:15.400
I probably, listen, I will tell a joke, but I will never tell a lie.
00:54:19.280
And I said, I said, I was going to like poison ivy.
00:54:24.660
I was going to bleed into every, so they never stopped scratching.
00:54:29.880
You watched 45 minutes of that just so that you could tell me I was a fat Buffalo bitch.
00:54:38.440
It makes me look good to Warner brothers because I got the stats up a hundred percent.
00:54:45.020
When is a win a fat Buffalo bitch in first class interviewing her.
00:54:56.080
I literally have other things y'all will tell you offline.
00:54:58.800
That I'm doing that I literally can't wait for the men to see it.
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Okay, this last video is, it's a woman's video, is in response to a guy's comment that said,
00:56:11.700
two bad women created the beauty standard for themselves.
00:56:15.080
She says, here is who owns the beauty industry that created this standard.
00:56:19.660
And it posts pictures of CEOs and owners of the top beauty companies in the world.
00:56:23.940
The vast majority are all owned by old white men.
00:56:27.560
Well, why do you think that they're doing that?
00:56:33.620
They're not doing it for themselves because they're doing it for men because that's how
00:56:39.560
women have been conditioned that everything that we do is for the male gaze.
00:56:45.780
Which newsflash, I don't ever want a man to look at me ever.
00:56:54.300
I told her, I had talked to her about it on my episode with her, but we talked about
00:56:58.740
how like there are, like her and I are a great example.
00:57:03.680
Someone who's so truly removed from the male gaze.
00:57:07.200
Like a man could never look at me again and it would be too soon.
00:57:11.240
Like he could never talk to me again and I would literally be like, oh my God.
00:57:20.320
Like my validity, my worth does not come from their approval.
00:57:28.440
And I talked about this the other day with my boyfriend actually, but, uh, when men like
00:57:33.220
attack women who look a certain way, whether they're fat, they have a bunch of piercings,
00:57:37.320
tattoos, uh, they have blue hair, you know, they always say blue hair, whatever the shit
00:57:43.560
Um, let's like, it takes a piercings, for example, like if someone had piercings all
00:57:47.000
over their face and they were presenting, like they identify as a woman, they'll attack
00:57:50.300
someone like that because someone like that is so removed from the male gaze.
00:57:53.960
They did not do that because it's appealing to men at all.
00:57:56.680
And even though they, they aren't attracted to that, they're still offended that you don't
00:58:12.000
I still want to be able to like say I would never.
00:58:15.120
And they, they can't like their way, their brains just like, Oh my God.
00:58:21.380
Or like, they're like, I, yeah, I wouldn't f*** you.
00:58:26.100
Like whoever said, that's, that's one of my favorite things just over the course of
00:58:30.640
Like I wouldn't even f*** you or you're disgusting.
00:58:38.340
I'm so, I'm so grateful every single day that I'm gay.
00:58:43.040
And I mean, unfortunately I am still attracted to men, but I think I did a video about that
00:58:47.560
recently where I am feeling, I'm just not as attracted to men anymore because I don't
00:58:54.220
And so I think I'm just going to completely not date cis het men anymore.
00:59:01.760
You know, and it's just, it's just wild that people think that we just sit around thinking
00:59:12.120
I hope he knows, I hope he notices, like when they write like, you're a fat, ugly bitch
00:59:23.040
Like, you think I'm like, oh my God, guys cancel everything.
00:59:28.880
That blows my mind is that people think you're fat.
00:59:40.960
What you're trying to say is you're tall and thick as shit.
00:59:44.140
Well, and what's crazy is that I, before you, I ever posted anything that had my body in
00:59:51.640
So I, I would tell like my followers who love me, they're like, how do I like free myself
00:59:58.020
Like feeling terrible when they say things like that to me cause I want to make content,
01:00:01.120
but I'm afraid and I'm nervous and I'm worried that I'll get hate and it will like ruin me.
01:00:06.440
And I was telling them that I literally get, I got hate on videos of just my body, not my
01:00:14.260
Literally from here up, they would call me a fat bitch.
01:00:26.040
If you were talking like me, they would still call you fat and ugly.
01:00:31.160
So you can take the power out of it right away.
01:00:34.360
Like steal the wind right out themselves, bitch.
01:00:36.260
Like it's not going to hurt you when you know that one fat's not an insult.
01:00:39.840
You have to unpack your internalized fat phobia first.
01:00:42.740
And I was like, and then second, you have to know they're going to say that shit to you no
01:00:47.600
I mean, there'll be the amount of people that are nice to me and I'm hot and then all of
01:00:57.980
They say the most like, they say the most crazy shit.
01:01:17.680
But oh, oh, also this video saying like women created the beauty standard for themselves.
01:01:27.540
I would say most of the time it's not on purpose.
01:01:33.360
And I also think like if women like want to do all of the things we do, myself included,
01:01:40.820
If I want to go get my hair and nails and done whatever, I'm doing that because I want
01:01:46.100
I'm not doing that because I'm told that I want to.
01:01:49.020
Like if the world disappeared tomorrow and I would have to like live in a cave and like
01:01:53.640
exist like they used to, I'm going to like, I would do it, but I'm going to be f***ing
01:01:57.840
mad that I don't have like nails and lashes and shit like that.
01:02:01.760
And I'm not trying to look good for anybody else, but like f***, like I just, yeah.
01:02:07.880
Because I get the shit about my nails too sometimes.
01:02:10.120
I'm like, if you're not a bad bitch, just say that.
01:02:33.380
The way they just like, my sister says this all the time, but she goes, you can't just
01:02:40.420
Like, it's so applicable to everything in life.
01:02:49.400
Like mulling around, like kicking around in there.
01:02:56.640
That's why I said, they're not going to hear anything I say.
01:03:02.100
Every time I say like elephant in the room, you're the real elephant.
01:03:12.340
So this, uh, last comment says what beauty standards and makeup companies, no man ever
01:03:20.900
It's like, you're, you're like there, but you're not there.
01:03:27.020
Like girls want it because men have convinced them they need it.
01:03:35.440
Like, I feel like makeup and beauty, anything beauty related or like I genuinely, it's just
01:03:43.760
It's evolved so far past like men being like, get this rouge to get a husband.
01:03:49.140
Like it's, it's, we're not in the 1950s anymore.
01:03:51.140
Like we're so far past that at this point, it's an art form.
01:03:54.760
So it's like it, it, they're doing it because they look good.
01:03:58.840
And I always think you don't want them to look good.
01:04:01.720
With or without, but you don't want the extra spice.
01:04:05.360
It's like how they shit on people like Harry Styles, um, for, I mean, I know people,
01:04:10.100
whatever I'm, I was going to get into the people.
01:04:13.200
I'm not going to rewind, but people who like shit on him for like painting his nails or
01:04:18.600
doing whatever and they call him gay or the way that he dresses, but it's, but how are
01:04:24.540
Cause you know, that's the, it, I once made a video, like one of my first videos to ever
01:04:33.460
Um, I was like, I'm not even going to get into the nuance of the male and female gays
01:04:37.580
because like these lunk heads are not smart enough to have that conversation with me.
01:04:41.780
But someone had commented on my video and they said a good, um, like example of the male
01:04:49.500
The superhero is the male gaze where Loki is the female gaze.
01:04:53.420
So it's like brawn and strength and bravery and courage is like what's considered manly
01:05:00.580
and then to women, what's considered attractive to them is being smart, being funny, being
01:05:07.840
And not that Loki's ugly, but I'm just saying like their strengths that are highlighted are
01:05:13.780
Thor is like topless arms out muscles all the time.
01:05:16.560
Loki's fully covered head to toe, like all the time, neck to ankle.
01:05:30.600
And the same dudes are always like, they say that they want a dad bod because it makes them
01:05:37.940
I was literally thinking like, are women like attracted, like beauty is subjective, obviously.
01:05:42.940
So some women genuinely aren't attracted to men who are like super in shape and that's
01:05:47.100
But some women, they could find you attractive.
01:05:50.080
But then you open your mouth and then they're like, it ruins it.
01:05:54.580
Like you open your fat gob and they're like, oh my God, get out of here.
01:05:59.540
And I was like, that's, you ruin it for yourself.
01:06:01.780
So now women will go after men who don't look like they're like chiseled or whatever it
01:06:07.440
Because nine times out of 10, they had to develop a personality on like, yeah, yeah.
01:06:11.640
Their personality revolves around having like big, like Hercules titties.
01:06:15.460
It's not easy being buff, but you know, somebody's got to do it.
01:06:23.360
I made that video about pap smears and the men lost their mind, man.
01:06:28.780
And then they're like, you think you're stronger than me?
01:06:32.560
But that's my, you know, one of my favorite things that people say about me in particular
01:06:37.720
is they're like, oh, you're lazy, blah, blah, blah.
01:06:41.180
And I'm like, you couldn't do what I do in a day.
01:06:57.040
And also this like a lazy mindset thing is such a gross capitalist mindset.
01:07:03.200
Like you have to, you have to be on, you have to be, you have to be working, you have
01:07:11.500
Like we're not, we're not like in this, like go, go, go.
01:07:15.600
Like literally jumping out of a green army plane.
01:07:20.240
When really it's getting in there like Hyundai and driving to Sam's Club and working.
01:07:29.120
And it's like, it's like that dingy gold color.
01:07:31.900
And then they go sell cell phones in a Sam's Club and they're like, me, that's me on my
01:07:39.920
That's why I'm like, okay, well, nothing you say is ever going to make them happy.
01:07:52.300
So to wrap up this episode, what do you want people to know about?
01:07:56.800
Just existing on the internet in general, as someone who does not adhere to like those
01:08:08.320
Like, what do you want people to know or believe or hold close to them?
01:08:10.740
I mean, I think that us fat bitches are proof that you can literally be who you want to
01:08:18.520
be and be happy and have a successful full life, despite what people think or say.
01:08:25.620
I mean, we've had so many examples over and over.
01:08:30.140
And I think that TikTok has been such a blessing for me, as gay as it sounds, because I've met
01:08:35.300
like so many people like you and Dylan and so many people that literally are just existing
01:08:41.120
and being themselves and taking up the space that was taken from them for so long that they,
01:08:46.860
that now we have like people that are making all of us just feel happy and seen in a way
01:08:56.960
So anybody who doesn't like you or, or thinks otherwise, because they don't matter.
01:09:07.080
They're not going to keep you from a happy life or like love or success, anything that
01:09:16.260
And the amount of times that I was living my life to make other people happy and you're
01:09:27.120
So prioritize yourself and your happiness and what that looks like to you.
01:09:31.640
And if people actually with you, then they're going to with you.
01:09:34.520
And then you'll be a super hot, successful, rich, bad bitch like Tess Holliday.
01:09:55.620
For those of you who do not already follow Tess Holliday, please go and follow her.
01:10:04.900
On everything and everywhere, go follow Tess immediately.
01:10:10.820
Do you have anything exciting coming up that you want to talk about?
01:10:21.860
People will be seeing a lot of me as per usual.
01:10:24.140
Well, go follow Tess and then you'll be updated like me.
01:10:27.800
Thank you, everyone, for joining us on this episode of The Comment Section Show.