STARVING PICKUP ARTIST Ft. Kurtis Conner | The Comment Section Ep. 136
Summary
In this episode of the comment section show starring me, your fave, the mayor of Curtis Town, the one and only Curtus Connor, we talk about his journey to becoming a stand-up comedian, how he got his start on the internet, and what it's like being the Mayor of a small town.
Transcript
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knee down for nobody but god god i'm proposing to god you think he's taken
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yeah i'll see you're getting on your knees for another man dude pretty gay
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hey everyone and welcome back to another episode of the comment section show starring me your
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fave everybody knows me who cares about me on to the guest today we have the iconic the legendary
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the mayor the the mayor to end all mayors the one and only curtis connor
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thanks for having me welcome to the show thanks thank you mayor of curtis town yeah i almost
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that's my name don't wear it out yeah happy to have you on the show big fan for a long time
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yeah same yeah we did the your youtube together yeah we did our yeah we did my youtube we youtube
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together together yeah when was that like two two years ago i think fucking jesus i know and it was
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what's funny is uh curtis asked me when we met on on the zoom you were like can you record on your
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phone too just in case i'm like for sure oh and then i did and then my my phone died oh yeah something
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that i ran out of storage yeah and i had no idea so i we missed a good 30 minutes of it but it's you
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know what but i we pieced it together it made it work still had a blast yeah that was so much fun
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it was fun i have been a fan of yours for a very long time wow and i want to tell you the very first
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youtube video i saw of yours that like i was like oh yeah i'm locked in here all right that's when i
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i purchased my citizenship to curtis yeah yeah you have to purchase you have to buy it's really
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expensive yeah it's pretty fucked up there's a whole lot of layers to it yeah um it was your video
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you made about uh tiktok country boys oh that was the very first one i'd ever seen really that's
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like a super old video yeah that was the first one i saw because i remembered you from vine okay
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because wait i'm jumping all over the place okay so the genesis of your career yeah did you start you
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started on vine right uh yeah that's yeah pretty much yeah i started doing uh i started doing stand-up
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and then i was i wanted like a way to also be like writing and doing jokes and stuff yeah when i
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wasn't on stage and vine was like popping at the time yeah yeah uh yeah i started on vine did pretty
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pretty good on there i was having fun i put all my eggs in that basket and uh and then they dropped
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the basket then they threw it in the trash and then all my eggs broke um but then yeah then moved to
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youtube and it's been pretty good and how how was it building your youtube in the beginning was it like
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a lot different because vine was such a short form or was it more fun well i was trying to
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like like running in tandem with vine i was trying to do youtube also because like other people were
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doing it but i was like i just didn't know what to do on there i was like starting i was doing like
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sketches like i just it was like just trying to see what worked and it just like took so long and it
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really took me a while to really like hone in and sort of uh it only until i saw like my friends
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like danny and drew like they started doing like commentary and i was like okay i feel like that's
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something i would want to try totally gave it a try and then uh and not me drew by the way
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right good yeah drew good if y'all don't know yeah but uh yeah it was just uh it took a while a lot
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of fucking trial and error but um worked out thank god clearly yeah it's doing really well
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for the uh the youtube when you were did you learn how to edit your own stuff is that like what was
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taking you kind of a long time or did you already know how to do that i yeah i taught myself how to
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edit i mean it's not fucking rocket science but i just thought it's it was just like it was just
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years and years of just slowly doing it and just like getting better over time trial and error
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yeah and i actually worked at a startup a company called inkbox uh oh that's right yeah they make
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semi-permanent tattoos yeah and uh yeah i feel like i it it was great because i was like the head of
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video content there so i was like uh that was a term that i got to pick myself also it sounds like way
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sicker than i actually was but they're like what's your title what do you want it to be and i was like
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that one so um but that like like kind of forced me to edit like all day every day so it's like i got
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like pretty not good i just got like proficient a lot faster yeah quicker yeah because it is a it
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is a tedious process it's not necessarily hard depending on what you're doing yeah because that
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was the one thing the one like i've talked about how i'm like one of the few people i think who went
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to college and my degrees are useful in mine because i was a journalism and communications major
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so i learned how to edit i learned how to do sound and right talk on camera and all that stuff so
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damn like i learned all that in college so thankfully i can use it here but even so like editing
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is tedious it takes forever it takes a long time especially to get funny at it like because
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editing like a news package is what i was doing is one thing but like editing something that's
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supposed to be entertaining and funny it's a whole nother thing yeah i yeah but that's like the it's
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it's tedious though but it's like i feel like uh over the years i feel like i've developed like a
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style of editing that people i was just about to say yeah i was like your style is very funny and i
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think that's what people really love thanks yeah you're welcome i yeah i think if i stopped
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editing my own videos it'd be people would be pretty upset because like you would tell that
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it's like someone else you know yeah i've seen some of my friends who have been youtubers for a long
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time like they refuse to give up the editing because they're like they just don't get it yeah
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they're not going to match my freak the way i need them exactly yeah i need them to match my freak
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every time i would try to hire an editor that's what that was like the the thing the email i would send
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them like please just can you just please fucking match my freak yeah for what best regards curtis
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best regards curtis i think uh the when i saw your uh country boy video i first of all i was working
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in an office and i remember because i was watching it in my cubicle well like i was listening to it and
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i had it up listening to it me stealing time yeah um i was working but i was listening to the youtube
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video and i was laughing my ass off and my sister was in the cubicle next to me and she texted me and
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said what are you watching dude because she couldn't hear me going am i my fucking cubicle
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by myself whoa i was dead and you know why because your style of humor i love i love yourself where
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it's like silly and it's like it's it's very like silly and goofy and light-hearted but it's so
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specific and funny wow and i actually remember jokes from that video like you said that hat is so on
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that guy's head oh yeah you're talking about the guy his head was pushed so far
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i forgot i said that yeah shit like that like would it cracks me the fuck up because it's just so silly
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it like yeah it means nothing it's just so like whatever goofy yeah i know i'm so thankful for the
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those country guys making those tiktoks because it was so like i was just like such a baffling thing
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that nobody had really talked about it yet because it's like the like the juxtaposition of like a
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tough country guy like lip syncing to a fucking camera is like crazy like it's so backwards and
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the one you did about divorced dads like oh yeah yeah making tiktoks with their kids yeah those are so
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good what an obscene premise i know i wish tiktok existed when i was a kid so my dad could have made
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one of those how old are you i'm 30 30 big yeah i know god you're a million years older than me
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just kidding i'm gonna be 29 this year so okay i'm here younger than you uh we're both we're both
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up there yeah we're up there over the hill yep better to be over it than under it am i right yeah
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that's what i'm that i've always said wait before we move on me actively forgetting the bits oh guys chat
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listen up comment section chat we're introducing bits this is where we're gonna curtis do you know
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what the bit is is this real chat gbt is this real uh i was i was made aware of the bit okay so the bit
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is we're each gonna pick a phrase and then we'll we can read it to each other and then at some point
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in the conversation we're gonna try to work it in okay but without telling each other the goal is
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surprise okay ladies first oh don't mind if i do i'll catch one too let's see do you want me to read
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a yeah go ahead read her out loud talk about how you need water need water so i have to say that or
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do i have to do that in in a thirsty sense okay okay all right that's the one she was most excited
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about i think it's funny you picked that one and we're talking to my producer amanda by the way
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and this is also mine says the word tantalizing easy please child's play is that even a real word
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i just say it tantalizing next next bit super easy anyways what were we talking about oh you made one
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you made a video about divorced parents yeah recently divorced parents yeah dads who it's mostly dads yeah
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like it's always yeah who make tiktok like sad tiktoks with their daughters or sons yeah like
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this life's gonna be a little weird for a second but it's gonna be okay they're lip singing a song
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yeah and they're getting devastating news the kids are like it's always that fucking halsey song
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it's like tell me how's it feel the one where they they go like this and then something stops them
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and it's always like it's like have you seen the one with the lizard yeah i love that one it's like
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standing on a laundry basket yeah what'd you get to get your lizard do you like lizards uh i fuck with
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lizards yeah do you like are there any animals you're afraid of lizards funnily enough the uh the
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lizard in uh spider-man his canonically his name is uh kurt connors
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dr kurt connors so i do have a i do have a close relationship with lizards do you when it comes
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to the marvel y'all are one in the same yeah is that the lizard that jamie fox turns into or is that
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different that's uh he never was a lizard what is he then who's the guy he's electric oh he's
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electro wait i'm thinking of the doctor that turns himself he's trying to turn everybody into
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lizards yeah that's dr kurt connors oh okay okay okay sorry i'm not a fucking geek so i didn't know
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that i'm not a fucking pussy sorry i got laid in high school so i didn't have that lame oh that's
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the one he wanted to turn everyone into lizards his name was kurt connors yeah well i've never seen
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the two of you in the same room so how am i to know that's true i want to turn everyone into kurt
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connors not even a lizard just him everyone is me that would be a little horrifying that's a dream
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that's kurtistown that's a dream yeah you said in order to gain citizenship see this is why i revoked
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my citizenship or rescinded it because yeah we have to turn into you right it's just a lot of time and
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money it's a lot of yeah it's a lot of work it's a dedication a lot of surgeries a lot of uh
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we have a very similar build so that would have been easy yeah that's true people have said that
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okay so you said that you started uh doing stand-up and now you're doing stand-up all the
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time how has that journey been for you doing stand-up uh it's been great i uh that's how i got
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into into comedy and yeah just doing stand-up around toronto the greater toronto area the gta
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um and you guys know yeah canadians we know and uh yeah it's been great i mean it's like i've been
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doing it for so long now uh i did my first set when i was 19 wow and i'm fucking 30 now so um
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yeah i've been doing it for a while um and it's been great obviously um with like the internet stuff
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that's happened yeah it's been great that like like when i first started doing shows and like
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people from like vine would show up to like come to the shows it was crazy because it's like oh there's
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actual like people who like want to see me as opposed to like our big fans of you yeah as opposed to
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like it was just years of doing shows to just other comedians waiting to for to go on after me
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so uh so yeah it's obviously it's been great to have um both um things sort of like feed into each
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other too because i feel like when i do stand-up i feel really like it it just makes me a better
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writer makes me a better like even performer when i'm even just like recording a video yeah i just
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feel like more comfortable so it just it's been great and i i feel like i urge anybody to even just
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try it if they are making like funny content on the internet i just think it's like a great thing
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to try and if you hate it you hate it but if um you don't then you don't i yeah i was gonna say i i
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started i've only done stand-up once so far i did a small five nice um tight five yeah tight five
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tight five uh for a hilarious five if you will okay uh for my friend caleb harron um and he
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closed at the largo like his uh the end of his tour and he asked me to do five for him which i was
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like whoa which is really cool so the first time you did it was at that show at the largo at the largo
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yeah that's what every comedian was telling me they were like oh nice yeah cool friends in high
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places guys uh me just using caleb uh no i i love him dearly but i it was honestly like truly
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so intimidating i would never get really nervous about anything revolving work i i'm sure you could
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tell i'm a yapper at my fucking heart so i love to talk i love being recorded i don't mind being
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recorded like right yeah i never really get nervous uh doing anything for work but that i was so
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nervous to do yeah i can imagine it's just a whole nother yeah i didn't even and i didn't even
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factor that in which is funny because my manager he's been work he works he's worked in stand-up
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forever but he's toured people for so long and he was like the largo is huge dude that's like such a
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great yeah like a first one that's crazy and i was like well don't tell me more things because i'm
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gonna get more fucking nervous right and i think it's because i know i'm funny like haha online funny
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but i was like i just think stand-up is a completely different art form i have a lot of respect for
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stand-up i love stand-up so much so i didn't want to find out the hard way i was
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bad right because you know some some online people who are known for being funny like they
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immediately try stand-up and it just doesn't work yeah yeah it just doesn't translate different
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bone yeah it's completely different how did it go it went well it went really well i think so i
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didn't market it at all or tell anyone i was going because i told caleb i was like i really
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wanted to be a pure experience like i want the people who go if they have no idea who i am i just
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want to know if they think i'm funny right because if i market market it like my fans will come
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too which is a great thing but they'll laugh at anything i say really like because they love me and i
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think that's that's not a bad thing but i wanted to know for realsies if i was like funny like i was
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like i wanted like a stranger to tell me that for sure so it worked out for the best but i i was
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followed by chris fleming which is just like an unbelievable act to follow like i'm glad i didn't
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go after him obviously i didn't he did i think 15 but his was so fucking funny and then caleb obviously
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he's a powerhouse so wow that's quite the lineup good for you though that's wild that's like
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that's pretty nervous it's like where do you go from that down obviously yeah aim high yeah i start
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high and then end up at the bottom yeah but it's very i have a lot of respect for you doing that so
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often and so well because it's such an art form and i don't know how people like the memorizing part
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of it was the hardest part for me right yeah i was like i could barely do five i can't believe
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people can do an hour that's crazy yeah when i started doing i was i was pretty intimidated by
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doing an hour but once you're up there and like it's like it's kind of easy because it's like
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you wrote the jokes that's true that's what my friend caleb kept telling me he's like you're the
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one writing them so it's easier to remember them when you write them yeah because you're the one who
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like thought of them and wrote them down so it's like oh i can just remember the thing i wrote after
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but even then obviously it still happens all the time where i forget a joke i forget a tag or
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something and then it fucks me up later but yeah um but that's just that's just the business
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he told me caleb told me too he's like and honestly if you start like blanking a little
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bit he's like you can always look at your phone sometimes i just write like uh things on my notes
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that will remind me of my jokes so it's like yeah a few keywords that will remind me he goes or i'll
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just do crowd work a little bit to kind of fill space until you remember what yeah i was like well
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i was like okay and i was like he said especially if it's like feels like people aren't laughing you
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could lean towards crowd work because i'm good at making fun of people or doing things with
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another person right and so i was like okay and i was like well if that if those two plans don't
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work i did bring a gun so either way yeah we're all gonna be laughing someone's gonna laugh
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something will happen yeah something memorable will happen that night someone's gonna laugh and it
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whether by force or naturally laugh and so you're going you're currently on tour right kind of doing
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some doing some shows yeah doing some some shows around uh i'm just doing like comedy clubs um yeah
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i got shows in irvine this weekend um i had some shows we had phoenix went to appleton wisconsin
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i mean the life is just crazy oh god if the stories i could tell you about appleton wisconsin
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like where else did we go they're tantalizing yeah already damn got them yeah you could use that
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word if you want um about appleton wisconsin um how was that show they were sick the shows are awesome
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yeah great crowd yeah i feel i feel like uh it was weird because um we did early shows and late shows
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that weekend and the early shows were like fucking insanely good and then usually it's like the late shows
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are like even like the best ones because it's like people are you know a little more booze in them
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they're like all right late show we're getting crazy you know we're getting fucking wild you know and
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then um but but those ones it was like the polar opposite like the late shows in appleton wisconsin
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their energy was so low really and i was like i was thinking about it and i was like these people have
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never been up this late before places close there at like 3 p.m they're there in a bad mood yeah they're
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just like these way past i don't know what the fuck i'm doing here dude literally i was in
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appleton wisconsin and coffee i was going to a coffee shop like a local coffee shop and it was
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closed at fucking three o'clock that's like we're not even in like where'd y'all go yeah there's still
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so much of the day and it was like a friday too it was like i don't know but appleton was great
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loved it what's a what's a place you love performing no matter no matter what time of the year or
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um like city or state yeah country even i mean fucking i've only done some of the best shows i
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ever done were in australia which is really yeah australian crowds were fucking they get down oh
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really yeah i mean it's like i don't even they're just like so stoked about like everything they were
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down for any bit it was just like that's cool it was so cool i love a good sport yeah yeah and
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they're just like down all of all australians are just so silly they're just so goofy just a very
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silly energy about them yeah yeah lots of australian men really fucking hate me really past that
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yeah they do i don't know if they they i don't know if there's like misogyny in their water over
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there but like yeah a lot of their men are like that very strange yeah whenever i yeah when i was
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over there i i did i was pretty misogynistic when i was over there something about the air in that
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water you start like it's like the mask from jim carrey you're like yeah he's women
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i made that joke at um have you ever been to hoi uh no okay well there's a there's a place in
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hoi in onahu called the polynesian cultural center it's basically like my family and i because we're
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someone we're polynesian we call it a zoo because that's essentially what it is but like
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they have each island in polynesia and they're like exhibits and they're like live it's almost
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like a museum but they have people dressed culturally accurate and they just kind of hang
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out there and they act they act the part but not because they are if that makes sense okay so they
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just do demonstrations they show you at a basket leave whatever it's just like a big zoo okay and
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when we were there the other day the other day when we were there uh last month we were walking
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around and like i was saying because uh white people love going there for obvious reasons like
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it's cool it's cool because they do a lot of cultural dancing which is really fun to watch
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right um but they get really into it when they go there and i was like making a joke i was like
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it's like they come here and they start like wolverine they start like a lycanthrope they start
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turning into like they start like turning into a colonizer
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they're like run you know what i mean that's super funny my cousin was like it's like michael
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jackson's thriller like right yeah you just can't control it yeah it's like same thing when you go
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to australia yeah they just like you have to fight it yeah i mean i fit right in too because the mullet
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and everything like every australian guy they look just like me and it was like i felt like a it's
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like a hive mind just get swept up in it yeah it was we all moved as one unit it was pretty crazy
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multi-cells form one fist yeah it was like a megazord voltron yeah six cats all in one yeah
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one giant thing that's i was like when i started turning into something like that sounds like the
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transformers i was like yeah yep yep start speaking alien a little bit yeah it which like the end the
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other side of that for me is like i have a huge fan base in australia because so many women right
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like fuck with me because i've fucked up australian men before yeah well you have like a yeah that's
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like a yeah they're running concurrently it's like real a win is a win yeah i mean i guess i'll take it
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yeah i had one australian guy go on a podcast and talk about me but he didn't say my name even though
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they used so many of my videos in this clip and i was like you guys know my name but you you had to
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search me up to find my shit and use it but when he was saying he called me some bitch on tiktok
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which that's like my tagline over there i was like this bitch on tiktok which like he's bitch on tiktok
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yeah exactly that might be new zealand i don't know i always get them mixed up a little bit me too
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with the accent yeah which is funny because when i said that he was australian um some people were like
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girl he's from new zealand i'm all potato potato all right yeah they're fucking beside each other
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he's talking shit on me yeah yeah you guys got the gist right okay make sure you cross the line
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you didn't directly correctly say where he's from and he uh he even said he's like yeah she is you
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know she makes these videos and they're so negative and blah blah blah like denigrating towards men but
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that's too big of a word for him but they're just they're mean to men and in the middle of him
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describing me he goes and she's a pretty big girl anyways and i could not stop laughing because i
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was like that's just drive-by fat phobia it's like she's a fat bitch by the way anyways whoa any i know
00:23:00.100
you're wondering if she's fat yes she is um anyway just that drive-by shit like that i'm like that's
00:23:05.260
funny yeah i find that funny you you prefer the drive-bys than the i just think if you surprise me
00:23:11.440
yeah i'm like wow i wasn't expecting you had the misdirection yeah uh speaking of when you and i
00:23:17.760
made a youtube video when we youtubed back in the day four score and seven years ago it feels like
00:23:24.400
it was a while ago yeah we were also talking about men because you've talked about men a few times and
00:23:28.840
like silly men a lot of different genres of men yeah yeah and uh i remember we talked about the
00:23:34.700
that one guy i don't even remember his name but i know he had the bullet necklace
00:23:38.140
yeah and he was like teaching men how to how to be alphas and how to get women yeah did you take a lot
00:23:44.800
from those videos yeah yeah i learned a lot i remember well what was their one their one thing
00:23:49.880
i remember was they like hated women who had debt yeah they got fucking debt i got fucking debt which
00:23:56.240
is crazy he's like yeah they have debt yeah everyone has like everybody has that everybody has like
00:24:03.100
literally everybody has that that's such a wild take yeah you said if you have a designer bag but
00:24:08.120
and you're not a doctor oh yeah you probably have debt right which is such a straight like
00:24:15.920
you have to be a doctor first of all to own anything luxury the only way yeah i guess the
00:24:23.140
only way women make money is being a doctor yeah and that's it that's the only way doctor
00:24:28.140
stay-at-home wife or bitch on tiktok yeah i created a new path for us follow me ladies
00:24:34.400
yeah we could go somewhere else with this but i i remember in the um in your video i was like
00:24:41.200
honored that you had asked me and it was funny because my boyfriend is like he wasn't really into
00:24:46.500
youtube like he didn't really watch youtube very often but like when he and i started dating um a few
00:24:51.640
years in that's when i started watching you on youtube and so i would be like you should watch him
00:24:54.600
he's funny like you'll you'll like his style yeah and he was a big fan oh cool so when i when you asked
00:24:59.840
me um he was like that's so cool i was like right but he didn't want to come today so okay
00:25:05.180
just kidding i didn't even ask him so i'm not that big of a fan i guess so clearly a fake fan well
00:25:11.520
damn that's cool though yeah he was uh you converted him to a youtube watcher wow yeah he was a youtube
00:25:17.880
guy he was at the time yeah like back in the day you know youtube we've shifted all now to like
00:25:22.380
tiktok and so sometimes i go back to my my roots of youtube but i was going to ask like have you
00:25:27.420
noticed any sort of change like with the introduction of tiktok like how that's
00:25:30.940
worked in tandem like with your youtube or is it kind of just business as usual yeah i think i'm
00:25:37.080
i'm pretty lucky with where i am on youtube because i sort of like i guess it's weird because it's like
00:25:44.500
i started short form i started on short form content yeah uh and then i moved into long form and now it's
00:25:50.600
like going back to more short form again yeah uh but i think in the time i was doing long form i think
00:25:58.240
that's where i kind of my bread and butter is now so it's like i've always i've used tiktok but it's
00:26:03.520
like i've never leaned on it yeah i just like fucked around on there so it's like uh i have there is
00:26:09.440
still like a lot of people who do want to watch long videos on youtube no for sure so it's like
00:26:14.600
yeah there's sometimes i'm like i've tried uploaded like youtube shorts and it's just like it doesn't
00:26:19.000
it's like it's what's it's not it's not worth the effort yeah it's just another thing yeah i get
00:26:23.700
to spend the time doing the long videos that actually totally makes sense yeah there's like
00:26:29.020
i i sometimes when there's new things i'm like i can't do another thing yeah there's too much do
00:26:34.660
another thing please don't give me another thing like when they introduced reels i was like
00:26:38.720
girl yeah i'm dying there's too many things reels yeah thankfully with youtube shorts i was like
00:26:44.860
i'm cool yeah i'm cool off that yeah although sometimes i've never done obviously i've never
00:26:51.040
done youtube videos or anything like that but sometimes i did post youtube shorts once because
00:26:55.280
i was in a like a partnership with youtube shorts for a little and so i just did like they told me
00:27:00.220
i had to post like however many videos or whatever in a certain amount of time and i'm like period
00:27:03.560
right easy and then the way i i was like oh that's so easy like it's just like in three months you
00:27:08.520
to post like 80 videos something like that and i the way i uploaded 60 of them like two weeks before
00:27:15.040
the deadline is insane i was just like firing them off i'm like what's another clip i have
00:27:19.140
wow you're just doing it at the end and then i'm like wow it didn't do that well
00:27:24.220
i wonder why god my engagement wasn't very good on those youtube shorts i wonder maybe it's because
00:27:28.560
i flooded the algorithm like a fucking bot two weeks before my deadline yeah maybe yeah there's too
00:27:34.060
many too many fucking apps these fuck these days all your b-reels and your fucking what else is
00:27:41.260
these damn kids yeah that that was crazy how b-real was so popular for like one summer and then like
00:27:49.220
never again oh my god i know i was great i never i never got it but i that was one that i got and then
00:27:54.820
i stayed consistent for like maybe a month yeah if that i missed like fucking eight days in that month
00:28:01.680
but like wow i still did and then i was like hey i'm not doing this anymore yeah oh this isn't
00:28:06.180
required i'm not doing it it's not required yeah it's like oh yeah this is this is taxing for me
00:28:13.540
and it's really not it's just a picture it is a picture yeah it's like i feel like i well i'm curious
00:28:18.380
to know because you've been in the game for so long if it's kind of disillusioned your idea of social
00:28:23.740
media like now that it's your job so it's like you know sometimes it's just not as fun anymore because
00:28:28.420
it's work so you have to do it all the time right post and stuff when you're not posting for
00:28:32.540
fun yeah or whatever yeah i i don't know i feel like it's maybe it's different because you're on
00:28:38.720
youtube yeah maybe yeah i feel like because when i post on youtube it's so like far in between it's
00:28:44.320
like it's like once or two times a month so it's like and even then it's like it's still so much fun
00:28:49.660
i like it even just like like putting it like a stupid tweet or something or like a stupid
00:28:56.580
like it's i it's super fun i just like i can't imagine like i feel i can't imagine using social
00:29:02.260
media and not being a like a content career yeah or like even just like a com a comedian or like who
00:29:09.580
makes like comedy content because it's like if i had to do other shit i'd be like this is fucking
00:29:13.780
boring i know caleb has told me he's like if i could just get rid of social media just
00:29:19.640
do be a comic like yeah i would do that immediately like if i didn't need this i would
00:29:24.360
really interesting yeah he's told me that before and i think it's because he's only ever been in
00:29:28.800
comedy and then just recently started gotcha doing social yeah you kind of have to now yeah yeah
00:29:34.100
exactly which is what he told me he was like if i could get rid of it i would immediately damn and i
00:29:38.440
was like damn can't relate yeah i need attention too bad yeah i feel like it's i feel like for me it's
00:29:44.440
not even attention i feel like it's just like there's just so much you could do it's just so fun
00:29:48.200
just just fart around and just have like a like a well i thought i was gonna find community with
00:29:52.820
you clearly i can't sorry forget it not this time wrong guy you got the wrong guy also i do want to
00:30:01.400
mention too curtis asked me this when he first sat down if he was the first straight man to ever be
00:30:05.100
on the show the second actually big title big number two first or second the best yeah go ahead and
00:30:12.180
tell tell that to carlo my buddy who came on two years ago maybe yeah two years ago been a while
00:30:17.520
sorry carlo yeah see so take that to all the men who hate me clearly i don't hate they don't all
00:30:24.040
hate me yeah yeah because there's one right here sitting in the chair trust me they don't watch my
00:30:30.040
show yeah yeah that's the equivalent of being like i'm not racist i have a black fan yeah yeah i'm like
00:30:36.600
see at least one yeah at least one it's funny because when i did that youtube video with you too i had
00:30:41.980
i did have some youtube video with you too with youtube with with bono i didn't see that one with
00:30:48.320
bono specifically but he didn't have to force me like when they put that album on my ipod
00:30:51.880
they didn't have to force me yeah songs of innocence is that what it's called right
00:30:56.240
i yeah you would you look like you would know a lot more about youtube than i would
00:31:01.020
that's true i think based off perception alone you would know way more about youtube than me
00:31:05.840
yeah you're right my understanding of any sort of like band like that is is non-existent
00:31:13.140
really yeah like i was telling once i don't even remember what i was talking about but i was talking
00:31:17.720
to my boyfriend about something and i go they make music like that what's that one band you know the
00:31:22.980
one they like it's like the older white guys and they do like rock music and he goes there's like
00:31:27.520
so many that's most bands that's most bands and i go oh yeah like guns and roses or something and he
00:31:33.100
goes i don't know probably because yeah i still have not said what it is i'm trying to describe
00:31:37.540
and i'm like i don't fucking know it was one of those damn did you not did you not remember which
00:31:41.260
one it was no i i think it was if i'm being honest i think it was led zeppelin and i was yeah i was
00:31:46.300
talking about guns and roses the whole time okay and as far as i know they could be the same they
00:31:50.460
pretty much i feel like those two are like to me the same as like if i saw two white guys it could
00:31:55.940
be imagined dragons or it could be the chain smokers like i don't know yeah well yeah that's fair i don't know
00:32:01.040
like i'd believe you if you told me i'd be like sure yeah it's like the yeah there's a lot of bands
00:32:06.420
like like the killers would be another one like i know them you know them is is personally yeah
00:32:11.920
wait is dave girl on the killers come on no that's the foo fighters all right my sister was so mad at
00:32:17.840
me for a second sorry sorry sorry sorry sorry sorry the killers is mr bright side yes yes look at me
00:32:24.440
white culture i know about it i study about it you know obviously i know about it but when i when i did
00:32:30.920
the youtube video with you i remember i did get some hate comments because at the time i was like
00:32:36.300
that was like my huge wave so i had like so much hate and so much love all at the same time and i
00:32:43.040
had i had some dudes being like i can't believe curtis would make a video with her she sucks like and
00:32:49.640
they're sending me that okay i think you sent it to the wrong i don't think you're supposed to send me
00:32:56.180
that shit some and then i would they would dm that shit to me they'd be like i can't believe
00:33:00.520
he made a video with you you're not even fucking funny and i was like well well well yeah the mayor
00:33:06.580
says otherwise exactly also it's weird to to be confused to that i would make a video with you
00:33:13.240
because i feel like we did we did pretty similar stuff yeah absolutely it made sense of like weird
00:33:19.020
dudes yeah so it's like i was like he's not a fan of you either i don't know what part of that's not
00:33:23.740
clear like i'm just a lot meaner than he is but like we're on the same side yeah and that's actually
00:33:29.440
funny because sometimes they'll say that to my boyfriend they're like i feel bad for you man
00:33:32.820
that you're like that he's with me and he's like they're like yeah someone needs to save him like
00:33:38.160
they'll say weirdo shit like that all the time to my boyfriend and then he goes like i also hate
00:33:42.120
you like i don't know what's not clear about that like i think you're getting a little confused
00:33:46.460
like i also don't like you like she's just a lot more vocal about it than me right and that's i'm
00:33:52.440
like you have a beautiful wife whom i love and adore yeah sure and actually she and i were
00:33:56.360
mutuals before you and i were mutuals yeah she was with your wife before you uh and i think she's
00:34:01.420
so sweet and so funny and i think you would agree absolutely yeah let's see like both of our spouses
00:34:06.460
didn't come even though they're both fans of either of us that's true yeah interesting what's that
00:34:11.580
about what's that about all right we'll figure that out we'll be yeah i'm gonna make some calls
00:34:15.680
after this but okay we'll transition into speaking of the youtube we're uh transitioning
00:34:21.880
into our topic which is the psychology of male dating experts uh posting self-improvement videos
00:34:28.240
on tiktok obviously curtis has come across many a dating expert i'm sure oh you did i think you did
00:34:34.360
a youtube video on like a really old uh pickup artists like reality show or something you said
00:34:40.020
you used to watch it when you were younger if i remember the vip yeah that's a great fucking show
00:34:46.480
and they were all pickup artists yeah he was being coached by one yeah so the premise of the keys the
00:34:51.320
vip i believe it's a canadian show a resident where did our resident canadian go when she comes back
00:34:57.340
we'll tell her i'll bring up he's the vip so keys the vip was like a game show two guys would
00:35:02.740
battle it out with these with each other competing against each other yeah and it would um it actually i
00:35:07.260
think a film in toronto but there was like two guys in a nightclub the camera's everywhere and like
00:35:11.960
each uh and there's four judges sort of like judging like watching it the whole time and they
00:35:17.840
would pick who won each round so each round the two guys would go out into the dance floor they try to
00:35:22.280
pick up like get a girl's number okay um but there was like challenges within each like thing so it's
00:35:27.900
like you have to get a girl's number but you have to insult her first or you gotta like a classic move
00:35:33.960
yeah you gotta like you gotta do like a weird dance first or something so yeah i watched that
00:35:40.400
in my formative years like late night on the comedy channel and um i do yeah it was awesome
00:35:47.620
really entertaining bits from your video and you were like i thought that guy was the coolest guy
00:35:52.320
oh yeah he had a soul patch and i thought that was awesome this guy's got it all figured out
00:36:00.120
guys on to something it was yeah i was at a time where like if you just like were a guy with like
00:36:06.560
longer hair that was like the coolest thing yeah it was like you were long pin straight hair
00:36:11.980
soul patch like a fucking leather jacket a brown leather jacket yeah it has to be brown yeah it has
00:36:18.480
to be brown the bluest jeans yeah the bluest jeans a tight black top yeah and then like maybe a
00:36:24.180
little choker like a little necklace yeah like a cross yeah fuck yeah i wanted to look i thought that
00:36:29.480
was awesome like chris angel type vibe yeah yeah did you ever watch the american gladiator
00:36:35.280
documentary series on netflix uh no okay there was this show back in the 80s and like 90s that was
00:36:42.460
called american gladiator i used to watch it yeah okay so they did a documentary on it on netflix it's
00:36:47.080
really funny it's like it's crazy and it's like so entertaining but um my boyfriend was like dude can
00:36:53.280
we watch this because he used to watch that show and so did my family and i when we were kids i was
00:36:57.440
like yeah let's watch it and when we were watching it i remember the main one of the main guys my
00:37:03.560
boyfriend was like i thought that guy was the coolest guy who ever existed he's like i think
00:37:10.020
it's because he kind of looks like me like a little bit did right he had long hair okay and he was like
00:37:15.160
racially ambiguous and then he was just like a cool guy yeah it's so funny thinking back to the dudes who
00:37:21.360
that you thought were so sick because they were fucking not at all but as a young boy you don't
00:37:26.580
know alex our resident canadian do you remember the show keys to the vip yes our resident canadian
00:37:33.860
said she loved that show as well yeah it was so good it sounds like there was an american dating
00:37:40.340
show called next that was really popular oh yes yes you know there was also parental control which
00:37:46.840
that one i loved that one room raiders was a good one also what was the one it was like my own
00:37:52.540
or made do you remember that one my own do you remember that one my own so they basically would
00:37:58.900
bring it was always women but they would bring women and who had celebrity crushes and then they
00:38:04.200
would say like i want my own version of this person and the one episode i remember is adam levine
00:38:10.560
like she was like obsessed with adam levine she's like i love maroon 5 i love adam levine
00:38:14.720
whoa i want my own adam levine so they would pick three guys that bear somewhat of a passing
00:38:19.700
resemblance to him they never looked like them right and then they would give them a makeover
00:38:23.620
and like dress them and then they would put them in these little moving sets and so she would sit in
00:38:29.120
the audience and then they would move the set and it would be like a new guy and then he would
00:38:33.680
either i don't remember if it was lip singing or if it was live but he would like he was singing
00:38:37.900
that one fucking song that's really popular for maroon 5 the oh fuck there's a lot of them all
00:38:45.280
their songs are so they all sound the same i can't even sing the melody in my fucking that one that
00:38:49.780
one of them sang that one and then the other one was the sunday morning one sunday morning rain is
00:38:54.420
that one and i remember i remember she ended up picking that guy but my sister and i would watch
00:39:00.160
and we were like wow this is genius you can get your own and they look nothing like them right
00:39:04.840
and every time we talk about that show no one remembers that shit yeah i don't remember it
00:39:10.140
either it's like it was like yeah it's like my own i was like dude this is the funniest show in the
00:39:15.060
world my own okay so we're gonna be talking about speaking of keys to the vip curtis has been giving
00:39:21.060
keys to the vip for a while now major learning learning from all the pickup artists uh the male dating
00:39:28.040
experts okay so for this video this first one uh so oh it says both of these tiktoks are made by the
00:39:35.840
same guy nice okay he's a self-described quote dating slash self-improvement coach he has a website
00:39:42.660
where men can sign up to calculate their smv which stands for their sexual market value and get tips
00:39:50.260
and get tips from this guy on how to improve it in this first video he talks about how most girls are
00:39:57.220
amazing actors and don't show their true personality until you've been dating them for
00:40:01.140
six months to a year and an easy question you can ask yourself to see if you've settled is
00:40:05.880
would austin that guy who makes the videos he's like would austin approve me of me dating this girl
00:40:12.800
so that's his video being like make sure you calculate your smv sexual market value how do you
00:40:18.860
how do you do that how do you calculate what goes into that i don't know it says it says he has a
00:40:24.460
website where you can sign up which i'm assuming is behind a paywall damn i want to find out what
00:40:28.540
mine is you should go home and sign up yeah you do get your sexual market value yeah i'm curious
00:40:34.240
like a car right it's like show me the car facts yeah show me the sexual market value
00:40:38.840
damn so what if they needed a spokesperson for it you could be like that little fox that does the car
00:40:45.640
facts yeah you need to be like sexual market value yeah i don't know if we i'm familiar with the
00:40:50.900
fox on car facts yeah have you ever seen those commercials on our canadian forget it sorry god
00:40:56.400
that joke just went right over him sorry oh jesus anyways yeah i'm not familiar with you said you
00:41:03.420
want to calculate your sexual market value i'm pretty curious this is it well it's only is it for
00:41:08.980
guys or girls it's for guys guys do it okay yeah he says all the men should sign up for it oh you
00:41:15.160
gotta sign up that's why i said his mind paywall oh my god when i've seen um i made a video once and
00:41:22.500
i was this guy was like you know don't get distracted by women in your 20s like they're
00:41:27.080
trying to distract you from your bread like making making all that paper and i was like okay what man
00:41:32.380
is making a bunch of money in their 20s i wasn't doing that in my 20s i'm not a man but right i mean
00:41:37.520
i guess i wouldn't know because i'm just a but a simple woman but i think i remember he was saying
00:41:43.860
that about you know women like scam men out of their money and like this whole gold diggers
00:41:49.100
ideology and i remember saying i'm like i don't understand like you guys are absolutely always
00:41:55.080
getting scammed but it's by men like that yeah like you're getting scammed by men who you believe
00:42:00.760
are like teaching you the tools right to get women and it's honestly really simple i feel like to get
00:42:07.580
women to like you it's just like be nice to them and pay attention yeah i've always been so baffled
00:42:13.600
by the that like narrative being like you need to do this and that you gotta fucking a rabbit's
00:42:21.120
fun yeah you gotta say all this shit you gotta make sure you're standing this way yeah um yeah
00:42:27.900
and it's like fuck just don't be a fucking weirdo it's like it's so easy it's really quite simple
00:42:33.340
yeah and it's like even i don't know even even caleb has told me he's like if you just like get
00:42:39.220
a hobby like you could easily find a girl yeah you just find an interest right ask a question and
00:42:44.540
listen like go to like a fucking party with your friends you'll there'll be other people there
00:42:50.920
probably right and you'll be a weirdo and don't be a weirdo yeah i don't know i feel like they
00:42:56.020
overcomplicate shit like that a lot yeah it's because yeah i think they do this cool thing where
00:43:01.800
they don't really see like women as like people which i think it's pretty awesome and um they're
00:43:07.460
really on to something yeah so it kind of just fucks with how they like navigate the interaction
00:43:11.380
because they're it's not just like trying to listen to them and talk to them it's they're just being
00:43:15.820
like how can i put my wiener how can i sufficient way to put my wiener in this bitch let's think as
00:43:22.280
she's standing there listening yeah he's saying it out loud how doth my wiener
00:43:27.020
excuse me he has a fedora yeah it's it's it's so crazy too because i always think
00:43:33.080
if you like you said if you just weren't a fucking weirdo it'd be a lot easier yeah but i think to
00:43:38.380
overcomplicate it with all of these like tips and tricks and like books and shit like yeah my my
00:43:45.620
boyfriend actually knew this guy who he like went to our gym at one point but he had asked my boyfriend
00:43:52.020
like so like how do you talk to women and he goes i don't because i'm in a relationship and he's like
00:43:58.280
no but like me before that he goes i don't know i just like like i would any other right yeah like
00:44:04.040
he was like no but like specifically like he was asking my boyfriend these really pointed questions
00:44:08.320
and he's like i honestly don't know how to answer your question he goes well it's okay because i
00:44:12.300
actually bought a book to learn and it was it was like a pickup artist book and this was last year
00:44:16.900
oh no i can't even i don't even i was in such disbelief that we're like in the 2023 at the
00:44:23.620
point at that point yeah and he bought a physical copy of like a pickup artist book that's like crazy
00:44:29.160
he's like i'm gonna read this and then i'll know for sure and he was like no what yeah what do you
00:44:35.080
mean no what could possibly be in that book i'm frightened what do you mean no what then they'll know
00:44:40.580
yeah what i've always loved the term that they use the word artist for it to like pick up artist
00:44:45.920
is so funny like they're just like in like a fucking what are those saying the beret yeah
00:44:51.860
i'm like an easel yeah they're like it's the same thing yeah like they called picasso a madman in
00:44:57.960
his time too yeah i'm a starving artist starving pickup artist starving and i also i always think
00:45:05.800
too like if let's just say pickup artists do go on dates what do you tell people you do for a living
00:45:10.040
right do you tell them you're a pickup artist right yeah if if that does happen which i'm sure it
00:45:15.740
doesn't but if it does like if they got a date if they're like if they're a practicing pickup that's
00:45:19.780
their job yeah yeah they're practicing or is it more like a spider-man thing we're like right
00:45:24.820
you gotta keep yeah they gotta keep a secret their alter ego yeah yeah they're peter parker and
00:45:29.540
spider-man or like clark or kirk connor's lizard yeah until he turns into the lizard yeah he has to
00:45:36.980
like keep it a secret and then one day she finds like a fucking like she's like oh my god you just
00:45:43.640
missed it the pickup artist was right outside he goes wow i can't believe i missed it and then yeah
00:45:47.720
she finds like a cross necklace yeah puts the pieces together he's laying upside down in keys to
00:45:58.300
the vip to give her a kiss on the lips i gotta watch that show today that's so good there's a lot of
00:46:05.440
episodes on youtube i gotta watch that show too to be honest i i feel like water can i get some
00:46:14.560
fucking water i'm gonna stop this podcast if i don't get some water i'll burn this place to the
00:46:21.400
ground i don't get some water i'll put out with the water was that the bit did it say chug your
00:46:26.500
water so that you can demand more uh was that the secret well it said i'll can i read it the whole thing
00:46:32.360
now it said uh talk about how you need water bonus stop the podcast because you need it so bad
00:46:38.600
and you did in fact do that and i did i threatened to i didn't actually stop it it's okay it didn't
00:46:44.540
come to violence thankfully yeah i was this close okay let me read some of the comments on this
00:46:50.820
video this says this one says they ain't worth it and the good part is that you could sniff them from
00:46:56.140
the onset of your head is in the game what huh did you just cast a spell on me you can sniff them
00:47:03.500
yeah the good part is that you could sniff them from the onset of your head is in the game
00:47:08.600
and then the that song from high school musical starts playing
00:47:12.400
do you think drew seeley's mad that he wasn't in that movie but he used his vocals
00:47:20.940
probably yeah i always think i would be pissed i would be super mad and then they didn't even
00:47:24.940
bring him back for the second or third one didn't even bother they were like we got what we needed i
00:47:28.780
got this i'll take it from here pal imagine you're in like final auditions and then they're
00:47:34.940
like great voice horrible face gotta put that voice in someone else's face yeah my bad yeah that
00:47:41.500
sucks i hope he got paid for it drew see i assume he got i mean like well yeah do you think he still
00:47:47.780
gets royalties from it i don't know i don't know you big fan of the high school musical series yes
00:47:51.980
me too i'm a big fan which one's your fave two obviously yeah the right answer of course yeah
00:47:57.740
two is the best i don't want to hear any guff about it from anybody it will be blocked it will
00:48:03.280
be deleted when you comment that disagrees this next one says they don't deserve rights protection
00:48:08.520
or to be defended either okay whoa oh oh and their username has the joker in it so
00:48:16.480
whenever men compare themselves to the joker or anyone of that like caliber i'm always like
00:48:25.940
you know what happened right like you know what he did right that's even more frightening like
00:48:30.420
they're yeah they're like patrick bates they'll compare themselves to him too yeah yeah it's
00:48:34.820
interesting how uh because the joker he's i'm trying to like think of why they would want to be like the
00:48:44.520
joker just they want to kill kill people like kill someone on live television yeah that's the only
00:48:52.080
reason i can think yeah they want to be able to do that and then dance on the steps outside yeah
00:48:56.560
i don't know yeah pretty interesting okay you're talking about the joaquin phoenix joker yeah that's
00:49:02.660
that's who he has oh he has that one okay not not like he's like he's ledger i could kind of get
00:49:07.780
because that's just like a great performance great character yeah yeah um but it's always
00:49:12.360
the joaquin one's weird yeah it's always him that one's a little too grounded in reality
00:49:17.860
yeah that's what's a little some of you are for sure the joker like i don't know yeah don't you
00:49:22.580
don't need to aspire like you're walking in those shoes right now girl yeah and you're just as pale
00:49:27.660
as him without the white face paint just as horrifying just as scary there's green because you
00:49:33.260
haven't seen the sun and greasy yeah you don't shower it's real it's real hat on a hat for them
00:49:38.880
uh this one says put their acting skills to the test and tell them when does my free trial end
00:49:44.780
and then he put the sunglasses emoji okay the fuck does that mean okay what the fuck does that
00:49:53.420
mean i think it's because he says women are really good actors and they won't show you their real
00:50:00.040
personality or like who they really are for like six months to a year whoa i feel like most people
00:50:05.540
do that when they start dating you know you call it like the lying phase like you just fit you fib
00:50:10.560
about shit like little shit right not actual lies but like things were like for example if you go
00:50:16.860
somewhere and you're they're like do you want anything and you're like just probably like a
00:50:20.340
small like yeah okay like i'd be lying right like what'd you do today i'm like nothing really you know
00:50:26.680
what i mean like i just like fib about little shit right because you just want you want to be
00:50:30.940
impressive right you want to like portray yourself as like a cooler version of yourself yeah i was like i
00:50:35.980
think all parties do that when you first start dating because you want to like yeah show off a
00:50:39.820
little bit like yeah that you're awesome right yeah you're like oh just just reading reading all
00:50:44.120
day god just expanding my mind yeah my thoughts meditating just yeah just growing growing mentally
00:50:51.100
realistically i was been on fortnight all day or something it's funny because for me like i film a
00:50:57.040
lot of my videos in the bathroom like on the toilet i just find that to be my i always tell people
00:51:01.640
it's my office yeah i'm going to the studio right you gotta talk shit while shitting yeah that's
00:51:08.620
method acting for me yeah so my boyfriend literally told me that my dogs think that that's my crate
00:51:14.360
like because every time they come in my room to look for me they go straight there which is
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00:52:19.960
he's funny he's not I remember when I was like filming when I film in the in the bathroom and
00:52:27.520
shit like now like my boyfriend knows it's funny and sometimes I'm not even going to the bathroom
00:52:31.000
I'm just sitting on the toilet in there wow just find it to be peaceful in there sometimes yeah you
00:52:34.860
got you know I need some me time everyone's got their space yeah you need your own personal space
00:52:39.560
my own toilet time it's like when they have tummy time for like babies toilet time when I was first
00:52:46.640
dating my boyfriend and I couldn't have toilet time I was being suppressed I was being silenced
00:52:52.260
like you didn't want to go to the bathroom when you I did but I couldn't be in there for very long
00:52:56.900
right because it's still in the early days right yeah I couldn't have toilet time I couldn't just sit
00:53:01.260
in there and fuck around he can't know that he can't know that you crap you know he can't know that
00:53:05.660
I'm in there cooking yeah you know yeah yeah he can't know that about me you're not yet you know
00:53:11.660
dropping logs dropping the kids off at the pool dropping the kids off at the pool
00:53:16.520
you know yeah that's so interesting what's something silly that you fibbed about when you
00:53:21.660
were first dating um I'm trying to think um I can't really remember anything I mean I'm sure there
00:53:30.220
must have been like tiny stuff like being like yeah I was just so busy writing all day you just
00:53:35.380
filming and writing got this show later you're unemployed yeah yeah yeah definitely yeah probably
00:53:43.100
shit like that trying to make it seem like I was like like smarter or like cooler than I was but
00:53:48.820
yeah I was just didn't last long the facade yeah yeah I remember one of the ones one of the fibs I
00:53:55.220
told my boyfriend and he knows this too now but like he used to always chew orange gum okay like orange
00:54:01.760
flavored gum and I hated that gum like I just hated the because if you're kissing like I can
00:54:07.840
taste it and I just there was something about it I was just like hey I couldn't stand it yeah so
00:54:12.400
then and I didn't know how to tell him and I even like asked my sister I'm like how do I bring up that
00:54:16.100
I really hate the taste of that gum and then she was like just tell him and I was like oh it's still
00:54:21.080
too early to be honest so then I made up a story about how like I ate orange flavored gum once and I
00:54:27.140
vomited and so every time I tasted it makes me want to vomit which is not technically a lie
00:54:31.640
right the build-up is the vehicle is a falsity but yeah the messaging was true right um and so
00:54:38.840
he was like oh my gosh and so he just threw all of it out and never bought it ever again
00:54:42.180
wow and then I didn't know he was gonna do that and then about two years in I was like can I tell
00:54:47.040
you something I have something to confess to you I just didn't like orange gum yeah I just really I
00:54:53.040
just hated the taste of it it just like it grossed me out does he ever so he quit cold turkey right
00:54:57.320
yeah wow off the orange gum wow the power of the power of love yeah really the things you sacrifice
00:55:05.320
for the ones you love orange gum okay I'll read I'll read one more of these this last video okay so
00:55:13.080
in this video the same guy talks about how he's never gonna get married but if he did he would
00:55:17.940
absolutely not get down on one knee to propose to a woman he says kneeling is for beta boys that's
00:55:24.240
super funny yeah what's the alternative then standing like a man standing yeah he gets on
00:55:30.640
stilts so he's even taller taller yeah or he could do the the shane dawson one where like he was on
00:55:36.280
both both knees you ever see that picture that's fucking my favorite shit ever do that that's a power
00:55:42.920
move wearing that fucking pig shirt yeah yeah get on both knees
00:55:46.800
that's crazy yeah switch it up never let them know your next move yeah do a handstand yeah sit
00:55:55.380
in a deep squat right so legs will why the handstand works because you're still doing the ring up to
00:56:02.440
them yeah but you're sort of peacocking you're you're showing your dominance by you know showing
00:56:08.560
that you know you're breaking the norm yeah you're really sticking it to your fiancee yeah because one
00:56:13.220
hand handstand one hand with the ring and you go ma'am my lady yeah would you make me the happiest
00:56:19.800
man you're gonna marry me or some shit yeah i'm not a fucking cuck so yeah i'm not a cuck boy so i'm
00:56:26.180
not gonna obviously not gonna kneel i'm not gonna put go on my knee for anything did you go on your
00:56:30.080
knee yeah i did yeah like a fucking beta okay i'm gonna go on too like you said yeah i went down
00:56:37.840
one knee and uh somehow she said yes even though i was on one knee it's embarrassing she said although
00:56:44.920
this is the most beta pose i've ever seen yeah okay yeah fine fine i'll look past it i'm willing
00:56:50.880
to make peace with the beta pose that you're sticking and i was dressed like the joker naturally
00:56:56.280
yeah and you were on late night yeah with a gun in your hand yeah threatening jenna to marry you
00:57:02.300
and it worked and shockingly she said yes can you believe it you want to know how i got this wife
00:57:08.440
it's real simple it's crazy what people will do when you point a gun at them
00:57:14.640
it's pretty crazy it's actually crazy what people will do okay this comment says uh i think it's
00:57:22.200
supposed to say kneel but it says knee down for nobody but god god i'm proposing to god i think he's
00:57:30.960
taken yeah i'll see you're getting on your knees for another man dude pretty gay it's pretty sus bro
00:57:38.620
you'd be a cuck for god yeah okay all right happy june
00:57:52.900
uh wait really quick i went to this is already public knowledge now so i can talk about it but i
00:58:01.080
i went to one of quest love's game nights did you know do you know about those do you know quest love
00:58:05.400
and the roots yeah so he he bought my book um he's publishing my book but he invited me to a game night
00:58:11.460
and he has these really like famous game nights that are like secrets cool and uh not anymore yeah well
00:58:17.340
they're not the game night's not a secret but the invites are private right and so like it it's
00:58:23.180
they're famous because he posts pictures of them and then they have just the most famous people in
00:58:27.920
the world well like at these like and the one i went to there were a lot of famous people there
00:58:32.400
which is crazy i was like i feel like i'm trojan horsing in here right i've snuck in i've got past
00:58:37.900
security who else who was like a big celeb there can you say yeah i think yeah because they're in the
00:58:42.640
pictures jj abrams was there whoa i met rachel ziegler she was really really nice cool
00:58:47.280
nice i played uno against rachel ziegler and her boyfriend and baby face for a long time
00:58:52.560
whoa which is so funny because i was first of all like i was texting when i was uh telling or telling
00:58:59.620
my family about it after i was like i the way i cannot control my competitive nature even in that
00:59:06.220
right you still had to i have to win like that's my like it's taking over me you know the scarab on my
00:59:13.580
back like the blue beetle it's like right embedding itself in me and so when i was like
00:59:18.920
joking about it uh with my friends and my sister i was like telling him i was like yeah and i was
00:59:23.000
like and i gave rachel ziegler that fucking work in uno and we were like laughing she she thought i
00:59:27.140
was so funny like she was laughing at all the jokes stupid jokes i was making and i was like imagine if
00:59:32.240
i like just was like yeah take that fucking shit like i just started going crazy like insulting her
00:59:37.020
yeah and then one of our friends was like hey check your fucking phone and it's a picture of like
00:59:41.580
my nuts and i'm going like this when she looks up that's why i picture men proposing these kinds of
00:59:47.800
men yeah you're not far off yeah check your fucking phone bitch say yes you say yes or you're gay
00:59:55.340
okay this last one says or no these last two this one says i see a lot of beta males enjoying being
01:00:04.540
submissive to their ladies okay amen brother you god damn right yeah and they should this last one
01:00:15.040
says one stay single try to make millions instead you could definitely try that's for sure to get your
01:00:21.820
real estate license three get into investing god that's a whole lot of things to do what should
01:00:29.300
you start with maybe millions let's start with the millions that's yeah that's pretty and then i'll get
01:00:34.260
my real estate license yeah easy imagine you make all that money and then you're like now i have to go
01:00:39.140
get my real estate license yeah now's the time now's the time to sell local housing to people in the
01:00:44.740
greater la county area that comment was in response to like getting a girl yeah he's saying instead of
01:00:50.620
getting married like don't ever get married he's like i was like i'm never gonna get married but
01:00:54.180
if i did i wouldn't kneel and he says stay single and try to make millions instead get your real estate
01:00:59.720
license get into investing three simple steps three steps to success get mill acquire millions
01:01:06.600
get real estate license and then get into investing and then get into investing in that order yeah
01:01:14.280
those people always say investing is the last thing you should do with your money yeah later you
01:01:18.380
the later the later you start the better yeah you gotta invest way after everybody does yeah yeah
01:01:23.180
that's when you really start like i'm like this is not financial advice but i think once you get
01:01:28.520
into your 80s that's when you hit the stock market that's when you get you get into it that's when you
01:01:34.060
get into your you know your what's it called your 401k your you start a 401k you you know your s&p
01:01:41.640
ish is yeah whatever yeah sure i mean obviously i know all the things you're saying yeah obviously
01:01:48.660
i just like for them you know yeah you gotta explain it to all of them advice obviously i know
01:01:54.620
obviously i do yeah i think too with this like stay single try to make millions instead okay uh i think
01:02:02.920
if those three things you do those three things those three things could be known as the keys to the vip
01:02:06.940
what if those three are the keys those are the keys yeah they're hiding in plain sight damn we
01:02:14.480
could have been a vip this entire time and also what's the point of having like a bunch of money
01:02:19.440
if you don't have like a a nice person to share it share it with i know literally it's like truly
01:02:25.060
that simple you're just gonna sit on a pile of cash like scrooge mcduck yeah diving into coins
01:02:32.120
with no with no girl that's so weird he's not a fucking beta so obviously right he's not getting
01:02:39.960
on his knees or anything obviously but he will dive into a pool of gold coins yeah real men in an old
01:02:46.280
timey swimsuit yeah yeah what are those three little nephews called i forget donald duck had
01:02:51.920
three nephews they swam in the coins too yeah their names were like goofy braxton
01:02:59.600
and like robber yeah donald duck jr yeah donald duck jr i forget what are those names i don't know
01:03:06.480
huey dewey okay yeah i was pretty close we were super close we were in the neighborhood
01:03:11.780
okay so just to wrap things up now that we've talked about scrooge mcduck that's actually perfect
01:03:19.020
segue yeah to my closing statements okay um but what would you say is your best piece of advice
01:03:26.320
for people who are trying to get into stand-up or maybe they're pursuing it or maybe they're
01:03:29.820
actively and they're feeling a little stuck like what would you say is your best piece of advice
01:03:33.760
uh my best piece of advice for someone in stand-up or getting into it i think would be
01:03:45.200
um write jokes that you think like jokes that you would laugh at jokes that you don't you're not
01:03:54.880
trying to fucking be like oh i think people will like this yeah you go oh i think this is funny
01:04:00.300
because if you think it's funny and you're having fun with it and you're you're hyped on it then that
01:04:05.180
is contagious and it and it translates a lot better than it would be if you were trying to write for
01:04:09.480
someone yeah and and always yeah i just think just fucking having written stuff is good and really
01:04:17.600
trying to focus on the writing yeah more than the performance totally uh and yeah don't just do
01:04:23.280
fucking crowd work write a fucking joke if you're gonna do that just be fucking go on fucking tiktok
01:04:29.360
and do that shit that's what i do that's not like what stand-up is i think the same thing yeah it's
01:04:35.260
part of it it can be yeah i feel like you're so right though like a quality joke written like
01:04:40.480
it's so much better than yeah some fucking crowd work clip on tiktok which is all like
01:04:47.580
exists of stand-up which is crazy because that like that kind of mentality is why when they see
01:04:53.680
actual stand-up people like it's like young kids who don't know anything about stand-up they're like
01:04:58.140
oh there's no fucking crowd work right yeah that's not stand-up like that's literally not stand-up at
01:05:03.380
all yeah i know it's like it's frustrating but it's like i get it because it's a good way to
01:05:09.220
advertise it without burning material but it's like now it's like informing a wrong way to behave
01:05:16.980
at shows and people are like that's so true it's like yell shit yeah to try and like get in the
01:05:22.240
video yeah and then it's like no i'm actually i actually really wrote i really worked really hard
01:05:27.720
on this i really would like to say it but i need you to shut the hell up yeah so you get these jokes
01:05:31.480
off yeah i promise this is funnier than what you're saying i got paid to be here you paid to
01:05:36.940
be here let's all stay in our lanes right i think that's that's very true and i think you're right
01:05:42.340
the decorum at shows is like shifting rapidly because of shit like that which is annoying
01:05:46.980
yeah even at just like not even comic like comedy shows too i feel like just at like music shows too
01:05:52.500
yeah like the etiquette is fucking like non-existent now um but not to sound like a boomer but back in
01:06:01.440
my day you would shut up and you would watch the show and you would enjoy yourself yeah and you'd be
01:06:07.740
respectful to other people yeah yeah that's i think that's great advice honestly especially the writing
01:06:13.260
what you think is funny because i feel like especially with the access that social media has
01:06:18.760
given people yeah it's really easy to rip off bits and jokes from other people because you're
01:06:23.680
just like watching what's what's viral what's like oh this and even me referencing caleb this whole
01:06:29.400
episode but he's another comic i know but he was like saying that the the gift of virality has kind
01:06:34.900
of watered down a lot of comedy because it's like people are just reposting tweets or they're taking
01:06:39.500
like viral tweets and putting them in yeah and they're like oh this is my stand-up right yeah there's
01:06:44.000
no original thought because it's just being passed yeah it's just being like regurgitated
01:06:48.260
over and over again yeah in a million different fonts right which is why i think comics like you
01:06:52.860
like caleb chris fleming like just unbelievably funny just like a really unique perspective on
01:06:58.600
things oh wow so i really appreciate you coming on the show wow thanks yeah thanks for having me
01:07:02.600
you're welcome thanks for giving me the keys to the vip i appreciate it anytime thank you all so much
01:07:08.400
for joining us on this episode of the comment section show make sure i know all of you already know
01:07:12.300
who curtis is but make sure if you're not already go follow curtis everywhere where can everybody
01:07:15.920
find you uh yeah youtube just my name curtis connor um or kirk connor if you're looking for the
01:07:23.480
lizard if you want to be turning to a lizard hit my line that's my alter ego yeah that's your burner
01:07:28.360
yeah it's kirk connor kirk connor and you're going on tour or do you yeah yeah yeah sure guys
01:07:34.440
going on a world tour starting end of august only the first leg is announced so u.s dates but we're going
01:07:40.200
a lot more shows and a lot more cities and countries all over the world so yeah i'll see
01:07:44.980
you somewhere and if you go follow curtis you'll stay updated on all that stuff so just do that and
01:07:50.080
do that first then stay single and make millions then get your real estate license then go to
01:07:57.560
investing in that order major key major key major key alert thank you guys so much for joining us on
01:08:05.460
this episode thank you to my amazing guest curtis don't forget new episodes of the comment section
01:08:09.540
drop every wednesday you can stream audio on all streaming platforms but the video lists for free
01:08:13.280
and exclusively on spotify i like how you're still waving thank you i have to pee so bad i chug that
01:08:18.900
water like fucking crazy i'll get rough thank you again to curtis thank you all for watching i'll see