SWEATY GIRLS Ft. Owen Thiele | Episode 220
Episode Stats
Length
1 hour and 6 minutes
Harmful content
Misogyny
11
sentences flagged
Toxicity
139
sentences flagged
Hate speech
112
sentences flagged
Summary
This week, we're joined by the one and only Raven-Symona. She's a writer, podcaster, and all-around badass. We talk about her love of The Office, her relationship with self-esteem, and why she doesn't want to see Coachella.
Transcript
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I read fan fiction about other shows recently and I'm like, this is so hot and fun.
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I'm going to send you the one I read. I'm not even kidding. It was written so well.
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My boyfriend's reading this being like, oh God, this is so hot.
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Like, I'm scared. I'm getting hurt. And meanwhile, I'm sobbing.
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Yeah, you're like, just the complexities of the character.
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They know each other so well. That's why they're in bed together.
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hey everyone and welcome back to another episode of the comment section show sorry me your fave
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everybody knows me who cares about me on to the guest today we have another iconic all-star a
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returning episode the one the only oh and feel me cheering for myself that's narcissism you have to
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of course i do it in the mirror every morning yes have to you have to be excited to see yourself
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This episode of the comment section is presented to you by Barilla.
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You know those nights when you're deep in a reality TV binge and suddenly the snacks aren't cutting it?
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You need a proper meal, something that hits as hard as the most unhinged clapback.
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Albronzo by Barilla is crafted with textured ridges that actually hold on to sauce so every bite is rich with flavor.
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That moment you go back to swipe the clean plate, that's scarpetta, the art of savoring every last drop.
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al bronzo by barilla the pasta that does scarpetta look for the red bag sometimes i pass myself in
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the mirror and i'm like it's you i get so happy i know sometimes i'll be looking i'll be doing
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something or looking in the mirror and then my my man will be like what are you doing and i'm like
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i'm just looking at myself like how stunning i look hey wait come here you're gonna want to see
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this it's me i was like check it out i look gorgeous you do look gorgeous thank you so do
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you look no okay no i'm wearing a safari top i don't want to everyone's gonna come for me
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i'm wearing this top that i got at a thrift store it's gorge okay i thought it was like
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giving like burberry trench like up to the top you know that vibe but it's like not i think it's
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just giving like oh you escaped the jungle girl they're giving it's it's giving safari it really
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is giving safari my my boyfriend who's a stylist was like that is very on the nose he said that's
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When he says that to me, I'm like, my life's over.
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Y'all, I don't need to hear from the professional side of you.
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He styles me sometimes, and I don't know if we've talked about this,
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but I feel like I've told this story on your podcast,
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Maybe I'm Raven-Symona and I can see into the future.
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oh for so much money i was like wait you sleep next to me at night i'm like right isn't it all
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the same pot i pay you in vibes no the presence the joy of my presence and also like sex sorry
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sorry to say that but like come on like this is crazy you know what i mean you're all you're
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insane yeah you're nuts oh god well i will not be paying this no i'll see you in small claims court
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do you know you know in your email literally you know in your email when it's like you respond to
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this it's been three days yeah you know like yeah Steve three days ago respond to this I'm like no
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you said block sender yeah it's your man literally literally okay we were talking about this offline
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just now but how was Coachella I have a hot take I have oh please let's hear it I think everyone
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who goes to Coachella is not well right I think if you buy a ticket to Coachella me I think if
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buy a ticket to coachella you something's not i get it who doesn't want to see sabrina who doesn't
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want to see justin but it is so hot and it is so far everything is so spread apart oh girl it's so
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like planes trains and automobiles literally to get anywhere i'm like i'll see you there 40 days
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40 nights no i'm like well i'm missing justin justin comes it comes out at 11 55 p.m i i'm at
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the do lab at 8 p.m i'm like okay it's gonna take me four hours to get there let me start now i'm
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like it's too far i gotta start the trek literally i got it because you get stopped you you ultimately
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have to get a pretzel you have to get a lemonade i'm like it's like it's too hard you have to
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hydrate you have to get salt and straw it's like oh yeah literally too much going on it's like a
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marathon where like someone's handing you an orange slice it's like insane right so i don't
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know i'm all for coachella i love it i love the headliners this year i love seeing i loved everyone
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honestly i thought the performances were unbelievable killer they were unbelievable
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but i'm like i'm sorry my legs hurt yeah and i need a knee replacement yeah i'm like mama's old
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now gotta go home yeah i think and even the way because did you go artist i did go artist yeah
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me too and i've gone before whatever it is what it is but believe it or not it's it's it's maybe
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a hairline better well maybe totally totally totally i think the bathrooms are nicer yes i
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agree with that and i'm so lucky and there's signal back there too so that's kind of nice
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I think the bathrooms are nicer, which, by the way, that's great.
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But I do think that the trek is still just as, actually, if not longer.
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That's why I said, like, it is obviously a privilege to go that way.
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But really, it's like you're switching from the same vehicle.
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I love that you and I are sitting here complaining, being like, artist is crazy.
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yeah they're gonna clip me and call me an elitist no by the way by the way clip me and call me an
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elitist i'm sorry my legs hurt i can take no shit am i allowed to say that my leg well and also i
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will say i've gone to coachella at every other level too i've gone ga i've gone bip and then
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i've gone artist so like yes there is a clear hierarchy to them i'm just saying that the travel
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the dust and the weather hits everyone i agree there's no exception to that rule you can't escape
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at all i think honestly i had the most fun going ga t because you're everyone's feeling the same
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thing that's true in artists there still are actual artists performing there and you know
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they have a trailer that's so you're kind of like they're like oh my legs hurt i'm like go back to
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your trailer no for real yeah and also too i think like when you go when you go that way like
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obviously it's influencer olympics at every coachella totally but also like at that level
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especially there's like a whole nother culture backstage and stuff like the way people are
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acting is crazy i mean these people are crazy yeah one time this girl who i will i will believe
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who it was but it was she came up to us and asked me where the where the golf carts pick up and i
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go i actually don't work here so i'm not sure i'm not i'm actually not sure because i don't work
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here but she's like oh okay i was just curious if you knew i'm all you walked right up to me to ask
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She has a name tag, so I actually don't work here,
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And that was also the first year I ever went artist,
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I was trekking like everybody else in the beginning,
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like it's such a long line to even get a golf that's what i was gonna say like when you can
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get one it's awesome but like they do shut off at a certain time and so last year i got stranded
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at i don't even remember which tent i think it was sahara tent but like they were like oh yeah
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no more golf carts and i go i'm looking at them they're right there and they're like oh those are
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reserved for i don't know who and i was like okay so then we had to walk but like getting out was a
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nightmare i could not it felt like i was just walking the same loop a million times of course
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If you don't need to start walking for so long, you start feeling like you're going insane.
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And obviously we're all dressed like assholes because it's Coachella.
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And it was funny because as we were walking, we finally found the parking lot.
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We finally found our car and we could see it in the distance.
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my sister was behind us and then um our cousin adam and the rest of our party had made it already
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because we were at two different stages and so like we were walking and then we finally were
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like yes we found the car and then my sister was like did you have fun today to my cousin adam
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because that was his first time ever going and he was like yeah i did i had a lot of fun and then
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she goes what was your favorite part and then he goes bitch don't ask me that fucking question
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right now ask me in the car i can't answer this i can't answer this right now i asked me the
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fucking car by the way that's me all coachella i'm like hey i can't talk right now i i need to
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be in the car i need to be alone i need to be in the car i need to be in my bed i need to be quiet
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and i need to be alone literally literally we literally got in the car we all sat in silence
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for like probably 10 minutes because we were just like you literally have you're just like
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reevaluating everything you have to the amount of fights i get with the people closest to me
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when you get home when you get home from coachella it is like oh uh it's a war i'm like whoever's
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in front of me i will be calling you out for nothing for nothing you know what i mean you've
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done nothing to me and i'm like um okay let me list the things you've done to me yeah and you
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leave in such a good mood like you leave the house you're like yeah yeah you're drinking
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hand come back everybody's an op of course everybody's an op i'm angry and i'm dirty
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of course you hate everyone yeah and you reek and you absolutely reek and you reek to the point
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where you hate yourself no you're like that's me that's me do you know what i mean i didn't even
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know i could smell this way oh my god did you see people making videos saying people were stinking
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at coachella this year influencers specifically i said hmm the only reason i saw it was because
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someone tagged me and they were like because someone said who it was that stank really bad
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is it me no okay good i don't even know i didn't even know the name i honestly didn't even know
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the name i didn't recognize the person at all but i like uh in the comments someone had tagged me
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because i've talked about running into an influencer multiple times that smelled so
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fucking terribly and i'll tell you who it was tell me and we'll bleep it it's i don't know if you
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know him but it's that tracks a hundred percent wait i am obsessed with me the vision was clear
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all of a sudden i was like of course he smells do you know what i mean of course yeah and he has a
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girlfriend and isn't it interesting when people smell and they have a partner i go girl how the
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bed must reach that's why it's like till the room stinks but all clothes are still on that's
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fucked up you want to know something really interesting i would love my best smelling friend
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yeah that's what sounds weird that smells weird um my best smelling friend has a boyfriend who
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can't smell he was born without scent i go how'd you how did that happen you should have reeked
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right you know what i mean like if you smelled yeah it would be so amazing to have a boyfriend
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that doesn't smell yeah that would be like but she always smells delish oh man anyways keep going
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about your story basically i thought i i think someone tagged me in the tiktok because they
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thought they were like it was the same guy and i was like that's not him different white guy
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but crazy it's it's actually insane like when when you're at this level and i know i'm sure
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i'm sure he's making a fuck ton of money no yeah and i'm sure i'm sure and my that's my thing like
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my my sense of smell is not like super super awesome totally i have a very average sense of
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smell i would say so if i can smell you and it's like repelling me it's bad like if it's really
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fucking bad if i can smell you i'm the same way i don't think i can really smell things i don't
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think i can really see things i think a lot of like um my my sight my smell my my my taste i
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think they're all weak they're all very weak you know what my vision's bad too so we have that in
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common everything but like usually when your vision's bad you can really smell i'm like i
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kind of got fucked yeah like all my senses none of them are firing at 100 no like absolutely none
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of them 63 and i hate being touched so like touches off the questions look at us wait someone's
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gonna diagnose us wait what what is that what is that we need we need a diagnosis yeah i guess i
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guess i'm interested to hear what your guys's theories are i guess theories we don't want to
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call them diagnosis their theories what your theories as to what my diagnoses would right
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right right right i'm so curious to know but typically they diagnose me with autism but you
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know oh this is interesting yeah typically they diagnose me when i when i say what i believe to
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be fun quirky things about myself they'll diagnose they're like your neurodivergent yeah they're like
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well obviously that's because your neurodivergent i'm like i guess i love that i could be totally
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i have no idea yeah and i heard that test is expensive to get tested all these tests are
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expensive yeah and it's like it's it feels it's not the same i can't preface this enough it's not
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the same but it feels similar i have a dog that's deaf yeah and um i love thank you he's the best
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dog ever i honestly like he truly is like a crowd favorite everyone loves him and he gets along with
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everyone and every dog he's the sweetest but like i adopted him when i did adopt him his his previous
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owner like when i was fostering him he was like oh like he also might be deaf and i was like might
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be because that was not in the profile and then he was like well i haven't really gotten him checked
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because he's like i just know he used to live in a place where like on fourth of july there was like
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a ton of fireworks and he said he slept through the entire thing and he was like and it's really
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loud in my apartment so i just kind of assumed because there were certain times i would try to
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call him and he if he can't see me he doesn't react but he's like i took him to the vet and
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then the test itself is like four hundred dollars or something just just to test him and so the vet
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was like i mean it's really just a yes or a no so it's kind of just up to you if you really want to
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know but it's not affecting his quality of life at all so yeah it's kind of just up to you and
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that's how i feel about that test with autism because i'm like well it's up to you i it's
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really up to me like it's really but it's so expensive that i'm like i don't know about that
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i was adopted this reminds me i was adopted at birth and i feel like my my birth mom probably
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said something similar to my mom and was like something's not right but we're not sure what
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and i'm not too sure what it is we can't we can't tell you exactly what's wrong but something
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definitely as he grows something might evolve just want to give you a heads up the ears are
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not firing at 100 let's just say that okay let me let's talk about adults oh we need to talk
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about adults obviously smash hit so exciting it was it yeah um no i love it i love i love making
00:14:46.540
it yeah so fun yeah please tell me more about it like how's it going i know you guys we just shot
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season two how exciting oh my god so exciting wait that was mariah carey sometimes i do that
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i'm like i'm a singer do you know what i mean i'm like wait i love coach all of a sudden because
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i'm performing all of a sudden i've changed my perspective wait totally um it's so fun it's so
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interesting because we had a year off we were like okay when we shot the first season we get
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so close inseparable because we're playing best friends yeah and then you have a year off where
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it's kind of like who are you do you know what i mean and we see each other at events and we're
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like this is kind of awkward I don't know you but I love you like seeing an ex right right right or
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even seeing like like that best friend from elementary school who it's like so warm but
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it's ultimately like I don't think I know your name right you know what I mean what was it Kaylee
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you know what I mean and then now we're inseparable best friends again and I'm like oh my god these
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are my this is my family this is my home which we love which we love so now I can't live without
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them and I'm texting them every second of every day and I'm scared for it to end I'm like I don't
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want it to end yeah so i'm trying to to make it last as long as well you know what you guys got
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a season two so i feel pretty we got a season two i'm hoping we get a season three i'm scared
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every day well what are you excited for people to see any new developments or any evolutions
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obviously no spoilers but what are you excited for people to see well we left the last season
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with um a little drama between my character and paul baker jack and his character we we had kissed
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and there was some tension so I'm excited for that to progress if it does and I think it it
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will which isn't a spoiler it's just life when you kiss someone you guys there is evolution come on
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there has to be something that happens next um legally so I think something will happen next
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um I just think that's what will happen yeah and who knows how fun and then we have a little like
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If we don't get a season three, we're doing.
1.00
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The AO3 girls, you have to start mobilizing them.
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Not even, I mean, there's fan fiction about my character, which is so weird to read.
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Because I'm like, you really think he would do that?
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They have been forever, but they've really leveled up.
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I read this one between Draco Malfoy and Hermione.
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But I read, I'm going to send you the one I read.
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My boyfriend's reading this being like, oh God, this is so hot.
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Yeah, you're like, just the complexities of the character.
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they know each other so well that's why they're in bed together you know what I mean I'm like
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they understand each other's touch I love it I loved it it was so and I've read quite a bit of
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fan fiction as a fan former fangirl like back in the day so I think that's the one I I read like
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recently but they are killing I may pick all the best shows that's why I'm like I'm not surprised
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at all that adult oh my god adult stars also have fan fiction I feel like it informed I read it
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before I shot and I feel like it informed my character.
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I was like, they gave me some beautiful backstory.
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Yeah, we should really start looking here for inspo.
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I saw a thing recently on Impact, like the Instagram,
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But her biggest one was a heated rivalry run.
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we'll watch from the beginning yeah yeah yeah yeah it's so it's not just I mean people are like it's
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so hot I'm like no it's good storytelling it's also beautiful it's stunning it's very it's very
00:20:14.980
beautiful and touching like and not in a creepy way in a heartfelt way totally there's a lot of
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physical touching too but well of course yeah and that's also really great to see it's totally
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as a gay man but also I do love love love that the story and the storytelling and I think it's
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beautifully acted and I'm jealous and you got to be in the next season they have to put you in the
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next season I'm obsessed with me teasing something that I'm not in do you know what I mean well who
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knows I look directly into the camera who knows it's like I don't know I guess yeah it's called
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manifesting totally and this is the place you do it is there anything you're manifesting right now
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career-wise goal-wise anything last time I was here I feel like you manifested DJing am I wrong
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about this I did I did talk about DJing are you are you a DJ I'm still working on it okay I'm
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cooking you're cooking I'm studying let her cook yeah you gotta let me cook um what do I want
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okay this is not real because like career-wise like I want to keep acting and making things
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with my friends and let's make something like let's make I would love to you just tell me the
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time and place girl um but other than that I really this sounds crazy but I I need I need to
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be in nature and i need to love it okay and and i'm basically i'm forcing myself to love nature
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that's cool i think it's beautiful from afar and i'm like wow waterfalls how is that how does that
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happen like i'm like i can understand the concept but every time i'm like camping or or even hiking
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i get you i'm like oh where are the rattlesnakes i'm afraid instantly and i need to embrace it
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that's i think that's a beautiful goal so that's kind of my i'm manifesting
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loving a better relationship with nature there we go love that there we go like looking at these
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plants behind you i'm like beautiful then they're fake so better and that's why i said beautiful
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yeah exactly i'm joking what about goals wise like do you have any like shows you would love
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to be in do you have any movies i think he did rivalry should be on your board okay there we go
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has to be okay there we go the biggest one it has to be um i just did this movie called peaked
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that was um directed by molly gordon it'll come out sometime next year yeah and it was so much
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fun because it was everyone that i idolize it was gabby wendy who i have loved for so long it was uh
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uh molly gordon and emma mackie and connor story was in the movie and i was like this is
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dua lipa in the film i'm like what the hell am i doing am i doing sitting next to dua lipa
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it was just insane it was an insane cast and molly was directing it and she i've known her
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since she was two years old and and I was also two I acted like I was I was 40 like you're way
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older yeah I've known her since she was two um I was actually one um and and she just let us play
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and she like trusted her actors so much to love to bring the story to life which I feel like
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it's really rare yeah absolutely it's really really they I've been very lucky on overcompensating
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and adults all the creators are kind of like shine do you yeah have fun like they have there's a lot
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to trust there's so much trust and i feel like that doesn't happen um usually and so being on
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this film i'm kind of like oh i i want to keep making things with my friend i want to get all
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of us together and make a movie that's such i want britney i want you i want you know what i
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mean i just want like all the people that make me laugh that's such a beautiful idea i love that too
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do you know what i mean yeah i think so i think it also like it fosters such a beautiful environment
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when you guys totally especially when you personally love each other but also pass that
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like respect each other as creatives totally and the ability to like perform and like trust
00:23:56.720
on both sides I think that's a wonderful thing I think also having people who you idolize like
00:24:02.640
having Connor's story on this film where I was like oh my god I've watched your show so many
00:24:06.820
times and I think you're such a good actor like having him on the film acting against me I was
00:24:10.640
like oh I'm learning from like that's really what I want is to learn from someone I love to grow and
00:24:44.300
copy the hangover directly shot for shot yeah yeah i'm obsessed with that it's also like too
00:24:51.580
soon to remake the hangover which is so funny yeah i kind of obsessed with that we do like
00:24:55.880
how to train your dragon yes yes yes i love do i love the concept of like we have to remake the
00:25:01.380
devil wears prada too and it's like that hasn't even come out yet it's like i know but it'll be
00:25:05.020
a hit and then we'll just i know we're just getting ahead of it yeah like we're cheating
00:25:08.100
it a little bit let's let's just do that let's do that is there anyone that you would love to
00:25:11.540
work with like director or actor um that you would be like oh that would be a dream i know
00:25:16.540
you've worked with a lot of amazing people already no i i i'm i'm so in the in this comedy
00:25:23.120
world wait that sounded so narcissistic and tooting my own horn or my own horn um girl no it didn't
00:25:30.360
and you have a right to toot your own horn no i don't think i do i think people would agree i don't
00:25:35.040
But I think I've been very lucky that I've been so enmeshed in this comedy scene,
00:25:41.860
which is my favorite thing in the world and everything I've ever wanted.
00:25:45.080
But I also think I'm like, okay, let's do a drama.
00:26:04.440
different genre yeah different oh i love that horror would be tea horror even in an 824 horror
00:26:10.920
film that would be so sick also like maybe maybe it's a little funny yeah bodies bodies bodies
00:26:15.300
bodies bodies i was just about to say maybe it's a little it's like that tongue-in-cheek kind of
00:26:19.080
totally but it's horror but it's also like we're running you know what i want i want to run on
00:26:25.040
screen where i don't actually have to run where it's like you run to two seconds and they're like
00:26:29.560
cut like that's what i want yeah yeah i don't want coachella i want it to be like two second
00:26:34.380
sprint and then you're done yeah and it's on camera and people are like wow that was so amazing
00:26:39.060
you really ran i know you're you're doing the twilight run totally where they have the scene
00:26:43.120
moving really fast behind you as you're running in slow-mo that's exactly what oh my gosh something
00:26:47.420
fantasy like that would be really sick for you would you ever do that i think so depending on
00:26:52.400
what kind i feel like i'm in a real who want me phase in acting wait totally i'm in a real who
00:26:57.420
want me who need me that's kind of my vibes right now totally so that's where i'm at i'm i'm open
00:27:03.160
and available i feel like you're this is crazy you guys look at you you need to be on screen i'm
0.57
00:27:09.260
little caesar's hot and ready that's what i'm that's what i'm doing what the hell is happening
0.50
00:27:12.180
you need to be on screen you need your own show you honestly you should be the next raven simone
00:27:16.780
like you should have your own television show sitcom yeah you should have a sitcom oh my gosh
00:27:22.440
let's do a sitcom together okay I'm down you me and Kathy Griffin she's always on sitcoms wait
0.99
00:27:27.680
I have chills I have I've had chills so many times I love Kathy Griffin she is insane in the best
00:27:35.180
ways she's insane in the way I want to be yeah why not she's crazy I love it yeah I'm realizing now
00:27:40.860
as I'm as I'm saying that I'm realizing now that I was thinking of Reba I was not thinking of
00:27:45.100
Kathy Griffin by the way one in the same one in the same white redhead of course I love it I love
00:27:50.600
is there anything else that you're super interested is there any other like tv shows
00:27:54.940
you're obsessed with movies um i've been watching big mistakes which is jack in and in's other show
00:28:00.820
oh go off and it's so funny and it's so good dan levy created it with rachel senate um and
00:28:07.780
yeah i i that's kind of a it's a mystery there well isn't a mystery it's kind of like a heist
00:28:14.300
well is it a heist i don't know what it is it's there have you seen the show no no no i've never
00:28:19.620
seen it um I just wanted to promote it for them it's an ad I'm not walking out no it's amazing
00:28:24.520
it's it's it's it's really fun and it feels in a weird way it's like something that I
00:28:30.800
me jealous of Jack want to do I'm like why don't they cast me as the as the boyfriend of Taylor
00:28:36.100
thanks a lot um no it's really it's really great and it it feels it have you ever seen the show
00:28:41.020
search party no you would love this show you would love this you think it's so fun oh okay
00:28:48.720
They're on a hunt to find this missing woman that nobody knows.
00:28:53.100
So they're pretending to – basically they're like, we know her.
00:29:01.240
And they're trying to insert themselves in the narrative.
00:29:14.320
I think you would do so well in something like that.
1.00
00:29:16.840
let's let's do it all why not right fuck it wait oh wait really fast something just flashed into my
0.98
00:29:22.740
head that i have to just tell but it has nothing to do with this okay yeah okay i just have to
0.99
00:29:29.340
tell it on your pod i don't know why it's just i'm having an instinct okay i went to canal street
00:29:34.000
in new york i bought a fake chanel bag look at you 40 dollars he wanted 200 i i guess what
0.80
00:29:40.900
we got in a fight i got it down to 40 i'm sorry that's a good fucking deal 40 for a plastic bag
0.53
00:29:46.740
I think that's pretty good okay so I take it to Coachella I'm in the artist section
00:29:51.300
this artist I'm not telling you who I'll tell you yeah it's she's not an artist she's an influencer
00:29:59.280
ultimately bleep that yeah this this huge influencer comes up to me and is like
00:30:05.600
your back's so cute I've never seen that shape fake fake so then I get you guys knew who it was
1.00
00:30:14.440
was she was that library open bitch or what wait what does that mean she was trying to read you
0.73
00:30:20.860
down oh oh oh i was like what does that mean she was reading it was that a read so no i actually
0.97
00:30:28.120
think genuinely she was like how did he get the new bag i genuinely think she was like who the
00:30:33.680
hell is this how does he said oh mama santee alley wait literally literally so i got so nervous that
00:30:39.680
i couldn't tell her it was fake no of course not so i go oh my god the way i would lie
0.95
00:30:44.120
I go oh vintage it's so old oh and I would lie my ass I would I would tell the most colorful story
0.85
00:30:52.880
of how I found it in my mom's closet yes oh my god so I'm like I did that I'm like oh my god my
0.86
00:31:00.840
mom had it it was so old I was like literally so old she's like how old and I was like I would make
00:31:05.860
up a story and you're like I did I did she goes how old I'm like oh my god oh my god um and I'm
00:31:11.380
thinking like god i'm scared when did chanel come imagine i say before chanel like it started you
00:31:16.820
know i'm like 1922 she's like chanel started in 19th like that's funny because chanel wasn't
00:31:22.300
it wasn't around then so i was like i i i said 1991 which i feel like is like a normal year yeah
00:31:28.400
yeah you picked a good middle year normal year normal you know what i mean chanel had to be
00:31:31.940
around in 91 totally right i'm like heidi klum was around chanel was around you know what i mean
00:31:36.220
she was holding that bag on the runway i can see it now kate moss was with it you know right so i
00:31:40.900
said 1991 and she immediately took out her phone and she was like oh okay wait 1991 chanel she was
00:31:46.520
like oh my god okay wait where'd you get it i go poshmark and then i remember that i said my mom's
00:31:51.640
on top of you so that i was like it's on poshmark but it's from my mom's closet i was gonna sell it
00:31:56.220
on poshmark but there was already one on poshmark so i thought you know what i'm not gonna you you
00:31:59.480
know what you saved your own lie twice look at you but then she goes oh it's on poshmark that bag
00:32:04.980
you said what is this an interview what are you what are you questioning you who are you the
00:32:09.220
police meanwhile you change directions start attacking her literally literally i jump her
00:32:14.120
i run i just sprint i jump her um so at this point i just want to say i have no i'm not sweating at
00:32:21.080
all and i'm so proud of myself that i haven't sweat so far at coachella it's 98 degrees i'm
00:32:26.580
wearing kind of a a shirt that you would see sweat i'm wearing blue you would see sweat in this shirt
00:32:31.640
and we've talked about being sweaty girls i'm a sweaty girl i'm a sweaty girl me too i'm like oh
00:32:36.060
god i'm so proud of myself all of a sudden i'm like i feel pit stains yeah i'm like well the
0.93
00:32:41.420
pit stains are going down to my you turn you turn around back so i literally i'm like fuck i'm like
0.93
00:32:46.160
so not only am i lying i'm also drenched in sweat drenched so i'm like and it looks like i'm lying
0.98
00:32:52.080
and you're looking at her you're going is this hot in here yeah literally hot in here huh my god
00:32:56.780
oh man feels like the walls are closing down literally literally outside fully outside god
00:33:02.440
anyways basically it ended with her being like i can't find it i'm like i'll send you a link i'll
00:33:09.700
send you a link she's like oh you don't have my number so actually came out great so it worked
00:33:13.540
out it worked out you got it you got a great number yeah i have her number now obviously
00:33:17.400
can't ever use it or she's gonna ask for the link of the posh map bag that doesn't exist
00:33:22.000
she's gonna see you again and be like you never text me the link right right exactly now you have
00:33:26.240
to go look for a bag I'm like scared I have to buy her a Chanel bag what do you mean you say
00:33:33.140
she said a link I that's so true the other thing I could do is be like text her and be like oh my
00:33:39.240
god I'm so embarrassed my mom just told me it's fake that's actually a really great way to get
00:33:44.100
out of it and then I can buy her a fake bag but I don't think she wants a fake and I don't know
00:33:48.560
like would she I mean I don't know her but like would she find that funny or would she find that
00:33:54.000
ew you know what i'm saying i think she would laugh but i think she would be like
00:33:57.900
so you just sat there and wasted my time then yeah yeah yeah i had a million things to do
0.99
00:34:03.840
if you guys knew who it was like that story it's really crazy it's fucking it's really crazy
0.95
00:34:09.840
and i just kept lying lying lying lying i was lying and it's so funny because it's like
0.87
00:34:18.800
obviously who who wouldn't lie right but the other thing i could have done is i like to think that
00:34:26.380
i'm in i don't consider myself a comedian but i'm in the space of comedians i could have done like a
00:34:32.320
bit about it being i could have like ran with the fact that oh mama this is a dupe right exactly
00:34:37.360
like i could have just leaned into it but instead i was like no 1991 do you know what i mean naomi
00:34:49.540
and I think that would have been me doing a bit,
00:34:53.240
you have access to anything and everything.
0.99
00:35:13.140
And in her head, she's like, never seen that shape.
00:35:21.720
And honestly, from her especially, I would have done the same shit.
0.99
00:35:27.260
Or I would have hard left too and been like, oh, mama, this is a dupe.
00:35:42.480
instinct wasn't like run from it yeah same that's what i would feel to you that's what i said at a
00:35:47.960
certain point you're like what are you the police right if i see her again i'm gonna be like oh my
00:35:51.400
god the signal at coachella i sent you a link and now now it's now it's gone now it's gone now it's
00:35:56.820
sold i tried to look it up and sold it sold the bag and getting her number is honestly a huge win
00:36:01.280
t period i'm i my my fear and i've done this before oh my god why am i full of stories today
0.98
00:36:08.960
i took oh god i took an uh i was wearing assless chaps in the last season of adults love full ass
00:36:17.020
out okay you guys are wondering you want to see it okay you should go check it out yeah go to
0.81
00:36:21.760
episode four episode four ass out um and you guys love it um okay anyways i was in assless chaps i
0.97
00:36:28.500
was obviously taking so many photos that day yeah of my ass obviously i'm sorry i i've never taken
0.97
00:36:33.920
so many photos on that set i'm like face i don't care ass out yeah gotta take photos yeah and it's
0.98
00:36:39.940
sitting pretty too and they're like oh and put a robe on i'm like no no crew wants to see yeah
0.84
00:36:43.860
you're like oh no i'm good i don't need unless you guys need them on yeah yeah i do not i'm on
00:36:48.700
the loudspeaker i'm like does crew care if i'm naked you don't great does anyone have any
00:36:53.040
compliments they want to give me let me know here i have a box for compliments if you just want to
00:36:57.520
slip them so it's anonymous i don't want to make you guys uncomfortable it's anonymous the box um
00:37:01.740
anyways i was fully ass out and i was taking a lot of pictures and my friend had uh lucy who's
0.51
00:37:10.520
on the show with me she plays billy in the show she has owen wilson's number because she uh did
0.99
00:37:16.680
a play with him oh wow okay and i sent i took some photos of my ass on her on her phone i took my
0.98
00:37:23.480
phone was dead so obviously i needed to keep going what what my phone's dead so i'm gonna stop taking
0.99
00:37:27.460
photos no i asked for someone else i'm gonna find someone else yeah so i take her phone go to the
00:37:32.440
bathroom take some nudes um send them to myself i'm so happy and then she looks at her phone and
00:37:37.840
i hear the loudest scream i've ever heard and i sent them to owen wilson all my nudes oh because
00:37:43.100
you were trying to send her tears so i didn't realize sorry i'm oh we in her phone and i guess
00:37:50.360
owen is owen i'm like oh it just said owen yeah so i'm like what other owens do you know okay
00:37:55.620
Wilson okay Wilson but I didn't know you knew Owen Wilson I'll tell you what if I put Owen Wilson in
00:38:00.940
my phone I'm definitely putting Wilson so in case anyone looks I'm like yeah that's him if you can
00:38:05.340
believe it exactly so then Lucy and I get in a huge fight because I'm like how close do you
00:38:08.900
how close are you to Owen Wilson that you can call him Owen you and him are not on a first
00:38:15.700
I'm sorry Owen that's crazy she's like a common mistake right she's like no we're so close you
00:38:22.080
and me Owen that your name is Owee and his name is Owen I'm like no no no he is a firsty lasty you
00:38:28.100
need to call him Owen Wilson I'm sorry that's not my mistake you're all that is user error
00:38:32.960
unfortunately and also he's probably thrilled that he has those and honestly he's the luckiest
00:38:36.920
boy alive if we're being honest he is so happy he hasn't responded because he's in the bathroom
0.59
00:38:42.320
jerking off he's jerking it and that's on him totally that's out of our hands sorry at least
00:38:49.040
they were good pics exactly by the way weird pics yeah weird weird pics because i was trying
00:38:55.240
to take it in the mirror it was it was an angle that no one's seen yeah no one and you're all
00:38:59.920
and i kind of nobody wanted to take any more pictures of my butt right so i had to do it
00:39:02.860
myself i had to improvise exactly so anyways all to say to circle back to this number that i have
0.88
00:39:07.140
now in my phone of this very famous influencer i am so scared that i'm for some reason gonna
00:39:12.580
send her a nude one day yeah maybe make sure you put her last name in there oh it's so you never
1.00
00:39:18.100
oh it's in there bitch it's in there and the company is like do not do not send nudes you
0.99
00:39:23.180
know yeah it's like isn't it so when you get the number of someone like that doesn't it feel weird
0.99
00:39:29.720
because you're like this person has a phone totally this person has a phone number i could
00:39:33.960
ruin their life right now if my phone was stolen which by the way i think i'm not even kidding
00:39:38.860
that's why i always like now especially because i have so many people in my phone i literally i
0.91
00:39:43.600
like that shit is super glued to my hand all the time because i am also fearful of that and that's
0.78
00:39:49.760
another reason why i haven't actually gotten a new phone yet because i'm like i don't i hate
0.98
00:39:54.120
switching phones it makes it makes me go insane same same it literally the rage it gives me i
00:39:58.580
describe as feeling very republican the rage feels so republican 100 and conservative 100
00:40:03.540
and it's like it bubbles up yeah and it's like it takes over me like a demon and so i haven't
00:40:10.100
switched my phone because i and then one of my friends is like oh you know you could go to the
0.80
00:40:13.340
store and they can do it for you i was like i am not fucking doing that like no one is taking my
0.84
00:40:18.620
phone somewhere i can't see like i was like there i god help the people in my phone like that's what
0.88
00:40:24.620
i was like i actually got i'll say right here i got his number well of course but i got that
0.95
00:40:31.560
because i posted a bullshit ass tiktok and she dm'd me on tiktok and said i because i because
0.98
00:40:38.180
the tiktok was me telling my my two friends who are gay men and they're married it's just
0.99
00:40:43.360
necessary context i wrote on the video i was like um i have random tea that is so
1.00
00:40:48.980
fucking stupid but every single time i tell a gay person this tea their mind is fucking blown
0.99
00:40:54.840
and it's like the most pointless tea ever it means nothing to anyone except gay people i would love
1.00
00:41:00.760
it yeah and i will tell you thank you and actually we can confer stories because you know the person
0.75
00:41:05.000
it's about and i would love to that we're gonna do off off camera for real but i i posted that
00:41:10.240
and she dm'd me my own video and was like i need to know the secret and then i messaged her back
00:41:16.820
and i was like mama text me because it is not safe for these dms and so then she i'm thinking
0.91
00:41:22.560
nothing of it and then she did text me like 10 minutes later and she was like hi it's so and so
1.00
00:41:27.680
and i was like this is crazy did you tell her the tea yeah yeah i tried to but she actually didn't
00:41:32.940
know a key part of it so like she hadn't seen this person has been in something and you have
00:41:38.420
to watch that something in order to understand the tea if that makes sense totally so i was like
00:41:42.920
have you seen this and then she's like no yeah she said no i haven't fuck and then i was like okay
0.78
00:41:47.960
study up and come back and then she was like i will so there you go wait but now now i have her
0.83
00:41:55.000
number and i just don't know what to do with it in that phone isn't it crazy that like we're holding
00:41:58.560
this it's like no no and the key to everything the key to everyone i can't even imagine who the
0.94
00:42:04.720
fuck's in yours no i don't even have that many numbers but i don't even i'm just so bad with my
0.90
00:42:09.600
phone i'm constantly losing me shopping me and aritzia you should see it i'm leaving my phone
0.99
00:42:14.300
here my bags they're like i'm like like you live there oh they're like sure these are all your
00:42:19.020
literally literally i'm like and where are the pillows sorry i just want to take a quick nap
0.57
00:42:23.760
i'm like it's it's shit everywhere yeah i remember leaving aritzia in the pants that i bought there
0.67
00:42:29.560
i bought sweatpants and i left my jeans in the dressing room and i was like i'll come back for
0.92
00:42:33.520
them i'm like it's like literally my home see ya it's my home i'm like i'll be back renee i'll be
00:42:38.060
back like literally i just know everyone that's a beautiful thing i love it you have more important
00:42:41.660
things on the on the mind well i'm just i just don't even care about yeah you're just so not
00:42:45.720
attached to it i'm like who cares but then again now i'm like oh i need like a chain now i have to
00:42:51.180
care oh now i need a chain yeah you need one of those leashes so it's like on you at all points
00:42:56.240
my mom has that thing that goes around your neck that's it for your phone for your phone and i
0.59
00:43:01.260
think i thought it was so embarrassing for so long and i was always like oh no god help her
00:43:05.940
and now i texted her the other day and i was like the leash should i get one i'm thinking i need one
00:43:13.440
too get me one you might have been on to something with that yeah also chic i mean i think we should
00:43:19.600
i think we should bring it back we should bring it back yeah even though it was never in no for
00:43:23.140
real we should definitely we should bring it just generally my mom actually used to have something
00:43:27.680
similar to that where she when i was a kid i used to be like oh why would you bring that but it's
00:43:31.940
like a purse hook so like it's basically something that goes on the ends of tables and then you can
00:43:36.920
hang your purse genius yeah isn't that so when i was a kid i used to be like why would you bring
00:43:41.340
that that's so embarrassing and then now as an adult i'm like what a genius invention the amount
00:43:46.960
of times i need a hook to put and i don't want to put my bag on the ground wait do you know what
00:43:50.640
i just got what a hook for the car it's exactly like that oh my gosh but it goes on the back of
00:43:55.760
the seat but then to be honest i always forget my bag in the car because i always leave and then
00:44:01.440
i'm like oh god because it's hanging on that really convenient literally i'm like that is
00:44:05.400
too convenient i'm forgetting it um it's so smart though no it is you're just like my fiance because
00:44:11.880
he leaves stuff anywhere and he has he is like it's almost like it's buddhist in a way where
00:44:18.160
it's like these earthly possessions mean nothing to me like he he really will just walk like when
00:44:22.560
he first started dating me he it was often and consistent that sometimes he would get out of the
00:44:28.620
car and the car would be off but everything would be in the car phone wallet keys me amelie me
00:44:35.820
every time you don't understand when i park my car i walk inside to a i'll come out the next day
00:44:43.120
and i'll be like my car's unlocked with everything in it my phone my wallet my every like everything
00:44:49.380
no literally the amount of times like sometimes he one time i found keys in the ignition the car
00:44:54.360
was not on but he just like turned it out it's almost like he just gets out and starts walking
00:44:58.160
you don't have any of your things do you park does he park on the street no at the time no
00:45:33.120
I and no one ever did that's so nice there's a halo over my car he had that too like I was like
00:45:38.920
you are like divinely protected totally the way like so many bad things could have happened and
00:45:44.400
haven't totally and he he's so like ah it's all right like and I can't relate and I know you're
00:45:50.900
like that too yeah that is so tea I I envy that like so sincerely it comes from my dad calls me
00:45:57.500
I coach my dad goes to Coachella every year we used to go together it started when I was like
00:46:02.600
13 and now that I'm older yeah I'm not 13 anymore how crazy um now that I'm older my dad goes with
00:46:08.660
his friends and I go with mine and then we like meet up oh how fun anyways he calls me one night
00:46:12.480
after Sabrina and he was like freaking out and I was like oh god what's what's happening yeah and
00:46:19.440
he's like I lost my car keys in the festival I'm like what he's like yeah they must have fallen
00:46:26.020
out I'm not sure where they went and I was like okay we can retrace these where have you been
0.99
00:46:30.580
he's like everywhere he's like oh mama i was i did 20k steps literally yeah i'm like well fuck
0.98
00:46:37.780
so then me and him i just schlep across the whole fucking festival i try to find this shit by the
0.98
00:46:42.380
way we found it no fucking way we found it in the back of goby who knew everything's in the back
0.96
00:46:49.000
and you know it's funny it's like it's it's similar to one of my friends from college too
0.72
00:46:52.740
where she she was exactly like this also but it was one of those where like you have simultaneously
00:46:58.160
the best and also worse luck totally like you will lose your important documents but you'll
00:47:04.380
find them untouched and nothing stolen totally it's so strange exactly that's why like it's such
00:47:09.280
a divine protection to me that is exactly you're pure of heart that's why i was in toronto and you
00:47:15.500
have to obviously have a passport passport to get into toronto yeah i was in toronto i had my
00:47:19.760
passport everything was fine the day i land i walk through um customs i have my passport i show them
00:47:25.420
all is good I I get into my apartment for the first time shooting adults yeah I'm like where's
00:47:30.200
my password I can't find it for the entire three month three months that I was there I couldn't
00:47:33.920
find my password the day I was leaving I was freaking out obviously I couldn't find my password
00:47:37.700
I'm like there it is I found it I'm like but I literally could but I could not my my ID was
00:47:44.140
expired so I couldn't go to bars yeah like the whole time I was there I was stuck I was stuck
0.89
00:47:47.940
inside of my fucking apartment and then of course the day I'm leaving I'm like well there's my
0.93
00:47:51.760
password i'm like should we go to a bar now you like literally my friend in college i always joke
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00:47:56.800
that like i would have never done anything fun without her which is who you are and she would
00:48:02.060
have died without me wait so people like you need friends like me and vice versa a hundred percent
00:48:08.260
like that's why because i'm a virgo so that's why i that is so stressful to me and it's funny you
00:48:13.460
say that too because when i went to canada last year with my sister and my my team because we did
00:48:17.800
a live show at jfl in uh vancouver oh my god the like i want to say like the day before we left
00:48:24.760
my fiance goes we'd been there for like four or five days so the day before we left we had an
00:48:29.820
early morning flight he's like do you have my debit card i never touch his debit card so i go
00:48:35.600
no i don't why and he goes i don't know where it's at and i go like at all or he goes
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00:48:43.700
no but it's all right i'll just cancel it not a big deal and i was like are you fucking getting
0.85
00:48:49.700
me and he's like no i have my passport and stuff like because he well actually it wasn't just a
0.77
00:48:53.720
day at first he asked me about debit card but then he found out he lost his entire wallet
00:48:56.820
i was like including your id i'm shaking he goes yes but i have my passport so it's fine
00:49:03.240
and i was like oh my god oh my god oh my god and i was like you're not stressed out at all he's
00:49:08.180
like no i mean like i can cancel the cards and like i mean i'm bummed about the wallet loved
00:49:12.440
that thing but you know I'm dead he's just so like yeah you know well that is literally me I
00:49:18.180
have gotten into the car at LAX okay driven home and then been like oh my god I didn't take my
0.80
00:49:24.660
check luggage it's still on the fucking conveyor belt I've done that without your suitcase I left
00:49:30.860
without my suitcase I was like woo you know it's so great to travel late like in the car I'm like
0.97
00:49:35.740
you did not literally the guy's like how was your trip I'm like oh my god I was there for months
00:49:39.920
meanwhile I'm like he's like thinking like this man's a sociopath you have to check I literally
00:49:44.880
I just was like I was home I was like well gotta put my feet up it's hard traveling and then I'm
0.99
00:49:50.520
like oh with those suitcases fuck I'm like what the fuck it's horrible and then of course you're
0.99
00:49:58.320
freaking out that it gets stolen like yeah it's a disaster imagine my boyfriend yeah there's like
1.00
00:50:03.840
probably about 10 minutes where he he ever shows stress totally and then it's all acceptance after
00:50:09.840
that that's it's all acceptance and solutions after that it's all like well it is what it is
00:50:15.420
like and i that energy i yearn for but also probably really annoys you yeah yeah because
00:50:22.880
of how i am as a person it is stressful to me but it's also really good growth practice for me
00:50:28.200
because there is something really beautiful in that like being so disconnected from stuff like
00:50:33.900
that because i have a control issue so that's why i'm like that stuff never happens to me because i
00:50:38.240
need the control totally but you people like you people like my man are very like what happens
00:50:43.900
will happen and what happens happens it's really funny and it's a beautiful thing it is yeah i i'm
00:50:49.960
i did this thing the uh last year was it last year or beginning of this year called girl room
00:50:55.220
it was like a tiktok show where we go into girls rooms and it's they're so messy and we have to
00:50:59.760
organize them and i was the host of it and it was so much fun and then i was realizing
0.99
00:51:04.880
every I am that girl so I was like why am I the host of this I am girl do you know what I mean
00:51:12.440
and I was like there's clips of me talking with my friend Emma in one of her vlogs and it's me
00:51:19.000
being like let's normalize clutter and then I'm like wait says the host of girl room I'm like
00:51:24.400
this is a disaster it's hilarious if anything it's funny at that point it's even more funny
0.77
00:51:29.920
it's funny even um last year i turned when i turned 30 um my family my friends and family
00:51:35.320
like got like a house in like palm springs and we went out there for a few days because like
00:51:38.620
what i wanted for my 30th birthday more than anything was to do nothing at all wait i was
00:51:42.380
like i want to like i want to swim i want to tan i want to eat and i want to sleep like that's what
00:51:46.960
i want to do and not look at your phone and not be bothered about work and just yeah it's the best
00:51:50.880
i was like i want to unplug entirely and like go relax and it was the best and the last day we were
00:51:57.220
there like full day um there was like a volleyball court in the backyard like there was like a pool
00:52:02.420
and there was like a big lawn and then there was a volleyball court on there and my family and i
00:52:07.160
love volleyball so we were all playing and my my man was like running to go like get one of the
00:52:14.440
passes or whatever and there's like you know those ropes that like stake into the ground of course
00:52:19.860
to hold the net he literally runs into it almost decapitates himself like literally it like he hit
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00:52:26.680
that shit so hard there was like a huge like line but i got him this necklace from david yerman
0.97
00:52:33.040
and there's two two chains on it both of them are our signs and it's his favorite necklace
0.99
00:52:37.180
so literally it he hit that shit so hard it ripped the chain both charms flew off into the grass and
0.99
00:52:46.640
then we made sure he was okay first and then he was like my fucking necklace like it's like and
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00:52:51.260
the grass was high it was like this high and so we had the idea to get a metal detector so then
0.98
00:52:57.340
my cousin and my mom went to the store bought a metal detector came back we fucking found them
0.69
00:53:02.620
if you can fucking believe it we found them like there was no way when i tell you the charms are
0.97
00:53:07.920
like this fucking big it's also so funny because you buying a metal detector i feel like that's
0.97
00:53:14.380
like the first thing like what it like if i were checking you out and you were buying a metal
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00:53:18.660
I'd be like what the hell are you doing yeah follow that person yeah yeah someone follow that
00:53:22.940
person yeah what is the what the hell that's so yeah and they sell they sell them at like Lowe's
00:53:28.080
so I like I found one online and we went and got it because I was like I was really sad about the
00:53:32.860
necklace too my man was so sad and I'm and I'll be honest I'm trying not to be mad even though
00:53:37.240
it wasn't his fault I was trying not to be mad because of course that happens to him is your
00:53:41.780
neck okay your necklace that's gone how do you feel about that yeah and the necklace yeah how's
00:53:46.840
that and i and it was purely because like of course that happens to him yeah like of course
00:53:52.760
it does that's why i said on the last day we had a couple more hours of sun of course trying to
00:53:57.520
have fun of course of course and then we are so type b it's so sad we're like type f yeah that's
00:54:04.720
like so sad so type b it's so like well but he wasn't like that about the necklace he was actually
00:54:09.920
really sad about it and we were trying to find it and then um i think my brother actually found it
00:54:14.700
Like, my brother was using the metal detector, and he was like, I found it.
00:54:20.800
I mean, it's a breath of fresh—but you know what's so funny?
00:54:23.300
When I find something that I lose, I'm always like, oh, my God, I knew I'd find it.
00:54:29.560
It's been four days and 900 hours of sweat and tears.
00:54:39.800
And now for a very special segment called Whose Mother, brought to you by Sephora, the only place you need to shop this year for Mother's Day.
00:54:51.480
So today we're going to explore different mother figure values like being strong, aspirational, and amazing.
00:55:00.660
So we're talking about moments that are giving mother.
00:55:03.800
Do you have any recent moments in your life that were giving mother to you?
00:55:09.280
this is good this is good you can think about coachella maybe there was some performances you
00:55:13.240
saw that were giving mother oh god well sabrina was giving mother she was oh my god you know what's
00:55:19.520
so crazy i watched sabrina in person yeah and then it was unbelievable and then i went home
00:55:24.760
and watched the live stream and i was like oh my god and it holds up on a little phone hell yeah
00:55:30.440
i'm like this is insane um what else is giving mother i what else is giving mother to me i will
00:55:38.880
say Slater is giving mother totally love Slater giving mother to me I listened to her song crank
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00:55:45.340
I listened to it on like a fucking loop at the gym the other day I felt like I could run through a
00:55:49.360
wall I was like I can accomplish anything I put my mind to I love those songs and Slater's music
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00:55:55.140
does this to you where where you like pick up a weight and you're like I fucking got this
00:55:58.880
and it's so heavy you're like well maybe not but it's real soundtrack yeah it's making you believe
0.85
00:56:04.600
you could do anything that's so yeah so i'd say anything and everything slater right now is giving
00:56:08.960
mother to me i love that i love that look at us also sabrina and i saw you post about your sabrina
00:56:14.540
and your man on the cover of that magazine how this is honestly that covers mother it is that
00:56:20.300
cover is giving mother my boyfriend snatched pony i'm like oh my god it's so it's like it's pulling
00:56:25.580
his face back in a way that i've never seen i'm like this is you got a facelift whoever you're
00:56:29.340
buying for make sure y'all check out sephora for your mother's day gifts because a beauty gift
00:56:35.760
from sephora lets mom know that she is both loved and cherished and with the mother's day gift sets
00:56:43.080
sephora has made that even easier shop mother's day gifts at sephora a memory i have of you and
00:56:49.840
i when i was on your podcast was when we were trying to theorize ways to tell your man about
00:56:55.500
when he does propose to you with the ring yeah it can't be that boo fast ugly one when we were
00:57:01.300
like theorizing like how can we do this how how of course that's such a core memory of that by the
00:57:06.680
way with you and me as well and me as well because that was a scary time in my life when i thought he
00:57:10.620
was giving me the ugliest ring possible and meanwhile it was just in his styling kit for
00:57:15.160
for one of his girls and i hope i hope one of his girls looked at the ring and said that's but
00:57:20.980
that's but i'm not putting yeah tell him tell him yeah yeah yeah yeah okay i do have some fun facts
00:57:27.540
about you and i'd love to give you some okay this one says you once fled a hit and run as the victim
00:57:34.140
someone hit your car but left because you left because you were late for a nail appointment
00:57:39.460
yeah that's true and what about it yes so i uh-huh so i got in a really bad car accident
00:57:48.340
not my fault yeah their fault they really hit me it was they hit me from the back which is always
00:57:54.040
their fault who knew even though i probably stopped but it was still their fault according
00:57:58.420
to the law right it was still their fault and it was really bad my bumper came off it was a disaster
00:58:03.420
and um yeah i i had to go to my nail appointment i had to make it don't know what else there is
00:58:10.140
and they were like trying to find their insurance and i looked at them and i said
00:58:12.900
we'll figure this out I said well this this will all so you'll call me yeah people call my people
00:58:18.720
they were like I don't know how to find I was like it's all good girl I got in the car I zoomed
00:58:22.100
I got I had to go I had to see Yuka I gotta go I have things to do I gotta go totally I was
00:58:28.900
already late by the way and I've been I I'm the kind of person that's already late I've done this
00:58:33.640
once where you're 15 minutes late and they're like don't do it again but we'll take you do
00:58:38.080
know what i mean and i can't do it again then yes i'm you're so me that is where we are a lot alike
00:58:43.200
too because i am working on my lateness i'm always late i always tell people i'm like well this is
00:58:48.560
like maybe people of color understand it better totally because like when you tell your friends
00:58:53.080
like okay let's say you're throwing a barbecue and you're inviting your friends you tell them 12
00:58:56.600
you expect everyone to show up at 2 totally like i'm shooting early like 12 and then they'll show
00:59:00.900
up at 2 and then when they show up at 12 you're like you're here early no no no if they showed
00:59:04.700
up if i invite someone at seven for dinner and they're not there at nine i'm the food's not ready
00:59:09.860
so sit on the couch love there's a lot on the couch i'll turn on the tv for you i'll turn on
00:59:15.320
cartoons i'll turn on the roku for you literally literally what do you like little einsteins like
00:59:20.620
what do you want no no two hours i know like sometimes i'd be like i my very first actual
00:59:25.940
valentine's day that i spent with my man he was like i was still working nine to five so i didn't
00:59:31.480
get off until i think i got off a little bit early at like 4 30 and then i had to drive home i had to
00:59:36.220
get ready and then he made dinner reservations and he was like um i made a reservation for this time
00:59:41.740
you know what i mean just be ready by this time whatever i'm like okay and then i was i was a
00:59:45.580
little late which he already knew i was late and it was kind of far away and so we were driving i
00:59:50.580
was like i'm so sorry i'm late i'm so sorry i'm late because it's new you know what i mean so
00:59:54.020
he's not used to it yet so i'm like i'm so sorry i'm so sorry and then he was like honestly it's
00:59:57.920
okay i thought maybe you might be late so i made two reservations at two different restaurants so
01:00:02.880
since we're not making this one it's okay because the second one's actually better and had a deposit
0.96
01:00:06.860
so i'm actually glad we're making that one instead and i was like that's my fucking man that's that's
0.96
01:00:13.120
when you know you're you're marrying him yeah that's what i'm saying you know you're marrying
0.96
01:00:17.320
him meanwhile before a ring mama yeah totally before a ring this is in the beginning yes this
01:00:23.460
is beautiful first valentine's day ever it was a beautiful thing okay i have more fun facts about
01:00:27.540
this next one says there is a hidden video on the internet of owen and molly gordon singing
01:00:32.000
a cover of the jackson fives i want you back from 2013
01:00:35.580
and you know who wrote that in i don't think so i really don't think so
01:00:44.580
that's so weird that somebody's posing as me i have so many fans
0.99
01:00:49.600
it's ai the ai dupes are getting out of control you guys this ai is shit god i didn't say that
0.97
01:00:57.520
and I didn't sing that either um yeah there is that I was in a band with Molly Gordon
0.99
01:01:01.740
Molly Gordon and I had a band love it was it was called Lewis and June my middle name and hers
01:01:08.280
okay genius wait that's actually so cute you guys are so onto that Coachella yeah
01:01:13.120
wait that's tea um and we recorded all a lot of covers and we um and we loved our covers
01:01:23.960
was it just the two of you and a man named taylor mackle taylor mackle went on to produce lizzie
0.97
01:01:29.140
mcalpine taylor mackle is killing it is taylor mackle found his fucking stride
0.96
01:01:34.880
you're all and he forgot all about literally literally i i'm like texting taylor mackle to
0.97
01:01:39.980
get me tickets into lizzie mcalpine i'm like hey i'll sit in the back i don't care i love lizzie
0.62
01:01:44.620
she's the best she is so fucking talented yeah she's the best and so sweet yeah okay well i'm
01:01:53.440
When you have, like, your, like, induction into Hall of Fame
01:01:58.100
When you have something like that, then they play something like that.
01:01:59.240
I don't think I'll ever have that, but if I do and that video plays,
01:02:01.940
I'll be like, you don't have to put the star down.
01:02:06.040
When you and Molly Gordon go on to win an Oscar together.
01:02:10.260
That's, like, Michael B. Jordan and Ryan Coogler.
01:02:17.000
And I have chills mostly because if that video is anywhere involved, again, it's all good.
01:02:27.440
It says that you are a massive Brandy fan and one year in elementary school dressed as Brandy's Cinderella for Halloween.
01:02:35.400
I mean, that's, I'm not embarrassed by it because that's, yeah.
01:02:38.820
I loved her version of Cinderella was my favorite version.
01:02:46.320
so fucking her and whitney houston in a room together singing impossible i have i i'm hard
0.99
01:02:52.680
i'm hard this is i have a huge boner i have a huge boner you guys it's crazy what's going on
0.99
01:02:59.060
that's why i have to cross my leg it's crazy yeah i'm obsessed that is so honestly you have been
0.98
01:03:05.660
that girl for a very long time it would seem you said fucking drag totally and you know what's
0.91
01:03:10.600
funny is every time i got a chance to dress up i would dress as a boy so there is something in
0.99
01:03:15.220
that i think you and i were separated at birth this is special you and i this is special i'll
01:03:19.860
lose my car keys you'll find them you'll dress as a boy and i'll just as a girl look at us this is
01:03:23.980
really special okay if it never works out we could do lavender marriage fine i'm down yeah
0.99
01:03:27.560
fuck it we've heard it here first i'm fucking down i'll do in a few years by the way
0.99
01:03:31.380
okay last one fact uh it says that your great grandmother used to tell you it's extremely bad
1.00
01:03:39.880
luck to wear hats in bed wait that's so true she would yes about you wait wait wait she i'm not
01:03:46.400
allowed to put a hat on the bed like when i'm packing and you like okay everyone's gonna think
01:03:50.100
i'm gross because i put my suitcase on the bed when i'm packing i know it's disgusting it's
0.63
01:03:52.980
disgusting and gross and ew where's that suitcase man it's been on my bed it's on my bed and i put
0.78
01:03:59.760
a hat on the bed it's something in me is like oh my god oh my god oh my god you're not you're not
0.96
01:04:04.100
that is so interesting and now that you told me i'm probably going to abide by that do it that's
01:04:09.860
So I believe, especially when like older women tell you, I'm like, you know something.
0.98
01:04:17.020
And by the way, I feel like it's worked in my favor.
01:04:20.440
Ever since I haven't put a hat on the bed, I haven't, I was going to say I haven't lost
01:04:28.080
No, but you haven't experienced that kind of bad luck.
01:04:39.580
i trust your great-grandmother i do too i do too ultimately well thank you so much for coming oh my
01:04:44.400
god i want to come back every day i know such a light oh my god you're a light you're the funniest
01:04:48.600
person thank you that's literally if i had comedy idols you'd be one of them katherine o'hara and
01:04:54.460
you and that's my truth wow big shoes that's my i love her sorry well i have to just in a moment
01:05:00.320
of seriness for a sec i really do think you are so incredible and i think you're so special and
01:05:05.760
i'm so glad that you are on the rise that you're on right now and it's so deserved and it's gonna
0.78
01:05:11.780
be amazing i literally think everyone is so lucky to have you you're a fucking thank you so much
0.90
01:05:16.200
unless finds out that i lied to her believe that believe that unless that and then in that case my
0.97
01:05:22.960
career is in the well you know what i have your back thank you i'll back your lie thank you so
01:05:27.640
yeah thank you i'll back what meanwhile just telling everyone that i lied yeah she sees this
0.75