The Comment Section with Drew Afualo - June 24, 2026


WE'RE DADA Ft. Hannah Berner | Episode 227


Episode Stats


Length

1 hour and 18 minutes

Words per minute

215.62

Word count

16,962

Sentence count

36

Harmful content

Misogyny

43

sentences flagged

Toxicity

267

sentences flagged

Hate speech

220

sentences flagged


Summary

Summaries generated with gmurro/bart-large-finetuned-filtered-spotify-podcast-summ .

Transcript

Transcript generated with Whisper (turbo).
Misogyny classifications generated with MilaNLProc/bert-base-uncased-ear-misogyny .
Toxicity classifications generated with s-nlp/roberta_toxicity_classifier .
Hate speech classifications generated with facebook/roberta-hate-speech-dynabench-r4-target .
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00:00:33.620 ugly people cheat too yeah if you can believe ugly people suck i would argue 0.99
00:00:41.460 ugly men cheat a lot more cheat a lot more i've also said that yeah i've also really good looking 1.00
00:00:47.300 men have seen enough tits they're tired by 35 they're like i've seen them all i'm good i just 0.98
00:00:52.560 want a cigarette and to relax hey everyone and welcome back to another episode of the 0.96
00:01:04.240 comment section show sorry me your fave everybody knows me who cares about me
00:01:07.580 on to the guest today we have the iconic the hilarious the legendary hannah burner
00:01:12.980 oh my god i'm so happy to be here thank you for having me oh my god i'm so happy to have you
00:01:19.580 we've literally met for three seconds we have but we were saying and we've already kissed at least
00:01:24.840 twice before the cameras came on with their base we were lighting it up it was crazy i'll climb you
00:01:30.380 like a tree you won't have to climb that far you're tall too yeah i'm five seven yeah no i'm
00:01:35.540 saying in my friend group i'm the tall one you and me both i put girls in my pockets right i carry
00:01:40.540 their baggage for them yeah i'm dada and you're dada i'm daddy yeah like when we go out same no
00:01:46.840 my bestie page i'm her boyfriend i'm her man i'm her man you're her man i'm her man but no i'm so
00:01:53.660 excited to be here you um i feel like we both are men's like sleep paralysis demons in different
00:02:00.520 ways yeah we're sandwiching them for real so like i just artist to artist i just want to say
00:02:05.460 i love your work lover of the game to lover of the game
00:02:08.500 all his life and people express it in different ways but i appreciate your hard work out there
00:02:16.760 likewise honestly likewise i think honestly i think that's why we feel spiritually connected
00:02:22.060 yeah i think that's we've we've literally never spent time with each other no but it feels like
00:02:26.860 we have also you're close with teffy yes i'm close with teffy so when you text teffy i feel
00:02:31.620 like you texted me is that a thing where you're like no we just recently exchanged numbers so
00:02:38.940 now we're for real yeah now when i text hefi i will text you for real i'm i love a group chat
00:02:44.180 throwing a little a little emoji a little a little gif i love a little group chat too oh yeah i've 0.94
00:02:49.740 been naming group chats a lot lately i feel like this business is nothing but fucking emails and 0.86
00:02:54.280 group chats like that's all i'm in two billion group chats but i do have to say like we talk 0.91
00:02:58.800 stand-up comedy you talk about great tiktoks yeah a good timed gif in a group chat like
00:03:04.720 that's legendary right when everyone's reacting to yours when you're killing yeah and you know
00:03:10.940 and you know also when you have to be like i gotta say this right now or someone else is
00:03:14.660 gonna get ahead of it and we'll lose the moment also when you change the group title oh without
00:03:20.320 like warning people and it hits girl like i stay doing that too changing the names yeah i did that
00:03:26.780 once when we were we were in ireland and um yes what a trip when we had left we were like uh well
00:03:34.900 like half of us had left already some of us were still staying and so we were out in a group chat
00:03:39.080 it was me my sister caleb and britney and so we were all texting in there and like just like super
00:03:45.260 gushy stuff like i love you guys like the universe brings friends into your life that you just you
00:03:50.220 know you're getting real emotion yeah and so you're like sending these in insanely heartfelt
00:03:54.620 messages to each other and we're like yeah yeah yeah and my sister responded a little bit later
00:03:58.960 when we had already kind of started moving away from that and started being funny but she was we
00:04:03.280 were still in the moment so we were still reacting and stuff but then it was just poorly timed my
00:04:07.080 sister sent like a really heartfelt text and like right above it at the same time I had changed the
00:04:13.080 group name to something super awful and terrible and I can't say only because it won't make sense
00:04:17.920 to you and I don't want to have to explain the joke but it was just like Caleb's screenshot he
00:04:21.840 is like no perfect timing drew but that's also i'm glad you changed the name that's the range
00:04:26.040 of a friend group i love having like the darkest talk like before i go on stage sometimes in my
00:04:31.600 opener i'll be like so then like when did you feel like it was that moment in your life that
00:04:37.160 you were like do we are we gonna make it and then i'm like go have fun out there
00:04:40.420 i'm not doing small chat yeah but there's small chat i'm like so in high school like was the 0.97
00:04:46.780 bullying like how intense is oh shit you gotta go on stage go be funny bye they're like hey you're
00:04:51.100 in five by the way honestly okay that's a perfect transition because we want to talk about the new 0.99
00:04:55.620 special how exciting oh my god thank you oh my god second special thank you period look at you
00:05:00.900 well look cranking them out after the first special they were like okay you're gonna do 0.90
00:05:04.120 second special i'm like that's such a like don't be like don't be stupid it seems selfish it seems 0.99
00:05:10.600 like too much like in this age of capital i'm like how much shit do we need you need a whole 0.95
00:05:15.700 another and it's also not like coming up with a new song that's like three minutes it's like a 0.97
00:05:19.640 whole new fucking hour yeah um i do think with stand-up i love being in a male-dominated space 0.74
00:05:26.700 and i love taking up space too and i love how people will be like oh like men like women talk 0.96
00:05:34.420 too much and it's like men have espn like we all are talking a lot your podcast is short compared 0.97
00:05:40.980 to male podcast right i'm telling you and at least it's entertaining shit i've never heard a man talk 0.73
00:05:45.720 for 45 minutes straight and been intrigued i do to say the last per minute on your pod like should 0.66
00:05:50.000 be studied yeah 100 let me see the data on that right someone online figure that out get on it
00:05:55.600 the scientists get on it the women in stem get on that and women specifically or gay in stem
00:06:00.280 people why don't people say gay and stem are gay guys you guys are in stem i'm not sure i don't 0.98
00:06:05.420 know you should ask let us know if you're gay and in stem let us know i don't want any like 0.81
00:06:09.400 male surgeons who aren't gay like doing work on your body or your face no why would you 0.95
00:06:16.200 because that's how i feel about um male uh gynecologists well what's the matter with you 0.99
00:06:20.640 that should be illegal what's the matter with you yeah also like so you're a pervert that means 0.98
00:06:25.160 you're a doctor pervert you had a choice you decided to be a pervert like you're not even 0.98
00:06:29.240 hiding you're supposed to go to get a phd in perv you know what they're doing they're almost 1.00
00:06:32.540 that's what phd stands for perv 0.98
00:06:37.360 but you know what they'll do they'll be like you'll be like you're a pervert for that and 0.99
00:06:43.520 they're like you're a pervert for thinking i'm a pervert for that like they try to turn on like 0.97
00:06:46.780 what are we a russian doll here we are perv perv perv on perv i know i've never had it and i'll do 0.99
00:06:53.200 a male masseuse right i'll go to second base i don't care but i'm no yeah absolutely not and i 0.98
00:07:01.520 know gay guys are not become gay guys are not becoming gynecologists because that's gross yeah 0.99
00:07:06.320 straight men are being fucking weird they're being weird that's why i said you're being perv 0.99
00:07:11.020 i know it and that's why i know it to be true that's why we've barely any research in it because 0.99
00:07:14.960 they don't work they're just poking around okay so back to the special now that we've gone over
00:07:23.160 dr perv back to the special okay so i would love to know like how you felt going into the special
00:07:28.840 after having done your first one how did you feel going in my first special i was so nervous my
00:07:33.140 first special i full-on had like a out of body like every anxiety panic attack i always say like
00:07:39.960 when you're trying to get to that next level in your life the universe will be like we're not
00:07:46.060 letting you get there until you actually face those demons that you thought you overcame yeah
00:07:50.820 so it was scary because like performing a film stand-up set you gotta nail that yeah and it 0.94
00:07:58.820 was like shit talk about one and done because i love a live moment yeah energy the vibes oopsie 0.92
00:08:04.500 poopsie i messed up ha ha ha silly silly yeah but live it's like a lot of pressure and i was a 0.95
00:08:10.160 tennis player and i dealt with like a lot of pressure in my past i know and it's all you 1.00
00:08:15.020 like when you fuck up you go home and you have to look in the mirror and be like you're a fucking 1.00
00:08:18.280 loser and you're all god it's my team and it's you yeah team you just blame the the girl next 1.00
00:08:23.620 to you you're like maybe you should have tried harder next time you're a team of one you're 1.00
00:08:26.760 i'm a team of one it's me fighting with myself and i've been like when the fuck did you do that 0.99
00:08:31.580 and hannah was a for real tennis player period i love an athletic bitch period oh my god thank you 0.96
00:08:37.280 and also i know people make fun of me for like talking about tennis which i do talk about a lot 0.93
00:08:42.120 but it's like what i did and what i know and if i was a dude who played basketball they'd be like
00:08:46.280 former basketball player he played in high school i don't know if you know this but i did play
00:08:50.180 basketball at one point in my life so but i am also that girl who's who will talk about like an 0.93
00:08:54.880 injury i had in college like a fuck boy on a date but maybe that's my feminism like right 0.91
00:09:00.380 going up to men and making them hear about my college tennis career yes it's like taylor swift 0.99
00:09:06.140 playing guitar for travis kelsey every night like that's that's what i've actually i love that shit 0.93
00:09:11.900 you're gentrifying their space yes you're taking up their time girls need to start just playing 0.95
00:09:16.200 bad guitar at night i feel like this is the podcast where we could start those types of
00:09:21.980 movements right yeah start being annoying in any way really the way that they are like i was like
00:09:26.800 they are extremely annoying learn many ways turn it on them um you have to reverse it
00:09:33.600 so when you were building the hour for this new special yeah like how did how did you find that
00:09:39.600 to be like a little bit easier did it feel like less pressure this time when you were building
00:09:43.620 the hour at first i panicked because what's annoying about stand-up is when you it airs
00:09:49.540 it's called like it's burned so that means i always to do a sports analogy it's like it's
00:09:55.880 like winning the super bowl you got your netflix special and then you have to start learning how
00:10:00.980 to play football again yeah so then you go to the club with no material and you're like
00:10:05.320 our kinkles funny like you start from scratch and i was like how am i gonna do a whole nother
00:10:12.160 hour of jokes but then you remember you weren't funny because of that specific wording of that
00:10:17.500 specific joke right at the end of the day it was like your creative brain and who you are
00:10:21.620 so this hour i actually feel like i obviously improved as a stand-up but i was like 0.99
00:10:26.980 sillier more myself that's so nice you know like when you're with a friend group you fuck with you 0.96
00:10:31.720 start being like loosey or goosey or you're like i'm gonna go for a risk on this one and then it 0.95
00:10:36.100 works you're like ah yeah i can't restart and there's no that's like the warmness that i want
00:10:41.560 to bring to my specials where you're just like everyone feels comfortable yeah i think that's
00:10:46.740 that's really cool too and i think it speaks to like you saying like you're becoming more
00:10:50.860 confident too and your ability to be a stand-up and like move as one that's fucking awesome that
00:10:55.740 you felt more confident oh my god thank you i also feel like stand-up has certain ways that
00:11:00.540 you're like supposed to go about it and i think if i had gone the very old school way as a woman
00:11:06.380 like i wouldn't have made it here yeah and i think that the internet and tiktok and group chats is 1.00
00:11:13.720 like where the girls are shining for a lot of i always talk about it but there'd be more women 1.00
00:11:19.000 in stand-up if when you went to a drunken bar at 9 p.m in the bronx yeah and no one laughed a lot 1.00
00:11:27.240 of hilarious women are like maybe this isn't for me no for real that's if you're honestly like just 1.00
00:11:32.940 not a straight white man and you go into those spaces something happens and you go maybe i should 1.00
00:11:38.240 go into accounting like that's what happened and i think because they like refuse to laugh
00:11:43.440 even if it is funny yeah and it's from big things to little things that happen to you
00:11:47.680 so i feel like i'm excited for this new wave of comics based off of the internet i mean
00:11:53.120 memes are the girls and the gays that's true i mean we are working creating it everything funny
00:11:58.580 and interesting has always been created by marginalized people it's never i've never in 0.93
00:12:03.240 my life seen something created by a straight white man and been like that's fucking awesome
00:12:06.940 i have never in my life felt that way well because trauma right like if you haven't had trauma you're 0.91
00:12:12.840 not funny you're not interesting you're not you're not i don't want to hear from someone who doesn't
00:12:17.820 hasn't faced like really hard times and they overcame it by finding the light in the darkness 0.84
00:12:23.060 which is like corny as fuck but like but it's true it's so true yeah and but that's why it's 0.94
00:12:27.740 crazy like netflix like why are there no like why aren't there multiple gay guys yeah and gay girls 0.98
00:12:33.600 on netflix for real and i always say that the gay girls paved the way for me yeah because they 0.99
00:12:39.760 don't give a fuck what men think no for real so they walk in the room and they're not like 1.00
00:12:43.520 you know do i look cute enough did he look at me weird they don't give a fuck they're just doing 1.00
00:12:47.860 their art yeah they're just they're focusing on what they love which is being funny and that's 1.00
00:12:52.400 why i think so many lesbians like yeah they paved the way for the straight girls hell yeah
00:12:57.020 absolutely even though i am lesbian passing right you and me both
00:13:00.940 in that sense yeah because we could throw a ball yeah well yeah i think it's i i also think it's
00:13:08.180 just like the me giving dada but that's also just like i think i'm extremely straight looking and 0.94
00:13:13.960 and and generally like energy but i think it's also just because i'm so fucking mean to men i 0.96
00:13:18.900 was gonna say and that is so exclusive to lesbians you don't look scared yeah you don't and you're 0.90
00:13:23.040 not afraid of a man not liking you no never and that's power i'm kind of hoping for it oh if a man 0.76
00:13:29.460 likes you talk to yourself about that check on that let's revisit that if a man gets good vibes
00:13:34.400 from you if he's like there's something i liked about her no yeah you want to give up something
00:13:39.980 like no she made me uncomfortable that's or if you like make a video and it's only men agreeing
00:13:44.260 with you you're like oh my god i'm on the wrong side of history oh no i've made a terrible terrible
00:13:48.040 choice i've had some female comics be like how do you have only female fans and i'm like
00:13:53.880 because that's who i'm talking to for real the men the men know that it's not a welcome
00:13:59.980 they're probably not going to enjoy it that much over here and which like is how it should be
00:14:05.080 yeah and i think the boyfriends have started to come to the shows which that's good is it's a
00:14:11.300 problem it's not what i anticipated it's not the energy i want but i do like building tension in
00:14:16.480 the room to like call each other everyone out right and it's funny because i also think it's 0.84
00:14:21.700 important like i want the men to listen though because i have shit to say that i'm sliding in 0.83
00:14:25.780 that is like important i yeah if you're gonna be here take notes and be quiet yes i always say my 0.97
00:14:31.260 stand-up the guys that showed up this is probably the longest they've ever listened to a woman talk
00:14:37.380 without interrupting right and sometimes they'll still try oh my god whenever any a man even laughs
00:14:45.100 too loud i'm like who's who's chaperoning him like so you're talking over women no let one
00:14:49.080 so you're gonna talk over me let one was like we're five minutes in and you're already giving 0.50
00:14:52.120 your opinion also like no one cares that you thought it was funny let women laugh yeah i don't 0.99
00:14:56.740 care that you thought it was funny no yeah i'm giving performative like women like shut the 1.00
00:15:01.240 fuck up that wasn't even a real laugh i can fucking tell you would die because at the end of 1.00
00:15:06.800 my show i would your your crowd work with men would be because you're doing crowd work but 1.00
00:15:11.320 just alone with yourself yeah that's what that's what you're coming for them and you're like i got
00:15:17.040 the mic and you're not saying right exactly so at the end of every show it was almost like research
00:15:21.640 i asked men if they ever thought about what sex feels like for a woman right let's just start
00:15:28.940 with that the answer is crazy like that was a setup question they literally be like no and i'm
00:15:36.160 Like, that was literally a setup question.
00:15:37.980 How do I teach men empathy on this theater show in one minute?
00:15:42.660 We don't have the time. 0.85
00:15:43.580 And then I'd say, can you think of an adjective, which is a describing word for what sex feels like for a woman? 1.00
00:15:51.580 The answers I got. 1.00
00:15:53.920 It's like they've never walked this earth before.
00:15:57.280 For real, they woke up yesterday.
00:15:58.740 One guy said warm.
00:16:00.680 Warm?
00:16:01.900 Oh, geez.
00:16:02.680 Yeah, from sweating on top of me.
00:16:04.040 You're right.
00:16:04.580 And I'm like, no, no, no.
00:16:05.300 we're warm yeah you're not we're warm you feel warm you're once again you're thinking about you 0.99
00:16:10.160 yes i've never been cold and been like if i had a dick in me i'd be warm right now yeah sorry mom 0.99
00:16:14.340 and god i'm freezing i wish someone was here i wish i had penetration no if any no 0.98
00:16:20.820 one one other guy said stabbing i had to stop the show 0.90
00:16:24.740 right okay no yeah all right well stabbing call the cops on him they do all the like 0.94
00:16:29.420 you know exciting and i'm like yeah i've never finished sex and been like 0.64
00:16:33.100 exciting that was so exciting on my special some guy said teamwork i said there's teamwork that's
00:16:39.940 not even a descriptive word so like that's not an adjective i've lost more faith in the male
00:16:47.940 species since like doing i've been in the rooms drew i'm talking to the specimens yeah you're
00:16:53.720 getting ground like ground floor yes yeah boots on the ground and it's not looking good and then
00:16:59.320 i'm looking at their girlfriend i'm like this conversation in the car going home is going to
00:17:02.400 be a journey hey hopefully you guys fight on the way home yeah hopefully you work some stuff out
00:17:06.660 because i'm just speaking truths up here i'm not doing crowd work actually i'm just nosy on stage
00:17:12.360 actually right you have to be you have a curious mind that's important thank you you're like look
00:17:17.360 at me i'm multitasking i'm entertaining and i'm also researching yeah and i also can sense like
00:17:22.060 when a guy is gonna have a really bad answer yeah it's those little when you do it so much like just
00:17:26.640 the length of his sleeve even like you know it's like a little too long
00:17:31.000 for a little too many wrinkles a little too a weird earring that it's like we're in minnesota
00:17:38.600 what's going on like little new a facial hair that's just not right yeah it's a little off 0.99
00:17:44.820 and i could how they're sitting i'm like he's scared yeah i could smell fear you would fucking 0.86
00:17:50.400 oh my god well you've done live shows i've done live shows yeah i've done i've done stand-up 0.97
00:17:54.860 twice well a couple yeah twice and then I've done like live comedy like with my sister when we go
00:18:00.080 on tour and do podcasts which is I mean obviously like you I'm sure very few men I do an opening
00:18:05.660 bit though every time we perform where I'm like is there anyone here um that has no idea who the 0.60
00:18:11.280 fuck we are and came as a plus one almost always they're men and so always big man nice shocker
00:18:16.460 but I'm like okay well I hope you guys enjoy the show um you know have a good time laugh and if 1.00
00:18:22.020 you don't i have your money so i actually don't give a fuck i don't fucking care either way i 0.97
00:18:27.840 don't care and that's feminism yeah there you go yeah making it listen to you which reminds me i 1.00
00:18:32.460 love asking female comics like um if you've ever been given notes on your sets like that's like 0.85
00:18:37.540 one of my favorite questions to ask because it's always all the time and it's funny from an athlete
00:18:42.060 perspective it's like being a tennis player and a guy like watching you hit and trying to give you 0.98
00:18:46.320 notes and i'm like i'll literally whoop your ass you know what stand right there and i'm gonna hit
00:18:50.380 the ball as hard as I can how about that yeah I actually first kind of wanted to be a sports 0.97
00:18:54.180 broadcaster me too really yeah I did wait me and you welcome back to Diego wait I'm obsessed with
00:18:59.960 us we should take that gig that they gave Snoop Dogg and Kevin Hart but they should give it to us
00:19:03.940 oh my god so we can commentate sports that's literally my dream oh my god okay me manifesting
00:19:08.580 wait manifesting I'm in LA so suddenly I'm like wait I'm obsessed with that because
00:19:15.160 yeah I want to be a sports broadcaster and I come from like a basketball family and I love
00:19:19.600 interviewing people so i nicks fan are you excited about them my dad cried last night
00:19:24.700 my dad hasn't shed a tear since 1999 he was crying on the phone it's that running joke that like if
00:19:31.020 they win or lose everyone get out stay out of new york if you're not from there my dad whether they
00:19:35.480 win or lose disown me to smell jaylen brunson like but it's i come from like my grandpa was
00:19:42.240 a basketball coach in brooklyn very cool and um he was one of those literally guys that they make
00:19:48.780 they talk about in movies where he'd see like a tall guy on the street and be like you're making
00:19:52.620 it to college you're coming to high school like crazy like just insane brooklyn in the 70s if you
00:19:58.580 can imagine yeah so then in college i was like i went to wisconsin playing tennis and i had to do
00:20:03.560 a gig my last year and i was like are you guys badgers the badgers yeah and it was a little
00:20:09.940 culture shock for me but yeah we learned we grew we had a lot of cheese i learned i need lactate
00:20:16.260 lactate um yeah which you love yes i do i feel i'm very familiar with lactate that's what we
00:20:21.560 dm about if you're wondering what's under the surface that's true let me look at the camera
00:20:26.400 for that so anyway i yeah at wisconsin i started doing interviews and the men would come up to me
00:20:34.040 before i had to go on camera and be like do you know what a double double is and i had to look
00:20:39.940 at like first of all do you think i like accidentally fell in this and i and i'm just
00:20:44.500 lying my way through like yes like do you think that i'm just a girl who was giving a microphone 0.51
00:20:50.640 i don't know what i'm doing why am i here and i remember getting fucking angry yeah and the like 0.63
00:20:56.240 the constant just like little the assumptions that i don't know anything yeah and then i i had 0.73
00:21:03.060 to move to like a small town to start if i wanted to do sports broadcasting and i was i was like i
00:21:08.840 want to go back to new york city and ended up cold calling blah blah blah long story short it was
00:21:13.940 because i felt like it was so sexist that i kind of was like i'm not in the mood for this right and
00:21:18.720 then i found myself in stand-up comedy but i feel like that was when i was like stronger and ready
00:21:22.520 to right totally i just love disrupting male spaces and that's like what i was put on this 0.59
00:21:27.040 earth for you're telling me bitch so anyway that's why i love you but i feel like we do it in um
00:21:34.260 in a way that's so tasteful yeah and it's also really authentic to us and it's weird i didn't 0.88
00:21:40.660 know i didn't know that you started doing interviews and stuff in college which is so
00:21:44.180 interesting because that's what i did too like so i grew up an athlete so i play i played soccer my
00:21:48.420 whole life so that was my main sport but i tore my acl my in high in high school and so then i
00:21:53.440 literally frat guys right now i was gonna go if it wasn't for my knee but i i really when i tore
00:22:01.100 everything in my knee i for real thought to myself okay this isn't forever so what do i want to do
00:22:04.820 instead and i and i started thinking about what i wanted to do so i wanted to work in sports and i
00:22:09.140 was like i want to do broadcasting literally on my um resume like my my reels and all that stuff
00:22:14.860 i wrote that i wanted to be the next bob costas because i'm i came from a football family yeah
00:22:19.080 so everybody loved football my dad loves when he had a pink guy during the olympics do you remember
00:22:22.880 that yes that's like the one thing i remember about bob cost and the whole time he had the 0.89
00:22:27.160 biggest pink guy you know cbs or whoever the fuck was like right this is happening yeah he's getting 0.94
00:22:33.120 paid like 400 million dollars get the hell out there but also only a man only a man could show 1.00
00:22:37.720 up with a full pussing pink eye and be this close to the camera pussy pink eye imagine 0.99
00:22:44.480 they would have put us in an eye patch and he said you're gross nobody wants to see it but 0.98
00:22:51.760 everyone was like bob causes his experience okay looks like he's seen stuff anyway i interrupted
00:22:57.040 you but i i experienced you wanted to be bob yeah i experienced the same thing in interviewing
00:23:01.740 interviewing in college um talking to athletes like especially how uh interviewing them was also
00:23:08.020 painful um i don't know if this is shocking to hear but a lot of them are not very eloquent
00:23:13.500 well cte is a real thing it's very and i did i i joke i did cte charity all through college for
00:23:21.900 free i dated these men i talked to these men i did their homework i right i helped them you and me
00:23:26.520 both i told them what a major was i literally i helped them like get from place to place right
00:23:31.740 literally i i and i remember one time i was interviewing someone um and he told me which
00:23:37.280 i mean i did end up dating this person but that is neither here nor there um he he literally told
00:23:42.300 me like in an interview while i was interviewing him he's like you know normally i get asked to do
00:23:46.840 interviews because i'm i'm one of the smartest guys on the team and i'm like oh word yeah for
00:23:51.420 sure as i'm like interviewing him and then through i wish to this day i could remember what it was
00:23:55.700 but he made up a word and it was one of those words it was like oh what's the one where he's
00:24:00.640 a visionary yeah so it's one of those like conversated like you know like conversated
00:24:04.480 is not a word it was something like that yeah and he made up a word like right after he said 0.94
00:24:09.360 that to me and i was like yeah okay i'll fuck around with you for a couple more months and 0.82
00:24:14.120 then you know that's the thing then i'm done you're like okay there's four more months left 0.97
00:24:17.960 that my i swear to god my dude texted me the word isn't and he spelled it i s i n t it is okay and
00:24:28.140 i was like i have to speak up for women like this is bigger than me and i he was he literally i
00:24:32.580 responded he was like i'm tired from practice and i was like you don't add a letter when you're 0.99
00:24:36.920 tired that's crazy that's not what that's called but he was stupid he was getting concussed like 0.98
00:24:40.900 he would see like colors but he couldn't tell the coach because then they take him out and he 1.00
00:24:45.640 couldn't go pro whatever so i'm just watching his brain just shriveling up but he that was a large
00:24:50.660 man that was a tall man he would throw me around i was like i'll stay with you i'll keep going and
00:24:55.500 you know what all right i'll see it through you know every now and then feeling dainty
00:25:00.340 i've always been drawn to larger men so i was a jersey chaser if you will in college but i would
00:25:09.620 argue you're not a jersey chaser if you are an athlete that's true fam i mean yeah we're just
00:25:14.440 running parallel yes at that point we're pacing just trying to have a division one child yeah you
00:25:19.940 talk about that right that's true dude if i've pitched that to caleb because i don't want kids
00:25:23.880 personally but i've told caleb i was like i mean obviously i don't want to ever be pregnant but
00:25:28.140 like if you put if my egg mixed with his sperm in my body olympian d1 olympian and he was like
00:25:35.780 well now i'm gonna have to consider because he loves football which i was like you know what
00:25:41.360 and look listen but it's true if i was a large man in college and i saw you
00:25:45.980 start humping your leg i'd be like nike sponsorship date out of the womb but also 1.00
00:25:53.760 your poor pussy like right that baby would be fucking huge yeah no way that's why even my my 1.00
00:25:59.580 man like now is like he's six four so he's a big dude and like like we he was like a 11 or 12 pound 1.00
00:26:06.660 baby and i was like a i was a nine pound almost 10 pound baby i feel like that's a good good i
00:26:12.520 should talk about that more often like how much did you weigh when you came out of the room is
00:26:15.540 that a lot like yeah they're like let's not talk about baby's bodies let's not shaming that's not 0.98
00:26:21.620 i go you were nine oh interesting yeah i know i was a big ass fucking baby and my brother was 0.94
00:26:27.440 born after who was the last baby my mom had he was almost 11 pounds because my dad's a huge dude so 0.98
00:26:32.820 it's like holy shit yeah it's not in the stars for me worked out that i don't want kids because 0.99
00:26:37.100 holy fuck you know what i mean oh jesus christ can't do it yeah you don't have to pee it would 1.00
00:26:42.180 just fall out yeah drink water it'd go right through you right for real just douche right 1.00
00:26:48.000 out my fucking pussy no vaginas are very powerful and they adapt that is that's true literally 1.00
00:26:53.860 well that's why i don't understand what men call women loose because i'm like so a girl who's 1.00
00:26:58.640 getting hooking up with her boyfriend do you hook up with your boyfriend a girl who's having 0.97
00:27:02.520 sex with her boyfriend every single day for three years right is tighter than a girl who has sex with 0.97
00:27:07.840 a different guy every month because she's single the math is a math he's like you don't get it i'm 1.00
00:27:12.500 dr pervert you don't understand i went to school for this shit okay so listen to me how's that 0.99
00:27:17.160 dummy the footage of a gynecologist like teaching room just full of a bunch of dudes like talking 1.00
00:27:25.720 and they and they all still don't know what a clit is crazy just skip the yeah i was like you 0.98
00:27:29.740 studied the whole inside huh didn't figure out the outside nice well what's the worst piece of 0.61
00:27:35.580 advice you've ever been given on a on like jokes or like one of the most memorable times oh yeah
00:27:39.380 guys giving me notes and stuff yeah i actually have a joke that made it on my hulu special
00:27:43.780 where i i joke about like i'm a reality tv6 i'm a stand-up comedy 17 and like i have a bit
00:27:50.200 i joke about how um stand-up comedians are kind of like serial killers that we don't have to be
00:27:55.500 that good looking to be considered ridiculously good looking and i make fun of like our ted
00:27:59.400 bunnies not that hot and like whatever and i was working on that joke and a guy pulled me aside he
00:28:04.180 was like you know it's kind of hack to like to do like oh i'm a do you keep hearing podcast ads
00:28:13.060 like this one for example but always wonder how you actually get involved with them for your own
00:28:18.100 brand or organization well it's easier than you think we're a cast and we give you the platform
00:28:23.900 to do it all yourself browse thousands of popular podcasts choose the shows that match your perfect
00:28:30.040 audience set your budget and launch and if you want a hand our podcast specialists are there to
00:28:35.900 help you launch with confidence this is podcast advertising without barriers get started at
00:28:41.960 acast.com slash advertise you know la6 or whatever and i was like yeah that wasn't the bit i was i
00:28:51.380 was doing right but then part of me this is so sad a lot of the time like guys will watch other
00:28:57.540 guys like at the club when there's a show and then when a girl goes on stage all the guys just leave
00:29:02.680 yeah like they don't even want to watch it of course not so then i was like well thank you for
00:29:06.500 listening i love attention wait so you stay for my set all right i'm obsessed with that someone's a
00:29:13.500 fan but i also like in comedy i i because it was like my second third career yeah i didn't have a
00:29:20.560 huge ego like it didn't define me and i just like tried to learn from the people around me and then
00:29:25.720 like when i could sense that it was just like there you go i was i would just be kind of like
00:29:30.120 thank you i appreciate your work i love your i know thank you for your time when i talked to
00:29:35.260 marybeth once she was like oh yeah one time i left the club and he followed me out and was like
00:29:39.480 giving me notes on my set yeah as i'm walking out and he was like why aren't you writing this down
00:29:44.240 she said writing this down is this homework that's why she literally went why would i do that
00:29:49.320 no i'm not entertaining you're just talking at me i didn't ask like you're just kind of following
00:29:54.500 me and saying words i haven't been listening the whole time you've been talking so it's so
00:29:58.540 it's so funny i do think also yeah commanding a room i guess is a like masculine quality but i
00:30:06.040 think women are the leaders right like we're the leaders in every family yeah i disagree i think
00:30:11.820 commanding a room is just when you're it like when you have it true right so it's like it's so it's
00:30:17.220 so specific to people who like just have it the ability to capture an audience right is is an
00:30:23.220 inherent trait to some people and a real struggle to others well it's funny people do they get very
00:30:29.340 impressed with stand-up because it's like a big fear for a lot of people and they'll be like how
00:30:32.820 do you do it and i'm like my brain's just weird we're like i'm scared to drive but like i can talk
00:30:38.120 in front of 2 000 people and that's my that's my journey in this life like i just got my skill set
00:30:43.500 that was gifted yeah like for some reason something's twisted where i'm like this is safe
00:30:47.060 yeah this is safe but like me trying to drive 10 miles per hour i'm like something bad's gonna
00:30:52.840 happen that's right i know you're a notorious not driver yes don't like to drive well i'm a
00:30:57.640 i'm a city girl you know that's true you're a new york girl i'm a new yorker yeah i try to make it
00:31:02.540 like it's a cool thing but at some point my mom was like it would be nice like something happened
00:31:07.820 to someone that you could get in a car yeah you should probably have that general skill yeah so
00:31:12.240 that's i i all last summer that was my goal to get my driver's license and i was like i had a
00:31:18.220 therapist about it like it was intense but because i literally was like writing like i'm gonna pass
00:31:24.380 my driver's license because it got kind of mental for me yeah totally also like having a man judging
00:31:29.920 a woman driving that feels sexy so misogyny no it's literally setting me up for failure well at
00:31:35.260 the dmb i also i do i would love to see the stats i think they're harder on the female drivers oh 0.85
00:31:40.480 i'm sure and i'm like i'm sure they fucking are and so i try i also try to come in like kind of 0.51
00:31:45.520 like i didn't want to dress too cute like i was really like you know i was going for an audition 0.95
00:31:50.600 yeah like i was like this is i came with a blazer i was like i'm a serious driver business
00:31:55.360 professional driver my hair back my hair back and no makeup and right but i passed it i passed it
00:32:03.680 yes you know they don't tell you anymore at the moment if you pass it because there were physical
00:32:08.580 altercations happening because people they'd be like you didn't pass and they'd get into like
00:32:13.860 huge fights immediately swing on them yeah that's crazy the dmv is iconic yeah even when i i remember
00:32:20.680 when i got my license it was at the dmv right by my in my hometown and there was like you know
00:32:27.180 like kids from my high school were all getting their driver's license and stuff and there was
00:32:30.380 a known like instructor there that would fail everybody and so my first morning i was like the
00:32:37.360 one of the first appointments i was so nervous and he like walked up to my car because you need 0.86
00:32:41.940 to like pull up and i he walked up to my car and he was and i was like of course i fucking get this 0.79
00:32:46.700 guy of course i do and then he came to my window and he like said a name that was not my name and 0.89
00:32:51.460 i was like oh no that's not me and he was like oh and he went to the car behind me and then i got a
00:32:55.700 different guy the universe came in yeah i got so lucky god literally was like not today yeah
00:33:00.600 you're like she needs it she needs the win but to have someone watching you it's like it's like
00:33:06.820 have you ever like typed in front of someone like you just forget how to do it or when you're like
00:33:11.320 trying to find something to show someone that's funny and it's taking too long and you're like
00:33:14.880 just free i swear it's forget it it's fine how come every photo in your phone that you've ever
00:33:18.560 had to show someone is never there right when i'm trying to show them right when you need it it's 0.98
00:33:23.420 at the climax of my story also fuck all these dmv people that get off on failing kids i mean look 0.99
00:33:29.020 most of these teen people shouldn't be of course i will yeah i was in my 30s when i went 0.99
00:33:33.420 no i wasn't
00:33:35.580 i was like look at us together and you go babe we're not in a i got mine late for a teen i got
00:33:43.900 mine when i was 17 yeah i think going to about to be 18 so that's when i got mine keep bragging
00:33:48.460 oh yeah i was i was a sturdy 30 i was a late 32 i was late into my early 30s
00:33:56.300 i did pass but i haven't really driven since because i don't have to it's okay all you had
00:34:02.640 to do was conquer the i have a husband like that's called a driver oh yeah my man drives too
00:34:07.780 he prefers to drive which i which i am like awesome because i don't want i love empowering 0.97
00:34:12.380 them in ways that they feel like that's perfect useful yeah because i actually don't fuck with
00:34:17.260 directions because i'm a creative so i let him like show me where it is and like i don't want
00:34:22.860 to be involved in logistics like that's not my purpose on this planet yeah no to get under
00:34:26.820 paperwork and yeah no thank you it's so funny how we both have a man so that we he's there yeah he's
00:34:33.020 just kind of there you know and honestly if you find a man that adds value to your life yeah not
00:34:38.700 to fully red pill this pod but if he adds value perfect why would you keep a guy that doesn't
00:34:44.980 bring value i agree if he's smart and he believes in you and you can bounce stuff off off him yeah
00:34:50.240 and he doesn't have a cte yeah then keep him around if he makes you feel like you want to
00:34:56.580 be around him right i well and i'm sure you get this question a lot too because because of that
00:35:00.860 which like i do but i get a lot of people asking me or him if they ever meet him like
00:35:05.860 how like almost like how he's able to be with me like and not feel like weird and it's a lot of
00:35:13.820 it's coming from women and it's it's in earnest it's very like did you have to do something to
00:35:19.140 kind of get there um like so one of one of my friends asked him once um and he was like i mean
00:35:25.620 no i didn't have to like work to get there because like all of the things you're describing are
00:35:29.680 reasons why i i was drawn to her so like it would be crazy for me to be with her and then want to
00:35:34.740 get rid of it no i'm gonna cry it's very like to him it's very simple he's like no i like i would
00:35:42.700 be crazy to think that other people wouldn't love her for the reasons i love her like obviously i
00:35:47.600 love her like he's like it makes sense that so many people love her because i do like it's the
00:35:51.360 same thing well it's interesting because that's layered like him liking you despite like you
00:35:57.800 being so vocal about hating men right people get confused about that and i'm like because he knows
00:36:02.380 he's not the man i'm making fun of right because guess who's also making fun of the kind of men i
00:36:06.900 him right he's on my side being like i can't stand that i can't stand that and it is fun to feel like
00:36:13.280 you have like um a spy yeah i'm like what are what are the men talking what like how did we get here
00:36:18.860 and my husband like he's this like big white gray haired dude like he looks maga like like he he's
00:36:28.240 so funny people go to his comedy shows thinking they're gonna get some kind and he just turns it
00:36:32.960 on them yeah and i kind of feel like that's beautiful too for him to be able to bring in
00:36:38.140 all kinds of people and trick them into listening absolutely because sometimes they will only hear it
00:36:42.800 from people who look like that exactly so that's why they're imperative too and sometimes i like
00:36:47.100 having those conversations with him to be like why are men doing this right why do you think this is
00:36:51.580 happening and where do you think we're misunderstood but that's where i started that like i had this
00:36:56.620 hand on the street series with male comics yes where i was like they were comfortable with me
00:37:01.660 which is why i could push it yeah because i don't i don't want to like get anyone in trouble or like
00:37:07.340 have anyone lose their job right like that would be fun though but like it's more i wanted the guys
00:37:12.920 i would ask them stuff about women and sometimes it became very like eye-opening yeah and it was
00:37:18.800 good to have those conversations right i i've talked to about like obviously i joke about
00:37:23.580 hating men all the time and i talk about how like they start guilty and then they have to prove
00:37:27.960 themselves innocent in my eyes which i think is a very fair way to move and like i've like gotten
00:37:33.020 like out of my way almost to like explain not for men but for women specifically who get afraid of
00:37:39.640 vocalizing those feelings that like it's a form of protection which i think we've earned right like
00:37:46.400 women have been violated in more ways than you could ever imagine for thousands of years if 0.99
00:37:52.320 anything what i'm doing what you're doing i always say is like tip of the fucking iceberg like you 0.98
00:37:56.840 guys are lucky that i was only born recently you know what i'm saying like imagine if i was born 0.99
00:38:02.200 hundreds of years ago like bitch i would have been lighting that shit up like that's what i'm saying 1.00
00:38:05.460 like in every there's laws now yeah every reincarnation of me bitch is antagonizing men 1.00
00:38:10.180 because they can't help but violate women so it's like it's one of those things where i'm like you 0.98
00:38:14.760 can feel safe to vocalize how you feel because that is the only reason women even have rights 0.94
00:38:20.520 today is because of women like that women women who refuse to be quiet about it is the only reason 0.82
00:38:26.520 you and i are able to talk about it let alone make money off of it and that's why i laugh when 0.95
00:38:30.940 they say things like oh she's like profiting off of women's misery what i am extorting someone for
00:38:36.420 sure for money and i can promise you it's not women who love me it's awful men who can't shut 1.00
00:38:40.980 the fuck up like i am literally using and abusing your stupidity to build an empire like i stand on 1.00
00:38:47.260 the shoulders of men who hate me like my best-selling book is purely because men are so 1.00
00:38:52.780 fucking awful women are now like i'm gonna buy a book and i'm gonna learn how to fucking de-center 1.00
00:38:57.800 them i'm gonna do that we all see it but you fucking verbalize it you put it into fucking 1.00
00:39:02.960 a thesis a hypothesis a conclusion you fucking write it out you know every time i think you're 0.99
00:39:08.900 done you're like and another thing and i've also said too i'm like you guys think you need me 0.99
00:39:13.280 to make women hate you girl you you that pr is all your own like what are you talking about 0.99
00:39:20.220 bitch like they really think they're like you're convincing women to hate men bitch please i was 1.00
00:39:25.340 like you want to hate men just spend a couple minutes with one hang out with one for about 1.00
00:39:28.920 10 minutes you'll find a couple reasons let's start from the beginning some of these men hate
00:39:34.480 us right yeah like there's so many women like you're in a relationship and then one day you're
00:39:38.940 like i don't love him because he hates me like i this problem but like our podcast so many girls
00:39:47.260 are like hey thank you so much i finally broke up with my boyfriend like we're getting gross to like 0.93
00:39:52.480 just same yeah oh i'm a home wrecker bitch i'm like i'm wrecking that home when someone gets 0.88
00:39:59.580 divorced i always say congratulations me too what am i gonna be like i'm like whatever you were in 0.98
00:40:04.920 you had the balls to get out of there to find something better because life is too short to
00:40:08.980 stay with the wrong i agree and just because you spent 10 years with one doesn't mean you have to
00:40:12.680 spend the next 30 100 because we all evolve also some of these men they are fun in the beginning
00:40:17.500 and they are convincing in the beginning right they are tall in the beginning right they have
00:40:22.140 a funny accent in the beginning and they their perfume smells good in the beginning but guess
00:40:27.600 what you're not into him you're into the specific perfume that he's wearing right
00:40:30.940 because that's funny because they hate that they hate that but yeah people also will even like my
00:40:38.940 mom's friends will ask like if my husband how he's handling like that i'm i don't know doing
00:40:43.680 stuff like that i'm doing well you know you're being so hilarious for a living how do you feel
00:40:48.600 about that having a funny woman for a wife and he's a comedian himself right so like but his 0.95
00:40:53.980 thing is like he's had a great career yeah he's an older guy that has seen a lot of shit and he's 1.00
00:41:01.160 loves being able to sit back and like watch me do what i do and he calls me his pension pussy 0.99
00:41:07.980 like he loves it and i also i've always just been looking for a partner yeah i'm not looking for 0.98
00:41:16.440 someone like i i just want to be me and if you want to be in my life with me that's great i also
00:41:21.980 think because i met him in my 30s he met me later in life we're two individuals yeah that just like 0.57
00:41:28.000 fuck with each other we don't complete each other right exactly yeah i don't if something were to 0.94
00:41:33.920 happen we'd both be okay right and i think that's what's actually so fucking romantic about it that 0.99
00:41:39.260 we don't need each other yeah and it's like a choice at that point right like you're choosing
00:41:42.680 each other because you don't need each other we're not there's not a trauma yeah absolutely
00:41:46.620 and it's not a like obligatory thing it's not like oh i feel like i have to be in a relationship i
00:41:52.020 feel like i have to stay with this person and it's like it's a choice like you're like i choose to be
00:41:56.060 with this person because they make me happy and they like uplift me and amplify me like even um
00:42:01.640 with my man too it's been very like he like loves everything that is so like obvious about me and a
00:42:09.240 lot about me like i always say and i say a lot not in a derogatory way it just is like i am a big
00:42:14.800 personality to be with like yeah i'm loud mama for real i just hear entertaining right so i was
00:42:20.580 like i am i am all of that but it's like it's one of those where it's like everything that i am it's
00:42:26.140 worth it it's hard to be with me but it's worth it i'll tell you that much but also like when you
00:42:30.000 can laugh with your partner girl you're telling me who cares if you're crying we're loving
00:42:34.880 i even like uh i've asked him before i'm like who do you think's funnier between the two of us
00:42:39.460 who do you think and then he was like well you obviously and then i was like period that's the
00:42:45.600 right answer and he's beautiful yeah no not to be you know talking about your man but that i can
00:42:52.400 respect yeah no beautiful looking man yes because if he's going to be around at least make it
00:42:56.540 beautiful to look that's what i'm saying i'm like believe it or not ugly people cheat too 1.00
00:43:00.000 yeah if you can believe ugly people suck i would argue ugly men cheat a lot more cheat a lot more 0.99
00:43:06.560 yeah i've also really good looking men have seen enough tits they're tired by 35 they're like i've 1.00
00:43:12.520 seen them all i'm good i just want a cigarette and relax where these fucking guys these fucking 1.00
00:43:19.040 guys have been bullied their whole life and never talked to women who hate women the second they get 1.00
00:43:23.420 attention they they start yeah they start going crazy they start losing their minds for girls who
00:43:28.240 single listening my advice just also with men is like really don't settle i agree they say the
00:43:35.040 happiest girls are the ones who aren't with a guy that's true or they're in a happy relationship
00:43:41.440 yeah and one thing shout out to my mom she was so good at like getting me out of her she would hold 1.00
00:43:47.100 my hand and get me out of relationships when she saw because she was just like life is too short 0.67
00:43:51.380 right and it takes one person to be like oh i fuck with that person yeah but if you're stuck 1.00
00:43:56.040 with ding dong yeah i've never said that in my word but in my life but you suck with a ding dong 1.00
00:44:01.120 i don't care how comfortable it is get get your stuff and leave i don't care if your cds are in 1.00
00:44:06.340 his core for real well it's like i said like you said it's your life is way too fucking short 0.92
00:44:11.880 and at this point like women did not fight for as much as we have now and as little as we have now 0.99
00:44:18.360 there's still a long way to go uh women did not fight for all that for you to settle for a fucking 0.99
00:44:23.100 loser like I was like I'd rat you you should rather be alone which is what I've always said 0.99
00:44:27.960 I'm like that that was something I made peace with right before I think like actually for real 0.98
00:44:32.840 accepted right before I met my man now but I was like you know what that's okay because I am not
00:44:39.420 unhappy like my life is amazing and awesome and I and I'm surrounded by love and I'm deeply loved 0.83
00:44:44.880 by many people family friends women I was like women's love is like irreplaceable in my opinion
00:44:51.680 like you could live without a man loving you but you could never live without a woman loving you
00:44:55.760 and i really do believe that to be true like without men you're like yeah whatever but like
00:44:59.920 with women it's like oh my god what a void life it's like when a woman compliments you versus a
00:45:04.380 man right it's like it means something if a woman compliments me on the street i'll cry yeah i'll 1.00
00:45:09.020 literally be like i really did it like in fact take it you want it here you like it here take it
00:45:14.300 here's a coupon here's a coupon let's go shopping together i also feel like relationships are 0.99
00:45:19.640 mirrors so if your guy sucks you're seeing yourself through his fucked up lens that's true 1.00
00:45:25.940 that's why sometimes your girlfriends when they're in a better relationship i'm like you're a shell 1.00
00:45:29.500 of yourself like you're not yourself right so it's super important also when you get out of a
00:45:34.880 relationship that's my level up time i'm always i feel like relationships are like a corporate job
00:45:40.000 every time i leave one i'm getting a better one like you see you're just moving up the ladder
00:45:44.860 and these girls when we break up we're doing duolingo yeah we're learning japanese we're
00:45:50.740 starting like a certification and a certification yeah we're starting a non-profit i sound like
00:45:56.120 her ex-boyfriend certification that's crazy sorry i'm really smart um but yeah these girls oh they 0.85
00:46:01.660 get the like they they start doing their makeup even cuntier like every time a girl gets a breakup 0.87
00:46:07.340 i'm like she's on a pokemon on the next level yeah she's evolving evolving oh my god when she 0.95
00:46:11.740 emerges i love a breakup to that i'm fucking married it's more complicated but breakups are 0.69
00:46:16.420 so beautiful my favorite part of breakups is like when your friend gets to a point where you can talk 0.98
00:46:21.280 shit oh and you're oh oh my god oh my god i'm like i've had 12 banger jokes that i have not 0.93
00:46:29.500 been able to fire off oh my god i'm so glad you hate him now i'm so glad you hate him now let's 1.00
00:46:33.580 talk about it but you have to wait for her to say it first you have to wait oh my god the way i hear
00:46:38.300 like it feels like when you play mario kart and then it's like the noise that plays when all the
00:46:42.220 traffic lights going it's so niche that's how i feel i'm like oh my god oh my god this is my
00:46:47.240 my time has come my time has come and then you're starting to send like photos of him making fun of
00:46:51.820 him after like it just it's beautiful i know one time we were we were on when we were on tour uh
00:46:59.000 we were all like delirious and and sitting up and late at night and we were all talking and um my
00:47:04.740 friend carrie right over there she had brought up an ex and we were all like doing a competition to
00:47:09.960 see to bring up what we thought he looked like better and i was like this is my bread and but
00:47:15.940 you have no i am so good at comparisons you guys are fighting for second and i literally was like
00:47:20.600 let me go last i literally told them i was like you were you're like i'm the closer i was like
00:47:23.960 i already had it like the minute you showed me a pic i had one and then and then mine killed and
00:47:29.560 i did win so well that's why girls are creative directors i always say like when you meet a guy
00:47:35.500 and they come up with the funny nicknames right like i love when girls are married and they still 0.50
00:47:40.040 have his nickname in the phone yeah and also like as the friend of the girl with the guy like i'm
00:47:45.580 sticking with the nickname yeah i love that when they have monikers like we had in my college
00:47:50.600 girlfriends uh who i'm still friends with to this day like there was multiple of them at one point
00:47:55.020 we're talking to a a chris so then we had to start like adding stuff in front of their names
00:47:59.780 well everyone's man's name is chris yeah right so that was not even every man ever's name is 0.96
00:48:03.940 ch also ch that's yes are they french like ch like what the fuck like what i'm annoyed i'm 0.99
00:48:13.200 annoyed yeah they uh we had one that was dick pic chris because he always sent dick pics like 0.99
00:48:17.920 at least three times a week yeah to one of my girlfriends and then we had motorcycle chris 0.98
00:48:21.740 because there was one that had a motorcycle yeah there was one with a boat so we were like oh that's
00:48:25.800 important and he was the best one he was number one for us that's important also it could be like
00:48:29.660 something very very subtle like this guy played golf once and we played we called him caddy daddy
00:48:35.260 and like he doesn't even play golf but like whatever you need to do to make sure you're
00:48:39.120 texting the right one right yeah you have to label to show up in the wrong chris everybody
00:48:43.740 everybody has to wear name tags until everyone learns but you know what's crazy about tour is
00:48:48.720 men's names in um the south what's going on down there lots of x's yep braxton like dixon like
00:49:00.580 and then the like cypresses wait that's a place in greece you're like that's just a country
00:49:08.120 i'm like italy yeah for real yeah but it's they yeah it's um hard to take them seriously and then
00:49:17.240 they do side have you seen like do their hair to the side what does that mean they have like a side
00:49:22.200 bang oh my god they do but they enable each other it's like an echo chamber in the south do they do
00:49:27.220 it like under the hat too like yes and then they put sunglasses on top of the hat oh man and they're 0.99
00:49:33.060 like perfect yeah let's go out here red as fuck by the way branley yeah it's like all different 0.53
00:49:40.020 kinds of yeah or it's like syllables like bow that's a cough they're just yeah those are just 0.91
00:49:45.900 noises yeah yeah Wyatt Wyatt when I first heard of Wyatt I was like we're gonna have to start from
00:49:51.860 the beginning what is Wyatt I'm from Brooklyn guys names are like Joe like I was thrown Brimley
00:49:58.800 what the hell I don't know that was that was a man his name was Brimley no one knew who knows
00:50:04.620 no one knew who knows but girls with gh at the end of their name I respect you because you had to
00:50:09.420 come up with hard spelling as a young young child you know what i respect your culture i respect
00:50:13.660 your culture i respect your culture of that gh i e gh you have to say that to everyone every time
00:50:18.740 you spell it that's that's trauma imagine wait i love the name drew thank you because it's like
00:50:27.080 simple and you could send an email and people could think you're just like a gay man with
00:50:30.360 exclamation mark right and that's actually where my mom named me uh like gave me a gender neutral
00:50:35.340 name because she said when she was pregnant with me she saw like um this program on tv that was
00:50:40.980 about um it was like studying the differences between like job applications and like acceptance 0.89
00:50:46.660 rate and so like if the applications looked exactly the same and one had like a feminine
00:50:50.980 name like a bethany and then one was like nick they would almost always pick the man yeah so my 1.00
00:50:55.680 mom picked a gender neutral name and every job interview i've ever fucking had like in corporate 0.85
00:51:00.220 america or not like they would be like oh i thought you were gonna be a boy like when they 0.93
00:51:03.320 met me see i love especially in sports they were assumed immediately that i was a man i love that
00:51:08.240 i have a one of my managers name is mac and i was talking to this guy i'm like i'll hook i'll talk
00:51:12.020 i'll connect you with my manager mac and he was like can we talk to him and i call her and i'm
00:51:15.800 like he's gonna be in a rude awakening yeah don't tell him don't don't tell him i'm like mac's about 0.98
00:51:20.620 to fuck his shit up mac man is about to come in in these streets i know i i sometimes feel like 0.99
00:51:27.800 with emails people yeah hannah's such a fucking girly name which you know what it's good to be 1.00
00:51:34.460 girly true it's like we want to throw like a girl we want to be a girl right there's so much 0.98
00:51:38.780 subconscious just like you've got social dialed in search is doing its thing so why do your
00:51:46.660 marketing results look the same as six months ago that's because you're fishing in the same pond as
00:51:51.620 everyone else podcast listeners are a different audience entirely more engaged harder to reach
00:51:57.540 through traditional channels
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00:52:23.100 The way people speak to you
00:52:24.700 and the way you can't speak to them 1.00
00:52:26.220 because then you're a cunt. 1.00
00:52:27.080 so i want to say that word but that's okay yeah are you i am are you a strong emailer oh yeah i'm 1.00
00:52:33.420 a very like visceral emailer i can i can really dice someone up in an email but that's just
00:52:38.580 because i'm a virgo i think so i'm like i really enjoy insulting especially in the written word
00:52:43.140 i do love to write you do all capitals when you want them to know that you're yelling yeah or if
00:52:47.740 it's if it's professional if it's professional and i want them to know i'm yelling i'll i'll bold it
00:52:52.920 or i'll italicize it italicize i'm obsessed with that that's artistic yeah like you're the
00:52:58.460 michelangelo of yelling people that's wait that's italicizing stuff yeah oh i get i don't know if
00:53:04.300 gen z's know how to italicize no for real that's it's complicated i know or even write an email
00:53:08.560 like i i really you guys need to learn how to write a strongly worded email it will come in handy
00:53:12.460 i have actually ghostwritten emails for people i've ghostwritten texts for people one of my
00:53:17.620 my cousin when we were um on vacation together like a couple years ago um she her boyfriend she
00:53:24.100 found out he had cheated so she was breaking up with him and then his like dad was texting her 0.95
00:53:28.580 or something and she was like what the fuck like i don't want to listen to this guy like and he was 0.99
00:53:33.440 making excuses for his son whatever the fuck um and so then she gave me her phone i was like give 0.99
00:53:38.940 it to me i wrote the meanest text you could possibly imagine in a way that was like like 0.97
00:53:44.300 it made sense for her to say it but i i'm like i can strike your tone too like if i know how you
00:53:49.540 talk i can write it like that i've written several for my sister uh i've written some
00:53:54.500 for my friends you're an unpaid ghostwriter right i am i don't know it is funny when you
00:53:58.100 tell drake to hit my line if you need someone
00:54:00.080 he loves them
00:54:03.880 loves ghostwriters i'm good that's why if someone if you need to break up with someone or you need 0.98
00:54:12.300 to like really stick it to a bitch yeah but i feel like it's good to have a ghost writer sometimes 0.94
00:54:17.660 with texts like i see other people's situations so fucking clear for real like when i'm your friend 0.99
00:54:22.240 and i do know everyone's fonts i know you're you're wording i know what words you use and we 0.92
00:54:27.120 never forget and with flirting too because i'm like you know the second you start flirting with
00:54:31.120 someone you actually like you're like i don't know words i don't know sentences so that's why 0.96
00:54:35.060 you need your friend who doesn't give a fuck yeah for real i have this new thing for flirting because 0.99
00:54:39.160 on board and i can't have him flirted in five years that i want to tell the girls about because 0.99
00:54:43.260 someone asked me they were like should you wait a long time before you text and i'm like honestly
00:54:47.560 that's pick me like you're literally putting on a timer to like look like you don't care about this 0.98
00:54:53.480 man text him back immediately with typos so it looks like you don't give a fuck like like you're 0.98
00:55:00.580 on the go like you're texting an assistant that you're like i'm literally too busy for this figure 0.99
00:55:04.220 out what that meant yeah you just you da vinci code that shit reverse psychology like texting 0.95
00:55:09.180 back something that makes no sense yeah and and you're like oh sorry i meant to send that to 0.98
00:55:12.820 someone else there you go like just be a mess and be so chaotic he's like either she's obsessed with
00:55:18.700 me or she hates me and like keep men on their toes and that will keep them yeah that will keep
00:55:23.140 them interested that's for sure at the end of the day the right one you could do anything and he'll
00:55:28.120 i agree can't say the wrong thing to the right person kind of deal period wait so that's a fun
00:55:35.200 little transition into our fun facts i love a segue i do have some fun facts for you oh okay
00:55:40.900 you can tell me if they're fun but they're about you oh yeah i should have specified that they're
00:55:45.920 not about random i was like i like animals for real okay this one says um when you were 16 you
00:55:54.240 played on the boys tennis team at vegan high school because they didn't have a girls team
00:55:58.040 and there was a new york times article written about it that's crazy okay she's the man i love
00:56:03.860 that you got that because that's so like you would appreciate that yet title nine is basically this
00:56:09.000 thing that says if they don't have a girls team the girl has to be able to try out for the boys
00:56:14.080 team yeah so i tried out i made the team and we were winning everything and other teams were
00:56:18.340 getting mad that we had me on the team girl and it was it was so it was so crazy but the beautiful
00:56:26.120 story of it all was that when i went to college they funded the public school a girls team that
00:56:32.160 my dad ended up coaching oh that's like a beautiful look at you making a difference in
00:56:36.400 the world just trying to get but women in sports baby women in stem let's go period oh my god but
00:56:42.580 yeah i made you would have loved this i've made men like break their rackets that's literally what
00:56:47.360 the next one says it says like one time a boy cracked his racket in half in frustration when 0.92
00:56:51.100 you beat him in a championship match drew you would have orgasm period you would have i'm not
00:56:55.040 even kidding i'm not even kidding hannah i got chills oh my god it's amazing but the funniest
00:57:00.040 thing is like in my head i'm like these are high school like i played internationally like these
00:57:05.000 i'm playing high school boys so i'm like if i lose i'm gonna be pissed right but tennis is not a
00:57:09.460 physical sport it's very mental like we're not like pushing each other yeah so i was technically
00:57:14.220 and mentally and physically better than them yes and they'd lose and they'd be so mad yelling
00:57:19.660 screaming and i was just like sorry you're like sorry girl the boys on the team also my team were 0.74
00:57:26.740 very supportive where they'd start fucking with the other teams they'd be like hey take it easy 0.97
00:57:30.780 on her like she's she just started this year they were like yeah they're fucking doing bets 0.71
00:57:35.980 under the table as a black market but the guys on my team knew me and they were really supportive
00:57:40.980 and loved it that's really nice though i'm glad that you they were all supportive of you being
00:57:44.500 well because we all like trained together yeah um but i do think because i was able to like survive
00:57:49.380 being in such a male dominated sport stand up didn't feel as scary for me no that makes a lot
00:57:56.420 of sense yeah honestly and also to like the fact that you it speaks to how courageous you are too
00:58:01.960 because you have to be really brave to do that especially at 16 like when you're in like your
00:58:06.200 prime like centering men phase like in high school especially that's what my prime like
00:58:12.200 pick me phase was unbeknownst to me at the time obviously there was no terminology for it at the 0.98
00:58:16.420 time but like the fact that you were able to do that and sustain and keep doing it is fucking
00:58:21.440 awesome i have to give a shout out to my dad because my dad i remember early on i'd like play
00:58:26.440 a boy and i like lost something and he like pulled me to the side and he was like did you let him win
00:58:31.040 and i was like no like i swear and he goes if you had a crush on him you let him win 0.98
00:58:34.160 not good not cool that's not how we do things get your fucking head in that my dad always was like 0.98
00:58:38.820 my dad literally was like never let a man distract you like that's how i live my life 0.98
00:58:43.000 and my dad so if i saw a guy like being cute and stuff i'm like he's trying to distract me
00:58:48.920 like i literally act like a male nice try jezebel
00:58:51.440 i'm like why are you wearing your shirt so tight around yeah you're trying to distract me with your 0.99
00:58:57.140 big titties nice try ho it's not gonna work on me yeah like when you walk away your butt looks good 0.99
00:59:02.240 get out of my face temptation i'm not gonna fall for it but my dad raised me like like a boy and 0.98
00:59:09.320 that's it was and and he valued like like he never talked about my looks my dad it was always like
00:59:15.100 how hard are you working are you having good sports it's a beautiful thing it's beautiful and
00:59:18.800 not to be on a soapbox but that's why i do think women in sports is good because when you have 1.00
00:59:23.660 those years where your body starts changing and your hormones are raging if you could put some
00:59:28.000 confidence into sports and it's not just based on like our guys liking me because i was awkward as
00:59:33.980 fuck braces acne but i would go home and be like i won my match i feel good about myself yeah and
00:59:39.500 i was like these legs and this body is yeah i'm doing cool stuff hell yeah i think i i absolutely 0.99
00:59:45.140 am such a proponent of that too and it's also building confidence like you said in skills like
00:59:49.860 things that like make you unique make you special like it's like highlighting all the wonderful
00:59:54.600 things about you that have nothing to do with your looks which i've talked about that's like
00:59:58.440 because a lot of times and i know you get this question too is like how do you stay so confident
01:00:02.040 when you're like in a male-dominated industry when you like get harassed by men constantly
01:00:06.760 like online especially and i've always said like i mean obviously misogyny like relies heavily on
01:00:12.820 women putting a lot of their worth and value in their looks and they just kind of assume that all
01:00:17.760 women will be so deeply offended if you call them fat and ugly like they just automatically assume 1.00
01:00:22.500 that's the meanest thing you could ever say um as a very as as an actual mean bitch that's not 1.00
01:00:27.240 the meanest thing you could ever say i can speak confidently to that you go it's uncreative yeah 0.99
01:00:30.780 that's actually so low lift it's not even funny um you guys need to get your fucking money up in 0.94
01:00:35.860 that regard um but i i've said before too i'm like my confidence other than the fact that that's a 0.98
01:00:40.960 lie like ugly you're tripping fat depends on who you ask like i'm a big fat fatty compared to some
01:00:45.180 people and some people i'm not so it really just depends it's all relative right and so like 0.98
01:00:49.380 with that i've like said before too also my confidence does it all of my confidence comes
01:00:55.000 from things that you cannot physically see on me so like it's like everything that i pull
01:00:59.440 and derive my confidence from it are things you can't see and that's why it's never i've been i'm
01:01:04.380 like you see my hand it's not shaking that's how i feel about men i also think like it doesn't
01:01:10.500 matter what you look like how someone carries themselves like you know when someone walks in
01:01:15.200 a room and like you said you're like they got it yeah they got the sauce yeah and the sauce is not
01:01:20.780 the size of your nose no for real the color of your skin right like the sauce is like oh i get
01:01:25.840 shivers from someone yeah it's like it's literally like you like it's like that's what that's why i
01:01:29.840 always say like confidence that you and i have is like easily accessible to everyone it's it's you
01:01:34.620 just have to give yourself permission like i did a long time ago so that's why i believe i'm the
01:01:39.300 most awesome at no detraction of anyone else it's just like i think every woman is awesome and not
01:01:43.820 to talk about our inner child but like you know when you see a seven-year-old who like doesn't 0.93
01:01:47.080 give a fuck yeah like remember who you were when you were seven you didn't care what boys thought 0.97
01:01:52.100 you knew what you like to do for fun yeah for real you showed up at class and you're like let's go 1.00
01:01:56.720 yeah you were so confident about it that's what i think like your 20s is like figuring out who you 0.96
01:02:01.000 are in your 30s you're like oh it's who i was i just have to deconstruct all the bullshit and
01:02:05.980 you're walking in it that people put on to me 100 period oh my gosh we would be so good on a panel
01:02:12.200 by the way put us on a panel put us on a panel you love a panel don't you i do love a panel i love a
01:02:18.260 they love me on a panel honestly oh also i just want to add that's why some of us let's work on
01:02:24.000 our personalities right let's work on our personalities and i think shout out to like
01:02:27.820 your pod and a lot of these like hilarious pods out there that i think like helps people be like
01:02:32.160 oh conversation is important right being charming is important listening is important because you
01:02:37.740 ever leave a conversation with someone be like wow that was incredible like good chat you know
01:02:42.140 in like ireland yeah it's about the chat yeah it's about it's about the vibe learn how to roast 0.98
01:02:47.380 someone with confidence and beauty and grace like girls are working on when it's not their fault 0.99
01:02:53.780 it's the fucking patriarchy but you're working on your pores you're working on your cuticles 0.99
01:02:57.780 you're working on the size of your nostrils no yeah let's work on our personalities yeah 1.00
01:03:02.540 men as well yeah for real they they especially i was like man men are so uninteresting it's not
01:03:07.560 even funny they need some classes literally my we joke about this all the time with my friends but
01:03:11.740 like our friend ian he calls uh people punishers which are like when they come up and they talk to
01:03:18.100 you and they have no conversation skill they have no personality and it's like that's how i feel
01:03:23.080 about a lot of awful men when they come to like harass me at that point doesn't feel like
01:03:27.580 conversation feels like harassment but he's like he literally calls them punishers he's like you're
01:03:31.860 punishing me you're punishing me in this conversation well our our life we have to do so
01:03:36.660 much small talk with so many different people and then like like the fame stuff the influencer stuff 0.54
01:03:41.620 like the energies get fucking weird oh my god in those parties you talk to famous people and you're
01:03:46.620 like have you ever spoken to another human ever sometimes i talk to famous people and i'm like 0.99
01:03:51.420 holy fuck holy fuck has anyone ever have you ever asked a question i've never i leave and i'm like 0.99
01:03:57.600 that was me that was definitely me i'm like am i fucking awful or was i just talking a million 1.00
01:04:02.180 but then you talk to your friend and you're like we're normal yeah let's add a little mercy laugh 0.92
01:04:06.820 every now and then like let's move the story oh my some of it's brutal some of it's really bad
01:04:12.840 and like honestly like i i'm shocked when i meet like and you i know you've met a ton like a list
01:04:18.440 don't point at me like that yeah i know i know you have i know you have though because you i know
01:04:23.040 you've had these interactions because you've met a lot of a list talent so have i where like 0.90
01:04:26.380 sometimes i'm like oh god god help you if you ever go on a podcast like oh my fucking god i was like 0.85
01:04:32.280 if you are ever on a podcast i hope your team cuts it up a million ways there's a reason these 0.94
01:04:36.920 people don't do hour-long podcast which is aussie smart good for them yeah honestly stay
01:04:41.820 know your strengths honestly and i'll tell you this story i have told it on here before but i've
01:04:47.660 never obviously i've never said who it is but it's about so he one time i i heard this girl say like
01:04:53.040 because i asked i was like i might have seen him as something i didn't end up seeing him
01:04:56.340 but like they were like if you do talk to him right do not ask anything outside of these two
01:05:03.740 questions and the two questions were like how do you feel and um what do you like about it like
01:05:08.740 that was it like they were very like three words max like very easy so then when i get to the event
01:05:15.020 i'm like you know obviously one of the best parts of this industry is talking to people behind the
01:05:18.980 scenes and being like so who do we love who do we hate it's my favorite that's one of my favorite
01:05:22.220 the makeup artist oh my god it's like the gossip i'm like is she a monster yeah i'm like who's the 0.85
01:05:28.300 meanest person you've ever fucking talked to like i love asking people that and so like i was like 0.92
01:05:32.900 sleuthing i'm like asking around i'm like so what's his deal like what is that because i've 0.99
01:05:36.600 also heard through the grapevine that he's misogynistic but i've never confirmed that
01:05:40.180 so i was like what is this you can never do misogynistic that's crazy that's crazy that
01:05:45.860 doesn't support the patriarchy so i literally was like who i was like why well you know because
01:05:50.040 they edited my stuff down and then they told me do not ask him anything outside of this and then 0.89
01:05:55.540 she goes i was like is that because he's like is he fucked up or what and she goes no i think it's 1.00
01:05:59.780 because he's fucking stupid that was a verbatim quote she said fucking stupid i laughed so hard 1.00
01:06:06.240 i said girl what are you talking about and she said that he literally does not like improv he 1.00
01:06:12.240 doesn't like pivots he doesn't he doesn't like anything fun when he gets questions girl when he 0.98
01:06:18.400 by the way this is a beautiful man you're talking about that girls are jerking off to every night
01:06:23.120 continue girl he literally when he goes on appearances like big shows whatever they give 0.95
01:06:29.220 him everything in advance they write answers out he memorizes them like lines he's a robot
01:06:34.860 i think someone puts a big key in his back and churns it wait when you said he doesn't like
01:06:38.800 pivots that's the funniest thing i've ever heard imagine you're like you gotta stick to where it's
01:06:43.420 going if i have adhd in normal human conversation i pivot mid-word we haven't finished one thing
01:06:51.120 we brought up on this pod no for real not one nothing has been figured out not one we started 0.99
01:06:56.960 everything i literally couldn't believe it i was like no way and then he's like no he's a dumb 0.98
01:07:01.560 bitch like the problem though because then not that i ever watched his stuff like i'm like it's 0.97
01:07:06.460 not like ruining the art for me no me too but um yeah never crossed my desk but it's like sometimes 0.96
01:07:11.980 you meet someone and you can't appreciate the tv shows anymore because you know like the person
01:07:15.940 behind it same with comedy like you meet some comics and you're like that's not funny anymore 0.98
01:07:19.620 yeah like unfortunately i saw behind the curtains damn it that sucks damn it but yeah but then some 0.98
01:07:25.600 people you meet and you're like holy shit they're better than i thought or you're like thank god 0.99
01:07:29.240 thank god thank god they're awesome i had a feeling thank god i need it but it's it's real
01:07:34.940 i feel like people they say fame either like makes just exasperates i don't know if that's 0.90
01:07:40.100 the word just like you're more of what you were if you're an asshole you become a supreme i agree 0.98
01:07:45.300 if you're great then you could become like an angel yeah i literally told one of my friends 0.99
01:07:49.160 recently that i'm like i really do think to make it to a certain level you either have to be the
01:07:53.380 best person ever or the worst person i've ever fucking met because every really famous person 0.55
01:07:59.760 i've ever met is one or the other there's no in between and i think it's because you'll get 0.96
01:08:03.120 squeezed out you'll get choked out and i think because like normal people who are actually just
01:08:07.260 like they are living content with living good nice lives i agree instead of putting himself
01:08:14.220 through the chaos yeah exactly trying to be famous so it's only the strong or the evil survive 0.99
01:08:18.900 that's all that survives in hollywood like you're the strong as fuck or you're evil those are the 0.97
01:08:24.680 only two ways you get it and it's true like i was like it's so true because everyone i've met is 0.99
01:08:29.540 either awesome or i'm like i hope i never cross paths with you ever again like you're awful 0.99
01:08:34.580 and anyone in your circle sounds awful too like it's so and i take that shit so serious 0.99
01:08:39.460 and it feels like high school low-key because we like you talk to one person they all know 0.98
01:08:43.640 each other everybody knows everybody yes it's so strange yes but i do have more fun facts for you
01:08:48.200 oh yeah sorry i was trying to distract you oh this one this one says you used to be
01:08:51.940 community relations intern for the brooklyn nets was that it's so bad to your dad
01:08:57.340 well the the nets we the knicks suck so bad but like um the nets became brooklyn and i'm from
01:09:05.080 brooklyn whatever but yeah that was a really fun that was a fun job it was cool i i shout out to
01:09:09.960 the nets i love the nba they're fun to work with oh yeah you do stuff yeah i love that got me so
01:09:16.260 excited when i saw that because again love women and male dummy fields oh my god i know when they 0.99
01:09:20.540 were like why the fuck would you pick her i'll tell you why there's women on that team that's 1.00
01:09:25.500 why women on that team were like you want women to tune in you got to pick the one have you ever 1.00
01:09:29.500 been to a liberty game or like no i haven't i want to so bad though it's like being in a gay club 0.60
01:09:34.600 like well liberty has ellie which who's like the amazing i love ellie the elephant she's fully i 0.62
01:09:40.460 think she should win drag race like there's something going on but like it's all for um 0.88
01:09:46.280 not through the male gaze so it's crazy to see the whole the whole performance of it all like
01:09:50.300 they had these like 85 year old dancers come out and the whole thing i was like oh wait so much
01:09:55.480 for like what do we think the average 45 year old guy wants to see that's true that's what the nba
01:10:00.180 is the wmba they were like let's have fun girlies let's do whatever we want let's talk about our
01:10:05.140 feelings let's watch some basketball yeah so you have to go to wmb oh my god i'm so excited i went
01:10:09.900 to their all-star game oh that was years ago in arizona that was fucking awesome yeah um okay
01:10:15.440 this one says you got appendicitis in 2020 while filming an episode of bravo's chat room
01:10:20.240 oh my god Hannah that what happened to you there was okay so my first like talk show gig was this
01:10:28.460 show virtual show during COVID yeah I did it in my mom's kitchen like on a toaster oven
01:10:33.140 and like it was with Portia Williams Giselle Bryant Kate Chastain so much fun yeah I started
01:10:38.900 like a feeling of burning in my stomach which look I have stomach problems like if I had a nickel
01:10:44.460 right the amount of times I'd be like there's burning in my stomach and it's my fault I had
01:10:48.300 i ate something i shouldn't have eaten yeah but it was like burning and i remember like unzipping
01:10:52.780 my pants at one point being like oh my god this is bad this is bad and my mom is like type a yeah
01:10:58.480 so i look at her i'm like 29 30 years old at this point we finished the episode and i'm like i think
01:11:04.520 i have to lie down my stomach is burning and she goes i read about this it's appendicitis we gotta
01:11:08.620 take you to the hospital like that like you know a mom that's anxious but like for the perfect
01:11:13.320 reason yeah yeah like if she wasn't a psychopath and had been like searching all the ways her kid 0.85
01:11:17.880 could die she never would have been able to diagnose you and it also sucks because it validates 0.99
01:11:23.580 them doing that shit yeah my mom's like that too so my mom will keep doing it and i'm like then 0.99
01:11:28.240 she's like well i was right i'm like right but you still shouldn't she's like i don't like the 0.99
01:11:31.300 shade of your gum i think you gotta go to the hospital yeah you have something she's the one
01:11:36.200 who texts me just being like everyone is dying in you know maine because of a lettuce disease
01:11:40.660 right like i know you're in new york but it's coming down to you soon so don't eat salads for
01:11:45.320 the next eight months i was like i wasn't going to appreciate it so hey don't worry about that
01:11:49.480 with me okay last one it says the first time you ever saw your husband was when he got up and did
01:11:54.500 a stand-up set at the comedy cellar oh that actually is kind of a cute meet cute rom-com
01:11:59.060 that is cute i was like doing sales i was just a fan i never thought i would be a stand-up comic
01:12:03.800 yeah and i was just a fan with my co-workers and this guy got up and he's from queens new york
01:12:09.440 originally and he was funny and he said he lived in ireland and i was like oh i guess i'll never
01:12:13.780 yeah marry that guy yeah and i never saw him i just thought he was hot and i followed him and
01:12:17.300 then like five years later he saw me in the background of a nikki glazer instagram story
01:12:22.520 and followed me shout out nikki cousin love connection i do love nikki we love her we love
01:12:29.180 i mean she really held my hand at the beginning like she's amazing but um and then i i was like
01:12:35.900 on dating apps but he was above my age range but i was also crazy back then i was like my age range
01:12:42.080 was like up to 35 girls get it up girl get it up we want these experienced tired men
01:12:48.880 these young men right no girl don't even so they're just discovering looks maxing which is
01:12:56.100 them discovering that being beautiful works yeah we've been on that tip so i i've known that for 0.94
01:13:01.980 a fucking while any guy looks maxing is coming out to you right like it's it's genuinely like a
01:13:07.740 so man just discovered like pretty privilege but i do love using men's insecurities of their looks 0.99
01:13:14.340 to like monetize them oh you're telling me that's my whole platform sell him some fancy lotions
01:13:18.440 right no enough with the three-in-one conditioners like let's get every single part like right they're
01:13:24.080 too busy giving tips to women about things to fix like maybe you should look in-house true make sure
01:13:28.560 their own house is in order true true so yeah i um we ended up getting together even though i met
01:13:36.220 him four years later after that that's crazy but it was just doing research yeah just spotting
01:13:40.480 stuff early and the universe was like you're not ready yet yeah that's a good point i had work to
01:13:45.800 do on myself first and look at you we tried you saw him on that stage you said i'm gonna get i'm
01:13:50.340 gonna take that job match made in heaven i go he's gonna have to watch me do stand up 0.99
01:13:56.020 i'm gonna reverse that hoe i'm gonna ruin his life yeah i hope he's having fun for now yeah 0.99
01:14:03.360 enjoy your last few moments of joy well did you enjoy the fun facts were they fun that was so 0.99
01:14:08.680 fun oh my god i'm so glad i was amanda lives to see her job another day oh my god amanda good job
01:14:13.540 you killed it my last question for you for if you have any advice for any women who maybe want to
01:14:19.960 get into stand-up especially or even podcasting or even tennis yeah if there is someone who really
01:14:25.660 wants to get into entertainment and they want to like pursue it like what advice do you have for
01:14:30.000 that my advice is that be that x factor be yourself I think my stand-up connected with
01:14:38.520 people because I wasn't like watching what other people were doing I was just trying to like
01:14:43.200 focus on my stuff and I think when people are like you're unique you have your own voice no
01:14:48.100 no you're just being yourself and there's no one like you right so if you're sitting there being
01:14:51.680 like I'm not as good as that person or that person that person you're not those people
01:14:54.740 right you're you and your voice should be heard yeah so speak from your heart speak from your
01:14:58.820 stories and get out there and everyone's always nervous about like doing bad or bombing I'm like
01:15:05.240 the funniest part is when you say something that no one laughs then you're like oh that's where
01:15:08.540 you guys that's where you put like that's the funniest part where I'm like oh that's when we
01:15:12.300 got tight when I brought up my grandpa okay like just be honest everybody has standards of comedy
01:15:18.080 yes I was joking about poo poo for a second y'all were cracking up yes and I always think like I
01:15:23.360 know it's scary but you know it's scarier not going for what you want right or even ever finding
01:15:27.660 out it's true and i honestly think a lot of the times it's the fear of being perceived that with
01:15:33.000 like holds people back from even pursuing art forms like like stand up for example let's just
01:15:38.320 say you're being perceived regardless you might as well you might as well make money yeah right
01:15:42.840 maybe get a few yucks here and there maybe make some people laugh yeah being perceived makes you
01:15:47.660 feel alive right and everyone's just projecting their experiences onto you so it's cool right
01:15:52.460 and what people think about you like whatever you say sticks onto you and stick me that's the
01:15:58.360 quote and what people think about me is none of my business i was like that's for y'all not for me
01:16:02.920 period hulu january 5th none of my business let's go thank you so much for coming on the show
01:16:09.480 this was so much fun i love you too you're the best you're gonna punch a man now yeah and now 0.92
01:16:14.420 i'm now i'm getting now i'm mad at my husband now i'm gonna homewreck your home and then you're 0.64
01:16:20.400 gonna marry me for real but uh for everyone that the two people that maybe don't know uh where can 0.72
01:16:28.300 they find you and your special oh hannah burner and hulu is my second special yeah none of my
01:16:34.620 business and netflix was my first one look at you knocking them down one by one and you have a
01:16:40.860 podcast yes with page squad yeah squad um we love to giggle like drew amazing yeah and they do be
01:16:48.500 making me giggle oh thank you i'll be making me giggle i love it a lot to me thank you likewise
01:16:52.900 that i make you giggle period thank you all so much for tuning into this episode of the comment
01:16:56.820 section thank you so much to my amazing guest hannah burner you all already know who she is
01:17:00.440 and you all already follow her but if you don't make sure you do and you check out her new special
01:17:04.340 on hulu very exciting uh and thank you so much for tuning in don't forget new episodes of the
01:17:09.260 comment section drop every wednesday you can stream the audio on all streaming platforms
01:17:12.560 and the video is now on YouTube.
01:17:14.860 Wow, how exciting. 0.98
01:17:16.380 Thank fucking God. 0.99
01:17:18.000 We're free. 0.99
01:17:19.060 Y'all, we made it.
01:17:20.320 We did it, guys.
01:17:21.700 Anyways, thank you so much
01:17:22.600 to my amazing guest, Hannah.
01:17:23.520 Thank you so much to all of you
01:17:24.320 and I'll see you next week.
01:17:25.220 Bye.
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