The Golden One - December 12, 2014


Nord of Skyrim Chapter 5


Episode Stats

Length

24 minutes

Words per Minute

92.32982

Word Count

2,247

Sentence Count

300

Misogynist Sentences

31

Hate Speech Sentences

13


Summary


Transcript

00:00:00.000 Greetings to friends and proud sons of Skyrim! Thou art all very welcome back to the beautiful,
00:00:14.640 look this is a proper winter's day in good old Solstheim. So the last episode was a shorter one
00:00:23.760 and we just went into the realm of madness and now we're gonna talk to this true friend.
00:00:31.360 Greetings true friend. What's the crack? I spoke to Hermaeus Mora. Sickening. What a sick physique!
00:00:44.480 So he is the source of Yirak's power. Indeed he is. He explained it. He explained everything to us.
00:00:53.120 There are many tales of Hermaeus Mora trying to trick us into giving up our secrets to him.
00:01:00.640 And now he comes again for what we have long kept from him.
00:01:05.040 He said it's the only way he'll teach me the final word of Mirak's shout. Perhaps the shout is
00:01:19.440 GAINS! Like Robert Frank 615. That's a true friend right there. It's a cool YouTube channel.
00:01:28.960 But I know if I have the strength to face it. I can face him. I can knock him the fuck out.
00:01:34.800 With Mirak's corruption of the stones, the oneness of the land is disrupted and our connection to the
00:01:41.360 Old Maker is broken. As I said, I can... I'll do that for you and then I will knock Mirak out.
00:01:49.920 And I will think on what you ask of me to decide if it is necessary or just another of Hermaeus Mora's tricks.
00:01:59.920 Quite so indeed. Alrighty then. Look at this beautiful weather. Yeah, speaking of
00:02:07.600 good old Robert Frank that has a good YouTube channel right there for some quality videos.
00:02:15.360 Only reason his channel isn't bigger is simply because he doesn't make enough videos. You have to make a
00:02:21.360 video basically every day. Just keep it consistent. Like he makes quality videos but unfortunately not often enough.
00:02:28.960 But I'm subscribed to him. And when he um...
00:02:33.440 And when the world remembers, that world will cease to be...
00:02:39.920 No! I've become a slave!
00:02:41.920 But yeah, when he releases a video I'll be sure to watch it. What's this now?
00:02:50.400 What?
00:02:53.040 How dare you? Oh, perhaps you do it like this.
00:02:55.600 Oh! I am so silly. I thought of um...
00:03:07.520 Different things. Now...
00:03:09.200 What's it this perhaps? Might have been.
00:03:17.360 Ah, look at that! How glorious! Now let's fight this monstrosity that will erupt.
00:03:23.600 Come at me, bruh! Come at me!
00:03:26.000 Fight me!
00:03:33.920 Look at that block increased!
00:03:39.440 That, true friend, that is how you um...
00:03:42.080 Cleanse the sunstone. And also how you deal with large monstrosities.
00:03:48.960 Circlet of archery! How quaint! I um...
00:03:51.600 I appreciate that gift, dear old monster.
00:03:57.280 The beast stone.
00:04:01.200 They uh...
00:04:01.840 They tend to go beast mode at the beast stone. That's just what I heard.
00:04:05.440 What did you hear, Teddy?
00:04:07.920 Greetings!
00:04:10.080 That's also what Teddy heard.
00:04:12.560 So, good old Skyrim.
00:04:17.440 Still one of the top games.
00:04:21.520 That is why we are here right...
00:04:26.640 Right now.
00:04:29.440 And also we have Mount & Blade Viking Conquest.
00:04:35.760 Which will be nice.
00:04:37.280 But Skyrim will be the main thang.
00:04:39.520 Just because of the...
00:04:41.520 The sheer gloriousness of it.
00:04:44.000 Hello, beast stone!
00:04:45.200 You fuck juicy!
00:04:50.240 Oh, what's this then?
00:04:52.320 Oh, hello!
00:04:55.520 Oh, he wants to fight me!
00:04:57.520 Come at me, bruh!
00:05:00.400 Come at me, bruh!
00:05:01.920 Come at me, bruh!
00:05:03.520 Come at me, bro!
00:05:05.440 Come at me, bruh!
00:05:06.880 How dare you!
00:05:09.840 Shut your insolent...
00:05:12.160 mouth!
00:05:19.920 Do you know what I wish I had?
00:05:24.000 In this moment...
00:05:25.280 Okay, I wish I had a better bench press.
00:05:27.120 I mean, who doesn't?
00:05:29.520 I also wish I had some fucking healing potions.
00:05:34.800 I'm gonna utilize a quick save.
00:05:38.080 For the love of god!
00:05:39.040 And then I have no fucking stamina either.
00:05:47.600 Okay, I'm gonna engage power gaming mode.
00:05:49.680 Be right back.
00:05:50.480 All right, and fight me, you bastard!
00:06:01.280 All right, let us utilize a shout here.
00:06:05.120 I think that sounds like a good thing to do.
00:06:18.640 What in the actual fuck?
00:06:19.840 He didn't even...
00:06:23.200 He wasn't hurt at all by that.
00:06:24.560 I wish I had...
00:06:28.240 Perhaps these little midgets can help.
00:06:30.000 Greetings to your friend.
00:06:30.960 Can you...
00:06:31.600 Can you help me, perhaps?
00:06:35.440 Come on, then.
00:06:36.480 It's your...
00:06:37.120 It's your land as well.
00:06:38.080 Ah, look at that.
00:06:44.880 They actually do help me.
00:06:52.080 I must help my new friends.
00:06:57.840 Fuck.
00:06:59.920 Okay, a bit of a...
00:07:02.560 non-glorious...
00:07:05.120 way to solve this mission, perhaps.
00:07:06.880 But...
00:07:08.560 A juicy pale orc...
00:07:11.440 has to utilize whatever weapon he has in his arsenal.
00:07:15.840 Boom.
00:07:19.600 All right.
00:07:20.720 Fight me, then, you...
00:07:23.040 you insolent dog.
00:07:36.880 How dare he stand against me.
00:07:41.600 I'm gonna see what loot.
00:07:43.360 And I hope you all admire my block there.
00:07:45.360 And I know this, like, the seventh time I go on about my block.
00:07:49.760 But, um...
00:07:51.280 You know, if it's a good block, I mean, I have to give myself some credit.
00:07:57.280 Cleanse the earth stone.
00:08:00.400 Oh, we've actually already been here in the first episode when I said...
00:08:04.000 I think I said something along the lines of...
00:08:09.440 You fucking juicy!
00:08:11.600 I think, something like that.
00:08:16.080 Hello, mate.
00:08:16.880 Hello, gorgeous.
00:08:18.560 I don't know if she actually was gorgeous or not.
00:08:26.160 I just...
00:08:26.640 I just said that.
00:08:30.160 They're still blind, you fool.
00:08:32.400 Go on.
00:08:32.720 Now fight alongside me.
00:08:37.360 Fwaaa.
00:08:39.120 Oh, look at that!
00:08:48.560 And I need me some more stamina.
00:08:55.280 I mean, I need some more cardio up in this, uh...
00:08:59.040 Up in this.
00:09:00.880 For the love of god, I clearly blocked that.
00:09:10.320 Okay, I thought to swing for the fences, but, uh...
00:09:14.320 That obviously didn't work well enough.
00:09:17.280 Come on, I'm fighting me, coward.
00:09:19.920 Don't you stand there?
00:09:22.240 Oh, well.
00:09:23.280 Archer time.
00:09:26.160 For the love of Talos.
00:09:27.520 There are two, even.
00:09:29.440 True friends, help me.
00:09:32.320 Ah, come on!
00:09:38.240 For the love of god in heaven.
00:09:46.640 I'm gonna utilize the help of, um...
00:09:51.120 The...
00:09:51.520 The townsfolk.
00:09:53.360 Hello, friends.
00:09:54.160 Hello.
00:09:55.280 I'm sorry for bringing monsters into your city, but, um...
00:09:59.280 It's, uh...
00:10:00.400 It's cool.
00:10:00.880 It's fine.
00:10:04.160 Ah, fuck.
00:10:05.200 I hope they don't permanently die now.
00:10:11.840 Oh, cool.
00:10:21.680 They're only...
00:10:22.320 They only get knocked down.
00:10:32.560 Bye!
00:10:33.760 I'm not gonna stand toe to toe with those just yet.
00:10:46.880 Ah, how quaint.
00:10:47.600 Another archer.
00:10:49.840 But I do wonder where in the actual fuck the militia is at.
00:10:56.320 I'm not gonna do it.
00:11:01.200 Where indeed?
00:11:16.400 Oh, um...
00:11:19.920 How silly of me.
00:11:20.800 I'm...
00:11:24.320 Okay, cool.
00:11:25.360 Cool.
00:11:27.440 Thank you for that.
00:11:29.520 Thank you very much.
00:11:33.120 Ah.
00:11:36.560 Sickening.
00:11:37.760 We're actually gonna look what, if that, um...
00:11:41.040 That the ring was juicy enough for me to wear.
00:11:46.080 Do you even have a ring?
00:11:48.160 Ring of stamina?
00:11:49.440 Why?
00:11:50.880 Okay.
00:11:51.680 Cool.
00:11:53.280 Um...
00:11:54.240 Now.
00:11:57.520 Cleanse the water, stone.
00:12:06.320 Uh, okay.
00:12:08.160 Looks like we're gonna have to...
00:12:09.440 Look at my guns.
00:12:12.560 Fuckin' juicy.
00:12:13.760 I have to discover that place first and foremost.
00:12:16.960 So we get a little...
00:12:19.840 Some exploration time.
00:12:21.360 I'm...
00:12:22.640 Here in, uh...
00:12:25.840 In this mighty fine place.
00:12:28.240 I'm actually gonna do like this.
00:12:29.600 Shouts.
00:12:32.240 Whirlwind swing...
00:12:33.600 Sprint.
00:12:34.640 Whirlwind sprint.
00:12:36.560 There we go.
00:12:37.440 Brilliant english.
00:12:39.840 Oh, there's some...
00:12:41.120 Are there hunters up ahead?
00:12:43.280 Hello.
00:12:45.760 Juicy.
00:12:46.320 And what?
00:12:52.800 What?
00:12:53.200 What?
00:12:53.360 What?
00:12:53.920 Oh, it's one of those...
00:12:57.520 Floating...
00:13:00.560 Fangs.
00:13:01.440 Oh, it's bristlebacks.
00:13:09.440 I've had, um...
00:13:11.280 A few encounters with those and they are, um...
00:13:16.480 They're juicy enough, I suppose.
00:13:18.320 Ah, look.
00:13:22.080 We have, uh...
00:13:23.200 Found our place.
00:13:25.120 And now, it's just a matter of...
00:13:32.400 Releasing it.
00:13:34.400 Bendwill.
00:13:37.040 Murkwood, yes.
00:13:42.160 Oh, hello.
00:13:43.360 Hello, hello.
00:13:48.320 That is exactly...
00:13:57.280 How it goes, if you, uh...
00:14:00.880 If you try to do anything so foolish against me.
00:14:10.400 Oh, shit.
00:14:11.040 Here we go, true friends.
00:14:12.080 Here we go.
00:14:13.360 Let me adjust my lads before I...
00:14:16.800 Before we continue.
00:14:18.320 What do you mean you yield, you fucking coward?
00:14:30.960 Come at me.
00:14:37.520 Oh, perfect.
00:14:38.240 A fucking dragon as well.
00:14:41.040 Let's see if the dragon, perhaps, will slay the lurker.
00:14:44.000 How about that?
00:14:48.880 Ah, greetings, based dragon.
00:14:52.800 I, uh...
00:14:53.440 I appreciate your support.
00:14:54.640 What?
00:15:04.000 Yeah, I'm gonna do like this.
00:15:06.000 I have Reikling Spear as arrows, so I'm gonna change those to...
00:15:11.280 Orcish arrows.
00:15:12.080 Ah, you foolish demon, how dare you!
00:15:20.320 He didn't...
00:15:21.360 He didn't know that I actually had a true friend of the dragon bra all along.
00:15:25.200 I hope the dragon doesn't turn on me, though.
00:15:29.680 Oh, look at that.
00:15:49.920 Cleanse the water stone.
00:15:51.440 Ah, fuck.
00:15:54.800 I thought we were friends.
00:15:57.120 Why did you turn on me?
00:16:01.680 Dragon, come on now.
00:16:03.280 I was your friend all along.
00:16:04.400 I even helped you and stuff.
00:16:06.800 Oh, well.
00:16:11.840 Ah, and I don't want to fall down here.
00:16:14.400 It's fuckin' waterfall.
00:16:15.680 What have I done?
00:16:25.760 What is that?
00:16:26.080 What the f**k is about your license?
00:16:27.280 I won't leave you alive!
00:16:28.960 Ah!
00:16:29.440 Ah!
00:16:31.520 Ah!
00:16:31.920 Ah!
00:16:32.480 Ah!
00:16:32.960 Ah!
00:16:33.520 Ah!
00:16:33.920 Ah!
00:16:34.480 Ah!
00:16:34.960 Ah!
00:16:35.520 Ah!
00:16:36.080 Ah!
00:16:36.480 Ah!
00:16:36.960 Ah!
00:16:37.520 Ah!
00:16:38.000 Ah!
00:16:38.560 Ah!
00:16:38.960 Ah!
00:16:39.520 Ah!
00:16:40.000 Ah!
00:16:40.560 Ah!
00:16:40.960 Ah!
00:16:41.520 Ah!
00:16:42.000 Ah!
00:16:42.400 Ah!
00:16:42.960 Ah!
00:16:43.360 Ah!
00:16:43.520 Ah!
00:16:44.000 Ah!
00:16:44.360 Ah!
00:17:06.680 Okay, I'm just gonna make a run for it.
00:17:08.520 Went a bit quicker to kill the, uh, the blasphemous, um, um, the blasphemous, um, lurker though.
00:17:21.640 So, that's the key to defeating a lurker.
00:17:25.320 Oh!
00:17:26.120 Sidestep.
00:17:29.320 Slash sidestep.
00:17:31.720 How dare you!
00:17:36.200 Speaking of, uh, wild dogs, uh, last time I was in...
00:17:41.800 No dragon.
00:17:42.760 ...no dragon.
00:17:44.760 Ah!
00:17:45.160 For the love of god!
00:17:46.920 I don't even want to fight you!
00:18:00.040 Okay, I will commence telling my little story when I've actually out of reach for that dragon,
00:18:05.400 because I have no wish whatsoever, because I have no wish whatsoever to even be bothered.
00:18:11.480 Oh!
00:18:11.720 This is, uh, this place.
00:18:13.080 How quaint.
00:18:13.640 Now, can I finally fucking get out from this?
00:18:24.920 No, of course not.
00:18:28.040 Imagine if you see me gaming...
00:18:30.760 You know, let's play, and I, and I rage quit.
00:18:36.840 How about that?
00:18:37.400 Would that be a cool thing?
00:18:39.080 If I get totally mad and like, um, just rage, rage hard as fuck.
00:18:44.840 I wouldn't do that if I lose, because I'm not really a sore loser or anything,
00:18:49.800 but if things like this, when I just want to get on with a mission and a fucking dragon comes,
00:18:54.520 and also have the audacity to disrupt my story.
00:18:58.600 I'm speaking about two wolves.
00:19:00.840 Last time I was in Goodone, Ireland.
00:19:03.160 My fair maiden is from the countryside, so we visited her father,
00:19:09.560 and then you had to get, go out along the road to get water,
00:19:14.760 and then two fucking cheeky dogs came at us, and my fair maiden is ahead of me,
00:19:20.440 because he knows the way.
00:19:21.800 So I'm like taking three quick steps towards the dogs to get in between me and the fair maiden.
00:19:26.680 And then the dogs, like, get excited, because I come up against them,
00:19:31.480 so then they start to bark and stuff, and yeah, I got the adrenaline as fuck,
00:19:35.240 but they backed off.
00:19:36.600 They weren't big dogs or anything, I would say, like, tries their size, so,
00:19:40.760 uh, but still, cool.
00:19:43.160 So the dragons have returned.
00:19:45.320 They have.
00:19:46.440 Well, the skull have survived.
00:19:49.080 And the dogs are friendly, like, obviously.
00:19:51.320 Uh, after a while, they just growl and stuff, but, uh,
00:19:57.000 But with dogs, like, just, uh, if you back down, they will sense the weakness and get at you.
00:20:03.880 If you stand strong, they will just be intimidated, so.
00:20:08.600 True story.
00:20:11.400 You mean, you'll give him what he wants?
00:20:13.400 How do you know exactly what he wants?
00:20:15.080 Perhaps he wants something more, haha.
00:20:22.680 It was not their bodies that they were gonna give up, it was their secrets.
00:20:26.680 Sickening.
00:20:37.800 The secret of arm gains.
00:20:51.560 Herma Mora, the sick cunt.
00:20:55.720 All right.
00:20:58.680 Fair enough.
00:21:01.160 Now we wait, true friends.
00:21:10.440 How dare you talk to your father like that?
00:21:12.600 Against everything you have taught me my whole life.
00:21:15.080 Don't talk to him like that.
00:21:16.360 How dare you?
00:21:19.240 Yeah, speaking of things like that,
00:21:21.640 imagine that I'm walking here with my fair maiden at the street,
00:21:24.600 and then up ahead, like, a dodgy fellow is coming, then I place myself
00:21:29.640 between the dodgy fellow and my girl.
00:21:33.480 And girls will pick up on that kind of things as well, so it's an alpha thing to do, like,
00:21:37.720 get in between a potential danger and your fair maiden.
00:21:42.200 So, for example, if this father is a dodgy cunt, then you stand there.
00:21:49.480 But Freya is, uh, fucking solid as fuck, so she can take care of herself.
00:21:53.720 But still, like, girls, girls appreciate that kind of things.
00:21:56.280 The stars yield up their secrets to me.
00:22:06.920 Hello, old Herma Mora.
00:22:08.840 Have you been making some gains as of late?
00:22:11.080 Father!
00:22:11.640 No, stop!
00:22:13.400 No, stop!
00:22:18.520 Uh, this looks like something out of a Japanese comic, if you, if you know what I mean.
00:22:25.560 I'm talking about hentai.
00:22:27.800 Decadent, some decadent shit right there.
00:22:38.520 Hello!
00:22:38.840 I have indeed.
00:22:47.320 Now teach me the, the word.
00:22:50.520 Ah!
00:22:51.320 How about that, he honored us.
00:22:58.680 A prince of oblivion.
00:23:00.360 The word of power that you need to challenge Mirak the juicy.
00:23:10.440 All right, cool.
00:23:11.160 You will be either a worthy opponent or his...
00:23:15.960 Did we actually kill our, uh, our father-in-law?
00:23:23.480 How about that?
00:23:25.400 How about that?
00:23:27.800 Father!
00:23:28.360 Father!
00:23:29.320 What have you done?
00:23:32.920 At the summit of Apurkvrifa.
00:23:36.120 Go!
00:23:37.320 My father sacrificed himself so you could destroy Mirak.
00:23:40.600 All right, let's, let's fuck this cunt up.
00:23:43.560 Let us, uh, I will.
00:23:46.520 I will, fair maiden.
00:23:47.640 I will indeed.
00:23:49.720 Look at that.
00:23:50.920 Okay, cool.
00:23:51.640 That will have to conclude this juicy episode right here.
00:23:58.360 And who am I?
00:24:02.920 That's a secret.
00:24:03.720 I'll never tell.
00:24:04.440 XXO.
00:24:05.240 BOOM!
00:24:06.360 I'll never tell you.
00:24:16.280 Hull...
00:24:16.760 I'll never tell you.
00:24:17.080 I'll never tell the story.
00:24:17.880 I'll never tell the story minhs when it comes tobilisi.