The Golden One - September 07, 2014


Skyrim. The Cosy Episode


Episode Stats

Length

33 minutes

Words per Minute

94.32462

Word Count

3,124

Sentence Count

289

Misogynist Sentences

10

Hate Speech Sentences

16


Summary


Transcript

00:00:00.000 Welcome back to Skyrim, and this is actually the cozy episode. And to emphasize this fact, I have, look here, looks really nice, I have on my snuggle shirt.
00:00:24.500 My arms still look big and huge, my delts as well, and I can snuggle up a bit. And obviously, some coffee. If you haven't coffee, get yourself some tea, and let's just have a nice and relaxed time.
00:00:40.000 And the reason for this is, I just got the comment that there wasn't enough continuity to practice that word. And then I thought, like, okay, I can actually make a gameplay of some of the conversations in the game as well, to get that, you know, proper Elder Scrolls feeling.
00:01:06.000 Feel, I mean. We're on the internet here, after all. No, it's a feel, not feeling. We have a juicy maiden in front of us.
00:01:16.000 And let us yet again admire her Skyrim's beauty here.
00:01:30.000 Right, thanks for that, Faralda. Now we're gonna head in...
00:01:36.000 Fucking juicy tower as well.
00:01:38.000 Oh, Athalmor. Greetings, cheeky cunt.
00:01:43.000 Hall of the Elements.
00:01:46.000 Yeah, so if I actually were to study at any place, it would be this place.
00:01:52.000 Could've been anything.
00:01:58.000 Look at this gorgeous place. Oh, and we have a friendly librarian. Let us resume a civilized conversation with this fine gentleman.
00:02:13.000 Hello there, mate.
00:02:14.000 You are now in the Arcanium, of which I am in charge. It might as well be my own little plane of oblivion. Disrupt my Arcanium, and I will have you torn apart by angry Atronachs. Now, do you require assistance?
00:02:32.000 You see, that's a good man right there. He has proper respect for books. Same thing applies in my library. You must always respect books.
00:02:47.000 And I am looking for an Elder Scroll.
00:02:49.000 And what do you plan to do with it? Do you even know what you're asking about? Or are you just someone's errand boy?
00:02:57.000 Of course I do. Do you have one or not?
00:03:02.000 You think that even if I did have one here, I would let you see it? It would be kept under the highest security.
00:03:08.000 I'm Dragonborn.
00:03:09.000 The greatest thief in the world wouldn't be able to lay a finger on it.
00:03:12.000 Show some respect, damn you.
00:03:16.000 What about? Wait. Are you? Were you the one the Greybeards were calling?
00:03:21.000 Yes, I am.
00:03:22.000 I'll bring everything we have on them, but it's not much. So don't get your hopes up. It's mostly lies, leavened with rumor and conjecture.
00:03:37.000 Fight well.
00:03:38.000 That feel of being glorious, can you say? If I'm Dragonborn, then he showed some proper respect for me. Quite so indeed.
00:03:47.000 Alright, so...
00:03:52.000 There you go. Try not to spill anything on them.
00:03:55.000 Cheers, man.
00:04:00.000 Ruminations on the Elder Scrolls by Septimus Cygnus, College of Winterhold.
00:04:06.000 A glorious book right here.
00:04:15.000 I will take this.
00:04:19.000 And... Ah! Effects on the Elder Scrolls.
00:04:21.000 It is widely known among scholars that the Elder Scrolls entail a certain hazard in their very reading.
00:04:29.000 The mechanism of the effect has, at present, been largely unknown.
00:04:35.000 Theories of hidden knowledge and divine retribution were the subject of idle speculation with a little investigation.
00:04:44.000 You know what I could do? I could do, like, a video where I sit and read a book.
00:04:51.000 And then you can listen to that while you go to sleep.
00:04:56.000 My gentle voice.
00:04:59.000 Okay, cheers.
00:05:01.000 Urag.
00:05:03.000 I don't want to see you treating any of these books poorly. Are we clear?
00:05:08.000 Aye.
00:05:10.000 That's the work of Septimus Cygnus.
00:05:11.000 He was a mad cunt.
00:05:12.000 He's the world's master of the nature of Elder Scrolls.
00:05:16.000 But...
00:05:17.000 Well...
00:05:18.000 He's been gone for a long while.
00:05:21.000 Too long.
00:05:23.000 I know exactly where he went. He went to ice cave.
00:05:26.000 Somewhere up north.
00:05:27.000 In the ice fields.
00:05:29.000 He said he found some old Dwemer artifact.
00:05:32.000 But well...
00:05:33.000 That was...
00:05:34.000 Years ago.
00:05:35.000 I haven't heard from him since.
00:05:41.000 I will now find Septimus Cygnus.
00:05:46.000 We will head on out.
00:05:49.000 Oh, actually.
00:05:51.000 I forgot to ask this fine gentleman.
00:05:56.000 Hundreds of years have gone.
00:05:58.000 If you're feeling adventurous...
00:05:59.000 I do.
00:06:00.000 I'm always looking for someone to procure valuable books from some more dangerous locations.
00:06:05.000 I am ready indeed.
00:06:09.000 All right.
00:06:10.000 Here.
00:06:11.000 I scribbled down the last place I had heard about.
00:06:14.000 Check it out.
00:06:15.000 But be careful.
00:06:16.000 That is actually...
00:06:20.000 Would be a fun thing to do.
00:06:23.000 To go around adventuring.
00:06:26.000 And finding ancient hidden tombs of eternal knowledge.
00:06:31.000 That's something I could do.
00:06:33.000 Might be an archaeologist.
00:06:35.000 I don't know.
00:06:36.000 Okay.
00:06:37.000 Okay.
00:06:38.000 Elder knowledge.
00:06:39.000 Descending the transmindane.
00:06:43.000 Oh, he's up there.
00:06:45.000 Fast travel there, and then we'll run out into the ice.
00:06:49.000 fast travel there and then we'll run out on into the ice straight ahead you
00:07:03.460 know later on in the autumn when it at least here in Sweden and most most parts
00:07:10.480 of the northern hemisphere gets you know really dark and cold outside and then
00:07:17.360 we can all be snuggled up inside and I can run around in Skyrim and procure ancient
00:07:26.960 books with some warm beverages tea coffee some even some chocolate if you're
00:07:40.880 bulking oh how nice of me to manage that just fine so yeah let us run out to this
00:07:52.480 mad bastard oh this is harvest clam clam meat added and I have absolutely no idea about the macros of a
00:08:16.580 clam but I would guess that the protein content is somewhere around 20 because
00:08:22.640 that's like the standard amongst most meats
00:08:28.180 so yeah I'm doing a bit of a calmer session this day so we get to know my character a bit better
00:08:43.200 so I've actually been to the dawn gourd just activated the quest and stuff so I'll
00:08:50.920 actually acquire the crossbow there and I will do that storyline as well because I think that's one
00:08:58.120 of the coolest quests actually okay I'm always carrying too much there we see the crossbow
00:09:07.340 we're gonna equip that and favorite that walkish battle axe but we have our this one still so I'm
00:09:16.040 gonna throw this away kind of hurts do it but I'll be over encumbered can I I'm a good swim here in the
00:09:25.880 Arctic sea but as I'm a Nord I don't really feel cold even if I do feel cold I wouldn't I would not
00:09:38.120 admit to admit to it you can't admit the weakness than you are you're a little girl if you knew that
00:09:45.360 we have fight up here
00:09:47.860 the cave beer is the aggressor here so I'm gonna take the side of the walrosses
00:10:00.240 and I don't want to have a stand-up fight against this bear
00:10:17.480 I am actually not going to fight him at all the walrosses have to manage on their own now
00:10:36.500 goodbye bear see you later perhaps when I've leveled a bit and I'll come back and have my way with you
00:10:46.820 oh look a colony of they do not look too friendly actually might have been a mistake to help those to
00:10:58.640 to attack by the bear I don't know
00:11:01.860 so as I might have mentioned my character's name is Isgramor in honor of the ancient Nord hero
00:11:11.500 I really like the name as well
00:11:14.400 into the ocean boom I still have the imperial helmet and gonna see if we find anything juicier later on but
00:11:30.260 as of now I'm quite content with that that's pretty good stats as well and I'm actually I do try to
00:11:37.260 be a bit better I wasn't expecting to die that much when I started this let's play
00:11:44.800 all right so we're here Septimus Cygnus Outposts
00:11:50.780 yeah kind of a cozy place to to be as well to be honest I mean it's down in ice
00:11:58.940 hello hello hello love now we can't say that let's do that okay it's freaky
00:12:10.620 I'll know your lost unknown elder scrolls indeed the empire they have sconded with them
00:12:20.940 also they think the ones they saw the ones they thought they saw I know of one forgotten sequestered but I cannot go to it not poor Septimus
00:12:37.500 but please tell me then I have arisen beyond its ground
00:12:41.500 you mad bastard
00:12:43.500 here well here as in this plane Mondas Tamriel nearby relatively speaking on the cosmological scale well it's all nearby
00:12:59.500 okay I'm actually tempted to go with this because he kind of annoyed me I just want
00:13:07.740 to get it and slay some foul creatures and explore some cool ruins but I'm a
00:13:12.780 courteous man as I'm in in all my encounters
00:13:17.500 the other Septimus will give what you want but you must bring him something in
00:13:23.280 return name your demands name it you see this masterwork of the
00:13:28.940 I do deep inside their greatest knowings
00:13:33.900 Septimus is clever among men but he is but an idiot child compared to the dullest of
00:13:41.100 the Dwemer it might be true actually
00:13:43.420 lucky then they left behind their own way of reading the elder scrolls
00:13:48.780 in the depths of Blackreach one yet lies have you heard of Blackreach cast upon where
00:13:57.980 Drimmer city slept the yearning spire hidden learnings kept
00:14:02.940 where is this Blackreach
00:14:07.900 you blasphemous bastard
00:14:09.900 he thinks he's a good poet but I am no better
00:14:17.900 he's quite poor actually
00:14:19.900 delve to its limits
00:14:23.900 and Blackreach lies just beyond this is a really cool place we're going to
00:14:28.860 all can enter there really fucking juicy place
00:14:31.820 only Septimus knows the hidden key
00:14:33.820 to loose the lock to jump beneath the deathly rock
00:14:37.820 how do I get in
00:14:39.820 two things I have for you
00:14:41.820 two things
00:14:43.820 one edged one round
00:14:46.780 the round one for tuning
00:14:49.660 Dwemer music is soft and subtle
00:14:52.780 and needed to open their cleverest
00:14:55.820 indeed it is
00:14:56.780 and I'm all out of coffee
00:14:59.820 so we'll have to endure this rambling
00:15:02.780 we'll have to
00:15:04.780 imagine if you had
00:15:08.780 if you were in a hurry
00:15:10.780 to get it
00:15:12.780 because the world is going under
00:15:14.780 and then you have to hear him like
00:15:16.780 plattering on about nonsense
00:15:18.780 and then you can't really kill him
00:15:20.780 because you kinda need his knowledge
00:15:22.780 but
00:15:24.780 when I've gotten what I want
00:15:26.780 for his crimes
00:15:28.780 learn the location
00:15:30.780 map updated
00:15:32.780 ok we don't actually have to talk any more with this
00:15:34.780 with this bastard
00:15:38.780 proper bastard he is
00:15:40.780 let's uh
00:15:41.780 let's recover this Elder Scroll
00:15:42.780 and learn its secrets
00:15:44.780 open Skyrim
00:15:48.780 I'm gonna utilize the map here
00:15:50.780 see if we can
00:15:52.780 fast travel
00:15:54.780 trans
00:15:58.780 transcribed lexicon
00:16:00.780 Alftand
00:16:02.780 and
00:16:04.780 where is the closest
00:16:06.780 is it Dawnstar perhaps
00:16:10.780 no
00:16:12.780 we're gonna go with Winterhold
00:16:14.780 and uh
00:16:16.780 run around a bit more in the
00:16:20.780 disrespect the law
00:16:22.780 and you disrespect me
00:16:24.780 oh really
00:16:26.780 let's see about that
00:16:30.780 ok so we're gonna
00:16:32.780 follow this little road here
00:16:34.780 and
00:16:36.780 while we do this
00:16:38.780 we might actually admire the sky
00:16:40.780 really beautiful
00:16:42.780 we have a
00:16:46.780 little shrine up ahead
00:16:48.780 we have a
00:16:50.780 little shrine up ahead
00:16:52.780 could be nice to
00:16:54.780 investigate further
00:16:56.780 snowberries always nice to have
00:17:00.780 up
00:17:02.780 up
00:17:04.780 save
00:17:06.780 go fuck yourself
00:17:08.780 bye
00:17:10.780 bye
00:17:12.780 I hope
00:17:14.780 can outrun this bastard of a
00:17:16.780 snowy saber cat
00:17:18.780 we don't
00:17:20.780 don't want to fight him just yet
00:17:22.780 later on all the creatures
00:17:24.780 even dragons
00:17:26.780 mammals and giants
00:17:28.780 will land their place
00:17:30.780 which obviously is beneath my
00:17:32.780 11 feet
00:17:34.780 or north feet in this case
00:17:36.780 those snow rates are really
00:17:38.780 really hard to fight as well
00:17:40.780 they're really
00:17:42.780 agile and nimble so hard to hit
00:17:44.780 just gonna
00:17:46.780 check the map real quick
00:17:48.780 yeah we're kind of on the right
00:17:50.780 way perhaps we should go up in the
00:17:52.780 mountains but we can do that later
00:17:54.780 on
00:17:58.780 if i were the goat i would actually
00:18:00.780 run fast as hell as well
00:18:02.780 oh we got a cave
00:18:04.780 a little cave
00:18:06.780 don't see the entrance though
00:18:08.780 can you see it true friends
00:18:10.780 where the entrance to the cave is
00:18:12.780 no
00:18:16.780 because the thing with skyrim is that
00:18:18.780 you can't just let the
00:18:20.780 let oh another fucking counter
00:18:22.780 there
00:18:24.780 you know what we actually could do
00:18:26.780 we could do like this
00:18:28.780 shouts
00:18:30.780 whirlwind sprint
00:18:36.780 to escape those
00:18:38.780 kind of
00:18:40.780 unpleasant
00:18:42.780 encounters
00:18:44.780 to say the least
00:18:48.780 i think we would be closing
00:18:50.780 in
00:18:52.780 cold winter's night
00:18:54.780 there
00:18:56.780 in
00:18:58.780 northern skyrim
00:19:00.780 in
00:19:01.780 north
00:19:02.780 yskramor
00:19:06.780 and yeah
00:19:08.780 it actually looks like we have
00:19:10.780 reached our little
00:19:12.780 destination
00:19:14.780 north
00:19:16.780 north
00:19:18.780 north
00:19:20.780 and
00:19:22.780 the
00:19:24.780 north
00:19:26.780 and
00:19:28.780 north
00:19:30.780 north
00:19:31.780 and
00:19:32.780 north
00:19:34.780 and
00:19:36.780 I half remember I've been here before and I had a bit of a hard time to really find the place,
00:19:47.660 but I assume... oh look! It was a bit easier this summer! Okay, so that wasn't actually that
00:19:57.420 long of a run. I thought I'd maybe edit the video in afterhand, but it's nice to just run around in
00:20:08.300 nature as well, so you get a good feel for the character and for the mission. Scroll of Mayhem!
00:20:18.460 Ooh, a gold sapphire ring. Yes, thank you to both of them.
00:20:29.900 Okay, so we're gonna exercise some caution. I'm gonna utilize a save day.
00:20:37.020 And I'm ready to get ambushed at any moment now. I'm actually gonna bring up my sword instead.
00:20:48.700 It's two Khajiits having a go at each other for some...
00:20:55.820 They're trying to double-cross each other as they are the way with those sneaky semi-cats.
00:21:06.300 Common soul, that's nice. You can utilize that in some good old enchanting later.
00:21:18.460 Okay, where are you, Khajiit bros?
00:21:25.820 Research notes. I'm actually gonna read the first passage here.
00:21:31.900 If only Umani would have left one of these dwarven machine creatures intact for me to study.
00:21:37.900 The fact that they almost killed those Khajiit brothers in the middle of the night doesn't mean we
00:21:42.540 couldn't have found a way to disable one. We dragged some stuff in front of the pipes.
00:21:48.860 They came out of to stop them from coming back.
00:21:56.700 Well...
00:22:00.220 Oh, there we are.
00:22:01.180 Oh, first of all.
00:22:06.780 And as you can see, I'm utilizing my longer reach there, so it's quite easy to handle when you
00:22:16.140 have a two-handed Claymore. I'm actually gonna save the...
00:22:22.460 So we have the power Battlecry, but I'm gonna save that and we're gonna use Unrelenting Force.
00:22:28.860 I don't really need it for this little boss here.
00:22:36.060 As you can see, I can actually just back and hit.
00:22:44.540 So I don't have to use any of that blocking I'm so fucking poor at either way.
00:22:53.260 Alright, so we have two options here.
00:22:55.100 Oh, this was just a bloodbath. What has happened here on my desk?
00:23:01.420 Some trinkets.
00:23:04.300 Right, we're heading...
00:23:13.260 We're heading on down...
00:23:14.940 This highly glorious place, I would say.
00:23:26.140 Yes, it is. Come at me.
00:23:35.340 I can't believe how much he can take. Like, it's really...
00:23:44.940 Okay, so I actually pushed the wrong bottom.
00:24:01.260 I don't really know what happened.
00:24:02.700 I'm gonna kill this Khajiit right now.
00:24:10.540 I'm gonna utilize some potions.
00:24:14.860 Minor healing.
00:24:17.500 Frostbite Venom, you can actually utilize that.
00:24:20.860 Potion of the Warrior can't really help us now because we're not one-handed.
00:24:24.540 That was actually one of the coolest killing moves I have...
00:24:42.940 I've said, I haven't seen. I mean...
00:24:47.100 Really cool. So thank you for that, Isidar.
00:24:49.500 Thank you for, uh... Oh, here's his brother.
00:24:55.260 Plenty of healing.
00:24:57.340 Thank you for that.
00:24:59.660 Much appreciated.
00:25:07.500 Okay, so, uh...
00:25:14.540 I would assume that we will get ambushed.
00:25:19.500 I would assume that we will get ambushed.
00:25:22.860 Now!
00:25:29.820 I was new to that.
00:25:31.500 I didn't even remember that at all.
00:25:33.500 How silly of me.
00:25:40.940 Okay, so how to combat one of those?
00:25:44.940 First of all, we will be ready for it.
00:25:50.220 We can actually...
00:25:53.020 Use a...
00:25:55.340 different...
00:25:58.380 Okay, so there he is.
00:26:01.820 Of course, I probably missed it as well.
00:26:03.500 Okay, I have a run.
00:26:16.540 And we'll see if we can outrun this bastard.
00:26:19.660 I don't want to fight him because I think I'll actually lose that.
00:26:24.060 Oh, another of those cunts.
00:26:31.820 Unlocate novice.
00:26:34.860 I wouldn't really have time for this, but, um...
00:26:37.980 It can be cool to level into lockpicking a bit.
00:26:40.940 Adept!
00:26:41.820 Okay.
00:26:46.860 Kind of a wrong...
00:26:49.180 Wrong time to do this, but, um...
00:26:53.820 Let's...
00:26:55.340 Let's try it.
00:26:55.980 Okay, I have a good old good dude lockpicks left.
00:27:12.380 Oh well, fuck that.
00:27:18.460 And where in the actual fork am I going?
00:27:25.980 I don't even know where I'm going.
00:27:29.020 Seems to be...
00:27:30.540 Okay, let's look at the...
00:27:34.540 Okay, so out into the...
00:27:38.620 This should be up there somewhere.
00:27:41.580 I can't really see how to...
00:27:46.140 How to get there, where I missed it.
00:27:49.180 And I ran away from that bastard.
00:27:52.700 Okay, so it's not out today.
00:27:55.980 So...
00:27:57.820 Okay, so it's actually back and to the left.
00:28:14.780 Always when I die, I have to flex my guns to, um...
00:28:18.860 To keep me from getting sand.
00:28:23.580 Alrighty then.
00:28:29.020 Now we consult the map.
00:28:31.020 So it's actually...
00:28:32.220 Oh!
00:28:32.780 I can look for the light to see where I'm going.
00:28:41.580 But...
00:28:45.260 That will have to...
00:28:46.220 So it's actually in here.
00:28:58.460 We have a little chest here as well.
00:29:00.060 Steal Battle Axe of Burning.
00:29:10.700 Increase my Magicka.
00:29:12.220 Can be quite good.
00:29:14.620 See, now I actually have...
00:29:16.140 Prices are better.
00:29:20.940 And that's better.
00:29:23.980 Oh, I wasn't wearing that.
00:29:25.260 That's strange.
00:29:27.980 No, my current weapon is actually a bit better.
00:29:30.540 So I'm gonna go with that.
00:29:32.700 Consulting map.
00:29:33.500 I'm just gonna run on and see where we...
00:29:38.140 Where we end up.
00:29:44.700 Okay, I'm actually gonna have to fight these spiders.
00:29:50.300 So I will actually...
00:29:59.180 Okay.
00:30:03.500 A bit of a terrible kill there as well.
00:30:23.260 Close call.
00:30:25.020 Close call indeed.
00:30:26.860 Iron ore.
00:30:28.140 Nice.
00:30:33.500 Nice.
00:30:35.580 Next character...
00:30:36.620 Character I make...
00:30:38.780 Could either be a Battle Mage...
00:30:40.540 So I can run around...
00:30:43.100 Healing myself all the time.
00:30:44.620 Or...
00:30:45.500 It could actually be...
00:30:48.220 A sneaky...
00:30:49.740 Sneaky Wood Elf or a Deep or anything like that.
00:30:53.740 Make me sneak around...
00:30:56.220 Cheeky as fuck.
00:30:58.220 But I really like my two-handed...
00:31:01.180 Martial prowess.
00:31:03.500 And I especially like...
00:31:12.300 When I can kill them...
00:31:14.140 Before they actually reach me.
00:31:23.420 Hmm.
00:31:25.020 We have found our place.
00:31:26.380 Alftand...
00:31:27.580 Animo...
00:31:30.140 Something.
00:31:32.300 Couldn't read the rest.
00:31:37.420 Oh-ha!
00:31:39.020 I see.
00:31:39.660 We hadn't...
00:31:42.300 Killed him yet.
00:31:43.100 Let's see.
00:31:49.420 Right.
00:31:49.660 Might actually be...
00:31:51.980 An...
00:31:54.860 A good idea to...
00:31:57.740 I'm gonna put that on three and that on four.
00:32:00.300 Or...
00:32:03.900 Uh...
00:32:04.220 Yeah.
00:32:04.700 Could be an ID to fight those guys.
00:32:07.020 But...
00:32:09.420 Let us not.
00:32:10.300 Let us kill this little spider.
00:32:12.780 Because we might die off-road.
00:32:19.900 I'm gonna let us kill this little spider.
00:32:24.380 A good idea.
00:32:27.100 My hands are bloody.
00:32:28.140 I like that.
00:32:32.300 All right.
00:32:32.700 So I'm actually gonna do it like this now.
00:32:34.780 To keep this episode from getting...
00:32:38.700 Brutally long.
00:32:40.620 I will cut it right here.
00:32:42.140 And then I will...
00:32:43.420 Continue from this exact...
00:32:45.900 Spot in the...
00:32:46.940 In the next episode.
00:32:50.620 It seems like, um...
00:32:52.620 A rather good idea, to be honest.
00:32:55.500 And who am I?
00:32:59.260 I'm the glorious...
00:33:02.860 Two-handed master of peace.
00:33:05.580 XOXO.
00:33:06.220 Boom!