The Joe Rogan Experience - Joe Rogan Experience #622 - Adam Carolla

00:00:00.000 Ladies and gentlemen, Adam Carolla's here! 1.00

00:00:04.000 Dude, you do too much shit. 1.00

00:00:05.000 I do too much shit, but you do too much shit compared to the shit that I do. 1.00

00:00:09.000 You just did a fucking movie? 1.00

00:00:11.000 How do you have time to do a movie? 1.00

00:00:12.000 You do 85 podcasts, you do a TV show on Spike, you got a family, growing a beard, drive cars.

00:00:19.000 The beard's the easiest part, but keep going.

00:00:22.000 Beards and pubes.

00:00:24.000 You do stand-up comedy, you do live podcasts. 1.00

00:00:26.000 What the fuck, dude? 0.99

00:00:28.000 Well, you know, a couple things. 0.99

00:00:33.000 I started to realize, after I had my twins, that what I did was radio, podcasting, but I felt like it was all just floating up into the ether, you know?

00:00:46.000 And I thought, I want some sort of permanent record, like some sort of legacy.

00:00:51.000 You know, books, movies, the stuff that gets passed around. 0.79

00:00:55.000 You know, what I'm saying is, over Christmas time, me and my eight-year-old twins, we watch planes, trains, and automobiles and love the shit out of it.

00:01:06.000 And that movie's like 30 years old now. 0.99

00:01:09.000 Great fucking movie. 1.00

00:01:10.000 It's a great fucking movie, but you want to feel old. 1.00

00:01:12.000 It's like, how long's John Candy been dead? 0.99

00:01:14.000 Like six years?

00:01:15.000 No, 15 years or 20 years.

00:01:17.000 But the point is, that thing and John Hughes, too.

00:01:22.000 So, we weren't listening to, you know, Ass Crack and Backsack in the morning from 1984. We were watching a movie from that era.

00:01:34.000 And I just sort of had this feeling at a certain point, like...

00:01:38.000 I like doing the podcast.

00:01:39.000 I like doing radio and TV shows and stuff like that.

00:01:42.000 But doing a movie, for some reason, those are the ones that get passed on versus the podcast.

00:01:50.000 And look, I'm sure someone long after we're gone are going to be listening to our archives.

00:01:56.000 But not with the eight-year-olds.

00:01:59.000 Right.

00:02:00.000 No, definitely not with their eight-year-olds.

00:02:01.000 And they might be listening to our archives, or our archives might all be lost out in the ether.

00:02:06.000 That's possible, too.

00:02:07.000 That's kind of what...

00:02:09.000 I felt like all I ever did was talk, and all it ever did was just float up and just go up into the atmosphere and blow away.

00:02:18.000 That's interesting.

00:02:19.000 Or maybe into Canada and cause some acid rain.

00:02:21.000 So that was really your motivation, was just to leave a solid legacy?

00:02:25.000 I was just like...

00:02:28.000 I really, it was two things for me in movies.

00:02:31.000 It was a whole bunch of people sort of saying, well, you can't do movies, you do radio.

00:02:36.000 You're a radio guy.

00:02:38.000 Or, you know, you can't do this.

00:02:40.000 Just, for me, not saying you can't, but not being taken seriously, like, you can go do this.

00:02:47.000 And then the other thing is, like, I had an idea for a movie, which I don't have that often.

00:02:52.000 But when I have an idea, I want to execute the idea.

00:02:55.000 Right.

00:02:56.000 You're probably wired that way.

00:02:58.000 Yeah.

00:02:58.000 Yeah, once I have...

00:03:00.000 It's almost like, yeah, you get like a seed is growing, it starts poking out through the dirt, and you're like, all right, we got to do something here.

00:03:05.000 This is moving.

00:03:07.000 Right.

00:03:07.000 So I made a movie called The Hammer like eight years ago, and I didn't make any more movies.

00:03:12.000 And then I had this idea like two years ago, and I was like, let's do it.

00:03:16.000 And The Hammer was about a boxer, right?

00:03:18.000 Yeah, The Hammer was about a boxer, and this is more about...

00:03:21.000 Road Hard is more about just comedians and the road and getting old and how the road is getting old for a lot of these guys.

00:03:31.000 Because I started seeing all these guys passing through my studio.

00:03:35.000 Like, you see him too, right?

00:03:37.000 And they're like going, hey, he's going to be down at Hilarity's in Addison, Texas.

00:03:41.000 And that's one show, and then two Friday, two Saturday.

00:03:44.000 And then he'd go like, yeah, I've got to blow in a day early to do local radio.

00:03:48.000 And you'd think to yourself, God, I used to watch that guy in Living Color.

00:03:52.000 Or I used to watch that guy on a sitcom or something.

00:03:55.000 And now he's back.

00:03:57.000 On the road.

00:03:58.000 And I know he ain't happy about it, but he's on the road.

00:04:02.000 And I just kind of want to tell that story about taking a step backward in life.

00:04:06.000 So the story's about a guy who's a sitcom actor who has to do stand-up again to make a living.

00:04:11.000 Got divorced, worked right up.

00:04:14.000 It all became reality shows.

00:04:16.000 You know, you remember that?

00:04:19.000 Holding deals, development deals, free money.

00:04:22.000 They don't exist anymore, right?

00:04:23.000 No, those deals, you know, those deals, I mean...

00:04:29.000 As soon as Roseanne and Seinfeld and Tim Allen and Ray Romano had success doing sitcoms, Hollywood was like, who's the next Ray Romano going to be?

00:04:43.000 And so they started bringing guys in and throwing tons of cash at them just to spitball ideas and just whatever.

00:04:50.000 And so the guys immediately got off the road because they're like, screw that, I'm moving to Hollywood.

00:04:56.000 And some of them had some success.

00:04:58.000 Some of them had some difficulties in marriage, rehab, things like that.

00:05:03.000 The point is, is now they're all knocking on the door of 50, divorced, and ready to hit the road again.

00:05:11.000 They don't want to hit the road, but how else are you going to make a living?

00:05:15.000 It's all reality.

00:05:17.000 It's all reality show.

00:05:19.000 Interesting.

00:05:19.000 So this idea got in your head because of dealing with all these people that come into your studio.

00:05:23.000 No.

00:05:24.000 I mean, yes.

00:05:25.000 It was a combination.

00:05:27.000 No, I started seeing, like...

00:05:30.000 You know that thought where the guy's explaining the club he's going to, and you're like, I know that club. 0.94

00:05:35.000 And then your next thought is, that's kind of a shitty club.

00:05:39.000 And then you think, wait a minute, this guy's kind of a name. 0.80

00:05:42.000 Like, this guy's a little bit of a household name. 0.98

00:05:44.000 Why is he playing that shitty club? 0.52

00:05:47.000 And then you start feeling sort of bad for him, even though you shouldn't, because Roofer... 0.97

00:05:54.000 Cop, fireman, all real jobs versus going to hilarities and getting paid for, you know, standing up on stage and holding a beer in your hand.

00:06:03.000 But you're feeling bad for this guy because you know he doesn't really want to go there.

00:06:08.000 And you know he has other friends.

00:06:11.000 You know, I'd have Dave and Alan Greer say, I've got to go to Addison, Texas.

00:06:14.000 And I know Jamie Foxx doesn't have to go to Addison, Texas.

00:06:18.000 Right.

00:06:19.000 And at some point, he was probably...

00:06:23.000 Telling Jamie Foxx, here's how comedy works, brother.

00:06:26.000 Sit down.

00:06:27.000 You know what I mean?

00:06:29.000 So it was telling the story of stepping backwards.

00:06:35.000 And for me, you know, I had to live it myself.

00:06:41.000 I lived that story in 2009, when I got fired from my radio job, there were no jobs.

00:06:53.000 There was no radio jobs, and there was no television jobs, as far as I could tell.

00:07:00.000 I mean, the phone wasn't ringing.

00:07:02.000 And I had young twins, and I just had to hit the road.

00:07:08.000 And I didn't have an act.

00:07:10.000 All I had was, Adam Carolla is coming to your town, and that was good enough to sell a few tickets, and I was just coming to your town.

00:07:17.000 And I just told the booker, you know, wherever, whenever, how many shows, doesn't matter, I'm there.

00:07:25.000 Wow.

00:07:26.000 And I spent a year being, like, humbled.

00:07:30.000 That was six years ago.

00:07:31.000 That's not that long ago.

00:07:32.000 No, it's not that long ago.

00:07:34.000 And it was a lot of Southwest flights and Red Roof Inns and a lot of, like, I didn't know the road.

00:07:40.000 So I didn't know about, well, you get an opener so you don't have to do a full 90-minute set or whatever.

00:07:45.000 I was doing three 95-minute sets in a row.

00:07:48.000 By yourself?

00:07:49.000 Just by myself.

00:07:50.000 You're doing three shows on Friday?

00:07:51.000 Like, that kind of deal?

00:07:52.000 It's three shows on Saturday?

00:07:55.000 When I started to really like...

00:07:58.000 started to crack...

00:08:03.000 Our gig was we're going to book a night at Cobb, Thursday night at Cobb's in San Francisco.

00:08:10.000 It's a pretty good-sized club.

00:08:12.000 So Thursday night, you know, it's like, I don't know, 500 seats or something.

00:08:15.000 So we said, Thursday night, we'll do a show in Cobb's.

00:08:18.000 Then we'll go to Kirkland, Washington, and we'll do two shows Friday, two shows Saturday.

00:08:22.000 I said, all right.

00:08:24.000 So I get the call.

00:08:25.000 Oh, the first show is sold out.

00:08:26.000 You want to add a second show?

00:08:28.000 Oops, second show added.

00:08:31.000 Sold out.

00:08:32.000 You want to add a third show.

00:08:33.000 Now, I know that third show is going to be miserable, but I'm only going to San Francisco to try to get some money and bring it back.

00:08:43.000 And the nicer the flight and the nicer the hotel, the less money that comes back.

00:08:48.000 And I used to say to someone, look, I'm just going to wake up Friday morning in San Francisco one way or the other.

00:08:54.000 If I do one show, two shows, or three shows, at some point I'm going to wake up that next day and I'll just be in a hotel bed.

00:09:01.000 Might as well have an extra whatever amount of grand in my pocket.

00:09:06.000 Just go for it.

00:09:08.000 So I did it.

00:09:10.000 And then the same thing happened in Kirkland, Washington.

00:09:14.000 Three shows, first show, second show, third show.

00:09:16.000 They all sold out, so they kept adding them.

00:09:18.000 And before you knew it, I was like disoriented, like up on stage.

00:09:23.000 And I thought 90 minutes was the minimum amount I could do.

00:09:28.000 So I'd do like 95, 100 minutes a show, and I didn't know about the opener.

00:09:33.000 Or the local guy or the anything.

00:09:35.000 So you never brought anybody with you at all?

00:09:36.000 No.

00:09:37.000 See, the problem with the road, when you do that, it gets really lonely.

00:09:41.000 It gets weird.

00:09:42.000 Well, I always had Mike August with me, who was booking all the stuff and was...

00:09:48.000 You know, it was fun to see him in the green room eating every time, to see what he ate.

00:09:52.000 You know, just the remnants of what he ordered.

00:09:54.000 Like, oh, is that the mozzarella sticks or the chicken fingers, Mike?

00:09:57.000 But I got them both.

00:09:58.000 He'd just be watching college football the whole time on the sofa that's way too big for the room that it's in.

00:10:03.000 Right.

00:10:04.000 But we just went for it.

00:10:06.000 Like, that was it.

00:10:07.000 So I got this weird crash course on the road, you know, at age 43 or 44. And I was like, wow, man, this is rough.

00:10:20.000 I mean, it would have been cool at 27. Yeah.

00:10:23.000 Single and whatnot.

00:10:24.000 Well, it's also you didn't have an act.

00:10:26.000 So you just have some ideas that you would just talk about on stage for 90 minutes?

00:10:32.000 How did it go?

00:10:34.000 It went surprisingly well.

00:10:37.000 They're happy to see you.

00:10:38.000 They're happy to see me, but that's not going to last 95 minutes.

00:10:41.000 You had some ideas.

00:10:43.000 You must have had some stuff you were planning on talking about when you got up there.

00:10:46.000 What I would do is I would...

00:10:48.000 The first, like, hour or 45 minutes or something would just be, what can Adam complain about? 0.99

00:10:55.000 And people would just shout out shit from the audience. 0.97

00:10:58.000 And I would have to riff on it, but... 0.98

00:11:01.000 It would be kind of a calorie burner because you'd have to, you know, come up with this material.

00:11:07.000 And then my head would start swimming.

00:11:10.000 Like, did I do this already?

00:11:11.000 I couldn't remember if I did it in first.

00:11:12.000 The guy yelled out kittens.

00:11:14.000 Did he yell that in this show or is that the third show or the second show?

00:11:17.000 Like, start floating a little up there.

00:11:20.000 But eventually...

00:11:23.000 What I would do is, you know, I'd walk through Kirkland, Washington, and I'd see, oh, they have little flags that they use that go in a little receptacle, and when you cross the street, even at a signal in a crosswalk, you hold the little flag up.

00:11:38.000 And then you go set it back down in the receptacle on the other side of the street.

00:11:42.000 Everybody does that?

00:11:44.000 Well, they provide them for everybody.

00:11:46.000 What?

00:11:47.000 Like you have to have a flag to cross the street?

00:11:49.000 You're not going to get penalized by it.

00:11:51.000 It's just a courtesy that the town of Kirkland, Washington offers.

00:11:55.000 What's the benefit of the flag?

00:11:57.000 You not being run over?

00:11:59.000 Well, they don't see you if you don't have a flag?

00:12:02.000 You're more visible.

00:12:04.000 Well... 1.00

00:12:06.000 What the fuck? 1.00

00:12:06.000 What the fuck is wrong with your eyesight up in Corkland? 1.00

00:12:09.000 How cloudy is it up there? 0.99

00:12:11.000 I'm saying, however visible Joe Rogan is, he's at least 35% more visible with an orange flag over his head.

00:12:20.000 Wow.

00:12:21.000 How bizarre.

00:12:22.000 What prompted that?

00:12:24.000 I don't know, but there's my first 15 minutes.

00:12:26.000 Oh, yeah.

00:12:27.000 I could see you going on for an hour about that.

00:12:29.000 Yeah, so I would blow into every town and just look around with a buck slip and go, like, flying over there.

00:12:36.000 Okay, what's going on?

00:12:37.000 And by the half of it was, oh, the Alaskan Airline flight out here.

00:12:41.000 You know, just anything.

00:12:43.000 Just anything.

00:12:44.000 And then once I hit the stage, I could riff on it.

00:12:47.000 But after, you know, obviously...

00:12:52.000 After what started happening is then, you know, next week in Phoenix, I'd go, you guys got a nice town, but let me tell you about Kirkland, Washington.

00:13:00.000 They got flags to cross, you know, and then I could do the same 10 minutes again.

00:13:05.000 Right.

00:13:05.000 And that's how the act was built during the course of the experience on the road.

00:13:13.000 There's a lot of guys who wind up doing that that are sitcom actors that wound up Doing stand-up after they became a sitcom actor, like Screech from Saved by the Bells, particularly famous for it.

00:13:24.000 Well, yeah, it just got a name.

00:13:25.000 Yeah.

00:13:26.000 Yeah, Danny Bonaduce would do an act.

00:13:28.000 It's just like, you don't have an act, but you do have a currency.

00:13:32.000 The currency is we recognize your name on the marquee.

00:13:36.000 Yeah.

00:13:37.000 So folks who weren't formally stand-ups are now going to have to be stand-ups if they want to eat.

00:13:44.000 Yeah.

00:13:45.000 Yeah.

00:13:45.000 Do you remember Skippy from Family Ties?

00:13:47.000 Sure.

00:13:47.000 He used to do that.

00:13:48.000 Skippy from Family Ties, like, when I was first starting out, he was hitting the road.

00:13:53.000 Skippy, though, I mean, to give the Skippy his due, he was doing it, like, when he was doing it.

00:14:02.000 While the show was going on, he was doing it?

00:14:03.000 Even before or after?

00:14:05.000 I mean, somebody can research this, but I remember doing...

00:14:10.000 Two things.

00:14:11.000 I remember doing an open mic at the Improv, the Melrose Improv, about, you know, 1985, maybe 1986, and Skippy was there.

00:14:24.000 So, it wasn't like, oh, that show got cancelled and now he's trying his hand at stand-up.

00:14:29.000 Like, he was banging away at it.

00:14:30.000 And I also think the guy went up missing.

00:14:33.000 Recently and maybe dead went out in like the wilderness and like killed himself Someone's gonna have to do some skippy research I think you might be confusing skippy with the guy who killed the the development deal that we were talking about earlier Chicken, do you know that story?

00:14:49.000 No, you don't know what killed the development deal.

00:14:51.000 No there Montreal especially the Montreal Comedy Festival was this big event Where all the industry would go there, and it was really kind of an excuse to go drink.

00:15:02.000 Been there.

00:15:03.000 They would go and have a great time, but they would hand out these development deals, and some of them were pretty big.

00:15:09.000 And a really big one was given to this guy that called himself Chicken.

00:15:14.000 Chicken was a young, cute guy, and he would go wacky on stage, sort of Jim Carrey-esque.

00:15:22.000 Less aware of the industry.

00:15:25.000 Like, you know those people that you talk to and they're just kind of, they're kind of like metal filings getting pulled towards the magnet.

00:15:32.000 They don't necessarily have their own compass.

00:15:34.000 They don't necessarily have their own opinion on things that they formulated.

00:15:38.000 They might be young.

00:15:39.000 They might be impressionable.

00:15:41.000 But they kind of go with, oh, he's amazing.

00:15:42.000 He's so talented.

00:15:44.000 He's so good.

00:15:45.000 You should see his energy.

00:15:46.000 It's incredible.

00:15:47.000 Ralph had about a million people, and then you meet the guy, or you see his act, or you're whatever, and you're like, what am I missing?

00:15:54.000 This was that times a hundred. 0.98

00:15:57.000 This was like every comic, I mean every comic, was like, what the fuck? 0.96

00:16:02.000 Like, you'll get comics that'll defend the most undefendable, you know, you mean there's a lot of comics that, you know, love all sorts of weird marginal acts, but this guy was off the charts. 0.97

00:16:12.000 Off the charts bad.

00:16:13.000 Off the charts bad, but...

00:16:15.000 Got a giant development deal, like a half a million dollars.

00:16:18.000 Right.

00:16:18.000 And it just went south.

00:16:20.000 He came to Hollywood, can't act, can't do anything, started bombing.

00:16:23.000 They realized, like, what did we do? 0.97

00:16:25.000 We gave a half a million dollars to a crazy person.

00:16:27.000 And literally, that was the end of the development deal.

00:16:30.000 It just stopped with this one guy.

00:16:32.000 He wound up hanging himself in front of a school somewhere.

00:16:36.000 That's the urban myth.

00:16:38.000 Oh, really?

00:16:39.000 Urban legend, rather.

00:16:40.000 I'm not sure if that's actually exactly that, but I know he killed himself.

00:16:43.000 Somebody's gonna have to...

00:16:44.000 Well, you know, I was saying the other day, you know, I think second only to cops in suicide, comedians might be number two in the suicide department.

00:16:56.000 I'd like to see the rest of the list.

00:16:58.000 How many comics do you know?

00:16:59.000 I know Richard Jenny.

00:17:00.000 Who else?

00:17:01.000 Oh, there's been...

00:17:02.000 Well...

00:17:04.000 I was just thinking of...

00:17:07.000 Who the hell was I just thinking of?

00:17:08.000 Robin Williams, of course.

00:17:09.000 Robin Williams, yeah.

00:17:11.000 I'm trying to think of what other profession.

00:17:13.000 There's a lot more cops than there are comedians.

00:17:16.000 I mean, at least people you've heard of.

00:17:18.000 Probably a bunch of people that never made it that did it.

00:17:20.000 But now I've got to find out what happened to Skippy.

00:17:22.000 Yeah.

00:17:24.000 Jamie will Google that.

00:17:25.000 Skippy from Family Ties.

00:17:26.000 We'll see what happens.

00:17:27.000 Yeah, so I had to go out and just...

00:17:31.000 Tough it out. 0.69

00:17:32.000 And it was like, it sucked, you know? 0.95

00:17:34.000 It was humbling, you know? 0.55

00:17:36.000 It was interesting, it was tiring, it was a little depressing, but it was like mostly scary and humbling.

00:17:46.000 Well, if you've got kids, it's a tricky situation.

00:17:48.000 Like, you've got to go to work.

00:17:49.000 You've got to get something done.

00:17:51.000 Yeah.

00:17:51.000 Especially, when you left your radio show, when your radio show got canceled, did you have any sort of a severance package or...

00:17:56.000 Yeah, the good news is I had until the end of the year.

00:18:01.000 So I had like nine and a half months to get paid, but the clock was ticking and the phone wasn't ringing.

00:18:08.000 And so I was like, I gotta get out there.

00:18:10.000 And then...

00:18:11.000 At a certain point, I just decided I need to take this guy and tweak him a little bit and make him into a movie.

00:18:22.000 And so we did the crowdfunding thing and raised the money that way and blah, blah, blah.

00:18:28.000 Turned out, the movie's really good, actually.

00:18:32.000 Did I get it to you or not?

00:18:34.000 Yeah, I just haven't had a chance to watch it.

00:18:35.000 I'm going to watch it this weekend, though.

00:18:36.000 I'm going to Dallas.

00:18:37.000 I'm going to hit the road.

00:18:39.000 You're going to like it.

00:18:41.000 Yeah, you'll recognize a lot of people in it.

00:18:44.000 I've managed to stifle that sort of boredom on the road.

00:18:49.000 One of the things I do is I always bring my friends.

00:18:51.000 I bring really funny guys that open for me.

00:18:54.000 And two, I mix it up a lot with the UFC. Like this weekend, I'm doing the Majestic Theater on Friday night in Dallas.

00:19:02.000 And then Saturday night, there's a big UFC event.

00:19:04.000 So for me, it mixes things up.

00:19:06.000 I miss my family.

00:19:07.000 I miss my home.

00:19:08.000 But I like all the people that I work with.

00:19:11.000 I love working for the UFC. I love doing stand-up.

00:19:13.000 So the road is not bad for me.

00:19:15.000 And I only do it for like a couple days.

00:19:17.000 I know guys who go out for like 20, 30 days in a row.

00:19:20.000 And you just come back and you're a shell. 1.00

00:19:22.000 You know, you have to fucking drink orange juice for a month just to get your fucking electrolytes back. 0.99

00:19:27.000 Yeah, that's my whole thing, is I would just go out for two days, work really hard for like two days, and then come back two, three days. 0.99

00:19:34.000 I'd try to keep it to that with the family and podcasting and all that stuff.

00:19:40.000 And yeah, variety and mixing it up, that's the other key.

00:19:44.000 So now, half the time, now, for me, it's like seven-eighths of the time I'm just doing a live podcast.

00:19:52.000 I brought you something.

00:19:54.000 Are those yours?

00:19:55.000 Do you recognize those?

00:19:56.000 Reading glasses?

00:19:57.000 Do you recognize those?

00:19:58.000 No, I don't.

00:19:59.000 You sure?

00:20:00.000 Yes. 0.99

00:20:01.000 I think you left those bitches at my house in like 2009. I think Lisa Loeb left these at your house in 2009. They might not be yours. 1.00

00:20:11.000 I might be confused.

00:20:13.000 Sure?

00:20:14.000 I'm pretty sure, yeah.

00:20:16.000 They work for me.

00:20:17.000 It's weird.

00:20:18.000 I started using them.

00:20:19.000 They might be yours, dude.

00:20:20.000 They don't work aesthetically for you.

00:20:22.000 No, they don't work aesthetically.

00:20:23.000 But they do, because I like things like fanny packs. 0.99

00:20:26.000 I like shit that doesn't work aesthetically. 0.99

00:20:28.000 Oh, my God. 1.00

00:20:29.000 I'm so glad.

00:20:30.000 I'm looking to get that fanny pack going, man.

00:20:33.000 Listen, I've been bringing it back.

00:20:34.000 I sell them.

00:20:35.000 I have one for you.

00:20:35.000 Do we have one for them?

00:20:36.000 Go get them one.

00:20:37.000 We have a real good one.

00:20:38.000 Don't dangle that pack in front of me unless I'm taking it home.

00:20:41.000 You're taking it home, sir.

00:20:43.000 I've got one for you.

00:20:44.000 It's leather.

00:20:44.000 It's a nice roots fanny pack.

00:20:46.000 Very sturdy construction.

00:20:47.000 I don't travel without it.

00:20:48.000 Listen, I just got back from the East Coast, and it was snow in New York, snowing the whole time.

00:20:57.000 Look at that.

00:20:58.000 Oh, I'm pumped.

00:20:59.000 Yeah, look at that.

00:20:59.000 And by the way, this doesn't say, you know, a lot of fanny packs say, not getting laid.

00:21:08.000 Definitely checking out some comic books on a Saturday night.

00:21:12.000 This says, may have a gun.

00:21:15.000 And I like what this is projecting to the world a little better than the average fanny pack.

00:21:20.000 Wow.

00:21:21.000 I sold out of those three times.

00:21:23.000 This is nice.

00:21:24.000 If you go to higherprimate.com, I sell those.

00:21:27.000 It's got the Higher Primate logo in the pocket with the zipper in it, but that's roots.

00:21:31.000 Wow, it's really nice.

00:21:32.000 Well, Dice Clay had one.

00:21:33.000 He came in, he's got the sweatpants, I got the...

00:21:36.000 And I was like, I'm so happy that you wear a fanny pack, because I wear them all the time, and people give me a hard time.

00:21:41.000 If you're not trying to get laid, it's really the way to go. 0.95

00:21:43.000 Because, like, convenience-wise, like, you go to the airport, I unstrap that sucker, I drop it in that bin, and I'm done.

00:21:50.000 I'm not fishing in my pockets for coins.

00:21:52.000 I just made the proclamation because I just got back from the East Coast where there was a blizzard going on in New York.

00:22:00.000 I said, it's so nice wearing a big jacket with the inside pockets and the flaps and the things.

00:22:07.000 Like, finally, I can put my cell phone and my wallet somewhere because I'm so tired of the T-shirt and the jeans out here.

00:22:13.000 You're always sitting on your phone and whatnot.

00:22:15.000 I was happy just to be wearing the big parka that had all the...

00:22:19.000 All the pockets in it, but that wouldn't work around L.A. They'd think you're a homeless freak, so now I'm going fanny pack.

00:22:26.000 Yeah, thanks, buddy.

00:22:28.000 I love it.

00:22:28.000 I'm a big fan.

00:22:29.000 It became one of those things that got mocked, and guys just abandoned it because they didn't want to look like losers. 1.00

00:22:36.000 But I say fuck that. 1.00

00:22:37.000 No, but this... 1.00

00:22:38.000 But hold on a second.

00:22:40.000 This is like a lot more holster than it is fanny pack.

00:22:45.000 Yeah, it's nice, right?

00:22:46.000 I wouldn't even classify this...

00:22:49.000 I wouldn't call this a fanny pack.

00:22:51.000 Well, Roots sells it.

00:22:52.000 Roots, the luggage company from Canada, and they don't call it a fanny pack. 0.99

00:22:56.000 They call it like a waste bag or something fucking stupid, which is, you know. 1.00

00:23:01.000 Yeah. 1.00

00:23:02.000 Yeah.

00:23:02.000 But there's a negative connotation to fanny pack.

00:23:05.000 Not in my world.

00:23:07.000 All right.

00:23:07.000 Well, not with that bad boy.

00:23:09.000 I'm excited.

00:23:10.000 So Dice Clay came in with one of those on, and I saw that. 0.97

00:23:13.000 I'm like, that is a pretty goddamn sweet fanny pack.

00:23:16.000 And he's like, yeah, I love these. 0.96

00:23:18.000 I love them.

00:23:19.000 I'm wearing them all the time.

00:23:20.000 Oh! 0.60

00:23:21.000 So I contacted Roots and had them make one with my logo on it.

00:23:26.000 I was thinking about Dice the other day.

00:23:27.000 I was thinking, who invented him smoking the cigarette from around the back to the wrong side of his head?

00:23:34.000 And then, how did that work?

00:23:36.000 And then, who decided that was part of the comedy?

00:23:40.000 It's a weird thing to do.

00:23:43.000 I guess it's a way to stave off lung cancer, because it can barely...

00:23:50.000 I can't quite.

00:23:51.000 Or if I get too fat, I can't smoke because I can't get my hand around the back of my neck.

00:23:55.000 There he is.

00:23:56.000 He's like, oh!

00:23:59.000 Well, he got to a point, I think, where he was kind of mocking himself.

00:24:04.000 Was that it?

00:24:04.000 You know, that was a character.

00:24:05.000 You know that, right?

00:24:07.000 Yeah, no, I've talked to the guy quite a bit about it.

00:24:10.000 No, he's really just an actor.

00:24:12.000 Well, his name's Andrew Silverstein, and this Dice character was one of several characters that he did in his act.

00:24:19.000 He used to do John Travolta, he used to do Sylvester Stallone, and he would do this Dice Man.

00:24:24.000 And the Dice Man became...

00:24:26.000 Easily the most popular part of his act, so then he kind of morphed into being him, and then everywhere he goes would dress like the Dice Man.

00:24:34.000 Well, it's this weird trap.

00:24:37.000 Larry the Cable Guy was a stand-up that wasn't getting any traction, just became this guy on the radio in Tampa or something.

00:24:45.000 The next thing you know, the club would rather book Larry the Cable Guy than Dan Whitney.

00:24:50.000 Than Dan Whitney, so they go with Larry the Cable Guy.

00:24:53.000 I started off doing Mr. Burcham, the shop teacher, out here, and at a certain point, when it came time to take over on Loveline, K-Rock, the mother station, was like, we'd like you to host Loveline as Mr. Burcham.

00:25:12.000 The woodshop teacher.

00:25:14.000 And I was like, how's that going to work?

00:25:17.000 And they were like, well, we know Mr. Burcham is funny, but we're not sure if you're funny.

00:25:25.000 Which is a weird thing to say to the same guys doing both of them.

00:25:28.000 But I said, if I do Mr. Burcham on Loveline, I'm going to blow my voice out.

00:25:35.000 But I'm also, that's just not going to work.

00:25:37.000 Why would you blow your voice out?

00:25:38.000 How did it go?

00:25:39.000 Um...

00:25:40.000 Mr. Burcham was a 60-whatever-year-old Vietnam veteran who taught woodworking.

00:25:51.000 He taught remedial wood at Louis Pasteur Middle School in Monrovia.

00:25:56.000 That's very specific.

00:25:58.000 Yeah.

00:25:59.000 And he hated his kids.

00:26:02.000 He hated all his kids, and he would...

00:26:07.000 Every Monday, he would call into Kevin and Bean because he got into another accident in the garage, you know, with the bandsaw or something, and he wasn't going to be making it in.

00:26:17.000 So you'd say, well, why is this guy calling Kevin and Bean to tell him he's not coming in to teach his shop class that day?

00:26:28.000 And what I'd figured out is that all of his kids...

00:26:34.000 Who attended his class because it was junior high.

00:26:36.000 They all listened to K-Rock.

00:26:38.000 So he would use K-Rock as like his own PA system to speak to his kids like at 7.30 in the morning because they're all heading in.

00:26:50.000 And, you know, he'd be like... 0.98

00:26:54.000 Listen, I know you love all the smashing dumplings and nervosa and all that shit K-Rock plays. 0.98

00:27:03.000 That Quimby, Mr. Sapanze, is going to be taking over for me today. 1.00

00:27:07.000 So here's the deal. 0.79

00:27:08.000 You're all going to show up, we're going to put blood on the bandsaw on, and then you put your head down.

00:27:13.000 And nobody messes with my drill index.

00:27:15.000 Nobody messes with my Makita posers.

00:27:17.000 And then he'd get into, like...

00:27:20.000 His one student that he liked. 0.99

00:27:23.000 Because all asshole shop teachers always overcompensate with the one kid. 1.00

00:27:27.000 That's so true. 1.00

00:27:28.000 And they're total dickheads to 26 kids and super nice to one kid for some fucking reason. 1.00

00:27:35.000 Like super douchebag starlets are super... 1.00

00:27:39.000 Incredible with their dog, you know, and then super shitty with all the human beings around them. 0.99

00:27:43.000 It all gets channeled into the one terrier or something.

00:27:48.000 So he'd go, his one guy was Brad Higginsdoller.

00:27:53.000 He's like, Brad!

00:27:55.000 Been thinking about that kayak over the weekend.

00:27:58.000 I don't want to go with a butt joint. 0.99

00:28:00.000 I don't want to go with a dado. 1.00

00:28:02.000 I don't want to go with a rabbit joint.

00:28:05.000 Let's go with a finger joint. 0.99

00:28:07.000 Oh no, let's go with a dado. 0.92

00:28:08.000 Put the dado set up on the contractor saw.

00:28:11.000 And I just go through all the super specific whatever that I knew from home building.

00:28:17.000 And this guy became this overnight sensation.

00:28:20.000 Because they didn't know if Mr. Burcham was a real guy or not. 0.99

00:28:24.000 Because he'd make a lot of jokes, but then he'd get super specific with shit. 0.98

00:28:29.000 And nobody knew who he was. 0.99

00:28:31.000 So then he got so popular, they wanted him to host Loveline.

00:28:36.000 But I was like...

00:28:38.000 I ended up doing that show for a decade.

00:28:40.000 I couldn't do it as Mr. Burcham.

00:28:42.000 So when you came in and you did it as Adam Carolla, was it like, boy, I don't know, Adam.

00:28:47.000 Do you think you could do a little Mr. Burcham?

00:28:49.000 Do you think we could do half Mr. Burcham, half Adam?

00:28:52.000 No one can see you, Adam.

00:28:53.000 Could you say Adam and Mr. Burcham?

00:28:54.000 Could you go like Phil Hendry style?

00:28:56.000 Do both voices back and forth?

00:29:00.000 So were you wearing a condom? 1.00

00:29:02.000 Hey, what are you asking about his cock for? 1.00

00:29:04.000 Yeah. 0.99

00:29:06.000 I just said, look, this is not going to work big picture.

00:29:11.000 Like, I could do one episode this way, but you don't want Mr. Bertram two hours a night every night.

00:29:18.000 Plus, we were just starting syndication, so we're only in one city that kind of knew Mr. Bertram, and then the rest of the cities didn't know Mr. Bertram, so it wouldn't have made sense.

00:29:31.000 You would have to start from scratch again.

00:29:33.000 I wouldn't have wanted to.

00:29:34.000 So we ended up in over 100 cities.

00:29:36.000 So that's probably best.

00:29:39.000 But yeah, that's how it all got started.

00:29:42.000 When you started your podcast, I did it way, way back in the day, back when you were still sitting on that couch and you had the clip-on microphones.

00:29:50.000 You went through all the...

00:29:53.000 Different versions of how to set it up, sort of the way everybody kind of does.

00:29:57.000 Like my friend Steve Rinella, he's got this great podcast now, and he's doing it.

00:30:02.000 He's the host of this show Meat Eater.

00:30:04.000 He's a professional hunter and an author, and they're doing a podcast now.

00:30:08.000 It's an amazing podcast, but they have these headset microphones on.

00:30:11.000 So they got the earphones and the microphone on it, and every time someone moves, it's clunk, clunk, clunk.

00:30:16.000 Yeah, right, right. 0.99

00:30:17.000 It's fucking maddening. 0.98

00:30:19.000 And I'm like, you can't have the headset mic. 0.98

00:30:21.000 You gotta have a mic that just sits there, a condenser mic.

00:30:24.000 Yeah.

00:30:25.000 The more people touch it, the more it's gonna suck for if you have earbuds on.

00:30:29.000 I gotta take my earbuds out.

00:30:30.000 I'm like, this is...

00:30:30.000 I'm gonna go crazy.

00:30:32.000 Yeah, I... God, I remember a million years ago when I was doing Bill Simmons' podcast from his garage.

00:30:40.000 He was set up but like only set up with one microphone or that's all they could do so I had to call into the show but I was there So I literally got his phone, like his home phone, and dialed in and then stood out in the driveway,

00:30:59.000 you know, so he didn't hear me in the room.

00:31:01.000 That's hilarious.

00:31:02.000 Well, I couldn't call in through the room because he'd hear me through the mic. 1.00

00:31:05.000 What the fuck? 0.99

00:31:06.000 It'd bleed through the mic. 1.00

00:31:07.000 And then the gardener started coming around with the leaf blower, and it's like, I'm calling into a...

00:31:11.000 You know...

00:31:14.000 No, he didn't understand what a podcast was.

00:31:17.000 No one did back then.

00:31:17.000 It was like standing out in his driveway talking on his, not even his cordless, you know, his home phone.

00:31:25.000 Right.

00:31:26.000 Just the cordless one.

00:31:27.000 That's hilarious.

00:31:28.000 Yeah, yeah.

00:31:29.000 So, yeah, everyone, get some decent equipment, please.

00:31:33.000 What year did you start?

00:31:36.000 I started in 09. 09. I started beginning, I started in February 09. Yeah, that's when this started too.

00:31:45.000 This started in 09 too.

00:31:46.000 But I started after you.

00:31:48.000 I think I started you, and first when I started it, I was doing it on Ustream. 0.55

00:31:53.000 Brian and I were just sitting in front of a, just a laptop, just fucking around.

00:31:57.000 It wasn't, the idea wasn't to do a podcast. 0.98

00:31:59.000 The idea was just to fuck around on Ustream. 0.57

00:32:01.000 And then as we started doing it, it was like, wow, this is a... 0.99

00:32:04.000 And then, but doing yours, I was like, ooh, Adam's got like a whole garage.

00:32:08.000 Like, look at this.

00:32:09.000 He's got a cool setup. 0.99

00:32:10.000 And then Anthony Cumia from Opie and Anthony, he's got some crazy fucking setup in his basement.

00:32:16.000 He was like the big inspiration because he had a green screen and a full studio with... 0.92

00:32:20.000 Yeah.

00:32:42.000 I just did, but I just called into a show last week, but I just did Opie's show. 0.96

00:32:48.000 I was just in New York going fucking running in a circle. 0.99

00:32:53.000 Jesus Christ, man. 0.99

00:32:55.000 You had that lawsuit.

00:32:57.000 I don't know how much you want to talk about this at all, but you had that lawsuit with the dude that you started out with.

00:33:01.000 Yeah.

00:33:01.000 That all got settled.

00:33:02.000 Yep.

00:33:03.000 That's all done now.

00:33:04.000 Yep.

00:33:05.000 It was a year full of lawsuits.

00:33:07.000 Had the...

00:33:07.000 Had that, had the patent troll.

00:33:10.000 The patent troll.

00:33:12.000 That was, Jesus Christ.

00:33:14.000 Did that wind up costing you money, the patent troll thing?

00:33:15.000 I know we raised some money for that, but how did that work out?

00:33:20.000 The bill was over 500 grand. 1.00

00:33:26.000 What the fuck? 0.99

00:33:28.000 My god explain what the lawsuit was about because if people want to pull their fucking hair out in traffic This is so it's so crazy that someone could actually pull you into court for this Well not only pull you into court but pull you into their court in You know Eastern, 1.00

00:33:47.000 Texas. 0.85

00:33:48.000 Yeah, where nobody has a podcast Yeah, nobody even knows what it is.

00:33:52.000 It's just a nice place to do business for these guys for those guys because they have creepy laws Well, they have judges. 0.99

00:33:59.000 They have relationships.

00:34:01.000 And, you know, first off, when you just step back and you look at the entire picture, who are the judges?

00:34:11.000 Judges aren't ex-firemen, ex-podcasters.

00:34:17.000 They're not carpenters.

00:34:19.000 They're lawyers.

00:34:21.000 The judges were lawyers, and then the congressmen were judges and lawyers, and the senators were judges and lawyers.

00:34:29.000 There's a little good old boys club going on.

00:34:33.000 And it's going on in Washington, D.C., and it's going on in all the places that the tentacles reach out to.

00:34:39.000 And it's legal.

00:34:40.000 And they're not there to upset their own apple cart, you know what I mean?

00:34:44.000 Like, in terms of reform and rules and righting a wrong and all that kind of stuff, how much you want to piss off the guy you're going to the country club with?

00:34:54.000 You'll see him at the country club on Saturday.

00:34:57.000 You know what it is?

00:34:59.000 It's like divorce attorneys.

00:35:02.000 Divorce attorneys, you think, oh, it's your side and his side and they're battling and he said and she said.

00:35:07.000 Not the attorneys.

00:35:09.000 They love it.

00:35:11.000 They're basically the relationship.

00:35:14.000 It's like saying, you know, the guy's walking through the park with the stick and the nail in the end of it, picking up garbage, picking up trash. 0.93

00:35:24.000 That guy must really hate litterers.

00:35:26.000 It's like, no, he doesn't.

00:35:27.000 That's how he has a job.

00:35:30.000 The attorneys are the ones that all end up just...

00:35:33.000 At the end, I mean, I've not been divorced, but I've certainly heard enough.

00:35:37.000 And I talked to Dr. Drew who's not been divorced, but he's heard enough.

00:35:41.000 And it's like, at the end, the people that win are both sides' attorneys.

00:35:46.000 They just keep going until everything's cleaned out.

00:35:49.000 And they do it on purpose.

00:35:50.000 They drag things out.

00:35:51.000 It's symbiotic.

00:35:52.000 They have the pilot fish and the shark or whatever.

00:35:55.000 You know, you think, oh, this guy, this attorney hates this other attorney.

00:35:58.000 No, he doesn't.

00:35:58.000 That's how he gets rich.

00:35:59.000 Well, not only that, if you're a person who's getting divorced, understand this.

00:36:03.000 If you're gonna go through mediation or whatever, even if you get along well with your ex-wife and you guys are both like, look, we love each other, but this is not working out.

00:36:11.000 Let's just break up. 0.97

00:36:12.000 The attorneys will try to get your wife to ask for some really unreasonable shit so that you can settle on some reasonable shit. 1.00

00:36:20.000 And so you're gonna get angry at her unreasonable shit. 1.00

00:36:23.000 Like, no, you can't have my fucking collection of, you know, whatever. 1.00

00:36:27.000 You know, like, I... I know, like, Sugar Shane Mosley had to give up his fucking championship belt. 0.99

00:36:33.000 You understand that? 1.00

00:36:34.000 He lost his fucking championship belt to a girl that he used to have naked hugs with, you know? 0.99

00:36:39.000 They used to get together and they used to touch each other and make each other feel good, so the judge decided, well, you know what, you need to give up that belt that you got punched in the head for, to this woman that used to touch you. 0.99

00:36:50.000 I would have gone like Jake LaMotta before he went to the pawn shop.

00:36:54.000 I would have just picked out everything out of that belt.

00:36:56.000 Just handed her a fanny pack with a shiny thing on the front of it. 1.00

00:37:00.000 Strapped that fucking thing to a tree and shot holes in it until it was worthless. 1.00

00:37:03.000 Well, yeah. 1.00

00:37:04.000 You know how all this shit starts? 1.00

00:37:06.000 I think all this shit starts like this. 1.00

00:37:08.000 You know, you say, look, let's just, let's focus on the kids. 0.99

00:37:13.000 Let's focus on what's fair.

00:37:15.000 Mommy and daddy shouldn't be arguing.

00:37:17.000 Let's not give all the money to the attorneys.

00:37:19.000 We're both reasonable people.

00:37:21.000 And then at some point, your ex-wife has some cunty friend who's been through a divorce says, you should just talk to my guy.

00:37:30.000 Just talk to my guy.

00:37:31.000 And then your ex-wife says, you know what?

00:37:34.000 I talked to Joe or I talked to Adam.

00:37:37.000 What?

00:37:37.000 We're just going to handle this and try to be reasonable about it.

00:37:41.000 And she'll go, you don't understand.

00:37:42.000 You could be burned.

00:37:44.000 You're going to need to be. 0.98

00:37:45.000 Just meet with him.

00:37:47.000 I'm just saying, just meet with him.

00:37:50.000 Just meet with the guy.

00:37:51.000 That's all I'm saying.

00:37:52.000 Just talk to the guy.

00:37:53.000 Next thing you know, she's sitting in an office in Century City. 0.97

00:37:57.000 This guy, of course, just sees a big old slab of bacon coming his way.

00:38:02.000 And he's like, oh, listen.

00:38:03.000 He says this and he says that, but what about 10 years from now?

00:38:07.000 He could agree to do this, but if he just agrees to it and you guys just have a handshake, he'd pull the plug the next day on child support, blah, blah, blah, alimony, blah, blah, blah.

00:38:16.000 And you worked real hard.

00:38:17.000 And the next thing you know, she's got an attorney. 0.99

00:38:20.000 Now it's time to lawyer up.

00:38:21.000 Mm-hmm. 0.99

00:38:22.000 And now it's time for these two to see how much fucking money they can make before you guys go your separate ways. 1.00

00:38:29.000 Phil Hartman, before his wife shot him and then killed herself, was going through this. 0.99

00:38:35.000 And we had a conversation about it.

00:38:39.000 He had a really bad relationship with his wife.

00:38:41.000 Real bad.

00:38:41.000 She would insult him in public.

00:38:43.000 They would be at a party.

00:38:44.000 The one who shot him?

00:38:45.000 The one who shot him, yeah.

00:38:46.000 Well, I did that math.

00:38:47.000 Yeah.

00:38:48.000 I did the math.

00:38:50.000 There was a little friction between the two.

00:38:52.000 Bit of an issue.

00:38:53.000 A little bit of an issue because she killed him. 0.98

00:38:56.000 In his sleep. 0.92

00:38:57.000 Shot him in the head while he was sleeping. 0.98

00:38:58.000 He used to take cough syrup and conk out because he was just so stressed out. 0.84

00:39:02.000 Yeah.

00:39:03.000 Apparently, the story was that he had finally told her that this is it, so I'm going to pull the trigger.

00:39:08.000 I'm getting out of here.

00:39:09.000 Right.

00:39:09.000 And she shot him when he was sleeping.

00:39:12.000 But when he was talking about it, I was the one who was trying to tell him to get divorced a long time ago. 0.99

00:39:19.000 Like, he had gone through these breakups where he'd moved out and then moved back in and, you know, they'd fight like cats and dogs and like, fuck this, I'm done. 0.98

00:39:27.000 And, you know... 0.99

00:39:29.000 A few people were saying, you know, you should try to work it out, and I was like, man, you gotta get, she's evil. 0.99

00:39:35.000 Like, this lady's crazy. 1.00

00:39:36.000 You can't fix crazy. 0.97

00:39:39.000 No, you can't fix crazy, and you can't fix that broken actress thing.

00:39:43.000 Do you know the type of person that desperately wants to be famous, and then they're medicated?

00:39:48.000 So she was on Zoloft, and then on top of the Zoloft, she's doing cocaine. 0.95

00:39:53.000 Which literally makes you psychotic.

00:39:54.000 They want a settlement through Zoloft.

00:39:56.000 The family want a settlement.

00:39:58.000 Oh, really? 1.00

00:39:59.000 Zoloft, apparently, you know, obviously I'm talking out of my ass. 0.99

00:40:02.000 I'm not a doctor. 0.99

00:40:03.000 I'm not a scientist. 0.99

00:40:04.000 But the word from people that have taken it is that if you take Zoloft and you mix it with some other chemicals, you can just lose your fucking marbles. 0.99

00:40:13.000 And one of the big ones is cocaine. 0.99

00:40:15.000 If you do Zoloft and cocaine together, you're just off the rails fucking crazy. 0.99

00:40:20.000 And that's when she shot him and then wound up shooting herself. 0.98

00:40:23.000 But when I was talking to him about it, I was like, man, just get out. 0.85

00:40:25.000 Just give her half. 0.75

00:40:26.000 Just give her half. 1.00

00:40:27.000 Fuck it, man. 1.00

00:40:27.000 You're going to make more money. 1.00

00:40:29.000 And he goes, but it's not half. 0.99

00:40:30.000 He goes, it's a fucking third. 0.99

00:40:32.000 He goes, the third goes to the lawyers. 0.99

00:40:34.000 He goes, it's two thirds you give to them.

00:40:36.000 You give a lawyer a third.

00:40:38.000 The wife gets a third. 1.00

00:40:39.000 It's a fucking third to the lawyers. 1.00

00:40:41.000 And he was going crazy, but it's a fucking scam! 1.00

00:40:43.000 Like, you could see his eyes were red, his face was sweaty. 0.99

00:40:46.000 He was just thinking about all the years that this guy...

00:40:49.000 I mean, he didn't make it.

00:40:50.000 Like, really make it.

00:40:51.000 I don't think he got on Saturday Night Live until he was in his late 30s.

00:40:53.000 Yeah, he was a graphic artist, I think.

00:40:56.000 Yeah, he was on Pee-wee's Playhouse.

00:40:58.000 Pee-wee's, you know, that TV show that he had.

00:41:00.000 And he wrote Pee-wee's Big Adventure.

00:41:02.000 He was one of the writers of that.

00:41:04.000 And, yeah, did some albums for, like, some rock bands and the...

00:41:08.000 Well, just to, not to, you know, pull the conversation away from people that are dead or missing.

00:41:16.000 Where's Skippy, by the way?

00:41:18.000 Did you find him?

00:41:19.000 Yeah, I'll pull it up.

00:41:21.000 So...

00:41:25.000 The podcast community, especially with guys like Joe, got together and we stood up to these guys because they know how much litigation costs.

00:41:35.000 The problem with the country we're living in is everybody has this thing where they go...

00:41:41.000 I've had people who bought a house for me 10 years ago and are like, hey man, there's a crack in the foundation and we need 25 grand.

00:41:53.000 And you're like, no, what are you talking about?

00:41:56.000 And then at some point, some lawyer is going to say to you, It's a lot cheaper just to give them, you know, probably give them down to $17,500.

00:42:05.000 Just give them the money.

00:42:06.000 It's going to be a lot easier than...

00:42:08.000 And cheaper, by the way, than...

00:42:10.000 And by the way, do you have the time to go downtown and sit in the...

00:42:13.000 It'll be so much easier just to...

00:42:16.000 Pay that.

00:42:17.000 Move on.

00:42:18.000 Right. 1.00

00:42:18.000 And you go, but what the fuck? 1.00

00:42:20.000 I don't even know what they're talking about. 1.00

00:42:21.000 Yeah, I know.

00:42:22.000 I know.

00:42:22.000 But it's going to be a lot easier and a lot cheaper.

00:42:25.000 And so that's what businesses do.

00:42:27.000 Because businesses are businesses.

00:42:29.000 They just want to make money.

00:42:30.000 They're not there to take a moral stand.

00:42:32.000 They just want to get the hell out of there.

00:42:34.000 Apple gave these same guys that sued you, gave them millions, right?

00:42:38.000 Something like that.

00:42:40.000 Yeah, but I think they took them to court, and I think they won millions.

00:42:43.000 Really?

00:42:43.000 But either way...

00:42:46.000 I was just like, look, it's not an option for me to cut you a check for $300,000, $500,000, whatever you're asking for.

00:42:56.000 It's not an option.

00:42:57.000 So the only option is to stay and fight.

00:42:59.000 But the amount of money it costs to stay and fight is insane.

00:43:04.000 $500,000?

00:43:05.000 Over.

00:43:06.000 More?

00:43:07.000 Yes. 1.00

00:43:08.000 God damn it. 0.99

00:43:09.000 But here's the deal. 0.99

00:43:12.000 And this is where I think your listeners and my listeners and every podcaster's listeners should be proud.

00:43:23.000 Sony and Apple and whoever they're going after, and they'll just go whoever, whenever, doesn't matter.

00:43:30.000 Paramount, doesn't matter.

00:43:31.000 They don't have a microphone.

00:43:33.000 They've got millions in the bank, and they've got a big corporation, but they don't really have a microphone.

00:43:39.000 We have a microphone.

00:43:41.000 So...

00:43:42.000 I used my microphone and your microphone, Chris Hardwick's microphone, and we all started talking.

00:43:50.000 And they didn't like the talk.

00:43:53.000 Really?

00:43:53.000 And they wanted the talk to stop.

00:43:56.000 You know this specifically from talking to them?

00:43:58.000 Yeah.

00:43:58.000 What did they say?

00:44:00.000 Stop talking shit. 1.00

00:44:02.000 Really? 1.00

00:44:03.000 Because they put some sort of a gag order?

00:44:06.000 Like it was part of the agreement?

00:44:07.000 Well, what they did is they said... 0.99

00:44:11.000 What they found was, you know, and I've had this happen, but it's like, you know, it's this weird thing where it's like, hey man, what's with all the shit talking? 0.98

00:44:21.000 And it's like, hey man, what's with all the suing? 0.99

00:44:24.000 Like they were upset at you because you were talking shit while you- Have a little decorum. 0.99

00:44:28.000 That's hilarious while we're trying to steal money from you. 1.00

00:44:30.000 Hold still while we sue you. 1.00

00:44:32.000 So I was like, I have a microphone.

00:44:33.000 Explain what the lawsuit was about, because it doesn't seem...

00:44:38.000 I don't know.

00:44:39.000 Maybe there's some merit to this.

00:44:41.000 I don't know.

00:44:42.000 It was about something on the internet in a serialized form. 0.97

00:44:45.000 It was unbelievably ridiculous.

00:44:48.000 To this day, I couldn't really explain it other than to say, if you made a playlist, somehow they had some sort of proprietary technology of a list or playlist.

00:45:02.000 That's all I know.

00:45:03.000 That's amazing.

00:45:04.000 That's all I know.

00:45:05.000 That's amazing.

00:45:06.000 We crowdfunded everything, and the whole community got together, and I wasn't out.

00:45:14.000 We raised enough money to pay the lawyers, but the most precious commodity is time.

00:45:23.000 That's the part you'll never get back.

00:45:25.000 But don't you think you got a lot of good publicity for it?

00:45:27.000 There was a lot of interest, and it probably generated a lot of interest towards your podcast.

00:45:32.000 Yeah, I mean, I imagine.

00:45:34.000 But I imagine if I got into a plane crash, I'd probably get some interest, too.

00:45:39.000 But it's still not the kind of thing I'm going to cross my fingers for.

00:45:43.000 Right.

00:45:43.000 I mean, but it is the kind of thing where it's like, yeah, yeah, there's a side where, okay, you're getting out there, you're talking about it, and all that, and that's fine.

00:45:52.000 But it's just this sort of thing where, as an atheist, with X amount of hours on the planet...

00:46:01.000 Reading emails from lawyers from Eastern Texas, it's just not on my, you know, getting phone calls, you know, I'm shooting a show for Spike and the phone's ringing, it's an update out of Texas, you know, it's like, I'm trying to do this other thing.

00:46:16.000 Did you have to physically go and sit in court in Texas?

00:46:20.000 Well, that's what it was coming to.

00:46:23.000 It didn't get to that point.

00:46:24.000 So you spent $500,000 plus before you even had to get to the actual court in Texas.

00:46:31.000 If you get to the actual court, it's probably between $1,200 and $1,500. 0.99

00:46:39.000 What the fuck is wrong with this world? 0.97

00:46:43.000 A lot. 0.99

00:46:44.000 Where's that money going?

00:46:46.000 Look. 0.99

00:46:46.000 It's a conversation about a fucking serialized podcast. 0.99

00:46:50.000 The first 50 grand went to try to get a change of venue because we're not in Lubbock or wherever the fuck it was in Texas. 0.99

00:46:58.000 The first 50 grand just got trying to move it to where we are. 0.92

00:47:04.000 That didn't go over very well.

00:47:06.000 Wow.

00:47:07.000 So you get through that.

00:47:08.000 Then you get sued by your ex-partner, your ex-friend, or however that works.

00:47:12.000 Whatever designation you want to give them.

00:47:16.000 How much do you hate the law right now?

00:47:20.000 Are you an anarchist now?

00:47:21.000 Are you going to go to the other side?

00:47:24.000 No, but I've realized that...

00:47:30.000 I was thinking about it, and I thought, you know, the amount of businesses...

00:47:39.000 You know, let's just pick a time.

00:47:43.000 1952. The average business that was semi-successful, or the average person that was semi-successful, how often do they get sued...

00:47:56.000 Versus 2015. I don't think there's such a thing as being successful in business or as a personality and not having people coming after you.

00:48:09.000 Now, I don't think you know how many...

00:48:12.000 I'm sure Kanye West has 13 lawsuits going simultaneously along with Chris Brown and whoever else.

00:48:22.000 I don't think...

00:48:22.000 A lot of them don't make the light of day.

00:48:25.000 But I just think there's no such thing as being Pepsi or Coca-Cola or Beatrice or Nabisco.

00:48:32.000 They probably have 47 to 147 lawsuits going all year, every year.

00:48:38.000 So this is like underlying almost economy of people suing to get these settlements.

00:48:46.000 You know the UFC is going through that right now.

00:48:48.000 Oh, what?

00:48:49.000 Class action lawsuits.

00:48:51.000 Several.

00:48:51.000 Four of them at the same time.

00:48:52.000 Well...

00:48:53.000 Ex-fighters, most of them fighters that weren't that successful, like weren't like championship caliber or, you know, got to a point in their career where they realized, you know, hey, I'm not really ever going to get rich off of this and then started suing and became a part of this,

00:49:09.000 you know, class action lawsuit.

00:49:11.000 Four of them that are going on.

00:49:13.000 Look, there's a bigger...

00:49:16.000 You see, it's all trickled down in this sense.

00:49:24.000 I've always said there was a time in this country when if you saw a guy driving a brand new Cadillac and, you know, the father and son were walking down the street and here comes Mr. Johnson and his big black Cadillac going up to the top of the hill, there was a time when the father would look at the son and say,

00:49:43.000 you study hard, you work hard, you get it done, and one day you can have big shiny Cadillac and live up at the top of the hill. 0.95

00:49:53.000 Now, smash cut to 2015, the son's looking at the dad going, what the fuck does he have that Cadillac, and we're driving a Isuzu Trooper. 1.00

00:50:03.000 This is bullshit. 1.00

00:50:05.000 Let's go throw a rock at that guy's Cadillac, or let's go see what we can get from Mr. Johnson. 1.00

00:50:10.000 See, there's a mentality of, you and I have the mentality of, and it's what this country was basically settled on, which is, go get some for yourself.

00:50:20.000 We have a larger and larger group looking around going, wait a minute, what are they doing, and how can I get some of what they got?

00:50:29.000 You know, this whole country is, but it's a whole mentality.

00:50:35.000 I mean, it's trickling down from the government.

00:50:38.000 It's sort of a slow poisoning.

00:50:41.000 You know, it's this sort of, you know, income inequality.

00:50:45.000 Yeah, why does that guy need three?

00:50:47.000 Joe Rogan's got a bunch of cars.

00:50:48.000 You drive them all at the same time?

00:50:51.000 You can't drive all those cars at the same time.

00:50:53.000 You have a vacation house?

00:50:54.000 You've got two houses?

00:50:56.000 What?

00:50:57.000 How many bathrooms in your house, Joe Rogan?

00:51:05.000 I used to have five.

00:51:06.000 I got rid of one of them.

00:51:06.000 Four.

00:51:07.000 Four? 1.00

00:51:07.000 How many assholes do you have? 1.00

00:51:11.000 Well, I live with three other people, so... 1.00

00:51:14.000 You're calling your kids and wife an asshole? 1.00

00:51:16.000 They have butts. 1.00

00:51:18.000 What do you need all those bathrooms and cool cars for? 0.98

00:51:21.000 You don't need all that.

00:51:23.000 Yeah.

00:51:24.000 So it should be equal.

00:51:26.000 Spread it out.

00:51:27.000 Well, that's what people that don't have anything think.

00:51:30.000 They think that everything should be socialism. 0.99

00:51:32.000 Well, also, it's like none of your fucking business what I have or what I do. 0.98

00:51:37.000 There's always going to be someone above me. 0.98

00:51:39.000 There's always going to be people below me.

00:51:41.000 And by the way, hey, Joe Rogan, where are you going to be this weekend?

00:51:47.000 Dallas.

00:51:48.000 Okay.

00:51:49.000 Ask Adam Carolla where he's going to be this weekend.

00:51:52.000 Portland and Seattle.

00:51:53.000 Not on my sofa, not with a beer in my hand, not throwing the ball with my kids in the backyard.

00:52:00.000 So you're trying to say that people don't have things in this world, they don't work hard, Adam Carolla?

00:52:04.000 Do you not understand that there's a built-in inequality in our system right now?

00:52:08.000 It's because of capitalism, and capitalism is the real issue here. 1.00

00:52:12.000 People that work and pay for things, by the way, that's capitalism, you fuck. 1.00

00:52:16.000 People that, like, you go to the store and you buy food, that's capitalism. 1.00

00:52:20.000 If you work for a job, they pay you.

00:52:22.000 That's also capitalism.

00:52:23.000 Don't say capitalism doesn't work, because that's not the issue.

00:52:26.000 Just because you're not successful, it doesn't mean that capitalism is corporate cronyism.

00:52:31.000 They go, oh, you don't think that guy who's humping drywall on a construction site, you don't say he's not working hard?

00:52:39.000 And I'm like, yeah, he's working hard.

00:52:43.000 Everybody, historically, has worked hard, but he's not working smart.

00:52:46.000 He's not doing what he's got to do to get the extra car that I have, because I used to carry the drywall.

00:52:53.000 Yeah, I did too.

00:52:54.000 Now I don't.

00:52:55.000 And by the way, he doesn't have to do that.

00:52:56.000 He can do other things.

00:52:57.000 If you think that job is too hard, you don't have to do it.

00:53:00.000 Nobody's forcing you to do it.

00:53:01.000 And if you do do it temporarily and you don't enjoy the hard labor, find another way.

00:53:06.000 There's other ways to do it. 0.99

00:53:07.000 But this idea that somehow or another everything's supposed to be equal is fucking unbelievably ridiculous. 0.98

00:53:13.000 Because there's no equality. 0.98

00:53:14.000 There's no equality in this world when it comes to...

00:53:16.000 Look, some people speak five languages.

00:53:19.000 You don't. 0.99

00:53:19.000 If you don't speak five languages, you're not fucking equal to that guy. 0.99

00:53:22.000 If that guy goes to France, he can communicate. 0.97

00:53:25.000 There's no equality in that.

00:53:27.000 It's not like, how come these French people don't just accept my language?

00:53:30.000 It doesn't work like that. 0.99

00:53:32.000 You have to work hard if you want to learn how to speak five fucking languages. 0.97

00:53:35.000 The amount of effort you put in is directly proportionate to the reward you get out of it, or if you do it intelligently, at least. 0.98

00:53:43.000 Right, but what...

00:53:45.000 What the people would say, who we vehemently disagree with, is that guy on the construction site can't Get to the next level and can't get off that construction site because his dad carried drywall and he's poor.

00:54:02.000 And he's a product of the system and he's a product of the education around him and he's a product of that environment.

00:54:08.000 Which may not help.

00:54:11.000 It's obviously much better, you know, Dr. Drew's dad was a physician and it definitely helped Dr. Drew become a physician. 0.91

00:54:21.000 But my dad didn't do shit, and I got more money than Dr. Drew, so what math shall we do here? 0.89

00:54:30.000 Well, you know, people figure things out. 0.97

00:54:32.000 There's a lot of people that figure things out in this world.

00:54:35.000 They figure out a way.

00:54:37.000 And some people don't figure it out.

00:54:40.000 And that's the same with playing games.

00:54:42.000 Like, there's some people that are really good at playing chess.

00:54:45.000 Why are they really good at playing chess?

00:54:46.000 Well, they study it and they figure it out and they get better at it. 1.00

00:54:49.000 And then other people fucking suck at it. 0.99

00:54:51.000 But they're also playing chess. 1.00

00:54:53.000 But they're playing chess and they're not thinking ahead, they're not focusing, they're not concentrating.

00:54:57.000 They might be distracted while they're playing that chess.

00:55:00.000 Life, when it comes to capitalism, when it comes to, I mean, forget capitalism, when it comes to trying to, let's use that phrase, get ahead.

00:55:08.000 It's a game.

00:55:09.000 It's a game. 0.98

00:55:10.000 And what you decide to do, whether you decide to build houses, or you decide to make paintings, or you decide to fix cars, whatever the fuck you decide to do, you're essentially playing a game.

00:55:21.000 The game is, I will try to get really good at this, and hopefully I'll get some money along the way. 0.52

00:55:26.000 And if you do not play the game, and you decide, I'm just going to stick to this whole digging thing, and, uh, why don't I have a Cadillac?

00:55:33.000 I'm not, I'm fucking digging this thing, I'm, I'm working all day!

00:55:36.000 But, by the way, what... 0.84

00:55:40.000 First off, and then the next thing they do is, the next thing out of their mouth is, you know money doesn't buy happiness, don't you? 1.00

00:55:46.000 It's like, good, then shut the fuck up. 1.00

00:55:48.000 Have fun in your Zuzu Trooper. 1.00

00:55:50.000 Like, okay, then why are we saying, look, you have a family, you know, when I was poor, I fucked hot chicks. 1.00

00:56:00.000 Did you really? 1.00

00:56:01.000 Yeah.

00:56:02.000 Wow.

00:56:02.000 Well, not supermodels.

00:56:04.000 And, you know, little refractory periods would go on sometimes months on end.

00:56:12.000 But, yeah, I drank beer. 1.00

00:56:14.000 I fucked. 1.00

00:56:15.000 I ate out. 1.00

00:56:16.000 I had fun.

00:56:17.000 And you were poor?

00:56:18.000 Yeah, we just had a different kind of fun.

00:56:20.000 Well, you didn't have children back then, too.

00:56:21.000 No, our kind of fun was get in the back of a F-150 pickup, and we're going to Baja, and we're going to buy some roadside fireworks and shoot them off out the back of the pickup truck and camp on the beach and surf naked and start a bonfire and drink some mezcal tequila.

00:56:38.000 It didn't cost anything.

00:56:39.000 I like it.

00:56:40.000 But it was still fun.

00:56:41.000 Yeah. 0.98

00:56:42.000 I mean, half the shit I did, you know, it didn't cost anything. 0.99

00:56:46.000 We just had fun. 0.99

00:56:47.000 Yeah, money does not buy happiness.

00:56:49.000 It's absolutely true.

00:56:50.000 And there's a lot of people that only focus on money, and they wind up being rich and miserable.

00:56:55.000 And that is a fact.

00:56:56.000 But that doesn't mean that you can't...

00:56:59.000 Get freedom from money that relieves pressure.

00:57:02.000 And that's where people are mistaken, this idea that it's one or the other, that it's either or. 0.99

00:57:06.000 Either you are enjoying your life as a poor person, you're happy and wonderful and loving, or you're a wealthy miser who fucking hates his life and lives in depression and drinks himself to death. 0.99

00:57:18.000 Or takes pills to avoid reality. 1.00

00:57:20.000 That's not true either.

00:57:22.000 What money does do, the big thing that it did for me, when I first got my first, I got one of those development deals.

00:57:29.000 I got a few of those back in the day. 0.97

00:57:31.000 But I got one before the fucking, the water ran out. 0.93

00:57:33.000 And all of a sudden I didn't worry about my bills. 0.83

00:57:37.000 All of a sudden I had this huge feeling, like a physical feeling of like, do you ever work out with a weight vest?

00:57:44.000 I like working out with weight vests.

00:57:46.000 I have a weighted fanny pack.

00:57:48.000 That's good too.

00:57:49.000 That's my new thing. 0.85

00:57:51.000 The thing about a weight vest is you take that sucker off and you feel so good. 0.91

00:57:56.000 Yeah.

00:57:56.000 And that's how I felt when I first got my first check.

00:57:59.000 I was like, wow, now I know that I can pay my rent this month.

00:58:03.000 Now I know that I could go to dinner and I can order what I want to order instead of order like the cheapest thing on the menu.

00:58:09.000 Yeah, I always tell people it doesn't make you happy. 0.98

00:58:13.000 What it does is it stops you from worrying about shit that makes you unhappy. 0.99

00:58:17.000 Yes. 0.99

00:58:17.000 Like, a parking ticket would ruin my week. 0.99

00:58:22.000 I mean, I remember getting...

00:58:29.000 Right, right.

00:58:44.000 Should you order a cocktail?

00:58:46.000 Should you order a glass of wine?

00:58:47.000 It's going to be eight bucks more.

00:58:49.000 Like, don't do it.

00:58:50.000 Yeah.

00:58:51.000 Yeah.

00:58:51.000 You already ordered an appetizer.

00:58:53.000 Don't get greedy.

00:58:54.000 And it's the thinking, too, the resources that are required to constantly be thinking about your bills.

00:58:59.000 When I was a broke comedian, I remember just always wondering how I was going to pay for this.

00:59:05.000 Like, oh, this is coming up. 0.97

00:59:06.000 This goddamn bill is going to be on the 15th, and I don't have that money. 0.98

00:59:10.000 And I've got to figure out that money. 0.99

00:59:11.000 And making phone calls and trying to get gigs and trying to figure out how to pay that bill.

00:59:15.000 All that goes away.

00:59:17.000 But the whole point is you never looked around and went, who can do this for me?

00:59:22.000 You just found a mirror and went, I've got to get after it a little harder.

00:59:26.000 Yeah, you can't think like that.

00:59:28.000 That's a trap.

00:59:30.000 But don't you think when we're constantly hitting everyone over the head, I can't stand...

00:59:37.000 When I hear the politicians go, it's not a level playing field, I'd like to tell you it was a level playing field, but it's just not.

00:59:44.000 Well, it's not.

00:59:45.000 Neither is life. 0.99

00:59:46.000 When you see a beautiful woman, when you see a beautiful woman, and then you see some woman with unfortunate genetics, what the fuck? 1.00

00:59:52.000 Did that beautiful woman, did she earn that? 1.00

00:59:54.000 No.

00:59:54.000 This is not even.

00:59:56.000 It's not even.

00:59:57.000 Some women are born with perfect bone structure, and that is just something you're gonna have to deal with in this life. 1.00

01:00:03.000 You know, I'm five foot eight.

01:00:04.000 What if I loved playing basketball?

01:00:07.000 What if I wished I was seven feet tall? 1.00

01:00:09.000 You know, I've met giant basketball players, and I'm like, fuck! 0.99

01:00:12.000 Like, this is not even. 0.99

01:00:15.000 We're not born with the same chips or the same deck of cars.

01:00:19.000 We're just not.

01:00:19.000 How, by the way, could you ever?

01:00:22.000 And then how's the government going to figure that out?

01:00:24.000 And yeah, you can make the school system as even as you can, and you can make the law as even as you can, but the chick who's 6'1", who looks like Heidi Klum, still going to have a quite advantage over Alex Borstein. 1.00

01:00:43.000 Yeah, there's no way around that.

01:00:45.000 But the Alex Borsteins, and she's a dear friend, I don't even know who that is.

01:00:51.000 Okay.

01:00:52.000 She does, let's see, Living Color.

01:00:55.000 Oh, she's Canadian? 0.97

01:00:56.000 Oh, not Living Color.

01:00:57.000 The Fox.

01:00:58.000 Tell the Fox shows.

01:00:59.000 Okay.

01:00:59.000 Yeah.

01:01:00.000 You'll know.

01:01:00.000 I get it.

01:01:01.000 She does Lois on Family.

01:01:03.000 Let's go with Blossom. 1.00

01:01:05.000 Oh.

01:01:05.000 The chick from Blossom who's on the Big Bang.

01:01:07.000 Maya Bialik.

01:01:08.000 Yeah, there you go.

01:01:09.000 Alex Moore seems better, but all right, all right.

01:01:11.000 How dare you?

01:01:11.000 The point is, well, you should know who she is.

01:01:14.000 You work in this business.

01:01:15.000 I know, barely.

01:01:15.000 The point is this.

01:01:18.000 Because she doesn't look like Uma Thurman, she went to work hard developing a bunch of other skills other than looking good on a Saturday night, and now makes a nice living. 0.98

01:01:31.000 Right.

01:01:32.000 That's fine.

01:01:33.000 That's fine.

01:01:35.000 It's the way it should be.

01:01:37.000 It's just...

01:01:38.000 Let's not convince that person they can't do anything.

01:01:42.000 Let's just say you won't be doing any runway or catalog work.

01:01:46.000 But you can do a lot of voiceovers.

01:01:48.000 What if the government comes along and figures out a way to turn everybody into Uma Thurman?

01:01:54.000 And then people are like, you know, the government should be making you look like Uma Thurman.

01:01:58.000 Here you are, here you are, stuck with this normal body.

01:02:01.000 And there's Heidi Klum running around out there. 1.00

01:02:04.000 Why hasn't the government put resources to turn you into Uma Thurman and create jobs while they're at it?

01:02:08.000 The second, by the way, everyone becomes Uma Thurman, Uma Thurman becomes a five.

01:02:17.000 Guys would adjust immediately.

01:02:20.000 It'd be a really fun first six months.

01:02:26.000 And then she'd come down to a five.

01:02:28.000 Well, don't you think that's going to happen anyway?

01:02:30.000 I'm a hundred percent convinced that we're going to be able to manipulate people's bodies to the point where within a hundred years, we're going to be able to create, you know, whatever you want.

01:02:37.000 You could look like the thing from Fantastic Four.

01:02:40.000 You know, they're going to be able to do things to your body. 0.98

01:02:43.000 People are already doing weird body modifications, you know, putting like bolts in their heads and cutting the tips of their fucking noses off and weird shit just to look weird and interesting, tattooing their face up. 0.98

01:02:54.000 Bruce Jenner talking about the tip. 0.99

01:02:57.000 People are doing a lot of weird shit, right? 0.98

01:02:59.000 Listen, look, if you can go from Wheaties box to just brand new box... 0.99

01:03:12.000 We can do anything.

01:03:14.000 Because there's no greater chasm between Wheaties box and freshly minted box.

01:03:19.000 An old woman. 0.99

01:03:21.000 It's weird.

01:03:21.000 He's becoming an old woman, too.

01:03:23.000 No difference.

01:03:23.000 Now, wait.

01:03:24.000 What happened to Skippy now?

01:03:25.000 Now we've got to know.

01:03:26.000 He was on some show recently.

01:03:28.000 He's out there alive.

01:03:29.000 He's still doing stand-up.

01:03:30.000 Boy, he looks like he drinks.

01:03:33.000 Look at that face.

01:03:34.000 Skipping TV for stand-up.

01:03:36.000 I don't think that's exactly what's going on.

01:03:39.000 Previously known as Skippy from Family Ties.

01:03:41.000 When you say skipping TV, he's been skipping it for 20 years.

01:03:46.000 Making waves as a comic. 0.83

01:03:47.000 Oh, this is like one of those weird local newspapers that bullshits. 0.78

01:03:51.000 Yeah, don't even.

01:03:52.000 So he was a contestant on Last Comic Standing in 2006. Well, at least he didn't go to the woods and kill himself.

01:03:59.000 That's all I'm saying.

01:04:00.000 He's out there hoofing it.

01:04:01.000 So back to my movie, Joe.

01:04:03.000 Yeah, back to your movie.

01:04:04.000 And the government creating jobs for you.

01:04:07.000 Giving you a movie deal.

01:04:09.000 Other people don't have a movie.

01:04:11.000 Adam Carolla?

01:04:11.000 Yeah, why do I get to make a movie?

01:04:13.000 Yeah, why do you get to make a movie?

01:04:14.000 Because I raised the money.

01:04:15.000 No, no, no.

01:04:16.000 No, because you're white-privileged. 1.00

01:04:17.000 Because you're cisgender, white-privileged shitlord out there. 1.00

01:04:21.000 I should have... 1.00

01:04:23.000 Back when I was cleaning up garbage on the construction sites, I should have played the white privilege card. 0.99

01:04:29.000 You were still white privileged even back then.

01:04:31.000 The other Mexicans that you were working with back then cleaning up garbage, where are they now? 1.00

01:04:34.000 I'll tell you why they aren't where they are, because they didn't have the white privilege. 0.60

01:04:37.000 Ah, that's right.

01:04:38.000 They weren't cisgendered.

01:04:40.000 At a certain point, I remember well, it was like 1985, I was picking up garbage on a construction site, In Granada Hills, and a helicopter landed, and Donald Trump got out.

01:04:51.000 Really?

01:04:52.000 You! 0.99

01:04:52.000 You're white! 0.99

01:04:53.000 It's amazing!

01:04:53.000 Get in here right now!

01:04:55.000 What do you think you're doing?

01:04:57.000 And we jumped in the helicopter with retractable landing gear, by the way.

01:05:00.000 That's how you really know you've arrived.

01:05:01.000 And we flew right to Trump Tower, and he gave me an ascot.

01:05:05.000 And from that day on, I didn't know about white privilege.

01:05:08.000 Evidently, he'd been keeping tabs on me the whole time.

01:05:11.000 That's nice.

01:05:11.000 And he was able to then give me the money to make Roadheart.

01:05:14.000 You got in with the cronies.

01:05:16.000 Yeah, that's what happens.

01:05:18.000 White people, we all conspire together to keep white people rich. 0.87

01:05:22.000 Meanwhile, nobody sues white people more than white people, right? 0.69

01:05:24.000 That's true. 0.94

01:05:25.000 You're being sued by white people, I'm sure. 0.89

01:05:27.000 I would say white people do the lion's share, the white lion's share of the suing. 0.80

01:05:35.000 Yeah, it's a lot of white on white.

01:05:36.000 It's a little more blue collar.

01:05:38.000 We like to keep it a little more blue collar.

01:05:40.000 We don't like to see our victims, mostly through email.

01:05:43.000 Did you meet those people that were suing you?

01:05:44.000 No.

01:05:45.000 No?

01:05:46.000 No.

01:05:47.000 They just got tired.

01:05:49.000 But did you know their names?

01:05:51.000 No.

01:05:52.000 No? 0.99

01:05:53.000 Man, they didn't like you talking shit about their corporation, their entity, their LLC. Imagine if you got some actual physical dudes, you could put their faces up on your website. 0.98

01:06:05.000 You know, my thing was...

01:06:09.000 You know, as soon as everybody, not just me, but the community sort of band together, I was like...

01:06:19.000 As soon as they wanted me to stop, I realized it was sort of like punching a guy in the stomach and watching him wince, you know, like when you're sparring and go, oh, okay, I get it.

01:06:31.000 He's getting punched there again.

01:06:34.000 And so I doubled down, and at a certain point, they were like, you know, make it all go away, Mr. Wizard.

01:06:42.000 And that was it.

01:06:43.000 But...

01:06:45.000 It was, you know, it's tough, you know, and I understand.

01:06:52.000 It's sort of like, it's a lot like going through a divorce without getting divorced.

01:06:57.000 It's just a lot of, you know, why am I wasting all my time with this?

01:07:02.000 You know, why?

01:07:03.000 You know, there's a lot, I'll tell you what's going on, sort of on a micro and macro level, I think, in this country.

01:07:10.000 It's essentially being punished for being successful. 0.99

01:07:16.000 Like, I talk to my guys at work all the time, and I go, don't ever be successful, because you'll just get the shit kicked out of you. 0.99

01:07:23.000 You really tell them that? 0.99

01:07:25.000 I do, and I do...

01:07:28.000 You're joking, obviously. 1.00

01:07:30.000 Well, then I go, I know, there's no chance of that, but even if you get a wild hair up your ass. 0.99

01:07:34.000 But, I mean, you think about... 0.99

01:07:36.000 You think about the relationship, even...

01:07:39.000 I'll talk to a lot of successful guys.

01:07:40.000 Talk to successful guys.

01:07:42.000 Like, I... I'll give you this.

01:07:45.000 Okay.

01:07:46.000 I go to the Mexican lady barber, $12 haircuts. 1.00

01:07:51.000 I don't give a shit. 0.99

01:07:52.000 And she has no idea who I am. 0.99

01:07:54.000 And we always chat when she's cutting my hair.

01:07:56.000 And, you know, I ask her, like, how you doing?

01:07:58.000 And I know she goes to her sister's house a lot.

01:08:00.000 She's like 55, 60 years old, but still, like, has sleepovers and stuff.

01:08:04.000 And her and her other sister go there, and they have card night.

01:08:07.000 That's cool. 1.00

01:08:08.000 And shit like that. 0.99

01:08:09.000 And... 0.99

01:08:10.000 Whenever you find, like, especially male or female, but you start talking to that successful celebrity dude, and you start talking to him about his sister...

01:08:24.000 Or his sisters or his brother.

01:08:26.000 Start scratching around a little bit.

01:08:28.000 Ask how that relationship's going.

01:08:31.000 Find out about the time that they sucked you into this business deal, never gave your money back, and by the way, are pissed at you. 0.99

01:08:39.000 Find about that time when your sister needed to borrow a little whatever, or you paid for a kid's private school for like three years, and then when you finally said, I can't pay for it anymore, she called you an asshole and stormed out of the room. 0.99

01:08:53.000 Just in general, see how those relationships are going. 0.97

01:08:58.000 I have a great relationship with my sister.

01:09:01.000 You get along great.

01:09:02.000 She doesn't, you know.

01:09:03.000 Really?

01:09:03.000 Yeah.

01:09:04.000 Shit. 1.00

01:09:04.000 She's cool. 1.00

01:09:06.000 She must be doing her own shit. 1.00

01:09:07.000 She's always done her own shit. 1.00

01:09:09.000 She's just not that type. 1.00

01:09:10.000 She's just, uh, she's cool.

01:09:13.000 She's just down to earth, normal.

01:09:14.000 You don't have a brother?

01:09:16.000 Nope.

01:09:16.000 I guarantee if you had a brother.

01:09:17.000 I'd beat his ass. 1.00

01:09:19.000 He'd be fucked. 1.00

01:09:20.000 He'd be coming after you. 1.00

01:09:21.000 He'd be like, hey man, I got this idea for a frozen yogurt place. 0.99

01:09:25.000 Or I'd love him, and we'd be great friends, you know, if he got his shit together. 0.99

01:09:29.000 It's all, you know, I have friends that have brothers, and they have the worst relationship with their brothers. 0.98

01:09:33.000 Like, they fought when they were young, and now they're adults, and one of them is successful, and one of them's not.

01:09:37.000 It's usually like...

01:09:38.000 Well, what I'm saying is, the successful one... 0.92

01:09:44.000 Ask the successful one how good the relationship is with the brother that's not successful and see if it's not based on a lot of shit that the brother was asking from them from the point when they see the guy's name on the collar ID that they don't even want to pick up anymore. 0.96

01:10:02.000 Because they know it's just going to be him asking for something. 0.90

01:10:05.000 That's the weird, uncomfortable thing about certain friendships when people want to drag you into business deals.

01:10:10.000 But I just don't do any of that anymore.

01:10:13.000 I did it all when I was younger.

01:10:14.000 I got into a lot of I'll loan you money situations.

01:10:17.000 Right.

01:10:17.000 And you know how many people paid me back?

01:10:20.000 Zero.

01:10:21.000 Yeah, zero.

01:10:21.000 Zero.

01:10:22.000 No, I always say...

01:10:24.000 It's hilarious. 0.99

01:10:24.000 It's like giving someone money, except for when you give someone money, at least you fucking get thanked. 0.99

01:10:32.000 Mm-hmm. 0.89

01:10:32.000 This is, I gave you some 10 grand or 50 grand and I never got thanked, but I never got my money. 0.89

01:10:39.000 Yeah.

01:10:40.000 So it's like lose-lose.

01:10:42.000 I'm out the money, and I didn't even get the thank you.

01:10:44.000 Right.

01:10:44.000 At least when you give a bum five bucks, he goes, God bless you.

01:10:47.000 Well, people feel like they're just one deal away.

01:10:51.000 There's a friend that I have that I talk to every now and then, and I call him up, and I talked to him recently, and I called him up, and I was like, what's up, man?

01:10:59.000 How you doing? 0.80

01:11:00.000 And I wanted it to be, hey, everything's good, you know, blah, blah, blah, just doing this and doing that, and But immediately it was a fucking sales pitch for some new business that he wants to start. 0.55

01:11:10.000 And if I get involved, we're gonna make this amount of money and it can't go wrong because it's this and that. 0.97

01:11:14.000 And I mean, this guy is just ear beating the fuck out of me for like five minutes on the phone.

01:11:18.000 I go, dude, dude, dude, I'm not getting involved in anything. 0.81

01:11:21.000 Well, you don't even have to get involved.

01:11:22.000 Nope, I'm not doing it. 0.94

01:11:24.000 I go, listen, man, I'm fucking crazy busy. 0.90

01:11:27.000 I'm not getting in. 0.88

01:11:27.000 I just wanted to call to say hi. 0.88

01:11:29.000 Look, I'm telling you, man, you barely, you don't even have to know about this.

01:11:32.000 I go, I'll know. 0.99

01:11:33.000 I'll know, and it'll fuck with my head, and I'll know that it's out there. 0.99

01:11:37.000 But listen, you're going to be making money, free money, it's easy, I'm going to do all the work. 1.00

01:11:40.000 Dude, stop!

01:11:41.000 Stop! 1.00

01:11:41.000 Okay, I gotta go. 1.00

01:11:42.000 I'll give you a perfect concrete example, literally a concrete example.

01:11:50.000 If you buy, and I did, a warehouse in anywhere near your old neighborhood, your phone will start to ring.

01:12:03.000 Hey man, I got a catamaran boat and I'm going through a pretty bad divorce right now.

01:12:08.000 Wanna buy it?

01:12:09.000 No.

01:12:11.000 Can I just put it in the parking lot for just a couple of days or maybe a couple of weeks?

01:12:16.000 I don't know.

01:12:16.000 I'm staying over at the Oakwoods right now and there's no place to park it.

01:12:21.000 And then the phone will ring again.

01:12:22.000 It'll be another one of your friends.

01:12:24.000 Listen, I got a new pickup truck, but the old one has got the Denver boot on it, so I can't really drive it.

01:12:31.000 But I'm still making payments on it.

01:12:34.000 Could I just...

01:12:35.000 I could flat...

01:12:36.000 I could flatbed it over to the warehouse, but I'm just looking for a place.

01:12:41.000 I mean, I'm going to get the Denver boot off, and then I'm going to sell it back to the... 0.99

01:12:45.000 Your warehouse will immediately fill up with everyone's shit. 0.99

01:12:52.000 Because you got the warehouse, and they don't. 0.99

01:12:55.000 And the warehouse is sort of the concrete metaphor for you having the position, the name, and the checkbook.

01:13:03.000 Right.

01:13:04.000 So you try it, because that's what happened to me.

01:13:06.000 How do you feel like that trickles down from the government?

01:13:09.000 Like, how do you feel like that trickles down from the government, too?

01:13:11.000 Don't you think that the government is just sort of responding to people that don't necessarily know how to become successful?

01:13:16.000 And that's like, this is the desire, the government, like, this idea that the government creates jobs.

01:13:22.000 The government's creating jobs.

01:13:24.000 What does that mean?

01:13:26.000 I don't know.

01:13:27.000 No, no, what I'm saying is, is...

01:13:30.000 I don't think that it trickles down directly from the government.

01:13:36.000 What I'm saying is, first off, there's a mentality. 0.99

01:13:40.000 And the message should be, pick yourself up by your own fucking bootstraps. 0.99

01:13:47.000 That's what this whole country's been about. 0.99

01:13:50.000 Everybody has a story about a grandparent coming over here with three nickels in his pocket, working hard, and getting his shit together. 0.95

01:13:57.000 So that should be the message, number one.

01:14:00.000 Well, the playing field's not level, and there's wealth, income, you know. 1.00

01:14:06.000 Fuck that. 1.00

01:14:07.000 So first off is the message. 1.00

01:14:09.000 Get your shit together. 1.00

01:14:10.000 And work hard. 1.00

01:14:11.000 You'll be fine.

01:14:12.000 Doesn't matter what your ethnicity is.

01:14:13.000 Doesn't matter what your religion is. 0.56

01:14:15.000 Doesn't matter what your background is.

01:14:17.000 Just put it together and work hard.

01:14:19.000 And you're going to be working harder than Heidi Klum.

01:14:22.000 But English wasn't her first language either.

01:14:24.000 She figured it out along the way.

01:14:26.000 Now she's figured out how to make millions of dollars. 1.00

01:14:29.000 But first off, the message from the government should be that.

01:14:32.000 The second thing that's more direct that the government could do is...

01:14:36.000 Let's not make it so easy for everyone to sue anyone or take anything.

01:14:42.000 I mean, I'll give you for instance.

01:14:45.000 If you have a house and you're renting it out and some guy moves in and just decides to stop paying his rent, It's good luck getting the money from him.

01:14:55.000 Good luck getting him out of your house.

01:14:57.000 It takes a long time.

01:14:58.000 Right.

01:14:59.000 So the government could definitely help in that department.

01:15:02.000 That's your parcel of land that you pay taxes on.

01:15:06.000 This guy stopped paying you, but they're siding with him?

01:15:10.000 Well, sometimes people just move into people's houses and change the locks and squat, and they say it's their house.

01:15:16.000 That's even worse.

01:15:18.000 Right.

01:15:19.000 And what the government is quietly saying is...

01:15:22.000 Well, Joe's got his own house.

01:15:24.000 He used to have five toilets.

01:15:26.000 Now he's got four.

01:15:27.000 He's got a couple of nice cars up there.

01:15:29.000 Does he really need the...

01:15:30.000 I mean, he's doing all right, isn't he?

01:15:33.000 As long as he's paying taxes on that other house, there's really nothing we're going to do about it.

01:15:36.000 Is that what they're saying? 0.99

01:15:37.000 Or are they saying, look, we're so fucking overwhelmed with all sorts of other shit. 0.99

01:15:41.000 We're just going to let the lawyers sort this out. 1.00

01:15:43.000 And the lawyers, being the predatory cunts that they are... 0.96

01:15:46.000 Say, look, there's a lot of money to be made in keeping this conflict going, because that's what pays lawyers off. 0.98

01:15:52.000 Conflict.

01:15:53.000 Right.

01:15:53.000 The more conflict they can somehow or another write down in books, the more they can make it easier to sort of manipulate clauses and sue people for things like a serialized podcast on the internet.

01:16:08.000 Well, not only that, but all the stuff...

01:16:12.000 I mean...

01:16:14.000 Think about...

01:16:15.000 You just take your car.

01:16:19.000 Every new car you buy has a bunch of warning stickers that are hot glued to the sun visor, a bunch of buzzers and backup things, and a bunch of...

01:16:31.000 Deactivate the airbag buttons.

01:16:33.000 How much does that add to the average price of a car?

01:16:37.000 How much... 0.98

01:16:38.000 To the average flight is added to the ticket for just all the shit, all the insurance that the airline has to cover or that the car manufacturer has to cover or all the shit that's going to get people sued. 0.97

01:16:52.000 Think about just how much cheaper everything would be if everyone wasn't completely lawyered up and completely... 0.97

01:17:01.000 Trying to save themselves. 0.99

01:17:02.000 And think about all the stupid conversations and all the paperwork and how we've completely lost our humanity. 0.99

01:17:11.000 You know, the warehouse that I do my podcast from, when I bought that warehouse, there was a guy in it and he sold flooring. 0.99

01:17:20.000 And I bought it, but he had like nine, ten months left on his lease.

01:17:26.000 And I said to him, like, if you just bought a new warehouse and you're thinking, hey, I'd like to move, turns out my friends moved all their shit in, but I'd like to move some of my shit in or make a studio or something like that.

01:17:38.000 But a guy had a lease for like nine months.

01:17:41.000 So I talked to the guy.

01:17:43.000 And the guy said, well, you know, I am kind of looking for another place.

01:17:47.000 I'm thinking about buying a place.

01:17:48.000 And I said, well, as soon as you can find that place, tell me, because I'm anxious to get in here with my boys and get going and start building this place out.

01:17:59.000 And about three months later, he's like, I found another place.

01:18:03.000 And I said, fine, consider yourself out of your lease and have fun.

01:18:09.000 And he said, I'll be out by the 30th.

01:18:10.000 I said, absolutely.

01:18:12.000 And he said, I need you to sign this piece of paper.

01:18:15.000 And I said, what piece of paper?

01:18:17.000 And he said, the piece of paper that's releasing me from my lease.

01:18:22.000 And I said, we don't need a piece of paper.

01:18:24.000 I just looked in the eye and told you, you can leave.

01:18:27.000 And when you're ready to leave, you tell me.

01:18:29.000 And that's my word.

01:18:30.000 And he said, yeah, but sign the paper.

01:18:32.000 I said, what do we need a paper for?

01:18:34.000 We're two adults.

01:18:36.000 And I just told you, one adult to another, I can't wait to get in here.

01:18:39.000 I'm not going to let you.

01:18:40.000 It's not like you're going to leave and then I'm going to sue you for the next four months that you didn't.

01:18:44.000 I'm not that guy.

01:18:46.000 I'm the one who told you you could leave.

01:18:47.000 Now I shook your hand and you can leave.

01:18:49.000 And he said, you need to sign this release.

01:18:52.000 And I said, I'll tell you what, I'm not going to sign a release.

01:18:56.000 So you can either take my word as a man or you can just stay here for another four months.

01:19:01.000 But I'm not signing a release.

01:19:02.000 Wow.

01:19:03.000 And the guy said, fine.

01:19:05.000 He just split.

01:19:06.000 Whoa.

01:19:07.000 What could have happened there, legally?

01:19:09.000 I'd like to get...

01:19:10.000 What legally could have happened is I could have been many of the douchebags I've dealt with.

01:19:17.000 And I could have taken over the warehouse and then went and sent this guy a letter and said, hey man, you still have five months left on your lease and it's $3,300 or whatever.

01:19:30.000 That's $16,500.

01:19:34.000 If we've got to go to court, this is going to get expensive.

01:19:36.000 You know what?

01:19:37.000 I'll settle for $10,000.

01:19:40.000 And his lawyer probably would have said, you didn't get him to sign a release? 1.00

01:19:44.000 What are you, an imbecile? 1.00

01:19:45.000 You know what? 1.00

01:19:46.000 Just give him the 10. It's going to be a lot cheaper than paying me and going to court.

01:19:49.000 But what about, okay, to play devil's advocate or the argument against it, what about things like, you know the situation, I believe it was Chevrolet, had...

01:19:59.000 Some ignition issues that they knew about, where cars were cutting out, and it caused a bunch of deaths. 0.59

01:20:05.000 And a lot of people were aware of this issue, but they knew that a recall would be incredibly expensive, and they dragged their heels, and they didn't do anything about it for a long time, and now it's just a fucking complete disaster, and they're getting sued like crazy.

01:20:18.000 What about that kind of situation?

01:20:20.000 Like, it's kind of important to have lawyers.

01:20:22.000 Well, I mean, obviously, the balance, it's like...

01:20:28.000 Do you have an army?

01:20:29.000 Yes.

01:20:30.000 Do you invade Canada?

01:20:32.000 No.

01:20:33.000 Do you have police?

01:20:35.000 Yes.

01:20:36.000 Do they shoot every person darker than them walking down the sidewalk?

01:20:40.000 No.

01:20:41.000 Do you have lawyers?

01:20:43.000 Yes.

01:20:44.000 Do you have shitloads of lawyers that are suing everyone all the time?

01:20:48.000 No.

01:20:49.000 So, there's, you know, the balance...

01:20:52.000 There's reasons to sue.

01:20:53.000 Yeah, you know, the...

01:20:55.000 Ford Pinto, I had two of my best friends died about three miles from here in a Pinto station wagon that was in an accident and burst into flames.

01:21:10.000 Yeah.

01:21:11.000 That's the classic story that we had all heard.

01:21:14.000 Yeah.

01:21:14.000 You actually knew people like that.

01:21:16.000 Robert and Lenny from way back. 1.00

01:21:19.000 Fuck. 1.00

01:21:20.000 Going to CSUN. Goddamn. 1.00

01:21:22.000 Carpooling together. 1.00

01:21:24.000 Crazy.

01:21:25.000 Like, 18, just rear-ended. 0.68

01:21:30.000 Two cars banged up next to him, like couldn't get out.

01:21:33.000 The whole car just went up. 1.00

01:21:35.000 Fuck. 1.00

01:21:36.000 Yep. 1.00

01:21:37.000 It's crazy, right?

01:21:39.000 You always wonder, like, what would have those guys gone on to?

01:21:44.000 What could they have done?

01:21:46.000 And it's also weird that even though they died when they were 18, they're still always my age, whatever age I am, which is a weird thing.

01:21:57.000 It was...

01:22:00.000 And it's one of those, in that case...

01:22:04.000 There needed to be lawyers.

01:22:06.000 And Ford knew about it, and Ford thought, you know, let Robert and Lenny die.

01:22:11.000 It'll be cheaper than recalling, you know, 2.7 million units or whatever it was and outfitting them.

01:22:20.000 Yeah, there's a balance, right?

01:22:22.000 And I agree with you that there's definitely the mentality of going after successful people.

01:22:31.000 But obviously there's some successful people that are cunts and there's some successful people that have gotten there by ripping people off or by using slave labor in third world countries and charging them pennies on the dollar. 0.98

01:22:43.000 Things that could have been done in America with a reasonable wage. 0.94

01:22:47.000 There's a balance to all of it.

01:22:48.000 And it's for people that are listening to this, that are trying to form their own identity and carve their own path, the key is to not concentrate on other people and go, why them?

01:22:59.000 The key is to look at your own self and go, what do I want to do and how do I get there?

01:23:04.000 Right, because you could be Heidi Klum or Donald Trump, or you could be Robert and Lenny, who never saw their 19th birthday.

01:23:14.000 I'm guessing you're somewhere in between.

01:23:17.000 So, if you're somewhere in between, you just joined a huge pool called America, and it's time to get to work. 0.99

01:23:26.000 Get to work, bitches. 1.00

01:23:28.000 Get to work. 1.00

01:23:29.000 And try to be happy along the way.

01:23:30.000 Couldn't hurt.

01:23:31.000 You're out of time, man.

01:23:32.000 You only have like 90 minutes, right?

01:23:33.000 Yeah, I've had a...

01:23:35.000 I've got a crazy schedule.

01:23:36.000 Roadhardt.

01:23:36.000 At Roadhardt.com.

01:23:38.000 Hit the banner.

01:23:38.000 I'm going to watch it this weekend.

01:23:40.000 I hear great things about it.

01:23:41.000 I read a great review about it.

01:23:42.000 Well, Joe, promise me this.

01:23:45.000 If you see it, you like it, and you identify with it, next podcast, say how much you love it.

01:23:51.000 I will absolutely 100% do that. 0.60

01:23:53.000 Adam Carolla, ladies and gentlemen, triumphant victor over podcast-suing cunts of America. 0.96

01:24:00.000 That's it. 0.88

01:24:01.000 All right, listen to the Adam Carolla podcast.

01:24:03.000 There's about a thousand of them, various subjects, and even fucking one with Dennis Miller now you're doing on Podcast One.

01:24:10.000 He does too much. 1.00

01:24:12.000 He makes me look like a lazy bitch. 1.00

01:24:13.000 All right, ladies and gentlemen, Adam Carolla. 1.00

01:24:15.000 Thanks, Joe.

The Joe Rogan Experience - March 09, 2015

Joe Rogan Experience #622 - Adam Carolla

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