The Joe Rogan Experience - Joe Rogan Experience #799 - Brendan Schaub & Bryan Callen

00:00:00.000 Da-da-da-da! 0.96

00:00:02.000 We are live!

00:00:04.000 That better be the black bottle, too.

00:00:06.000 We're discussing how annoying it is.

00:00:08.000 I listened to the podcast, an episode that I did with Whitney Cummings.

00:00:12.000 I was listening to it because I had the long drive back from Irvine, and I realized how annoying it is.

00:00:17.000 I'm always clearing my throat.

00:00:19.000 I was telling Jamie he makes the best butter coffee, but it's a stout batch, and it gives you a lot of ahem.

00:00:26.000 A lot of butter, son.

00:00:27.000 Yeah, it's good, though. 0.97

00:00:28.000 Tastes goddamn good. 0.83

00:00:29.000 I'm wired right now. 0.97

00:00:30.000 It's like a hug.

00:00:31.000 It's like a coffee hug.

00:00:33.000 Tate says about coffee.

00:00:35.000 Tate from Cayman Coffee.

00:00:36.000 Warm coffee.

00:00:37.000 He says it's like a warm hug.

00:00:38.000 That's what it is.

00:00:39.000 I was with Keith Jardine.

00:00:42.000 I kind of ran into him at the airport.

00:00:44.000 And we were somewhere, I can't remember, and he said, you've got to follow me.

00:00:48.000 And I was like, what?

00:00:49.000 He goes, just follow me.

00:00:49.000 There's a very special coffee place here.

00:00:51.000 And literally, I'm like, okay, I don't know where I'm going.

00:00:54.000 And we walked like a mile, like, you know, one of those airports.

00:00:58.000 Brings me to this place.

00:00:59.000 He goes, this is the one place they have very good coffee.

00:01:01.000 You know, he talks kind of like, really kind of.

00:01:03.000 And they were closing.

00:01:05.000 And he said, do you mind staying open just a little bit longer?

00:01:08.000 And the guy looked at his ears and he's like, I suppose.

00:01:10.000 He goes, thank you.

00:01:12.000 We'll have a couple of these coffees, please.

00:01:14.000 Guy pours us the coffees.

00:01:15.000 And it was just so funny to watch this brute of a man sip the coffee with such detail and break down the taste.

00:01:22.000 He's like, a lot of citrus in this. 1.00

00:01:25.000 It sounds like you're about to get raped. 0.99

00:01:26.000 I don't like this conversation at all. 1.00

00:01:29.000 Just suck this dick. 1.00

00:01:31.000 Come with me. 1.00

00:01:31.000 I don't really want to. 1.00

00:01:32.000 Just come with me.

00:01:34.000 Can you stay open?

00:01:35.000 We don't really want to.

00:01:36.000 Just stay open.

00:01:36.000 This is weird.

00:01:37.000 Why are your hands on my shoulders? 0.62

00:01:38.000 It sounds like he's a bully.

00:01:39.000 Sit down. 0.99

00:01:39.000 I'm going to talk to you about something nobody gives a fuck about. 0.99

00:01:42.000 The flavor of coffee. 0.99

00:01:44.000 I want you to smell my breath after I drink it and get a little closer to my mouth.

00:01:49.000 There it is.

00:01:50.000 Now let's go ahead and drink deeply of my lips.

00:01:52.000 No, for real though, Keith loves coffee.

00:01:54.000 He's a smart dude.

00:01:56.000 He's a very smart dude.

00:01:56.000 And he loves to go to coffee shops.

00:01:58.000 I remember when we were training together, we'd get done training and he would take off to a bookstore or a coffee shop, put on his glasses and just read and sip coffee. 0.99

00:02:06.000 I was like, damn! 0.98

00:02:07.000 I love it. 0.99

00:02:08.000 Yeah, he's a smart dude.

00:02:09.000 He's a very misunderstood guy, Keith Jardine.

00:02:12.000 Soft spoken, the nicest guy of all time. 1.00

00:02:14.000 Yeah, if you've got a problem with Keith Jardine, you might be a piece of shit. 1.00

00:02:18.000 That's right. 1.00

00:02:18.000 You've got a problem with all of us. 1.00

00:02:19.000 How is it even possible?

00:02:21.000 He's so nice.

00:02:22.000 He's just a very unusual, interesting, humble guy. 0.99

00:02:27.000 Tate fucking loves coffee. 0.99

00:02:28.000 Yeah. 1.00

00:02:28.000 As does Tate. 1.00

00:02:29.000 Tate loves the shit. 1.00

00:02:31.000 Tate drinks too much. 1.00

00:02:32.000 Tate will sit here and we'll do a podcast together. 1.00

00:02:34.000 The motherfucker will down four nitros. 1.00

00:02:36.000 Jesus. 1.00

00:02:36.000 Each nitro is 270 milligrams of caffeine. 1.00

00:02:40.000 Dude, we're in his club.

00:02:42.000 Where were we at?

00:02:43.000 In Texas?

00:02:44.000 In Dallas?

00:02:44.000 We were at one of his clubs.

00:02:45.000 We had our after party.

00:02:46.000 The hunky-dunk place?

00:02:47.000 Yeah, something like that.

00:02:48.000 And he goes, bro, I have four kegs of nitro.

00:02:51.000 I was like, it's one in the morning.

00:02:54.000 What the hell are we supposed to do with it?

00:02:56.000 You go all night, man.

00:02:57.000 We don't understand.

00:02:58.000 He's sober.

00:02:59.000 Dead sober.

00:03:00.000 Dead sober.

00:03:01.000 And he'll use a lot of butter in that beard.

00:03:02.000 He'll use a lot of butter in that beard.

00:03:04.000 And he's not above grabbing me about the waist and pulling me right into his lap.

00:03:08.000 And I'm just like, I'm sitting in your lap right now and I'm afraid to move out of the way.

00:03:12.000 He smells like a bookstore.

00:03:14.000 He has like a unique smell.

00:03:15.000 Like a hippie bookstore.

00:03:17.000 Yeah, like...

00:03:18.000 Like wax and B.O. You call it tattered covered books.

00:03:22.000 You call it B.O. I call it possibility.

00:03:25.000 It's a weird vibe.

00:03:27.000 He smells like Woodstock. 0.72

00:03:28.000 But see, a lot of those dudes that are sober, and you know I love Keith, Tate to death.

00:03:34.000 I love both of them, but I love Tate to death.

00:03:36.000 Like, Tate's my brother.

00:03:37.000 I love that guy.

00:03:38.000 There was, um...

00:03:40.000 A lot of the Alcoholics Anonymous guys, any sobriety guys, they drink a lot of coffee.

00:03:45.000 A lot of coffee.

00:03:45.000 That's where they're getting there.

00:03:47.000 They're just getting a little charge, a manageable charge that doesn't fuck up your life.

00:03:51.000 But it gives you a little...

00:03:52.000 They like it.

00:03:54.000 Some of them like cigarettes, unfortunately.

00:03:57.000 Coffee and cigarettes together for alcoholics.

00:03:59.000 I'm like, boys, I don't know if you're doing...

00:04:01.000 I mean, I guess you're not ruining your life in terms of decision-making with the cigarettes like you would be with the booze.

00:04:06.000 You're messing your body up though more, right?

00:04:07.000 It's still a nicotine...

00:04:09.000 Arguably more.

00:04:09.000 It's replacing one addiction for another.

00:04:11.000 I don't know.

00:04:12.000 It depends on how much you're boozing though, right? 0.99

00:04:14.000 I bet you could kill yourself. 0.99

00:04:15.000 Well, you could definitely kill yourself in one night with booze, right? 1.00

00:04:18.000 And you can't do that with cigarettes.

00:04:19.000 No.

00:04:20.000 So I guess it's more toxic to drink.

00:04:23.000 A lot of those addicts become like marathon runners because the endorphins they get from running long, it's the same thing.

00:04:28.000 So they get all skinny.

00:04:29.000 I was with Joe Schilling yesterday.

00:04:32.000 And it's just so cool to watch that guy just light up to be just a world champion kickboxer and then just smoke a cigarette once in a while. 0.98

00:04:39.000 It's just like, I'm so fucking... 0.99

00:04:41.000 Tobacco doesn't fucking fuck with me, man. 1.00

00:04:43.000 I'll kick cancer in its ass. 1.00

00:04:46.000 I was like, how long have you been smoking? 1.00

00:04:47.000 He goes, since I was 12. Yeah, it's unfortunate, because I think it slows him down a little bit.

00:04:52.000 Joe's awesome even with it, but I definitely think it's a performance detriment.

00:04:57.000 It just is.

00:04:58.000 If a sport relies on cardio as a huge factor, why would you personally limit one of the biggest factors I mean, you can mitigate it somewhat with hard training and a healthy lifestyle and, you know, moderation.

00:05:13.000 Only smoke a few days.

00:05:14.000 You can mitigate it. 0.98

00:05:16.000 But think about a sport where people are trying so hard for little tiny fucking bumps of improvement. 0.96

00:05:23.000 At that level, yeah. 0.96

00:05:23.000 Talking about 1% makes you a world champion. 0.96

00:05:26.000 But sometimes, though...

00:05:27.000 But hold on.

00:05:28.000 Is there a difference between...

00:05:29.000 I mean, the amount of...

00:05:31.000 Decrease in performance you would get from smoking cigarettes versus the amount of increase in performance you can get from taking some things. 0.99

00:05:37.000 Like, what's this shit they keep getting popped with? 0.99

00:05:40.000 The Russian boxer just got popped. 1.00

00:05:42.000 Melodium.

00:05:43.000 Melodium, yeah.

00:05:43.000 What is it called?

00:05:44.000 Jamie, see if you could find that, please.

00:05:46.000 I think it's called Melodium.

00:05:47.000 Is it like a version of EPO? Like it raises your red blood cells?

00:05:51.000 It's similar.

00:05:51.000 Novitski explained it to me, but a lot of Russian guys are getting caught with it.

00:05:55.000 All of them.

00:05:56.000 But here's the thing.

00:05:57.000 This is what's important.

00:05:58.000 It was legal until December.

00:06:01.000 Yeah.

00:06:01.000 But going back to Joe Schilling, this is my only, and I don't advocate smoking ever, right?

00:06:07.000 My family members die from it, cancer, all that stuff.

00:06:11.000 But with Joe Schilling, a guy like that, if he smokes every now and then, I don't know how often he's smoking, but if he's smoking cigarettes...

00:06:18.000 And it allows him to be more free and creative inside the ring.

00:06:22.000 It's almost helping him.

00:06:24.000 How could cigarettes rely him to be more creative?

00:06:26.000 Maybe it calms his nerves.

00:06:28.000 He's been doing it for so long.

00:06:30.000 It's a ritual for him.

00:06:32.000 So it's almost the same thing with Jon Jones.

00:06:35.000 Man, you can smoke a little weed and still be world champion, the best man on the planet.

00:06:39.000 We don't have to take all this weight and wear Dockers and act like God's child.

00:06:44.000 Well, I've seen people who have to be very, very specific and correct and intense in something.

00:06:44.000 You know what I'm saying?

00:06:50.000 A lot of times the way they manage that stress, the stress of competition, the stress of living up to expectations, is they have one vice.

00:06:58.000 They typically will give themselves a recess.

00:07:01.000 Whether that's smoking, girls, whatever it might be. 0.99

00:07:03.000 Human beings tend to do that more than they don't.

00:07:05.000 Most athletes don't.

00:07:06.000 And I would say that was my biggest problem was everything had to be mapped out, had to be written out, plan for plan, minute by minute.

00:07:14.000 And if anything went wrong, I freaked out.

00:07:16.000 And I always wish I was more of that maverick, Joe Schilling, maybe have a cigarette, maybe go crash a Bentley with hookers and go game. 0.86

00:07:22.000 But don't you think that that's maybe... 0.65

00:07:24.000 Like, the cigarettes aren't necessary.

00:07:26.000 It's the attitude behind the choice to make cigarettes part of your life.

00:07:31.000 Correct.

00:07:31.000 That's what's necessary.

00:07:33.000 That was made, though, when he was much younger.

00:07:35.000 Yeah, but he doesn't have to continue that pattern.

00:07:37.000 No, he's a smart guy.

00:07:38.000 He doesn't smoke a lot.

00:07:40.000 I know.

00:07:40.000 Like, I noticed that.

00:07:41.000 Yeah, we've talked about it.

00:07:42.000 Yeah.

00:07:42.000 And I know he's tried to stop.

00:07:44.000 I mean, he's tried to stop.

00:07:45.000 Here's my feeling.

00:07:46.000 If you try to stop something, it means you want to stop something. 1.00

00:07:50.000 So if you try to stop and then you don't stop, that means it beat your ass. 0.99

00:07:54.000 That is an important part of your life where you can win. 0.99

00:07:58.000 You're in a competition with yourself and you can win and you don't.

00:08:01.000 This is my feeling about this and I'm not trying to be hard on people, but I think this is an important distinction.

00:08:06.000 When you fail yourself, When you decide to yourself that you're gonna take care of something and you're gonna kick an addiction, you're gonna do something, and you don't do it, you don't like yourself as much.

00:08:17.000 It's one of the most important things about accomplishments and about overcoming bad things in your life.

00:08:23.000 If you have something you're doing, like smoking cigarettes, and you don't kick it, you won't respect yourself the same.

00:08:30.000 The only thing I would say, though, is that sometimes liking yourself isn't so important for accomplishing great things.

00:08:39.000 There are a lot of people that...

00:08:40.000 Well, it's for happiness.

00:08:41.000 Well, yes, yes.

00:08:42.000 But, you know, sometimes happiness can be the great stopper.

00:08:45.000 You know, it's like Harriet Doerr, when she won the Book Award, they said, were you happy being a housewife for 35 years?

00:08:50.000 And she said, why would anybody who's happy write a book?

00:08:52.000 I'm not saying that you have to be suffering, but a lot of times I don't know that being satisfied, having peace of mind, and even being happy, which of course we all are striving for, sometimes that can be a hindrance to what got you Where you are in the first place.

00:09:10.000 And I'm speaking primarily, a lot of great books, screenplays, films made by smokers.

00:09:17.000 You're right.

00:09:18.000 I know what you're saying.

00:09:19.000 But when it comes to addiction, one of the things that they found that's way easier to deal with, so a lot of people say, well, stop smoking because it'll kill you, or stop smoking because it makes no sense, or stop smoking because you're not disciplined.

00:09:31.000 That tends to not, that might work for a short period of time, but people always go back to their set point.

00:09:36.000 And what does work better is Well, I don't think you should say always because a lot of people quit.

00:09:40.000 They do.

00:09:41.000 But what helps with quitting from what I have read and what I've talked to and even in my own experience is that you have to start associating The act of smoking or whatever your vice might be with something negative and associating and even feeling the difference.

00:09:59.000 I always say about people who want to get in shape.

00:10:01.000 If you could feel, if people are out of shape and eat a lot and eat shitty food, if they could feel how much better they feel, I'm just talking about the pleasure principle.

00:10:09.000 If they could feel what it's like to be in shape, I think they'd have an easier time going on.

00:10:14.000 The road to get there, though, be like, you won't realize how good you feel smoking until, I mean, the withdrawals and all.

00:10:20.000 It's going to take forever, man, to get through that point.

00:10:23.000 So that's a hard point to argue.

00:10:24.000 And I don't, you know, obviously, I never smoked.

00:10:27.000 But some people who have smoked, like Ari said, like to this day, he quit years ago.

00:10:31.000 But he said he still gets an itch.

00:10:33.000 Like, he'll see people smoking and he'll go, God, that looks good.

00:10:36.000 Like, it is a powerful, powerful drug.

00:10:39.000 If a guy like Schilling can't kick it, I agree.

00:10:41.000 I don't think he wants to bad enough.

00:10:43.000 But also, with this keto diet, I stopped all sugar.

00:10:46.000 I can't walk by Mrs. Fields.

00:10:48.000 Don't bring me by Mrs. Fields. 0.99

00:10:50.000 I will freak the fuck out, man. 0.97

00:10:51.000 So it's back now, because for a while you were saying you don't even crave it. 0.97

00:10:55.000 It's only if I go by Mrs. Fields.

00:10:57.000 I was at the mall with my brother, and I was literally like, Oh, dang, son.

00:11:02.000 Take my wallet.

00:11:03.000 Take my wallet.

00:11:04.000 Well, you know what causes more of it?

00:11:06.000 If you go into the mentality of scarcity.

00:11:08.000 So if you start thinking this is the last cookie on the planet, you're going to go for it.

00:11:11.000 It slows your metabolism down.

00:11:14.000 When you start going into scarcity mode, that's one of the things that they say about people that were incorrectly starving themselves.

00:11:20.000 They'll have little tiny portions of carbs. 0.95

00:11:22.000 Yeah. 0.99

00:11:23.000 And then your body's like, what the fuck are you doing? 0.99

00:11:26.000 And your body slows down because it's worried about losing resources because no food's coming in. 0.99

00:11:31.000 It can actually spark with you.

00:11:33.000 Yeah, your metabolism slows down. 1.00

00:11:35.000 It's like, we better hang on to this shit. 0.99

00:11:36.000 The only way fasting's good is when your body's in ketosis. 1.00

00:11:40.000 Because then your body just starts burning fat.

00:11:42.000 The fucked up thing about addictions is that this evolutionary biologist, his name escapes me, was talking about how the fact that, like an addictive mindset, people who are extreme, who need a lot of food, for example, or whatever, that kind of mindset actually served our ancestors. 0.89

00:12:00.000 Cavemen, the idea of finding, pinpointing what you want, which is that deer, and running after it for three days until it, you know, falls over, that need, that sort of reptilian Yes. 0.96

00:12:13.000 The problem is when you take away the fact that you have to chase a deer for three days, we still have a lot of that reptilian sort of caveman mentality.

00:12:23.000 And the most successful people in those societies now will tend to be the same people that have the same insane drive to do all the cocaine or eat all the food or drink all the alcohol.

00:12:36.000 Or they're addictive to working out or to their sport.

00:12:41.000 Most of the time, you know these people, Joe, and so do you.

00:12:45.000 Those world, those elite of the elite, the one percenters, they're not the funs to hang out with. 0.98

00:12:50.000 Some of them are not.

00:12:51.000 A guy like Michael Jordan, they used to say that Michael Jordan, if you beat him playing ping pong, he wouldn't talk to you for two weeks.

00:12:57.000 That's right. 0.99

00:12:57.000 He would fucking be angry at you and pissed at you. 0.99

00:13:00.000 People aren't fun to hang out with. 0.99

00:13:01.000 Yeah, and that's what produces that intense level of focus that creates a guy like a Michael Jordan.

00:13:07.000 They also don't like themselves, though.

00:13:08.000 There's a little bit of that in there.

00:13:10.000 But the question becomes, do you want to be happy?

00:13:12.000 Do you want to be healthy?

00:13:13.000 Or do you just want to be successful?

00:13:15.000 Do you want to be some miserable person that's laden with addictions that you may or may not be managing, but that is creating some success, like in the form of art, like maybe music or something like that?

00:13:25.000 I think a lot of musicians...

00:13:26.000 There's an argument for that, versus like...

00:13:29.000 I bet Nickelback eat a lot of vegan food.

00:13:31.000 Look, man, I told you.

00:13:35.000 I bet they drink fresh spring water.

00:13:37.000 I bet they get up early and do yoga. 1.00

00:13:39.000 Dude, they get so much shit. 1.00

00:13:40.000 They drop some hits, though, man. 1.00

00:13:42.000 They have some songs I enjoy hearing.

00:13:44.000 Me too!

00:13:45.000 There's that one song that everybody has sung.

00:13:49.000 They have one jam.

00:13:49.000 Which was?

00:13:50.000 But listen, no, no, no.

00:13:51.000 It's the theme, the rock star song.

00:13:53.000 Like, I'm a rock star.

00:13:55.000 My favorite version is the Cypress Hill version.

00:13:58.000 Yeah.

00:13:58.000 Do you wanna be a rockstar?

00:14:00.000 Like to be real version? 1.00

00:14:01.000 That's the shit, right? 0.99

00:14:02.000 That's the best version of it. 1.00

00:14:04.000 Nickelback Superstar is the bomb.

00:14:05.000 But Nickelback's got, they got their own version of it.

00:14:07.000 It's one of those.

00:14:08.000 Never heard it.

00:14:09.000 And it's a good song, unfortunately.

00:14:11.000 I'd love a sample of that song.

00:14:13.000 Let's sample up.

00:14:13.000 I've never heard it.

00:14:15.000 It's not bad!

00:14:16.000 I'm with Roken on this. 1.00

00:14:18.000 Fuck anyone who doesn't like that Nickelback song. 0.99

00:14:20.000 Look, I thought, here's, there is, but there's something that I think we all recognize about what they did. 1.00

00:14:27.000 Is that there's something sort of disingenuous or something, contrived or something, but it's still good.

00:14:35.000 But why does everybody get too mad at them?

00:14:37.000 I think because they're almost fake, you know?

00:14:40.000 Yeah, and I can't be friends with any of those guys at a glance.

00:14:42.000 I don't think they're fake at all.

00:14:43.000 You know what I think, man?

00:14:45.000 They're just too old. 1.00

00:14:46.000 They're successful, and I think a lot of dumb people like them. 1.00

00:14:50.000 It's not that they're not good. 0.99

00:14:52.000 I think they are good.

00:14:53.000 I think that you get associated with some of your fans.

00:14:57.000 There's that.

00:14:58.000 And someone started picking on them and using them as a punchline.

00:15:01.000 And then it became that punchline.

00:15:03.000 They are not as bad.

00:15:05.000 Look at all the bad musical artists.

00:15:07.000 And I say bad.

00:15:09.000 Obviously, taste is subjective.

00:15:10.000 And I'm just talking about my opinion.

00:15:12.000 Right.

00:15:12.000 Which is my taste, for me.

00:15:14.000 There's so much shit out there. 1.00

00:15:16.000 But people love it. 1.00

00:15:17.000 And it doesn't become a punchline like Nickelback became a punchline.

00:15:20.000 Just four white dudes.

00:15:22.000 Look a little too good.

00:15:24.000 Look a little too healthy.

00:15:25.000 Had some highlights.

00:15:28.000 Michael Bolton was talking about that.

00:15:30.000 Michael Bolton was saying, I became a punchline.

00:15:32.000 Michael Bolton was saying, I was just doing music and all of a sudden the right people started making fun of me.

00:15:37.000 Wait, did you see the guy with the hair?

00:15:38.000 Yes, and he said, people started making fun of me, and I just caught fire. 0.99

00:15:42.000 No shit. 0.80

00:15:42.000 Literally became, I was just writing my music. 0.80

00:15:45.000 Well, he had long hair, and he had like a turtleneck on him.

00:15:47.000 Of course, and he made fun of.

00:15:48.000 His voice isn't bad, but his voice is good.

00:15:50.000 There's some hair here.

00:15:51.000 Look at the hair.

00:15:52.000 Oh my goodness. 0.99

00:15:53.000 No shit, my man. 1.00

00:15:54.000 Look, Michael, you need a fucking mirror. 1.00

00:15:56.000 Ask yourself, what have you given these people? 1.00

00:15:59.000 He's on the come-up, though.

00:16:00.000 He's on the come-up.

00:16:01.000 I'm sure he is.

00:16:01.000 He's in those new commercials.

00:16:02.000 And he was on the Lonely Island video.

00:16:02.000 He's talented.

00:16:04.000 He's back.

00:16:05.000 He's funny.

00:16:05.000 He's very talented, man.

00:16:06.000 See, but he's rocking normal hair now.

00:16:08.000 Upper left.

00:16:09.000 Yeah, he's back.

00:16:10.000 Handsome guy.

00:16:10.000 Yeah, that's someone's dad.

00:16:11.000 That's perfect.

00:16:12.000 That's Caitlyn Jenner.

00:16:13.000 A little too much makeup, but looks like Caitlyn Jenner's short hair.

00:16:15.000 He's got teenage daughters.

00:16:17.000 You gotta go to his house and meet him.

00:16:18.000 You take his daughter to the prom.

00:16:20.000 I'd grab a beer with that guy.

00:16:22.000 Seems like a nice fella. 0.99

00:16:22.000 Yeah, he does. 0.99

00:16:23.000 He fixed the whole thing.

00:16:24.000 The hair thing was out of control.

00:16:25.000 That's right.

00:16:25.000 It's almost like the back and the bottom was to distract you from the top.

00:16:30.000 It's like you had some weirdness going on.

00:16:32.000 The top was just like weirdly cropped.

00:16:34.000 Just a hot mess.

00:16:36.000 Trust me, there's a guy who's tried to disguise baldness before.

00:16:38.000 That's exactly what he's doing.

00:16:42.000 That's what happens with guys.

00:16:43.000 With guys, if a dude is decorating himself a little too much, he becomes subversive.

00:16:48.000 We all go, hey man, the guy's got bracelets.

00:16:50.000 Why is he wearing bangles?

00:16:52.000 And what's with the tiara? 0.99

00:16:53.000 I don't know what the fuck is going on in there. 0.99

00:16:55.000 Why is that? 0.99

00:16:57.000 Is he competing for too many girls?

00:16:58.000 Native American deer skin outfits with the tassels, and he's got a bear claw necklace. 1.00

00:17:04.000 Yeah, get the fuck out of my face. 1.00

00:17:05.000 And a medicine bag. 1.00

00:17:06.000 Yeah, get the fuck out of my face. 1.00

00:17:08.000 He better be a shaman. 0.99

00:17:10.000 A dude who carries around potpourri.

00:17:12.000 He better be a masseuse and a good one. 1.00

00:17:15.000 How many bracelets can you have before you're an asshole? 1.00

00:17:17.000 God, that's a good question. 1.00

00:17:18.000 Do you have a gang of those bracelets? 0.99

00:17:21.000 Unless you're fucking Criss Angel. 0.99

00:17:22.000 Unless you're Randy Couture. 0.99

00:17:25.000 Criss Angel's the...

00:17:26.000 Nope.

00:17:26.000 Hey, Randy.

00:17:27.000 Randy.

00:17:28.000 I love you, brother.

00:17:29.000 Why are you wearing a scarf and a tank top?

00:17:29.000 No.

00:17:34.000 You gotta make up your mind to see what the fuck's going on. 1.00

00:17:36.000 It's fucking confusing, bro! 0.99

00:17:38.000 What kind of weather are you expecting, sir? 1.00

00:17:41.000 I don't know, but I'm ready, bitches! 1.00

00:17:45.000 Hey, you know what? 0.99

00:17:46.000 He gets away with it.

00:17:47.000 He does! 1.00

00:17:48.000 He gets a fucking free pass for everything. 1.00

00:17:50.000 He can wear the bracelets. 1.00

00:17:51.000 He can wear a scarf.

00:17:52.000 He can do no wrong.

00:17:52.000 Great beard.

00:17:53.000 What happened that made him say, I need this scarf?

00:17:56.000 Back that up.

00:17:57.000 A stylist, stylist, stylist.

00:17:58.000 Come on.

00:17:58.000 Look, he's got another scarf.

00:17:59.000 Stop for a second. 0.99

00:18:00.000 This is Randy fucking Couture. 0.99

00:18:03.000 Captain America, son. 0.99

00:18:04.000 Captain America.

00:18:05.000 With a scarf.

00:18:05.000 I like it.

00:18:06.000 Multiple time world champion.

00:18:08.000 One of the toughest guys that's ever walked the face of the planet Earth.

00:18:11.000 You don't need a stylist! 1.00

00:18:13.000 Hollywood got to him and went, you know what would make you look better?

00:18:16.000 Scarf.

00:18:17.000 He needs us.

00:18:17.000 Can I be honest with you?

00:18:18.000 He bought 50 of them.

00:18:18.000 He needs us.

00:18:19.000 I'm wearing a fucking scarf. 1.00

00:18:20.000 He doesn't need a scarf. 1.00

00:18:21.000 I'm going to get that scarf.

00:18:21.000 I know you would wear a scarf.

00:18:23.000 You son of a bitch. 1.00

00:18:23.000 Randy wears one, so why can't I? Holy shit, why is he in so many scarves? 1.00

00:18:26.000 He likes scarves. 1.00

00:18:27.000 The guy likes scarves.

00:18:28.000 I don't understand. 1.00

00:18:30.000 Maybe it's so if someone fucks with him, he takes it off and kills him with it. 1.00

00:18:33.000 Maybe just ready for a sandstorm. 1.00

00:18:33.000 I don't know. 1.00

00:18:35.000 Maybe he's not really into geech hoax. 0.98

00:18:36.000 He's really into geech hoax, but he thinks he'd be douchey to wear a black belt around his neck everywhere he goes.

00:18:40.000 Legit point.

00:18:41.000 Thank you.

00:18:42.000 I'm a legit point.

00:18:43.000 He came to 10th Planet in between career.

00:18:48.000 Before he came back and fought Tim Sylvia, he came to 10th Planet and he did a grappling match with Jacare.

00:18:54.000 Do you remember that?

00:18:55.000 He had a grappling match with Jacare.

00:18:57.000 Rico Ciapparelli, who was probably one of the most important guys in the early days of MMA as far as incorporating wrestling and submissions.

00:19:06.000 Rico was a huge asset to a lot of guys that were just starting out.

00:19:12.000 And to this day has helped a lot of fighters. 0.98

00:19:16.000 Mac Danzig was working with Rico before he retired, and it was his last few fights, and he was like, Rico is a fucking genius, man. 0.97

00:19:23.000 He knows so much. 0.94

00:19:25.000 And he was one of the early guys that was a wrestler that was tapping out black belts.

00:19:29.000 He was a really, really high-level wrestler.

00:19:33.000 In fact, he's in the Mark Schultz documentary, Foxcatcher.

00:19:38.000 Mark Schultz wrestled him.

00:19:40.000 I'm pretty sure.

00:19:40.000 Yeah, he won.

00:19:41.000 Well, Rico was NCAA champion.

00:19:43.000 I believe he was an Olympic alternate.

00:19:45.000 I'm not sure.

00:19:47.000 Super high-level wrestler, and then on top of that, super knowledgeable about submissions.

00:19:53.000 And he created a professional submission thing.

00:19:55.000 Yeah, he's a monster.

00:19:56.000 And so Randy fought Jacare in this professional submission thing.

00:19:59.000 He's so strong.

00:20:00.000 Jacare tried to leg lock him.

00:20:02.000 He had his leg. 0.98

00:20:03.000 He couldn't fucking straighten it out. 0.93

00:20:05.000 Randy's just doing leg curls. 0.98

00:20:06.000 He could not straighten it.

00:20:08.000 Captain America, son.

00:20:09.000 He's got these grappler strength from Mark Kerr.

00:20:13.000 Hundreds of years of squeezing things.

00:20:16.000 Before he fought Lyoto Machida in Toronto, it's the week of the fight.

00:20:21.000 I'm there doing an appearance for UFC, and I see Randy in the hotel.

00:20:26.000 I've maybe met him once before.

00:20:28.000 He goes, hey man, you're a good striker.

00:20:31.000 I need you to help me tonight.

00:20:32.000 This is the night before the fight.

00:20:34.000 I'm like, huh?

00:20:35.000 He goes, I need you to help me.

00:20:36.000 Okay.

00:20:37.000 He had some Jim Extreme Coutures in Toronto.

00:20:40.000 We jump in.

00:20:41.000 Two Hummers.

00:20:41.000 Where do they got him?

00:20:42.000 I have no idea.

00:20:43.000 Drive to this location.

00:20:45.000 Far as hell.

00:20:46.000 I'm like, what the hell am I going to do?

00:20:48.000 And so the night before the fight, he's doing rounds, son.

00:20:52.000 You know how most guys just do like, you know, he's already made weight.

00:20:54.000 You know how most guys just kind of break their wind and loosen up?

00:20:58.000 Oh, not Captain America.

00:21:00.000 Oh, no.

00:21:00.000 He had all his coaches there, and his striking coach couldn't get into the country for whatever reason.

00:21:06.000 So they had old big brown hair hold mitts for him.

00:21:09.000 I don't hold mitts.

00:21:10.000 I don't know if they know that.

00:21:10.000 I hit mitts.

00:21:11.000 I don't fucking hold mitts. 0.99

00:21:12.000 But they're like, we need to stand southpaw. 0.98

00:21:16.000 And every minute, a new guy's gonna rotate in on Randy for five rounds.

00:21:19.000 I was like, the night before the fight? 0.99

00:21:21.000 But Randy Couture, I'm like, fuck it, I'm gonna do whatever this guy says. 0.99

00:21:24.000 So his coach would go and different guys would go and be different in situations. 1.00

00:21:27.000 And I'm trying to hold mitts.

00:21:29.000 Mind you, I've never, I don't hold mitts.

00:21:31.000 I have to stand southpaw like a little machida.

00:21:33.000 Oh, and Randy isn't hitting him like just feeling out. 0.99

00:21:36.000 This dude fucked me up. 0.99

00:21:39.000 I mean, boom! 1.00

00:21:40.000 Hit me in the chin, the nose, bloody nose, pick me up, slam me, and I'm supposed to just let him do whatever he wants. 1.00

00:21:46.000 This dude fucked me up. 1.00

00:21:48.000 Every round, I'm like, God. 1.00

00:21:50.000 So he wants you to hit paths and then shoot doubles, and he's going to shoot doubles on you and take you down and hit you as well?

00:21:56.000 Yeah, he was doing this setup where he would, it was like a straight right, left hook, and then he'd get in on a single leg.

00:22:02.000 And I was like, God, man, when you're coming and striking, I feel like you're open for it.

00:22:07.000 Because his setup, again, I don't know Raina, I didn't train with him before that, so I I didn't feel like I was in a position to say anything, but I was like, God, I feel like you're opening yourself up with Leota, man.

00:22:16.000 He's not going to be there.

00:22:17.000 Like, you're coming straight at him.

00:22:18.000 He's not going to be there.

00:22:19.000 I told his coach that, and they're like, no, he got this.

00:22:22.000 You know, he's been there before.

00:22:22.000 I was like, yeah, for sure.

00:22:23.000 It's Randy Couture.

00:22:24.000 Pan watching the fight.

00:22:26.000 Tooth!

00:22:26.000 Couture!

00:22:27.000 See ya!

00:22:28.000 Yeah, he got knocked out. 1.00

00:22:29.000 I thought he was going to get on the mic and be like, way to go, Shob, you son of a bitch. 1.00

00:22:33.000 Jumping front kick is what I think it was. 1.00

00:22:35.000 Yeah, that's exactly what it was.

00:22:36.000 That was in Toronto.

00:22:37.000 That was the biggest event ever.

00:22:39.000 How about what Jacare did to Vitor this weekend? 1.00

00:22:43.000 Damn. 1.00

00:22:43.000 Yeah, he's a monster. 1.00

00:22:45.000 I don't think that was very surprising, though.

00:22:46.000 Well, this is the Vitor you're looking at.

00:22:50.000 This Vitor that you're looking at right now is a Vitor with diminished hormone levels.

00:22:54.000 He's 39 off TRT. What do you think was going to happen?

00:22:56.000 His legs look so skinny and his ass wasn't there anymore. 0.99

00:23:00.000 You can't... 0.99

00:23:01.000 There's only so much your body can do if you're not supplementing your hormones after a certain age. 0.58

00:23:08.000 And when you see guys that fucked with steroids most of their life and then tried to operate off of them, you have real problems just kick-starting your endocrine system. 0.78

00:23:20.000 Except for our boy Overeem. 0.97

00:23:22.000 Well, no, no, no, no.

00:23:23.000 Testing?

00:23:24.000 Well, he's figured out a way to get down to 240 pounds.

00:23:24.000 What's up?

00:23:29.000 He's younger a little bit than Vitor, first of all, but he's figured out a way to get down to 240, and maybe he doesn't have as much power. 0.92

00:23:35.000 Well, I think what he's realizing now is technically, like as a striker, he is at a fucking very high level.

00:23:43.000 I think he's made mistakes.

00:23:45.000 He's made mistakes in some of his fights, mistakes in his approaches, mistakes in how big he tried to be, or running out of gas, like in the Travis Brown fight when Travis caught him with that front kick to the face. 0.98

00:23:57.000 He would try to finish guys off, and if he didn't finish guys off, he'd kind of be fucked. 0.95

00:24:01.000 And now, you know, he's relying on skills. 0.99

00:24:03.000 It's also with Winklejohn. 0.98

00:24:04.000 That fucking Jackson team, man, there's a lot of great people for him to train with. 0.99

00:24:09.000 He's relying on skills. 0.99

00:24:10.000 I'm just saying, now that he's one of the guys where you see drug testing kick in, and obviously he looks completely different, but now he has to adapt the way he fights.

00:24:18.000 He has more skills in the heavyweight division than anyone else when he comes striking.

00:24:23.000 A K-1 champion?

00:24:24.000 It's not even close.

00:24:25.000 He won the Grand Prix. 0.97

00:24:26.000 Not even fucking close. 0.94

00:24:27.000 He's beating the best in the world. 0.84

00:24:29.000 His technique is so fun to watch and Donald will spar with him and says he just learns watching the guy.

00:24:34.000 But this is what I'm saying is he's a guy where this strict drug testing kicks in.

00:24:39.000 You can see a physical change and he's still doing well.

00:24:42.000 Well, he's better.

00:24:42.000 He's better.

00:24:43.000 He fights more caution.

00:24:44.000 Yes.

00:24:45.000 He's fighting really smart.

00:24:46.000 I'd say smarter, not cautiously.

00:24:47.000 Way smarter.

00:24:48.000 Because he used to come in like a meathead because he had so much power.

00:24:50.000 Yeah, exactly.

00:24:51.000 And that allowed him to get clipped.

00:24:54.000 And I think that when you're seeing him fight now, like especially, perfect example is Junior Dos Santos.

00:24:59.000 Like he knocked Junior Dos Santos out and a lot of people are like, God, maybe Junior's Maybe he's done.

00:25:04.000 Maybe he's just not the same anymore.

00:25:05.000 Then Junior comes back and fights Ben Rothwell and looks better than he's ever looked. 0.98

00:25:09.000 So Junior looks fantastic and then you realize, oh, Overeem's fucking good. 0.96

00:25:14.000 He's good. 0.72

00:25:15.000 So explain to me why Grand Prix K1 champion is just so much better.

00:25:19.000 It's the biggest of the big of all, especially at the time when he did it.

00:25:23.000 It doesn't exist anymore.

00:25:24.000 But at the time when he won it, it was Badur Hari, Gokhan Saki, the fucking best of the best.

00:25:31.000 Peter Ertz, these guys that won it. 0.80

00:25:34.000 The guys that were there.

00:25:35.000 And he won it. 0.62

00:25:37.000 Jerome LeBan or Ernesto, when you go back to like the history of K1, goddamn Andy Hoog, some of the greatest strikers of all time, the most entertaining, exciting, wild, crazy fights between heavyweights, and they would knock each other out all the time! 0.96

00:25:53.000 Yeah, Peter Archer, Sam Schilt, I mean, you got some monsters. 0.88

00:25:57.000 Oh my god, Sammy Schilt, good luck trying to get in on that guy. 0.99

00:26:00.000 Seven feet tall, he would front kick the shit out of you. 0.99

00:26:04.000 How the fuck did he not play professional basketball? 1.00

00:26:06.000 Well, dude, he was such a good kickboxer. 0.99

00:26:08.000 I just wish there was more money in kickboxing.

00:26:10.000 Yeah.

00:26:10.000 Especially back then.

00:26:11.000 Seven feet tall.

00:26:12.000 Do you remember when Karatanov took him down and mounted him and just punched him in his same eye over and over again?

00:26:17.000 He was screaming. 0.99

00:26:19.000 You bet your sweet ass that I do. 0.99

00:26:20.000 Dude, that was one of the most disturbing... 0.99

00:26:24.000 Like, finishes of a fight.

00:26:26.000 Karatanov took Semishilt down, got on top of him. 0.87

00:26:29.000 Karatanov was a monster. 0.99

00:26:31.000 Scared the shit out of him. 1.00

00:26:32.000 He was very scary. 0.82

00:26:33.000 Because some Russian military dude.

00:26:35.000 And he was beating Semishilt like he was torturing a prisoner. 0.95

00:26:39.000 Like, I'm not even kidding, man.

00:26:41.000 He, like, found, like, he isolated him, got on top of him, pinned him down, and then kept hitting him in his cut eye.

00:26:48.000 He had the same eye, though.

00:26:50.000 Yeah, the same eye.

00:26:50.000 Just hitting the same eye.

00:26:51.000 And Sammy Schilt was just screaming at one point.

00:26:53.000 Prisoner of War style.

00:26:54.000 Yeah. 0.99

00:26:55.000 Like, he had some info that fucking our boy needed. 0.99

00:26:57.000 It wasn't good, man. 0.99

00:26:58.000 It wasn't good.

00:26:59.000 There was something crazy about it.

00:27:00.000 Oh, no.

00:27:01.000 It was like, whoa.

00:27:02.000 Then he came into Strikeforce and did work, too.

00:27:05.000 None of that.

00:27:06.000 Well, we thought Orlovsky was done after he smooshed Orlovsky.

00:27:09.000 Remember?

00:27:09.000 Phew.

00:27:10.000 He straight-merked Olofsky.

00:27:13.000 I mean, he's a K-1 striker.

00:27:14.000 Karitanov's a beast.

00:27:15.000 It's a whole different thing.

00:27:16.000 Yeah, I mean, he's not the best of K-1.

00:27:18.000 You know, he gets beat by the best guys in K-1, but he's at a super high level. 0.96

00:27:21.000 His striking is no fucking joke. 0.87

00:27:23.000 For MMA, it was really good, too, because he did a lot of box and had good defense. 0.99

00:27:27.000 Beat the fuck out of Overeem. 0.98

00:27:29.000 Beat the fuck out of Overeem. 1.00

00:27:30.000 Knocked him outstanding. 1.00

00:27:32.000 Cracked him, had him running away from him.

00:27:34.000 Running away from him, and then he folds against...

00:27:36.000 And then when they bought Strikeforce, they just never moved him over.

00:27:40.000 Yeah, I guess not.

00:27:41.000 I wonder what happened.

00:27:42.000 I think he had some injuries for a while, too, I believe.

00:27:44.000 I believe he had some issues, and he gained a lot of weight because of it.

00:27:48.000 Remember he got real heavy?

00:27:49.000 Yeah, because he lost in the heavyweight Grand Prix that DC won.

00:27:53.000 He was in that, and he lost.

00:27:55.000 What do you think is going to happen?

00:27:57.000 I want to say Barnett.

00:27:59.000 And Barnett beat him.

00:28:00.000 Am I right on that, Jimmy?

00:28:02.000 Or am I going crazy?

00:28:03.000 I don't remember that fight.

00:28:04.000 What do you think is going to happen when Stipe fights over him?

00:28:09.000 That's next, I think, 100%.

00:28:10.000 Because if you look at their scheduling too, they both fought around the same time.

00:28:16.000 Overeem's next.

00:28:17.000 He's won four in a row.

00:28:18.000 He's the guy for the job.

00:28:19.000 They're both there.

00:28:20.000 I think you have to wait until Travis Brown fights Cain Velasquez.

00:28:24.000 But this is my thought.

00:28:27.000 Cain Velasquez, if he beats Travis Brown in some spectacular way, they're going to be calling for him to fight for the title.

00:28:33.000 That's the toughest fight, I think, for Miosic, only because Travis will be in his grill.

00:28:39.000 Travis or Cain?

00:28:40.000 I'm sorry, I'm sorry, Cain.

00:28:41.000 If Cain is in shape in that cardio thing and just in his grill, boxing, getting close, and wrestling, he's probably at least as good a wrestler or a better wrestler than Stipe.

00:28:53.000 Cain is overwhelming.

00:28:54.000 Yeah.

00:28:55.000 As a person who's watched fighters.

00:28:57.000 Not close?

00:28:58.000 As a person who's watched fighters my whole life, like watching the UFC, all the thousands of fights, I've never seen a heavyweight that can put the kind of pressure on somebody that Cain can.

00:29:09.000 He's just different.

00:29:10.000 His cardio is just different.

00:29:11.000 It's crazy.

00:29:12.000 It's like he's got double lungs.

00:29:14.000 I'm not even joking, man.

00:29:16.000 I've been overwhelmed watching his fights before.

00:29:18.000 It could be an argument he's number one, best heavyweight of all time.

00:29:21.000 You could argue that.

00:29:21.000 I do argue that.

00:29:22.000 Oh, do you?

00:29:23.000 People get mad at me.

00:29:24.000 They say, Fedor's number one.

00:29:26.000 Nah.

00:29:27.000 Maybe.

00:29:27.000 No, I don't think so.

00:29:29.000 Look, I really think that you have to be open-minded about this number one debate.

00:29:35.000 And I think until Verdum just got knocked out, Verdum is in the running for the debate.

00:29:39.000 100%.

00:29:39.000 I mean, he submits Fedor.

00:29:41.000 In his prime, really.

00:29:42.000 Submits Minotauro.

00:29:43.000 And I don't think Fedor was in his prime, though.

00:29:45.000 That's why I disagree.

00:29:46.000 He was the first guy to do it when it was Fedor.

00:29:51.000 And then after that, I was like, alright, big bro.

00:29:52.000 He did get caught by Fedor.

00:29:54.000 But I think he was already on the slide.

00:29:56.000 He was, but there was still that kind of prestige of Fedor. 1.00

00:30:00.000 Like, after he lost that, and then it's like, oh, fuck it. 0.99

00:30:02.000 Yeah, we can beat this guy. 0.99

00:30:04.000 But the reason I'm saying this is coaches were saying that.

00:30:06.000 His own MMA coach, after he knocked out Brett Rogers, said that Fedor won with his old tricks, but he would have liked to have him for more time training.

00:30:16.000 Sure.

00:30:17.000 And he thinks he's not approaching it correctly, and he just won by being Fedor.

00:30:21.000 But he also caught Verdum with that old trick.

00:30:25.000 He caught him, knocked him down, and then the mistake Fedor made was he jumped into his guard.

00:30:30.000 But remember, he jumped in to pound him, but he caught him really, really well, knocked him down with the exact same timing that he did to everybody before that.

00:30:39.000 Okay, maybe.

00:30:40.000 Or maybe Verdum goes down on purpose the moment a punch hits him so he could drag you into his guard.

00:30:48.000 Which he does.

00:30:49.000 He's a smart guy.

00:30:51.000 Verdum is a very smart guy.

00:30:53.000 He didn't fight smart on Saturday.

00:30:54.000 He definitely did not. 1.00

00:30:55.000 Why the fuck would you run the face first? 0.99

00:30:56.000 Because he got tagged. 0.99

00:30:57.000 If you watch the stoppage, see if you can find the highlight.

00:31:01.000 Because this is something that I wish somebody brought up during the actual commentary.

00:31:01.000 I'll show it to you.

00:31:06.000 He got tagged right before he got knocked out.

00:31:09.000 He got tagged doing the same thing with the right hand.

00:31:12.000 He moved forward.

00:31:13.000 He was making these advances.

00:31:14.000 He got tagged with that right hand.

00:31:14.000 He moved forward.

00:31:15.000 And I think he was on Queer Street. 0.99

00:31:17.000 And I think he went running at Stipe on Queer Street and got knocked the fuck out. 0.98

00:31:22.000 And the way Stipe did it was... 1.00

00:31:24.000 A fucking work of art. 1.00

00:31:26.000 The angle? 1.00

00:31:27.000 It was like Anderson Silva and Forrest Griffin.

00:31:28.000 Baby step to the right and boom, right?

00:31:30.000 It was better.

00:31:31.000 It was even better.

00:31:32.000 His angle was sick.

00:31:32.000 It was better.

00:31:33.000 Obviously, his right hand was nasty.

00:31:36.000 It's also...

00:31:38.000 Verdum did get hit early.

00:31:40.000 And in Verdum's training, if you've seen him train, there's this competition within that gym.

00:31:46.000 When you get hit, it's like, whoa, gotta get him back.

00:31:48.000 I think it was more...

00:31:49.000 He gets hit and he's like a charging bull. 1.00

00:31:52.000 It was like, fuck this, man. 0.99

00:31:54.000 I think it's probably a little of both. 1.00

00:31:55.000 I agree.

00:31:55.000 A little of both.

00:31:56.000 Because I definitely think he got cracked.

00:31:59.000 And I'm like, whoa, that is a big right hand that he got hit with.

00:31:59.000 Cracked.

00:32:02.000 And it's in the same manner.

00:32:03.000 The same manner.

00:32:04.000 He's charging forward, he got hit.

00:32:05.000 That's how Aldo got knocked out against McGregor. 0.98

00:32:07.000 You've got to be fucking real careful charging forward. 0.98

00:32:10.000 It makes the punch harder. 0.99

00:32:12.000 Way harder.

00:32:13.000 You know, Stipe's knocked out some great guys, but he's not a knockout artist per se.

00:32:18.000 If you compare him to Mark Hunt or Roy Nelson, he's not a knockout artist.

00:32:21.000 When a guy's charging in like that, and then you're countering with right hand, it makes it seem way worse.

00:32:26.000 Well, here's my take on Stipe's power.

00:32:28.000 I think Stipe has big power, but I think he fights economically and intelligently.

00:32:33.000 He's a smooth fighter.

00:32:34.000 Like a good boxer.

00:32:35.000 He's a very good boxer, golden gloves boxer, but he's smooth and relaxed in the way he spars.

00:32:40.000 It's one of the things that makes him so dangerous.

00:32:42.000 He does things very correctly.

00:32:47.000 DC was on the commentary for the UFC recently and was talking about getting the rub.

00:32:51.000 You know, he was talking about that experience.

00:32:53.000 When you have a tough fight with someone, you get the rub.

00:32:57.000 And he fought Junior Dos Santos and they went to war.

00:32:59.000 What do you mean rub?

00:33:00.000 This is what I mean.

00:33:01.000 He was saying, like Daniel says, when you fight someone that's really good and they're better than you, even if you lose, it elevates you.

00:33:08.000 You get the rub.

00:33:09.000 Just by sharing the ring with them, just by competing with them, you realize how good you are, you actually get better.

00:33:16.000 And you realize how good that person is.

00:33:18.000 I think he got the rub when he fought Junior Dos Santos in a way.

00:33:21.000 Because he went five rounds with a guy who was one of the toughest of the tough.

00:33:25.000 A guy who was a champion who knocked out Cain Velasquez with one punch.

00:33:28.000 And he went five hard rounds with him.

00:33:30.000 And the decision could have went either way.

00:33:32.000 And took his best shots.

00:33:34.000 And I also think, to go back to DC's point and your point, with the rub...

00:33:39.000 I think at the UFC level, especially when you get in that top echelon, you know you're good and people are telling you you're good.

00:33:45.000 But when he beat Orlovsky, he starched him.

00:33:48.000 You don't learn much from that man.

00:33:49.000 When you go to a decision with a world-class guy, then you know.

00:33:54.000 You're doing something right.

00:33:55.000 You're camp.

00:33:55.000 You're doing it right.

00:33:56.000 You had good gas.

00:33:57.000 You realize what works, what doesn't.

00:33:59.000 So you learn so much more.

00:34:01.000 And he's going to, like you said, war with JDS. And we see him getting better and better.

00:34:05.000 Well, what's really interesting now...

00:34:08.000 Is, here's the dark horse that nobody talks about.

00:34:11.000 Stefan Struve is only 28 years old. 1.00

00:34:13.000 That fucking dude is gigantic. 1.00

00:34:16.000 He's seven feet tall. 1.00

00:34:17.000 And if he could put it together, and he put it together on Bigfoot Silva the other night and knocked him out.

00:34:21.000 I know the guy has a bunch of knockout losses.

00:34:23.000 I know he does.

00:34:24.000 But he knocked out Stipe.

00:34:27.000 Struve knocked out Stipe.

00:34:28.000 That was his only loss in the UFC. Dude, Struve, do not count that guy out yet.

00:34:33.000 Struve did an inside leg kick and then knocked him out.

00:34:35.000 He's got that heart issue and stuff.

00:34:36.000 Well, I don't know what he's got going on physically, but I'm saying that kid, if he puts it all together, when you're seven feet tall...

00:34:44.000 How long does it take before you even get coordinated right? 0.99

00:34:48.000 I mean, it's like you're sending a message, and it's got to go so far before it gets to your fucking hand. 0.98

00:34:54.000 Have you fought guys that are super tall, like Jack May and those guys? 0.99

00:34:59.000 Yeah, but the thing is...

00:35:04.000 Struve would be such a freaking handful if he could learn to use his reach.

00:35:09.000 But guys like Roy Nelson, when you get these upper echelon guys, nothing against Bigfoot, but off TRT or whatever, because he actually needs it, off it, I think anyone in the top 20 kind of fucks him up.

00:35:22.000 But with Struve, the real test would be who they'd give him next. 0.95

00:35:25.000 Well, Struve got fucked up by Overeem. 0.88

00:35:27.000 And Overeem, that was a super intelligent fight the way he fought it. 0.99

00:35:30.000 Took him down.

00:35:30.000 Beautiful takedown.

00:35:31.000 Gone on top of him. 0.96

00:35:32.000 Just ground and pounded the shit out of him. 0.98

00:35:33.000 The other thing about Struve is you gotta realize that kid has, I think, 40 fights? 0.96

00:35:36.000 Yeah.

00:35:37.000 He has a shitload of miles out.

00:35:38.000 Wow.

00:35:39.000 He has half a heart.

00:35:39.000 Well, that's...

00:35:40.000 And the mark...

00:35:41.000 Well, it's not that bad.

00:35:42.000 No, I'm just kidding.

00:35:43.000 No, but it's...

00:35:44.000 I don't know what he's got.

00:35:45.000 What is the medical condition?

00:35:47.000 I forget.

00:35:47.000 We have the same manager, so he deals with it all the time.

00:35:50.000 That Mark Hunt knockout, Jesus Christ.

00:35:52.000 Mark Hunt with that leaping left hook.

00:35:53.000 Shattered his face. 0.99

00:35:54.000 Oh, dude, Mark Hunt hit so fucking hard. 0.98

00:35:56.000 You've been caged, so I'd seen that, right? 0.98

00:35:59.000 It's fast, too.

00:36:00.000 He's so fast! 0.94

00:36:01.000 He's a beast.

00:36:02.000 I think if Stipe can get...

00:36:04.000 I'm curious to see if Stipe can get within boxing distance of Alistair and take away any of those kicks and how he sets it up.

00:36:11.000 That's going to be interesting.

00:36:12.000 Alistair can box, man.

00:36:14.000 Oh yeah, for sure.

00:36:14.000 He can, huh?

00:36:15.000 Better than Steve B. I'm not going to tell you.

00:36:17.000 Knocked out Junior with one punch.

00:36:21.000 He's the best striker in the UFC heavyweight division, maybe of all time.

00:36:25.000 So Stipe then is going to have to close that distance and box him, right?

00:36:29.000 Not necessarily, no.

00:36:30.000 Stipe could crack him.

00:36:31.000 Look, Ben Rothwell knocked him out in the first round standing.

00:36:33.000 Stipe has better footwork.

00:36:34.000 Anything can happen.

00:36:35.000 He has better footwork.

00:36:36.000 Alistair's been stopped a lot of times.

00:36:39.000 His chin's the question.

00:36:40.000 This is the other thing people forget with Alistair. 1.00

00:36:42.000 That motherfucker can grapple. 1.00

00:36:43.000 Oh, yeah. 1.00

00:36:44.000 He can wrestle and grapple his ass off. 0.88

00:36:46.000 So you want to go to the ground with him, you're going to be in a world of trouble.

00:36:48.000 Well, he won the Abu Dhabi European Trials.

00:36:50.000 And in Pride, he submitted Vitor.

00:36:52.000 He also submitted Mark Hunt.

00:36:54.000 He has a nasty guillotine, dude. 0.99

00:36:56.000 He's super nasty. 0.97

00:36:57.000 People always forget about that. 0.87

00:36:59.000 They think of him just as a striker.

00:37:00.000 But you want to go to the ground with that dude.

00:37:01.000 I don't think Stipe has a lot of submission work under his belt.

00:37:04.000 So Stipe and I trained for two years together.

00:37:07.000 That kid has submission defense. 0.99

00:37:09.000 So you know how Rashad has his black belt?

00:37:11.000 If you ask Rashad to show you a real specific offensive move, I don't think it's at black belt level, but his defense. 0.57

00:37:21.000 And Stipe's defense is nasty.

00:37:23.000 Super nasty.

00:37:25.000 He's really good at defense.

00:37:26.000 He's a very smart athlete.

00:37:29.000 Very good athlete.

00:37:30.000 When you have a guy who could probably be a professional ball player.

00:37:35.000 With Stipe?

00:37:36.000 He could probably be a professional ball player.

00:37:38.000 He didn't make it.

00:37:39.000 But he's at this level of an athlete.

00:37:39.000 Yeah, he didn't make it.

00:37:42.000 Now, what I'm saying is it's rare that you see a guy like that who comes over to MMA and fights super technical, super smart, who's also really, really tough.

00:37:52.000 He's also a firefighter.

00:37:53.000 Yeah.

00:37:54.000 Professional.

00:37:55.000 Full-time.

00:37:56.000 His head is the biggest head I've ever seen.

00:37:58.000 It's a large head.

00:37:59.000 Nicest guy of all time.

00:38:00.000 He's a great guy, but he's got a rare set of attributes, meaning that he's at pro, sports, athlete level, as far as his ability, his movement, and his intelligence, and his approach, and his training. 0.98

00:38:13.000 And then on top of that, he's tough as fuck. 0.99

00:38:17.000 Tough as they come. 1.00

00:38:18.000 Tough as fuck. 0.99

00:38:20.000 Like in this fight, let me tell you something, dude. 0.99

00:38:21.000 I watched this fight very carefully.

00:38:23.000 And one of the things that I was noticing was like how calm he was through everything.

00:38:29.000 Watch when they're staring each other down.

00:38:31.000 One of the things you really pay attention to is the shortness of the breathing.

00:38:35.000 If you watch people breathing during nervous situations, a lot of times, even if they look calm, you can sort of see this uneasiness in the way they're taking in oxygen.

00:38:46.000 You're sensing tension. 0.99

00:38:47.000 You don't sense any of that shit looking at him. 0.99

00:38:50.000 You know what's impressive, too, is he doesn't come from a mastermind camp. 0.99

00:38:54.000 No.

00:38:54.000 It's just his boys in Cleveland.

00:38:56.000 Well, he just might have a mastermind camp.

00:38:58.000 I mean, there's a lot of masterminds out there that don't have the right pupils.

00:39:00.000 I'm saying he's not from like a Jackson's, AK, ATT. He keeps his shit within Cleveland and does work and then goes and does a firefight. 0.98

00:39:08.000 And then saves people from burning buildings. 1.00

00:39:10.000 Who else is in that camp?

00:39:12.000 The girl.

00:39:13.000 Hardstyle MMA. There's also, isn't there, is Leslie Smith from there?

00:39:17.000 No.

00:39:17.000 It's not Raquel Pennington, right?

00:39:19.000 Isn't it Jessica Ai?

00:39:20.000 No, it's Jessica Ai.

00:39:21.000 Jessica Ai.

00:39:23.000 So, they have tough fighters.

00:39:24.000 It's just like, if a guy's like a really skillful trainer, and you know, you've only been doing it for a few years, you have to wait for the right guy to sort of walk through your door.

00:39:33.000 Oh, yeah, it's all about them walking through the door.

00:39:35.000 I remember that was a big thing with Eddie Bravo.

00:39:37.000 With Eddie Bravo, it took forever for him to find someone who could do his style And prove in competition that it's very effective, not just with him.

00:39:47.000 He had a unique style.

00:39:48.000 Is that Stipe's brother or dad, the guy with the mustache?

00:39:51.000 Yeah, look at that guy with the mustache.

00:39:52.000 I don't know, that guy's awesome, though.

00:39:53.000 But you talk about Stipe being calm.

00:39:55.000 Remember, he's fighting right now.

00:39:57.000 That guy's not that old, Brian.

00:39:58.000 Why are you calling that guy his dad?

00:39:59.000 I don't know.

00:40:00.000 He looks like his older brother.

00:40:01.000 35. His older brother.

00:40:03.000 I guarantee it's his older brother.

00:40:03.000 No.

00:40:05.000 Just some fucking thick dude. 1.00

00:40:07.000 You know, Eddie Bravo had a real good point about this. 1.00

00:40:09.000 We were talking about it on the phone.

00:40:10.000 He was like, Fabricio looked too relaxed.

00:40:12.000 He was coming up to the ring.

00:40:14.000 He was making that face that he makes.

00:40:15.000 What was that?

00:40:16.000 I'm so sick of that face.

00:40:17.000 Well, he's being funny. 1.00

00:40:19.000 He's being silly. 0.86

00:40:20.000 I don't think there's anything wrong with a fighter trying to stay loose. 0.96

00:40:23.000 I don't at all.

00:40:24.000 You know, I think that's one of the things that Fabricio does to have a good time. 0.96

00:40:27.000 He likes to make that silly face. 0.92

00:40:29.000 He's also been doing it forever, man. 0.99

00:40:30.000 He likes it.

00:40:30.000 He's the man.

00:40:31.000 Well, he's Fabricio Verdum. 0.99

00:40:33.000 If he won the fight and made that face, no one would say a fucking word. 0.99

00:40:35.000 If he went out there and head kicked Stipe Miocic, you know, no one would say a word. 0.99

00:40:40.000 Yeah.

00:40:41.000 But it didn't work out. 0.99

00:40:42.000 So when it doesn't work out, that's when everybody comes shitting on you. 0.99

00:40:45.000 Well, it's the same with Conor. 0.98

00:40:48.000 With Conor Nate.

00:40:49.000 Conor's walking out like, hey!

00:40:50.000 How about Ronda Rousey? 0.98

00:40:52.000 Same with Ronda. 0.99

00:40:53.000 When Ronda lost, everybody's mad at all the shit that they loved her for. 1.00

00:40:56.000 They loved her for don't be a do-nothing bitch and fuck you, I'll make it to the top, kiss my ass. 1.00

00:41:01.000 Yeah, now they hate her. 1.00

00:41:02.000 And now they think she's arrogant for that. 0.98

00:41:04.000 Same with Connor.

00:41:05.000 Of course. 1.00

00:41:06.000 Oh, you with your rich shit. 1.00

00:41:07.000 He's in Venice right now, driving around in a Royals Royce. 1.00

00:41:10.000 Yeah.

00:41:11.000 Wiling out.

00:41:11.000 Woo!

00:41:12.000 Look, I just, you know, it's just what comes, it's part of what people love about people bragging.

00:41:19.000 They want to bring you down, though, man, no matter what.

00:41:21.000 Look how loose Stipe looks.

00:41:22.000 Look how loose.

00:41:24.000 I mean, he's fighting for the title.

00:41:25.000 Nice and loose.

00:41:26.000 Look at that.

00:41:26.000 Moves away.

00:41:28.000 He could have been argued he should have got a title earlier, too, but he's just such a nice guy.

00:41:33.000 A lot of checking, too.

00:41:34.000 A lot of good checking of kicks.

00:41:36.000 His Muay Thai is very good.

00:41:38.000 Very educated with his movements. 1.00

00:41:41.000 Look, Fabricio's got some fucking nasty kicks, man. 0.99

00:41:44.000 Right there, his striking is much improved. 0.99

00:41:47.000 We saw it in the Travis Brown fight, man.

00:41:49.000 Fabricio's dangerous on the feet, man.

00:41:51.000 Yeah, the King Velasquez fight? 0.97

00:41:52.000 Dude, his striking is fucking legit. 0.99

00:41:55.000 He's long as shit. 0.99

00:41:57.000 And he's got confidence in it. 1.00

00:41:58.000 That nice switch kick there. 0.99

00:42:00.000 He's a beast, dude.

00:42:01.000 I think in order to be that dangerous of a fighter, you're going to have to open yourself up a little bit.

00:42:05.000 And then when you fight a real strategic guy like Stipe, you're going to get in a little bit of trouble.

00:42:09.000 Well, I think what happened in this fight in particular is that he forced it.

00:42:14.000 Yes.

00:42:14.000 I think he was in this gigantic soccer arena.

00:42:17.000 It's the biggest crowd in history in MMA in Brazil.

00:42:20.000 Look at that beautiful leg kick, though. 0.96

00:42:21.000 Both of them, though.

00:42:23.000 Yeah, the inside and the outside.

00:42:24.000 Nice jab.

00:42:25.000 Stepping it out to the...

00:42:26.000 Yeah, it's all nice.

00:42:27.000 Like, the technique is real nice.

00:42:28.000 But I think Fabricio was just so ramped up because there's all these people in Brazil, and I think he's a confident man. 0.96

00:42:35.000 I think he thinks he's the fucking best in the world. 0.94

00:42:37.000 He just has to get a hold of this dude. 0.99

00:42:38.000 There's a right hand he nailed with.

00:42:40.000 See, so now he's...

00:42:40.000 That's a great right hand.

00:42:42.000 He can, but now, look, he's forcing it.

00:42:42.000 Stipe can take a shot at him.

00:42:45.000 Because he landed it. 0.92

00:42:45.000 He's forcing it. 0.92

00:42:46.000 Yeah, so watch when he starts to force it.

00:42:48.000 He gets hit real hard, and then he gets hit hard and knocked out.

00:42:52.000 He tried that knee...

00:42:55.000 He tries forward, and he got a terrible single attempt there.

00:42:59.000 You're not getting Stipe on that.

00:43:01.000 He's a phenomenal wrestler.

00:43:02.000 He might have been just trying to make them work, or maybe open up possibilities. 0.97

00:43:06.000 Sometimes you drop for a single, a shitty single. 0.91

00:43:08.000 I think he's going to just get his mind off. 0.97

00:43:09.000 Stipe's right in range, so he's not afraid to just be right in your grill here.

00:43:12.000 He's not, though, B. He's not right in range.

00:43:14.000 But he's real relaxed.

00:43:16.000 Even the way he's throwing that jab.

00:43:18.000 Top, top, top, top.

00:43:19.000 He's economical.

00:43:20.000 And when you're economical in a five-round fight, it's super effective.

00:43:23.000 Beautiful jab, man.

00:43:23.000 That was a very nice leg kick by Fabricio.

00:43:25.000 But he's timing that jab.

00:43:27.000 Great inside leg kick.

00:43:28.000 And the jab also is super light.

00:43:31.000 He's just floating it out there.

00:43:33.000 Pop! 0.87

00:43:34.000 There's nice speed.

00:43:34.000 Watch where he steps when he jabs.

00:43:36.000 He steps to the side there like that.

00:43:38.000 Like, look at that jab.

00:43:39.000 See how light that is?

00:43:40.000 You know, there's no tension there.

00:43:43.000 You know what I'm saying?

00:43:44.000 Like, it's like flowing.

00:43:45.000 Hey, check that leg kick again. 1.00

00:43:46.000 Nice leg kick by Stipe.

00:43:47.000 Nice switch.

00:43:51.000 So right now Fabricio's realizing, okay, this is not an easy fight.

00:43:55.000 Boom! 0.99

00:43:56.000 That's it!

00:43:56.000 That's the one!

00:43:57.000 That's the one!

00:43:58.000 And that right here.

00:43:59.000 Bang! 1.00

00:44:00.000 That's the KO shot. 0.69

00:44:01.000 Now back it up again.

00:44:02.000 Just back it up just a little bit to where he's chasing him.

00:44:06.000 So watch when he's chasing him.

00:44:07.000 This video player is really...

00:44:09.000 You're correct, though.

00:44:12.000 You're right, I saw that.

00:44:13.000 You're correct, though, Joe.

00:44:14.000 I didn't see that until he got mad and he came at us.

00:44:16.000 He was wobbling.

00:44:18.000 Yeah, he got tagged hard with that right hand.

00:44:20.000 That's right.

00:44:20.000 And then he kept charging, and then he got face-planted with the second one.

00:44:24.000 Wow.

00:44:24.000 That first right hand had him on Queer Street, I guarantee you.

00:44:26.000 Because he's moving forward, and Stipe drops it in on him, and it's the same punch he knocked him out with.

00:44:31.000 And when Stipe throws a punch, and this is how you know he's good. 0.82

00:44:35.000 I mean, obviously he was fucking good, but this is how you know his technique's at a real high level. 0.96

00:44:41.000 His arm is like loose, man. 0.97

00:44:42.000 And then he throws it, and then as it gets to his face, he tightens it down and does this.

00:44:49.000 Smack! 1.00

00:44:50.000 Like, as he's moving away, he...

00:44:51.000 Like, it's a super efficient, like, really technical punch to throw it that way, moving back.

00:45:00.000 Pow! 0.91

00:45:00.000 In that sense, it's very much like what Anderson did to Forrest Griffin. 0.91

00:45:03.000 It's also calculated because he threw it twice.

00:45:05.000 And they both land in there.

00:45:07.000 You can tell they're working on that.

00:45:08.000 So he threw the left hook twice. 0.91

00:45:11.000 The right hand.

00:45:12.000 The right hand moving back.

00:45:13.000 Moving back.

00:45:15.000 Is he stepping to the side when he does that?

00:45:17.000 He had to.

00:45:18.000 Yes, but it doesn't even necessarily have to be that he planned it out and that was a part of the game plan.

00:45:23.000 I think Stipe does that.

00:45:24.000 I think he's a really good striker. 0.95

00:45:26.000 If you're looking at his movement, and I think you're looking at a guy who's super fucking determined, man. 0.78

00:45:32.000 Stipe is super determined. 0.80

00:45:34.000 And when you're a guy that's that focused, you're gonna get fucking really good at everything.

00:45:39.000 So after he gets that fight, look at that jab. 0.52

00:45:41.000 See that jab?

00:45:42.000 See how fluid it is, too.

00:45:45.000 It's so, like, everything he's doing is so relaxed and efficient.

00:45:48.000 You don't see a lot of jab.

00:45:50.000 You don't see a lot of jabs.

00:45:51.000 Like, my all-time favorite fighter, probably, if I had to tell you who I was most excited to see fight, is probably Vanderlei.

00:45:57.000 There's the right hand.

00:45:58.000 Boom! 0.99

00:45:58.000 See that right hand? 0.99

00:45:59.000 He's fucking hurt here. 0.99

00:46:01.000 Yeah, he got mad. 0.99

00:46:02.000 He didn't just get mad, his legs jolted.

00:46:05.000 Like, you could see his legs stiffen up when he got hit by that first right hand.

00:46:09.000 He got hurt.

00:46:10.000 And then the second one, faceplant some.

00:46:12.000 Stipe's a dangerous guy.

00:46:13.000 I'm a world champ!

00:46:14.000 He's not going to make mistakes. 0.99

00:46:16.000 Hey Cleveland, let's get our boy a goddamn parade. 1.00

00:46:19.000 No one wins shit in that town. 1.00

00:46:20.000 No shit. 1.00

00:46:20.000 Hey LeBron, you want to jack every other UFC fighter? 1.00

00:46:23.000 How about you tweet out about Stipe? 1.00

00:46:25.000 Your boy's from your fucking hometown. 1.00

00:46:27.000 He jumped off the fence. 1.00

00:46:28.000 He goes, I'm the world champ!

00:46:29.000 I'm the new world champ!

00:46:30.000 Yeah, man.

00:46:30.000 It was like coming into his mind.

00:46:34.000 Like, is this real information?

00:46:36.000 Hey, LeBron.

00:46:37.000 Did that just happen? 1.00

00:46:38.000 Did you step your fucking game up? 1.00

00:46:39.000 Fucking yeah. 1.00

00:46:39.000 I love it. 1.00

00:46:40.000 I love that guy.

00:46:41.000 Me too, man.

00:46:42.000 I love him.

00:46:42.000 I love what he stands for.

00:46:44.000 I love watching him as a fighter.

00:46:45.000 I love that he could do that.

00:46:47.000 I love it.

00:46:48.000 I love that he did it in Brazil.

00:46:49.000 Look at this.

00:46:50.000 Me too.

00:46:50.000 Watch this.

00:46:51.000 Watch how efficient.

00:46:52.000 Stooch! 0.99

00:46:53.000 See, it's like, tank!

00:46:55.000 Yeah, he just drops it in on him.

00:46:56.000 To be able to time it that good, too.

00:46:58.000 Look at this.

00:46:59.000 Watch the timing.

00:47:00.000 Look at that timing, dude.

00:47:02.000 He pushes his hand away.

00:47:03.000 Yeah, dude.

00:47:04.000 Pushes, and then with the same hand.

00:47:05.000 Did you see Overeem's tweet?

00:47:08.000 Crack! 0.98

00:47:09.000 Yeah.

00:47:09.000 Yeah, he wants to find him.

00:47:10.000 Yeah, he said, you're next, and he did that Bloodsport meme.

00:47:13.000 Love it.

00:47:14.000 See, that one showed both.

00:47:17.000 That highlight right there was the perfect highlight.

00:47:20.000 Step to the right.

00:47:21.000 Because it showed the first one, how much impact the first one had on him.

00:47:24.000 The first punch was a big factor there, man.

00:47:27.000 That first punch had him co-weird up.

00:47:29.000 Unbelievable, man.

00:47:31.000 So cool.

00:47:32.000 I like that you could still say Queer Street and you're not a homophobe.

00:47:34.000 No, Queer Street's fun. 0.98

00:47:36.000 You can't take that away from us.

00:47:38.000 It's just strange.

00:47:39.000 You're like, what?

00:47:40.000 Where am I? The heavyweight division's fun right now, man, because I don't think we're going to see a champ reign for a long time.

00:47:46.000 I want to make a shirt that says Fight for Queer Street. 0.98

00:47:49.000 Hey, how about Queer Street Fight Club?

00:47:53.000 I think that's sending out the wrong message.

00:47:56.000 Might be. 0.99

00:47:57.000 That's like a bat signal for dick. 0.99

00:47:58.000 That's what I'm talking about. 0.99

00:48:00.000 We'll teach you how to throw a right hand. 0.98

00:48:01.000 For anyone who likes dick, Queer Street Fight Club. 1.00

00:48:03.000 You'll learn how to throw a right hand and fuck guys. 1.00

00:48:06.000 Dicks are on us. 1.00

00:48:09.000 Time to come, guys. 1.00

00:48:10.000 Let's take a sex break. 0.86

00:48:11.000 I put up a picture the other day on Twitter of the Oak Ridge Boys.

00:48:14.000 Somebody sent me a picture of the Oak Ridge Boys because it looks like us.

00:48:17.000 One of them looks exactly like you.

00:48:19.000 It really does.

00:48:19.000 And one of them looks like you and me had a baby.

00:48:21.000 But one of the things that I was shocked was like, someone said, this looks like you and Callan.

00:48:27.000 But I go, oh my god, how gay were the Oak Ridge Boys? 1.00

00:48:30.000 Holy shit. 1.00

00:48:31.000 When did you see this picture? 1.00

00:48:32.000 You're going to go, that's not real.

00:48:34.000 No, that's real.

00:48:35.000 This is the actual album cover.

00:48:37.000 Wow.

00:48:37.000 They took a photo shoot for this show.

00:48:39.000 Holy shit. 1.00

00:48:40.000 It's hilarious. 0.99

00:48:41.000 You were allowed to feather your hair back then.

00:48:43.000 Yeah.

00:48:43.000 I appreciate it.

00:48:44.000 Check this.

00:48:45.000 No, that's Orleans.

00:48:46.000 Okay, Orleans.

00:48:47.000 Lord have mercy.

00:48:49.000 Well, Orleans, this is important because someone said to me after I posted the picture of the Oak Ridge Boys, they said they didn't have nothing on Orleans.

00:48:56.000 And they put that up and I was like, whoa.

00:48:58.000 That's impressive.

00:48:58.000 You ain't lying.

00:48:59.000 How about homeboy on the right and the bear cub on the far left?

00:49:02.000 Just a bunch of hairy dudes. 0.97

00:49:04.000 Waking and dreaming. 1.00

00:49:05.000 And look at this guy looking down at the other guy's dick. 1.00

00:49:08.000 Dude, you're actually looking down at this guy's dick. 1.00

00:49:08.000 Literally. 1.00

00:49:11.000 He's closing his eyes. 1.00

00:49:12.000 You're crazy. 1.00

00:49:13.000 If you don't think Orleans is doing a show, then fucking each other. 1.00

00:49:16.000 They just fuck each other during the show. 1.00

00:49:18.000 You just don't notice it. 1.00

00:49:19.000 You don't notice it because they're so gay you get blinded. 1.00

00:49:21.000 They wash each other's hair. 1.00

00:49:23.000 Dude, look at this.

00:49:24.000 This is us.

00:49:26.000 Look at Kallen, the far left!

00:49:27.000 The far right is Kallen and me had a kid and the kid likes mustaches. 1.00

00:49:34.000 Look at the guy's fucking... 1.00

00:49:35.000 Why does he have pantyhose around his neck? 1.00

00:49:38.000 What kind of clothing is that around his neck?

00:49:40.000 No, that's a straight tie.

00:49:42.000 That's a straight tie, guys.

00:49:42.000 I don't think it's a tie.

00:49:43.000 Look, it's got a tassley thing at the bottom.

00:49:45.000 With a pink shirt. 0.99

00:49:46.000 You're right, damn it. 0.99

00:49:47.000 See how tassley it is at the bottom? 0.99

00:49:48.000 It's a Randy Couture style.

00:49:49.000 Same stylist as Randy Couture?

00:49:51.000 Same stylist as Couture?

00:49:52.000 No, it's the dad of Randy Couture stylists.

00:49:55.000 That's it.

00:49:57.000 And you know why they have that little star on the right? 0.94

00:49:59.000 Because that dude had a boner that's poking out over the top of his jeans.

00:50:02.000 Those are some high jeans. 0.96

00:50:04.000 Those are high crotch jeans.

00:50:05.000 It was like a little broomstick poking out over the top of his jeans.

00:50:08.000 Those guys are awesome, man.

00:50:10.000 The guy that looks like me on the end here is really arching his back, Danny.

00:50:13.000 He's really arched up.

00:50:14.000 He's having a good time is what he's having.

00:50:16.000 The two guys in the middle, one of them is a magician, the other one is a nature guy. 0.96

00:50:20.000 Damn right. 0.98

00:50:21.000 The other one looks like a blackjack dealer. 0.99

00:50:24.000 The second guy is. 0.98

00:50:25.000 The far left guy looks like a guy who dies in some sort of crazy orgy where everybody does too much molly. 1.00

00:50:31.000 They were just having fun back then, making music and sucking dick. 1.00

00:50:35.000 I'm not mad at it. 0.99

00:50:36.000 And wearing shrimp colored jackets.

00:50:39.000 Everyone's so tight these days.

00:50:41.000 I know, right?

00:50:42.000 You can't Orleans it anymore.

00:50:42.000 You can't even have fun anymore.

00:50:44.000 Could you imagine if today, in today's climate...

00:50:47.000 But I would have thought that that climate back then was less tolerant.

00:50:50.000 I know.

00:50:51.000 Today is super tolerant.

00:50:52.000 It was, it was, back then.

00:50:53.000 Look, there's a national debate going on on whether or not women should have to go into the same restroom as transgender people.

00:51:02.000 That's a national debate.

00:51:03.000 Who would have ever thought that this country would be so concerned with hurting people's feelings that that would be a big part of the national debate?

00:51:10.000 Big part.

00:51:10.000 But if a band went out and did that...

00:51:13.000 We'd be like, get the fuck out of here with that gay shit. 1.00

00:51:15.000 It's true. 1.00

00:51:16.000 I would repost that shit. 1.00

00:51:17.000 You got the federal government now asking public schools that get public funds to create a separate bathroom for transgender people. 1.00

00:51:24.000 Okay, what's going on?

00:51:25.000 What's going on?

00:51:25.000 Is this just the internet?

00:51:27.000 Is it the pressure of groups on the internet?

00:51:29.000 Like, what is it about?

00:51:30.000 I think, like anything else, for the first time, the transgender community has a voice for the first time.

00:51:35.000 Right.

00:51:35.000 And any time you have that...

00:51:38.000 You're going to have people that get very, very loud and this is their chance.

00:51:43.000 This is their moment to say, hey, we're here.

00:51:46.000 We've been in the closet forever and you're probably going to have the louder voices in that community and even the ones that are more...

00:51:58.000 We're good to go.

00:52:24.000 By federal law, am I then allowed to go into a woman's bathroom? 1.00

00:52:28.000 Well, it becomes difficult, right?

00:52:30.000 The problem I have, B, is like, I have to be cool with everything.

00:52:35.000 It might be a little weird to me if, you know, there's a dude in a dress.

00:52:39.000 I'm not used to that.

00:52:40.000 I didn't grow up around.

00:52:41.000 And you're allowed to feel weird about it.

00:52:42.000 Or if Caitlyn Jenner's on the front of Vanity Fair.

00:52:44.000 Or how about Caitlyn Jenner now is saying, I might want to go back to Bruce.

00:52:48.000 No.

00:52:48.000 Did you hear that?

00:52:49.000 Yeah. 1.00

00:52:50.000 So, I know you hate that shit, Joe, but I'm just saying, to me, it's a little weird that she's on the front cover of Sports Illustrated. 1.00

00:52:56.000 I'm like, dude, that used to be fucking Bruce. 1.00

00:52:58.000 And then I get called a homophobe or something like that, because to me, it's a little strange. 0.96

00:53:03.000 And I can't have questions about it.

00:53:04.000 You can't force me to accept it.

00:53:06.000 You're right.

00:53:08.000 This is the way to look at it, in my opinion.

00:53:10.000 You know, we have a lot of different minorities.

00:53:14.000 Let's just take transgender. 1.00

00:53:15.000 They're a sexual minority. 1.00

00:53:17.000 Forever they have been relegated to the, you know, the shadows.

00:53:22.000 You had to keep it a secret.

00:53:24.000 You felt different, etc., etc.

00:53:26.000 We know the stories.

00:53:29.000 I think?

00:53:49.000 For people who think and act differently.

00:53:52.000 That's where you get people like Marilyn Manson and Prince and great artists.

00:53:57.000 So the debate becomes, how do you make those people feel safe without creating major inconvenience for the vast majority of us who say, we may not have the funds for a third bathroom.

00:54:10.000 Now you're talking about an entire different infrastructure.

00:54:13.000 So how do we work around this?

00:54:14.000 But we have the funds to set up electric centers for Teslas.

00:54:19.000 Well, it's a good debate to have.

00:54:21.000 I don't know what the answer is.

00:54:23.000 Bro, I meant to talk to you guys off the show about this.

00:54:25.000 I found the Mr. Hands video.

00:54:27.000 Well, let's get back to this, because I don't think we're done with this.

00:54:32.000 You know what I'm saying?

00:54:33.000 Yeah.

00:54:33.000 Look, I definitely think that there is a spectrum of transgender people.

00:54:38.000 And I think there's people that you wouldn't even notice.

00:54:42.000 And then there's people that look a lot like men.

00:54:46.000 Want to identify with women and people are gonna be scared of them and there's gonna be weirdness involved with that because Not because the transgender people might be creepy But because we know that there are men that are predators that are not transgender men that are straight That's what I worry about and if you give them the opportunity to wear a dress and go into the women's room and just say they identify with being a woman What they wanted on North Carolina and this is where it gets interesting is It's not that you had to be a transgender 0.60

00:55:16.000 person.

00:55:17.000 Please, someone, correct me if I'm wrong, because I don't think I am. 0.89

00:55:20.000 It's not that you couldn't go in the bathroom if you're a transgender person.

00:55:24.000 It's you have to go into the bathroom that matches the gender on your birth certificate. 0.87

00:55:29.000 Now, if you're born a woman, but you want to be a man, you can get that changed on your birth certificate.

00:55:37.000 Yeah, you can.

00:55:37.000 I didn't know that.

00:55:38.000 Yeah, apparently you can.

00:55:39.000 Caitlyn Jenner did it.

00:55:41.000 So if they do that, if they get it changed, I don't know how they could change on your birth certificate 60 years later.

00:55:47.000 Yeah, they do it.

00:55:48.000 Here's the problem.

00:55:49.000 Now we're in this weird semantics thing.

00:55:52.000 We're not talking about technical.

00:55:55.000 How fluid is gender? 1.00

00:55:58.000 I mean, we need to really define this before you just allow someone to wear a dress and go in a woman's dress.

00:56:05.000 Now it's how someone self-identifies.

00:56:07.000 And it's a very different area than the legislation that exists.

00:56:12.000 It's cloudy because now you're not talking about male-female.

00:56:17.000 You're not saying, hey, if you are in the pension plan in this company, because women live, say, 15 years longer or whatever it might be, you have to pay more into that pension plan. 0.57

00:56:27.000 As an example, that was unconstitutional because it was sex discrimination.

00:56:31.000 Now, these laws are concerned with How someone identifies.

00:56:37.000 It's very murky. 0.98

00:56:38.000 So you may have a penis, but you identify as a woman and you're taking hormones. 1.00

00:56:44.000 Now we're in a very, very strange... 0.99

00:56:45.000 But here's the thing, you don't even have to be taking hormones.

00:56:47.000 That's right.

00:56:48.000 You can just identify with being a woman and not want to do anything different than what you are right now and then go into women's rooms. 1.00

00:56:54.000 Isn't that the exception though, Joe?

00:56:56.000 Yeah, there's plenty of exceptions.

00:56:58.000 Well, because if you can say, ah, well, guys are going to put on dress and just to go look at little girls, but wouldn't that be the exception overall?

00:57:04.000 Always.

00:57:04.000 Perhaps.

00:57:05.000 Yes.

00:57:06.000 For sure.

00:57:06.000 Well, how many transgender people are using bathrooms?

00:57:10.000 That's the exception. 0.90

00:57:11.000 That's a huge exception.

00:57:12.000 But the exception to that is that they're going to go in there just to look at little girls or molest little boys.

00:57:17.000 You're right.

00:57:17.000 But if it's one out of a hundred, it's something we should talk about.

00:57:20.000 If it's one out of a thousand...

00:57:22.000 You can talk about it, but you can't make a decision based off the exception.

00:57:24.000 But you have to figure out what it is.

00:57:26.000 And that's where it gets almost impossible.

00:57:29.000 It's really hard to protect...

00:57:32.000 Women and children from creepy dudes.

00:57:35.000 And this is not a slight on transgenders at all. 0.90

00:57:38.000 We're not talking about transgender, we're talking about men who take advantage of that. 0.86

00:57:41.000 We're talking about heterosexual men who take advantage of a law. 0.54

00:57:43.000 This has nothing to do with transgenders. 1.00

00:57:46.000 Giving any possible loophole where a piece of shit creepy male predator is allowed to use a bathroom with a ten-year-old girl in it. 1.00

00:57:54.000 Under the sanction of the law. 1.00

00:57:55.000 Yes, under the sanction of the law.

00:57:57.000 Man, I don't know about all that.

00:57:57.000 Oh, no, I get it.

00:57:58.000 No, I'm not cool with it either.

00:58:00.000 Because when I send my daughter, Stephen Crowder, you're making a law for the exception in the first place.

00:58:05.000 To make a law that says that transgender people can use a woman's room is an exception. 1.00

00:58:09.000 Okay?

00:58:10.000 Because you are making a law about a very rare thing.

00:58:12.000 A rare thing that when you look at the entire internet and 7 billion people, you see millions of examples of it.

00:58:19.000 So you go, well, transgender community is strong.

00:58:21.000 We should recognize that they're being discriminated against.

00:58:23.000 And that's all good.

00:58:24.000 I think we all believe that, right?

00:58:25.000 Yeah, for sure.

00:58:26.000 But that is a rare thing to make a law for when you're dealing with how many women have to use that restroom. 1.00

00:58:33.000 So do you do nothing?

00:58:34.000 Hold on a second.

00:58:35.000 How many women have to use that restroom? 1.00

00:58:37.000 How many? 0.92

00:58:38.000 How many transgenders want to use that restroom? 1.00

00:58:40.000 What is the actual numbers that we're looking at before we start talking about this and having this goddamn national debate on it? 1.00

00:58:47.000 And creating new bathrooms. 1.00

00:58:48.000 Well, that might be the only way, but what are the fucking numbers? 0.97

00:58:52.000 Can we just get some data on what the numbers are? 0.97

00:58:54.000 Does anyone know?

00:58:54.000 Is there any actual numbers?

00:58:55.000 There must be. 0.90

00:58:56.000 So, then, how many men are sexual predators? 0.99

00:58:59.000 Well, that's where it gets really fucking easy. 0.99

00:59:01.000 All you have to do is go to those sexual predator apps on your iPhone. 1.00

00:59:04.000 Everywhere you fucking look, there's sexual predators. 1.00

00:59:06.000 Now, it could be a lot of different things. 1.00

00:59:09.000 I know a dude... 0.96

00:59:10.000 Who got labeled a sexual predator because he got caught taking a piss outside. 1.00

00:59:15.000 He went outside, he exposed his dick, he stepped outside of a bar and pissed. 1.00

00:59:15.000 Yep. 1.00

00:59:19.000 And because of that- It's ridiculous. 1.00

00:59:20.000 It is ridiculous, but it's one of those backwoods country fuck states. 0.99

00:59:23.000 And it was in like the 1980s or something like that. 0.99

00:59:26.000 And this guy got arrested- Took a piss off a bar.

00:59:29.000 Don't piss around a playground.

00:59:31.000 It's not just one guy that this happened to.

00:59:33.000 This happened to a bunch of guys.

00:59:35.000 Especially if you expose yourself anywhere near a school or something along those lines.

00:59:38.000 Don't piss around in elementary school.

00:59:38.000 That's what I'm saying.

00:59:40.000 Yeah, you're a sexual predator. 1.00

00:59:42.000 There's a lot of piece of shit men. 1.00

00:59:43.000 We all know what we mean by sexual predator. 1.00

00:59:46.000 The problem is, how do you define?

00:59:48.000 How do you define...

00:59:49.000 Look, there was an article that I read the other day about a guy with a beard.

00:59:54.000 He has a full beard, but he identifies as a woman.

00:59:56.000 He wants to be able to use women's rooms. 1.00

00:59:58.000 And he doesn't take hormones, but he is a woman.

01:00:00.000 He feels like he's a woman. 0.61

01:00:01.000 He doesn't want to have surgery, but he identifies as a woman.

01:00:04.000 Can't have that.

01:00:05.000 So here's how I feel.

01:00:06.000 My daughter's eight years old.

01:00:08.000 How about that?

01:00:08.000 I'll tell you.

01:00:09.000 So my daughter's eight.

01:00:10.000 The other day I had to send her into a public bathroom at the movie theater. 1.00

01:00:13.000 I assume when I send my eight-year-old into a woman's bathroom that she's going to be safe because it's going to be little girls and women. 1.00

01:00:20.000 If there's a dude in there with a beard who says he identifies as a woman, I'm not letting my daughter go in that bathroom until that guy's out of there. 1.00

01:00:29.000 I don't know who that dude is.

01:00:29.000 And you know why?

01:00:31.000 And he might say he identifies as a woman. 1.00

01:00:34.000 He might be fucking crazy, too. 1.00

01:00:37.000 There's also that possibility. 1.00

01:00:39.000 But he's not getting near my daughter. 1.00

01:00:40.000 He also might whoop your ass if you go in there. 0.99

01:00:42.000 Yeah, I also don't trust him. 1.00

01:00:43.000 A big bearded dude.

01:00:44.000 And I'm allowed to say that.

01:00:46.000 You can't have that.

01:00:46.000 And you're allowed to say that.

01:00:48.000 And someone will say, that's a woman, and you should say she's a woman.

01:00:51.000 No, I would say that's a man.

01:00:53.000 Okay, so when do we draw the line, man?

01:00:53.000 Can't do that.

01:00:55.000 When do we draw the line?

01:00:56.000 That's confusing.

01:00:56.000 When do we draw the line?

01:00:57.000 It's tough, huh?

01:00:58.000 This was a big part of the Fallon Fox debate, about Fallon Fox becoming a transgender and then fighting women and saying she's a woman now, with a man's frame. 0.57

01:01:07.000 And then it becomes a sociological or a political issue more than a scientific and a fight analysis issue. 0.99

01:01:15.000 Which is stupid because physically she's built like a man fighting little girls. 0.99

01:01:15.000 That's right. 0.99

01:01:19.000 There's a bunch of differences. 1.00

01:01:20.000 There's a shit difference. 0.99

01:01:21.000 Reaction time. 0.99

01:01:22.000 That one's easy to me.

01:01:23.000 Reaction time.

01:01:24.000 That one's easy to me.

01:01:25.000 And then there's also hips.

01:01:26.000 You know, the shape of the hips.

01:01:27.000 Yeah.

01:01:28.000 Power. 0.99

01:01:29.000 But then again, what the fuck do you do about someone like Gabby Garcia who's clearly taking male hormones? 1.00

01:01:35.000 Where does that fit in? 0.98

01:01:37.000 Look, if you're fighting against women, and if you're fighting against women who are just taking nothing, but you're taking male hormones, where's this line? 0.99

01:01:47.000 Is it penis, vagina? 1.00

01:01:48.000 Is that the only line? 1.00

01:01:49.000 Or is there a certain amount of hormones you take where you become a fucking dude? 0.99

01:01:53.000 And if you do it like Chasity Bono. 0.99

01:01:57.000 Chas Bono now.

01:01:57.000 So she takes the hormones.

01:01:59.000 She becomes he. 0.92

01:02:00.000 She becomes Chas. 0.98

01:02:02.000 That's male hormones turns her into a dude, right? 1.00

01:02:04.000 We all agree because she says it.

01:02:06.000 Well, it's Gabby Garcia on more or less than her.

01:02:09.000 I'd say different, but more.

01:02:11.000 But I would suggest that question becomes relevant only when it begins to...

01:02:17.000 Interfere with your everyday routine, rights, when it starts getting into situations where you're going to have to share, for example, public space, a bathroom, something intimate.

01:02:30.000 No, in sports, it's even more.

01:02:32.000 In sports, it's even more. 0.99

01:02:37.000 In sports, it's way more important because if Gabby Garcia's on some shit, she's fighting some poor girl who's just on the regular protein. 1.00

01:02:45.000 But that's why it's illegal. 0.98

01:02:47.000 It's not illegal.

01:02:48.000 It's not illegal in Japan.

01:02:50.000 And we're just assuming...

01:02:50.000 That's why...

01:02:52.000 Fallon Fox fought in America.

01:02:54.000 Yeah, that's a whole different situation.

01:02:56.000 Toss them all to Cyborg.

01:02:57.000 How are we defining gender?

01:03:00.000 Are we defining it by your own personal choices?

01:03:02.000 Do you just decide, I'm this, I'm that?

01:03:04.000 I feel like a girl.

01:03:05.000 I want to be Joanna, man.

01:03:06.000 I'm going WNBA. Let's talk about this.

01:03:09.000 If you looked at Cyborg this weekend, and she was fighting Leslie Smith. 1.00

01:03:15.000 Bless her heart. 0.98

01:03:16.000 You look at Cyborg and she's a woman, of course, but there is something about her physicality that clearly she just looks like she was built to fucking bang on people like a drum. 1.00

01:03:28.000 Have you ever seen her first fight? 0.90

01:03:30.000 No.

01:03:30.000 She didn't look like that.

01:03:32.000 Okay.

01:03:33.000 A lot of it is...

01:03:34.000 Genetically modified?

01:03:36.000 There's a lot of speculation as to what she did in order to look like that.

01:03:40.000 Here's one thing undeniable.

01:03:43.000 That woman works hard. 1.00

01:03:46.000 She runs six miles every day. 1.00

01:03:48.000 She trains like a fucking beast. 1.00

01:03:49.000 Apparently, according to her trainers, she has an insane work rate, right? 1.00

01:03:54.000 But...

01:03:55.000 She definitely has tested positive for something. 0.99

01:03:57.000 She's tested positive, and also now she is in the UFC, and I'm not saying she's taking shit. 0.98

01:04:02.000 We've got to wait until the drug results come back in Brazil this past fight. 0.75

01:04:05.000 But at 140, at 135, she's by far the best female fighter in the UFC. Until you beat her, you ain't shit. 1.00

01:04:14.000 Dude, the way she ran through Leslie Smith, her technique is flawless. 1.00

01:04:20.000 The credit has to go to Jason Perillo, who's our boxing coach, because at her level, she's been doing it forever, right?

01:04:20.000 Flawless.

01:04:26.000 To take a fighter that has that many fights and to give them this set of skills now, because notice, this is what was most impressive to me in that fight.

01:04:35.000 She didn't get hit.

01:04:36.000 She had head movement, footwork, angles. 0.71

01:04:38.000 She didn't get hit.

01:04:40.000 Cyborg gets hit when she fights.

01:04:41.000 She'll trade, sit, bang Mike Tyson style. 1.00

01:04:43.000 She had footwork. 0.80

01:04:45.000 Leslie Smith didn't land a single punch. 0.98

01:04:47.000 I see that one. 1.00

01:04:48.000 Oh, shit. 0.99

01:04:49.000 Perillo should be getting all the credit. 0.99

01:04:51.000 And also, I've never worked with Perillo, nothing.

01:04:54.000 I'm just analyzing his fighters.

01:04:56.000 With Bisping, too.

01:04:57.000 Bisping boxed Anderson Silva's face-off.

01:05:01.000 A boxing clinic.

01:05:02.000 I don't know if you could shake like that and say face-off.

01:05:04.000 Face-off.

01:05:05.000 I mean, he did drop him.

01:05:05.000 I really don't.

01:05:07.000 Exaggerate the point to you?

01:05:08.000 Yeah, he did drop him.

01:05:08.000 He dropped him, but he also landed the most shots ever on Anderson Silva.

01:05:11.000 Again, a veteran fighter in Bisbing who's been fighting forever.

01:05:14.000 What's the one common denominator?

01:05:16.000 Before I forget, the coach.

01:05:17.000 Do you think it was dirty when Anderson, jumping, kneed him in the face?

01:05:21.000 Or do you think that Michael Bisbing's not supposed to call him for a reset to pick up his mouthpiece?

01:05:26.000 That's on Bisbing.

01:05:26.000 Because before every fight, Herb Dean or Big John Colton go, listen man, protect yourself at all times.

01:05:26.000 That's on Bisbing.

01:05:32.000 Don't stop unless I come in there and stop.

01:05:34.000 We all know that.

01:05:35.000 But he's trying to say my mouthpiece, he's talking to the ref, and wouldn't you think, would you agree, like when is there a break in the action, technically?

01:05:43.000 If a guy is talking to the referee, and he's moving away, and he's not in exchange, he's like, hey, I'll drop my mouthpiece, drop my mouthpiece, is that a break in the action?

01:05:50.000 Or is he calling for a break in the action, and it could be perceived that he's calling for a break in the action because the momentum is not shifting his way?

01:05:57.000 Look at Paul Hart.

01:05:57.000 Correct.

01:05:58.000 You can't stop until...

01:06:00.000 Dude, I'm fighting to the death.

01:06:03.000 That's a bad term there.

01:06:04.000 But until a ref tells me not, it's on, man.

01:06:07.000 So when I hit Crocob, that's on Herb Dean.

01:06:10.000 Step your 40 time up, son.

01:06:11.000 Okay, but should he be allowed to stop?

01:06:14.000 See, the break in the action thing is ambiguous.

01:06:15.000 Here's my thought.

01:06:16.000 If you move back, you move back, and you put your hands up, and you go, my mouthpiece, and you put your hands up.

01:06:20.000 You're calling for a break in the action, and the referee says, that's not your place.

01:06:24.000 Your place is to compete.

01:06:25.000 Which is correct.

01:06:26.000 Or do they have to wait till an actual break in the action?

01:06:28.000 I think they have to wait till an actual break.

01:06:30.000 But why is that?

01:06:31.000 Because you should not be able to fight.

01:06:33.000 Look, you should definitely be penalized.

01:06:35.000 Like, did you see when Simon Marcus fought, Joe Schilling kept spitting out his mouthpiece?

01:06:39.000 So they took a point away from him because they thought...

01:06:42.000 Because he kept spitting it out, that he was tired and he was trying to take a break.

01:06:46.000 Which is what he was doing.

01:06:47.000 Some guys do do that.

01:06:48.000 So in order to stop that from happening, they penalize you.

01:06:51.000 Veterans do it.

01:06:52.000 But a referee, if he knows that your mouthpiece is out, he should stop the fight.

01:06:57.000 So it's real tricky.

01:06:58.000 He might be looking at something else though, right?

01:07:01.000 You really shouldn't be able to... 1.00

01:07:03.000 See, the problem is like lips and gums with teeth, with raw teeth, your face getting fucked up, man. 0.99

01:07:08.000 But Biz being in Anderson, we're kind of in it. 0.99

01:07:10.000 It was like, it was kind of in it and it came out and he's like, no, no, no, stop, stop.

01:07:13.000 He also was like, what?

01:07:14.000 Yes.

01:07:15.000 He turned and pointed at his mouthpiece.

01:07:17.000 Remember when Paul Harris with Nate Markor turned the ref and said, hey, he's got slippery stuff on his ankle and Nate just dove in and went, That's got to be on the fighter who voluntarily, unilaterally takes a minute to...

01:07:30.000 It's also not dirty.

01:07:32.000 It's not dirty because as a fighter, dude, it's a very dangerous sport. 0.98

01:07:35.000 I see any glimpse where I can get an advantage, I'm fucking going. 0.96

01:07:39.000 Like Floyd Mayweather and Victor Ortiz. 0.98

01:07:41.000 I have no problem with that. 0.99

01:07:42.000 That, to me, was fucked up. 0.98

01:07:44.000 It's not, though. 0.98

01:07:45.000 It's a fight.

01:07:45.000 No, no.

01:07:46.000 He came up and said, hey, man, sorry.

01:07:48.000 No, they already said sorry twice.

01:07:50.000 And he goes, come on, man. 1.00

01:07:52.000 Nah, it's bullshit. 0.99

01:07:53.000 It's not bullshit. 1.00

01:07:54.000 It's a fight. 0.95

01:07:54.000 You know what that was? 0.95

01:07:56.000 I'll tell you what it was.

01:07:56.000 Victor, he's at a mental breakdown.

01:07:58.000 He was succumbing to the pressure.

01:08:01.000 He was fouling Floyd.

01:08:02.000 He was head-butting him.

01:08:04.000 And he got penalized for it.

01:08:05.000 When he got penalized for it, he wanted to make friends with Floyd.

01:08:09.000 And in the making friends part, like, I'm sorry, bro.

01:08:12.000 Look, a lot of times you can't have that in a fight.

01:08:14.000 You can't have that in a fight because the disruption of your focus, it's adding in this emotional connection with this person.

01:08:19.000 Now this person's your buddy.

01:08:21.000 Like, hey, we're bros.

01:08:22.000 Let's go back to fighting.

01:08:22.000 We're bros, right?

01:08:23.000 And Floyd's like, fuck you. 1.00

01:08:25.000 Left hook, right hand. 1.00

01:08:26.000 Go to sleep, bitch. 1.00

01:08:27.000 And Ortiz is known for that. 1.00

01:08:28.000 Breaking.

01:08:29.000 Yes.

01:08:30.000 He just got knocked out by Berto.

01:08:31.000 Cold-blooded.

01:08:33.000 I think he's done, right?

01:08:33.000 Yeah, man.

01:08:34.000 Probably should be.

01:08:35.000 It seems like when he got really famous and things started taking off, like...

01:08:41.000 He didn't really have the same...

01:08:43.000 Yeah, the Expendables.

01:08:44.000 He was doing well against Berto. 0.99

01:08:46.000 The first five rounds, I'm like, shit, here he is. 0.98

01:08:48.000 Because you remember, they built him up as the next Oscar De La Hoya. 0.99

01:08:51.000 He was like the golden boy.

01:08:53.000 And then it just never worked out for him.

01:08:54.000 The two fights I want to see is Golovkin, Canelo, and I want to see Kovalev, Andre Ward.

01:09:01.000 Kovalev and Andre Ward's gonna be crazy.

01:09:03.000 That's happening for sure.

01:09:04.000 Yeah, that's happening.

01:09:05.000 God, I can't wait for that.

01:09:06.000 Andre Ward is so smart.

01:09:08.000 He just has to fight more.

01:09:08.000 He's so smart, but there might not be enough.

01:09:11.000 Might not be enough against Kovalev, man.

01:09:13.000 It's so hard.

01:09:14.000 Well, he's not just so hard. 1.00

01:09:15.000 He's skillful as fuck. 1.00

01:09:17.000 He killed a guy. 1.00

01:09:17.000 Yeah. 1.00

01:09:18.000 Killed a guy in the ring.

01:09:19.000 And he doesn't seem to bother at all. 1.00

01:09:20.000 No, he doesn't give a fuck. 1.00

01:09:21.000 How about, and it's kind of stupid to talk about, but it has legs. 1.00

01:09:25.000 Floyd Mayweather, Conor McGregor. 0.98

01:09:29.000 It doesn't have any legs.

01:09:30.000 It kind of does.

01:09:31.000 It does.

01:09:31.000 It kind of does.

01:09:32.000 You know why?

01:09:33.000 Because Floyd wants it.

01:09:34.000 It doesn't matter.

01:09:36.000 UFC's not going to let it happen.

01:09:37.000 Well, but see, the only reason why I disagree with you there is because Dana goes, if Floyd wants to make that fight happen, call me.

01:09:44.000 Dana's a businessman.

01:09:45.000 They care about money.

01:09:46.000 You know how big that fight would be?

01:09:48.000 How much money do you think they could make if Floyd Mayweather fights Conor McGregor?

01:09:52.000 Biggest pay-per-view of all time?

01:09:54.000 No.

01:09:54.000 Isn't that crazy?

01:09:55.000 You don't think so?

01:09:56.000 No.

01:09:58.000 Easily!

01:09:58.000 It might be.

01:09:59.000 What are you knowing?

01:09:59.000 It might be.

01:10:00.000 Boxing, boxing, boxing.

01:10:02.000 What are you knowing?

01:10:02.000 Conor McGregor's the biggest draw already in UFC. Mayweather's the biggest pay-per-view draw in boxing of all time.

01:10:08.000 You mixed the world.

01:10:09.000 Everyone would tune in, including your dad.

01:10:11.000 I would tune in.

01:10:12.000 You tell me you wouldn't tune in?

01:10:13.000 No, because I would... 1.00

01:10:14.000 You're full of shit! 1.00

01:10:15.000 You're so full of shit. 1.00

01:10:16.000 It's not an interesting fight. 1.00

01:10:18.000 It's a very uninteresting fight.

01:10:19.000 You should have taken two hits instead of a little baby fake hit. 1.00

01:10:21.000 Very uninteresting fight.

01:10:22.000 No, it's fascinating.

01:10:24.000 I'm going to spark up his joint.

01:10:25.000 So what would happen is Floyd Mayweather would box with Conor McGregor and basically move around and be like, all right, here goes, and it'd be a spectacle.

01:10:32.000 It's just not a fight.

01:10:33.000 It wouldn't be a fight. 1.00

01:10:35.000 What are you, a fucking... 1.00

01:10:36.000 Party Pooper? 1.00

01:10:38.000 Pissing in our Cheerios.

01:10:39.000 This is the thing.

01:10:40.000 You've got to remember, the one thing that Dana and Floyd Mayweather, who would be responsible for putting this fight together, and Conor for that matter, all they care about is money and numbers. 0.99

01:10:50.000 That fight would be money and fucking numbers. 0.92

01:10:53.000 It would break Pacquiao Mayweather, can't it? 0.97

01:10:55.000 Okay, I know, but what I'm saying is that how would they do in that fight?

01:11:01.000 So Floyd probably could knock him out anytime he wanted, right?

01:11:04.000 No.

01:11:05.000 No.

01:11:06.000 Conor has a very good chin.

01:11:07.000 I mean, Conor got knocked out by Nate Diaz, or he got knocked down and hurt, stunned, wobbled by Nate Diaz.

01:11:12.000 Yeah.

01:11:14.000 Little gloves, first of all.

01:11:15.000 Nate's a really good puncher.

01:11:17.000 Nate's a big guy.

01:11:18.000 Nate's fought at 170. He's a lot bigger than Floyd, like physically a lot bigger.

01:11:22.000 Way bigger.

01:11:22.000 Yeah.

01:11:23.000 But...

01:11:23.000 Floyd is a guy who's broken his hands many many times, and he's not known for like really uncorking all of his might and trying to knock guys out.

01:11:31.000 Not a knockout artist in the least bit.

01:11:32.000 But he could.

01:11:34.000 He certainly could.

01:11:35.000 You know, it's not that Floyd doesn't hit real hard, but when you box real smart, knockouts come. 0.92

01:11:41.000 The opportunity comes, like the Ricky Hatton fight.

01:11:43.000 That's a perfect example.

01:11:44.000 That knockout came.

01:11:46.000 It's not like he went looking for it. 0.99

01:11:47.000 The Victor Ortiz fight, Victor just fucked up. 0.99

01:11:49.000 And he just left-hooked right-handed. 1.00

01:11:50.000 And it was a total sucker punch.

01:11:52.000 He had no idea what was going on.

01:11:53.000 But look when Mayweather has issues.

01:11:55.000 Against a guy like Maydana.

01:11:57.000 Are you suggesting...

01:11:59.000 First fight. 0.98

01:11:59.000 Second fight, he boxed the shit out of him. 0.98

01:12:01.000 He did, but if Maydana... 0.95

01:12:03.000 If I was Conor's coach and that fight were to happen, I'm like, hey man, don't be pretty and sit on the outside and try and hit this guy.

01:12:10.000 We make this a dogfight.

01:12:11.000 You're the bigger guy.

01:12:12.000 You think Conor would actually give...

01:12:14.000 Floyd Mayweather, a boxing match?

01:12:16.000 Is that what I'm hearing?

01:12:17.000 No, that's not what anybody's saying.

01:12:19.000 I'm saying he'd be the biggest draw and be interesting.

01:12:19.000 No.

01:12:21.000 I'm saying that I don't think Floyd would just go out and try to knock him out in the first round.

01:12:24.000 Oh, you mean he'd just, yeah, he'd box him.

01:12:25.000 I think he would Canelo Alvarez him, but, you know, obviously Canelo's way more skillful in boxing.

01:12:30.000 I mean, Canelo is a world champion, one-punch knockout artist boxer.

01:12:30.000 Yeah.

01:12:35.000 I mean, that fucking Amir Khan knockout. 1.00

01:12:37.000 Jesus, Louisa. 0.99

01:12:39.000 You know what Floyd said? 0.99

01:12:40.000 That was a super fucking home run on the button. 0.99

01:12:43.000 Dude. 0.99

01:12:44.000 Floyd got hit, he said, when he fought Canelo, he got punched in the thigh by Canelo.

01:12:50.000 Had trouble walking for two days.

01:12:52.000 He didn't show it.

01:12:54.000 After the fight, he was like, dude, my thigh. 0.89

01:12:57.000 He punched me in the thigh so hard, I am having trouble walking.

01:13:00.000 That's why Floyd is never going to fight MMA. Because Conor would fucking break his legs. 0.99

01:13:05.000 Like, literally. 0.99

01:13:06.000 MMA would be more embarrassing than Conor doing just boxing.

01:13:10.000 He would get...

01:13:10.000 Way more embarrassing.

01:13:11.000 Way more embarrassing.

01:13:12.000 Because Conor's a big guy, Floyd would have to box smart.

01:13:16.000 I don't think Conor...

01:13:17.000 I think Conor would have...

01:13:19.000 It's just an unbelievably difficult time even coming close to hitting him.

01:13:24.000 If he was straight boxing, he's probably going to get embarrassed.

01:13:27.000 You're talking about, if not the greatest boxer of all time, and his defense is good.

01:13:31.000 It would be a great show.

01:13:32.000 You can't say good.

01:13:33.000 It's the best defense ever.

01:13:35.000 For sure.

01:13:36.000 Best defense ever.

01:13:36.000 Who's got better defense than Floyd?

01:13:37.000 And now you're taking a guy who, he's an elite striker in the UFC, but boxing's a different game, man.

01:13:44.000 You know, I would have loved to seen Canelo fight Floyd, like, in a couple of years, when Canelo's, like, 27, 28. You know, when he has the experience.

01:13:53.000 Because I think, like, if you look at, like, Sugary Leonard versus Roberto Duran, like, both guys were, like, really in their prime.

01:14:01.000 Experience in their prime.

01:14:02.000 World champions.

01:14:03.000 Great style.

01:14:03.000 The moment wasn't too big.

01:14:04.000 And sometimes, you know, I mean, sometimes...

01:14:06.000 Like your prime comes early, like Tyson.

01:14:08.000 And sometimes your prime comes later, like Bernard Hopkins.

01:14:12.000 But when a guy's in his prime, you know he's in his prime.

01:14:14.000 I think Canelo wasn't in his prime when he fought Floyd.

01:14:16.000 I think he's getting there.

01:14:18.000 If I'm Canelo's management, and as a fan, I won't see Canelo Triple G. And granted, they say Canelo's probably going to have to vacate in his belt if he doesn't fight Triple G. That's what they're saying.

01:14:27.000 At that weight.

01:14:28.000 Why does he want 155?

01:14:29.000 That's not middleweight.

01:14:31.000 Why are they saying he's making all these fights at 155 and they're calling him middleweight because it's over 154?

01:14:37.000 Yeah, they have a weird thing going on.

01:14:39.000 That's what's wrong with boxing.

01:14:40.000 But if I'm Canelo's camp, I'm not setting that fight up yet, man.

01:14:44.000 As a fan, I'm like, dear God, make that fight happen.

01:14:46.000 As a businessman, a manager, I'm like, Canelo, you ain't fighting Triple G right now.

01:14:50.000 We're going to do a couple more big paydays.

01:14:53.000 Also, you've got to remember, Triple G's not a draw.

01:14:55.000 We know him wearing the fight game.

01:14:57.000 He's not a draw at all.

01:14:58.000 His pay-per-view did, I think, $125,000, $125,000.

01:15:01.000 Brandon, listen.

01:15:01.000 Wow.

01:15:03.000 Big drama show.

01:15:04.000 Big drama show.

01:15:05.000 I give you drama show.

01:15:06.000 Serious business.

01:15:07.000 I've won the belt.

01:15:08.000 Serious business.

01:15:09.000 I love that guy.

01:15:10.000 He's awesome, man.

01:15:10.000 He's the best, but he's just not as far as being a pay-per-view drawing power.

01:15:15.000 He's not there yet. 0.99

01:15:16.000 So give Canelo 70-30 and knock him the fuck out. 0.98

01:15:19.000 He won't do it. 0.99

01:15:20.000 He won't do it.

01:15:21.000 You toss Canelo like Lemieux or someone else so he can just merc and keep building his name.

01:15:25.000 Well, he wants it to be 160 and Canelo wants it to be 155. Apparently that's a hold-up.

01:15:33.000 Triple G's a bigger guy.

01:15:35.000 If Triple G has to drop down five pounds, they think it'll be enough to weaken him and maybe Canelo can have a chance and they can slug it out in the trenches.

01:15:42.000 Why does he hit so hard?

01:15:43.000 If you look at the fight, the actual fight itself, when Amir Khan just fought Canelo, he did expose that speed and movement are still a problem.

01:15:54.000 He doesn't have the same speed or the same movement as Floyd, but his speed and movement were a bit of a problem.

01:15:54.000 Yes.

01:16:00.000 Gave him some real issues.

01:16:01.000 Gave him some real issues.

01:16:01.000 That 1-2 was landing all night.

01:16:03.000 Yes, especially in the first round.

01:16:04.000 The first round he lit him up with some straight right hands.

01:16:06.000 I was like, ooh, okay.

01:16:08.000 How's this going to play out?

01:16:09.000 But I think that there's no one else in that division that can do that.

01:16:12.000 Cotto couldn't do it to him.

01:16:14.000 Canelo outboxed Cotto.

01:16:15.000 I mean, and then Floyd was really the only guy to expose it, but Floyd's Floyd.

01:16:19.000 There's no other Floyds. 0.92

01:16:20.000 So who the fuck else is in the division? 0.96

01:16:22.000 I think Triple G, Canelo right now, it'd be a bad decision for Canelo. 0.85

01:16:27.000 Well, Terrence Crawford's 147. So talented.

01:16:30.000 147 and 154 are next door neighbors.

01:16:33.000 How weird is it?

01:16:33.000 They fight over like two and three pounds.

01:16:35.000 It's crazy. 1.00

01:16:36.000 Fucking make the weight. 1.00

01:16:37.000 Shut your mouth. 1.00

01:16:37.000 It's so different than MMA in that regard. 1.00

01:16:38.000 It's so weird. 0.98

01:16:39.000 MMA, you're dealing with, you know, from middleweight to light heavyweight, which guys jump back and forth, you're dealing with 20 fucking pounds. 0.98

01:16:46.000 I mean, that's madness. 0.94

01:16:47.000 You think there should be more weight classes? 1.00

01:16:49.000 Fuck yeah! 1.00

01:16:50.000 I've been saying this from the jump. 1.00

01:16:51.000 There should be a weight class every 10 pounds. 0.97

01:16:53.000 And they're like, well, if there's too many champions, it waters it down.

01:16:56.000 I completely disagree.

01:16:58.000 You're telling me some of these amazing fighters that you have that are superstars, like a Donald Cerrone, like a Diego Sanchez, like all these different guys that are just amazing guys that never won a title, that are huge fan favorites, right?

01:17:10.000 If you look at all these different guys, Uriah Faber is another one.

01:17:13.000 You're telling me those guys couldn't have been champions and you wouldn't have had even more champions and an even crazier thing if there was a weight class every 10 pounds?

01:17:22.000 And a better product.

01:17:22.000 Because you're getting better performances.

01:17:25.000 Because Donald's not destroying his body to make 55. You're not having these monsters make these weight classes.

01:17:30.000 And they're actual world champions.

01:17:32.000 Think about the sponsorships, celebrities.

01:17:34.000 There's not enough weight classes.

01:17:35.000 There's not enough weight classes.

01:17:36.000 206 or 265, how dare you?

01:17:39.000 That's crazy.

01:17:40.000 God damn it. 0.99

01:17:43.000 But what's interesting is the best guys seem to flatten out around 240. So my thought is... 0.99

01:17:49.000 Let's make a 240. Let's make that heavyweight and then 240 to 265. The world champions, the better. 0.89

01:17:56.000 Or all the way up.

01:17:59.000 The only time you can't is like...

01:18:01.000 A little bit of a problem is with Cyborg, right?

01:18:05.000 Because she goes, I'll fight anyone at 140, but at 140, I heard from my stories, it was a beast for her to get to. 0.99

01:18:12.000 I think she's the 145-pound Invicta champion. 1.00

01:18:15.000 They have a 135 in the UFC. Make a 145!

01:18:18.000 I think you can do 140!

01:18:20.000 Why 40?

01:18:21.000 Why 5 pounds?

01:18:21.000 She can make 40!

01:18:22.000 But why do it?

01:18:23.000 She's a 145-pound champ. 1.00

01:18:23.000 Why make her make it? 1.00

01:18:25.000 I know, but there's not a lot of...

01:18:26.000 All the superstars at 135 can make 140. To make them put on 10 pounds, build it, they will come.

01:18:34.000 That's how it always is.

01:18:35.000 I'm saying right now, Mr. Rogan.

01:18:37.000 We're trying right now.

01:18:38.000 We can understand.

01:18:38.000 She's the Invicta champion, so she's fighting people in Invicta.

01:18:41.000 Hey, hey, hey.

01:18:42.000 Yeah, look, she's better than all of them anyway. 1.00

01:18:45.000 Doesn't matter.

01:18:46.000 But you shouldn't be forcing her to kill herself when 145 is already an established weight class.

01:18:50.000 Misha Tate was the 145 pound champion in Strikeforce.

01:18:53.000 It's an established weight class.

01:18:55.000 Misha said she would fight her, too.

01:18:56.000 It's an established weight class.

01:18:58.000 I think at 140, though.

01:18:59.000 Well, listen, Holly Holm's fought people in boxing as high as 152. But 145 is an established weight class.

01:19:05.000 Who the fuck could sign up to fight Cyborg? 0.79

01:19:07.000 How does Holly Holm do against Cyborg? 1.00

01:19:09.000 Holly Holm has the best chance because Cyborg is a ruthless marauder. 0.99

01:19:15.000 She's like a berserker, attacker, shoot-the-box style. 1.00

01:19:18.000 Not this last fight.

01:19:19.000 No, she wasn't.

01:19:20.000 This last fight.

01:19:20.000 More tactical.

01:19:22.000 And those hits, I was like, oh shit! 1.00

01:19:25.000 Leslie, run! 1.00

01:19:26.000 Yeah, that counter right hand's nasty. 0.99

01:19:28.000 And she kicks. 1.00

01:19:29.000 She kicks hard. 0.84

01:19:30.000 Knees hard.

01:19:31.000 Of course she's mad at the stoppage. 0.98

01:19:32.000 She's a beast. 1.00

01:19:33.000 She should be celebrating that stuff. 0.71

01:19:35.000 She should definitely thank the referee. 0.72

01:19:37.000 The referee saved her from herself. 1.00

01:19:39.000 But she's just so tough.

01:19:40.000 She's a fighter. 1.00

01:19:41.000 She's so tough.

01:19:42.000 She wanted to go out on our shield. 0.99

01:19:42.000 That's what you want. 0.99

01:19:44.000 But she was already gone.

01:19:45.000 She doesn't understand.

01:19:46.000 That ground and pound? 1.00

01:19:47.000 That shit is... 1.00

01:19:49.000 El Fedor days. 1.00

01:19:50.000 Nasty. 1.00

01:19:51.000 She was punching a bitch in the face. 1.00

01:19:52.000 She's so much more advanced than anybody else. 1.00

01:19:55.000 Crazy. 0.95

01:19:56.000 So much more advanced.

01:19:56.000 I think we've got to chalk it up to Perillo.

01:19:58.000 Well, she's different than Holly. 0.89

01:20:00.000 See, Holly is a counter-striker, and Holly also had a really brutal knockout in boxing against a larger woman. 1.00

01:20:08.000 I've watched it, and I was like, whoa.

01:20:08.000 It's nasty.

01:20:10.000 It's the kind of knockout that you never really fight That way again, because you realize the consequences now.

01:20:16.000 Someone gets brutally, brutally knocked out.

01:20:19.000 They're aware of that as a consequence, and I think she's become much more of a defensive-minded counter-striker, which was super effective against Ronda, obviously.

01:20:27.000 It's better, I think, for her.

01:20:29.000 Right, but it didn't look so good against Misha, because Misha was fighting super smart, and when Misha took her down...

01:20:35.000 Well, it's also because Misha doesn't rush after. 0.65

01:20:38.000 Misha's varying her rhythm, she's standing outside.

01:20:41.000 Misha fought amazing, but I also thought, for whatever reason, Holly didn't fight like herself.

01:20:46.000 She wasn't pulling the trigger.

01:20:47.000 She doesn't like the lead.

01:20:48.000 She doesn't like the lead, and she's worried about being taken down. 0.57

01:20:50.000 When she got taken down by Misha, we realized why she doesn't like the lead. 0.98

01:20:53.000 Misha took her down, beat the shit out of her on the ground, destroyed her in that second round. 0.98

01:20:53.000 Correct. 0.98

01:20:57.000 Was on top of her most of the round, just beating her ass. 1.00

01:21:00.000 And so we knew, look, if Misha gets her down, she's fucked. 1.00

01:21:03.000 So then she fights like a craftsman for the third and fourth round. 1.00

01:21:07.000 She just fights real smart, stays on the outside, edges those rounds, and then Misha's forced to go for broke in the fifth.

01:21:13.000 And Misha wound up taking her out and choking her out.

01:21:15.000 Great story, man.

01:21:16.000 But here's the thing.

01:21:18.000 Cyborgs... 0.68

01:21:19.000 Way better on the ground.

01:21:21.000 I mean, way better on the ground.

01:21:23.000 And stronger.

01:21:24.000 Way, way better on the ground than Holly. 0.71

01:21:26.000 Way, way better.

01:21:27.000 Way better.

01:21:28.000 Cyborg wins straight jiu-jitsu competitions. 0.99

01:21:31.000 She is fucking strong. 1.00

01:21:33.000 Twist your fucking face, though. 1.00

01:21:34.000 She suplexes bitches. 1.00

01:21:35.000 She's just made to fight rag-dolling bitches. 1.00

01:21:38.000 And if she gets on top of you, oh my god. 1.00

01:21:41.000 Her grounded pound? 0.99

01:21:42.000 I was like, what the fuck are we doing? 1.00

01:21:44.000 She looks like a panther. 1.00

01:21:45.000 Like, she looks like...

01:21:46.000 It's almost like she was put on the earth for one thing.

01:21:48.000 When she's in that cage, you're just like... 1.00

01:21:50.000 To me, no one's doing shit until you beat her. 1.00

01:21:52.000 Yeah, she's built herself into that. 1.00

01:21:55.000 It's taken so long for her to finally get her.

01:21:57.000 Now she's here, and everyone's like, God.

01:22:00.000 And even when she's here, man, they did it in Brazil, and they did it at 140. They made her suffer.

01:22:04.000 In my personal choice, I would have had the first ever 145-pound fight in the UFC, let a bunch of people sign up to be who wants to get in there and duke it out with Cyborg.

01:22:14.000 Ain't no one signing up for that, my man.

01:22:16.000 That's the problem.

01:22:17.000 But I think you've got Invicta girls that are agreeing to fight her. 1.00

01:22:19.000 So if you've got Invicta girls that are agreeing to fight her, you're telling me those girls wouldn't take a fight in the UFC? Of course they would. 1.00

01:22:23.000 I'm telling you no one would care.

01:22:24.000 Frank Edgar.

01:22:25.000 It doesn't matter.

01:22:26.000 It's the cyborg show.

01:22:27.000 Dude, it's the cyborg show.

01:22:28.000 Right now, dude.

01:22:29.000 This is Mike Tyson versus people that you don't know.

01:22:32.000 It's Tony Tubbs.

01:22:33.000 Mike Tyson versus Tony Tubbs.

01:22:35.000 She has a ways to go before she's Mike Tyson. 1.00

01:22:35.000 Easy. 1.00

01:22:37.000 She just got introduced to regular fans.

01:22:39.000 But I'm saying, when you went to see Mike Tyson versus Tony Tubbs, you didn't think Tony Tubbs was going to win.

01:22:43.000 I'm a Tony Tubbs fan.

01:22:44.000 You went to see the Mike Tyson show.

01:22:45.000 No, I was there to see Tony Tubbs' footwork.

01:22:49.000 I'm with you.

01:22:49.000 I'm just saying, if you're Misha's manager and they're like, hey, we need you to fight at 145 Cyborg.

01:22:55.000 I think Misha would take that fight in a heartbeat.

01:22:57.000 Misha would take it.

01:22:59.000 Everyone else is like, nope.

01:23:00.000 That ain't a good move.

01:23:01.000 Everyone else is like, nope.

01:23:02.000 And listen, you know, Cyborg, like, go back to the Gina Carano fight.

01:23:05.000 Cyborg had problems in that fight.

01:23:07.000 So people don't understand, Gina Carano had her mounted. 1.00

01:23:09.000 Gina Carano was a tough fucking girl. 1.00

01:23:12.000 They duked it out. 1.00

01:23:14.000 Gina literally was on top of her, had her mounted.

01:23:16.000 Cyborg wasn't the same Cyborg back then, but Cyborg was way more shredded back then.

01:23:21.000 She was like a bodybuilder, man. 1.00

01:23:24.000 She was terrifying.

01:23:25.000 Just the physical muscular, the muscularity and the power that she had. 0.84

01:23:30.000 There's a picture that I'll never forget, man.

01:23:32.000 If I have a list of all my iconic memories of photographs in MMA, there's one where Cyborg is grabbing...

01:23:42.000 The head of Gina Carano.

01:23:43.000 She's got her fingers out.

01:23:45.000 She's got an MMA glove on with nail polish on. 1.00

01:23:48.000 And she's about to punch her in the face. 1.00

01:23:50.000 And Gina's face is already fucked up. 1.00

01:23:52.000 And Cyborg's holding her head. 0.99

01:23:54.000 I'm not trying to see that picture.

01:23:55.000 There it is, right there.

01:23:56.000 Look at that.

01:23:56.000 God dog!

01:23:57.000 Look at that.

01:23:58.000 Come on, son.

01:23:59.000 That is an iconic photo. 1.00

01:23:59.000 Damn! 1.00

01:24:01.000 Look at the eyes. 1.00

01:24:02.000 The cold-blooded killer. 0.86

01:24:04.000 It looks like Cyborg's in the back going, shh! 1.00

01:24:06.000 Shut the fuck up! 1.00

01:24:08.000 Boom! 1.00

01:24:09.000 She's dropping a right hand on her fucking jaw right there, crushing her. 1.00

01:24:14.000 You feel that, bitch? 1.00

01:24:15.000 And this is, by the way, the cyborg that you're watching... 1.00

01:24:19.000 But look at the muscles on her fucking shoulder and her arm. 1.00

01:24:21.000 And the cyborg you're looking at today... 1.00

01:24:24.000 The cyborg you look at today would fuck this cyborg up. 0.99

01:24:26.000 For sure. 0.99

01:24:27.000 She's better now. 0.98

01:24:28.000 She's super fucking dedicated, man. 1.00

01:24:31.000 She's just doing the damn thing. 1.00

01:24:32.000 Ever seen some of the videos of her training at Phuket top team? 0.99

01:24:35.000 Nope. 0.99

01:24:36.000 Kicking bitches faces up. 1.00

01:24:37.000 She spends a lot of time in Thailand. 1.00

01:24:37.000 Good lord. 1.00

01:24:38.000 Yeah.

01:24:39.000 Running hills and training with men.

01:24:41.000 I saw her man, the old man, with this cyborg, Santos, fighting Bellator.

01:24:41.000 Dude.

01:24:51.000 This past weekend.

01:24:52.000 He fought.

01:24:52.000 Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah.

01:24:53.000 Well, he lost.

01:24:54.000 He committed to a knee bar.

01:24:55.000 It's weird.

01:24:56.000 A guy of his stature.

01:24:57.000 Because he won in the first fight with a knee bar.

01:24:59.000 Yeah, so this time he committed to it.

01:25:01.000 I'm like, for sure let go of that knee bar.

01:25:01.000 And he's getting hit.

01:25:03.000 For sure let go of that knee bar. 1.00

01:25:04.000 And it's too late.

01:25:05.000 There's a picture of her and him.

01:25:07.000 Her husband and her.

01:25:08.000 Oh, they have some photoshoots.

01:25:09.000 And just their backs.

01:25:09.000 Their backs.

01:25:10.000 And her back is every bit as wide. 0.99

01:25:12.000 No, they have one where I think it's just asses, and it's both of them just like... 0.95

01:25:16.000 There's that picture where you see them... 0.99

01:25:16.000 That's unfortunate. 0.99

01:25:18.000 Oh, no, it's awesome.

01:25:19.000 They should have some friends talk them out of those kind of photos. 1.00

01:25:22.000 It's like a Brazilian cologne out of some shit. 1.00

01:25:22.000 Oh, I disagree. 1.00

01:25:34.000 How about Matt Brown?

01:25:36.000 Could it have gone any worse?

01:25:38.000 I didn't see it. 1.00

01:25:38.000 My goddamn DVR fucked up somehow. 1.00

01:25:42.000 My kids put like Max and Ruby on or some shit. 1.00

01:25:45.000 They cancels. 0.97

01:25:46.000 You know how sometimes people try to have two things?

01:25:50.000 My wife will move up the kids' shows to the top of the order.

01:25:54.000 So I didn't even watch the fight. 0.99

01:25:56.000 So he gets fucked up by the fans. 0.99

01:25:58.000 And they kicked this fan out, by the way. 0.99

01:26:00.000 The fan punched him in the face because he was flipping everyone off at Wayne's.

01:26:03.000 And then his old coach, after the fight, he's in the hotel.

01:26:06.000 And they're smacking him in the head, man.

01:26:07.000 A couple guys smacked him in the head.

01:26:10.000 They took that dude out of the arena, though.

01:26:12.000 Yeah, but a couple guys smacked him in the head as he's running in before the guy punched him.

01:26:16.000 I know.

01:26:16.000 I'm saying they took one of the guys out and smacked him.

01:26:18.000 Oh, did they?

01:26:18.000 Right.

01:26:19.000 Well, they should have taken all of them. 1.00

01:26:20.000 I agree, stupid host. 1.00

01:26:21.000 Hey, security, step your fucking game up. 1.00

01:26:23.000 But it's just embarrassing. 0.99

01:26:25.000 Look at that. 1.00

01:26:25.000 Goddamn. 1.00

01:26:26.000 He rocked someone, though. 0.99

01:26:26.000 Boom. 0.99

01:26:26.000 Oh, shit. 0.99

01:26:27.000 Oh, yeah, dude. 1.00

01:26:28.000 He uncorked a bomb on someone's face. 0.80

01:26:30.000 That guy got Matt Browned in the face. 0.66

01:26:32.000 Yeah, he did.

01:26:32.000 But then Damien Maia said, welcome to my country.

01:26:34.000 Yeah. 1.00

01:26:35.000 About to choke your ass out. 1.00

01:26:36.000 I didn't see the fight, man. 1.00

01:26:36.000 I love Matt Brown, too. 1.00

01:26:38.000 Can we find the fight, Jamie?

01:26:39.000 See if we can find the fight.

01:26:41.000 So we'll do commentary.

01:26:42.000 But how about afterwards he's in the hotel and his old coach sucker punched him in the back of the head.

01:26:48.000 And then got his old coach?

01:26:48.000 That's what I heard.

01:26:50.000 Matt Brown's coach?

01:26:51.000 Matt Brown's old grappling coach sucker punched him in the back of the head and then he runs off.

01:26:56.000 Oh no, you ain't running because Matt Brown's coaches are around.

01:26:58.000 Leicester Bowling and his other Jiu-Jitsu coach, they catch this dude.

01:27:01.000 Beat the brakes off of him.

01:27:03.000 Then he got arrested.

01:27:03.000 Is that right?

01:27:04.000 Reed Harris was just like, hey!

01:27:06.000 Just went all aggro.

01:27:07.000 Caught this dude.

01:27:08.000 Why'd they punch him in the back of the head?

01:27:10.000 Because they have a history. 1.00

01:27:12.000 What an asshole. 1.00

01:27:13.000 Yeah, but can you... 1.00

01:27:14.000 I've got to pee on my big huge dick. 1.00

01:27:15.000 I'll be right back. 1.00

01:27:16.000 Let us know about it.

01:27:18.000 Think about it.

01:27:22.000 He's all trimmed up, huh?

01:27:24.000 How much has he lost?

01:27:25.000 I swear to God, he's got to be...

01:27:27.000 He usually walked around at 255 in every bit.

01:27:30.000 He's probably 240 right now.

01:27:32.000 Has it made you think about changing your diet?

01:27:34.000 No. 1.00

01:27:35.000 You like eating bread and shit? 1.00

01:27:36.000 I do well with carbs, like rice. 1.00

01:27:36.000 Yeah. 1.00

01:27:38.000 I eat pretty clean.

01:27:39.000 Rice, potatoes.

01:27:40.000 I don't mind it.

01:27:41.000 I don't think I'm the body type.

01:27:43.000 I think I'd get even skinnier, dude.

01:27:45.000 For me, I need all the carbs I can get.

01:27:48.000 I sleep well on carbs.

01:27:50.000 Have you ever tried not having them?

01:27:52.000 No.

01:27:53.000 So how do you know?

01:27:54.000 I mean, I have though, actually, and that's not true.

01:27:54.000 No.

01:27:56.000 I stay very far away from sugar.

01:27:58.000 Yeah, but that's, I think, the most important thing.

01:28:00.000 Yeah.

01:28:01.000 I don't eat sugar.

01:28:02.000 That's what I was telling people when the first attempt at doing something, I tried gluten, no gluten.

01:28:07.000 But I think the real issue is I wasn't eating bread.

01:28:10.000 So if I'm not eating bread, I'm not getting sugar.

01:28:12.000 Exactly.

01:28:13.000 And when I, and I don't eat a lot of bread because I'm aware of, because I monitor my body.

01:28:18.000 Like, so if I eat two slices, even of really good bread, I notice that my energy kind of, it's not the same as if I eat slow cooked oatmeal, I feel really good.

01:28:28.000 You know?

01:28:28.000 Right.

01:28:29.000 Yeah.

01:28:29.000 There's definitely some spikes going on, some insulin spikes going on when you eat sugar and you eat bread and we're just used to them.

01:28:36.000 Remember, I don't eat a lot either.

01:28:37.000 That's the other thing.

01:28:38.000 I'm not a big eater to begin with.

01:28:39.000 Oh, we got the fight.

01:28:40.000 Here it is.

01:28:40.000 Damian Mayan, Matt Brown.

01:28:43.000 This is round three?

01:28:44.000 Oh, okay.

01:28:45.000 We don't know what was going on before that, but we assume it was good.

01:28:48.000 They don't look too...

01:28:49.000 Oh, he's sprawling.

01:28:51.000 He's trying to keep it standing up.

01:28:53.000 Damian Mayan's doing a good job of standing on the outside of...

01:28:56.000 But he's making it real obvious that he wants to take him down.

01:28:59.000 He shoots in.

01:29:01.000 He has to move away from the kick.

01:29:02.000 He's so big at 170. Maya's a beast at 170. I've never seen him in person. 1.00

01:29:06.000 I mean, he fought for the title at 185. He's a big guy.

01:29:09.000 Ooh, good jab there by Maya, and he tries to take down again. 0.91

01:29:12.000 And Matt Brown punches him, and he...

01:29:14.000 And Matt Brown gets on top. 1.00

01:29:15.000 This is where he fucked up, man. 0.99

01:29:16.000 You can't do that, dude. 1.00

01:29:16.000 Yeah. 1.00

01:29:17.000 That's a trap.

01:29:18.000 Can't let Damien trap you.

01:29:20.000 We thought he hurt him.

01:29:21.000 You know, he didn't really hurt him.

01:29:23.000 Damian Maia did exactly...

01:29:24.000 Brendan Schaub just returns.

01:29:25.000 He did exactly what we were saying about Fabrizio Verdun with Fedor.

01:29:28.000 He pretends he gets hurt, and Matt Brown moved in to try to finish him, and then Maia got a hold of him. 0.99

01:29:33.000 Are you talking about the ultimate honey dick? 1.00

01:29:34.000 And Maia drags him to the ground. 0.99

01:29:36.000 This is how confident he is in his jiu-jitsu.

01:29:37.000 He lets him mount him. 1.00

01:29:38.000 Fuck. 1.00

01:29:39.000 I mean, he drags him to the ground just to do this, just to sweep him, and now Matt Brown's fucked. 1.00

01:29:44.000 That sequence, that whole sequence was so advanced, what he just did there. 0.96

01:29:49.000 He let Matt Brown drag him down, and Matt Brown, his instincts as a destroyer were to immediately get on top of him.

01:29:55.000 Because he's not seeing that in training.

01:29:57.000 No, especially not allowing him to potentially knock him out with some ground and pound.

01:29:57.000 No one's doing that in training.

01:30:03.000 But Damien Maia's jiu-jitsu is so solid and so slick that whatever shot attempts he gets off, mostly it deflected, and then he eventually sweeps him, and now he's mounting him up against a cage.

01:30:13.000 And Matt Brown right now is in quicksand.

01:30:15.000 When you have Damian Maia on top of you and your legs are pinned together like that, that's terrifying.

01:30:20.000 Because what he's done here is he's isolated his legs with a triangle.

01:30:24.000 So by having those legs extended like that, he has no power from his hips.

01:30:28.000 He can't throw any punches, he can't get his feet back under him, and he can't get those legs back.

01:30:31.000 So he's got to commit with his hands. 0.90

01:30:33.000 So he's got to push down with his hands, and while he's pushing down with his hands, Maia can punch him in the face. 0.96

01:30:38.000 And so finally he gets his half guard back up, but whatever, good luck with that.

01:30:43.000 He'll get these butterflies, and Maya will just sit on your legs, wear them out, put pressure on you, and then when you stand up, he'll just get to an even better position. 0.92

01:30:51.000 He does this for all three rounds, by the way.

01:30:53.000 Well, this is what he does, man.

01:30:54.000 He did it to Rick Story.

01:30:55.000 Rick Story is a gorilla.

01:30:58.000 He's a gorilla wrestler who walks around at 200, cuts down to 170, and Damian Maya ragdolled him, man. 0.90

01:31:05.000 See, that wasn't that impressive.

01:31:06.000 He did it to Gunnar Nelson.

01:31:07.000 Mm-hmm.

01:31:08.000 And then Neil Magny was like, oh, you're on a win streak?

01:31:08.000 Yeah.

01:31:10.000 That's cool.

01:31:10.000 Check this out.

01:31:11.000 Yeah.

01:31:12.000 He just shuts you down on the ground.

01:31:14.000 How about the fact that Jake Shields beat Damian Maia?

01:31:16.000 Sure did.

01:31:17.000 In a grappling contest.

01:31:18.000 It's crazy.

01:31:18.000 Jake Shields is legit one of the best in the world as a grappler.

01:31:22.000 One of the best in the world.

01:31:23.000 Jake beat him in the UFC. Yeah.

01:31:25.000 I mean, but that's why. 0.99

01:31:27.000 Because if they were grappling, Jake would give them a hell of a fucking run. 1.00

01:31:30.000 Jake is a beast, dude. 0.99

01:31:32.000 His grappling is absolutely world-class.

01:31:34.000 His problem in the UFC has always been his speed and his striking.

01:31:38.000 He's just not a dangerous striker in the way a lot of guys are.

01:31:41.000 It's not even that.

01:31:41.000 He's a boring fighter.

01:31:44.000 Not to me, to the brass.

01:31:46.000 So you look at who he's beat.

01:31:48.000 He's beat the very best.

01:31:49.000 He's beat, I think, all top five guys.

01:31:51.000 He's beat Robbie Lawler.

01:31:53.000 He's beat all these guys.

01:31:55.000 Damian Maia, Woodley.

01:31:56.000 Hey, you would know this answer.

01:31:57.000 Look, he's trying to protect himself, but it's just futile.

01:32:00.000 It's just when Maya gets that body triangle around on you, he's just constantly manipulating you. 0.90

01:32:05.000 He doesn't try in one direction only.

01:32:08.000 He's setting up escape doors.

01:32:10.000 So if you try to move through one of those escape doors, a new trap is waiting for you.

01:32:14.000 And those traps you're not going to see because that's from years and years and years.

01:32:18.000 So your basic movements that usually get you out aren't going to happen.

01:32:22.000 Ouch! 1.00

01:32:22.000 Right in the face over and over. 1.00

01:32:23.000 Yeah, don't say ouch though, huh?

01:32:25.000 Hey, let me ask you this.

01:32:26.000 You would know this.

01:32:27.000 Why, when they showed the top contenders in the 185-pound weight class, was Yoel Romero not there?

01:32:32.000 Because he just got cleared to fight again.

01:32:34.000 Well, he didn't get cleared to fight again.

01:32:35.000 No.

01:32:36.000 They cleared the possibility that he might get a lesser sentence because they found the supplement that he took.

01:32:42.000 But you're not supposed to take supplements. 0.99

01:32:44.000 When you just buy some shit at GNC, he's just beating on him and manipulating him with that body triangle, man. 1.00

01:32:51.000 Crazy. 1.00

01:32:52.000 I thought he was cleared to fight in two months or something.

01:32:55.000 No, I don't think they've made a clear decision yet, but they've opened the door for him.

01:32:59.000 Look at that.

01:32:59.000 Oh my god, he tried to punch back behind him.

01:33:02.000 I'm surprised he did that.

01:33:04.000 Well, he's done now.

01:33:05.000 Once it's under the neck, he's done.

01:33:07.000 This one's over.

01:33:08.000 There's not much you can do.

01:33:10.000 How badass is Matt Brown, though?

01:33:12.000 Oh my god.

01:33:12.000 I mean, he's badass, but I'm just so impressed with Damian Maia.

01:33:15.000 I mean, how do you not be impressed with Damian Maia?

01:33:18.000 You think title shot next for Maia? 0.99

01:33:18.000 Fuck yeah. 0.99

01:33:19.000 Has to be, right? 1.00

01:33:20.000 Fuck yeah. 1.00

01:33:20.000 And by the way... 1.00

01:33:22.000 He's ran through all these young guys. 1.00

01:33:23.000 If he gets those guys down, they're all fucked. 1.00

01:33:26.000 They're all fucked. 1.00

01:33:27.000 Damian Maia, if you don't knock him out, and at 170, that ain't no picnic, because he can strike. 1.00

01:33:31.000 He can hit hard, man.

01:33:34.000 Well, if he decides to strike with Robbie Lawler, I'm just kidding.

01:33:36.000 I don't think he will.

01:33:37.000 I mean, I don't think he will.

01:33:38.000 He's gonna try to turn him into one of these.

01:33:40.000 I agree.

01:33:41.000 Dude, he's the master.

01:33:42.000 When it comes to jiu-jitsu, he is the UFC master.

01:33:46.000 Because he is, out of all the guys, he's the one guy that's fought the most intelligently with jiu-jitsu.

01:33:51.000 Because look at Fabrizio.

01:33:53.000 His striking got better, he got better with striking, but his striking ultimately cost him.

01:33:57.000 Yes.

01:33:57.000 Whereas, Maia has just never gone off track.

01:34:01.000 This is new, though.

01:34:02.000 This new winning streak.

01:34:03.000 Because remember before, it's like...

01:34:05.000 170. Yeah, 170. Because he went down to 170. Yeah, at 185, he was trying to strike with dudes.

01:34:09.000 He was too small.

01:34:09.000 He was striking too much.

01:34:10.000 He was too small.

01:34:10.000 He wasn't strong enough to overwhelm them at 170. Or at 185. But at 170, he is.

01:34:16.000 He's going to be tough to beat, man. 1.00

01:34:17.000 Fuck yeah, he is. 1.00

01:34:18.000 Yeah, I want to see... 1.00

01:34:19.000 I'm excited to see Jacare fight Luke...

01:34:22.000 Yes.

01:34:22.000 Speaking of jujitsu.

01:34:24.000 Well, Luke's got to get past Weidman.

01:34:25.000 You know, the rematch with Weidman is going to be crazy.

01:34:28.000 It's going to be interesting.

01:34:29.000 Look, Weidman made a big mistake in that fight.

01:34:32.000 Before that big mistake, it was a very close fight.

01:34:36.000 It was like, who knows what was going on.

01:34:38.000 And now Weidman says he had a broken foot, but Luke said he had a bad staph infection.

01:34:42.000 You know more than anybody.

01:34:44.000 When you go into fights, most of the time, you're not 100%.

01:34:46.000 You're not 100%, and with Weidman, from what I hear from his camp and from him, it was the worst camp of his life.

01:34:52.000 Like, he knew he needed to change things, but he thought he was so talented, he's a real champ, he's fine.

01:34:57.000 He doesn't need to do anything.

01:34:58.000 Why was it the worst camp?

01:35:00.000 I guess he had injuries and certain things.

01:35:02.000 He should have been flying people in. 1.00

01:35:04.000 He just didn't.

01:35:06.000 He should have been going somewhere else, working with Mark Henry more and doing other stuff.

01:35:10.000 He was just like, I'm good, man.

01:35:11.000 I'm champ.

01:35:11.000 He kind of got comfortable.

01:35:13.000 It ended up costing him.

01:35:15.000 This is no...

01:35:17.000 This is no gimme fight for either guy.

01:35:20.000 For either guy.

01:35:20.000 This is a war.

01:35:22.000 This is a war.

01:35:23.000 It's a war.

01:35:23.000 You know, I mean, Rockhold thinks he's gonna run through him this time because he thinks he doesn't have a staph infection.

01:35:27.000 And, you know, the staph infection was physically, like, really bad. 0.90

01:35:30.000 And he thinks he also is riding on the confidence of having beaten him, having beaten the living fuck out of Lyoto Machida. 0.99

01:35:36.000 His top game is some of the nastiest shit I've ever seen in my life. 1.00

01:35:40.000 Strong! 1.00

01:35:40.000 So good. 1.00

01:35:41.000 Big dude. 0.99

01:35:41.000 So what happens, he's a big dude, but he's also really talented, really smart, works hard, and he trains with two fucking gorillas. 0.99

01:35:49.000 Cain Velasquez and Daniel Cormier. 0.99

01:35:51.000 So he's going to war with gorillas. 0.97

01:35:53.000 And then Habib.

01:35:54.000 And Habib, I think, you know, training with a guy that's as high-level as Habib, you mirror some of his movements, you understand what he's doing, and then Habib's dad down there helping guys out there.

01:36:05.000 Was his dad a coach?

01:36:06.000 Oh, his dad coached Habib.

01:36:08.000 You know, I mean, his dad's always around Habib.

01:36:10.000 And his dad coached a few other guys that have fought in the UFC as well.

01:36:14.000 But you're also getting from Habib and, you know, DC and Kane, you're also picking up their training tendencies and the blueprint of these elite of the elite.

01:36:24.000 And the three of them and the four of them are coming together.

01:36:27.000 And Bob Cook, too, man.

01:36:28.000 Bob Cook's a wizard.

01:36:29.000 Javier... 0.88

01:36:31.000 Mendez is a wizard.

01:36:32.000 You got great talent as far as coaching.

01:36:35.000 They all have fights coming up.

01:36:36.000 They're all together.

01:36:37.000 He's also about as big as you can get for an 85-er. 1.00

01:36:40.000 He walked around at 216. That's a big guy.

01:36:44.000 That's a lot of weight to lose.

01:36:45.000 He's slim right now.

01:36:46.000 He's in shape right now.

01:36:47.000 I just saw him this weekend.

01:36:48.000 He's slim.

01:36:48.000 Well, he's fighting in a couple of weeks.

01:36:50.000 He was fighting two weeks before his fight.

01:36:53.000 He was 215 pounds.

01:36:54.000 It's out here in LA, June 4th.

01:36:56.000 That's right.

01:36:57.000 It's June 4th, right?

01:36:57.000 June 3rd and 4th?

01:36:59.000 Yeah.

01:36:59.000 That weekend?

01:37:00.000 Yeah.

01:37:00.000 That's a big, big fight in the middleweight division.

01:37:03.000 It's not getting enough attention, man.

01:37:05.000 It's interesting who becomes huge and famous and who does not become huge and famous.

01:37:10.000 It's really interesting.

01:37:10.000 But I haven't seen much publicity on this fight either.

01:37:13.000 I haven't?

01:37:14.000 Zero.

01:37:14.000 No, I mean, I'm sure they're going to ramp it up when it comes close to pay-per-view time.

01:37:19.000 But as far as the history of the middleweight division, I mean, Anderson was the GOAT, right?

01:37:23.000 He's the greatest of all time.

01:37:25.000 Anderson loses to this kid named Weidman by knockout.

01:37:28.000 Weidman should become a star.

01:37:30.000 Doesn't work like that.

01:37:31.000 I mean, in my eyes, he's a star.

01:37:33.000 I don't understand. 0.97

01:37:34.000 That sounds so gay. 0.96

01:37:36.000 In my eyes, he's a star. 0.95

01:37:39.000 I mean, I don't understand.

01:37:40.000 As a fan of MMA, I immediately became a gigantic Chris Weidman fan.

01:37:44.000 I was already a Chris Weidman fan. 1.00

01:37:46.000 Here's the scary shit on that fucking card. 1.00

01:37:50.000 Hector Lombard versus Dan Henderson. 1.00

01:37:52.000 Jesus Christ.

01:37:54.000 Do not blink.

01:37:56.000 Yeah.

01:37:57.000 Don't blink.

01:37:58.000 And don't count that old man out.

01:38:00.000 You can never count Danny Henderson out.

01:38:03.000 You can't count that guy out.

01:38:04.000 If he comes to the octagon with a scarf on, I'm counting him out.

01:38:07.000 See ya.

01:38:09.000 See ya.

01:38:10.000 Clay Guida's fighting again.

01:38:12.000 Cole Miller fighting BJ Penn.

01:38:15.000 Whoa.

01:38:15.000 And here's one everyone's sleeping on.

01:38:18.000 Max Holloway.

01:38:20.000 Get on that.

01:38:21.000 Fighting Ricardo Lamas.

01:38:22.000 Click on that.

01:38:24.000 Everybody's sleeping on that.

01:38:25.000 They are sleeping on that.

01:38:26.000 Bro, Brian Ortega versus Clay Guida is a fun one, too.

01:38:29.000 Because Guida's going to try to take him down. 1.00

01:38:31.000 That's good luck with all that.

01:38:32.000 Ortega's transition, his guard is, I think, the best in that division at 145. I think it's the best in the UFC. Nobody fucking throws up triangles the way Brian Ortega does.

01:38:43.000 That guy is so scary off his back. 0.99

01:38:45.000 You gotta train with that guy, Joe.

01:38:47.000 I'm sure.

01:38:47.000 It's like, what the...

01:38:49.000 Just...

01:38:49.000 Oh, and all he does is let people...

01:38:52.000 The best in the world star in his guard.

01:38:53.000 He just trains from there all the time.

01:38:55.000 I can only imagine.

01:38:56.000 And it's so fast.

01:38:57.000 Everything's so fast and explosive.

01:38:59.000 He's athletic.

01:38:59.000 I completely believe it.

01:39:01.000 He got popped.

01:39:03.000 He did.

01:39:04.000 He got popped for something.

01:39:05.000 All those Black House boys did for a while there. 1.00

01:39:08.000 Yeah, he got popped for something.

01:39:09.000 He's back now, baby!

01:39:10.000 But let me tell you something.

01:39:11.000 His last performance...

01:39:12.000 Click on him real quick.

01:39:14.000 Let me see what his last fight was.

01:39:16.000 I forget what his...

01:39:18.000 Triangle City.

01:39:19.000 Yeah, well that's his TC. Yeah, but he won by Triangle's last fight.

01:39:23.000 Yeah, he did.

01:39:23.000 But that's his nickname, Triangle City.

01:39:26.000 Diego Brando.

01:39:28.000 That's when Brando got cut.

01:39:30.000 Yeah.

01:39:31.000 I bet you're thinking of the Tarveris fight where he's back and forth.

01:39:34.000 Remember that?

01:39:35.000 He KO'd him in the third round. 1.00

01:39:35.000 That was a fucking fight. 1.00

01:39:37.000 Fight of the night. 1.00

01:39:38.000 And then it was, yeah, it was the Diego Brandao fight.

01:39:41.000 That's what it is.

01:39:42.000 And Brandao said, you know what, man?

01:39:44.000 I'm going to go to a strip club with a gun and we'll see how this works out. 0.98

01:39:47.000 And then the UFC said, hey, man, you're not Jon Jones. 0.83

01:39:49.000 We're going to have to let you go.

01:39:51.000 Yeah.

01:39:52.000 Plus, you can't go to a strip club with a gun.

01:39:54.000 That's a bad idea.

01:39:55.000 Yeah, that's a bad idea.

01:39:57.000 That's impulse control.

01:39:58.000 Now I'm remembering the fight.

01:40:00.000 It was super, super impressive jujitsu.

01:40:02.000 That Clay Guido Ortega one, that's fun.

01:40:04.000 When they told me he got that matchup, I said, this is the perfect fight for you.

01:40:07.000 Because the big name, it's a great style matchup for you, and everyone loves Clay, and it'll put you more on the map.

01:40:12.000 Yeah.

01:40:13.000 Clay, where's he at now?

01:40:14.000 Is he still training at Jackson's?

01:40:16.000 Or Jackson's Muscle Farm. 0.99

01:40:18.000 He's in his RV and shit, driving around nonstop. 0.99

01:40:20.000 It's been a while since he's had a good win. 1.00

01:40:22.000 I agree.

01:40:22.000 You've got to wonder how much longer he's going to be doing this.

01:40:25.000 I agree, man.

01:40:25.000 So this could be a make-or-break fight for him.

01:40:27.000 But if he wins, who knows?

01:40:29.000 He gets a resurgence.

01:40:30.000 Dude, Cruz favor three...

01:40:34.000 I'm just not excited for it.

01:40:35.000 I don't know why.

01:40:37.000 Are you out of your mind?

01:40:37.000 Isn't that weird?

01:40:38.000 Can you get me excited for it maybe?

01:40:40.000 I love this fight.

01:40:41.000 I love this fight because first of all, I think Uriah Faber is as close as you can get to being a world champion.

01:40:50.000 He's on the edge like everybody he fights.

01:40:54.000 Like, if he loses to, like, a world champion, it's like a whisper-thin decision.

01:40:59.000 It's close.

01:41:00.000 Or the one fight that he had with Hennenborough where he got cracked.

01:41:03.000 Yeah.

01:41:04.000 And that was a weird stoppage, man.

01:41:05.000 It's like, he definitely got cracked. 1.00

01:41:07.000 And if Hennenborough cracks you, you've got fucking problems. 0.99

01:41:09.000 But I thought the stoppage was a little weird. 0.99

01:41:11.000 But...

01:41:13.000 Anybody can get cracked like that.

01:41:14.000 Anybody can lose like that.

01:41:15.000 That's just a part of this game. 0.86

01:41:16.000 But I think, like, if you look at talent level and skill level, I go back to, like, the Michael McDonald fight when he fucking just blitzkrieged him and smashed him and choked him.

01:41:24.000 We haven't really heard from Michael McDonald since then. 0.77

01:41:24.000 Just came back recently. 0.77

01:41:25.000 Came back recently and won.

01:41:27.000 He did look good.

01:41:27.000 Looked fantastic.

01:41:28.000 But that fight was kind of like, you know what?

01:41:28.000 Yeah.

01:41:30.000 Yeah.

01:41:31.000 I'm gonna take a little break.

01:41:31.000 But when Uriah beat him, it really cemented in my head.

01:41:35.000 I was like, look, you gotta never sleep on this kid, dude.

01:41:38.000 He's a vet.

01:41:39.000 He's one of the biggest straws, too.

01:41:39.000 You can't, man.

01:41:41.000 He's super competitive.

01:41:42.000 You know what I want?

01:41:43.000 And I think he's better.

01:41:44.000 I think he keeps getting better.

01:41:46.000 I don't think he's a guy that's in a static state.

01:41:48.000 No.

01:41:49.000 I don't think he's like a veteran that's kind of like, you know, just putting in the work and phoning it in.

01:41:53.000 I don't think so.

01:41:54.000 Just gets in shape, brings his normal tools.

01:41:56.000 I don't think so.

01:41:56.000 You mean he's always changing all his...

01:41:58.000 Yes, I think he just keeps getting better.

01:41:59.000 You know what I want, Joe?

01:42:00.000 I think he comes into this fight guns blazing.

01:42:02.000 You know what I want? 0.99

01:42:03.000 I want the fucking winner of this fights Mighty Mouse. 1.00

01:42:03.000 What? 1.00

01:42:07.000 Mighty Mouse, beg for it, man. 0.85

01:42:09.000 Beg for it.

01:42:10.000 For the love of God.

01:42:12.000 Can you imagine if Uriah Faber beats Cruz, and that's a big F, and then fights Mighty Mouse?

01:42:18.000 Good lord.

01:42:19.000 Mighty Mouse, do you hate money?

01:42:20.000 And fame.

01:42:21.000 Let's do it, dawg.

01:42:22.000 And Uriah Faber would, for the first time in his career, just dwarf somebody.

01:42:26.000 He'd be the bigger guy. 0.99

01:42:27.000 He'd be like Cyborg on these bitches. 1.00

01:42:28.000 How much shorter is Mighty Mouse than Uriah? 0.99

01:42:31.000 Quite a bit.

01:42:32.000 Quite a bit.

01:42:32.000 He's a small guy, but skill-wise, he makes up for it tremendously.

01:42:36.000 He's impossible to hit.

01:42:37.000 Impossible.

01:42:38.000 Remember, Dominic Cruz and Mighty Mouse have fought before.

01:42:41.000 That was at 135, and Dominic won a decision.

01:42:45.000 But Dominic has got his own style.

01:42:48.000 If you look at his movement and his patterns, good luck finding anybody to replicate that.

01:42:54.000 His footwork and his movement and his patterns are all designed to constantly keep you guessing.

01:43:00.000 You're constantly being overrun with information.

01:43:04.000 If a guy stands in front of you, the less data that's coming your way, the more that you have...

01:43:08.000 You can concentrate on what's at hand and focus on what you're trying to do.

01:43:11.000 Smartest guy in the sport, I think.

01:43:13.000 And Dominic never gives you that.

01:43:14.000 He doesn't give you that.

01:43:15.000 There's never a time where he's standing in front of you just Muay Thai-ing you.

01:43:19.000 Yeah, you and Chael were talking to him and you were just blown away by him.

01:43:23.000 And we were training with him.

01:43:24.000 And he was training me and Chael like we're two white belts.

01:43:26.000 Like, Jesus Christ, man.

01:43:27.000 He's a wizard.

01:43:28.000 He's a wizard.

01:43:29.000 Dude, you're sleeping on Poirier.

01:43:31.000 Poirier in green.

01:43:32.000 No, I'm not.

01:43:32.000 I'm not sleeping on that at all.

01:43:34.000 That's a fucking fight, son. 1.00

01:43:34.000 Green's hard to hang. 1.00

01:43:35.000 Bobby Green hasn't been in a big fight in a while, too.

01:43:39.000 I'm psyched to see him back.

01:43:41.000 Bobby Green's one of them. 1.00

01:43:43.000 He always does a lot of shit talking. 0.99

01:43:44.000 But Bobby Green, when he's at his best, is one of the best at 155. So the diamond, too, man, at 55, now that he's there. 0.99

01:43:50.000 Because he fell off just a tad, and then he's at 55 now.

01:43:53.000 Well, Conor knocked him out. 0.99

01:43:54.000 He got knocked out in the first round by Connor, and he struggled too hard to make that fucking weight. 0.99

01:44:00.000 Yeah, big dude. 0.99

01:44:01.000 Those were during the IV days, too, by the way.

01:44:03.000 That's right.

01:44:05.000 It's really interesting to see the difference in a lot of these guys' bodies, now that there's so much testing.

01:44:09.000 It really is.

01:44:13.000 Some of them.

01:44:14.000 Yeah, some of them, for sure.

01:44:15.000 It's just that, like, what I would always think is if you wrestled and you did jiu-jitsu and you boxed and you kicked, you'd come out looking very, very muscular.

01:44:23.000 When you look at guys back, you know, five years ago and you look at guys now, there is a difference.

01:44:30.000 Like, if anything, they get kind of skinnier.

01:44:32.000 They look smoother.

01:44:34.000 Here's a big one.

01:44:35.000 EPO. If you can't use EPO, you've got to lose body mass.

01:44:38.000 You just have to.

01:44:39.000 Is that what it is?

01:44:39.000 Yeah, for sure.

01:44:40.000 It's a big part of...

01:44:42.000 Endurance.

01:44:43.000 Oxygen to the muscles.

01:44:43.000 That's what that melodium, whatever that stuff was, that boxer got caught from.

01:44:47.000 It mirrors that effect.

01:44:48.000 Those Russians are balls deep in it, I guess. 1.00

01:44:50.000 How about the Sochi?

01:44:51.000 Oh, too.

01:44:52.000 That's what the guy who fought...

01:44:53.000 Bagatinov.

01:44:54.000 Yeah, Bagatinov.

01:44:55.000 He's 125 pounds.

01:44:56.000 Did you read about the Sochi Olympics?

01:44:58.000 What?

01:44:58.000 And how...

01:44:59.000 They've uncovered that they don't know how they got into those bottles that they make in Switzerland.

01:45:06.000 They're like tamper for proof.

01:45:07.000 But however they did it, they're drawing this whole thing where they think 100 athletes in the Olympics were cheating on the Russian side.

01:45:28.000 Oh, he's a snitch.

01:45:34.000 We're basically involved in getting clean samples to WADA, etc.

01:45:41.000 Why is he snitching?

01:45:42.000 And it's basically out of a...

01:45:43.000 Why is he doing this?

01:45:44.000 Because his two colleagues were killed because they knew things.

01:45:49.000 So he went, oh, I'm next. 0.99

01:45:50.000 So just move to LA and shut your mouth. 0.99

01:45:52.000 That's what he did. 0.99

01:45:52.000 No, you can't shut your mouth. 0.99

01:45:53.000 Because Russians will get you. 1.00

01:45:54.000 You can't shut your mouth.

01:45:55.000 If he shuts his mouth, they'll still get him.

01:45:57.000 Yeah, and he had to prove that his life was in danger.

01:46:00.000 Yeah, you don't think they'd get you if you shut your mouth and you moved to LA? Oh, you're at home base.

01:46:05.000 You touched base.

01:46:06.000 They killed that guy in DC. This isn't the movies, is it?

01:46:08.000 Russian intelligence can find you.

01:46:10.000 Who'd they kill in DC? This guy.

01:46:12.000 He was found dead with blunt force trauma to the head.

01:46:15.000 I wonder how that happened.

01:46:16.000 Yeah, but here's the thing.

01:46:17.000 The autopsy, they didn't do an autopsy for a long time.

01:46:21.000 And initially, the cause of death was ruled as a heart attack.

01:46:24.000 And then they found blunt force trauma on his head.

01:46:27.000 How do you miss that?

01:46:28.000 Yeah, fine.

01:46:29.000 Because it's a spooky story.

01:46:31.000 Ex-aide to Putin died of blunt force trauma at DC Hotel, medical examiner says.

01:46:37.000 But look when they found him, and look when they actually made the autopsy claim.

01:46:42.000 I think it was quite a bit of time.

01:46:45.000 Look at him.

01:46:46.000 Died from blunt force trauma. 1.00

01:46:47.000 He got kettlebelled in the fucking head. 1.00

01:46:49.000 That's what they did. 1.00

01:46:52.000 Some Russian fucking kettlebells. 1.00

01:46:54.000 They tied him up and they just did fucking swings right at his head. 1.00

01:46:58.000 Dude, can you imagine that? 1.00

01:47:00.000 Someone killed you with a kettlebell? 1.00

01:47:02.000 Just being tied up by some Russian thugs and being fucked up. 1.00

01:47:05.000 Look at that. 0.99

01:47:07.000 It said, Family members told Russian news media in November that they thought Leslin had suffered a heart attack.

01:47:14.000 That's when they put that down in November.

01:47:17.000 So when was this article where they decided that, this is really recently, it's March.

01:47:21.000 Yeah.

01:47:21.000 Yeah, see, so there's all those months that went by before it was announced that he was killed.

01:47:27.000 God.

01:47:27.000 In a hotel beat to death.

01:47:28.000 And now they've been caught just blatantly cheating.

01:47:32.000 In the Olympics.

01:47:33.000 Yeah, but this is a guy that says this.

01:47:35.000 I don't know that there's been...

01:47:37.000 I've read the article.

01:47:38.000 I don't know that there's been definitive proof that everything he's saying is true, that he hasn't exaggerated something.

01:47:44.000 Well, the New York Times ran two articles on their front page, and if the New York Times is going to do that, they've checked their sources.

01:47:49.000 Yeah, but it's not a matter of checking sources.

01:47:51.000 Like, what is the physical evidence that you have?

01:47:55.000 The physical proof, yeah.

01:47:56.000 There very well could be a story there that the New York Times must run, and I'm sure that they check their sources.

01:48:02.000 But is there anything that they can hold up and say, this needs to be examined because this is proof positive that...

01:48:08.000 No, it'd be everywhere if they did that.

01:48:10.000 It'd be on CNN. Yeah, so I don't think it's there yet.

01:48:13.000 But...

01:48:14.000 Look, it's 100% going on.

01:48:16.000 Is anyone surprised?

01:48:18.000 No.

01:48:19.000 Of course not.

01:48:20.000 Well, Nowitzki told me straight up that they're figuring out a way to move around these things.

01:48:24.000 Sure.

01:48:24.000 And that while he's doing this, he's like, I always know.

01:48:27.000 And Nowitzki is Jeff Nowitzki, who's the guy who caught Lance Armstrong, who's the guy who works for the UFC now.

01:48:32.000 For people listening to this.

01:48:33.000 AKA the Golden Snitch.

01:48:34.000 Yeah, he's the guy that catches guys doing everything.

01:48:38.000 And, you know, they're on top of the latest and the greatest.

01:48:41.000 For $32 million of the government's money.

01:48:43.000 And the latest, I know, he doesn't want to admit that.

01:48:45.000 Our money.

01:48:46.000 Our taxpayer money.

01:48:47.000 He wants to pretend it was way less than that.

01:48:48.000 He was giving me like a figure on the show.

01:48:50.000 I heard.

01:48:50.000 That's why Lance Armstrong came on the show.

01:48:52.000 Because what he's not counting is like salaries and flights and all this stuff.

01:48:56.000 What they're counting is like the amount of money they actually had to spend like on vouchers.

01:49:00.000 So that's the government.

01:49:01.000 So that's the federal government with unlimited resources spending 32 million dollars on a cyclist Still going after him, by the way.

01:49:10.000 Still going after him.

01:49:11.000 They're going after him now for $100 million still because they said he defrauded the government of how much they paid him because he raced for the post office. 1.00

01:49:20.000 Who gives a shit? 0.99

01:49:21.000 But it's your tax dollars. 0.99

01:49:22.000 But here's the thing.

01:49:23.000 If you race for the post office, the post office is the government, so they charge you for three times what you took.

01:49:28.000 So if you took 33, they'd charge them for a million. 1.00

01:49:31.000 How stupid is it? 1.00

01:49:32.000 It's called tyranny. 1.00

01:49:32.000 For riding a bike. 1.00

01:49:33.000 Yeah, 33. They go after him for 100. Write a letter.

01:49:36.000 Write a letter to the government.

01:49:37.000 See what happens.

01:49:38.000 Is Nowitzki the ultimate golden snitch?

01:49:40.000 No.

01:49:40.000 Why do you say golden snitch?

01:49:41.000 Golden, because he's at another level.

01:49:43.000 But he's not a snitch.

01:49:45.000 He's an investigator.

01:49:46.000 He's not like a guy who's involved.

01:49:47.000 A snitch would be Victor Conte.

01:49:49.000 Victor Conte's a snitch.

01:49:50.000 He got caught rattled on him.

01:49:52.000 But he didn't even rat on people when he got caught.

01:49:54.000 You can't even call him a snitch.

01:49:56.000 You call him a post-operative.

01:49:58.000 Victor Conte?

01:49:59.000 He used to do it.

01:49:59.000 We call them rats where I come from.

01:50:01.000 See, here's the thing.

01:50:02.000 He used to be involved in it.

01:50:04.000 He's not involved in it anymore.

01:50:05.000 Now he's going after people who are involved in it.

01:50:07.000 So what is that?

01:50:09.000 That's like an informer.

01:50:10.000 Yeah, but can I ask you a question?

01:50:12.000 Did they ever actually...

01:50:13.000 Jamie says yes.

01:50:13.000 That's not a snitch.

01:50:14.000 It'd kind of be a snitch because he's revealing all this backstory.

01:50:18.000 Right, but he could be reformed and since he primarily concentrates on combat sports athletes, you could see him as a...

01:50:25.000 He's helping people.

01:50:27.000 Like he's keeping people from cheating and hurting people.

01:50:30.000 Content.

01:50:31.000 Could you see it that way?

01:50:32.000 Sure.

01:50:33.000 But he benefited, the reason why he has a name, the reason why he got so big is because he was helping so many big name athletes, and then now he's against it.

01:50:42.000 But should that, should the fact that he was helping all those big name athletes, should that disclude him from being able to realize the error of his ways and make an attempt to try to clean up the sport?

01:50:52.000 Is that possible?

01:50:53.000 It's possible.

01:50:53.000 It's possible, right?

01:50:54.000 It's possible.

01:50:55.000 That's how I'd hope to look at it.

01:50:57.000 Did they ever find physical evidence, physical evidence, a test that showed that Lance Armstrong actually cheated?

01:51:04.000 No.

01:51:04.000 No, that's never common.

01:51:05.000 They never did.

01:51:06.000 So 500 tests or whatever it was.

01:51:08.000 Whatever it was.

01:51:08.000 Passed all of them.

01:51:09.000 He passed all of them.

01:51:10.000 $32 million later, but finally he admits that he used performance-enhancing drugs.

01:51:15.000 Yep.

01:51:15.000 To Oprah.

01:51:16.000 Yeah.

01:51:16.000 But...

01:51:18.000 It's very interesting to me.

01:51:19.000 What do you think the benefit of that was?

01:51:23.000 And I do think that there's a benefit to going after people who are cheating, who are trying to change the playing field.

01:51:28.000 I know everybody does.

01:51:29.000 Not riding a bike.

01:51:29.000 I know everybody does.

01:51:31.000 But it's a difficult thing because...

01:51:34.000 Well, first of all, it's not an American game.

01:51:36.000 You're in another country.

01:51:37.000 So you're giving someone some sort of, you're investigating them being involved in something that's not even taking place on American soil.

01:51:46.000 So that's the dubious right there.

01:51:48.000 Right.

01:51:49.000 Second of all, you are saying as the post office, you're suing this guy for all the money that he made while he was cheating and using drugs. 0.99

01:51:55.000 If you don't know that cyclists are cheating, what the fuck are you doing in the cyclist business? 0.98

01:51:59.000 Because I know, I'm a comedian living in LA, and I know they're all cheating. 0.99

01:52:03.000 Exactly.

01:52:04.000 But the other thing is, how much did he do for the U.S. Postal Office?

01:52:07.000 And also, we didn't give a fuck about cycling until Lance Armstrong started kicking ass. 0.99

01:52:12.000 And how much money did he raise for all this cancer awareness? 0.99

01:52:15.000 How many people were wearing those yellow wristbands?

01:52:17.000 But that doesn't...

01:52:20.000 Here's the issue. 0.99

01:52:21.000 This is where he fucked up. 0.99

01:52:22.000 He sued a bunch of people that were telling the truth. 1.00

01:52:24.000 And he used his money. 1.00

01:52:25.000 That's where he fucked up. 0.99

01:52:27.000 That's where he's a bad guy in that part. 0.99

01:52:28.000 But also in his sport, you have to go down to 15th place.

01:52:31.000 They were all doing it.

01:52:32.000 It's a level playing field.

01:52:33.000 Right.

01:52:34.000 So it was about everybody was ratting on everybody.

01:52:38.000 They got caught.

01:52:39.000 They were giving people up.

01:52:40.000 There was a lot of that going on.

01:52:42.000 And Lance Armstrong started suing people when they were giving up him.

01:52:45.000 That is where people have an issue with it.

01:52:48.000 Me too.

01:52:48.000 And with his mind, he's protecting himself.

01:52:50.000 Yeah, exactly.

01:52:52.000 And I can see both sides, but I'm with Lance Armstrong.

01:52:54.000 Like, dude, you're snitching on me.

01:52:56.000 I gotta protect myself too.

01:52:57.000 Exactly.

01:52:58.000 And you guys started first snitching on me.

01:53:00.000 And the snitching, if we're boys, the snitching is worse than the lawsuit.

01:53:00.000 Right.

01:53:05.000 By far.

01:53:06.000 By far.

01:53:06.000 Especially if we're a team.

01:53:07.000 We represent America.

01:53:07.000 Yes.

01:53:09.000 But some of those guys weren't his boys anymore.

01:53:11.000 So why snitch, though?

01:53:11.000 They didn't like him anymore.

01:53:12.000 Very few people liked Lance.

01:53:13.000 I'm with you.

01:53:14.000 Did you get anything out of it?

01:53:15.000 I'm with you.

01:53:16.000 I didn't want to say the word.

01:53:18.000 But a lot of people didn't like Lance Armstrong.

01:53:21.000 They had to dislike him. 0.99

01:53:22.000 The same reason why they don't like fucking Michael Jordan. 0.99

01:53:24.000 Let me tell you something. 0.99

01:53:25.000 Lance Armstrong was on the podcast.

01:53:26.000 He wanted to know what number the podcast had gotten up to.

01:53:29.000 What's it up to?

01:53:30.000 Is it up to number one yet?

01:53:31.000 Because it was like number two in the country.

01:53:32.000 Tell me when it hits number one.

01:53:33.000 I want to hit number one in the country.

01:53:35.000 I want to let him know.

01:53:35.000 That's the only way he can relate.

01:53:36.000 How many downloads are we getting?

01:53:37.000 He wants to know.

01:53:38.000 Is he getting more than other people's downloads?

01:53:40.000 He goes, I'm real crazy.

01:53:41.000 He's opening about it.

01:53:42.000 He laughs about it. 0.99

01:53:43.000 He's like, I'm fucking competitive. 0.98

01:53:44.000 You know me. 0.97

01:53:45.000 He wanted to have the number one podcast of all time.

01:53:45.000 I'm competitive.

01:53:48.000 I don't think that way. 1.00

01:53:50.000 That's why you're not Lance Armstrong, bitch. 1.00

01:53:50.000 Fuck, I wish I did. 1.00

01:53:52.000 That's why he just wrestled in high school. 1.00

01:53:55.000 Hey, I did jiu-jitsu with Henzo Gracie and I got my blue belt.

01:53:58.000 You got your what?

01:53:59.000 My blue belt.

01:54:00.000 I thought you said you had your purple belt.

01:54:01.000 No, I never said that.

01:54:02.000 Wait a minute.

01:54:03.000 Never once.

01:54:03.000 Wait a minute.

01:54:04.000 We have to go back to the archives.

01:54:05.000 I didn't want to touch on it.

01:54:06.000 I've never said that ever in my life.

01:54:09.000 Did he say he had his purple belt?

01:54:10.000 No, I've never said that.

01:54:11.000 I'm so confused.

01:54:12.000 I don't know.

01:54:12.000 What do you mean you don't know?

01:54:13.000 I don't lie.

01:54:14.000 Wait a minute.

01:54:15.000 I don't lie.

01:54:16.000 There's lies and then there are lies. 0.84

01:54:18.000 Anybody who says they're a purple belt is a liar.

01:54:20.000 I'm a liar, but I'm not a liar.

01:54:22.000 You know what I mean?

01:54:23.000 You definitely didn't say you're a purple belt?

01:54:24.000 No!

01:54:25.000 I never said I was a purple belt.

01:54:26.000 Accidentally once, a little bit drunk.

01:54:28.000 I never even said I tapped a purple belt.

01:54:29.000 A little drunk.

01:54:30.000 Probably did once.

01:54:32.000 All I'm saying, B, is the reason why he's Lance Armstrong is because he's competitive at everything.

01:54:37.000 Anyone who's an ultra winner, you could be...

01:54:39.000 I just said I wish I was like that.

01:54:40.000 I'm not.

01:54:41.000 I just never have been.

01:54:42.000 Why would you wish you were like that?

01:54:43.000 Because what you are is awesome.

01:54:44.000 Because I want to be a cyclist.

01:54:45.000 No, dude.

01:54:46.000 What you want to be is...

01:54:47.000 What you are is a guy who always wants to be something other than you are.

01:54:51.000 Exactly.

01:54:52.000 And that's part of the fun of being around Brian Callen.

01:54:54.000 I spent a lot of time.

01:54:55.000 God, I wish I was that guy.

01:54:56.000 And then you go into this romanticized version of what that guy is.

01:54:59.000 Meanwhile, that guy lives living in Austin and people throwing eggs at his house.

01:54:59.000 Yes.

01:55:02.000 Yeah, that guy can't post social media or nothing without getting hate.

01:55:05.000 It's sort of relaxing a bit now, but I mean, dude, when the storm comes your way, like when you get in trouble for something along those lines, the storm of being a national disgrace and someone who everyone's angry at, and there's so much going on with the lawsuits and the And he's still involved in the lawsuit with the post office.

01:55:24.000 The storm of pressure and stress is probably overwhelming and never-ending. 0.91

01:55:29.000 But it also gives everyone now a voice on social media who's never done shit in their lives to fucking contribute and try and shit on Lance Robson, one of the greatest athletes of all time. 0.99

01:55:39.000 Oh, fuck yeah. 1.00

01:55:40.000 I'm gonna fuck with this guy now. 1.00

01:55:41.000 Oh, you post a picture of your kids at Christmas? 1.00

01:55:43.000 Oh, fuck these kids. 1.00

01:55:45.000 Where's their steroids at? 1.00

01:55:46.000 Alright, man.

01:55:47.000 Hope you feel better about yourself.

01:55:48.000 He's still killing it.

01:55:49.000 He's still living in a mansion.

01:55:51.000 Yeah, I mean, it's just part of the program.

01:55:54.000 It's what comes with the program.

01:55:55.000 And I don't think he's a bad guy.

01:55:57.000 It was amazing talking to him.

01:55:57.000 No.

01:55:58.000 Great podcast.

01:55:59.000 I listened to it.

01:56:00.000 He's my buddy now.

01:56:01.000 We text each other. 0.99

01:56:01.000 It's bizarre as fuck. 0.99

01:56:02.000 I get a text every now and then from Lance Armstrong. 0.97

01:56:02.000 Awesome. 0.97

01:56:05.000 He's the man.

01:56:05.000 Like when Dan Bilzerian was doing that bet.

01:56:09.000 You know, he's doing a bet where he rode a bike to Las Vegas.

01:56:12.000 I didn't see it.

01:56:12.000 Yeah, well, I don't know if he's talked about it publicly.

01:56:16.000 I don't know if he's talked about the fact that he did it.

01:56:19.000 Anyway, Lance Armstrong texted me.

01:56:21.000 He's like, you know Dan Bilzerian?

01:56:22.000 Hook us up.

01:56:23.000 I want to help him. 0.99

01:56:24.000 So fucking Lance Armstrong helps Dan Bilzerian train for this thing where he's got to ride to Vegas in 30 hours. 0.99

01:56:30.000 He's like, he could totally do it. 0.99

01:56:31.000 It's totally doable.

01:56:31.000 How did Bilzerian make his money?

01:56:33.000 That's a good question.

01:56:34.000 I don't know.

01:56:35.000 I think his parents had money.

01:56:36.000 That's what they think.

01:56:38.000 And this is going what I know from the internet, is they're saying...

01:56:42.000 I love how you do that with air quotes.

01:56:45.000 Also known as the underworld.

01:56:50.000 He was playing that he has all this money and all this stuff from being one of these top poker players in the world, but it came out that he comes from a lot of money.

01:56:57.000 So he puts on this lifestyle, like this baller. 0.59

01:57:02.000 Was drafting against the rules?

01:57:04.000 It wasn't a lot of draft.

01:57:05.000 That's why he did most of the trip, I think, is behind a van like that.

01:57:09.000 Oh, where someone drove the van?

01:57:12.000 Well, his beard is a major air drag.

01:57:14.000 Yeah.

01:57:14.000 Well, that's a big deal.

01:57:16.000 I know.

01:57:16.000 I mean, I don't know if it wasn't within the rules.

01:57:17.000 Maybe he should have set the rules before they made that bet.

01:57:20.000 Especially if the wind is headed his face.

01:57:23.000 Hashtag y'all got hustled.

01:57:24.000 If the wind is headed towards his face.

01:57:26.000 But you know what? 0.99

01:57:26.000 If they didn't put that in the rules, they fucked up. 0.99

01:57:28.000 Because Bilzerian's a smart bitch. 1.00

01:57:30.000 And look what he's got, too. 1.00

01:57:31.000 The van's back doors are open. 0.99

01:57:33.000 So they could have a fan blowing on him with, like, misters and shit. 1.00

01:57:36.000 He's a pimp. 1.00

01:57:38.000 How do you not love that guy? 1.00

01:57:39.000 Every picture he takes, he's got a hundred whores with him. 1.00

01:57:41.000 And I say whores, I say that with all love. 0.99

01:57:43.000 All love and due respect. 0.97

01:57:44.000 All those great humans.

01:57:46.000 Private jets.

01:57:47.000 I should say he has a hundred beautiful women with him, because that's what he does. 0.99

01:57:50.000 But that's part of his image.

01:57:52.000 That's all personas.

01:57:53.000 They're like Charlie's Angels.

01:57:54.000 That's a lot of work.

01:57:54.000 I don't know.

01:57:55.000 Actually, it is worth dilating on a little bit.

01:57:59.000 I don't know.

01:58:00.000 It's just not that inspiring to me.

01:58:02.000 Are you smacking your lips like that?

01:58:03.000 What are you doing?

01:58:05.000 What's going on with your legs?

01:58:08.000 I can tell you right now, what Brian's trying to do is say that he's not a fan of this guy.

01:58:12.000 He's trying to be very PC of it.

01:58:13.000 I sure am. 0.96

01:58:13.000 Because you never fucking draw the line with anything. 0.96

01:58:16.000 I just don't. 0.96

01:58:16.000 I just don't like this culture that is essentially celebrating itself. 0.96

01:58:21.000 I just don't...

01:58:22.000 That's not a guy to hang out with when you're that happy with yourself and you think, hey, you know, I was going to tell...

01:58:26.000 I met him.

01:58:27.000 My business manager saying spending $125,000 on a private jet was a bad idea.

01:58:27.000 He's a nice guy.

01:58:32.000 I disagree with this naked girl. 1.00

01:58:34.000 All right.

01:58:34.000 I'm sure I'd love hanging out with him, but it's just not that inspiring to me.

01:58:37.000 But you have to realize that people doing this are akin in a lot of ways to gangster rappers.

01:58:37.000 Oh, no.

01:58:43.000 What they're doing is putting out an image.

01:58:46.000 That image becomes popular.

01:58:47.000 That popular image equates to millions and millions of followers on Instagram because he's manipulated the media.

01:58:53.000 Ugh, to all of it, though.

01:58:55.000 But he can use that to promote himself in all sorts of different ways, and then he becomes a business.

01:58:59.000 Promote himself.

01:59:00.000 But that's what you do when you're promoting shows.

01:59:00.000 Exactly.

01:59:02.000 What I'm saying is, like, a person promotes himself on Instagram, where it's a girl who's got yoga pants and a nice big butt, and she makes money all of a sudden doing squats.

01:59:10.000 I mean, there's a lot of those people.

01:59:10.000 Yeah, not mad at her.

01:59:12.000 But there's a difference.

01:59:13.000 Yeah, look at that.

01:59:13.000 17 million followers.

01:59:14.000 But Brian, what's the difference between a girl sticking her butt out or him? 0.99

01:59:17.000 He's got 17 million Instagram followers.

01:59:20.000 You're just saying it's not inspiring.

01:59:20.000 There's no difference.

01:59:21.000 Yeah, I'm saying that at least, like, don't you think?

01:59:24.000 It's a little bit maybe like the difference between you see a body that's built for something.

01:59:29.000 Like, if you look at Joe Schilling's body, it's built for a purpose.

01:59:32.000 And then you see somebody who's a bodybuilder.

01:59:34.000 All due respect, a bodybuilder is a hard thing to do. 0.99

01:59:36.000 Click on a girl's butt. 1.00

01:59:37.000 Yeah, please. 0.99

01:59:38.000 I don't know.

01:59:38.000 It's just not that cool.

01:59:39.000 This has 343,000 lights, Brian.

01:59:41.000 Brian, you're saying he doesn't have skills.

01:59:43.000 You're saying he doesn't possess a skill?

01:59:45.000 His skill is self-promotion, but it ends there.

01:59:47.000 So it's a self-contained thing, yeah.

01:59:49.000 But you say that, but how do you know?

01:59:50.000 Because he's also a professional poker player.

01:59:52.000 He makes millions of dollars gambling.

01:59:54.000 So they say.

01:59:55.000 That's debatable.

01:59:55.000 So they say.

01:59:56.000 Is it debatable? 1.00

01:59:57.000 Well, didn't he win this fucking debate? 0.99

01:59:57.000 Yes. 0.99

01:59:59.000 He won this million-dollar bet to go to Vegas.

02:00:01.000 I know, but...

02:00:02.000 I mean, he did it.

02:00:03.000 He worked hard for five weeks to do that.

02:00:03.000 I mean, he worked hard.

02:00:05.000 It's not like an empty guy with no character.

02:00:07.000 It might be just a wild...

02:00:08.000 I don't know him.

02:00:09.000 That's what I'm saying.

02:00:09.000 I don't know him.

02:00:10.000 He might be a business beast. 1.00

02:00:11.000 He might be a wild, fun-seeking motherfucker that's actually pulling it off. 0.99

02:00:15.000 He's a marketing genius. 1.00

02:00:16.000 If you were a guy who didn't have any set of skills and all of a sudden by hook or by crook or by luck or by fuck, you find yourself with $100 million. 1.00

02:00:23.000 Oh, my God. 1.00

02:00:24.000 I'm running with it.

02:00:24.000 Wouldn't you want to live like this?

02:00:25.000 No.

02:00:26.000 If you don't have any kids, you got a mansion on top of the hill, and you don't have any skills?

02:00:30.000 I'd try to make a difference.

02:00:30.000 No, I wouldn't.

02:00:32.000 Brian, you hang out with people that are way more shallow than him, so shut the fuck up. 1.00

02:00:36.000 No, I don't. 1.00

02:00:37.000 I do not, sir.

02:00:38.000 You are wrong.

02:00:39.000 Hold on.

02:00:39.000 Stop for a second and just consider this.

02:00:41.000 I don't want to attack you. 0.99

02:00:42.000 Did we not talk about someone before this show that you used to hang out with all the time that is equally as fucked up as that guy? 0.99

02:00:50.000 I'm trying to think of who. 0.99

02:00:52.000 Whatever.

02:00:52.000 Do you mean right before this show?

02:00:53.000 Yeah.

02:00:54.000 That's just too complicated.

02:00:56.000 Listen, I don't know the guy.

02:00:59.000 I've met him.

02:00:59.000 He seems nice.

02:01:00.000 I know.

02:01:01.000 Brian likes that guy because he has skills.

02:01:01.000 I'm just saying.

02:01:03.000 I don't think he has to be.

02:01:05.000 If you give me $100 million, listen, you give me $100 million, you know what I'm going to do?

02:01:08.000 The responsibility.

02:01:09.000 I'm going to try to make a difference in the world.

02:01:09.000 Don't say charity.

02:01:13.000 And you're trying to do that now?

02:01:15.000 I am.

02:01:16.000 At least with the skills that I have.

02:01:18.000 What are you doing?

02:01:18.000 Well, I'm trying to be as original as I can be.

02:01:20.000 But you're like an open up charity bee.

02:01:21.000 Brian, you're doing that because you enjoy it, because you're entertaining people.

02:01:24.000 Okay, you're not going out seeking to make a difference in the world.

02:01:28.000 You're going out having a good time, doing a good thing, doing Doing a good act.

02:01:32.000 That's exactly right.

02:01:33.000 But I also do try to make a difference in the world in my own way, charity-wise and things like that.

02:01:38.000 I do.

02:01:39.000 I spend money on charity.

02:01:41.000 I spend money trying to make the world better.

02:01:43.000 If you give me $100 million, I'm going to do that.

02:01:45.000 You're not a guy who's really promoting charities a lot and talking about it a lot and giving money to GoFundMe's.

02:01:45.000 But let's be honest.

02:01:50.000 No, but at least what I'm trying to do is go, let's just take stand-up.

02:01:55.000 You're talking to two friends here.

02:01:56.000 Let's just take stand-up. 0.96

02:01:57.000 Let's take stand-up. 0.91

02:01:58.000 So stand-up for me, at least what I'm trying to do in my own mind is surprise myself and come up with, you know, see what I'm made of.

02:02:06.000 Right, you're entertaining people doing your thing, right?

02:02:09.000 It's not your way of giving back.

02:02:10.000 This is not a criticism of your stand-up.

02:02:12.000 I think you're hilarious.

02:02:13.000 You know I love you.

02:02:14.000 I think you're awesome.

02:02:15.000 What I'm saying is that I think there's a difference between the skill of stand-up, for example, and coming up with a body of work and taking all that money and shooting guns and being on a private jet and having chicks around, right? 0.87

02:02:26.000 How do we know he's not giving to charity, though?

02:02:26.000 See, here's the problem.

02:02:28.000 Listen, man, you don't know that.

02:02:29.000 And here's the other thing.

02:02:30.000 He might be.

02:02:31.000 He might not be.

02:02:31.000 I don't know.

02:02:32.000 Who knows?

02:02:33.000 But what I'm seeing is a show.

02:02:34.000 It's a very short snippet show. 0.97

02:02:36.000 What you just saw there, when he's walking by that girl's butt and he's got a machine gun. 0.97

02:02:40.000 I was in. 0.96

02:02:41.000 Not only are you in, but here's the thing.

02:02:44.000 Obviously, this is staged. 1.00

02:02:46.000 This is a fucking show. 1.00

02:02:47.000 There is a camera behind him. 1.00

02:02:48.000 Especially the way it was shot.

02:02:49.000 There's a camera behind him.

02:02:49.000 Yeah.

02:02:51.000 He's moving in slow-mo.

02:02:52.000 He's got a bandolier on, dude. 0.99

02:02:54.000 Do you not see how ridiculous this is? 0.97

02:02:56.000 Yeah, I do stand-up like that. 0.97

02:02:57.000 Brian, listen, let's just open-minded.

02:03:00.000 You're watching the video, he's in a dune buggy with all these hot chicks. 0.99

02:03:03.000 Do you think this is really happening?

02:03:05.000 That they just get clandestine, you know, just unnoticed video of him driving around this dune buggy with all these hot chicks?

02:03:13.000 No, he hired someone!

02:03:15.000 Look at this.

02:03:16.000 He's walking in slow motion with his bandolier.

02:03:18.000 The girls are laughing.

02:03:20.000 Those hoes are all rented for the day. 1.00

02:03:21.000 This is a goddamn show. 1.00

02:03:22.000 This is a show. 1.00

02:03:23.000 I'm with you.

02:03:24.000 All I'm saying is even if you got $100 million, you're not becoming Mother Teresa.

02:03:28.000 No one here is.

02:03:29.000 No, I'm not, but I'm just saying that...

02:03:30.000 Don't pretend that.

02:03:30.000 That's the only issue I have.

02:03:31.000 I'm not.

02:03:32.000 I'm just not.

02:03:33.000 All I said was I don't find it that inspiring.

02:03:34.000 No one says it is.

02:03:36.000 We're not inspired.

02:03:37.000 We're not saying, Jesus Christ, Dan Bilzerian makes me want to go give money to charity.

02:03:41.000 I'm just saying, why even be upset?

02:03:41.000 No!

02:03:44.000 I'm not upset.

02:03:45.000 I'm not upset.

02:03:45.000 I'm saying that to me...

02:03:46.000 What if was all that sucking your teeth and crossing your legs? 0.78

02:03:48.000 I like being dramatic.

02:03:49.000 First of all, I like being dramatic.

02:03:50.000 But first of all, I'm being inspired by him.

02:03:53.000 I was being theatrical.

02:03:54.000 I know.

02:03:55.000 That's what we're calling you out on.

02:03:57.000 But hold on.

02:03:58.000 Hold on.

02:03:58.000 You have to...

02:03:59.000 There is criteria for how to live your life.

02:04:03.000 There's criteria for how to live your life.

02:04:04.000 And I think if you spend $125,000 on whatever, on looking great and celebrating yourself, I just think it kind of...

02:04:13.000 It's just not really...

02:04:15.000 Yeah.

02:04:16.000 What if the whole marketing plan, though?

02:04:18.000 But it's a brilliant marketing plan.

02:04:20.000 I get that it might not be your thing.

02:04:22.000 Bless this guy.

02:04:23.000 Dude, it doesn't have to be your thing.

02:04:25.000 That's exactly what I do with my money.

02:04:26.000 My point is, to me, it's not offensive at all.

02:04:30.000 It's no more offensive than the Kardashians.

02:04:32.000 The Kardashians don't offend me.

02:04:33.000 I mean, I can make fun of it all day long, but I'm not offended by what they're doing.

02:04:37.000 I don't think anything's wrong with it.

02:04:38.000 I do.

02:04:39.000 It's self-celebration, and I find that very...

02:04:42.000 It's not my favorite thing, but it doesn't bother me.

02:04:45.000 I think this guy is funny.

02:04:47.000 I think this Instagram, what I'm taking out of this, to me, is amusement and humor.

02:04:52.000 This is what I'm getting.

02:04:53.000 I see it as a persona, like it's a gimmick.

02:04:56.000 Look at that picture on the couch.

02:04:58.000 To me, this is an exaggeration of all the stereotypes of some super rich Hey, look at me.

02:05:10.000 What if this is his life, though?

02:05:12.000 It's just random pictures.

02:05:13.000 How sick would that be?

02:05:15.000 Listen, it is.

02:05:16.000 I mean, just think about it.

02:05:18.000 It is his life. 0.99

02:05:19.000 He's taking these photos with these girls, and I'm sure some of them have sex with him. 1.00

02:05:25.000 Yeah, I hope so. 0.99

02:05:27.000 100%!

02:05:28.000 Otherwise, he's doing it wrong.

02:05:30.000 He legitimately has unbelievable amounts of money.

02:05:34.000 He's got a mansion in the Hollywood Hills.

02:05:37.000 How weird is that?

02:05:38.000 These girls are around just because you have money and you know it. 1.00

02:05:45.000 I wouldn't care.

02:05:45.000 Who cares?

02:05:47.000 Here's the thing.

02:05:48.000 He's a good-looking guy.

02:05:49.000 He's not a bad-looking guy.

02:05:50.000 He's a manly dude.

02:05:50.000 No, he's not bad-looking.

02:05:51.000 He's not going to be in front of GQ. Yeah, he's not bad.

02:05:53.000 But I mean, here's the thing.

02:05:54.000 Remember we were talking about the Sultan of Brunei?

02:05:56.000 Yeah. 0.98

02:05:57.000 Who hires these girls and he pays them like thousands of dollars a day to hang out at his house and he fucks them occasionally. 1.00

02:06:05.000 He decides who he wants to fuck. 0.99

02:06:06.000 He has like a whole disco built into one of his palaces. 0.99

02:06:10.000 He's a prince.

02:06:10.000 And he comes down.

02:06:11.000 He sashays through the fucking room naked. 1.00

02:06:13.000 Does whatever the fuck he wants. 1.00

02:06:14.000 This guy's awesome. 0.99

02:06:15.000 He's like Aladdin.

02:06:15.000 Yeah.

02:06:16.000 And he just picks the girls who wants to bang and brings them up to his room. 0.97

02:06:19.000 But all of them are getting ungodly amounts of money and jewelry and diamonds and all this shit. 0.98

02:06:23.000 So we look at that guy and we don't have a problem with it. 0.99

02:06:26.000 Well, I never said I didn't have a problem with it.

02:06:27.000 Do you have a problem with it?

02:06:28.000 I don't have a problem with that.

02:06:30.000 Gold Royals Royce, son!

02:06:31.000 What's up, son? 0.73

02:06:33.000 Bitches and Gold Royals Royces? 1.00

02:06:35.000 He has like a hundred Ferraris.

02:06:37.000 Yeah, yeah, yeah. 1.00

02:06:38.000 Bam, bitch! 1.00

02:06:38.000 Look at him. 1.00

02:06:39.000 Killing the game.

02:06:40.000 Yeah, but killing what game? 0.90

02:06:42.000 Killing gold.

02:06:43.000 Killing the golden genie game.

02:06:45.000 He's killing the life game.

02:06:46.000 He's killing the real Aladdin.

02:06:48.000 Golotny and excess and vanity.

02:06:51.000 It is, right?

02:06:51.000 Oh, Brian.

02:06:52.000 But yeah, of course.

02:06:53.000 Yeah.

02:06:54.000 But you're doing duh.

02:06:56.000 Like, duh.

02:06:57.000 Duh, it's gluttony, but it's hilarious. 0.99

02:06:59.000 He might be doing some shit for his people, though, too, B. Oh, yeah. 0.99

02:07:02.000 How about not? 0.99

02:07:02.000 He might. 0.99

02:07:04.000 Maybe.

02:07:04.000 He might be.

02:07:05.000 We don't know.

02:07:06.000 Take it easy.

02:07:06.000 We don't know.

02:07:07.000 That's the thing.

02:07:08.000 That's his fleet of cars.

02:07:09.000 That's one of them.

02:07:10.000 If that's his value system, it's okay.

02:07:12.000 Oh, Brian.

02:07:13.000 Right?

02:07:16.000 My problem with you is you're acting like your mother Teresa.

02:07:18.000 I'm not. 1.00

02:07:19.000 You're doing all this charity shit. 0.99

02:07:20.000 I'm not. 0.99

02:07:21.000 What I'm coming down to the fact is that we do live in a culture that somehow celebrates that and I just find it kind of boring.

02:07:29.000 It is.

02:07:29.000 It is, but Kim Kardashian world.

02:07:32.000 Exactly.

02:07:33.000 But you don't have to celebrate it to enjoy it.

02:07:35.000 Like, look, it is what it is.

02:07:37.000 It's part of the folly of humanity.

02:07:39.000 That's our society.

02:07:39.000 Yes.

02:07:40.000 I think it's amusing.

02:07:41.000 You're taking a sense of humor, and you should take a humorous approach to it. 0.94

02:07:46.000 And I bet you that guy Dan Bilzerian is probably actually a funny guy and a silly goose, I would imagine.

02:07:50.000 When I met him, he was very nice.

02:07:51.000 He also doesn't know him that well. 0.99

02:07:53.000 I don't give a shit what he does. 0.99

02:07:55.000 This concerns me. 0.99

02:07:59.000 Disconcerned.

02:07:59.000 This is what's matter with the world.

02:08:02.000 He's an expression of kind of what this culture has to offer.

02:08:05.000 Whenever you make a point and I see you're wearing boots and these are like Italian handmade leather zip-up boots.

02:08:13.000 When I see that and you cross your legs in this really elegant way that I can't even do.

02:08:17.000 You can't do that.

02:08:18.000 I know you can't cross your legs like this.

02:08:19.000 Dude, I got a flexible hideous. 1.00

02:08:20.000 It's that fat dick. 1.00

02:08:21.000 You got a fat one. 1.00

02:08:22.000 But I also have fat legs. 1.00

02:08:22.000 Yeah, I got a fat dick. 1.00

02:08:24.000 It ain't happening. 1.00

02:08:25.000 It's the leg thing.

02:08:26.000 I got skinny jeans on.

02:08:27.000 It ain't happening. 0.99

02:08:27.000 I tape my genitals down in my armpit. 0.99

02:08:30.000 By the way, I see you're wearing the fucking stretchy jeans. 1.00

02:08:34.000 You were wearing them when you were doing Fighter and the Kid. 0.99

02:08:36.000 Are you wearing them now?

02:08:36.000 That's all I wear now.

02:08:37.000 These are my 5'4 jeans.

02:08:39.000 You gotta throw those out.

02:08:40.000 No, no, no.

02:08:40.000 I wear the barbell.

02:08:42.000 I wear the barbell jeans or my 5'4s.

02:08:44.000 5'4s, these are the stretchy jeans.

02:08:46.000 That's what I wheel kicked in.

02:08:47.000 Oh, they stretch too?

02:08:48.000 Yes, sir.

02:08:48.000 Why do you guys need stretchy jeans?

02:08:49.000 Because I feel so good.

02:08:50.000 Because I got huge legs.

02:08:51.000 I got huge legs. 1.00

02:08:52.000 Wear some fucking joggers. 1.00

02:08:53.000 No, no, no, no. 1.00

02:08:54.000 I'm telling you, man.

02:08:54.000 Don't send me jeans, Joe.

02:08:55.000 These jeans?

02:08:56.000 Don't send me jeans.

02:08:56.000 These jeans are like wearing sweatpants.

02:08:58.000 They're like wearing sweatpants.

02:09:00.000 We both have blowout. 1.00

02:09:01.000 We have blowout asses and big thighs. 1.00

02:09:02.000 There's some people now that sell, they call them like the brand of stretchy. 0.99

02:09:07.000 They're calling them like Rogan jeans.

02:09:09.000 I know there's already a company called Rogan jeans.

02:09:12.000 Make them.

02:09:12.000 Right?

02:09:12.000 There's already a company called Rogan jeans that somebody made.

02:09:15.000 But this is like a type, like some people are selling stretchy ones.

02:09:18.000 I mean, I think stretchy is like the new thing.

02:09:19.000 Because I talk about them so often.

02:09:21.000 But yours is stretchy too.

02:09:22.000 I swear to God.

02:09:23.000 Oh, so what are you talking about?

02:09:23.000 It's all I wear now.

02:09:24.000 But you have them, so what are you talking about?

02:09:26.000 Every company has them.

02:09:27.000 They're stretchy jeans if you go to the store.

02:09:29.000 These are skinny stretchy jeans.

02:09:31.000 They've got spandex in them and it's all I wear now.

02:09:34.000 Those barbell jeans are awesome.

02:09:36.000 Dude, regular canvas jeans. 1.00

02:09:38.000 Why don't you wear a potato sack around your dick? 1.00

02:09:40.000 It's stupid. 1.00

02:09:41.000 Sack is all fucking scratchy and itchy. 1.00

02:09:44.000 I won't tell you that's going to hug my fucking legs. 1.00

02:09:46.000 Show off that room. 1.00

02:09:47.000 I used to have to wear Lucky Brand jeans.

02:09:50.000 Because Lucky Brand jeans is a thicker cut.

02:09:52.000 There's a few different companies that will make a thicker cut that will fit my troll-like legs.

02:09:56.000 Well, you've got a small waist but big thighs. 1.00

02:09:58.000 Yeah, and it's my upper thighs are the highest.

02:10:01.000 That's where it's way thicker.

02:10:03.000 It's all kicking stuff.

02:10:05.000 When you do it as a child, it developed in that way.

02:10:09.000 One of the highlights of my life, and I'm a skinny guy, the highlights of my life was when I was at John Varvedo's trying on impossibly expensive jeans and couldn't fit my calves or my upper thighs.

02:10:20.000 They were just too tight.

02:10:20.000 You were so happy.

02:10:21.000 I looked at the guy in Malibu.

02:10:23.000 Your calves and your upper thighs?

02:10:24.000 I got huge calves.

02:10:25.000 I got the biggest calves.

02:10:27.000 Well, they're big for the rest of your body.

02:10:29.000 You said the biggest in the world?

02:10:30.000 But if you were a bodybuilder, I'd be stuffing them filled with oil. 0.98

02:10:33.000 Will Sasso's calves are ridiculous. 0.98

02:10:36.000 They don't even look real. 0.99

02:10:37.000 Bull hearts.

02:10:38.000 He's got bull hearts.

02:10:39.000 It's more like a moose heart.

02:10:40.000 That would be a big one.

02:10:41.000 I got a moose heart in my fridge.

02:10:42.000 Straight up.

02:10:43.000 And it looks just like his calf.

02:10:44.000 Yeah.

02:10:45.000 He's got a couple moose hearts stuffed into his legs.

02:10:47.000 He's a gorilla of a dude.

02:10:49.000 Hilarious.

02:10:49.000 He's one of those guys where you're like, boy, I'm glad he's jolly.

02:10:53.000 Because if he just started running through a room full of people. 1.00

02:10:56.000 We're all fucked. 1.00

02:10:57.000 You included me! 1.00

02:10:58.000 You just bowled me over!

02:11:00.000 I pushed him into a room with a bunch of people who recognized him, and I pushed him into this room and I went, I'm Will Sasso!

02:11:08.000 And everybody looked up and went, yay!

02:11:12.000 And he turned and I tried to hold the door and he pushed the door and sent me into the street.

02:11:19.000 He's 330. He makes me laugh hard.

02:11:22.000 He's the funniest guy.

02:11:23.000 Will Sasso, you should have him on this podcast.

02:11:25.000 To me, him and Zach Galifianakis are the funniest people in the world just off the couch.

02:11:29.000 Didn't he do your podcast recently and bum you out?

02:11:32.000 No, he was bummed because he didn't feel well. 1.00

02:11:34.000 He was sick as fuck. 1.00

02:11:36.000 The first thing he said is, he goes, if you're a homeless person, I don't know why these guys don't grab a seagull, kick it into the ocean, break its wing, and fucking eat it right there. 1.00

02:11:43.000 They're like, alright, this is going to get weird. 0.99

02:11:46.000 He came out, he was just sick.

02:11:47.000 He's like on a bunch of antibiotics and stuff. 0.97

02:11:49.000 Will is fucking hilarious. 0.97

02:11:51.000 Will is jaw-droppingly funny. 0.97

02:11:53.000 Where did we hang out with him last?

02:11:54.000 Was it in Vancouver?

02:11:56.000 After UFC? He's Canadian.

02:11:58.000 I feel like it was at the comedy store, wasn't it?

02:12:00.000 Or in No, we went to dinner with him at a restaurant in Canada somewhere.

02:12:06.000 Yes.

02:12:06.000 Was it Toronto?

02:12:07.000 Maybe it was Toronto.

02:12:08.000 No, no.

02:12:08.000 Where did we do a gig together?

02:12:09.000 Was it Vancouver?

02:12:10.000 No, Toronto.

02:12:12.000 Was it Toronto?

02:12:12.000 Yeah.

02:12:13.000 It was so much fun.

02:12:14.000 We had me that real Steve over there.

02:12:16.000 This?

02:12:16.000 No, the little bottle, brother.

02:12:18.000 Dude, I still am thinking about the show I did.

02:12:21.000 Joe let me do 50 minutes at the Chicago Theater in front of 3,500 people.

02:12:25.000 50. That was pretty cool, man.

02:12:27.000 That was pretty cool.

02:12:28.000 That's pretty awesome.

02:12:29.000 We had a good time.

02:12:31.000 It's funny how a giant crowd like that, though, in some ways, is so different than an intimate crowd.

02:12:36.000 Yeah.

02:12:37.000 Timing's different.

02:12:38.000 Yeah.

02:12:39.000 The laughter kind of rolls and you've got to wait.

02:12:41.000 Whereas, you're not aware of your effect with a huge crowd like that in the same way as you're aware of your effect with 200 people.

02:12:48.000 Have you ever sat...

02:12:49.000 You know what's a really good thing to do is sit in the audience when someone's on stage like that.

02:12:54.000 Have you ever get a chance?

02:12:55.000 I went to see Louis Black.

02:12:57.000 I was working the night after he was at a theater in New Jersey.

02:13:01.000 And me and Diaz went across the street to the theater and we sat down in the audience.

02:13:08.000 We actually got seats in a nice spot.

02:13:10.000 But it was a nice spot in the middle towards the back.

02:13:13.000 And I was amazed at how difficult it is to understand what he's saying once the laughter rolls.

02:13:20.000 Because when you're on stage, you hear your mic, you have monitors that are projecting towards you, and you're saying things, and the punchline hits, and then the people laugh.

02:13:31.000 You have to be real careful what you're saying while people are laughing.

02:13:36.000 Because it's different than a comedy club.

02:13:37.000 In a comedy club, you can just hammer over it.

02:13:39.000 There's 200 people in there, you say something that's funny, they're laughing, and you can add a tag in the middle of it and it makes it even funnier.

02:13:46.000 Joey Diaz is the master of that.

02:13:49.000 In the middle of people laughing, he'll slam Slam me with something else, and then slam me with something else.

02:13:53.000 But in a theater that's like 3,000 plus people, you have to wait.

02:13:58.000 Because when I was sitting in the audience, it occurred to me, like, oh, when people are laughing around you, it's like people yelling at you.

02:14:05.000 They can't hear.

02:14:06.000 Right, right, right.

02:14:07.000 What's up there? 0.98

02:14:07.000 And the speaker's way the fuck over there. 0.98

02:14:09.000 It's so interesting to me. 0.98

02:14:11.000 Wait a minute.

02:14:12.000 Guess who's doing really well with his 10 minutes?

02:14:15.000 We do our live show.

02:14:16.000 I make him get up there.

02:14:18.000 I'm like, you're going to do stand-up.

02:14:19.000 Dude, 900 people in Chicago had him dying for 10 minutes.

02:14:23.000 I looked at his brother and go, your brother's doing stand-up. 1.00

02:14:26.000 He's done this maybe 10 times and he fucking Fucking killing it. 1.00

02:14:29.000 And adding shit in the middle of the act. 1.00

02:14:32.000 Like adding shit I hadn't seen. 1.00

02:14:33.000 Like he's playing with the crowd and reacting and then adding something else. 1.00

02:14:36.000 I was like this is fucking beautiful man. 0.98

02:14:37.000 Well it's totally different than doing this. 0.99

02:14:40.000 Like this without a crowd.

02:14:41.000 Completely different.

02:14:42.000 Oh yeah.

02:14:43.000 Completely different.

02:14:44.000 But you're always funny doing this.

02:14:45.000 Just remember what you said and repeat it.

02:14:47.000 That's all I do.

02:14:48.000 I tell a story.

02:14:49.000 Like I have different stories.

02:14:50.000 I'm just telling stories and I add stuff to it.

02:14:52.000 But going back to your point about the theater.

02:14:56.000 I'm brand new at this, so I thought everything was the same.

02:14:58.000 And Brian and I went to do the show.

02:15:00.000 It was like 700 people sold out, but it was a giant ballroom.

02:15:04.000 And Brian's like, now, don't get discouraged because you're not going to be able to hear it as well.

02:15:08.000 So I'd do some of my bits.

02:15:10.000 I could kind of hear him laughing, but it was kind of... 0.99

02:15:14.000 I'm like, what the fuck is wrong with these people? 1.00

02:15:16.000 And then when we got to the back, I was like, fuck them, Brian. 1.00

02:15:18.000 He's like, no, man, I told you. 1.00

02:15:20.000 Because I go based off the crowd's reaction.

02:15:22.000 When we get off the stage, I'm like, dude, that was a sick show. 0.94

02:15:24.000 Or, dude, that sucked.

02:15:26.000 And he's like, no, I'm telling you, you're not going to be able to gauge it off this. 1.00

02:15:29.000 Because we've been in small comedy places where I'm like, holy shit, I'm like, fucking Joe Rogan up in this bitch! 1.00

02:15:34.000 And then there's other ones where I'm like, what the fuck is going on with these people? 1.00

02:15:37.000 And he's like, it's the venue we're in. 0.64

02:15:39.000 Well, even Cobbs is kind of interesting, because Cobbs is like 400-something, and the ceiling's rather high because it has a balcony.

02:15:46.000 So the old Cobbs was crazy fun.

02:15:50.000 The old Cobbs was like, I want to say like 150 people max.

02:15:53.000 It was probably less than that.

02:15:55.000 It was really small, and it was tight.

02:15:57.000 And I used to do it, and a lot of people used to do it, and take a loss.

02:16:01.000 We're good to go. 1.00

02:16:21.000 What the fuck are you doing? 1.00

02:16:22.000 You've been thrown into that. 1.00

02:16:23.000 I think it's funny.

02:16:23.000 It doesn't bother me.

02:16:24.000 I'm not going, yeah, I know where you're at, bitch. 1.00

02:16:27.000 And then we had a manager go, you know, you're at the Wilbur, man. 0.99

02:16:31.000 This is months ago.

02:16:32.000 He goes, you know, just let you know where you guys are at.

02:16:34.000 So Rogan sold out four times.

02:16:36.000 I was like... 1.00

02:16:37.000 Why the fuck are you... 1.00

02:16:38.000 Yeah, okay, cool. 1.00

02:16:39.000 And Chris Rock's all at Madison Square Garden. 0.99

02:16:41.000 What's your fucking point? 1.00

02:16:41.000 What the fuck is the point? 1.00

02:16:42.000 What are you trying to hurt my feelings? 1.00

02:16:43.000 Who's saying this to you?

02:16:44.000 It's Joe, this guy, who deals with the Wilbur. 1.00

02:16:47.000 Like, it's the fucking... 0.99

02:16:48.000 It's a giant theater, man. 1.00

02:16:50.000 I'm very aware of what Rogan...

02:16:51.000 Why are you even bringing that up?

02:16:53.000 And LeBron James dunks the basketball better than me. 1.00

02:16:55.000 What's your fucking point? 1.00

02:16:56.000 Listen, bitch, I've done stand-up 34 times. 1.00

02:16:58.000 Yeah, I wish 34. How many times have you done it? 1.00

02:16:58.000 That's it. 1.00

02:17:01.000 Only at live shows.

02:17:02.000 How many live shows have you guys done all together?

02:17:04.000 Probably 10?

02:17:05.000 10?

02:17:06.000 15?

02:17:06.000 That's it?

02:17:07.000 No way!

02:17:08.000 Guess who's going to be doing stand-up at the Wilbur this Friday in Boston?

02:17:13.000 That guy right there.

02:17:14.000 Go on up.

02:17:15.000 It's going to be, I don't know, we're selling a lot of tickets.

02:17:17.000 The Wilbur is one of the best theaters to do stand-up in, because it's a three-tier, and it's shallow, meaning the people are right on top of you.

02:17:24.000 So even though there's more than a thousand people in the room, it feels way more intimate.

02:17:29.000 It seems like a bunch of 300-seaters stacked on top of each other.

02:17:33.000 It seems like the same.

02:17:34.000 I can't wait.

02:17:35.000 Tickets available at tfatk.com.

02:17:37.000 Yeah, you get a feeling like a 300-seat theater, but a roar of a thousand people.

02:17:43.000 I can't It's dope.

02:17:44.000 Because then we're in New York, too, and doing our bit in New York would be crazy, man.

02:17:49.000 Well, I took Tony Hinchcoop with me to Boston, and now he's going to go back and headline that place.

02:17:55.000 He's going to do One Night at the Wilbur in October.

02:17:58.000 There it is right there.

02:17:59.000 See how it's like... 0.97

02:18:00.000 Yeah, that place is sick.

02:18:01.000 Yeah, it's beautiful, and it's been around forever.

02:18:03.000 That's the Wilbur right there?

02:18:04.000 Mm-hmm.

02:18:05.000 But that's a bird's eye view.

02:18:05.000 That's it.

02:18:07.000 You know, it's a distorted view.

02:18:09.000 You see how the lens is.

02:18:11.000 That's gonna be great.

02:18:12.000 My favorite so far has been the Vic in Chicago.

02:18:15.000 The Vic Theater.

02:18:16.000 The Vic?

02:18:16.000 That's what it's called, right?

02:18:17.000 I love the Vic.

02:18:19.000 I think that was a Vic, right?

02:18:21.000 I think the Vic.

02:18:22.000 Chicago was 900 people.

02:18:23.000 It's like an older theater.

02:18:24.000 I'm doing some big-ass place in Chicago in July.

02:18:29.000 I love Chicago.

02:18:31.000 Where's the Chicago Bulls play?

02:18:33.000 I'm doing the Civic Opera House. 1.00

02:18:35.000 Damn. 0.99

02:18:36.000 I'm doing an opera house. 1.00

02:18:37.000 I'm going to sing. 0.99

02:18:38.000 Damn right you are. 0.96

02:18:40.000 Just start it off like that. 0.98

02:18:43.000 Maybe I should hire someone to sing some opera before the show.

02:18:48.000 Can you name one opera song?

02:18:48.000 That'd be sick.

02:18:50.000 Who's the blind guy? 0.61

02:18:51.000 No, but...

02:18:52.000 Jim Jeffries does opera.

02:18:55.000 He used to be an opera singer.

02:18:56.000 What?

02:18:57.000 Yeah.

02:18:57.000 No.

02:18:58.000 The last guy I would have thought of.

02:18:58.000 Yes.

02:18:59.000 Put that photo up.

02:19:00.000 That's a really good photo. 1.00

02:19:01.000 God damn, that's sick. 1.00

02:19:03.000 Wait a minute. 1.00

02:19:04.000 This is the Civic Opera House?

02:19:05.000 Dude, you're doing that?

02:19:06.000 You're going to fill it up, too.

02:19:08.000 It's all gold.

02:19:09.000 Look at that.

02:19:10.000 Looks like that Prince's room.

02:19:12.000 Dude, that should be awesome.

02:19:14.000 That's dope. 0.93

02:19:15.000 That's the Prince of Benai. 1.00

02:19:17.000 That's his room just full of whores. 1.00

02:19:19.000 That's exactly the same design on his underwear. 1.00

02:19:24.000 On his MeUndies.

02:19:25.000 Come on, you know that dude has gold underwear, right?

02:19:27.000 100%.

02:19:27.000 Why wouldn't you?

02:19:28.000 I would.

02:19:28.000 You ran up ideas.

02:19:29.000 I'm saying it right now.

02:19:31.000 If anyone has 24-k gold underwear, send them.

02:19:31.000 I want some.

02:19:34.000 I have camo underwear.

02:19:35.000 Come on, don't be like that.

02:19:36.000 Me too.

02:19:37.000 Usually.

02:19:38.000 Hide them pee-pee stains.

02:19:40.000 Yeah, there you go.

02:19:41.000 Those are MeUndies? 1.00

02:19:42.000 Fuck yeah, that's all I wear. 1.00

02:19:43.000 That's all I wear. 1.00

02:19:45.000 They're the best underwear in the world. 1.00

02:19:46.000 Even if they fucking drop me as a sponsor, I'll tell you, wear those goddamn underwear. 1.00

02:19:50.000 They're fucking comfortable as shit. 1.00

02:19:52.000 You can't have camo on the outside and white on the inside, though. 1.00

02:19:55.000 Is that what you have?

02:19:56.000 I wear MeUndies and I wear 5'4". 0.97

02:20:00.000 They want you to see the damage you're doing to your underwear with your farts. 0.96

02:20:04.000 Hey, man. 0.92

02:20:05.000 Hey, man.

02:20:05.000 Let's go camo on camo.

02:20:07.000 Make a jungle camo at that.

02:20:08.000 Don't send that sand camo.

02:20:10.000 We do reads for MeUndies and he's like, MeUndies, no more light underwear, please.

02:20:13.000 I'm dead serious.

02:20:14.000 I want dark underwear, please.

02:20:15.000 Well, they sent me some cool light ones, too, though, with some interesting designs and prints on them. 0.98

02:20:20.000 All artsy and shit. 0.97

02:20:21.000 They're dope. 0.98

02:20:22.000 What I love about that company and all these companies that are emerging on the internet don't have, like, an actual store.

02:20:28.000 They're just selling things online.

02:20:30.000 Like, they figured out, like, you don't need a place. 0.99

02:20:32.000 Who the fuck wants to go somewhere? 0.99

02:20:34.000 100%. 0.99

02:20:35.000 How easy is it to just order something, have it sent to you, and then how much of a difference is getting things in the mail these days as opposed to going to stores?

02:20:45.000 How much of an impact has that had on actual retail stores?

02:20:48.000 Brilliant.

02:20:48.000 Is there anything better than getting a package at home?

02:20:50.000 It's cheaper.

02:20:50.000 It's also cheaper.

02:20:51.000 This 54club.com, whatever thing, literally, it's like $60 for legit.

02:20:56.000 Everything I'm wearing is from that.

02:20:58.000 How about Club W? Have you done Club W? Great wine.

02:21:00.000 Great wine.

02:21:01.000 Way cheaper.

02:21:02.000 Thirteen bucks for really good wine.

02:21:04.000 So you're right, man.

02:21:06.000 They cut out the...

02:21:07.000 Everything we do, every one of our sponsors, I actually use the products because they're good.

02:21:12.000 Me too.

02:21:12.000 Yeah, me too.

02:21:12.000 I love that.

02:21:13.000 I haven't made a website yet with Squarespace, but I want to.

02:21:16.000 But the other things like Dollar Shave Club, I don't buy razors anymore. 0.99

02:21:19.000 Do you ever use that butter shit? 0.99

02:21:22.000 That Carver's Butter? 1.00

02:21:23.000 Oh my God.

02:21:24.000 It's so nice.

02:21:26.000 We're trying to get the guy who started that company on because he's really funny, who does all the commercials.

02:21:30.000 Oh, Does he?

02:21:30.000 Yeah.

02:21:30.000 That's him, the guy in the commercials?

02:21:31.000 Yeah, he was an improv guy. 1.00

02:21:33.000 Started a fucking company. 0.99

02:21:35.000 They're in Marina, too. 1.00

02:21:36.000 Yeah, we gotta get him on the podcast.

02:21:37.000 He's funny.

02:21:38.000 Well, I just love this time.

02:21:40.000 Because it's really the same thing that's what's going on with podcasts.

02:21:43.000 You guys don't need any sort of a company.

02:21:46.000 You guys kind of have a company, though.

02:21:47.000 You kind of have Fox.

02:21:48.000 I mean, not really.

02:21:50.000 Because, again...

02:21:52.000 They don't tell you what to do, but they tried.

02:21:54.000 Well, they tried when we first started.

02:21:56.000 They've been great.

02:21:57.000 They've actually been so good.

02:21:59.000 That's nice.

02:22:00.000 But they also stay out of our way.

02:22:02.000 They know if they're like, hey, don't do that.

02:22:04.000 I'm like, what?

02:22:05.000 See ya.

02:22:06.000 Do what?

02:22:07.000 That's the thing is, like, you guys have an advantageous position in the relationship.

02:22:11.000 It's not like a regular show where they could fire you from it.

02:22:14.000 If they fire you, you will have zero impact.

02:22:18.000 Zero. 0.99

02:22:19.000 It'd actually help us, because I'll just tell everyone what went down, and I will tell all the fucks dirt, and I will blast pictures. 0.99

02:22:26.000 Oh, someone's a snitch. 0.99

02:22:27.000 I'm a snitch. 1.00

02:22:28.000 I'm the Novitski fucking... 1.00

02:22:30.000 I've always been a snitch. 1.00

02:22:31.000 Oh, no!

02:22:32.000 Yeah, I'm that golden snitch.

02:22:34.000 The truth comes out.

02:22:35.000 The truth comes out.

02:22:36.000 Golden Snitch! 0.99

02:22:38.000 How long before someone fucking makes a photoshop of you in the Salt New Brunei's outfit that just says Golden Snitch? 0.99

02:22:44.000 The Golden Snitch! 0.98

02:22:44.000 That photoshopped Steve guy is gonna be on that, man. 0.98

02:22:47.000 It's happening right now.

02:22:47.000 It's happening.

02:22:48.000 That guy is sweating right now and fucking putting it all together. 0.99

02:22:52.000 No more Keto Kid, just the Golden Snitch. 1.00

02:22:56.000 That fucking Salt New Brunei picture was the perfect picture for you. 1.00

02:22:59.000 Just put your head on his little body. 1.00

02:23:01.000 That little body.

02:23:02.000 Oh my god.

02:23:03.000 The golden snitch.

02:23:04.000 He is a little snitch.

02:23:05.000 And they do it in the same picture that they use for the golden child.

02:23:10.000 They use the cover, the same font and everything.

02:23:12.000 The golden snitch.

02:23:13.000 The Eddie Murphy movie.

02:23:14.000 So funny, man.

02:23:16.000 I forgot about that movie.

02:23:17.000 Yeah, me too.

02:23:18.000 Arsenio Hall, back in the day. 0.99

02:23:20.000 Fucking Arsenio Hall. 0.98

02:23:21.000 That was a good movie back in the day. 0.99

02:23:22.000 That was when Eddie Murphy was in his heyday.

02:23:23.000 Dude, they tried bringing Arsenio Hall back.

02:23:26.000 His same show where he goes, who, who, who?

02:23:28.000 2016. Bitch, get the fuck out of here. 1.00

02:23:30.000 That didn't work. 1.00

02:23:31.000 Well, it was also the real problem with that not working.

02:23:35.000 There was a bunch of different problems.

02:23:36.000 They tried to do the same show.

02:23:37.000 The exact same.

02:23:38.000 He's even dressed the same. 0.99

02:23:39.000 Doing the same bits and shit. 0.99

02:23:40.000 And he looks the same. 0.99

02:23:42.000 Same haircut.

02:23:43.000 Sweater.

02:23:44.000 Doing some stand-up.

02:23:44.000 He's a real nice guy.

02:23:46.000 I can't say a bad word about that guy ever.

02:23:48.000 Arsenio Hall is a real nice guy.

02:23:50.000 Why doesn't Eddie Murphy do stand-up anymore?

02:23:52.000 I thought he was going to start trying to do it.

02:23:53.000 You know what, man?

02:23:54.000 Eddie Murphy has that tranny stuff. 1.00

02:23:56.000 The transgender prostitute stuff hanging over his head, I'm sure. 1.00

02:24:00.000 So he's afraid people will call him out. 1.00

02:24:01.000 That shit would be funny. 0.99

02:24:02.000 Dude, when I was with Charlie, people called Charlie out on it. 1.00

02:24:05.000 They were yelling out to Charlie.

02:24:07.000 Have you seen Eddie's Girl?

02:24:09.000 Yeah, I'm sure.

02:24:10.000 Look, I... Talk about the golden. 0.99

02:24:12.000 He's goddamn Eddie Murphy. 0.99

02:24:13.000 But here's the thing. 0.99

02:24:14.000 He did an awards show recently and he like went up and talked about Cosby and did material about Cosby and it was fucking great. 0.98

02:24:26.000 Wow. 0.94

02:24:26.000 It wasn't just great. 0.94

02:24:27.000 His timing was great.

02:24:29.000 He's amazing.

02:24:30.000 His delivery was great.

02:24:31.000 Can we see it?

02:24:32.000 Yeah, yeah, yeah.

02:24:32.000 It's online.

02:24:33.000 See, Jamie will try to find it. 0.99

02:24:35.000 It's so good that it makes you go, whoa, if this guy was doing stand-up, he would be fucking murdering it right now. 0.97

02:24:41.000 Do you think he just doesn't care anymore? 0.99

02:24:44.000 He's absolutely so rich and absolutely so busy, and he likes doing movies, and when he does movies, he's in a lot of ways, he's like sheltered from all these people that would fuck with him. 0.95

02:24:53.000 He hasn't done a movie in a while, though. 0.94

02:24:56.000 For sure make Nutty Professor 4. I don't know what he's done in a while.

02:24:59.000 I haven't really been paying attention, but the amount of money that Eddie Murphy's made from all those movies that he did.

02:25:05.000 From Shrek as the donkey.

02:25:06.000 Oh, that's right.

02:25:07.000 He made them a billion dollars.

02:25:07.000 Shrek's probably the last thing he did.

02:25:09.000 He lives like a sultan. 0.75

02:25:11.000 I mean, there's animators and there's a lot of story writing.

02:25:15.000 Other people could have done that, too.

02:25:17.000 It's not like it was impossible to do without Eddie Murphy.

02:25:19.000 But what he has accomplished...

02:25:22.000 I mean, financially, it's probably staggering.

02:25:25.000 The Beverly Hills cops?

02:25:25.000 Insane.

02:25:26.000 I could see him not wanting to grind.

02:25:29.000 Not wanting to go out there.

02:25:29.000 Right.

02:25:30.000 When you live like the Sultan of Brunei, to bring it back full circle.

02:25:33.000 I wonder if it does.

02:25:34.000 I don't know if it does.

02:25:35.000 Or like Dan Bilzerian.

02:25:36.000 I'll tell you what, though.

02:25:37.000 I met him in Hawaii. 0.99

02:25:37.000 He was nice as fuck. 0.99

02:25:39.000 Eddie was? 0.99

02:25:39.000 He was really cool. 0.99

02:25:40.000 Yeah.

02:25:40.000 He was real friendly.

02:25:41.000 Yeah.

02:25:41.000 Real nice.

02:25:42.000 Yeah, there it is.

02:25:43.000 Hold on a second.

02:25:44.000 Go from the beginning. 0.99

02:25:45.000 Damn, he's aged great. 0.99

02:25:46.000 Yeah, give us some volume. 0.99

02:25:47.000 He really has.

02:25:48.000 Black people don't age, really, don't they? 0.98

02:25:50.000 Well, he's in his 50s. 0.95

02:25:52.000 What happened?

02:25:52.000 What'd you do?

02:25:54.000 What's that?

02:25:56.000 He said Bill has what?

02:26:00.000 No, because I know there was a big outcry from people.

02:26:02.000 It was trying to get Bill to give his trophies back.

02:26:05.000 You know you f***ed up when they want you to give your trophies back.

02:26:14.000 You want to give his trophy back, too? 0.98

02:26:16.000 He should do one show where he just come out and just talk crazy now.

02:26:21.000 I would like to talk to some of the people who feel that I should give back my jobies!

02:26:41.000 Is that it?

02:26:42.000 He's so good at...

02:26:43.000 I think he did more than that.

02:26:44.000 That was edited and censored a little bit.

02:26:45.000 Yeah, obviously. 0.99

02:26:46.000 Damn, look at all those Dave Chappelle's. 0.99

02:26:48.000 Oh, this is just a story piece. 0.99

02:26:50.000 Murphy makes Cosby jokes at award ceremony.

02:26:52.000 They didn't want to do the whole thing.

02:26:54.000 Anyway, you guys can find it, I'm sure.

02:26:56.000 What was the name of the award?

02:26:58.000 It was from the Mark Twain Awards from earlier this year. 0.89

02:27:00.000 I'm telling you, man, just looking at that thing right there, when you're talking about a guy who hasn't done stand-up in forever, and he just goes up there and murders it like that, and is in perfect form, his timing's perfect, he's a fucking fantastic stand-up. 0.87

02:27:13.000 Such a talent, huh? 0.92

02:27:15.000 Amazing.

02:27:16.000 Unbelievable.

02:27:16.000 Dave Chappelle's making a crazy run, too, again now, huh?

02:27:19.000 I see him all the time.

02:27:19.000 I see you on your Instagram.

02:27:21.000 Yeah, we hang out at the Comedy Store all the time.

02:27:22.000 He's your boy.

02:27:23.000 He's always there.

02:27:23.000 Yeah, he took me to some Eyes Wide Shut party in the middle of the Hollywood Hills.

02:27:27.000 What?

02:27:27.000 You had to get in an elevator and go to the top of this hill.

02:27:30.000 What?

02:27:30.000 Yeah, it was Naomi Campbell had this birthday party.

02:27:33.000 And so Dave's like, hey, Joe, you want to go with me to this party?

02:27:37.000 And I'm like, dude, I don't like going to those parties.

02:27:40.000 I like avoiding celebrity things.

02:27:41.000 Like, oh, come on, man.

02:27:43.000 I gotta be back here by midnight anyway.

02:27:45.000 And I go, alright, so we're smoking crazy amounts of weed.

02:27:49.000 We get in my Porsche.

02:27:53.000 Go up to the top of this hill.

02:27:55.000 Get even more baked.

02:27:57.000 Get in a shuttle.

02:27:59.000 It takes you up to this dude's house, and some dude who has the sickest house at the top of the Hollywood Hill.

02:28:06.000 It's just some crazy billionaire character who has a sick house, and then above his sick house, he has a sick party house.

02:28:14.000 He has just a party house.

02:28:16.000 So you go to the top of this house, and he has this... 0.88

02:28:19.000 Fucking insane view of the city where it looks like Blade Runner, you know, and he's got just 180 degrees of windows.

02:28:27.000 His party house is like a flying saucer that just got stuck in the side of a building, but the whole outside edge of the flying saucer is all windows. 0.94

02:28:37.000 So you're sitting, there's all seats around the windows, and then he has this big bar, and I mean, the guy's just...

02:28:42.000 Because it's all loaded.

02:28:44.000 Scrooge McDuck.

02:28:45.000 And we have to take an elevator, like a four-person elevator, an open-air elevator that goes up the side of the hill.

02:28:51.000 And as we're going up the side of the hill, Naomi Campbell's naked photo is 40, 50 feet tall.

02:28:56.000 And I'm not kidding.

02:28:57.000 I'm not exaggerating.

02:28:58.000 It's this enormous naked photo of Naomi Campbell. 0.98

02:29:02.000 And then we get up to the top, and it's like fucking Demi Moore's there, and I'm... 0.98

02:29:05.000 Saying hi to Lenny Kravitz. 0.96

02:29:06.000 I'm like, this is so strange.

02:29:08.000 It's so high.

02:29:09.000 Plus, barbecued.

02:29:11.000 So high.

02:29:13.000 Barbecued.

02:29:13.000 So, so high.

02:29:14.000 I shouldn't be out in public. 0.99

02:29:15.000 And up there with all these fucking super rich people in them. 0.99

02:29:20.000 I'm like, what's up, Lenny? 0.98

02:29:21.000 Hey, what's up, man?

02:29:22.000 How you doing?

02:29:22.000 We're talking to Lenny Kravitz.

02:29:24.000 Like, how bizarre is this?

02:29:25.000 Yeah, cool dude.

02:29:26.000 Yeah, he seems real nice.

02:29:27.000 But it was all these, I was talking to all these musician dudes about MMA. It was like, I got cornered by all these musician dudes who started throwing that.

02:29:35.000 Oh my God, man.

02:29:36.000 Dude, people get so excited.

02:29:38.000 They get so excited.

02:29:39.000 They want to start talking MMA. They got a guy who knows.

02:29:42.000 Yeah, meanwhile, I'm like, anything to relax my anxiety right now. 0.99

02:29:45.000 I'll tell you all the shit I know. 0.99

02:29:47.000 I'll break down whatever the fuck you want. 1.00

02:29:49.000 Give me two fighters. 0.99

02:29:50.000 Go.

02:29:51.000 You want to know who's going to win?

02:29:53.000 How do people make that much money?

02:29:54.000 2017 schedule?

02:29:55.000 Here's the weirdest part about it.

02:29:57.000 There was one point in the night, Noemi Campbell was for a book that she has.

02:30:00.000 She has a book coming out.

02:30:02.000 She's very nice too, by the way.

02:30:03.000 Super nice and beautiful.

02:30:05.000 Still a dime piece?

02:30:06.000 100%.

02:30:07.000 I don't know how old she is.

02:30:08.000 She's gotta be 40, right?

02:30:10.000 I would imagine she's probably closer to 50. Really?

02:30:15.000 Cindy Crawford is 50 now.

02:30:18.000 I think she's 49. I think she's a little older than that.

02:30:23.000 Naomi Campbell's 45. How old is Cindy Crawford? 0.97

02:30:26.000 She's 45. I think she just turned 50. Ridiculously looking.

02:30:32.000 Ridiculously looking. 1.00

02:30:32.000 She is ridiculous. 1.00

02:30:33.000 So, Noemi Camel, 45, still fucking slamming hot, right? 1.00

02:30:37.000 So anyway, she stops in the middle of this thing. 0.96

02:30:39.000 They have these photos of her.

02:30:41.000 Her book is out, and it's this exclusive book that costs like $1,500 or something.

02:30:46.000 Don't charge that much.

02:30:47.000 Really big, high, glossy, the whole deal.

02:30:49.000 Yeah, don't do that.

02:30:50.000 And she just stops, and they start taking photos of her, and she just starts posing.

02:30:54.000 So no one talks.

02:30:55.000 No one's talking.

02:30:56.000 Everyone's just watching.

02:30:57.000 They're just watching her do this.

02:30:57.000 Because it's a Naomi Campbell party.

02:30:58.000 So it's almost like Michael Bolton gets out at his party and starts, When I'm here!

02:31:02.000 Oh, I'd love that.

02:31:03.000 Love's a woman!

02:31:05.000 I'd take it on my cell phone.

02:31:06.000 Go, boy! 0.89

02:31:07.000 But it's like that.

02:31:08.000 She's doing her thing.

02:31:09.000 Her craft.

02:31:10.000 She's posing.

02:31:10.000 Her craft.

02:31:11.000 That's how a supermodel does it. 1.00

02:31:12.000 Amazing.

02:31:13.000 Oh, get it, girl.

02:31:14.000 You know, and there's just...

02:31:15.000 It was kind of a fascinating little party. 0.98

02:31:17.000 It was a good thing to dip my toe into and get the fuck out of there as quickly as possible. 0.91

02:31:21.000 And realize why you don't go to those. 0.96

02:31:22.000 Yeah, well, it's just...

02:31:23.000 They're too famous.

02:31:24.000 They're too famous.

02:31:25.000 And what it is, to me, it's like, ooh, don't get that famous.

02:31:29.000 For sure, back off.

02:31:30.000 Because you're going to get weird.

02:31:31.000 Well, everybody gets weird.

02:31:33.000 They're weird people, and they have to hang out with each other.

02:31:35.000 Because nobody else is going to understand.

02:31:37.000 And I was talking to Dave about that.

02:31:39.000 I go, do you like hanging out with celebrities because they're the only people that understand what your life is like?

02:31:44.000 He's like, oh man, but I'm not as famous as them.

02:31:46.000 I go, hit the brakes.

02:31:48.000 I go, that's part of your problem. 1.00

02:31:49.000 You don't understand how fucking famous you are. 0.98

02:31:52.000 You're one of the most famous comedians that's ever lived and one of the most famous celebrities in America. 0.99

02:31:57.000 Like if there's a 100 list of the most famous people in America, Dave Chappelle's on that list.

02:32:02.000 I'm not on that list.

02:32:03.000 I like to stay on the outskirts of that list.

02:32:04.000 I like to be in the suburbs of that list.

02:32:06.000 I don't know, Joe.

02:32:07.000 I don't like being on that list.

02:32:08.000 I think you're in that list.

02:32:09.000 I'm definitely not.

02:32:10.000 You're definitely closing in.

02:32:15.000 You're closing in on it.

02:32:17.000 You ain't quitting.

02:32:17.000 I'm slowing out.

02:32:18.000 I'm slowing down.

02:32:20.000 I'm thinking about moving to Yosemite. 1.00

02:32:22.000 Don't do that bullshit! 1.00

02:32:25.000 You've always flirted with moving out of LA. Oh yeah, absolutely. 1.00

02:32:30.000 Where would you live right now if I gave you one other alternative?

02:32:32.000 There's a few different possibilities.

02:32:34.000 I really like Colorado.

02:32:36.000 I've always liked Colorado.

02:32:37.000 Colorado is always going to be one of my best choices.

02:32:39.000 You've been there, though.

02:32:40.000 I like the people.

02:32:41.000 I like the environment.

02:32:42.000 I like the vibe.

02:32:43.000 I like the stand-up community.

02:32:45.000 I like the Comedy Works, and I love Wendy, the owner of the Comedy Works.

02:32:49.000 That's the spot.

02:32:50.000 That's the spot where I could live.

02:32:51.000 I could live in Seattle.

02:32:52.000 I just couldn't deal with the winter. 1.00

02:32:53.000 I just think it's stupid. 0.99

02:32:56.000 There's no need to do it. 1.00

02:32:57.000 Folks, it rains too much up there.

02:32:59.000 Your summers are of the gods, and I get it that it makes you appreciate one when you don't have the other, but it's hard to know that all I can do is get on a jet and I can be in LA and it's perfect.

02:33:11.000 Yeah.

02:33:12.000 The problem in LA right now is that it's really good.

02:33:16.000 Like, comedy-wise, it's never been better.

02:33:19.000 Like, there's more clubs, there's more comics, there's more inspiration, there's more fun.

02:33:23.000 Me and Stan Hope and Ron White were hanging out at the Comedy Store the other night, drinking and laughing and having fun, and I'm like, where else can this take place?

02:33:32.000 It's like, it's so rare that you'll go there and, like, a guy like Ron White drops in to do 15 minutes.

02:33:37.000 I mean, that's really what it is.

02:33:39.000 And on the list, do 15 minutes.

02:33:41.000 Burr comes by.

02:33:42.000 All these people are all hanging.

02:33:43.000 Don't you think if you moved to Denver, your podcast would suffer?

02:33:46.000 Because you're not going to have as many big guests?

02:33:48.000 Maybe.

02:33:49.000 I don't know.

02:33:50.000 I could always find out.

02:33:51.000 Who doesn't care?

02:33:52.000 I could always fly in like once a week and do it.

02:33:56.000 That would get tired.

02:33:57.000 Every week you're gonna fly someone in.

02:33:58.000 Well, no, no, no.

02:33:59.000 Well, I could definitely fly someone there if they were willing to go.

02:34:03.000 I could look for like local people, but that would run dry.

02:34:06.000 Very fast in Denver.

02:34:09.000 There's no better spot than L.A. to do podcasts or any of that.

02:34:09.000 Yeah.

02:34:15.000 And stand-up.

02:34:16.000 You can't find better.

02:34:17.000 But there's also the vast numbers of human beings that live in this place.

02:34:23.000 Yeah.

02:34:24.000 Look at the numbers with Denver. 1.00

02:34:24.000 Shit. 1.00

02:34:25.000 It's not the same as here, but how many people are moving there a month? 1.00

02:34:28.000 It's insane.

02:34:28.000 I wouldn't live in Denver.

02:34:29.000 Oh, you'd live back in the boondocks.

02:34:30.000 I'd live in like Evergreen.

02:34:31.000 I like Evergreen.

02:34:34.000 Broomfield's nice.

02:34:35.000 Yeah, Broomfield's nice, but Evergreen's in the mountains.

02:34:37.000 That's what I like.

02:34:38.000 There's some views in Evergreen or Boulder.

02:34:39.000 I like Boulder a lot.

02:34:41.000 The Boulder thing is a one-note thing.

02:34:44.000 Everybody's so liberal.

02:34:46.000 They're so left-wing.

02:34:48.000 I like a little mixture.

02:34:50.000 They're too soft in Boulder for me.

02:34:52.000 Sophomore what? 1.00

02:34:53.000 Just bitches. 1.00

02:34:55.000 Just. 1.00

02:34:55.000 Oh. 1.00

02:34:56.000 I remember I went to school. 1.00

02:34:57.000 Just bitches. 1.00

02:34:57.000 I lived there. 1.00

02:34:58.000 How so?

02:34:59.000 How so?

02:35:00.000 There's just, A, there's no diversity.

02:35:03.000 It's just all white, rich white people.

02:35:05.000 Just everyone's rich or your college kid.

02:35:06.000 Super liberal, rich white people? 0.68

02:35:07.000 If you see a black guy, he plays football. 0.89

02:35:09.000 Other than that, their lives, they live in this Pleasantville, this little weird bubble community.

02:35:13.000 Weird bubble.

02:35:14.000 Yeah.

02:35:14.000 Weird.

02:35:15.000 Super nice people.

02:35:15.000 But.

02:35:16.000 Yeah, they're nice.

02:35:17.000 It's easy to be nice when you've got plenty of food and no threats, right?

02:35:17.000 Educated.

02:35:20.000 Yeah.

02:35:21.000 The Golden Snitch!

02:35:24.000 Somebody made it already.

02:35:25.000 Did you make it?

02:35:26.000 Jamie made it!

02:35:27.000 Jamie made it while working on the show.

02:35:29.000 Jamie, you're a genius.

02:35:30.000 Incredible.

02:35:31.000 The Golden Snitch.

02:35:32.000 That might be a young job.

02:35:33.000 Jamie, please text me that immediately.

02:35:36.000 That must go on the Instagram page.

02:35:39.000 The Golden Snitch.

02:35:41.000 That's Ultimate Fighter's shopface.

02:35:43.000 That's perfect.

02:35:45.000 I don't know, man.

02:35:46.000 Those two spots are big candidates.

02:35:49.000 Please don't leave L.A. Well, I'm thinking about spending time in more than one place.

02:35:54.000 Right.

02:35:55.000 The only thing that holds me back, really, and it's not really holding me back, but having a family, you have to take them into consideration when you make any move.

02:36:03.000 You can't be bouncing them around.

02:36:04.000 Kids don't like that.

02:36:05.000 Stability, son.

02:36:06.000 That's how I grew up.

02:36:07.000 They might turn to me.

02:36:08.000 Yeah.

02:36:09.000 But I'll tell you one thing, when they turn 18, if they decide to go to college somewhere and move somewhere else, I'm a ghost.

02:36:17.000 There's no way I'm going to be doing this in 10 years.

02:36:20.000 There's no way I'm going to...

02:36:21.000 Because I don't think this city is sustainable.

02:36:23.000 I think this city is like a game of musical chairs.

02:36:25.000 And I think after a while, you're like, it's going to be Mexico City.

02:36:28.000 I've been to Mexico City.

02:36:29.000 I know what it's like.

02:36:30.000 It's overwhelming.

02:36:31.000 The amount of people, like the traffic jams are insane.

02:36:35.000 Like you go through them and you're like, how is this real? 0.90

02:36:37.000 Nobody gives a fuck about a red light or a green light. 0.75

02:36:40.000 And when they want to merge, they just have to jut themselves out into traffic. 0.92

02:36:44.000 Nobody lets you in.

02:36:45.000 And I remember sitting there, thinking there, watching this, going, here's this beautiful city, this crazy ancient city in the mountains in Mexico, like 7,000 feet above sea level, you know, just with 20-plus million people stuffed in it.

02:36:58.000 And, like, LA's not that far off.

02:37:00.000 And LA's growth from the time I moved here in 1994 to today in 2016 is unbelievable.

02:37:07.000 22 years later.

02:37:08.000 Property values are so exciting.

02:37:09.000 I know, but that's going to happen here.

02:37:11.000 You think it's just going to keep going?

02:37:12.000 Keep going, keep going.

02:37:13.000 What's going to happen?

02:37:14.000 People are going to wise up and become awesome?

02:37:15.000 No, they're going to keep moving here because this is where show business is.

02:37:19.000 See, I'm trying to convince my dad to move here, especially because his grandson's here.

02:37:22.000 And so he doesn't see him.

02:37:23.000 I'm like, Dad, move, man.

02:37:25.000 It's different, though.

02:37:25.000 What?

02:37:26.000 I mean, that makes sense, you know, to live here with, you know, you're here, your business is here, your family's here.

02:37:33.000 I think people will move, though.

02:37:33.000 That makes sense.

02:37:34.000 The thing is, it's so expensive to live here.

02:37:36.000 Taxes ain't funny.

02:37:37.000 Like anything else, what happens is people go, you know what, LA's great, but you know there's this place, Raleigh, North Carolina, they're really doing the building infrastructure, and people move to those places.

02:37:45.000 Nashville, Raleigh, you know, look what happened to Portland.

02:37:48.000 That secret got out, people moved there, so...

02:37:51.000 Yeah, but the secret's out.

02:37:52.000 That's true. 0.96

02:37:52.000 The winter sucks. 0.96

02:37:53.000 But as you get, like, one of the things I notice is, like, I'll be in places, like that place we were in in Oklahoma slash Arkansas, in the middle of nowhere, this tiny little beautiful town. 0.97

02:38:02.000 We found the best coffee shop with the best single source, single origin, shade-grown coffee, you know, designer fucking coffee worthy of Keith Jardine. 0.97

02:38:10.000 This is the kind of shit that he gets I'm not moving there though, 0.99

02:38:26.000 B. But here's the thing. 1.00

02:38:28.000 There's great places everywhere.

02:38:29.000 Small towns are not small towns from 20 years ago.

02:38:32.000 The internet is here and people are evolving and changing everywhere.

02:38:35.000 It's a different world.

02:38:36.000 You can find a lot of what you like from big cities in small towns now more and more.

02:38:40.000 More and more.

02:38:41.000 And I think that it's important to note that the only reason to be in L.A., it's kind of retro, to have all these people jammed in together.

02:38:49.000 The idea is that this is where the cool people are.

02:38:51.000 This is where we have to live.

02:38:52.000 This is where show business is.

02:38:53.000 But what kind of show business are you really involved in anymore, other than the Goldbergs?

02:38:56.000 Exactly.

02:38:57.000 I guess that's the last traditional thing.

02:38:58.000 No, but you're right about that, too.

02:38:59.000 And a lot of stuff doesn't shoot in L.A. But you don't want to shoot anyway.

02:39:03.000 Your stuff that you're doing, most of it is you doing stand-up on the road, or you're doing your podcast on the road, or you're doing your podcast in town.

02:39:09.000 Unless you're doing auditions.

02:39:11.000 I told you the story about me turning that thing down before the show.

02:39:15.000 I'm not doing it.

02:39:16.000 That's a gangster.

02:39:16.000 I'm not interested.

02:39:17.000 It's not as fun.

02:39:18.000 There's only so much time.

02:39:19.000 I want to bullhunt.

02:39:22.000 I want to get my own food in the mountains.

02:39:24.000 I don't want to do any of that. 0.97

02:39:25.000 Dude, shoot elk. 0.98

02:39:25.000 I want to act. 0.98

02:39:27.000 I want to hear elk go fuck hunting. 1.00

02:39:30.000 He's only waiting behind a tree. 1.00

02:39:31.000 He wants to act. 1.00

02:39:32.000 Fuck hunting. 1.00

02:39:33.000 Yeah, you say that until you do it. 1.00

02:39:34.000 Let me tell you something right now.

02:39:36.000 I take you bow and arrow hunting, son.

02:39:38.000 You get addicted to archery, I'll take you hunting. 0.98

02:39:40.000 You realize the rush of taking out an elk and then eating it and then realizing all the guilt and weird shit that you have about food, about buying it from a grocery store. 0.97

02:39:49.000 You can cut out most of that. 0.97

02:39:50.000 Everything except restaurants.

02:39:52.000 I've cut it out.

02:39:53.000 When I'm eating meat, it's all this...

02:39:54.000 It's exciting.

02:39:57.000 You tell me when.

02:39:57.000 It's a challenge.

02:39:59.000 Nah, you're I'm in.

02:40:00.000 I wish it was a dangerous animal.

02:40:03.000 You do? 1.00

02:40:05.000 First of all, elk will fuck you up. 1.00

02:40:08.000 Are you out of your mind? 1.00

02:40:10.000 You'll go outside and look at that forest horse that I got sitting out there.

02:40:13.000 They would run from this, brother.

02:40:15.000 They might.

02:40:16.000 Sweetie.

02:40:16.000 Me with an arrow?

02:40:17.000 He's not going to be like, what's up, bro?

02:40:18.000 First of all, he has to know that it's an arrow. 1.00

02:40:21.000 An elk might run, a moose might run at you, motherfucker. 1.00

02:40:24.000 That's a big problem with shooting a moose with a bow and arrow. 1.00

02:40:27.000 A moose?

02:40:27.000 I said an elk, son.

02:40:28.000 I'm scared of a moose.

02:40:29.000 They're pretty close in size. 0.99

02:40:32.000 Mooses fuck people up. 0.99

02:40:34.000 Elk fuck people up, too. 0.99

02:40:36.000 I'm going to have to watch some videos if we're going to go. 0.99

02:40:38.000 I need to get more scared. 0.99

02:40:40.000 I need some videos of elk fucking humans up. 0.99

02:40:43.000 Most likely, they won't. 0.98

02:40:44.000 Moose are more aggressive, because moose are traditionally in climates that deal with a lot more grizzly bear, too.

02:40:49.000 Yeah, but dude, see, now, if you're talking about- Yeah, son.

02:40:52.000 The one animal that scares the shit out of me- There's an elk.

02:40:52.000 And wolves.

02:40:55.000 Oh my god. 0.78

02:40:55.000 There's an elk fucking up some snowmen. 0.78

02:40:57.000 That's a snow- You know what I do with that fucking thing? 0.99

02:40:59.000 But dude, look at the size of that thing. 0.99

02:41:01.000 Do you understand how big that is?

02:41:03.000 That's a thousand pound animal.

02:41:05.000 With giant swords growing out of its head. 0.97

02:41:07.000 I need a machine gun, bro. 0.97

02:41:08.000 Here's what terrifies me. 0.98

02:41:09.000 I didn't realize that grizzly bears start eating you before you die. 1.00

02:41:13.000 Ass first. 1.00

02:41:14.000 They start eating your ass. 1.00

02:41:15.000 Well, they don't kill you. 1.00

02:41:16.000 They just eat you. 0.92

02:41:17.000 You eventually die. 0.89

02:41:19.000 That's what I was going to say. 0.99

02:41:20.000 I was listening to your show.

02:41:22.000 I've always been scared of horses.

02:41:23.000 Even more now.

02:41:24.000 I was listening to your show.

02:41:25.000 I'm like, Mr. Hands, I gotta look this up.

02:41:27.000 I went to that dark web.

02:41:28.000 Found that Mr. Hands video.

02:41:30.000 Him... 1.00

02:41:31.000 Mr. Han's a guy who likes to have sex with horses. 1.00

02:41:31.000 What's that? 1.00

02:41:34.000 Well, this horse was just a little too balls deep in that asshole. 1.00

02:41:38.000 He killed him. 1.00

02:41:39.000 You don't know about this?

02:41:41.000 You talk about it on stage.

02:41:42.000 It's a great bit.

02:41:43.000 I stopped doing it.

02:41:44.000 Oh, I'm sorry.

02:41:45.000 I didn't know.

02:41:45.000 No, no, no.

02:41:46.000 I mean, a bit on stage.

02:41:47.000 Dude, Mr. Hands is a guy.

02:41:49.000 He would go into this place.

02:41:50.000 I did all this research. 0.99

02:41:51.000 I'm fucking weird. 0.98

02:41:52.000 But it's obviously a three-man mission. 0.99

02:41:54.000 Because the cameraman, the guy controlling that big old dick wiener, that big old horse wiener, and then Mr. Hands is like this. 0.98

02:42:01.000 And so they just line that horse up. 1.00

02:42:04.000 He puts his hooves on, and then they line that dick into the asshole. 1.00

02:42:08.000 Well, this horse was like, boom, son! 1.00

02:42:11.000 They haven't set up.

02:42:11.000 Where the guy's bending over.

02:42:13.000 It looks like bales of hay or something like that.

02:42:15.000 Or some sort of a platform that they've designed so the guy can bend over. 0.99

02:42:19.000 And then the guy puts his asshole out and they lift the horse's legs up so his feet are on the platform and the hay is hard on. 0.99

02:42:26.000 They probably jerked the horse off first. 1.00

02:42:27.000 He came in about two seconds.

02:42:29.000 That's how animals do it. 1.00

02:42:31.000 Animals don't fuck like Lexington Steel. 1.00

02:42:31.000 Like, kadoosh! 1.00

02:42:34.000 No, no, but this was like...

02:42:36.000 And the guy died?

02:42:36.000 No, this was like, boom, boom.

02:42:39.000 Yeah, and the noises.

02:42:39.000 Kadoosh!

02:42:40.000 We played the noises.

02:42:41.000 We played in the Josh Zeps podcast.

02:42:43.000 We played the noises that he makes.

02:42:45.000 It's like...

02:42:46.000 But he's kind of like me.

02:42:48.000 He's like...

02:42:50.000 He doesn't die there, though.

02:42:52.000 He doesn't die there.

02:42:53.000 He died at the hospital.

02:42:54.000 At the hospital, his friends are like, you gotta go to the hospital.

02:42:56.000 He's like, no, I'm fine, because he works for Boeing.

02:42:58.000 He's like, I'm not going.

02:42:59.000 Here's the thing, though. 0.97

02:43:00.000 They don't know if that video is of the time that killed him, because apparently there's hundreds of hours of videos of those guys getting fucked by horses. 0.97

02:43:09.000 Hundreds of hours. 0.97

02:43:11.000 Now, my thing is...

02:43:13.000 What the government should do is, there's no sense in holding onto that and not making a profit off of those hundreds of hours.

02:43:19.000 They should take that, make a DVD, put it up for sale, and, you know, put the money back into the coffers of the city.

02:43:25.000 I agree.

02:43:26.000 Make some money.

02:43:26.000 Eat them, claw.

02:43:27.000 I'd kind of check it out. 0.99

02:43:29.000 It's interesting to see, because this horse's dick, it looks like this mic. 0.97

02:43:33.000 It's literally this size. 0.99

02:43:34.000 It's like your arm, and I'm not kidding.

02:43:36.000 And it goes, he goes balls deep. 1.00

02:43:38.000 This horse's ball, it goes through his fucking... 1.00

02:43:41.000 Yeah, it just rips him apart. 1.00

02:43:43.000 It tore his colon open.

02:43:44.000 What'd you think was gonna happen?

02:43:45.000 Well, apparently he'd done it a bunch of times and survived.

02:43:49.000 I don't know, man.

02:43:50.000 Yeah, or done it with other animals, and then maybe the horse is what broke him.

02:43:53.000 Maybe he tried to die.

02:43:54.000 Put a safety ring on that bad boy.

02:43:55.000 Put a safety ring.

02:43:56.000 Well, the guy tries to hold onto it for a second.

02:43:58.000 Whose idea is that?

02:43:59.000 He tries to, like, you know, like a high school girl, when they first learn how to get BJ's, they hold onto it, they have, like, a little stopper? 0.86

02:44:05.000 Yeah.

02:44:06.000 Yeah, that horse is not buying that at all.

02:44:08.000 The horse said, just the tip?

02:44:09.000 He's like, dirt.

02:44:09.000 Nah.

02:44:10.000 Nah.

02:44:11.000 You gotta put an inflatable safety ring on that bad boy. 1.00

02:44:13.000 That ain't gonna stop that fucking mammal. 0.99

02:44:16.000 It's just weird. 0.99

02:44:17.000 It's weird because they've met online in a forum where people are turned on by animals.

02:44:24.000 They met on this forum and then decided to meet in this place that was legal.

02:44:24.000 Yeah.

02:44:30.000 In Washington State it was legal until recently.

02:44:32.000 As long as the animal's penetrating you. 1.00

02:44:34.000 If you're penetrating that animal, that shit's illegal, son. 1.00

02:44:37.000 Like, you can't fuck a horse, but it can fuck you. 1.00

02:44:40.000 The rules have changed since Mr. Hand died. 1.00

02:44:42.000 I guess that makes sense.

02:44:43.000 That's like that guy, Jonathan.

02:44:45.000 I'm so balls deep in it. 0.98

02:44:46.000 As soon as I listened to that, I was on the plane just researching the shit out of it. 0.80

02:44:49.000 But there's this guy, Jonathan Haidt, who's a social scientist, talking about that. 0.92

02:44:52.000 Certain things are legal, but they elicit a disgust response, even though they don't hurt anybody.

02:44:58.000 So he does this example of two things where he goes, if a brother and sister are in the woods having sex with a condom on...

02:45:07.000 There's nothing inherently harmful to both of them, but all of us go, ooh. 0.99

02:45:11.000 Or if a guy jerks off, or if a guy fucks a chicken then eats it, we all go, god damn, but it's not really, the chicken's already dead, and it elicits a disgust reaction, even though technically you can't really define why it's wrong. 1.00

02:45:27.000 Well, you said I had to bet that bit about it, about why is it okay to kill something but you can't fuck it after you kill it? 1.00

02:45:33.000 You can't do that, but if you jerked off with a chicken cutlet, I bet you wouldn't go to jail. 1.00

02:45:36.000 If somebody caught you fucking a chicken, people would be really mad. 1.00

02:45:41.000 But if you just took the breast, the chicken breast, wrapped it around your dick and jerked off, no one could say shit. 1.00

02:45:46.000 Right, but we still have this automatic disgust. 1.00

02:45:49.000 Especially if you're into ground beef. 1.00

02:45:51.000 If you take ground beef and you just take raw ground beef and you warm it up to body temperature in a plastic Ziploc bag, wrap it around your dick, and just start jerking yourself with this warm beef. 0.99

02:46:03.000 It's not a terrible idea. 1.00

02:46:04.000 Are you allowed to do that?

02:46:04.000 Can you do that?

02:46:05.000 I guess you can.

02:46:06.000 You can do that.

02:46:07.000 You're talking about a hot pocket, what they call on the forum.

02:46:09.000 But people might not invite you to their cocktail party. 1.00

02:46:11.000 But if you get caught fucking a pig, even if the pig's having a great old time. 1.00

02:46:14.000 Like if you're fucking a pig and the pig's like... 1.00

02:46:17.000 Loving it. 1.00

02:46:18.000 Loving it. 0.98

02:46:19.000 Is that your pig impression? 0.97

02:46:21.000 This is my pig just really hitting at the right spot. 1.00

02:46:23.000 That pig is like, oh shit, baby. 1.00

02:46:24.000 You're wiggling your head, dude. 1.00

02:46:26.000 Oh shit, son. 1.00

02:46:27.000 That's illegal. 1.00

02:46:28.000 That's illegal. 0.97

02:46:29.000 Even if the pig finds you and starts backing up towards you, seeks you out. 1.00

02:46:34.000 But if you bend over and that pig's like, yo, let me get at that asshole, it's legal in most places. 1.00

02:46:40.000 Hey, let's go back to Dan Bilzerian. 0.99

02:46:41.000 No, it's not necessarily legal.

02:46:44.000 And I don't think it's legal in Washington State anymore.

02:46:46.000 No, not anymore because Mr. Hand's dying.

02:46:48.000 But it's not like a proactive, active thing.

02:46:51.000 I think it's illegal to just be engaging in sex.

02:46:55.000 I don't know.

02:46:55.000 Why, though?

02:46:56.000 Isn't that weird?

02:46:57.000 But that's the question. 0.99

02:46:57.000 Who gives a fuck? 0.99

02:46:58.000 Can you do body parts? 1.00

02:47:00.000 You know?

02:47:01.000 I don't know.

02:47:02.000 I don't get it.

02:47:21.000 Did the guy wind up dying?

02:47:21.000 Yeah.

02:47:23.000 Oh, yes. 0.93

02:47:24.000 He wanted to be slaughtered.

02:47:25.000 Put an ad out in Craigslist and like, where was that? 0.99

02:47:27.000 To be slaughtered and eaten.

02:47:28.000 And some dude was like, ooh, I'll do it. 0.99

02:47:30.000 I'll do it. 1.00

02:47:31.000 And he's like, listen, but the deal is you gotta eat my dick first. 1.00

02:47:34.000 Jesus Christ. 1.00

02:47:34.000 He's like, shit, I'll eat that dick like Kobayashi. 1.00

02:47:36.000 I'll barbecue that shit for you. 1.00

02:47:37.000 Oh, strange. 1.00

02:47:37.000 Japanese man, 22, cooks his own genitals and serves them... 1.00

02:47:41.000 No, this is... 1.00

02:47:41.000 This is a different one. 1.00

02:47:42.000 This is a different story.

02:47:43.000 This is a guy who didn't like his gender. 1.00

02:47:43.000 That one's fucking nuts, though. 1.00

02:47:46.000 He was asexual. 1.00

02:47:48.000 So he decided to cut his dick and balls off and then serve them. 1.00

02:47:52.000 Did the party know, though, or is it like Hannibal style? 1.00

02:47:55.000 No, they knew.

02:47:58.000 They were garnished with mushrooms and parsley.

02:48:00.000 They paid 160, what is that, pounds?

02:48:03.000 I don't know.

02:48:04.000 Per person.

02:48:04.000 Way too much, way too much.

02:48:06.000 That's what it is, way too much. 1.00

02:48:07.000 To eat his severed genitalia in Tokyo. 0.95

02:48:08.000 At least they were garnished with mushrooms and parsley. 0.98

02:48:10.000 I like mine with lemon and capers.

02:48:12.000 You get everything, though. 0.99

02:48:13.000 You get the shaft, the testes, and the scrotum. 0.99

02:48:16.000 Look at this. 1.00

02:48:17.000 He cooked the genitalia himself as he was supervised by a chef. 0.99

02:48:21.000 Whoa. 1.00

02:48:22.000 In a tweet, he offered to cook his penis for a guest for whatever that squiggly mark is. 1.00

02:48:26.000 I'm offering my male genitals full penis test. 1.00

02:48:29.000 He screwed him as a meal for 100,000 yen. 1.00

02:48:31.000 That's 800 pounds.

02:48:33.000 So that's roughly, what, $1,000?

02:48:35.000 A little Asian guy, though.

02:48:37.000 That's a...

02:48:38.000 Is a pound more than a dollar or less than a dollar now?

02:48:41.000 It varies, right?

02:48:43.000 It's more now?

02:48:44.000 It's worth more?

02:48:45.000 So 800 pounds is like a thousand. 0.97

02:48:46.000 He decided to split the meal between six guests, so you're not getting a lot of dick for your money. 0.96

02:48:50.000 The organs were surgically removed at age 22. I was tested to be free of venereal diseases. 0.95

02:48:56.000 The organs were of normal function.

02:48:58.000 I was not receiving female hormone treatment. 1.00

02:49:02.000 So he took the dick and balls away a year ago, a year before this. 1.00

02:49:07.000 Kept that shit on ice. 1.00

02:49:08.000 Oh my god. 1.00

02:49:10.000 Well, that's probably going to tenderize it a little bit.

02:49:12.000 That works with elk meat.

02:49:13.000 Yeah, it depends how you let it simmer.

02:49:14.000 Depends how you let it simmer.

02:49:15.000 No, I mean, it's freezing.

02:49:16.000 You freeze it for a year.

02:49:17.000 It actually breaks down some of the tissue. 0.96

02:49:19.000 Especially that scrotum.

02:49:20.000 A lot of guys who hunt moose, they don't eat it for like six months. 0.98

02:49:23.000 Oh really, and it breaks down?

02:49:24.000 Yeah.

02:49:24.000 Ranella's brother told me that.

02:49:25.000 I feel like the dick would be pretty soft, like a filet. 1.00

02:49:27.000 Yeah. 1.00

02:49:28.000 I feel sick.

02:49:28.000 It would be all fat.

02:49:30.000 I feel sick.

02:49:31.000 I feel really sick.

02:49:32.000 I know, but so... 1.00

02:49:33.000 Because I'm thinking about the six people eating this tiny dick, like calamari. 1.00

02:49:38.000 Yeah, not good. 1.00

02:49:39.000 The other guy's a different story, though. 0.93

02:49:40.000 Find out about the guy who hired someone to kill him and eat him.

02:49:43.000 Yeah, that one's different. 1.00

02:49:44.000 But there's a lot of weird dick-eating people. 1.00

02:49:46.000 Who the fuck signed you up to go to that dinner? 1.00

02:49:48.000 Are you guys going over to Ching's eat that dick? 1.00

02:49:50.000 Can you call him crazy? 1.00

02:49:51.000 Well, do you guys know about the Japanese guy? 0.65

02:49:53.000 There's a Japanese guy who killed a woman and ate her and did a little bit of time in jail and somehow or another got off or got out.

02:50:00.000 And now is a celebrity and he jokes around about eating people. 0.89

02:50:04.000 He murdered some girl and ate her.

02:50:06.000 And now he does pictures.

02:50:08.000 The Japanese culture is very different than ours. 0.99

02:50:10.000 And he does these pictures where he pretends to be biting people and eating people. 0.90

02:50:14.000 He's like a scary, strange fetish celebrity. 0.85

02:50:16.000 I'm trying to remember the dude's name. 0.69

02:50:18.000 Ozawa or something like that.

02:50:20.000 You find him?

02:50:21.000 No, I was looking for that, but you started almost...

02:50:23.000 I found this was even weirder.

02:50:25.000 What is this? 0.99

02:50:26.000 That article that damn thing's in the way. 0.99

02:50:28.000 Man slices or woman slices. 0.99

02:50:30.000 Close down at the bottom of it.

02:50:31.000 You can get rid of it.

02:50:32.000 No, you see the right below that?

02:50:33.000 Audible?

02:50:34.000 Oh my god, they're all popping up.

02:50:36.000 This is gross.

02:50:37.000 Oh my god, look at all these things that pop up.

02:50:39.000 Yeah, I feel sick. 1.00

02:50:40.000 I feel physically sick thinking of these eating dick. 1.00

02:50:43.000 Ew. 1.00

02:50:44.000 You can't get rid of that ad?

02:50:45.000 No.

02:50:45.000 Oh my god.

02:50:46.000 Audible.

02:50:47.000 Oh, there it goes.

02:50:47.000 Okay.

02:50:49.000 Oh, it's like a coding issue, huh?

02:50:51.000 Yeah.

02:50:51.000 I see.

02:50:52.000 Interesting, though.

02:50:53.000 It's going to things that you've researched, like Richard Dawkins, the God of the Illusion, Meat Eater, Sam Harris. 0.98

02:51:00.000 Woman slices off rapist's genitalia, forces him to eat it at gunpoint. 1.00

02:51:04.000 See, that's tight move. 1.00

02:51:05.000 That I'm cool with.

02:51:06.000 I'm in her camp. 1.00

02:51:06.000 Because this guy kidnapped her, he raped her. 1.00

02:51:08.000 Keep going down. 1.00

02:51:09.000 Look at that guy's face.

02:51:10.000 And then she... 1.00

02:51:11.000 Convicted child molester. 0.61

02:51:12.000 She then approached Williams, tied him up in a bit of a bridge, grabbed a knife, and castrated him. 1.00

02:51:17.000 Wow.

02:51:17.000 Is that the plot of the tattoo girl?

02:51:19.000 William fell asleep after drinking massive amounts of alcohol, and Walt was able to untie herself.

02:51:22.000 And then she basically... 0.97

02:51:24.000 See, I'm with that.

02:51:25.000 That's cool.

02:51:26.000 That's awesome. 1.00

02:51:27.000 She should have killed him afterwards. 1.00

02:51:28.000 I see that bastard's junk in the microwave, grab the plate, fork, and steak knife, and cut it up like hot dogs. 1.00

02:51:33.000 Wow, and force him to eat it at gunpoint. 1.00

02:51:34.000 I grab the gun that he had left on the kitchen counter, walk over to him, force him to eat it.

02:51:37.000 I have no remorse, and I am not sorry. 1.00

02:51:39.000 That bastard deserved it, and he's going to hell. 1.00

02:51:41.000 Did she get in trouble? 1.00

02:51:41.000 I agree with her. 1.00

02:51:42.000 Eat that dick, son. 1.00

02:51:44.000 See, now that's a case where I think that girl should get a medal. 1.00

02:51:47.000 Me too.

02:51:48.000 Why are we not celebrating her?

02:51:49.000 Why does she not have her own podcast? 0.95

02:51:51.000 Is she in trouble?

02:51:51.000 Find out if she's in trouble.

02:51:53.000 It'd be hilarious if she wasn't. 0.99

02:51:53.000 Hope not. 0.99

02:51:54.000 Because she didn't kill him, right? 1.00

02:51:55.000 Just fed him that dick. 1.00

02:51:56.000 That's allowed. 1.00

02:51:57.000 Well, she cut his dick off. 1.00

02:51:57.000 That should be allowed. 1.00

02:51:59.000 Fantastic.

02:51:59.000 Hey, man.

02:52:00.000 Well, you can't say self-defense. 1.00

02:52:02.000 Well, she was tied up, got out, cut that dick off, forced him to eat it. 1.00

02:52:06.000 Yeah, he needs to die. 1.00

02:52:07.000 Of course. 1.00

02:52:08.000 Well, it's almost better he's alive now with no dick. 0.99

02:52:10.000 No, because he can still hurt people. 0.99

02:52:12.000 Good luck in jail.

02:52:13.000 You know, a lot of those guys, what they're doing is psychological. 1.00

02:52:16.000 Son of a bitch. 1.00

02:52:17.000 False. 1.00

02:52:17.000 What? 1.00

02:52:18.000 It's fake? 1.00

02:52:19.000 God damn it. 0.99

02:52:19.000 Yeah. 0.99

02:52:19.000 Oh, damn it. 0.99

02:52:20.000 Well, the picture, I was like, well, that picture will tell. 0.99

02:52:22.000 Jamie Snopes it.

02:52:24.000 A fake news site posing as a Los Angeles area outlet KTLA spread a fabricated but juicy tale of a woman's revenge. 1.00

02:52:34.000 That was a plot from the girl with the tattoo, whatever the fuck it was. 0.99

02:52:38.000 Oh, girl with the dragon tattoo? 1.00

02:52:39.000 Yeah, that's why I was like, haven't I seen that, that rapist? 1.00

02:52:41.000 She fucked him up. 1.00

02:52:42.000 She doesn't feed him his dick, but she fucked him up and writes like, whore or whatever on his back and tattoo. 1.00

02:52:47.000 Good move. 1.00

02:52:48.000 Mm-hmm.

02:52:49.000 See, but we're all in agreement of something like that.

02:52:51.000 Yeah, we are.

02:52:52.000 You see the possibility of someone actually doing that and how you support it?

02:52:55.000 I'm 100% in agreement of that.

02:52:56.000 Me too.

02:52:57.000 Brian, are you checking the tweets to see if people love you?

02:52:58.000 No, I'm not.

02:52:59.000 I'm seeing when we have to be at CAA. You guys have a meeting?

02:53:03.000 Yeah.

02:53:04.000 What time is your meeting?

02:53:05.000 I don't know.

02:53:05.000 I just got a call from my agent.

02:53:06.000 I may have to listen to it real quick.

02:53:08.000 What are you guys doing?

02:53:09.000 You got some fighting the kid business?

02:53:11.000 Yeah, we're big shots right now.

02:53:13.000 Hot in the streets right now.

02:53:14.000 Victim of cannibal agreed to be eaten.

02:53:17.000 To the family next door.

02:53:18.000 Oh, this is the guy.

02:53:19.000 Seems like the perfect neighbor.

02:53:20.000 He mowed their lawn, repaired their car, even invited them around for dinner.

02:53:24.000 Other residents in the small German town of Rottenburg also believed there was nothing odd about the 42-year-old computer expert whose light burned late into the night inside his creaking mansion.

02:53:34.000 Yesterday, however...

02:53:36.000 Muse appeared in court charged with killing and then frying and eating another man.

02:53:43.000 Wow. 1.00

02:53:44.000 Crazy shit, right? 1.00

02:53:45.000 Yeah, he met the 43-year-old Berlin engineer, Bern Brandes, after advertising on the internet. 1.00

02:53:53.000 And had chopped him up and eaten him.

02:53:55.000 It was, he said, something he had wanted to do for a long time.

02:53:59.000 I always had the fantasy, and in the end I fulfilled it, Mews said to the court on his first day of his trial for murder in the nearby city of Kessel. 0.86

02:53:59.000 Okay, man. 0.86

02:54:09.000 Yesterday, German prosecutors described how Mews had fantasized about killing and devouring someone, including his classmates, from the age of eight.

02:54:17.000 The desire grew stronger after the death of his mother in 1999, Prosecutor Markus Kohler said, In March of 2001, Muse advertised on the internet for a young, well-built man who wanted to be eaten.

02:54:30.000 Oh, he advertised.

02:54:32.000 So he asked if anybody wants to be eaten.

02:54:35.000 Oh, and this guy was like, I'm down.

02:54:36.000 Yeah, so it was the opposite.

02:54:38.000 In the evening of March 9th, two men went to the bedroom in Muse's rambling, tumbled farmhouse. 0.98

02:54:44.000 Mr. Brandes swallowed 20 sleeping tablets and half a bottle of schnapps before Muse cut off Brandes' penis with his agreement. 0.90

02:54:54.000 And fried it for both of them to eat. 1.00

02:54:56.000 Fried dick. 1.00

02:54:57.000 Whoa, fried dick. 1.00

02:54:58.000 Brandis, by this stage, bleeding heavily, then took a bath while Muse read a Star Trek novel. 1.00

02:55:06.000 Gangster. 1.00

02:55:06.000 The guy cut his dick off and he went and read a book while the guy bled out in a tub. 1.00

02:55:12.000 Star Trek at that. 1.00

02:55:13.000 Who reads a Star Trek novel?

02:55:15.000 In the early hours of the morning, he finished off his victim by stabbing him in the neck with a large kitchen knife, kissing him first. 1.00

02:55:28.000 Some weird shit. 0.99

02:55:29.000 The cannibal then chopped Mr. Brandis' into pieces and put several bits of him in his freezer next to a takeaway pizza and buried the skull in his garden. 0.99

02:55:39.000 Over the next few weeks, he defrosted and cooked parts of Mr. Brandis in olive oil and garlic, eventually consuming 20 kilograms of human flesh before police finally turned up at his door.

02:55:52.000 With my every bite, my memory of him grew stronger, he said. 1.00

02:55:55.000 That bitch is crazy. 1.00

02:55:57.000 Behind bars, Muse told detectives that he first consumed his victim with a bottle of South African red wine, had got out his best cutlery, and decorated his dinner table with candles. 1.00

02:56:08.000 He toasted, he tasted of pork, he said.

02:56:11.000 He added, whoa, Jesus Christ.

02:56:14.000 It's not illegal.

02:56:16.000 Yeah.

02:56:17.000 The unprecedented case had proven problematic for German lawyers who discovered that cannibalism is not illegal in Germany.

02:56:23.000 But it's murder.

02:56:24.000 Okay, so instead they've charged Muse with murder for the purposes of sexual pleasure and with disturbing the peace of the dead. 0.99

02:56:30.000 Oh shit, there's video of this. 0.99

02:56:32.000 What? 1.00

02:56:33.000 Crucial to the case is a gruesome videotape made...

02:56:37.000 Of the entire evening, during which Brandes apparently makes clear his consent.

02:56:42.000 Whoa. 1.00

02:56:42.000 I'm trying to see that deep-fried dick go down. 1.00

02:56:44.000 Oh my god. 1.00

02:56:45.000 I want to see what that's like.

02:56:46.000 Oh my god.

02:56:47.000 Before setting off on his one-way journey to Rottenburg, Brandes was outwardly, at least, a successful, financially secure professional with a live-in girlfriend.

02:56:55.000 Jesus Christ.

02:56:56.000 Live-in girlfriend? 1.00

02:56:57.000 Hey, bitch. 1.00

02:56:57.000 After killing Brandes, the German cannibal met five other men who responded to his internet advert, including one from London. 1.00

02:57:05.000 He did not, however, kill them.

02:57:07.000 His girlfriend broke up with him because it revealed that he liked men.

02:57:11.000 Jesus Christ.

02:57:12.000 Well, he likes to eat them. 1.00

02:57:13.000 I eat dicks, girl. 1.00

02:57:14.000 Yeah. 1.00

02:57:14.000 Is that a problem for you? 1.00

02:57:16.000 Listen to this.

02:57:17.000 In July of 2001, a student stumbled over Mew's chat room and lured the German authorities who arrested him last December.

02:57:23.000 So he was, like, out running around for a while.

02:57:25.000 How long was the time between December and when he killed the dude?

02:57:30.000 I don't know.

02:57:30.000 There are a lot of people who might eat other people.

02:57:31.000 Holy fuck, this guy is messed up. 1.00

02:57:34.000 He ate 20 kilograms of the guy's body. 1.00

02:57:36.000 20 kilograms is 44 pounds?

02:57:39.000 That's 44 meals.

02:57:41.000 A lot of it went to waste.

02:57:43.000 I don't know.

02:57:44.000 That's a 200 pound man.

02:57:45.000 He didn't eat at all.

02:57:48.000 He still had some of it.

02:57:49.000 They caught him before he could finish it all.

02:57:50.000 What does this say?

02:57:51.000 The pre-trial interview, the cannibal said that after eating Brandis, he felt much better and more stable.

02:57:58.000 Hmm. 0.99

02:57:58.000 This bitch said he fantasized about having a blonde young brother who could keep forever by consuming him. 0.99

02:58:04.000 Hey man, you batshit crazy. 1.00

02:58:07.000 Oh yeah. 0.99

02:58:08.000 Although they say that serial killers, like they get the final step is when they start eating and drinking the blood of their victims because it's their way of consuming and having complete and total power over them.

02:58:19.000 Hey, he only gets five years in jail though.

02:58:21.000 What? 1.00

02:58:21.000 How that fuck's back on the streets in five years is crazy. 1.00

02:58:23.000 Well, he's already back on the street then, because I feel like this story was five years ago. 1.00

02:58:27.000 Scroll up, Jimmy.

02:58:28.000 Longer than five years ago. 1.00

02:58:29.000 That bitch might have got out today. 1.00

02:58:29.000 They made a movie about this. 1.00

02:58:31.000 2013. So it was three.

02:58:32.000 Oh, three.

02:58:33.000 2003. Oh, he's out.

02:58:34.000 He's out.

02:58:35.000 He's out eating. 1.00

02:58:36.000 Yeah, Google this motherfucker. 1.00

02:58:37.000 Armin. 1.00

02:58:38.000 Google that guy and put the word released.

02:58:41.000 Look at him. 1.00

02:58:42.000 He looks like a guy that eat your dick. 1.00

02:58:44.000 Oh my god, he's a terrifying dude. 1.00

02:58:46.000 Yeah.

02:58:47.000 He didn't win the lottery when it came to looks.

02:58:49.000 There you go, sweetie. 1.00

02:58:50.000 Look at his fucking face. 1.00

02:58:52.000 An interview with a cat. 1.00

02:58:53.000 There's an interview with him?

02:58:54.000 A set of chompers on him.

02:58:55.000 Whoa.

02:58:56.000 Dude, dude.

02:58:57.000 Did they make a movie about this?

02:58:58.000 Yeah.

02:58:59.000 I don't think so.

02:59:00.000 They did?

02:59:00.000 Yeah, they did.

02:59:01.000 Oh, I gotta see it.

02:59:02.000 Video original?

02:59:03.000 No way.

02:59:04.000 No.

02:59:05.000 What is that?

02:59:05.000 That's the movie, I think.

02:59:06.000 Yeah.

02:59:07.000 That's the movie?

02:59:08.000 Grim Love.

02:59:08.000 I'm not ready for the original.

02:59:10.000 Oh my god.

02:59:11.000 My mind's not right.

02:59:12.000 Is there a real video?

02:59:14.000 Oh, those are clay puppets. 1.00

02:59:16.000 That shit looked real though for a second. 1.00

02:59:18.000 Oh my god. 1.00

02:59:19.000 Yeah. 1.00

02:59:20.000 They show that guy with his dick cut off. 1.00

02:59:21.000 What the fuck is that? 1.00

02:59:22.000 Is that the real one? 1.00

02:59:23.000 Oh, that's a shoulder.

02:59:24.000 Oh, that's the real one, man.

02:59:25.000 That's him splitting the guy down the middle.

02:59:27.000 What?

02:59:28.000 What?

02:59:29.000 Yeah, don't show people, but that's him.

02:59:31.000 That's him splitting the guy down the middle.

02:59:33.000 Yeah, okay.

02:59:34.000 That was the real pictures.

02:59:36.000 That guy hung him by his ankles and split him down the middle. 1.00

02:59:40.000 Yeah, and bled him out into buckets and shit. 1.00

02:59:44.000 Boy. 0.99

02:59:45.000 They say that the, who was the guy?

02:59:47.000 He probably hung him up.

02:59:48.000 He said he stabbed him in the neck. 0.98

02:59:50.000 That's probably how he killed him. 0.99

02:59:51.000 He probably hung him upside down and killed him.

02:59:53.000 Gotti's hitman, Richard, Ted, what was the guy's name?

02:59:58.000 Who was the Iceman?

02:59:59.000 Kuklinski? 0.78

02:59:59.000 Yeah, he said that what they would do is they would hang the body, bleed it, Yeah. 0.78

03:00:09.000 Yeah.

03:00:20.000 I read this book called Murder Machine.

03:00:22.000 Joey Diaz gave it to me back in the day.

03:00:24.000 It was all about this guy who was a mob.

03:00:26.000 Roy DeMeo, I think his name was. 0.99

03:00:28.000 He was a mob assassin who just became a fucking complete-on, full-on psychopath, serial killer who killed God knows how many people. 1.00

03:00:37.000 Just killed people left and right for whatever fucking reason he wanted to. 1.00

03:00:40.000 And this place that they lived, this bar area where they had an apartment upstairs where they used to kill people in this apartment, they just fucking killed like a hundred people there. 1.00

03:00:49.000 Jesus. 0.99

03:00:49.000 He just got addicted to killing people. 0.99

03:00:51.000 And this is a book about...

03:00:52.000 Is it in his words?

03:00:54.000 Well, it's the story.

03:00:55.000 The investigators that caught him, how they caught him.

03:00:58.000 But it's a disturbing book, man.

03:00:59.000 It's one of those books where you go, whoa.

03:01:01.000 You just have to realize those people are out there.

03:01:03.000 They're out there.

03:01:04.000 They're out there.

03:01:04.000 Stuff makes me sick.

03:01:06.000 It should.

03:01:06.000 That's why we need Tim Kennedy, etc.

03:01:07.000 I can't read that shit. 1.00

03:01:09.000 Exactly. 1.00

03:01:10.000 Yeah.

03:01:10.000 Here it is.

03:01:11.000 An interview with a cannibal.

03:01:12.000 Documentary sheds new light on one of Germany's most infamous murders.

03:01:15.000 And this is from 2016. This year it's on YouTube.

03:01:19.000 I was just looking at it.

03:01:20.000 So he's free.

03:01:20.000 What's the documentary called?

03:01:22.000 He was in jail for eight years.

03:01:23.000 I found out he said he became a vegetarian while he was in jail as well. 1.00

03:01:26.000 Bitch, please. 1.00

03:01:27.000 You can't eat dicks until we just eat veggies. 1.00

03:01:29.000 He's going to come out and he's going to start eating people again. 0.99

03:01:33.000 You're eating 40 pounds a man, then be like, nah, man, I'm not into meat anymore.

03:01:36.000 How much do you think the footage of the act itself, which was shown in a closed room during a trial, is described in the documentary as too disturbing to show and so shocking that only 19 minutes of the four-hour video was shown.

03:01:49.000 Oh, man. 0.99

03:01:50.000 Holy shit. 1.00

03:01:52.000 His behavior as a child was described as, like most other children his age, he loved animals and found country life idyllic. 1.00

03:02:01.000 Well... 1.00

03:02:03.000 God, look at that fucking guy. 1.00

03:02:05.000 Some people look just crazy. 1.00

03:02:06.000 Is that the guy he ate?

03:02:07.000 Yeah.

03:02:08.000 Yeah, that's the guy he ate.

03:02:09.000 He looks stable. 0.90

03:02:10.000 That guy wanted to be butchered, huh?

03:02:12.000 Because his girlfriend caught him with men?

03:02:14.000 Is that what it was?

03:02:16.000 The flesh tastes like pork, but stronger.

03:02:18.000 Oh, Jesus Christ.

03:02:19.000 It's just amazing that he's free now.

03:02:23.000 I almost wish I could speak German so I could understand what he's saying. 1.00

03:02:26.000 Bring his dumb ass in here with a translator. 1.00

03:02:30.000 You don't want to hear it? 1.00

03:02:31.000 Well, I don't know, man.

03:02:32.000 He's not going to kill you guys.

03:02:33.000 It's almost like a, no, bring him in?

03:02:34.000 No, that's never happened.

03:02:35.000 Yeah, yeah, bring him in with a translator, like a UFC interview in Germany.

03:02:38.000 I wouldn't want that guy knowing where I am.

03:02:40.000 Well, he just knows where your studio's at. 1.00

03:02:41.000 I'd have to kill him. 1.00

03:02:44.000 Maybe we bring him here, kill him, eat his ass. 1.00

03:02:46.000 I want to start carrying two guns. 1.00

03:02:48.000 That guy's not going to kill you with a gun.

03:02:50.000 That guy's not going to kill you with a gun.

03:02:51.000 He's not going to kill you. 0.75

03:02:53.000 Everyone here can beat him up. 1.00

03:02:54.000 Yeah, if you let him kill you, he'll eat you for days. 0.98

03:02:56.000 If you give him any sort of light, like, yeah, you know, I'm kind of depressed. 0.99

03:02:59.000 He's killing you.

03:03:00.000 Depression is better served with wine.

03:03:03.000 But there are people in vans right now trolling around looking for someone to eat.

03:03:07.000 I don't think so.

03:03:09.000 There are, definitely. 0.98

03:03:10.000 I mean, it goes back to when we were talking about bathrooms and transgender people and the amount of creeps that are actually not transgender, just sexual predators. 0.91

03:03:20.000 There's a small amount. 0.98

03:03:22.000 They'll come up with an angle, a way to get into a bathroom. 0.97

03:03:23.000 There's someone in a van right now?

03:03:24.000 There's a small amount of people right now in this country, just this country, that are fighting off the urge to commit rape and murder.

03:03:31.000 Oh, for sure.

03:03:32.000 Monsters, right?

03:03:33.000 You told me a white van, a group of dudes is driving around L.A. trying to...

03:03:36.000 You people.

03:03:37.000 I mean, probably not, but is there likely someone...

03:03:40.000 Look, all he has to do is one crime where someone drinks someone's blood and kills someone by biting them in the neck, and then it becomes a copycat.

03:03:46.000 People are weird, man.

03:03:48.000 I met a girl who...

03:03:49.000 We were talking and said, well, I've had trouble getting on my...

03:03:53.000 Yeah.

03:03:53.000 It's too much.

03:03:55.000 We're ruining Brendan.

03:03:56.000 We're ruining him, man.

03:03:58.000 I met a girl who said...

03:03:59.000 She said, now I need to move.

03:04:00.000 She couldn't get... 0.99

03:04:01.000 She'd had a tough time the last two years, and I was trying to ask her.

03:04:04.000 Finally, she said, well, my cousin was killed.

03:04:06.000 My first cousin was killed.

03:04:07.000 And I said, this guy was killing men.

03:04:10.000 He was spiking their drinks. 1.00

03:04:13.000 He would take them outside, have sex with them, and then kill them. 1.00

03:04:16.000 Oh, Jesus Christ. 1.00

03:04:17.000 There are people that just do weird shit. 1.00

03:04:19.000 They're just kind of predators. 1.00

03:04:20.000 They set their whole life up that way.

03:04:22.000 I'm aware of predators.

03:04:23.000 You guys told me there's people in vans looking around to eat people. 0.99

03:04:26.000 There's people that are fucked over. 0.99

03:04:27.000 With puppies as lures and as Cadbury eggs and Twizzlers. 1.00

03:04:30.000 That's how you get him in the fucking van. 1.00

03:04:32.000 Just put some Twizzlers there. 1.00

03:04:33.000 I thought you were done.

03:04:34.000 What happened?

03:04:35.000 I am, but if you put it in my face.

03:04:36.000 That's so weird.

03:04:37.000 If you crack the Cadbury egg, I'm like, yo, dog, look at this. 1.00

03:04:39.000 Oh, shit. 1.00

03:04:40.000 What's this, goosh? 1.00

03:04:41.000 Wouldn't do a goddamn thing to me. 0.99

03:04:42.000 Listen, if you're really weak, there's some chili mangoes. 0.99

03:04:45.000 Oh, you can't face me.

03:04:46.000 I haven't cheated yet, dog.

03:04:47.000 Okay, I'm just saying.

03:04:49.000 If I open that bag.

03:04:50.000 If I walked in there and you had fresh Cadbury eggs peeled from the wrapper.

03:04:53.000 What about those chili mangoes?

03:04:54.000 What if I just open one of those bags and let you smell it?

03:04:56.000 No, it does nothing.

03:04:57.000 Really?

03:04:57.000 I get excited.

03:04:58.000 Alright, well.

03:04:59.000 If you had to eat five, you could only eat five foods, what would they be?

03:05:02.000 That Cadbury egg might sound free.

03:05:03.000 Five foods forever?

03:05:04.000 Yep.

03:05:04.000 Well, if I was restricted to that, I would do it only based on nutrition.

03:05:08.000 So elk meat?

03:05:09.000 Yeah, I would eat something like that, like wild game meat, avocados, healthy vegetables like kale. 1.00

03:05:15.000 It would be all boring shit. 0.99

03:05:16.000 Well, elk meat's not boring, but if I can only pick... 1.00

03:05:20.000 I would have to leave it at that.

03:05:21.000 But I think if you only ate five things, you're probably going to get sick.

03:05:24.000 Unless you're supplementing yourself, you've got to make sure you're getting a proper amount of vitamin C. Yams, I'd imagine yams, kale, avocado, elk.

03:05:35.000 You've got a lot of stuff there, right?

03:05:36.000 I think people benefit more than other animals do on a variety of different foods.

03:05:40.000 Yeah, sure.

03:05:41.000 On varying their diet.

03:05:42.000 Yeah.

03:05:43.000 Like, animals have a problem with that.

03:05:44.000 Like, dogs.

03:05:44.000 Like, you can't switch up dog food.

03:05:46.000 If you give a dog one kind of food, then you give them something else, they just get explosive diarrhea.

03:05:50.000 Babies are the same way, though.

03:05:51.000 Like, if you change the formula, baby goes, what? 1.00

03:05:53.000 And shit everywhere. 1.00

03:05:54.000 Can you get too much iron from eating meat every day? 1.00

03:05:58.000 Too much iron?

03:05:59.000 Yeah.

03:06:00.000 That's interesting.

03:06:01.000 I've never heard that before.

03:06:01.000 Because I had a high iron count one time when I went and got my blood done.

03:06:05.000 Well, how much meat are you eating? 0.97

03:06:06.000 But he said, not a lot, but he said, you know what's fucking crazy? 0.94

03:06:10.000 I was cooking from a cast iron. 0.95

03:06:13.000 Oh, yeah.

03:06:13.000 Yeah, and cast iron will actually...

03:06:15.000 Gives you iron in your food.

03:06:16.000 Yes.

03:06:17.000 Trace iron, because that's the only...

03:06:18.000 So he said you got a lot of high ferrous levels or something.

03:06:19.000 Yeah, I cook a lot in iron pans.

03:06:21.000 It's supposed to be the best thing for you.

03:06:23.000 It's a good way to get iron.

03:06:24.000 Yeah.

03:06:24.000 Probably a good way for people to get iron, too, that are vegetarians, even if you eat eggs.

03:06:29.000 That's exactly what they tell vegetarians, to cook in a cast iron skillet.

03:06:32.000 Yeah, that's a good way to do it.

03:06:33.000 Because you get low iron if you're a vegetarian.

03:06:35.000 You also get a lot of creatine if you're eating a lot of red meat.

03:06:38.000 You don't need a dose on creatine.

03:06:39.000 I used to take so much creatine, but because of this diet, I eat a lot of red meat, stuff like that.

03:06:44.000 I don't take any creatine.

03:06:45.000 So you're doing your ketogenic, right?

03:06:46.000 Yeah, I think creatine is a legit supplement.

03:06:49.000 It's one of the few legit supplements that actually does really increase your strength.

03:06:53.000 I've been taking it.

03:06:54.000 And recovery.

03:06:55.000 It does.

03:06:55.000 It's legit.

03:06:56.000 You know, a lot of these things, it goes back to the Yoel Romero thing, and even the Jeff Nowitzki thing, a lot of the stuff that we see in these stores, like GNCs and health stores that have these muscle-building things, a lot of those things are really steroids.

03:07:12.000 Really?

03:07:13.000 Yeah.

03:07:14.000 Wow.

03:07:14.000 A different form.

03:07:15.000 Yeah.

03:07:15.000 Like, wow.

03:07:16.000 That's why guys keep pissing hot from them.

03:07:19.000 The USADA has a website that we, when Novitski was here, he sent us to the website, and you go like A through Z, you find whatever the supplement is, and you list to see whether or not people have been popped for it.

03:07:31.000 Right.

03:07:31.000 Like, they test, and they pull these things off the market, and they just come back with some new name.

03:07:35.000 They switch up molecules.

03:07:36.000 Remember Mark McGuire, the stuff he was using, you could buy at GM. Androstein, yeah.

03:07:41.000 I took that shit. 1.00

03:07:41.000 For a long time. 1.00

03:07:42.000 I took that shit. 1.00

03:07:43.000 Yeah, you could buy all that shit. 1.00

03:07:44.000 It was okay. 1.00

03:07:44.000 Was that a steroid? 1.00

03:07:45.000 Yeah.

03:07:45.000 Well, sort of.

03:07:46.000 It was a steroid hormone precursor, but here's the deal.

03:07:50.000 He wasn't taking that.

03:07:52.000 Well, hold up.

03:07:52.000 He was taking straight up steroids.

03:07:55.000 He was taking that and fucking whatever. 0.99

03:07:55.000 I don't even think he was taking that. 0.99

03:07:56.000 I bet he popped him for the fuck of it just to see how he felt. 0.99

03:08:00.000 Maybe. 1.00

03:08:00.000 But he was injecting straight testosterone like this in his neck. 1.00

03:08:04.000 Yeah.

03:08:04.000 That Andrastine Dion worked a little.

03:08:07.000 Jason Giambi, Sammy Soho.

03:08:10.000 Do you see how big...

03:08:11.000 It's been a lesson to me where I look back and I realize when you play sports and you live weights, nobody's 240 pounds and just that jacked.

03:08:20.000 Some people are.

03:08:21.000 Some people are.

03:08:22.000 A lot of professional athletes are.

03:08:23.000 But you don't go from being...

03:08:25.000 That's true.

03:08:26.000 But you don't go from being 185 when you're 25. If you see a big dramatic difference, especially if they're like a veteran, yeah, something's up.

03:08:33.000 But there's a You can achieve some incredible results with discipline and the right protocol with hypertrophy.

03:08:39.000 You could eat a lot of food all day long and lift crazy weights.

03:08:43.000 And when you're young, if your body holds up to the workload, you can put on some massive weight when you're young.

03:08:49.000 When your hormones are strong, if you do it the right way, like say if you had like a strength lifting coach and you said, hey, I want to gain 20 pounds of muscle. 0.99

03:08:56.000 If you had to do it right now, they would go, oh, we got to fuck with your hormones. 1.00

03:08:59.000 Right. 1.00

03:08:59.000 Like, you're too old at this point. 1.00

03:09:01.000 I've been told that, yeah.

03:09:03.000 But if you were 20 and you did the same thing...

03:09:06.000 It's a possibility.

03:09:07.000 It's a possibility.

03:09:07.000 Also, you probably have to have a body type.

03:09:09.000 I don't really think I could do...

03:09:10.000 You know, it's hard for me to put on any muscle.

03:09:13.000 Maybe, but you're not a guy who's ever tried.

03:09:16.000 If you're young, you have a strict program.

03:09:19.000 You're not frail.

03:09:20.000 No.

03:09:21.000 You're not skinny.

03:09:22.000 I don't call you skinny.

03:09:23.000 You're not a weightlifting guy, though, right?

03:09:25.000 I do lift, but not like that.

03:09:27.000 How often do you lift?

03:09:28.000 Probably twice a week.

03:09:30.000 Twice a week is fine.

03:09:32.000 When you lift, do you lift heavyweights?

03:09:34.000 I try to.

03:09:35.000 I'm a failure at six.

03:09:37.000 8, you know, I don't know if that's heavy.

03:09:39.000 But your guy's doing more of a cardio, like, circuit, right?

03:09:42.000 Like, you're not working out with that guy.

03:09:43.000 Like, you're not doing, like, heavy deadlifts, squats, bench.

03:09:45.000 Well, I'll do, like, lately, like, I'll go from deadlift to pull-ups, you know?

03:09:50.000 And the deadlift is, by the 8th one, I'm hurting, you know?

03:09:54.000 But, again, I'll do that once a week, you know?

03:09:57.000 And then I'll do maybe some bench with, like, 60-pound dumbbells.

03:10:02.000 And then I'll do front squat.

03:10:03.000 You're also 49. Yeah, I'm also 49. Well, you know, one of the things about Pavel Tatsulin, his interview with Tim Ferriss, he was talking about his dad getting involved in powerlifting when he was in his 60s.

03:10:16.000 He taught his dad powerlifting when his dad was in his 60s, and like six, seven years later, he put on X amount of pounds of muscle, and he said he looks like a 40-year-old man now from, like, if you see his back.

03:10:26.000 And he didn't do any supplements?

03:10:28.000 I think if you did power...

03:10:29.000 Look at my skeptical hippo face. 1.00

03:10:31.000 Get the fuck out of my face. 1.00

03:10:32.000 Skeptical hippo? 1.00

03:10:33.000 I didn't know about skeptical hippo.

03:10:34.000 Oh, you've never seen skeptical hippo?

03:10:35.000 No.

03:10:35.000 Jamie, bring that up.

03:10:36.000 Bring that up, Jamie.

03:10:37.000 Jamie, bring that up.

03:10:38.000 Yeah, it's really funny.

03:10:39.000 Jamie, bring that up.

03:10:39.000 By the way, powerlifting is good.

03:10:43.000 If you do it right, I think it's probably good for your hormones and good for your body.

03:10:47.000 Yes.

03:10:47.000 I feel good when I lift heavy.

03:10:48.000 I have more energy that day.

03:10:50.000 I really do.

03:10:51.000 It releases testosterone.

03:10:52.000 And the next day.

03:10:52.000 Yeah, it's good for you.

03:10:53.000 Well, what Pavel thinks is skeptical.

03:10:55.000 When you told me that six-year-old put on LBs, that's my face right now. 0.98

03:10:59.000 That's fucking hilarious. 0.97

03:11:02.000 You've never seen some of the more skeptical. 0.97

03:11:03.000 What he was talking about, what Pavel was talking about was his protocol, which is that never more than five repetitions and never go to failure.

03:11:13.000 Oh, really?

03:11:13.000 Yeah, his idea is that if you, say if you lift something and like the most reps you can do is like seven, cut it off at five and put it down.

03:11:21.000 And that strength is a skill.

03:11:23.000 And then you want what he calls greasing the groove, like doing something over and over again, giving yourself plenty of time in between it so that you're strong, you're fully recovered, and you'll get stronger and you'll get stronger faster.

03:11:33.000 Who's this guy?

03:11:34.000 Pavel Tatsulin.

03:11:35.000 He's the...

03:11:36.000 Godfather of kettlebells, the guy who came to America and started kettlebell programs.

03:11:40.000 All kettlebell instruction pretty much came out of that guy.

03:11:44.000 Does he live in LA? Yes, he does.

03:11:45.000 Really?

03:11:46.000 Yeah, he does.

03:11:46.000 He lives in Santa Monica, I believe.

03:11:47.000 I would pay him to work out.

03:11:49.000 The back of 75-year-old deadlifter.

03:11:52.000 100% drug-free.

03:11:53.000 That's his dad.

03:11:54.000 Yeah.

03:11:55.000 Well, I mean, who knows? 1.00

03:11:56.000 I mean, maybe his dad's some fucking savage. 1.00

03:11:58.000 Maybe some freak. 1.00

03:12:00.000 Yeah. 0.98

03:12:00.000 I'm for sure gonna need him to piss in this. 0.98

03:12:02.000 Yeah. 0.93

03:12:03.000 Hey, uh, golden snitch. 0.99

03:12:05.000 Get on it.

03:12:06.000 No, I don't.

03:12:07.000 Oh, a piss test.

03:12:08.000 When you work out with a guy like that guy, how long does that work out?

03:12:12.000 Is it an hour?

03:12:13.000 It's a good question.

03:12:13.000 If you're doing all that rest...

03:12:15.000 Well, what I do is, what I've been doing over the last few weeks since I listened to this podcast is, because I have stuff at home, I have a little gym in my house.

03:12:23.000 So what I'll do is I just start working out.

03:12:25.000 Well, not even in the garage.

03:12:26.000 Inside the house, I have a weight gym.

03:12:28.000 So I'll go and I'll just lift weights during the day and then I'll do it later at night.

03:12:33.000 I'll lift weights.

03:12:34.000 I'll go home now and I'll do a few sets of chin-ups and some kettlebell swings and curls and cleans and stuff like that.

03:12:42.000 Then later that night, I'll do clean squat press. 0.98

03:12:45.000 I'll do some different shit. 0.95

03:12:47.000 And I'll do my sets throughout the day like that. 0.98

03:12:50.000 You're splitting it up.

03:12:50.000 Yeah, instead of smashing it in.

03:12:52.000 But my cardio, I still do in one big set. 0.92

03:12:55.000 So what I like to do for cardio is I like to lift weights first and get really fucking tired. 0.56

03:13:01.000 Then, once I'm really tired, I do, like, balls-out cardio for a half hour. 0.81

03:13:05.000 That's cool.

03:13:05.000 So I'm already exhausted.

03:13:08.000 It's, like, more of a mental thing.

03:13:10.000 Hitting mitts for me is my cardio.

03:13:12.000 That's great.

03:13:13.000 Yeah, it's great cardio.

03:13:14.000 I've been getting my cardio in with my lifting, so I'll do, like, heavy deadlifts, and the set is whatever, a set of 10 of heavy deadlifts.

03:13:22.000 I go straight from there to the treadmill, and I'll sprint as fast.

03:13:24.000 As fast as I can for a minute.

03:13:26.000 On like level 10, 11, 12. Literally as fast as I can.

03:13:29.000 And I go to pull-ups.

03:13:30.000 I just do that for five rounds.

03:13:32.000 What's heavy deadlift for you?

03:13:33.000 That's awesome.

03:13:34.000 315 if I'm doing 10. That's a lot.

03:13:37.000 Because you do five rounds, it's a shit. 0.99

03:13:39.000 It gets exhausting. 1.00

03:13:40.000 Yeah, that only makes sense.

03:13:41.000 Heavy deadlifts, for me, cardio-wise, it wears me the fuck down.

03:13:44.000 Nothing feels better for me.

03:13:45.000 I do the crossbar where I stand in the middle of it, and I do deadlift with that.

03:13:50.000 That, to me, is always my go-to.

03:13:53.000 Well, they say specifically that bar, like using that trap bar for deadlifts, is one of the best ways to excite your entire system.

03:14:02.000 One of the safest, too.

03:14:02.000 One of the safest, but it's also like you're gripping it, the way you're gripping it.

03:14:07.000 There's something weird about that over-under grip that you do with a standard dumbbell, and then you bang it off your shins and straighten your back up. 0.97

03:14:13.000 But this motherfucker is right in the groove, so you can have really excellent posture. 0.98

03:14:17.000 It puts less of a load on your lower back, and you could really fucking stack up with some heavy weight. 0.99

03:14:22.000 You can do some cool stuff with it, too.

03:14:24.000 Farmer's walks.

03:14:25.000 Oh, yeah.

03:14:25.000 I was thumbing through a book called The Supple Leopard.

03:14:28.000 How to Become a Supple Leopard.

03:14:29.000 Oh, yeah.

03:14:29.000 Kelly Starrett.

03:14:30.000 Yeah.

03:14:31.000 That looks really cool.

03:14:32.000 Do you see what D'Elia did?

03:14:33.000 D'Elia didn't know who Kelly Starrett was.

03:14:36.000 He didn't know Kelly Starrett is a famous strength and conditioning guy.

03:14:39.000 He just saw a ridiculous photo of him. 0.98

03:14:41.000 He does look ridiculous. 0.97

03:14:41.000 So he did this long... 0.97

03:14:43.000 You know, D'Elia has a hilarious Instagram.

03:14:45.000 Oh, I saw that.

03:14:45.000 I saw that.

03:14:45.000 He has these long, huge run-on sentences of how fucked up these guys are.

03:14:50.000 Yes. 0.98

03:14:51.000 And he did it with Kelly Starrett and it's one of the funniest things he's ever done.

03:14:53.000 Look at that photo.

03:14:54.000 Look at what he said.

03:14:55.000 I mean, this dude, I can't stop laughing.

03:14:57.000 Does he know the camera can zoom out and he can put his head regular? 0.99

03:15:01.000 It looks like he's trying to peek into the lens saying, you guys fucking or can I come in? 0.99

03:15:08.000 He just keeps going on and on and on and on. 1.00

03:15:10.000 This is the most peeking-est motherfucker ever. 1.00

03:15:13.000 Even Tom is like, he peeks more than me. 1.00

03:15:16.000 He says, I'm dying.

03:15:17.000 This guy looks like he hurt his neck five seconds ago.

03:15:23.000 It's really funny.

03:15:23.000 Look how long you go.

03:15:24.000 Yeah, it keeps going and going.

03:15:25.000 I didn't want to read it all. 1.00

03:15:26.000 But he said, this is the look that you give a guy when you're fucking his wife after he fucked your wife. 1.00

03:15:35.000 He's so stupid. 1.00

03:15:36.000 He's so funny. 1.00

03:15:37.000 I retweeted it, but please go to Chris's account.

03:15:40.000 Go to Chris D'Elia and see it. 0.99

03:15:42.000 That's another funny motherfucker. 0.99

03:15:43.000 Oh, he's hilarious. 1.00

03:15:44.000 Jesus Christ.

03:15:45.000 He's another good dude, too, man.

03:15:46.000 It's nice having him around the store.

03:15:48.000 He's fun.

03:15:49.000 He's the best.

03:15:49.000 He's one of my favorite people.

03:15:50.000 That store is on Facebook.

03:15:53.000 Fire!

03:15:54.000 Fire!

03:15:55.000 You know what else is on fire?

03:15:56.000 The Fighter and the Kid! 0.55

03:15:58.000 This weekend, live in Boston, ladies and gentlemen.

03:16:00.000 The Wilbur Theater.

03:16:02.000 That's right, the Wilbur.

03:16:03.000 The Truckadero!

03:16:05.000 In Philly and Saturday as well.

03:16:06.000 And don't forget, Zaney's in Nashville.

03:16:09.000 Tomorrow.

03:16:09.000 But we might be sold out or almost.

03:16:11.000 We're in Nashville tomorrow.

03:16:12.000 Sold out in New York, but not sold out at the Wilbur.

03:16:14.000 You guys are in Nashville tomorrow?

03:16:16.000 For the Vince Vaughn Comedy Tour.

03:16:17.000 Dude, I'm there on Friday.

03:16:18.000 How long are you guys there for?

03:16:19.000 Just one night.

03:16:20.000 One night.

03:16:20.000 Then we go to New York, then we go to Boston, then we go to the Trocadero in Philly!

03:16:24.000 I wish I was there with you guys.

03:16:26.000 Me too, man.

03:16:27.000 We should organize some gigs, at least in the same town together.

03:16:30.000 Have you done Helium in St. Louis?

03:16:33.000 I've only done Helium in Portland, which is fucking outstanding, and Helium in Philly, which is one of the best clubs the world has ever known.

03:16:41.000 I'm doing their club in St. Louis June 9th, 10th, and 11th, so get your tickets.

03:16:46.000 I'm a big fan of Helium.

03:16:47.000 I like that website.

03:16:49.000 Who did that website? 0.99

03:16:49.000 My brother. 0.99

03:16:50.000 Your brother's a website designer?

03:16:51.000 Dude, his brother's a genius. 0.99

03:16:53.000 He's a beast.

03:16:54.000 He does all my online stuff.

03:16:55.000 Your brother makes websites?

03:16:57.000 Yeah.

03:16:57.000 Really?

03:16:57.000 Does he do it professionally, or does he just do it for you?

03:16:59.000 No, he just did it for us.

03:17:00.000 How long did it take him to do this?

03:17:01.000 He uses Squarespace, too.

03:17:02.000 Oh, no.

03:17:02.000 Wow.

03:17:03.000 Does he?

03:17:03.000 Yep.

03:17:03.000 This is Squarespace?

03:17:04.000 Uh-huh.

03:17:05.000 Dude. 0.88

03:17:05.000 Yeah, my brother's a beast. 0.88

03:17:06.000 This is really good. 0.88

03:17:08.000 Yeah, super beast.

03:17:08.000 He did a great job.

03:17:09.000 The photographs in the background are awesome.

03:17:11.000 All our merchandise.

03:17:11.000 Where'd you get that hat?

03:17:12.000 That's from a photo shoot.

03:17:14.000 An Abraham Lincoln karate movie?

03:17:16.000 Uh-huh.

03:17:16.000 You're goddamn right.

03:17:18.000 Abraham Langer, vampire slayer. 0.98

03:17:20.000 So, I guess we covered the UFC. I knew this wasn't going to be a UFC podcast.

03:17:24.000 We kind of did.

03:17:26.000 We watched some of the big fights.

03:17:27.000 We talked about it.

03:17:28.000 I just still don't want...

03:17:30.000 I want to know...

03:17:30.000 That's hilarious.

03:17:31.000 D'Elia sent me a text, totally unrelated.

03:17:35.000 Like, didn't know that we were doing a podcast.

03:17:37.000 Probably didn't know we were even talking about him.

03:17:39.000 And he sent me a text...

03:17:42.000 About Kelly Starrett retweeting that thing thinking it's hilarious.

03:17:46.000 And he said, guy seems cool. 0.99

03:17:47.000 I love that shit when people get jokes. 0.99

03:17:50.000 So D'Elia just sent me this. 1.00

03:17:52.000 Psychic connection, man!

03:17:55.000 But that's what's crazy is that picture that I put up was days ago.

03:17:59.000 And the fact that he said it literally texted me while we were talking about it.

03:18:03.000 That's so weird.

03:18:04.000 That is weird.

03:18:05.000 What are you going to do?

03:18:06.000 Dude, it's spooky, man.

03:18:09.000 Owned by Crystalia. 1.00

03:18:10.000 It's like fucking chemtrails! 1.00

03:18:12.000 The Earth is flat! 1.00

03:18:13.000 He got owned.

03:18:14.000 He got owned by Crystalia.

03:18:15.000 The Earth is flat.

03:18:15.000 Yeah, but Kelly's a good guy.

03:18:17.000 He's hilarious.

03:18:18.000 He doesn't take pictures. 1.00

03:18:18.000 He knows his shit, too, huh? 1.00

03:18:19.000 Well, I don't think... 1.00

03:18:20.000 I mean, he's probably in the middle of a video and someone took a still of it and used it as a photo.

03:18:24.000 Or he was like, make sure you get this angle.

03:18:26.000 He's doing, like, mobility stuff. 1.00

03:18:28.000 He knows his shit, huh? 1.00

03:18:29.000 Oh, fuck yeah. 1.00

03:18:29.000 He's the guy that came up with the idea of using those hard balls, like lacrosse balls, to loosen up muscles. 1.00

03:18:35.000 Oh, it's the best.

03:18:36.000 There's a lot of good information out there, man. 0.99

03:18:38.000 Fuck yeah, there is. 0.99

03:18:38.000 More than ever before. 0.99

03:18:39.000 I'm going to get huge with that Russian guy, and I'm going to be a fucking big leopard. 1.00

03:18:44.000 A big, supple leopard. 0.98

03:18:46.000 Yeah, well, he's all about mobility.

03:18:48.000 He's a big mobility.

03:18:49.000 It's all about having a full range of motion, flexibility, and full range of motion with all your tissues.

03:18:56.000 Nothing being tight and wound up.

03:18:57.000 So he's all about breaking up scar tissue, stretching yourself out, making sure that you're strong in all these different areas so that you don't create these vulnerable spots.

03:19:21.000 We got a guy.

03:19:25.000 I got a guy.

03:19:26.000 I got a guy. 1.00

03:19:26.000 We'll fuck you. 1.00

03:19:27.000 He kissed the guy in the face right before he stabbed him in the neck. 1.00

03:19:30.000 What a gem of a person wandering around Germany.

03:19:33.000 Sweetie.

03:19:34.000 Yeah.

03:19:34.000 He needs to dress him up like a...

03:19:36.000 Just die. 1.00

03:19:37.000 We're all gonna die. 1.00

03:19:38.000 We gotta get him on the show. 0.99

03:19:39.000 Dress him up like an infidel. 1.00

03:19:40.000 Send him into the Muslim neighborhoods. 1.00

03:19:42.000 For reals. 1.00

03:19:43.000 This fucking podcast is over! 1.00

03:19:47.000 TFATK.com. 1.00

03:19:48.000 Brendan Schaub on Twitter.

03:19:51.000 Brian Callen with a Y on Twitter. 1.00

03:19:53.000 And see you fucker soon. 1.00

03:19:56.000 Thanks everybody. 0.99

03:19:57.000 Bye.

03:19:57.000 Oh, I'll be back tonight.

03:19:58.000 Podcast at 9pm with Bobcat Goldwaite.

03:20:01.000 Just back from a Bigfoot convention.

The Joe Rogan Experience - May 16, 2016

Joe Rogan Experience #799 - Brendan Schaub & Bryan Callen

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Summary

Transcript