This Past Weekend with Theo Von - E373 Tony Hawk & Jason Ellis

00:00:00.200 Today's episode is brought to you by Liquid Death.

00:00:03.700 I want to let you know we got new Be Good to Yourself colorways.

00:00:07.800 Merch available now.

00:00:09.640 Hoodies, crewnecks, and tees.

00:00:11.840 Also available is the I'm Upstairs collection, baby.

00:00:16.760 Let them know where you are.

00:00:19.820 I'm Upstairs!

00:00:23.840 And the new Get That Hitter Bait and Tackle collection.

00:00:26.860 They got these hats right there.

00:00:28.260 Them brims, baby.

00:00:31.000 Catch that fish in comfort.

00:00:33.300 Check out that and more at TheovanStore.com.

00:00:37.120 That's TheovanStore.com.

00:00:41.160 I want to let you know, though, I got some new tour dates that you can check out.

00:00:46.420 And I'm grateful for them.

00:00:47.840 February 2nd, I'll be in Jacksonville, Florida.

00:00:50.960 The 3rd, St. Petersburg.

00:00:54.060 The 5th, I'll be in Orlando.

00:00:55.960 The 24th, I'll be in Lafayette, Indiana.

00:00:59.540 The 25th, Rockford, Illinois.

00:01:02.540 Home of the Rockford Peaches.

00:01:05.300 And that's America's team right there.

00:01:06.900 Female ball.

00:01:09.640 February 26th, Chicago, Illinois.

00:01:11.680 Anyway, May 6th in Tulsa, May 7th in Los Angeles.

00:01:16.820 Today's guests are a real tandem, a real duet, if you will.

00:01:23.680 They are one-of-a-kind men in their own right, and they have joined forces.

00:01:28.420 From their new podcast, Hawk vs. Wolf, they are the greatest skateboarder of all time, Mr. Tony Hawk,

00:01:36.380 and one of the most multifaceted men of all time, Mr. Jason Ellis.

00:01:43.620 Grateful to have him here today.

00:01:45.300 For me to set that parking brake

00:01:48.060 And let myself unwind

00:01:50.880 Shine that light on me

00:01:54.820 I'll sit and tell you my stories

00:02:00.520 Shine on me

00:02:05.500 And I will find a song

00:02:09.720 I'll be singing

00:02:10.940 You gotta do some of those Mexican shows, man.

00:02:22.140 The Mexican shows, like, uh...

00:02:24.860 What's that show with those four people, Colin?

00:02:28.200 Out in the valley somewhere.

00:02:29.740 It's like two Mexican kids

00:02:31.160 And a, um...

00:02:32.600 Chinese person.

00:02:33.680 You know what I'm talking about?

00:02:34.140 And a Vietnamese person.

00:02:36.300 They speak English, though, right?

00:02:37.800 Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

00:02:38.660 Everybody speaks English.

00:02:39.420 It's good.

00:02:40.700 Oh, it's like something before.

00:02:41.580 I literally did a Mexican game show.

00:02:43.720 There you go.

00:02:44.400 It was pretty insane.

00:02:45.300 Oh, there you go, dude.

00:02:46.300 That's...

00:02:46.740 They're not...

00:02:47.180 They're speaking Spanish in that, right?

00:02:48.700 Yeah.

00:02:48.860 But the whole country's a game, so you gotta jump over a wall to even get there.

00:02:51.440 It was wild, but it was like...

00:02:52.120 It was like this giant pinball thing

00:02:55.240 that you had to throw these balls down

00:02:56.800 and they bounced

00:02:57.320 and they were hitting the audience and stuff.

00:02:58.720 What?

00:02:59.080 It was crazy.

00:03:00.160 Man, I wanna do that.

00:03:01.400 Why don't they do that here?

00:03:02.520 I wanna throw giant balls at people.

00:03:04.340 It's because of the different legislation, I think.

00:03:06.780 You know, like certain countries, you can...

00:03:08.840 I mean, the rules are definitely different on who can die.

00:03:11.100 Same skate parks.

00:03:11.940 When I was a kid, they just built giant vert ramps

00:03:13.820 and put them in a fucking park.

00:03:15.120 And here, the only person that had a giant vert ramp

00:03:17.640 is some pro dude that's got all the insurance and shit.

00:03:20.740 Rich guys.

00:03:22.020 Sorry.

00:03:22.540 I didn't mean to point it at you, dude.

00:03:23.660 And you might not have any money anymore.

00:03:24.980 I don't know.

00:03:26.160 But there was a time...

00:03:27.840 I might have to sell my ramp for scrap soon.

00:03:29.460 And wouldn't it be crazy?

00:03:31.880 We walk up on him in winter

00:03:33.200 and he's like making firewood out of his last ramp,

00:03:36.240 you know, to stay warm.

00:03:37.520 That'd be a really sad day.

00:03:38.840 Nah, thanks, here.

00:03:39.560 I stay.

00:03:40.200 Oh, good.

00:03:40.900 I'm glad, man.

00:03:43.100 Yeah, thank you guys for coming in, man.

00:03:44.760 I appreciate it, dude.

00:03:45.520 It's good to see you again.

00:03:46.380 Yeah, you're good to see you, man.

00:03:46.900 And thank you for, you know,

00:03:48.500 whenever I was just really kind of catching a break in comedy,

00:03:51.920 you brought me on to your serious show a couple times.

00:03:55.300 Oh, really?

00:03:56.080 That was what that...

00:03:57.000 And I appreciate it, man.

00:03:57.040 Because I didn't realize you hadn't already...

00:03:59.500 I didn't think I had a...

00:04:00.520 I heard you on Opie and Anthony.

00:04:02.220 I told you and was like,

00:04:03.940 holy shit, this guy's the funniest guy I've ever heard on radio.

00:04:08.280 That's how long ago it was.

00:04:10.340 And I was like, get him on my show.

00:04:12.380 And then, sure enough, he just, you know...

00:04:15.280 I'm like, he didn't know it yet,

00:04:16.660 but he's like an amazing...

00:04:17.780 I was like, you could fucking take over any...

00:04:20.120 Are you saying you gave him his big break?

00:04:21.400 No, not at all.

00:04:22.540 I'm saying he was already awesome.

00:04:23.640 You're kind of saying that.

00:04:24.380 He helped hammer the crack, I think.

00:04:26.520 Everybody already knew, though.

00:04:27.860 I don't think I was...

00:04:29.080 Let me show you fucking Theo Vaughn, everybody.

00:04:31.880 Like, you were on the O&A show.

00:04:34.220 It wasn't...

00:04:35.500 You weren't...

00:04:36.500 Well, it was just Opie at that point.

00:04:38.860 Oh, sorry, yeah.

00:04:40.040 Your show had a big...

00:04:41.260 No, you definitely given me, like, a nod of confidence.

00:04:45.500 It was like, you and Simon Rex kind of did it at the same time,

00:04:48.200 and that was, I think, really helpful, so...

00:04:50.800 Well, fuck it.

00:04:51.720 So, thanks, man.

00:04:52.420 I appreciate it.

00:04:52.940 I never really kind of thanked you for that.

00:04:54.360 Wow.

00:04:55.300 Amazing.

00:04:56.780 What's going on?

00:04:57.640 So, you guys are up to this shit now, huh?

00:05:00.960 Well, we started at SiriusXM in 2004.

00:05:05.020 Yeah, before my show.

00:05:06.400 That's how I got on there.

00:05:07.200 2004, yeah.

00:05:07.780 Oh, okay.

00:05:08.720 He got me on.

00:05:09.620 Okay.

00:05:09.880 Yeah, and then we were doing that for a while, and then he went off to somewhat greener pastures

00:05:16.200 and started being the voice of the channel we were on, for the most part, and then I

00:05:19.860 kept doing the podcast, and then I was just kind of getting buried in there.

00:05:24.820 What do you think you were missing, like, when he wasn't there?

00:05:27.320 Was there something that you felt like you were missing?

00:05:30.460 Well, yeah, definitely an edgier comedy, I would say, yes.

00:05:35.580 Which wasn't good at the time.

00:05:37.720 It was pretty raw.

00:05:39.460 And I had a lot of kids listening, because it was, oh, yeah.

00:05:43.940 It was a different show.

00:05:44.040 The time was very much still skating, and we were doing video games, and they wanted to

00:05:48.700 hear about that and play music.

00:05:50.100 And then this guy would come on.

00:05:51.260 And then you bring in him.

00:05:51.580 Yeah, that's a crazy uncle.

00:05:52.520 Talk about the stripper episodes.

00:05:53.800 Crazy uncle.

00:05:54.940 I mean, kind of at that point.

00:05:56.600 He's definitely like the work release uncle.

00:05:58.800 Yeah.

00:05:58.980 Very unfiltered, but it was hilarious.

00:06:02.100 But then, like I said, they just kind of fizzled out, and then he started podcasting, and I

00:06:08.620 hit him up, and I said, maybe we should try something.

00:06:10.900 And so we started trying it, and it kind of clicked, and it's been fun.

00:06:14.200 Yeah, it feels fun.

00:06:15.200 It feels fun to watch you guys.

00:06:16.720 I'm trying to think.

00:06:17.320 When I watch, I feel like, yeah, I feel like you guys have a comfort level with each other.

00:06:24.140 There's a real earnestness that comes out of you a lot that I think creates this, makes

00:06:27.560 you kind of be the same way.

00:06:29.460 I don't know.

00:06:30.060 I haven't watched a ton, but from what I've seen, it seems like a new little, not like

00:06:35.320 a marriage, but like a new little, like, okay, it's springtime at the house.

00:06:39.960 You did give me a key to the rant the other day, and I thought it was just as good as an

00:06:44.560 engagement ring to me.

00:06:45.580 I think it's pretty special, what's happening, for sure.

00:06:48.320 To a skate ramp?

00:06:49.520 To his ramp, yeah.

00:06:50.840 Okay, so is it like in a...

00:06:52.260 You said only rich guys have their own ramps.

00:06:54.580 It's a total rich guy ramp.

00:06:55.900 And it also has a lock out front of it.

00:06:58.220 It's in a warehouse.

00:06:59.280 Oh, it is?

00:07:00.240 Although someone broke in the other night, stole some camera gear.

00:07:03.340 I thought they just skated.

00:07:04.660 No skating?

00:07:05.320 I was kind of hoping that, too.

00:07:07.080 Hey, what are you doing?

00:07:08.760 Well, you gave Ellis a key.

00:07:09.820 You didn't give me one.

00:07:11.080 It's my fault.

00:07:12.060 Somebody broke in here, too, actually.

00:07:13.860 What'd they take?

00:07:14.420 Stole cameras, yeah.

00:07:15.580 Right.

00:07:16.300 Oh, yeah.

00:07:16.860 It must be that time of year.

00:07:17.740 Maybe the holidays, people are looking to give cameras out or something.

00:07:21.400 Well, they were going around the building trying to get into different doors and finally

00:07:25.380 got into the door that just happened to be by a camera that was set up.

00:07:30.360 Oh, yeah.

00:07:30.640 That's a game show for criminals, I feel like.

00:07:32.220 They just walk into a building and it's like.

00:07:35.620 Yeah.

00:07:36.200 If he had gotten the other door open, he would have had a piece of the loop.

00:07:43.480 Oh.

00:07:44.500 The loop ramp is all set up over there.

00:07:46.760 That would have been hard.

00:07:48.320 That would have been hard to steal on a whim.

00:07:49.760 I was going to say, and what would you do?

00:07:51.480 Like, if Theo stole the loop, what would you do?

00:07:55.600 I've gotten hurt on nothing enough.

00:07:56.640 What would be the first thing that you would do with the loop?

00:07:58.680 I'd probably take it to Canada or Australia where people would freaking mount somebody

00:08:03.080 over there.

00:08:03.340 You could sell it for big money over there, I think.

00:08:05.240 But how do you get it there?

00:08:07.600 Yeah.

00:08:08.080 Shipping, I don't know.

00:08:09.000 Canada, maybe.

00:08:09.860 You could drive it through in a truck.

00:08:11.220 Yeah.

00:08:11.840 But Australia, no.

00:08:14.000 Got Hawks loop.

00:08:14.800 Can you imagine trying to get the loop?

00:08:17.480 Trying to get, just get rid of it.

00:08:19.100 Yeah.

00:08:20.040 Yeah.

00:08:20.380 That's what I'm saying.

00:08:21.300 Hey, man.

00:08:21.600 Hey, kid.

00:08:21.920 You want to loop?

00:08:22.660 Yeah.

00:08:22.920 Like, hey, kid.

00:08:23.460 You want to die?

00:08:24.220 I got the device.

00:08:26.700 Like, just set this thing up.

00:08:28.680 Go down that roll and you'll be dead in a minute.

00:08:31.020 Like, no problem.

00:08:32.120 Yeah, bro.

00:08:32.800 This path has fentanyl in it.

00:08:35.680 The suicide loop.

00:08:36.900 The loop just takes people out.

00:08:38.980 Yeah.

00:08:39.120 I mean, I did it and it was one of the most painful, terrifying experiences of my skateboard

00:08:45.540 career.

00:08:46.040 Really?

00:08:46.640 Yeah.

00:08:46.860 It was hard work, for sure.

00:08:48.020 Some people get it a little easier, but I was already on my way out doing radio and

00:08:52.060 not skateboarding all the time.

00:08:53.680 And he was like, we're setting up the loop.

00:08:55.480 And I was like, well, fuck, if you're calling me.

00:08:56.940 Yeah, that's, it's a, it's a prestige, you know, to do the loop.

00:09:00.840 I think it had only like 10 people had done it.

00:09:03.560 And I was like, well, this is an opportunity for me to.

00:09:06.020 And all Americans, all white, like whites, all women.

00:09:09.000 Who was it?

00:09:10.240 Who all had done it?

00:09:11.800 You want the demographics?

00:09:13.220 Yeah.

00:09:13.620 I just seen.

00:09:14.180 Oh, Calus.

00:09:15.060 Yeah.

00:09:15.680 I'm not judging.

00:09:16.500 I don't care.

00:09:16.780 I've never been asked that question.

00:09:19.520 Am I the first gay guy?

00:09:20.680 I'm the only, I'm the first gay loop.

00:09:23.300 Oh, yeah.

00:09:24.340 There you go.

00:09:25.160 Gay loop.

00:09:25.580 And then Lizzie Armato.

00:09:28.920 What?

00:09:29.440 Lizzie Armato was the first female.

00:09:30.740 Right.

00:09:30.960 Oh, wow.

00:09:31.600 Okay.

00:09:32.440 And then Felipe Nunez did it with no legs.

00:09:36.900 He has no legs.

00:09:37.820 Really?

00:09:38.100 That's cheating a little bit, though, don't you think?

00:09:39.400 I think so.

00:09:40.000 No, it was so hard for us to get the speed for him.

00:09:44.260 We had to build an extension on the starting ramp for him.

00:09:47.000 Look at it.

00:09:47.460 Is that it?

00:09:47.960 The actual thing?

00:09:48.800 Yeah.

00:09:49.680 What?

00:09:49.980 See, it's pretty gnarly, dude.

00:09:51.240 Like, when you get up the top.

00:09:52.080 Yeah, this one's gnarly.

00:09:52.320 This is Tom Schar got broke off here.

00:09:56.600 It's like being in the dryer for a really couple seconds.

00:09:58.940 Yeah.

00:09:59.440 Yeah.

00:10:00.540 But you can't lose where you are.

00:10:04.020 If you do that, you're dead.

00:10:05.800 What do you look at when you go into the loop?

00:10:07.340 The line.

00:10:07.700 Oh, look at the line.

00:10:08.260 He's got a line in the middle of it.

00:10:09.840 The line.

00:10:10.140 And you follow the line.

00:10:11.200 Because especially if you've got skateboarding in your background, when you get to the upside

00:10:16.580 down part, you want to look back because that's what you usually do.

00:10:20.280 You're going back in.

00:10:20.820 You're usually turning around.

00:10:21.820 Oh, yeah.

00:10:22.680 So you've got to not look back and keep looking at this line, and it just doesn't seem right.

00:10:28.560 So you want to do that little lean, and then that makes you do this twisty thing, and

00:10:33.680 you eat shit.

00:10:34.500 Well, I'm just trying to say, because now it's a lot more diverse.

00:10:37.640 When I was young, it was like white dudes who had been, who were about to fight their

00:10:42.720 stepfather were the ones who were skateboarding.

00:10:45.380 Yeah.

00:10:45.760 I hated those guys.

00:10:47.260 Yeah.

00:10:47.780 Yeah.

00:10:48.080 I got.

00:10:48.620 That's how I became me.

00:10:50.440 Are you talking about Jason?

00:10:51.060 I mean, okay, maybe.

00:10:52.020 I grew up with those guys.

00:10:53.580 I had to, like, you know, I got approval after many years of hard work and, you know,

00:10:57.460 humiliation, and, you know, they destroy you and call you a pile of shit and throw your

00:11:04.560 board in the trash.

00:11:05.560 One time I made checkers.

00:11:07.100 I tell this story, but I made checkers inside checkers with the grip tape on the board.

00:11:11.780 So it took, like, a couple days.

00:11:14.260 Oh, yeah.

00:11:14.740 You went to a lot of school doing that, too.

00:11:15.920 It had to be perfect, and I'm not very, like, good with, like, art and shit.

00:11:19.800 I got big dumb hands.

00:11:21.260 So it took forever.

00:11:22.620 So I got checkers in checkers on this board.

00:11:24.440 And I show up, like, fucking Christian Osoy boy with checkers in checkers.

00:11:28.920 I'm like, I'm the fucking sickest dude out here.

00:11:33.360 And I get on the ramp, and this dude that's now my friend, Zach Reynolds, he goes, what

00:11:38.920 the fuck is that shit?

00:11:40.240 And just grabs it off me and throws it in the trash can.

00:11:43.900 But I just grabbed it out of the trash can and kept skating, because that's how it goes.

00:11:49.080 It happened all the time.

00:11:50.160 Yeah.

00:11:50.600 And now they're nice to me.

00:11:52.940 Well.

00:11:53.320 It only took, like, 30 years.

00:11:56.600 Now it's like, man, how's it looking good in the States, Jason?

00:12:00.020 Send us a T-shirt.

00:12:01.120 I'm like, I'm not sending you shit.

00:12:04.500 Jason, get stuffed.

00:12:06.560 We had, I'm trying to think if we had a lot of skateboarding in our area.

00:12:10.200 We had one dude jumped off the Shoney's one time on a board and hit.

00:12:15.180 What's a Shoney?

00:12:16.200 It's a Shoney's.

00:12:17.040 It's like a place where you get food.

00:12:18.880 It's like a Denny's.

00:12:20.060 Yeah, it's like a Denny's, but it's.

00:12:21.260 Off the roof?

00:12:22.100 Yeah, he came down off the roof, yeah.

00:12:23.620 But he hit a Buick LeSabre.

00:12:25.840 And can you pull up a LeSabre, Daddy?

00:12:27.480 Wait, while it was moving?

00:12:29.020 No, no, no.

00:12:29.800 Still a LeSabre.

00:12:30.640 Oh, yeah.

00:12:31.260 Wait, he didn't see?

00:12:32.120 Did he not aim properly?

00:12:33.160 I think he didn't plan ahead, really.

00:12:34.760 Yeah.

00:12:34.980 Wow.

00:12:35.180 Some people think when you're going off a roof, you're going to be able to jump, but I think

00:12:38.440 the angle you're at.

00:12:39.360 Oh, I see.

00:12:39.800 He just went straight down.

00:12:40.920 Eliminates that.

00:12:41.420 He had a maroon one, too.

00:12:42.900 All right.

00:12:43.280 That's a good look.

00:12:44.740 Yeah.

00:12:45.140 Not a bad.

00:12:45.780 I mean, it was a cool.

00:12:47.300 But anyway, yeah.

00:12:48.040 He like shattered his neck or whatever, which I didn't even think you could shatter.

00:12:50.640 Like your neck's already kind of in like different pieces, I feel like.

00:12:53.720 So it's like to, you know, but they said he shattered his neck, but he wore a neck brace

00:12:56.740 forever after that.

00:12:57.680 It's an interesting theory on your neck.

00:13:00.500 Unshatterable?

00:13:01.100 Yeah, that they don't shatter because there's pieces in there.

00:13:03.940 Yeah.

00:13:04.780 That's an interesting theory.

00:13:06.320 Oh, yeah.

00:13:06.680 That's all I'm saying.

00:13:07.340 They're already perforated.

00:13:08.520 I mean, yeah.

00:13:09.360 I mean, we're not doctors on this side of the table, but what the fuck?

00:13:13.520 You can shatter.

00:13:14.620 You can shatter pretty much anything.

00:13:16.340 I don't know.

00:13:18.000 It doesn't seem like it.

00:13:19.340 I speak from experience.

00:13:20.660 It doesn't seem like shattering seems like a hard word to use for the neck, but what

00:13:25.740 is something that most people, what's the first thing most people break doing skateboarding?

00:13:31.600 Anchor rest.

00:13:32.720 Yeah.

00:13:34.100 Yeah.

00:13:34.580 Whipping off.

00:13:35.460 Put your hand down.

00:13:36.680 It's so scary.

00:13:37.680 Wheeled things have always super, super scared me.

00:13:40.020 I don't like, I don't even like being in a car if it's in neutral and it's off.

00:13:45.260 Like I don't do well on anything that has like loose, just like has the ability to be loose

00:13:49.540 under it, you know?

00:13:50.300 You're convinced it's just going to take off.

00:13:52.660 I think I just don't trust the anything.

00:13:57.340 Just me in between me and the earth.

00:13:59.740 I probably don't even trust gravity.

00:14:01.180 I'm very noncommittal.

00:14:03.540 What about this right here?

00:14:04.920 This is a fellow sent something in.

00:14:06.500 Is this decent?

00:14:07.680 What's up, Theo?

00:14:08.840 Jason and Tony.

00:14:10.560 It's Louie here from Australia.

00:14:12.200 Razorblades, baby.

00:14:13.280 What?

00:14:13.700 Just want to know what you guys...

00:14:15.860 Razorblades?

00:14:17.400 What's Razorblades?

00:14:18.220 Oh, Razorblades.

00:14:19.320 If you say rise up lights real fast, rise up lights, it sounds like Razorblades in Australian.

00:14:27.280 Okay.

00:14:27.920 Rise up lights.

00:14:29.480 Razorblades.

00:14:30.320 No.

00:14:31.040 Rise up lights.

00:14:32.680 Yeah, but I'm saying the Australian thing to see if you sound...

00:14:34.620 Oh, you're going straight to it.

00:14:35.500 Yeah.

00:14:35.720 You do Razorblades and I'll do...

00:14:37.580 Go.

00:14:38.080 Rise up lights.

00:14:39.120 Razorblades.

00:14:40.180 Rise up lights.

00:14:40.980 Razorblades.

00:14:43.600 Razorblades?

00:14:44.280 Razorblades.

00:14:44.940 Let's just keep doing that and then that's the podcast.

00:14:47.660 Razorblades?

00:14:48.340 Razorblades.

00:14:49.100 Rise up lights.

00:14:50.000 Sick, mate.

00:14:50.740 Yeah.

00:14:51.480 Okay.

00:14:52.400 Anyway, so obviously...

00:14:54.260 Theo, Jason and Tony.

00:14:56.940 It's Louie here from Australia.

00:14:58.600 Razorblades, baby.

00:15:00.080 Just want to know what you boys, Tony and Jason, what's the gnarliest injury you guys

00:15:05.400 have seen in skateboarding, whether it be professional or just down at the skate park

00:15:10.720 or on the ramp.

00:15:12.460 Anyway, cheers, fellas.

00:15:13.520 Gang, gang, baby.

00:15:14.800 Cheers, baby.

00:15:15.360 That guy's from another country.

00:15:17.140 That happens sometimes.

00:15:19.120 Well, I guess now with all the new rules.

00:15:23.500 Have people died?

00:15:27.140 Well, people have died, yes.

00:15:29.120 It's not...

00:15:30.120 I'm not...

00:15:31.120 I have not been witness to that.

00:15:33.980 No.

00:15:34.960 Thankfully.

00:15:36.420 But I...

00:15:37.760 Well, the worst that I...

00:15:38.620 The worst I had was a broken pelvis.

00:15:40.700 And I fractured my skull and broke my thumb all at the same time.

00:15:45.540 So you're going to do it big, right?

00:15:48.000 Fuck, you're half a mummy at that point.

00:15:49.740 But I was knocked out, so it wasn't like I was witnessing all this in real time.

00:15:54.820 It makes it easier, right?

00:15:55.900 What's that?

00:15:56.340 Yeah, a little bit.

00:15:57.160 But I want to say like the worst...

00:15:58.880 The worst thing you say...

00:16:00.020 I saw a dude break his arm here.

00:16:02.640 And then his arm was just dangling and like dangling behind him.

00:16:06.600 That's pretty cool.

00:16:07.320 Like it was just flopping around.

00:16:09.520 That was pretty heavy.

00:16:10.600 I smashed my...

00:16:11.460 I fractured my wrist.

00:16:13.120 I broke my wrist and I popped my elbow out of the back of my arm.

00:16:16.720 It's like compound fracture.

00:16:18.000 When I was 16 and I was about to get on a plane to go back to Melbourne.

00:16:24.720 And I was like, we'll just skate to skate park near the airport.

00:16:27.440 And then I fell.

00:16:29.460 And that thing came out.

00:16:31.500 It was good that I was young because I just went into shock.

00:16:35.260 And then they give you a whistle in Australia.

00:16:37.500 You suck on a whistle.

00:16:38.780 For what if you need help?

00:16:40.040 Nah, it's got heroin in it.

00:16:41.600 Nuh-uh.

00:16:42.120 Yeah.

00:16:43.240 What?

00:16:44.340 Yeah.

00:16:44.680 Well, whatever.

00:16:45.180 It's got morphine or whatever, you know.

00:16:46.900 Let's go, boy.

00:16:48.260 That's what I'm saying, dude.

00:16:48.800 It's got the juice in it, you know.

00:16:50.060 Yeah.

00:16:50.580 And you suck on the...

00:16:51.420 He's like, suck on the whistle.

00:16:52.920 And then you realize when you suck on it that it's got heroin in it.

00:16:56.980 And then you suck that fucker.

00:16:59.340 Oh, dude.

00:17:00.100 Yeah.

00:17:00.760 And then they take the whistle off.

00:17:02.100 You're like, nah, give me the whistle back.

00:17:03.780 I'd be a crossing guard in a half hour, dude.

00:17:06.600 I'd fucking just be bringing a fucking lord across the street, son.

00:17:10.920 Whistles are good.

00:17:11.760 Yeah.

00:17:12.240 That's insane.

00:17:13.040 I didn't have that dope whistle over there, man.

00:17:14.820 Yeah.

00:17:15.200 I've never heard of that.

00:17:15.820 Yeah.

00:17:16.160 Yeah.

00:17:16.500 Well, that's the thing.

00:17:18.020 I think it seems like you guys' dynamic is that you're going to somehow...

00:17:21.820 It would seem like you would know so much, but you're going to learn a lot from him.

00:17:26.040 Oh, yeah.

00:17:26.880 Yeah, for sure.

00:17:27.800 I just don't know if it's good or not.

00:17:29.860 No, I've got to filter which parts.

00:17:31.800 Yeah.

00:17:32.100 Yeah.

00:17:32.380 It's always enlightening.

00:17:34.420 And it's always entertaining.

00:17:36.280 Yeah.

00:17:37.580 Yeah.

00:17:37.980 And we try to keep it family-ish friendly.

00:17:42.940 Yeah.

00:17:43.340 Yeah.

00:17:43.620 I've got a Jason Ellis show to get real gross.

00:17:45.840 Oh, yeah, yeah.

00:17:46.920 There's been a couple of times where his stories went crossed over.

00:17:49.800 It's like, hey, okay.

00:17:51.320 Yeah.

00:17:51.440 You would understand like every now and then at a certain place where it might not be super

00:17:56.740 appropriate to go deep into your own head because you're pretty gross, you know?

00:18:01.600 Yeah.

00:18:02.160 I mean, I've been involved in some stuff that's probably not, you know, stuff you would talk

00:18:06.940 about with someone's mom or something if you just met their mom.

00:18:10.480 Right.

00:18:10.720 So I feel like...

00:18:11.340 We all have.

00:18:12.860 Yeah, yeah.

00:18:13.460 Yeah.

00:18:14.100 Yeah.

00:18:14.500 But that's more his brand.

00:18:15.800 Oh, yeah, yeah.

00:18:16.480 He definitely...

00:18:17.620 My penis is involved in a lot.

00:18:19.340 Yeah.

00:18:19.560 So I keep that out of the Hulk versus Wolf.

00:18:23.100 Yeah.

00:18:23.920 Yeah, it almost seems like your penis is like you're its parole officer.

00:18:27.020 That's what it sounds like a lot of times.

00:18:28.380 No, I do argue with it a lot.

00:18:29.940 Yeah.

00:18:31.360 And sometimes it feels like it's Mr. Court Dator, too.

00:18:34.480 It kind of seems like...

00:18:35.380 Yeah.

00:18:35.780 He's in trouble.

00:18:36.740 He's in trouble right now, actually.

00:18:39.180 What...

00:18:39.860 Jason, I know that you love MMA and skateboarding.

00:18:44.560 I know that that's part of your past and fighting is something you just love to do, you

00:18:48.740 know, competition.

00:18:50.740 Is there...

00:18:51.420 Was there ever a skateboarder or somebody like a ramp man or something that you wouldn't

00:19:00.700 want to tangle with?

00:19:01.700 Or that was like somebody who was like a real badass that was like, what's this dude doing

00:19:05.800 skating?

00:19:06.280 This guy should be fighting.

00:19:07.680 I never wanted to fight.

00:19:09.040 I don't like fighting.

00:19:10.620 I don't like the argument or where people are heated.

00:19:15.740 I'm not into that at all.

00:19:16.960 I've never been into that.

00:19:18.140 Like, if I have to defend myself because I've been in bad situations, so instinctually

00:19:23.320 I...

00:19:23.960 If you're going to corner me, then I'm going to go because I know what the other side of

00:19:29.820 that is.

00:19:30.240 Like, if you don't defend yourself, you just get shit kicked and I'm not going to let

00:19:33.800 that happen ever again.

00:19:34.960 Yeah.

00:19:35.220 So, there's that, but I don't like the fight-fight thing.

00:19:39.340 And in skateboarding, people are either really short or maybe tall and skinny, but it's not

00:19:46.120 a good...

00:19:46.800 It doesn't help to be kind of bulky.

00:19:49.940 It's kind of like comedy.

00:19:51.600 All right.

00:19:52.120 You know, with the holidays, I find sometimes I get discouraged.

00:19:55.720 And I'll...

00:19:57.580 You know, some people even feel depressed during the holidays and, you know, because there's

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00:21:05.620 and FaceTime with a woman, a therapist woman, and it was good.

00:21:11.000 This podcast is sponsored by BetterHelp, and TPW listeners get 10% off their first month at BetterHelp.com slash Theo.

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00:22:43.500 That's a lot of money.

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00:23:22.960 Bulky, you don't see a lot of bulky comics.

00:23:24.780 The only real one is Joe Rogan.

00:23:26.420 But he's a bit short.

00:23:28.260 Yeah, that's a good point.

00:23:29.120 He's a bit short.

00:23:29.800 Because in skateboarding, you can be a bit bulky and be his height.

00:23:34.000 If you're like 6'4 and bulky, skateboards barely hold me.

00:23:38.200 Like the tail flexes out.

00:23:40.260 If I get a little too thick, I can't go high.

00:23:43.060 You can't really get fluid style either.

00:23:46.280 Or if you were bigger and bulkier, it would feel more forced and robotic.

00:23:53.400 There was one other guy, Tom Boyle.

00:23:55.340 Ooh, what happened to him?

00:23:56.660 He passed away recently, actually.

00:23:58.620 Oh, everybody's dying.

00:24:00.100 I know.

00:24:00.460 But he was an amazing skateboarder.

00:24:04.420 He was Jack.

00:24:05.700 He was pretty thick, dude.

00:24:08.300 Yeah, I guess.

00:24:09.700 Well, Jamie Foy is breaking all the rules.

00:24:13.240 Who's that?

00:24:13.920 Jamie Foy's street skater.

00:24:15.100 Oh.

00:24:15.260 He's bigger, and he's one of the best.

00:24:18.800 Jamie Foy, bring him up, brother.

00:24:20.840 F-O-I-E, Foy, F-O-Y-O.

00:24:25.560 He's amazing.

00:24:27.840 You see him, and you're just like, that's not a typical skater.

00:24:31.280 Who's that greyhound out there?

00:24:32.660 Who's that thick daddy that's out there?

00:24:35.100 They got any big dogs that get out on the board?

00:24:37.680 There was a guy that tried to drop him in my ramp.

00:24:39.640 Yeah, I'll show you that.

00:24:40.540 If you want to see something heavy, literally heavy.

00:24:43.980 Here's Jamie Foy.

00:24:44.840 Jamie Foy isn't saying.

00:24:46.000 He's seriously one of the best skaters right now.

00:24:51.300 This guy?

00:24:52.220 Yeah.

00:24:52.680 He's not jacked?

00:24:53.960 No, not just jacked.

00:24:54.940 Just bigger.

00:24:56.680 He's a bigger dude.

00:24:58.100 There we go.

00:24:59.360 Oh, yeah.

00:24:59.900 He's a little thick, huh?

00:25:02.000 Look at that.

00:25:02.540 Oh, yeah.

00:25:05.120 He's slinging bread.

00:25:09.200 Skateboarding, I know for a fact, if you're bigger, it's the fall that's harder than you.

00:25:12.800 Yeah.

00:25:13.500 Here they come.

00:25:14.300 The heart of the fall.

00:25:14.820 Yeah.

00:25:15.900 I'd be good at skateboarding.

00:25:16.800 If I wasn't such a pussy, dude, I'd be good at it, I bet.

00:25:19.720 You think you got hand-feet coordination?

00:25:22.340 I think I would have really, if I could have really focused on it, it seems like it takes a lot of real focus in a strange way.

00:25:29.700 Yeah.

00:25:29.920 I don't know, what's the best element to be a skateboarder?

00:25:32.180 Like, what is the thing?

00:25:35.080 Never giving up.

00:25:36.260 Really?

00:25:36.960 Yeah, because you've got to do it over and over again.

00:25:38.660 Sometimes it seems impossible, but if you go enough, all of a sudden you can.

00:25:42.280 But there's so many different elements, too, that you could be good at, so you can kind of focus in on, well, I'm really good at doing these types of flip tricks.

00:25:51.420 Yeah.

00:25:51.740 And getting them into grinds and stuff, and that can just be your whole brand.

00:25:56.800 Yeah.

00:25:57.120 And then other people are like, they just fly.

00:25:59.160 They fly out of our amps, and that's their thing, and everyone loves to see them fly, and that's good enough.

00:26:05.800 Right.

00:26:06.580 Some people have a little bit of all of it, but then some are like, highlight, you know, if you look at Nigel Houston, just precision, technical, like beyond any Olympian.

00:26:16.460 Wow.

00:26:17.200 He looks like a video game.

00:26:18.620 Yeah, the stuff that's going on.

00:26:20.340 Looks like the board, when it's not with him, is still with him.

00:26:23.420 Oh, wow.

00:26:24.000 Yeah, sometimes you see people like that, that start to change the way that things are done.

00:26:27.320 Like Patrick Mahomes kind of changes the quarterback position.

00:26:30.140 You're like, oh, I didn't think that this could even be played differently.

00:26:32.960 Yeah.

00:26:33.240 And then it seems like he just plays the game differently or at a speed that looks totally new for some reason, whether it's faster or slower than what's been done.

00:26:43.620 What about that thick dog?

00:26:44.720 Who is the big dog?

00:26:45.420 He's known as Big Boy, literally a big boy, and he used to be a skater.

00:26:50.000 This is a good slam.

00:26:50.580 He grew up skating in Orange County, and he was making waves because he does a lot of weightlifting and stuff.

00:26:55.720 He's big, dude.

00:26:56.500 Oh, Jack.

00:26:57.120 He's like 360, yeah.

00:26:58.180 Yeah, crazy, like five people.

00:27:00.400 He looks like five people.

00:27:01.440 Oh, dang.

00:27:02.020 But he started to rekindle his-

00:27:04.500 Like if you had a big jumpsuit, you know what I mean?

00:27:06.020 You got five guys and just put one head at the top of it, that's what he looks like.

00:27:09.280 But he started to rekindle his skating.

00:27:10.840 He looks like a meeting.

00:27:13.380 Corporate meeting in a pajama suit.

00:27:16.500 He had a clip that went viral doing a kickflip or something or an ollie, and everyone was just like, dude, I was like, you know, and you could tell that he already had the skate skills, but he's gotten big.

00:27:26.260 Yeah.

00:27:27.700 So then he started to hit me up like, man, I want to jump in on your ramp.

00:27:30.760 And I was like, yeah, you might want to work your way up to it.

00:27:34.240 Yeah.

00:27:34.680 Because everything that I saw him riding was maybe four to five feet.

00:27:37.960 My ramp's 14 feet.

00:27:39.280 But you let him in?

00:27:40.560 Yep.

00:27:41.560 Accommodated his ass.

00:27:42.880 Yeah.

00:27:43.500 And he came in hot.

00:27:46.540 He was not going to take the time to figure it out.

00:27:49.920 He just wanted to go.

00:27:51.100 Yeah, boy.

00:27:51.760 When you're thick, I think life's short.

00:27:53.580 You gotta go quick.

00:27:54.960 Interesting.

00:27:55.840 Just look up Tony Hawk, big boy.

00:27:57.580 You got him?

00:27:58.240 Let's see him.

00:27:58.780 Oh, damn.

00:27:59.880 All right.

00:28:00.820 Yeah, dude.

00:28:01.540 Is that tattoo or did somebody graffiti on him?

00:28:03.900 That dude is humongous.

00:28:06.140 He had a nap and somebody graffitied him.

00:28:08.360 Yeah, what if somebody just tagged him up and he fell asleep in Arizona for an hour?

00:28:13.480 So, watch him.

00:28:14.180 He would not hesitate or take direction.

00:28:16.960 He just said, I'm going.

00:28:17.940 I'm committing.

00:28:19.000 What?

00:28:19.400 Oh, what happened?

00:28:20.220 That was awesome.

00:28:23.320 That was a tease.

00:28:24.380 That's how they do it.

00:28:25.700 Wow.

00:28:26.200 They did a great job.

00:28:27.340 You too, man.

00:28:28.780 Oh.

00:28:29.960 I feel taking advantage.

00:28:31.200 I almost feel like.

00:28:31.540 Right.

00:28:32.800 We fell for it.

00:28:34.160 So, this is his warmup.

00:28:35.760 Uh-huh.

00:28:36.040 That ramp's about six feet.

00:28:37.600 Not a good idea.

00:28:38.960 And I kept telling him, like, you got to bend your knees more because he's straightened

00:28:43.120 his legs too much.

00:28:44.780 Yeah.

00:28:45.280 He looks like the singer on a cruise line, kind of.

00:28:47.640 Yeah.

00:28:48.000 He looks like somebody who's waiting bar on a cruise.

00:28:50.080 And so, when he got to the top of the vert ramp, I said, all right, you just got to bend

00:28:53.240 your knees, you know, connect to the wall first.

00:28:55.040 He's like, all right, so just commit.

00:28:56.640 I said, that's not what I said.

00:28:57.720 Oh, yeah.

00:28:58.220 At all.

00:29:00.780 Oh, yes, dude.

00:29:02.760 Oh, damn, boy.

00:29:04.640 Yeah.

00:29:05.000 He's not going hard.

00:29:05.940 Oh, yeah, but it's fun to watch, though.

00:29:09.500 That's Ryan Shackler helping him out.

00:29:11.600 Really?

00:29:12.220 Yeah.

00:29:12.660 Oh, here we go.

00:29:13.480 He had everybody there.

00:29:16.720 Oh, damn.

00:29:19.120 Is it okay to laugh in y'all's world?

00:29:20.740 Oh, yeah.

00:29:21.380 No.

00:29:21.680 Oh, yeah, dude.

00:29:23.320 Wow, bro.

00:29:25.380 I like how he's arms.

00:29:26.480 Because you thought he's knocked out, right?

00:29:29.520 Yeah.

00:29:30.040 Oh, what?

00:29:30.560 I mean, that's what it looks like.

00:29:31.620 That's usually when people get knocked out a lot of times, they go stiff.

00:29:33.880 Yeah, they do the sifting, yeah.

00:29:34.640 And so, I thought that was it.

00:29:35.680 But he made some crazy sounds.

00:29:37.380 That was brave.

00:29:37.980 He just got that gingerbread bill.

00:29:39.500 He built like that little gingerbread man.

00:29:42.080 Yeah.

00:29:42.660 You know, he looks like a gingerbread man that just got out of San Quentin.

00:29:46.940 But he was super cool about it, and he's still hit me up since then.

00:29:50.360 Like, yo, man, I want to come back for it.

00:29:52.540 So, is that like your, it's almost like that's your vagina.

00:29:55.240 Like, if somebody drops in on your ramp, does it kind of have that sort of feel to it?

00:29:58.540 Like, is it like all dudes trying to get in there, I feel like?

00:30:03.300 It sounds, you know what I'm saying?

00:30:04.660 It sounds like it.

00:30:04.960 He's the only guy.

00:30:06.420 Like, nobody.

00:30:07.520 It'll be, I would come down every time if you were like, hey, I got like five guys that are all trying to come down and jump in today.

00:30:14.260 I'm like, I'll be there in a minute.

00:30:15.720 Nobody does.

00:30:16.080 I mean, there are a handful of people that come, and that's their directive.

00:30:19.160 And for whatever reason, I'll let them go.

00:30:20.900 But it's more that people want to come to skate my ramp because they skate there.

00:30:24.580 Right.

00:30:24.900 The guy that owns Liquid Death, he came.

00:30:27.500 Oh, yeah.

00:30:28.620 And he's talking, and I just met him, and he's like, yeah, we're talking.

00:30:32.760 And he's like, we're going out into the ramp.

00:30:34.660 I'm like, you're going to skate?

00:30:35.900 I didn't know he could skate.

00:30:37.380 He could skate.

00:30:37.940 He got a mini ramp at Liquid Death now, and he could skate.

00:30:40.120 Wow.

00:30:40.460 But skating a mini ramp and skating his ramp is two different things, two different animals.

00:30:45.680 And we're talking, chit-chatting.

00:30:47.220 I'm skating, and I guess he's on the deck.

00:30:49.660 And I'm like, if you're on the deck, you can skate.

00:30:51.760 Yeah.

00:30:52.580 What is the deck?

00:30:53.940 The top of the ramp.

00:30:54.780 Yeah, yeah, yeah.

00:30:55.260 So he's up there hanging out, and then I guess he'd drop in.

00:30:58.140 And I wasn't watching.

00:30:59.380 I figured everybody could drop in.

00:31:00.740 No big deal.

00:31:01.400 So I see out of the corner of my eye right when he drops in.

00:31:05.600 And he would have been so fucked.

00:31:08.860 But he-

00:31:09.500 Him hit it.

00:31:10.160 Yeah.

00:31:10.920 It was scary.

00:31:12.060 It was scary.

00:31:12.740 I just, every time I see-

00:31:14.000 I saw him the other day at Liquid Death, and I was like, dude, that drop in.

00:31:16.940 Like, I can't forget.

00:31:17.620 It was like a trick in itself, because he should have died.

00:31:19.780 What if he drowned, I always think.

00:31:21.220 What if the Liquid Death guy drowned, and it was just like-

00:31:24.020 What?

00:31:24.640 In everybody.

00:31:25.000 Like, literal Liquid Death.

00:31:26.520 And that's how he went out.

00:31:27.860 Oh, he drowned.

00:31:28.800 Yeah.

00:31:28.980 I thought you meant, like, drowned in a can of Liquid Death.

00:31:31.460 I've thought about it at least probably five, six times, I bet.

00:31:35.280 Dude, because I think, because that Segway dude went off that mountain, remember?

00:31:38.620 What?

00:31:39.300 He was stunt, and he bought the Segways, and he bought the company, and then he fucking

00:31:42.620 did one right off a mountain.

00:31:43.600 Yeah, that's true.

00:31:43.940 No, he didn't.

00:31:44.560 That's true.

00:31:44.840 Yeah, he did, bro.

00:31:45.660 How do you Segway off a mountain?

00:31:47.800 Bro, it's because you don't know enough about the vert, fam.

00:31:51.200 Wow.

00:31:51.520 You know, you got to drop in different, I think, right?

00:31:56.120 Yes.

00:31:56.880 But how many dudes are in your DMs be like, hey, let me get up in that ramp, you know?

00:32:00.480 That's what I feel like it would be all day.

00:32:02.080 But it's like I said, it's mostly people that know how to skate ramps.

00:32:05.080 Okay.

00:32:05.440 It's not just a big influx of people like, I want to jump in on that thing.

00:32:09.200 Yeah, let me hit that.

00:32:10.240 Yeah, and I've seen it go-

00:32:11.780 Yeah, let me smash.

00:32:12.460 I've seen it go-

00:32:12.520 I've seen it go-

00:32:13.040 A couple brothers be like, hey, let me smash, dog.

00:32:14.680 I mean, smash into the flat bottom.

00:32:17.620 This is insane.

00:32:18.300 They would know if you go there.

00:32:20.400 Like, you could talk, but then when you go there and stand on the top of it, you know.

00:32:24.800 You don't just, you don't let me, you don't let anybody just, no one's going to just go.

00:32:29.220 Go on, have it.

00:32:30.140 You won't go.

00:32:30.840 You heard the slow-mo guys?

00:32:32.740 Um, no.

00:32:33.480 So the YouTube show, these guys do crazy stuff in high definition slow-mo, like really high

00:32:38.300 speed cameras.

00:32:39.220 And they came and they wanted to shoot me doing a trick, which we did.

00:32:42.500 And then one of the hosts was like, hey, I want to, I want to try this.

00:32:46.360 And then that became the thing.

00:32:48.660 Clearly was not ready for it and took a slam worse than big boy.

00:32:54.420 Like his feet missed the board when he went in.

00:32:57.220 He just dove to the bottom.

00:32:58.740 Oh, there you go.

00:33:00.120 Is that, is that it?

00:33:02.000 Oh, these goons would get boiled, bro.

00:33:03.980 Look at these clowns.

00:33:08.100 So the guy on the right.

00:33:09.760 Oh, what?

00:33:10.880 They're going to do this, bro.

00:33:12.120 I think this might be the one where I'm, it's, they did, they did two segments on when

00:33:17.000 they came.

00:33:17.620 So are they really wearing those like for a joke or are they serious?

00:33:20.880 No, that's their, that's their vibe.

00:33:22.140 Okay.

00:33:22.500 Oh, bro.

00:33:23.820 I've had, I've cleared stronger things out of my throat than these dudes.

00:33:28.140 So this is, this, this video is just my trick.

00:33:32.220 So it's like super high speed.

00:33:34.020 I did a heel flip melon body barrel.

00:33:37.200 Of course, dude.

00:33:38.520 You love that trick right there.

00:33:39.960 Uh, of course, bro.

00:33:41.760 My cousin had a lobotomy six 67.

00:33:45.740 But anyway, that dude fell and he, um, wow.

00:33:50.780 That's cool.

00:33:51.660 That dude fell and broke his wrist.

00:33:54.340 Oh, sorry, mate.

00:33:55.480 And when he hit, he farted so bad.

00:33:59.000 Yeah.

00:33:59.940 No way.

00:34:00.600 That when we came to check on him, we're like, Oh, dude.

00:34:04.320 He didn't shit his pants.

00:34:05.380 I don't know.

00:34:06.060 He might've shit his pants.

00:34:06.960 I don't really don't know.

00:34:07.660 You can shit your pants on an impact.

00:34:08.920 He was so stunned.

00:34:10.220 Yeah.

00:34:10.780 He was so stunned that his homies said, Hey, did you, uh, Oh yeah, dude.

00:34:14.740 I shit.

00:34:15.440 I mean, I, yeah, I've shit off way less than this.

00:34:18.800 Oh, yes.

00:34:19.720 Oh dude, come on.

00:34:20.640 You can just tell this is not going to work.

00:34:23.200 Right?

00:34:23.560 Like, don't do it, dude.

00:34:26.220 Oh God.

00:34:27.680 He's, oh man, he's too, he knows.

00:34:30.520 He's already stalled too long.

00:34:31.980 He knows.

00:34:32.420 Oh, oh, oh, oh.

00:34:33.900 Oh.

00:34:35.660 And he broke his wrist.

00:34:36.820 And he farted the whole time he was farting.

00:34:39.940 Kid, could you hear it or not?

00:34:41.280 No, no.

00:34:41.620 When we walked over to him, it was like, Oh, dude.

00:34:44.380 Dude, he shit his pants.

00:34:45.680 That's the last healthy part of him being like, I'm out of this fucking clown.

00:34:49.640 That's the ghost of his manliness flying out of his ass, bro.

00:34:54.060 If you fucking cooked out like that, dude.

00:34:56.420 All his heart and courage is in his pants right now.

00:34:59.480 They're like, sayonara, bro.

00:35:01.380 They might have left before he hit.

00:35:03.680 He looked like he was pretty scared before he went in.

00:35:06.020 Look at you smiling, dude.

00:35:07.900 That's great.

00:35:09.560 Well, it was, you know, the whole thing was supposed to be just my trick.

00:35:12.740 And then this became the highlight of the whole day.

00:35:15.780 I love how the other dude in the lab coat doesn't even fucking help him, bro.

00:35:21.120 You can't dress like a doctor and not do doctor shit a little.

00:35:24.240 At least CPR your homie, dog.

00:35:26.860 Yeah, at least suck on his face for a second.

00:35:29.020 Fucking bring him back to life, dude.

00:35:31.800 They got to try it again.

00:35:32.900 They need to do a rebuttal or whatever it's called.

00:35:34.340 He didn't come back?

00:35:35.440 Did anybody ever think you're Daniel Tosh ever?

00:35:38.380 No.

00:35:39.080 Somewhere?

00:35:39.800 No.

00:35:40.900 Tom Green.

00:35:41.640 I used to get Tom Green.

00:35:42.440 When Tom Green's show was big on MTV, people would think I was Tom Green.

00:35:46.600 Oh, that's interesting.

00:35:47.680 Yeah.

00:35:49.180 So what else was I thinking about, dude?

00:35:52.060 Who do people think you look like?

00:35:53.980 I used to get Tom Brady when I was a little bit younger.

00:35:56.640 And then now, nobody really.

00:35:59.260 Just you?

00:35:59.980 Yeah, just me or just they don't know who I am.

00:36:02.560 All right.

00:36:04.180 Hey, what's up?

00:36:04.720 This is Josh from Toronto.

00:36:06.060 I'm just wondering, this is a question for all of you guys, whether you had any superstitions

00:36:13.720 that you needed to do before performing, especially early on when there was low stakes.

00:36:22.600 Sometimes our anxiety makes us want to be in control and superstitions are a way of controlling

00:36:29.000 things in the periphery of uncontrollable situations.

00:36:32.740 I don't know if that's true.

00:36:34.480 I made that up on the spot.

00:36:36.040 Okay.

00:36:36.940 Thank you for your time, gang gang.

00:36:39.980 Damn, dude.

00:36:41.560 What?

00:36:42.220 He's getting deep.

00:36:42.900 He could be smart.

00:36:44.700 Are you superstitious?

00:36:45.920 Is that what the question was?

00:36:46.960 Yeah.

00:36:47.160 I used to have, I guess I had little things I did, but like I put all my pads on left side

00:36:54.580 first.

00:36:55.140 Yeah.

00:36:55.900 I used to be crazy superstitious.

00:36:57.500 And then when I got let go from serious, I decided that all my-

00:37:02.960 That didn't work.

00:37:03.780 Yeah.

00:37:03.960 That all my superstition things obviously didn't fucking work.

00:37:06.740 So, cause I wouldn't walk on cracks on the street.

00:37:09.220 I used to dodge cracks for like 10 years.

00:37:12.780 Damn.

00:37:13.080 And then, and then I just decided when I got, when I got fired that I was going to-

00:37:18.060 None of it matters.

00:37:18.760 I was going to step on cracks.

00:37:19.980 I go underneath fucking, I go underneath ladders and shit.

00:37:23.340 Everybody can eat a dick.

00:37:24.760 I hate it.

00:37:27.540 Yeah.

00:37:27.940 I think it's funny.

00:37:28.780 I think when you are younger, you do think like maybe things like that matter, like way

00:37:32.660 in the balance, like little things.

00:37:34.220 Like I remember I used to swallow on different sides of my mouth for about maybe 15 years,

00:37:38.200 you know?

00:37:38.920 Like I would swallow like-

00:37:40.140 Even it out.

00:37:41.100 Yeah.

00:37:41.340 Just even it out.

00:37:42.120 Just to like keep the world even.

00:37:43.480 It was almost like a way of just like trying to keep the world even so that shit didn't

00:37:47.200 get too haywire.

00:37:48.120 It was like maybe a control met, a metronism.

00:37:52.060 Do you guys ever have any stalkers?

00:37:53.520 Do you guys ever have any good experience with stalkers?

00:37:56.260 I feel like both you guys have had at least one.

00:37:58.860 I don't have-

00:38:00.020 Mine are-

00:38:00.780 I'm not famous.

00:38:01.980 I like-

00:38:02.580 Like, come on.

00:38:03.780 Stalk me.

00:38:04.580 I would love attention.

00:38:06.220 I'm a fucking egotistical idiot.

00:38:09.320 Everybody fucking stalks me.

00:38:10.860 I think they stalk me and then I go, hey, you want to get coffee?

00:38:12.980 And they're like, what the fuck, dude?

00:38:14.020 You're pretty intense.

00:38:15.500 I think I'm going to stalk Tony Hawk.

00:38:16.860 I, in the 80s, in the 80s, there was a girl that paid the front desk to tell her which

00:38:27.180 room I was in so that she could get a room next to mine.

00:38:29.600 Nice.

00:38:30.100 Nice.

00:38:31.200 And then-

00:38:32.460 And then what?

00:38:33.360 But nothing happened.

00:38:35.340 She did knock on my door one time and then, like, it was sometime through the weekend.

00:38:39.720 She knocked on my door and then she did come in for a little bit.

00:38:41.800 Nothing happened.

00:38:43.160 But all of a sudden, this slamming on the door came and I guess it was her boyfriend-

00:38:48.620 Oh, that guy.

00:38:49.780 That knew the whole scoop of what she was up to.

00:38:53.560 I'm just, I'm just like, I didn't even know that this girl had already done this.

00:38:57.060 I found this out later.

00:38:58.040 Yeah.

00:38:58.180 Right?

00:38:58.660 And then the next day, I'm getting in the elevator and the dude, I didn't know it was

00:39:04.680 him because I hadn't seen him.

00:39:06.140 And y'all got in the-

00:39:06.820 He gets in the elevator and he looks at me and he's got a cast on.

00:39:09.880 No.

00:39:10.820 And why?

00:39:11.240 What happened to me?

00:39:11.940 And he's like, sorry about slamming on your door last night.

00:39:14.600 Broke my wrist.

00:39:15.400 Oh.

00:39:16.300 Idiot.

00:39:16.580 He's like, I was overreacting.

00:39:18.200 I'm sorry.

00:39:18.900 I was like-

00:39:19.580 And he apologized.

00:39:20.740 Yeah.

00:39:21.500 Well, I guess he was drunk at the time.

00:39:22.680 I feel sorry for that guy.

00:39:23.940 That was an odd one.

00:39:25.500 Yeah.

00:39:25.700 I was just sort of-

00:39:26.820 Okay, then I-

00:39:27.480 I feel like, yeah, what you got?

00:39:29.040 You got one now?

00:39:29.380 I kind of had that then.

00:39:30.400 Yeah.

00:39:30.820 Because girls will try and sleep with me and usually they just can and it's fine.

00:39:36.180 But one time at Alice Mania, they had this fight called the strip fight where every 30

00:39:42.240 seconds, we decide who won the 30 seconds and the person that loses takes an item of clothing

00:39:48.640 off until they're down to a G-string in pasties.

00:39:51.740 Yeah.

00:39:52.100 So I just go, regardless, I go, you lost, you lost, you lost, you lost.

00:39:57.240 Right.

00:39:57.680 Now you're both naked, fight.

00:40:00.040 Yeah.

00:40:00.560 So then they fight and that's kind of the thing.

00:40:02.500 So one of the people, you know, DM me that I get fighters, you're not allowed to know

00:40:07.800 how to fight.

00:40:08.400 That's the whole point.

00:40:09.680 You're supposed to, I'm terrified.

00:40:11.560 What is it like to fight?

00:40:12.540 And I go, I'll hook you up in a fight where you get a real fight, but you're not going to

00:40:16.360 get really hurt.

00:40:17.300 Okay.

00:40:18.080 Joe Rogan might disagree, but it's a couple of shots.

00:40:20.760 Yeah.

00:40:20.940 And if you look like you're in trouble, we just call it.

00:40:23.700 We don't let you like bleed.

00:40:25.560 Really cook out.

00:40:26.400 Yeah.

00:40:26.540 You can't be grilling them out.

00:40:27.740 Right.

00:40:28.080 So this girl's nice enough.

00:40:29.580 She does the fight, awesome fight.

00:40:31.780 She looks great.

00:40:33.020 She's got a, what I assume is a boyfriend, but it's like everyone has this, you're allowed

00:40:39.000 to bring a coach or whatever, or just a plus one.

00:40:42.440 So you don't feel.

00:40:42.660 She's got a man over there helping out, a little leader.

00:40:44.620 Yeah.

00:40:44.920 So there's an after party and I got this big room with all this bullshit at the Hard Rock

00:40:49.120 and she's hanging out and she's asking if she can sleep with me.

00:40:54.340 And who's she asking?

00:40:55.900 Me.

00:40:56.540 And I go, well, Katie, my wife, I go, she wants to sleep with me.

00:41:01.700 She's like, yeah, whatever.

00:41:02.400 And I go, what about this guy?

00:41:05.580 Who's this guy?

00:41:06.740 She goes, it's just my coach.

00:41:08.480 And I go, oh, well then, okay, no problem.

00:41:10.720 And then she's hanging out and I look at him and I'm like, he is obviously bummed.

00:41:15.980 And I go, hey, man, what's going on?

00:41:18.060 You all right over there?

00:41:19.160 He's like, yeah, you know, she's just, you know, been going out with each other for like

00:41:23.860 some amount of years.

00:41:24.920 And I'm like, what?

00:41:26.140 We broke up.

00:41:27.500 I'm like, but you're, I'm like, I'm so out of this.

00:41:30.000 You guys need to.

00:41:31.160 Spend time together.

00:41:32.140 Go.

00:41:32.740 Get him a little gift certificate or something.

00:41:34.700 I can't play that game.

00:41:35.680 But yeah, every now and then somebody just tries to.

00:41:37.700 Yeah, get him.

00:41:39.140 Well, I feel like stalkers.

00:41:41.020 Cause some of my friends always get stalkers and I'm like, damn, I can't get, I think

00:41:45.020 stalkers is more of a sex thing.

00:41:46.520 If you're good at, if you do good sex, then I think you get a stalker, you know?

00:41:51.000 You mean somebody you've already had sex with and it was so good that they just keep.

00:41:55.260 I feel like that's the only way it would make sense.

00:41:57.440 Like if you kind of are okay at sex, I don't think anybody, you know, smashing through your

00:42:01.920 windows to get back and hang out with you.

00:42:04.020 Yeah.

00:42:04.940 I thought stalkers you'd never met.

00:42:06.900 Yeah, stalkers are, I think they're a little more mentally unstable and it's not.

00:42:11.220 But something has to spark that stalk.

00:42:13.240 You got to, you got to light that.

00:42:14.480 Well, a lot of times they think that whatever, whatever art you're doing, whatever, whatever

00:42:19.420 content you're creating is speaking directly to them.

00:42:22.220 Oh.

00:42:22.480 I mean, that, that seems like the more scary stalker, not, Hey, I like you and I'm trying

00:42:28.780 to get to you.

00:42:29.740 I, I, I, well, I guess I had a girl who left her vax card on my window and it says she wrote

00:42:34.820 check me for COVID on there.

00:42:36.780 Charlotte was her name, but I never had any, but like my friends get the girls, they're

00:42:41.020 jumping over the fence or yelling, they're throwing stuff through the windows.

00:42:44.240 They're showing up at their, I feel like you're talking about groupies, not stalkers.

00:42:47.500 I don't know.

00:42:48.400 These are the ones they've had to call the cops.

00:42:50.540 Wow.

00:42:51.520 Not stalkers.

00:42:52.160 Yeah.

00:42:52.480 So really, but I think they got to be sexually motivated.

00:42:55.980 I don't think anybody's fucking smashing through your living room window to fucking come watch

00:43:00.320 an episode of a Dexter new blood or something.

00:43:02.920 You know what I'm saying?

00:43:03.260 Like, I think you got to have like a real, you got to have fused them up with some cop.

00:43:08.180 It's an interesting theory.

00:43:09.320 I think.

00:43:10.460 Cause now I feel like any guy that's like a super fan kind of wants to have sex with

00:43:14.980 me.

00:43:15.600 It's getting to that point.

00:43:16.720 It feels like a lot of, Oh, some fans would let you, would let you have sex with their males

00:43:20.820 even.

00:43:21.100 Who's do you think somebody's super famous?

00:43:23.580 Like a guy?

00:43:24.300 Cause I always said, if let's say if I wasn't a part gay, I would, I would like blow David

00:43:30.540 Bowie before he died.

00:43:32.260 Yeah.

00:43:32.700 Yeah.

00:43:32.760 Yeah.

00:43:32.940 Yeah.

00:43:33.060 Yeah.

00:43:33.140 Pre-death.

00:43:33.720 Yeah.

00:43:34.320 And I wouldn't say that would make me gay.

00:43:36.500 Would you act out blowing him even though he's deceased?

00:43:39.580 Would that?

00:43:40.000 What?

00:43:40.180 Like ghost blowing?

00:43:41.020 Yeah.

00:43:41.480 No.

00:43:42.360 I feel like it's close.

00:43:43.340 I feel like kissing people and sucking dick is a gay look.

00:43:46.160 We're killing time here.

00:43:48.040 That's what we're doing, man.

00:43:49.560 Oh my.

00:43:51.120 You know the dude who is standing on the ramp just like this for a while?

00:43:55.280 That's what we're doing, bro.

00:43:57.200 We're just trying not to freaking shit our pants in a minute.

00:44:01.780 Um, what else was something fun that I want to ask you guys?

00:44:06.080 Here's a beautiful question right here by some hard young male.

00:44:11.120 Hey boys.

00:44:12.200 Greetings from, uh, Vista.

00:44:14.440 Had a quick question for Jason here.

00:44:17.320 You know, I've been listening to you since I was a little kid in the back of my mom's Honda

00:44:20.820 Civic ever since the days of your beef with LL Cool J.

00:44:25.220 It was funny.

00:44:26.420 But Jason, I was wondering, you know, someone who's grown up around with a family with a lot

00:44:30.140 of addiction, you know, I, uh, I was curious cause you're now very open about your sexuality

00:44:34.900 at this point.

00:44:35.980 And I've always wondered, you know, do you think that, that, that drugs were more of an

00:44:39.460 opportunity for you to unlock something that was always inside of you?

00:44:42.920 Or do you feel like, you know, kind of the extremes of your sexuality have been part of

00:44:47.940 lusting after a different high and without drugs, do you think that you'd be the same

00:44:52.840 person that, that you are sober now today?

00:44:55.200 Or do you think that was always kind of a part of you?

00:44:57.260 Um, and that's a lot, right?

00:45:01.180 Let's start there.

00:45:01.760 Can I just answer the first one?

00:45:02.820 Yeah.

00:45:03.800 Um, I don't think I'm bi because I did drugs.

00:45:08.780 I think I definitely did.

00:45:11.340 When I did drugs, it helped me, uh, do things that I was scared to do for sure.

00:45:16.960 When it came to that, you think there's a man, cause a lot of drug, drug induced homosexuality

00:45:21.780 in my area.

00:45:22.560 Yeah.

00:45:22.720 That's what I thought I was.

00:45:23.700 Cause I did so many drugs.

00:45:24.880 I was like, you just, you're not gay.

00:45:27.060 You just like did like eight molly pills and you'll let anybody blow you.

00:45:31.380 That doesn't make you gay.

00:45:32.520 Yeah.

00:45:32.760 Yeah.

00:45:33.600 Yeah.

00:45:33.960 Cause a lot of, you'd see a lot of gay men meet up behind the rest area in our town and

00:45:38.080 they would do drugs and then get involved in the sexual activity behind the rest area.

00:45:44.180 And people would actually shoot these potato guns at them.

00:45:46.600 They had like, uh, cause it was a river.

00:45:49.320 There was a river right there.

00:45:50.540 And these two guys across the river would, you know, not if they were not, it doesn't

00:45:53.780 sound like the spot to go just to break them up.

00:45:56.860 Yeah.

00:45:57.020 It was like a warning shot.

00:45:58.000 Yeah.

00:45:58.120 It was all warning shots, but, um, it was like, yeah.

00:46:01.320 Cause I guess they were just alarmed if there was like drug induced homosexuality.

00:46:05.360 That's what I think people were alarmed at.

00:46:07.220 I mean, people potty, man, but yeah, that's what I'm saying.

00:46:09.820 Or maybe they're just trying to be uninhibited.

00:46:11.740 Maybe.

00:46:11.960 I was going to say.

00:46:12.680 Just trying to, you know, get, get away from their inhibitions and just like, oh, straight

00:46:19.020 people when they get really hot.

00:46:20.420 Yeah.

00:46:20.600 That was a different time when that was going on.

00:46:22.480 But now, yeah, I think like, yeah, cause drugs will just make you a little more brave.

00:46:26.260 I think almost to do anything sometimes.

00:46:28.040 Yeah.

00:46:28.540 And especially if you're really clowned out, dude, you'll fucking, you'll try and eat your

00:46:32.420 own ass.

00:46:33.060 My uncle.

00:46:33.640 He's got a point.

00:46:35.460 My uncle used to tell us, go look in your ass, bro.

00:46:38.800 And when we, we'd fucking be gone for like 40 minutes, dude, trying to look at our own

00:46:42.540 ass.

00:46:43.620 You know?

00:46:44.300 It's a weird thing.

00:46:45.020 I remember the first time I shaved my ass and it was like trying to find my hole in the

00:46:48.880 mirror.

00:46:49.300 And I was like, I was like, wow, I feel slightly like less confident in myself by looking at

00:46:55.200 myself from this angle.

00:46:56.780 Oh yeah.

00:46:57.220 But eventually you get, you know, cause that's, that's your ass.

00:46:59.940 You better live with it.

00:47:00.860 You know?

00:47:01.740 Staring in your ass.

00:47:02.660 I think it does weaken you.

00:47:04.260 Yeah.

00:47:04.480 See, I, see, I think it, I think it does at first, but for me, cause at first I felt

00:47:09.760 the same thing.

00:47:10.420 Now it's empowering.

00:47:10.920 Same as when my, it is.

00:47:12.920 It's empowering.

00:47:13.320 It is.

00:47:13.720 Own your ass.

00:47:14.780 Own your hole.

00:47:15.660 Own your hole.

00:47:16.300 There you go, baby.

00:47:17.360 Yeah.

00:47:17.600 I believe in my hole.

00:47:18.800 I love that man.

00:47:19.700 Own your hole, man.

00:47:20.420 We're going all the way.

00:47:21.400 Praise God.

00:47:22.020 Me in my hole.

00:47:25.640 I could always trust it, you know?

00:47:27.240 Yeah, yeah.

00:47:28.440 It's right behind me at all times.

00:47:30.080 At all times, bro.

00:47:31.440 When there was only one set of footsteps in the sand that was really, your asshole wasn't

00:47:35.360 with you.

00:47:35.480 It's my hole as well, yeah.

00:47:36.100 Yeah, praise God.

00:47:36.760 It's got my back.

00:47:37.360 What else could I ask you guys about?

00:47:41.840 Oh, did you guys used to do demos and stuff like that when y'all were coming up?

00:47:45.140 Like when you guys were, did you guys ever go to demos at different shops?

00:47:48.860 I'm sure you, that you probably did, Tony.

00:47:50.420 Did you do them as well?

00:47:51.340 I did them with him.

00:47:52.000 Oh, you did?

00:47:52.580 Mm-hmm.

00:47:53.060 And what was some of that life like?

00:47:54.660 Like, was it, at that time, did you guys, were you guys already kind of like popular

00:47:58.780 in that space?

00:47:59.520 Was it like, was it pretty, yeah, just what was that like, I guess?

00:48:04.240 Done it in every version.

00:48:05.340 So, I've done them where no one knew about skating, cared about skating, and then they

00:48:10.760 put a half pipe up in a parking lot, and people are just like, what the hell is that thing?

00:48:13.980 Yeah, yeah.

00:48:14.620 And then done it where it was wild, and thousands of people, and stadium shit.

00:48:20.900 Yeah, stadium type stuff, and then when things kind of went south again, especially in the

00:48:26.300 early 90s, we were doing demos in parking lots of skate shops or sporting goods stores,

00:48:33.240 and they would just put stuff up.

00:48:36.280 So, here's a box, and here's a jump ramp.

00:48:39.400 Go ahead.

00:48:40.780 And then, you know, 50 people are watching, and we're trying to get, we're trying to get

00:48:46.320 like 300 bucks from the shops so that we can get a hotel room and get an open mic.

00:48:51.520 It's almost like open mics are comedy, kind of.

00:48:53.340 Yeah.

00:48:54.080 Yeah, but we were on tour, so we did have to survive.

00:48:57.240 Open mic is more humiliating.

00:48:58.660 As a guy that's trying to do stand-up, it is way, it's way harder mentally, like skateboarding,

00:49:05.180 even when you're, because I've sucked at skateboarding and been in a demo in a contest.

00:49:09.000 I know what it's like to be the shit guy on the ramp.

00:49:11.960 I don't even know where I stand in comedy.

00:49:14.020 I don't give a shit if everyone came just to see me.

00:49:16.440 I'm shitting myself.

00:49:18.080 Yeah.

00:49:18.420 I don't know what it is, man.

00:49:19.780 I can talk in front of thousands of people, but stand-up, I've never been more nervous in

00:49:24.260 my fucking life.

00:49:25.300 Wow.

00:49:26.740 That's why I'm attracted to it, because I'm trying to figure out what that is.

00:49:30.460 I had the greatest, I'm only done a little bit, but I did a set with Ryan Sickler, and

00:49:34.900 it was 500 people in a proper place, and I'm like, I'd never done a proper place.

00:49:39.660 And right before I went out, I was like, note to self, my knee is shaking.

00:49:44.300 I'm like, why is your knee shaking?

00:49:46.760 Are you cold?

00:49:48.000 I was like, I think I am, but I might be getting hypothermia.

00:49:50.460 And I'm like, everyone else has got a t-shirt on.

00:49:52.500 What is your deal?

00:49:54.140 And I'm like, after I was done, I was like, yeah, cool.

00:49:57.280 Wow.

00:49:57.940 But what the fuck was that?

00:50:00.840 I've had fights.

00:50:01.660 I fought Shane Carman.

00:50:02.460 I was like, man, this is a bad idea.

00:50:03.760 I feel real nervous.

00:50:05.340 That was way more nerve-wracking.

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00:53:45.180 Is there a different kind of nerves then?

00:53:47.420 Can we think about that for a second?

00:53:49.420 Because, yeah, what are those different nerves?

00:53:51.520 Was one nerves different than the other?

00:53:53.080 Like the nerves of going, like does it feel different?

00:53:56.180 I'm just trying to think while I'm talking about it.

00:53:57.320 Well, it's nerves of pain because if you don't do the trick right,

00:54:00.140 you're going to get really hurt.

00:54:01.520 So that's a nerve.

00:54:03.720 That's a nerve I have if I'm on a skateboarding rink.

00:54:05.600 But if we go do demos, there are things that we know we're capable of

00:54:09.480 that are tried and true, that are like sort of playing the hits.

00:54:13.580 So we're going to go there and be like, all right,

00:54:15.180 no matter what I'm going to leave here

00:54:17.380 and people are going to think I'm good at skateboarding,

00:54:19.480 pretty good at skateboarding.

00:54:20.720 But when he's doing something new like comedy, he doesn't know.

00:54:25.080 There's no standard set for him.

00:54:26.560 But is there something that you get nervous at that like –

00:54:30.980 I'm just trying to equate like if I'm on a skateboard ramp,

00:54:33.880 I can feel that right now.

00:54:34.960 I get real scared of heights being higher than I should be for myself.

00:54:39.560 And so that fear gets – I feel like it's in my stomach more and in my body.

00:54:47.220 That's definitely my body.

00:54:48.480 Whereas if I'm going out to do comedy or doing something like –

00:54:52.160 karaoke makes me so nervous, right?

00:54:54.560 I'm trying to think of where that fear is.

00:54:56.320 I guess it's more like –

00:54:57.460 It's because you can't sing, right?

00:54:58.300 Yeah, and it's more in my ego.

00:54:59.660 I feel like a lot of my fear from there comes in.

00:55:01.700 But what about when you started comedy?

00:55:03.240 Were you really nervous when you started?

00:55:05.820 Yeah, I think I was – yeah, I was definitely nervous.

00:55:08.040 Okay, so was there a period of time where every time before you went up,

00:55:11.540 you were like, fuck, I hope this works out?

00:55:13.540 Yeah.

00:55:13.960 Okay, good.

00:55:14.760 Yeah.

00:55:15.120 But there are still times when I go in front of a crowd

00:55:18.320 and it's a new ramp or whatever.

00:55:21.100 And I am so nervous because I don't have the confidence that maybe it's my ramp

00:55:25.540 or because the crowd's way bigger and louder than I imagined.

00:55:29.580 And all of a sudden, my body won't work the way that it should.

00:55:35.180 And I'm bailing stuff that I can do in my sleep.

00:55:38.620 And that's when I have to reassess and try to do even exercises where it's like,

00:55:44.400 come on, just snap into being normal.

00:55:47.020 See, his demo is different than – because I've done demos with him.

00:55:50.360 Yeah.

00:55:50.620 And there's 20 of us sometimes, all like the best dudes in the world.

00:55:55.560 But it's like 5,000 people.

00:55:58.600 4,500 people are looking at everything he does.

00:56:01.700 Oh, yeah.

00:56:02.440 And you can tell.

00:56:03.720 You know, like he'll drop in and it's like, ooh, you feel –

00:56:06.740 so I feel like the pressure.

00:56:08.520 Because I'm there and it's like, oh, that guy, Tony Hawk's friends, all right?

00:56:11.780 You know what I mean?

00:56:12.000 Or he fucking sucks.

00:56:13.340 Either way, you didn't care.

00:56:14.540 Who am I?

00:56:15.040 But not him.

00:56:17.260 You all know.

00:56:18.540 But I guess sometimes that gets the best of me.

00:56:20.680 Right.

00:56:21.860 Usually I can overcome it.

00:56:24.140 But sometimes it does.

00:56:25.320 And it doesn't last long.

00:56:26.460 I've never done a demo where I felt like I couldn't figure it out the whole time.

00:56:32.360 Did you – at any point, like, did your –

00:56:36.900 was there a part in your career where your ego started to get big?

00:56:39.360 Like you felt that going on in your world?

00:56:41.160 Like I've noticed that in my own life at times where your ego –

00:56:43.600 because it's kind of like this plant that gets watered by –

00:56:46.700 not even you watering it, you know?

00:56:48.140 It's this thing that grows sometimes.

00:56:49.520 Did you ever have any –

00:56:50.380 I would say more in the, like, mid to late 80s

00:56:54.660 when all of a sudden we were thrust into stardom

00:56:58.940 and in a thing that we never imagined we'd be famous at

00:57:02.860 because no one was famous at it.

00:57:04.680 And then all of a sudden we're traveling the world and there's crowds

00:57:07.180 and then that definitely gets to you

00:57:10.060 when you're at such an impressionable formative age.

00:57:13.600 So when I'm, like, 18, 19, traveling the world, thousands of people,

00:57:17.720 autographs, you know, parties, girls, everything,

00:57:20.920 and it was just like at some point I think that I took it for granted

00:57:25.200 and maybe even expected it.

00:57:27.600 And then it was all taken away from me because skating died.

00:57:31.340 And now that I get to live through another wave of success,

00:57:36.660 I don't take any of it for granted.

00:57:38.440 And I'm just so thankful that I even get paid to do it at all.

00:57:42.640 So I'm glad I went through that.

00:57:44.500 Yeah.

00:57:44.940 When, like, with ego, do you think it, like –

00:57:48.840 do you think it's just something that happens to people?

00:57:51.140 Because that's an interesting experience that you've had

00:57:52.880 where you got to, like – you know, you just got to have, you know,

00:57:56.620 popularity and stuff like that.

00:57:57.880 I feel like the people who have the worst egos are the ones that get into it

00:58:02.820 for those motivations.

00:58:04.420 They get into it for fame or fortune, and then when they finally get it,

00:58:08.580 they just expect it.

00:58:10.640 And maybe that'll last for a little bit, but at some point, people are over you.

00:58:15.520 Yeah.

00:58:15.840 If you're walking around, like, you deserve all of it.

00:58:18.580 They had a plan.

00:58:19.360 It was a secret plan to be an asshole the whole time.

00:58:22.220 Oh.

00:58:22.980 Yeah.

00:58:23.160 That's what it looks like.

00:58:24.160 Yeah.

00:58:24.540 Because some people are just like, I knew you before you were that.

00:58:28.600 Right.

00:58:28.960 And now we're still on the same fucking planet, dude, with the same skin on,

00:58:33.800 and you're acting like all of a sudden you're made of fucking diamonds.

00:58:37.120 But you do see those same people lose their motivation,

00:58:41.480 and they don't keep their skills up.

00:58:43.740 Because it was never there probably to begin with in some sense.

00:58:46.300 Or it was there, but the motivation was just to get to this point of celebrity.

00:58:51.920 And when they get to that point, they're not motivated to get better,

00:58:55.400 and that's when they fall off.

00:58:57.140 Wow.

00:58:57.440 And so in my case, I just want to keep getting better at skating.

00:59:01.100 Thank God that was there for you then.

00:59:02.840 Just because it's like that kind of stuff can happen.

00:59:04.740 And it's like sometimes I think it happens, and people don't realize it until years later.

00:59:08.180 What was even going on?

00:59:09.540 If you realize it at the time, you'd probably stop.

00:59:12.960 Like what do you mean?

00:59:13.960 Like if you're being an egotistical shithead, and you're not appreciating where you are,

00:59:18.660 and you realize it right there and then, then hopefully you would stop

00:59:22.680 or get on the right track or try to get on the right track.

00:59:27.340 I've done it.

00:59:27.880 I did it with the radio.

00:59:29.120 Skateboarding, I was famous.

00:59:30.200 Not as famous as him, but famous enough to be an asshole and fly around the world

00:59:34.540 and be like, ah, it was nothing.

00:59:36.520 I wasn't like on purpose mean, but I was definitely like not appreciative of the people

00:59:42.100 and all the life that I was living.

00:59:44.960 Just like no thank yous.

00:59:46.300 Just fucking give me the shit.

00:59:48.080 Give me the money.

00:59:48.960 Apple juice.

00:59:52.140 And then the radio, same thing.

00:59:54.520 Yeah.

00:59:54.800 I didn't, it was accidental.

00:59:56.660 Got real big.

00:59:57.400 Like all of a sudden people are all up my ass.

01:00:00.440 And then I'm straight back into that thing, running everybody.

01:00:02.880 I know what I'm doing.

01:00:03.720 Fucking nobody knows anything.

01:00:05.460 And then I had to, you know, go to, that's when I started going to therapy and shit.

01:00:09.060 Cause I couldn't have a relationship.

01:00:10.640 Yeah.

01:00:11.000 Like I could be the boss of a show, but nobody would date me.

01:00:13.560 Oh dude, that's where I'm at.

01:00:15.840 Really?

01:00:16.300 Yeah.

01:00:16.820 I could be, yeah.

01:00:17.380 Nobody will date you because you, what do you snap on people or something?

01:00:19.500 No, people can date me.

01:00:20.400 I just have trouble like with commitment and stuff like that.

01:00:22.920 Like I've just been, and I've just been, I've just had so much anger and I don't

01:00:26.020 know what I'm angry at.

01:00:27.400 That, that is, I know exactly what that is.

01:00:30.380 Oh, it's fucking miserable.

01:00:30.760 Being super angry and not knowing why.

01:00:32.900 That was the thing that made me go.

01:00:34.360 Cause I was, I had everything.

01:00:37.340 I was like, I have everything that I'd ever want.

01:00:39.200 Like you're on fire and all you do is fucking talk about dicks and then you go home and

01:00:44.260 do whatever you want.

01:00:45.140 Like this is no.

01:00:46.440 And what was your other job?

01:00:47.600 I was a skateboarder.

01:00:48.480 Yeah.

01:00:48.720 Like, come on.

01:00:50.320 I can't get a better life.

01:00:52.640 And you're just, or, you know, man, I really just want to listen to some dark metal by

01:00:56.440 myself and think about pulling things apart.

01:00:58.820 Like what's wrong with you, dude?

01:01:01.000 Oh, I'll go get those chickens at the store and just take them apart.

01:01:05.420 Wait, are they cooked?

01:01:06.480 Huh?

01:01:07.380 Oh yeah.

01:01:07.840 They're cooked.

01:01:08.260 They're pre-cooked.

01:01:08.880 Yeah.

01:01:09.160 Do you eat it when you pull it apart?

01:01:10.300 Oh fuck it.

01:01:11.040 Or do you just leave it?

01:01:12.200 Creep bro.

01:01:13.220 But I put on.

01:01:13.660 What do you mean?

01:01:14.280 You buy a chicken to pull it apart.

01:01:15.860 I'll put on some Elliot Smith or some sad music and just fucking carve that bitch up.

01:01:19.780 Do you eat it as well or are you just carving?

01:01:22.180 I'll have a little sometimes, but sometimes it's more for the sport of it, honestly.

01:01:25.260 Wow.

01:01:25.440 You know?

01:01:26.120 It's like, yeah, sometimes I just gotta let.

01:01:27.720 It's just like, I just want.

01:01:29.020 Yeah, I don't know.

01:01:29.780 I just get, I've just been angry.

01:01:31.780 And man, it's been, it has been not fun.

01:01:34.580 You know?

01:01:35.180 You should do Ayahuasca, man.

01:01:36.640 That is a unique outlet.

01:01:38.760 I've never heard of someone pulling apart chickens.

01:01:40.500 It's not a good, I feel like you could do better.

01:01:42.260 As an escape.

01:01:43.660 Yeah, it's an inner, I think when you're in a city and you don't have, you know, it's

01:01:47.280 like more of a, you know, it's, if you're in outside, you know, you're out, there's

01:01:52.960 a place where you could go do something and get a good, you know, do a weapon or something

01:01:56.700 like that.

01:01:57.060 I would do that.

01:01:58.020 Huh?

01:01:58.480 Didn't you do jujitsu?

01:01:59.520 Yeah, I'll do it sometimes.

01:02:00.380 It's been hard when I'm in LA, it's tough.

01:02:01.860 And when I'm touring, it's tough.

01:02:03.000 So it's hard to like really lock into stuff.

01:02:05.600 That's one hard thing.

01:02:06.320 It's about touring.

01:02:07.980 Um, what do you do on tour?

01:02:09.880 You could bring a jujitsu guy and mats and roll every day in your room, but that is ridiculous.

01:02:16.120 Yeah.

01:02:16.420 As I'm saying it, I'm thinking, shut up.

01:02:18.920 That's some rich guy shit.

01:02:20.340 Yeah, dude.

01:02:21.380 That's fucking rich.

01:02:22.380 He can act like it, but he's fucking funny too.

01:02:24.980 Get the fuck out of here.

01:02:25.900 I'm not fucking rich, dude.

01:02:26.800 What?

01:02:27.360 Come on.

01:02:27.740 I'm never going to be rich.

01:02:28.720 Get the fuck out of here.

01:02:29.560 I will never be rich, dude.

01:02:30.540 Based on the reaction of my kids that I was doing your show, you got something.

01:02:34.860 I don't know what it is, dude.

01:02:36.300 You're holding something.

01:02:37.240 Your kids have obviously been misled by a prominent male in their life.

01:02:41.080 Okay?

01:02:41.980 Because.

01:02:42.720 No.

01:02:43.440 No.

01:02:44.560 You're.

01:02:45.360 Fear of all.

01:02:46.380 Get the fuck out.

01:02:47.340 Yeah, my oldest son, Riley, is not here.

01:02:51.360 My stepkids are here, Miles and Calvin.

01:02:53.220 But my oldest son, Riley, said, you're doing the Yvonne, and then sent me a photo of the

01:02:56.840 shirt he's wearing, which is your shirt.

01:02:58.600 Today.

01:02:58.960 That's awesome, bro.

01:02:59.540 That happened.

01:03:00.640 That's pretty cool.

01:03:01.440 King of thing and shit.

01:03:01.980 Come on, dude.

01:03:02.440 That made my day, actually.

01:03:03.400 That's not making you.

01:03:04.100 So you at least made some royalties off that purchase.

01:03:06.700 Yeah, off that shirt.

01:03:07.540 Yeah, it's a good shirt, man.

01:03:08.980 Your podcasts are huge.

01:03:10.480 That's my brother's favorite shirt.

01:03:11.900 Yeah, man.

01:03:12.400 I mean, I do fine.

01:03:13.320 I just will never feel rich.

01:03:14.620 I don't know.

01:03:15.360 Was it more like you just never say it?

01:03:17.340 Because it sounds wrong?

01:03:18.400 Yeah, I just would never want to be rich, dude.

01:03:20.980 That fucking sounds retarded, I feel like.

01:03:23.600 Being some rich guy, I'm going to get a briefcase.

01:03:25.960 I'm going to fucking...

01:03:26.560 Why do you have to get a briefcase?

01:03:27.740 I mean, you got to do...

01:03:29.400 I'm not doing all of that shit, dude.

01:03:31.220 Can't you just have money?

01:03:31.740 You don't have to work in administration, huh?

01:03:33.580 Yeah, but I'm just not like, you know...

01:03:36.900 I'm not doing that, bro.

01:03:38.220 So do you give your money to charity or something?

01:03:40.420 We give away a decent amount, you know?

01:03:42.560 But yeah, I mean, I guess maybe I'll have some money, but I'll hopefully never be rich, like,

01:03:46.860 in my head, you know?

01:03:47.680 I think I always just looked at...

01:03:49.100 Look, I despised rich people, I think.

01:03:51.120 So I think I have some issues with it, probably, you know?

01:03:53.620 Yeah.

01:03:54.360 But what else, dude?

01:03:58.380 What about a good product?

01:04:00.720 Do you guys ever have a good product?

01:04:01.620 Here's a question right here from some white...

01:04:02.860 I thought there was going to be something on the end of that.

01:04:10.240 Just, why?

01:04:11.160 This guy knows, bro.

01:04:12.120 Look at him.

01:04:13.380 And I'm a big fan of both of you, but I have a question for Tony.

01:04:17.140 Back in 1999, you landed the 900 on the halfpipe.

01:04:22.360 I don't know if it's the only one that's been landed, but regardless of all that, the post-interview,

01:04:27.440 you said it was the best day of your life.

01:04:31.140 My question is, is there a trick that surpassed the 900 after that, or is that still the best

01:04:37.780 day of your life?

01:04:39.060 And Theo, a couple days ago, I've been rocking the mullet.

01:04:42.340 First haircut ever.

01:04:44.640 I've been getting my mom to cut my hair for my whole life, but that's the first professional

01:04:49.080 cut, and I chose a mullet.

01:04:50.180 So shout out to you.

01:04:51.260 Gang, gang.

01:04:51.860 Gang, baby.

01:04:52.420 Grow it out, baby.

01:04:53.580 Let God hang on the back.

01:04:54.660 That's a good question.

01:04:59.100 To answer his question, yes, but well, after I did 900 at the X Games, then a few other

01:05:05.300 people learned it within the same year, and then Tom Scharr did a 1080 about 10 years later.

01:05:14.240 Did it hurt your feelings when he did it?

01:05:16.200 No.

01:05:17.360 He's not that guy.

01:05:19.000 Yeah, I was that guy.

01:05:19.860 There was no way I was ever going to try that.

01:05:21.500 What I went through with 900s, and even after I made it, and some of the slams I took, after

01:05:28.340 I could do it, knowing that I'd have to try to spin another rotation, nah.

01:05:34.420 And then, let's see, 1080, then Mitchie Brusca did a 1080, then Mitchie Brusca went on to do

01:05:40.380 a 1260.

01:05:41.180 So that is the record.

01:05:44.200 No one has done a 1260.

01:05:45.920 Fuck, boy.

01:05:46.820 On Mega, right?

01:05:47.840 Mega.

01:05:48.260 Three and a half spins in the air.

01:05:49.880 On the Mega Ram, too.

01:05:51.020 Yeah.

01:05:51.200 You know what that is?

01:05:51.940 No.

01:05:52.560 It's like a 30-foot quarter pipe.

01:05:54.680 Twice as big as a Vort Ram.

01:05:56.040 Yeah, so you get more airtime.

01:05:56.980 So you're like 18 feet high.

01:05:58.560 Enough is enough, man.

01:05:59.180 Enough is enough, dude.

01:06:00.540 Enough, yeah.

01:06:01.480 But you didn't say...

01:06:02.380 But also, that thing sometimes comes back to bite me.

01:06:06.180 It was saying it was the greatest day of my life.

01:06:08.500 I was overcome with emotion.

01:06:10.420 It's supposed to be when your kids are born, right?

01:06:12.560 Did you get a check?

01:06:13.140 Yeah, well, also, my wife at the time and our newborn was right there.

01:06:18.920 So that wasn't a good look.

01:06:20.840 You got to let him live, man.

01:06:22.000 The 900 was a really big deal.

01:06:23.820 But also, I tried to defend it, which was not a good idea, too.

01:06:29.000 I meant to say it's the greatest day of my career, or the greatest day of my skating career.

01:06:33.540 But also, there was a part of me that was like, well, you know what?

01:06:35.960 I've been trying 900s for about 10 years.

01:06:39.420 I haven't been trying to have kids for 10 years.

01:06:41.100 Right.

01:06:41.300 You know what I mean?

01:06:43.560 Yeah, that's a good call, man.

01:06:44.980 It was one of the greatest days for skateboarding's life.

01:06:48.020 Like, that's how big of a deal it was.

01:06:49.580 Well, I heard about it, and I didn't know anything about skateboarding.

01:06:51.420 Right.

01:06:52.040 I didn't even believe in it.

01:06:53.360 I could tell when he did it that people that didn't skate were like, this is a big deal.

01:06:57.200 Usually, it's just us that care, you know?

01:06:59.780 Right.

01:07:00.380 Yeah, I mean, when I learned 720s, it was in 1985 on a backyard ramp in Stockholm, Sweden.

01:07:06.900 There were two people there.

01:07:08.720 No one cared.

01:07:09.380 You know, I was like, oh, that was cool.

01:07:12.020 New spin.

01:07:13.700 Yeah, but then that shit flew around the world, because there was no internet, but I heard

01:07:18.940 you did that.

01:07:19.600 Yeah, but you were also in the community, in the very small community of skateboarding.

01:07:25.900 But that one, because it was on ESPN, and because they showed it live, it just kind of went viral.

01:07:32.620 And also, yeah, I mean, the video game, too, when that popped, I mean, it was like, that

01:07:35.800 video game was almost like, it was almost like a TikTok video now.

01:07:38.860 Like, everybody can make a video game in 30 seconds on their phone, you know?

01:07:41.860 It's like, but back then, there was only a few videos that got, there was like, you know,

01:07:46.380 so a video game was almost just like a YouTube video now, in a way, you know?

01:07:50.780 It was like a way to see something different, you know?

01:07:53.800 There wasn't that many, there was television, movie, or video game.

01:07:57.800 There wasn't anything else.

01:07:58.720 It's like the hip-hop era, the gold, what is it, the gold era, where it's like, if you're

01:08:04.820 a hip-hop, if you're a big hip-hop artist in the late 80s, 90s, then you're still a hip-hop

01:08:11.600 artist today.

01:08:12.620 It's very hard to be from another generation and still be solid.

01:08:17.720 Like, he, with the video game, it's a video game that's, because there's games that were

01:08:21.960 invented 10 years ago that my kid plays now.

01:08:24.420 It's got respect.

01:08:25.940 But there's not many of those.

01:08:27.960 It's always, like, ever-changing.

01:08:29.580 Tony Hawk's video game seems like my kid doesn't, he knows what's cool.

01:08:35.000 That's usually the first thing people say to me now who grew up, you know, knowing my

01:08:40.860 name or recognize me.

01:08:43.120 If someone recognized me, that happened today.

01:08:45.240 It's like, oh, Tony Hawkman, video games!

01:08:48.440 That happened in the parking lot, actually.

01:08:49.860 I just, I went to a restaurant before I got here, and when I got in my car, this dude, like,

01:08:54.540 jumped out of his car, stopped his car, jumped out, he was like, yo, man!

01:08:57.960 And then he saw my skateboard in the trunk.

01:08:59.400 He just went like this?

01:08:59.880 He saw my skateboard in the trunk, yeah, and he's like, he's like, let me get a clip!

01:09:02.920 Do a trick!

01:09:04.140 And so I grabbed the skateboard and went down to the parking garage.

01:09:06.620 You did?

01:09:06.980 I did, because I was going to the restaurant, and I was going to skate there anyway, but

01:09:10.320 I was just like, yeah, catch me as I'm leaving.

01:09:13.520 What a guy.

01:09:14.440 Do, uh, what, um, was there any product you guys ever pushed that was kind of crazy?

01:09:19.260 Like, was there ever a product that got presented to you guys that was, like, kind of bananas?

01:09:23.300 Like, uh, that you guys ever...

01:09:25.840 Did we sell out, are you saying?

01:09:27.280 Like, Kid Rock, Kid Rock tells this story about, like, he got involved with this company called

01:09:31.760 Badass Beer, right?

01:09:33.680 And so he, like, made, like, a meal, like, and I'm paraphrasing.

01:09:37.080 He made his own beer, right?

01:09:38.100 And I think that's what it was.

01:09:39.040 It was his own beer, right?

01:09:39.900 But the second batch of it was fucking horrible.

01:09:42.740 They just cooked it too long or something.

01:09:44.160 But they still put it out, right?

01:09:46.520 Yeah.

01:09:46.740 Which was, that was not the best move, I don't think, but...

01:09:48.820 No.

01:09:49.140 So it just cannibalized the whole thing.

01:09:51.120 Everybody was like, this fucking beer is, is, is, is shit, you know?

01:09:54.900 So, um...

01:09:56.700 I worked with a company that, that I didn't realize, it was in the 80s, that I didn't realize

01:10:01.460 I had signed away my rights to them.

01:10:04.920 And I had no idea what that meant.

01:10:06.420 I was, I was, whatever, 19 or something.

01:10:08.920 And, uh, they just started making products with my name on it.

01:10:11.640 Damn.

01:10:11.860 And I finally came to them and was like, you guys, this...

01:10:14.160 Sucks.

01:10:14.880 You can't do this.

01:10:15.720 And they're like, actually, we can.

01:10:17.000 Yeah.

01:10:17.760 You know, it was more, it was more like...

01:10:19.360 It's like a cooking robe.

01:10:21.000 It was, uh...

01:10:22.280 It was a Velcro wallet, which was fine.

01:10:26.220 With, um, basically they stole the Vision Streetwear logo and it just said Tony Hawk gear.

01:10:31.160 They ripped off two people.

01:10:32.860 Yeah, and I just said, you guys, this is Vision Streetwear.

01:10:35.300 Yeah.

01:10:36.000 And they're like, yeah, well, it's, the Tri Bar logos are hot right now.

01:10:39.420 I go, yeah, but this is Vision Streetwear.

01:10:40.700 And then you're putting my name on it.

01:10:41.920 Yeah.

01:10:42.200 So it looks like I'm ripping off Vision Streetwear and I'm a skate, I'm a skater.

01:10:45.840 They're a skate brand, like, and I don't ride for them.

01:10:47.900 Yeah.

01:10:48.340 And they were just like, nah.

01:10:49.320 And while I was talking to this dude, this is a true story.

01:10:51.340 While I was talking to this dude, behind him on his shelf is a roll of toilet paper with

01:10:56.340 the same logo.

01:10:57.920 He put Vision Streetwear on toilet paper.

01:10:59.420 Tony Hawk gear.

01:11:00.480 You, Tony Hawk toilet paper.

01:11:02.300 Yeah.

01:11:02.500 And I was like, what is that?

01:11:05.060 And he goes, he goes, oh, that, oh, that's one of our, one of our retailers said, uh,

01:11:10.080 said, uh, yeah, man, we'll take whatever you got with Tony Hawk's name.

01:11:12.860 You can put toilet paper on there and it'll sell.

01:11:14.520 So we made that for him.

01:11:15.940 Wow.

01:11:16.700 And I was like, dude, I'm, I want out of here.

01:11:18.840 And I had, I actually paid to get out of my contract.

01:11:21.900 Damn.

01:11:22.780 Them T-Hawk shit tickets.

01:11:24.020 I'd take a box of them, bro.

01:11:26.600 I keep a box of them on deck.

01:11:28.640 You should keep that in your, uh, in your glove box.

01:11:30.700 We had, what was it?

01:11:32.020 And one time they had this thing, it was like hard, it was like kind of hard condoms

01:11:35.240 or whatever, I think.

01:11:35.960 And it was like, it was condoms were already a little harder than regular.

01:11:39.800 So it was like, you didn't have to.

01:11:40.720 What do you mean hotter?

01:11:41.420 Like the material?

01:11:42.500 Yeah, yeah, the material.

01:11:43.160 They help you out?

01:11:43.660 Yeah, so you didn't have to get as hard.

01:11:44.860 Built in Viagra?

01:11:45.660 Oh, what?

01:11:47.100 It's got like a spine in it?

01:11:49.300 Yeah, it's got like a little bit.

01:11:52.740 It was like called Chance condoms or something.

01:11:55.160 I don't know.

01:11:55.340 Can you pull it up?

01:11:55.900 Chance condoms or backbone?

01:11:57.620 No way.

01:11:58.920 Backbone makes more sense.

01:12:00.140 But it was like, yeah.

01:12:01.020 Were you endorsing them?

01:12:01.800 It was like, we'll meet you halfway or something was their thing.

01:12:04.540 I don't remember what it was.

01:12:05.240 Wait, you were sponsored by Halfbone?

01:12:06.540 We did it for a couple of, yeah, we did it for like four, like maybe four, uh, ad reads

01:12:11.360 or something.

01:12:11.800 It was like, yeah.

01:12:12.700 Did you never put one on?

01:12:14.420 Partially hard condoms, maybe?

01:12:16.600 Holy, no way.

01:12:17.880 Yeah, I'd go partially hard condoms, man.

01:12:21.520 No.

01:12:21.940 You guys must have the most insane search history.

01:12:24.560 And just go to images, I think.

01:12:25.720 Let's see some pics here.

01:12:26.640 You gotta judge by the, by the JPEG on this.

01:12:31.080 A little AIDS-y at the top.

01:12:33.280 Scoot down a little.

01:12:36.760 A yellow one of that that kind of slips off.

01:12:40.160 Wow.

01:12:40.680 I'm gonna have to get a hold of some if we still have any at the, at the other place, man.

01:12:45.700 But yeah, we have partial arc.

01:12:46.740 What else did we have that was bizarre?

01:12:49.440 Did you, did you deny anything?

01:12:54.060 Uh, we denied some stuff, like some sexual stuff, alcohol we don't do.

01:12:59.820 Uh, I don't know if there's been anything else.

01:13:02.960 I've seen a lot of merch, people come to my show and I'm like, oh, and I'm like, I've never,

01:13:06.960 we've never made that.

01:13:07.940 I, I, I denied a tour, there was a tour that went, went on, you probably heard about it

01:13:12.760 in Malaysia, where it was like an extreme sports tour.

01:13:15.540 Oh, yeah.

01:13:16.140 And it was, uh, it was skateboarding and BMX and maybe inlining?

01:13:21.460 Cool.

01:13:22.100 Um, and it was at a time when there was not, it was before X Games were, were big.

01:13:26.320 Yeah.

01:13:26.520 And the whole tour was sponsored by Benson and Hedges.

01:13:28.800 Yeah.

01:13:30.420 Sweet cigarettes.

01:13:31.600 And grandpa cigarettes, dude.

01:13:33.380 There were some skaters that went that were like sober skaters, you know, smoking, didn't

01:13:40.420 smoke, didn't drink and went to, and did the tour sponsored by Benson and Hedges.

01:13:44.260 I was like, you guys, how could, and they started smoking probably.

01:13:48.040 No, they didn't.

01:13:48.700 But I was, I was shocked.

01:13:49.740 Cause I, I chose not to do it.

01:13:51.120 I was like, I don't want to go to a, I don't want to have a sponsored, yeah, a tobacco

01:13:56.240 sponsored skate tour.

01:13:57.660 And it was going to be, uh, it was going to be 18 and over too, because it's sponsored

01:14:00.960 by tobacco.

01:14:01.500 So I was like, so there's always kids can't see a skate.

01:14:04.420 And so it just didn't feel right to me.

01:14:06.080 So I, I did not, and whatever, I'm not trying to say I'm holier than thou.

01:14:08.500 I just rubbed you wrong.

01:14:09.720 Yeah, no, look, we did a lot of alcohol.

01:14:11.260 But the irony about all of that was it was right at the time when all those crazy fires

01:14:15.360 were happening in Malaysia.

01:14:16.900 And so the second half of the tour got canceled because of smoke.

01:14:20.800 No.

01:14:21.620 I mean, sorry, but I saw a thick sister fight a monkey for a bag of chips in Malaysia one

01:14:25.980 time.

01:14:26.360 We were on a field trip.

01:14:27.420 Wait, it was a thing that you could watch.

01:14:29.240 She did it more than once?

01:14:30.180 No, monkeys are gnarly.

01:14:31.760 Yeah.

01:14:31.840 We went and they, I got to go later on and they come and steal your food.

01:14:35.500 Yeah.

01:14:36.020 They're gnarly.

01:14:37.180 And there was this chick out there.

01:14:38.780 Yeah.

01:14:38.860 With a big bag of ruffles on her.

01:14:40.620 And this, these motherfuckers came through, son.

01:14:42.900 Who shows up to that area with a big bag of ruffles?

01:14:45.580 Like you're asking for.

01:14:46.460 Oh, I, this girl.

01:14:47.480 I went with Riley and Riley and I were, there was this area where all these monkeys are known

01:14:51.220 to, and there was this little snack thing.

01:14:52.920 So we got chips.

01:14:53.620 And as soon as we got them, they're just like.

01:14:56.280 And they take the whole bag.

01:14:57.480 Look at this.

01:14:58.100 Beating up this white dude right here.

01:15:00.880 Monkeys love fucking chips, bro.

01:15:04.960 What's that?

01:15:08.160 No, the thing he's holding.

01:15:09.540 Is that some kind of weird cucumber?

01:15:10.280 You do not want to get there?

01:15:11.740 No.

01:15:12.160 They're crazy.

01:15:12.800 They got everything.

01:15:13.740 Dude, they're wild, bro.

01:15:14.760 I got a photo of one of them giving me like a, a look like he's going to bite me.

01:15:19.980 Yeah.

01:15:20.700 Were you at the birth of your children?

01:15:22.140 Were you, did you ever go in the room during childbirth?

01:15:24.040 That's crazy.

01:15:25.340 What?

01:15:25.960 That's crazy.

01:15:26.820 My dad said he went and watched, looked at cars when I was getting born.

01:15:31.080 But he also said that, you know, your mom got pregnant and, you know, I thought about

01:15:37.220 running, but I stayed.

01:15:40.020 So it wasn't, it was a different, different time.

01:15:42.420 Yeah.

01:15:42.660 Now, you can't not be there for the baby.

01:15:47.680 That's like, uh, unless you're divorced or in the middle of divorce, you're getting big,

01:15:53.100 like, I can't even.

01:15:54.200 You think you get queasy?

01:15:54.820 I can't.

01:15:55.240 I just don't know.

01:15:56.220 I'm wondering if it's the same type of nerves if you get, if you're dropping in on a big

01:15:59.120 ramp or something.

01:16:00.280 It's pretty scary.

01:16:01.000 I think it's a different experience.

01:16:02.520 But it is scary.

01:16:03.400 It's scary.

01:16:04.040 Yeah.

01:16:04.160 I feel like if you had more than one, then it's less scary.

01:16:07.140 Yeah.

01:16:07.240 Because the second one.

01:16:07.980 And if you have more than one, it happens real fast.

01:16:10.240 Oh, really?

01:16:10.800 Yeah.

01:16:11.120 Oh, the second one comes out quicker?

01:16:12.420 Yeah.

01:16:12.620 Oh, that first one's that real rocker, huh?

01:16:14.880 Yeah.

01:16:15.640 That first one's that real trap smasher, dog.

01:16:18.980 Yeah.

01:16:19.220 I destroyed my mom.

01:16:20.260 One time when she was real angry, she pulled her shirt up because she had, like, stretch

01:16:24.120 marks that were real bad.

01:16:25.620 Uh-huh.

01:16:25.920 And she said, look what you did to me.

01:16:28.680 And I remember, I thought they were stitches.

01:16:31.240 It looked like a shark attack.

01:16:32.740 I was like, oh, I'm so sorry.

01:16:35.520 Because apparently I was 11 pounds and I was a lazy baby.

01:16:39.040 Oh.

01:16:39.340 So I was like, I'm just chilling.

01:16:40.980 And they're, like, trying to grab on my big fat leg.

01:16:42.960 And I was like, nah-uh.

01:16:43.920 Like a beached whale.

01:16:45.240 Just beached up in a vag.

01:16:47.960 Just chilling.

01:16:49.560 Dude, I saw, I was in New York one time and somebody jumped off a building, right, and

01:16:53.360 took in their life.

01:16:54.380 And so I was just kind of meandering around just kind of seeing what was going on.

01:16:58.780 And this lady's like, you know what?

01:17:01.060 And I was like, I was like, what happened?

01:17:02.740 She's like, you want to know?

01:17:04.120 And I was like, yeah, I want to know.

01:17:05.220 And then she pulled up her dress, right, and said that the guy jumped off the building

01:17:10.560 and landed in her pussy.

01:17:12.260 Nice.

01:17:13.380 So was his feet hanging out?

01:17:15.180 No, she just said that.

01:17:16.480 And so I'm like, this lady's crazy, right?

01:17:19.400 But just what a crazy thing to think, right?

01:17:21.660 She was bonkers.

01:17:23.220 Seemed like she just wanted to show you her pussy.

01:17:25.060 Yeah, maybe.

01:17:26.040 But I fell for it.

01:17:27.620 Yeah.

01:17:29.640 Who doesn't, you know?

01:17:30.900 Who doesn't?

01:17:31.660 That would get me time and time again.

01:17:34.300 I don't know how many times.

01:17:35.320 Ah, you got me.

01:17:36.320 Yeah.

01:17:37.380 Once again, the old caught a guy in my vagina trick.

01:17:41.440 Yeah.

01:17:41.880 It works every time, man.

01:17:45.040 We got one or two more questions, man, and then we'll get y'all on your way.

01:17:52.820 Here's some guy from the future.

01:17:54.340 Hey, what's up, Theo?

01:17:55.660 So I had a question for Mr. Jason Ellis.

01:17:58.800 Since you were a pro fighter, what would be, who's a pro fighter of yours, either past

01:18:06.040 or present time, that you wish you shared the ring with?

01:18:09.820 Love you, brother.

01:18:12.320 Gang, gang.

01:18:13.280 Praise the Lord, baby.

01:18:14.500 ETL, baby.

01:18:15.100 I don't think it's a good idea that everybody I think who's really cool in fighting that

01:18:20.340 I would share the, every time I share the ring with someone who I think is really cool

01:18:23.980 at fighting, I usually get beat up pretty bad.

01:18:25.920 Really?

01:18:26.520 Yeah.

01:18:26.800 It's kind of what I want to do.

01:18:28.080 So, cause it's like the full experience of what's it like to spar with like Keith Jardine?

01:18:32.620 And I don't want Keith Jardine to not punch me.

01:18:35.340 That will be like, not really sparring.

01:18:38.200 Right.

01:18:38.280 So yeah, I've done that with a few of those people, but to fight, fight with one of those

01:18:43.680 people, I, I'm not, I'm not insane.

01:18:47.160 I don't want to die, you know, like I fight cause it's fun, but I don't want to like have

01:18:51.060 a full death wish fight.

01:18:53.140 Yeah.

01:18:53.500 And I feel like that's what would happen if it was all the people that I think is, is

01:18:57.520 really, I sparred Dominic Cruz once before a fight and he like really, he like, uh,

01:19:03.120 after it cause he staggered me.

01:19:04.780 Like he caught me really good cause he's obviously a thousand times better.

01:19:08.180 And that was just going to happen.

01:19:09.780 And he caught me and I got staggered and I kept fighting.

01:19:12.760 And then afterwards he said to me, uh, you know, when I rocked you there and you kept

01:19:17.260 going, that's all you're going to need for this fight.

01:19:19.760 Like, I know you're ready for this fight.

01:19:21.060 I know you can win this fight.

01:19:22.060 Cause you showed me the thing that I was, the only question that I had is what, what

01:19:25.820 happens when you get rocked?

01:19:27.160 And I thought you actually knew you were going to concuss me and to see how I was going

01:19:34.060 to react.

01:19:35.020 I appreciate the help, but it was also like, you guys are insane.

01:19:38.180 And I'm only, when he said pro fighter, I'm not a pro fighter.

01:19:41.700 I've had a, I've had a couple of pro fights, but I'm not a pro fighter.

01:19:44.520 I know what a pro fighter is.

01:19:46.380 That's why I don't need to say the idea that he did hit you and you go down and like, nah,

01:19:51.160 you don't have it.

01:19:52.140 Yeah.

01:19:52.640 Yeah.

01:19:53.060 No.

01:19:53.660 It's not going to work out for you.

01:19:55.160 Yeah.

01:19:55.480 Was he going to tell me that when I woke up or something or, yeah, I don't know how that

01:19:59.260 works.

01:19:59.400 Just testing you.

01:20:00.400 But those, yeah.

01:20:01.140 Yeah, man.

01:20:01.600 Not for you guy.

01:20:04.060 I guess that would, that'd be a sign in itself.

01:20:06.980 Not for you guy.

01:20:08.980 We got one more question that came in right here, actually.

01:20:13.820 What's up fellas?

01:20:14.660 This is Tim from Windsor, Ontario, Canada.

01:20:17.200 Tony, I know you put out a board that had your blood in the paint.

01:20:19.940 I was wondering if you're going to be putting out any other products with your blood in it.

01:20:22.940 And Jason, if you could put out a product with your blood in it, what product would you

01:20:26.120 put out?

01:20:26.860 Thanks fellas.

01:20:29.820 That's an awesome question.

01:20:32.620 No, but actually that, that all happened with Liquid Death.

01:20:35.960 And the reason it happened was because they were talking about doing some sort of unique

01:20:40.160 promotion and they presented that idea to me.

01:20:44.460 And I grew up a fan of Kiss in the seventies.

01:20:48.240 Oh yeah.

01:20:48.700 Yeah.

01:20:48.960 And Kiss did that in comic books, in Marvel comics.

01:20:52.120 They, they made a Kiss comic book and all the members of the band put their blood into

01:20:58.100 the ink vat.

01:20:59.040 Wow.

01:20:59.720 And I thought that was one of the coolest things ever.

01:21:01.900 And so there's people that are saying like, it's satanic and whatever.

01:21:04.780 Or I somehow was copying Lil Nas X, but I didn't even know about his thing when I did

01:21:08.780 it.

01:21:09.100 Yeah.

01:21:09.560 Um, but that's what, that was the motivation.

01:21:12.460 And then when we went to do it, it caused a big ruckus because, well, for one, some people

01:21:17.540 thought it was weird, gross, evil.

01:21:20.160 Awesome.

01:21:20.480 And then other people thought that it was a copy of Lil Nas X and then, well, people

01:21:25.200 have done it forever.

01:21:26.460 Well, you're saying it's like, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

01:21:28.380 But I'm just saying that was, that was my motivation.

01:21:30.100 So to answer his question, no, no more blood.

01:21:32.460 No more.

01:21:33.020 Would you go play as you throw something in there?

01:21:35.500 I'm about to like shoot blood loads into meat pies and tacos.

01:21:42.340 I feel like signature Jason Ellis meat pies with a little bit of blood come in there.

01:21:46.560 Oh, damn.

01:21:47.840 For the, for the community.

01:21:48.880 Cause you gotta get edgy, you know, like, what am I going to do?

01:21:51.300 Like come in with some blood toys?

01:21:53.800 Like it's ridiculous.

01:21:54.520 I gotta come in heavy.

01:21:55.860 Yeah.

01:21:56.500 Blood guitar or, you know what I mean?

01:21:58.000 Some like blood, like a bumper bar for trucks with my blood on it.

01:22:02.500 Yeah.

01:22:02.700 Or a toilet, toilet seat with blood.

01:22:04.960 Oh, there you go.

01:22:05.600 It was hard to find, um, a, uh, skateboard screening company that would do it.

01:22:11.160 Really?

01:22:11.700 Yeah.

01:22:12.220 Well, some people thought what it was, uh, Satan or something.

01:22:15.400 Yeah.

01:22:15.680 Uh, and then, well, I mean other, just people.

01:22:18.780 Yeah.

01:22:19.000 But, but the, the company is like the screening companies.

01:22:21.380 They just were like, I'm not, I'm not going to deal with blood.

01:22:23.740 Right.

01:22:24.520 You know, I get like a bunch of wimps, right?

01:22:26.500 What's a little blood?

01:22:27.340 We're all blood, man.

01:22:28.420 Yeah.

01:22:28.920 Yeah.

01:22:29.380 Yeah.

01:22:29.580 But during the time of COVID, I get it.

01:22:31.200 Like during the time of COVID, just like, yeah, here's some plasma.

01:22:34.480 Mix it up.

01:22:35.080 I take a batch dog, whatever these days.

01:22:37.140 Who knows?

01:22:39.440 My wife's into that stuff.

01:22:41.060 Is she really?

01:22:41.720 Yeah.

01:22:42.180 Oh, jeepers.

01:22:43.200 I get nervous a little bit.

01:22:44.300 It's a fair answer.

01:22:45.280 Cause you only have a certain amount of blood in you.

01:22:47.420 That's what's interesting.

01:22:48.820 You know, what's weird is how, when you lose some blood that you make more blood inside.

01:22:53.120 I'm like, where's that come from?

01:22:54.420 Yeah.

01:22:55.160 I don't know how to make it.

01:22:56.300 Jesus Christ, dude.

01:22:56.840 Jesus Christ makes the blood.

01:22:59.820 I mean, who else does?

01:23:00.740 Who else would?

01:23:01.560 Who else is going to stay up on ice and make your blood?

01:23:04.200 Prometheus.

01:23:04.960 Hey, well, whatever you want to call him, dude.

01:23:07.320 I know he has a fucking couple of screen names.

01:23:08.880 I'm just saying, he hasn't got a beard or shit.

01:23:10.460 He's more of a big, really giant, jacked, bald guy.

01:23:14.340 Look, his IG handle could be Prometheus for sure.

01:23:17.420 I'm not sure.

01:23:17.920 He's not white.

01:23:18.440 That's for sure.

01:23:19.100 He's mixed, probably.

01:23:21.480 Anything else we got?

01:23:22.940 I know we got, oh, this is my last question.

01:23:25.420 What kind of guests are you guys going to have on?

01:23:27.560 I want to come back on and be a guest sometime if you want to guess.

01:23:30.940 Yeah, I do.

01:23:31.480 We'll have you on anytime you want.

01:23:33.540 Do you want to try and skate?

01:23:35.640 Ooh, I don't know.

01:23:37.080 Just on the bottom, not drop in.

01:23:38.940 Oh, yeah, dude.

01:23:39.960 I'll skate straight across the bottom.

01:23:41.660 Is there like a...

01:23:42.420 Like a...

01:23:43.620 Yeah.

01:23:44.920 I can already tell the reason.

01:23:47.380 A toe of sorts like a fucking ski lift?

01:23:49.840 Yeah, yeah, yeah.

01:23:50.300 What the fuck is wrong with you, dude?

01:23:53.120 He wants a harness.

01:23:54.620 Yeah, I want to give on a horse.

01:23:55.800 Yeah.

01:23:56.900 I just want to do...

01:23:57.200 Wait, there's a horse you're holding?

01:23:58.320 Are you skating?

01:23:59.480 I just need some help, brother.

01:24:01.020 You know what I'm saying?

01:24:01.160 Yeah, we'll give you help.

01:24:02.280 Okay, good.

01:24:02.840 I'm not bringing a fucking harness for you.

01:24:04.700 You can hold my hand if you want.

01:24:06.720 Oh, whoa.

01:24:07.300 Hold on, bro.

01:24:08.200 What?

01:24:08.420 It's not like that.

01:24:09.060 It doesn't say my dick.

01:24:09.980 My hand.

01:24:10.560 Two different things.

01:24:11.660 Yeah, but I know.

01:24:12.160 I'll wear a glove if it makes it more headdrawer.

01:24:14.080 Yeah, but you'll put the glove on your dick.

01:24:15.720 I know you.

01:24:17.240 I know you.

01:24:17.860 It's a gateway.

01:24:18.900 He'll be like, that's a weird hand.

01:24:20.160 It's already got one finger.

01:24:21.420 Yeah, dude.

01:24:22.580 Damn, why does this hand have a hard,

01:24:24.920 semi-hard condom already on?

01:24:28.420 We have had guests.

01:24:29.680 We've had mostly skaters.

01:24:30.460 Yeah, you guys have had a couple skateboarders.

01:24:31.600 Yeah, skaters.

01:24:32.220 And Jack Black.

01:24:32.760 We had Jack Black.

01:24:33.640 Oh, I didn't know that.

01:24:34.520 We had Poopies, who's the newest Jackass member.

01:24:37.640 And he talked about his shark attack,

01:24:39.160 which was fascinating and frightening.

01:24:42.160 Didn't fucking Tiger Belly.

01:24:48.400 Yeah.

01:24:48.880 He said he would come down.

01:24:49.720 Oh, Bobby.

01:24:50.200 Bobby said he would come down.

01:24:51.580 That would be huge.

01:24:52.740 That thick little egg.

01:24:53.240 And we, I don't know when this is airing,

01:24:55.240 but we just did Rodney Mullen,

01:24:57.040 and that's going to come out soon,

01:24:57.980 and that was pretty amazing.

01:24:59.000 Yeah, that's the best thing ever.

01:24:59.940 But he's kind of the godfather of modern skateboarding.

01:25:02.200 Uh-uh.

01:25:02.700 He's the greatest athlete ever.

01:25:03.340 He's the guy that invented K-flips.

01:25:05.480 Wow.

01:25:07.500 And 360-flips, and heel-flips.

01:25:09.000 And he still, his story is,

01:25:11.240 it's the most insane story of any human in life.

01:25:13.500 Is it really?

01:25:14.260 Rodney Mullen?

01:25:14.900 He's right now, still skateboarding,

01:25:16.660 at night, in the dark.

01:25:18.640 He only goes-

01:25:19.360 He's 55.

01:25:19.900 And he goes at midnight,

01:25:22.400 and skates till 5 in the morning,

01:25:24.200 and then he goes home and goes to sleep.

01:25:25.680 And then when he lived in London,

01:25:27.040 because his girlfriend's there working,

01:25:29.540 I was like, doesn't it rain there?

01:25:30.720 And he goes, yeah, I bring a wet board.

01:25:32.780 And I'm like, what's a wet board?

01:25:34.640 It's like a board that's waterlogged,

01:25:36.240 and I just skate in the rain.

01:25:37.800 And I'm like, do you bring a rain jacket?

01:25:39.580 He's like, no, just take my shirt off.

01:25:41.460 So at 4 in the morning,

01:25:43.540 you can catch Rodney Mullen in London

01:25:45.080 doing skateboard tricks by himself for hours.

01:25:49.760 Damn.

01:25:50.360 Still.

01:25:52.160 That's cool, man.

01:25:53.380 The skate community is very excited

01:25:55.580 that we got Rodney on the show,

01:25:56.700 because Rodney does not do very many interviews at all.

01:25:59.820 That's awesome, man.

01:26:01.160 Well, congratulations, dude.

01:26:02.380 I'm really excited to see what you guys do with it.

01:26:04.560 And it seemed like it's kind of meant to be

01:26:06.300 that you guys had started out

01:26:07.400 and kind of done something,

01:26:08.260 and then a lot of relationships,

01:26:10.780 even work or not,

01:26:11.720 are hard to, you know,

01:26:12.440 especially in work,

01:26:13.140 are hard to bring back together.

01:26:14.460 You know, sometimes it doesn't happen.

01:26:15.620 So to run it back,

01:26:17.680 I think it's pretty cool.

01:26:18.580 Kind of gives it a new power.

01:26:19.780 It's awesome, man.

01:26:20.500 I've never had more fun.

01:26:21.900 It's not a job, you know?

01:26:23.120 Yeah.

01:26:23.480 It's like I get to talk to my friend.

01:26:24.600 Come down.

01:26:25.440 That's cool.

01:26:26.140 Yeah, dude, I'm going to come down.

01:26:27.160 We'll ask you questions.

01:26:28.340 Yeah, I'd love to, man.

01:26:29.260 And bring the rest of your kids.

01:26:31.340 Make no mistake.

01:26:32.260 They'll be there.

01:26:32.660 Oh, they'll be there.

01:26:34.060 Oh, yeah.

01:26:34.640 Really?

01:26:35.880 Well, these guys are in college.

01:26:38.640 I have another one

01:26:40.180 that's in college in Colorado.

01:26:42.680 Another one that lives in Florida.

01:26:44.120 Damn.

01:26:44.600 He's out of college.

01:26:45.680 That would be rich, bro,

01:26:46.500 to have all them kids, dog.

01:26:47.740 Damn, bro.

01:26:47.920 He got a busy dick, right?

01:26:49.100 Yeah, boy.

01:26:50.840 Damn.

01:26:53.540 Well.

01:26:55.800 No, it was a pleasure to meet you,

01:26:57.580 and it was a pleasure to meet you.

01:26:58.820 I love everything about it.

01:27:00.300 You got a busy dick.

01:27:00.960 All right, good to see you guys.

01:27:02.340 Look, these things never end well, man.

01:27:03.920 These things never end well, man.

01:27:10.040 It's like a first marriage, man.

01:27:12.560 These things just are what they are, you know?

01:27:15.080 Just not a fan of the clothes.

01:27:16.440 I'm glad they have to.

01:27:17.020 Don't go away mad.

01:27:17.940 Just go away.

01:27:18.700 Yeah, yeah, yeah, dude.

01:27:20.080 No stalkers.

01:27:20.760 This is our new podcast, No Stalkers.

01:27:22.520 There you go.

01:27:23.360 And thank you guys, man.

01:27:24.620 And yeah, I'd love to come on, man.

01:27:25.940 I'd love to come on in February, hopefully,

01:27:27.220 if you guys will have me.

01:27:27.900 Yep.

01:27:28.160 Awesome.

01:27:29.080 Thanks.

01:27:29.600 Cheers, man.

01:27:30.060 Now I'm just floating on the breeze

01:27:33.760 And I feel I'm falling like these leaves

01:27:36.700 I must be cornerstone

01:27:39.980 Oh, but when I reach that ground

01:27:44.580 I'll share this peace of mind

01:27:46.740 I found I can feel it in my bones

01:27:50.900 But it's gonna take a little time

01:27:56.560 For me to set that parking brake

01:28:00.380 And let myself unwind

01:28:03.200 Shine that light on me

01:28:07.180 I'll sit and tell you my stories

01:28:12.880 Shine on me

01:28:17.860 And I will find a song

01:28:22.100 I will sing it just for you

01:28:25.540 And now I've been moving way too fast

01:28:33.060 On the runaway train

01:28:34.440 With a heavy load of my past

01:28:37.920 And these roads that I've been riding on

01:28:43.500 They're worn so thin

01:28:44.940 That they're damn near gone

01:28:46.260 I guess now they just weren't

01:28:48.180 Built to land

01:28:49.220 Ladies and gentlemen, I'm Jonathan Kite

01:28:52.280 And welcome to Kite Club

01:28:53.600 A podcast where I'll be sharing thoughts

01:28:55.840 On things like current events

01:28:57.260 Stand-up stories

01:28:58.480 And seven ways to pleasure your partner

01:29:00.820 The answer may shock you

01:29:02.700 Sometimes I'll interview my friends

01:29:04.720 Sometimes I won't

01:29:06.040 And as always, I'll be joined by the voices in my head

01:29:09.540 You have three new voice messages

01:29:12.440 A lot of people are talking about Kite Club

01:29:15.420 I've been talking about Kite Club for so long

01:29:18.220 Longer than anybody else

01:29:19.860 So great

01:29:20.640 Hi, sweet

01:29:22.220 Easy deal

01:29:23.700 Anyone who doesn't listen to Kite Club

01:29:26.140 Is a dodgy bloody wanker

01:29:27.960 Do you know what I mean?

01:29:30.260 I'll take a quarter pounder with cheese

01:29:32.180 And a McFlurry

01:29:33.200 Sorry sir, but our ice cream machine is broken

01:29:35.060 I think Tom Hanks just butt dialed me

01:29:40.000 Anyway

01:29:40.500 First rule of Kite Club is

01:29:42.440 Tell everyone about Kite Club

01:29:44.140 Second rule of Kite Club is

01:29:46.080 Tell everyone about Kite Club

01:29:48.320 Third rule

01:29:49.120 Like and subscribe wherever you listen to podcasts

01:29:52.000 Or watch us on YouTube, yeah?

01:29:54.340 And yes, don't worry

01:29:55.380 My Brad Pitt impression will get better

01:29:57.420 I'll take a quarter pounder with Kite Club

This Past Weekend with Theo Von - December 29, 2021

E373 Tony Hawk & Jason Ellis

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