This Past Weekend with Theo Von

00:00:00.000 We hope you're enjoying your Air Canada flight.

00:00:02.320 Rocky's Vacation, here we come.

00:00:05.060 Whoa, is this economy?

00:00:07.180 Free beer, wine, and snacks.

00:00:09.620 Sweet!

00:00:10.720 Fast-free Wi-Fi means I can make dinner reservations before we land.

00:00:14.760 And with live TV, I'm not missing the game.

00:00:17.800 It's kind of like, I'm already on vacation.

00:00:20.980 Nice!

00:00:22.140 On behalf of Air Canada, nice travels.

00:00:25.260 Wi-Fi available to Airplane members on Equipped Flight.

00:00:27.220 Sponsored by Bell. Conditions apply.

00:00:28.720 CRCanada.com.

00:00:30.000 Today's guest, I'm grateful to finally have her in studio.

00:00:34.940 She is from Atlanta, but has been living in Indiana for quite some time.

00:00:40.420 We'll hear more about it.

00:00:42.080 She is the creator and star of the Miss Pat Show,

00:00:46.220 which is currently on BET Plus and Paramount Plus.

00:00:50.660 She also has her new special on Netflix.

00:00:53.200 You can check it out.

00:00:53.940 It's called Y'all Want to Hear Something Crazy.

00:00:57.660 She's my new friend.

00:01:00.040 And she brought some beautiful ladies with her.

00:01:02.240 I'll say that.

00:01:02.880 Some real lookers.

00:01:05.940 The hilarious Miss Pat.

00:01:08.140 For me to set that parking brake

00:01:10.600 And let myself unwind

00:01:13.400 Shine that light on me

00:01:17.340 I'll sit and tell you my stories

00:01:23.020 Shine on me

00:01:28.020 And I will find a song

00:01:32.240 And I will find a song

00:01:32.260 And I will find a song

00:01:32.280 I'll be singing

00:01:33.440 And just go

00:01:35.000 So you're moving back to Atlanta.

00:01:43.220 Are you excited?

00:01:44.000 Are you?

00:01:44.320 I just moved back

00:01:46.000 I am excited

00:01:47.000 I shoot the show there

00:01:48.880 I shoot the Miss Pat show there

00:01:50.140 And I shot my special there

00:01:51.220 I'm from Atlanta

00:01:52.040 So my husband just retired

00:01:53.560 And I was like

00:01:54.500 Look, I'm ready to get the fuck out of Indiana

00:01:56.080 Let's go home

00:01:57.080 Yeah

00:01:57.460 So I bought some land

00:01:59.520 And I'm building on it

00:02:02.040 Dang

00:02:02.920 What y'all gonna have?

00:02:04.000 Like anything special at the house?

00:02:05.380 Like anything you always wanted?

00:02:07.200 I wanted a podcast studio

00:02:09.020 Because right now

00:02:09.560 I was doing it

00:02:10.180 I was doing it a little bit everywhere

00:02:11.320 I do it on Zoom

00:02:12.160 And then when I was in Indy

00:02:13.340 I would do it out of my movie theater room

00:02:14.920 So I really want to get big time

00:02:16.760 Like you

00:02:17.320 And everybody else

00:02:18.600 So I built a podcast studio

00:02:20.500 Outside the house

00:02:22.060 Oh, nice

00:02:22.920 Yeah

00:02:23.260 And y'all gonna have what else?

00:02:24.460 A pool?

00:02:25.680 A pool

00:02:26.100 A basketball court

00:02:27.200 Oh, nice

00:02:28.000 It's gonna be alright

00:02:28.960 Yeah

00:02:29.520 You got any fancy neighbors?

00:02:31.760 Like is it in a fancy place?

00:02:33.200 No

00:02:33.420 It's not in a fancy place

00:02:34.800 Twelve people

00:02:35.580 The youngest person might be 65

00:02:38.160 At y'all's house?

00:02:39.600 At my neighborhood

00:02:39.900 Oh, in your neighborhood

00:02:40.640 Mm-hmm

00:02:41.140 Little small neighborhood

00:02:42.200 Oh, wow

00:02:42.480 And it had a couple acreage

00:02:45.180 And I just bought it

00:02:46.200 Dang

00:02:46.620 I knew I wanted a big house

00:02:47.880 But I didn't want a big mortgage

00:02:49.060 Yeah

00:02:49.740 So I just found some land

00:02:51.060 And I towed the house down

00:02:52.440 And I'm gonna get with it

00:02:53.540 Damn

00:02:53.920 And who's gonna live at the house with you?

00:02:55.560 Your husband?

00:02:56.260 You?

00:02:57.140 I have four kids

00:02:58.360 That I have custody of

00:02:59.260 My niece's kids

00:02:59.940 And then I have a 21

00:03:01.180 Or 22

00:03:01.940 And a 23 year old

00:03:03.520 Damn

00:03:04.260 They have three grandkids

00:03:05.500 And my son

00:03:06.460 They live nearby

00:03:07.500 Yeah, your life's crazy

00:03:08.800 I felt

00:03:09.180 Even just a half hour

00:03:10.380 Of your special

00:03:11.380 I felt like I watched

00:03:12.360 It reminded me of The Wire

00:03:13.960 Remember that show?

00:03:18.100 Yeah

00:03:18.500 It took a long time

00:03:20.580 For me to get into The Wire

00:03:21.640 Me too

00:03:22.080 My husband is a Christian

00:03:23.320 I mean, he grew up Christian

00:03:24.400 So, and I grew up, you know

00:03:25.880 Of course, selling drugs

00:03:26.780 You know my background

00:03:27.580 And he was kept raving about

00:03:29.220 You gotta wash this show

00:03:30.260 I don't wanna wash that bullshit

00:03:31.640 I live that shit

00:03:32.520 And one day I sat down

00:03:34.060 And I watched The Wire

00:03:34.820 And I was like

00:03:35.260 Oh my God

00:03:36.320 This shit is so fucking real

00:03:37.960 Yeah, they did a good job

00:03:39.100 They did a good fucking job

00:03:40.620 But I think I got into it

00:03:41.700 Like in the fourth season

00:03:42.960 Oh yeah

00:03:44.040 Real late

00:03:45.020 Yeah, yeah

00:03:45.840 Oh yeah, I didn't get into it

00:03:46.960 I don't think until like

00:03:47.620 One year ago

00:03:48.380 Really?

00:03:49.260 Yeah

00:03:49.500 Oh my God

00:03:50.580 That's one of the best

00:03:52.040 Underrated shows

00:03:53.440 That was out there

00:03:54.160 And it was so fucking real

00:03:55.640 Yeah, it was really good

00:03:56.540 I could really relate

00:03:57.180 You know what show

00:03:58.000 I really missed

00:03:58.660 Was In the Heat of the Night

00:03:59.680 Do you remember that show?

00:04:00.780 I do remember

00:04:01.480 In the Heat of the Night

00:04:02.760 Remember that show?

00:04:03.780 Yeah, it was good, huh?

00:04:05.220 You telling your age, Theo

00:04:06.440 No worries

00:04:06.760 What, I'm showing my age, you mean?

00:04:10.140 Yeah

00:04:10.480 Oh yeah, sorry

00:04:11.620 That's why they need to do a remake

00:04:13.280 So I can sound really like

00:04:14.760 I know what

00:04:15.360 Like I just miss

00:04:16.560 Dude, I saw the lady

00:04:18.780 From In the Heat of the Night

00:04:19.620 One time

00:04:20.180 Eating breakfast

00:04:21.100 With her husband

00:04:21.900 I lost my mind

00:04:23.980 Do you remember

00:04:24.880 The detective, his wife?

00:04:27.100 Not quite

00:04:27.980 You know who I remember

00:04:28.900 From In the Heat of the Night

00:04:29.680 Is the black dude

00:04:31.120 And then the officer

00:04:32.000 The other one

00:04:33.260 Oh yeah, Carol O'Connor

00:04:34.580 Yeah, Carol O'Connor

00:04:35.500 The black guy, Virgil Tibbs

00:04:37.340 That was his name

00:04:38.080 His wife was Althea

00:04:39.540 And I saw her

00:04:40.740 At the breakfast place

00:04:41.980 And I really lost it

00:04:43.060 Oh wow

00:04:43.920 I've never heard anybody

00:04:44.920 Say they was crazy

00:04:45.760 About the Heat of the Night

00:04:46.800 Yeah, I loved it

00:04:47.960 I really loved it

00:04:49.120 My shit was Duke's a Hazzle

00:04:50.480 Back in that era

00:04:51.120 Really?

00:04:52.020 I had it

00:04:52.440 You like them country boys?

00:04:53.980 Well, I'm from the south

00:04:54.940 And you know

00:04:55.640 Everybody was going crazy

00:04:57.200 Over Daisy Duke

00:04:58.100 You know, because I was really young

00:04:59.760 And the boys were going crazy

00:05:01.900 Over Bo Duke

00:05:03.460 Is who I thought

00:05:04.220 Was fucking drop gorgeous

00:05:06.240 Damn

00:05:06.980 Oh, I had the biggest crush

00:05:08.480 On Bo Duke

00:05:09.160 Let's pull him up

00:05:10.100 Colin, can we get Bo Duke up there?

00:05:12.400 Back in the day

00:05:13.400 And one of them

00:05:14.140 Is a homosexual man

00:05:15.880 I think, isn't he?

00:05:17.280 One of them love men

00:05:18.400 Yeah

00:05:18.640 Or preferred men

00:05:20.020 Where do you get that shit from?

00:05:21.540 But they didn't say it

00:05:22.300 Oh, I think everybody knows it

00:05:24.040 I think

00:05:24.560 Let me see

00:05:25.940 The one with the black hair?

00:05:27.720 I think you might have been

00:05:29.220 Don't tell me about baby daddy

00:05:31.680 I know

00:05:32.180 I think you might have been

00:05:33.100 Lusting after that man, man

00:05:35.260 Bo?

00:05:36.340 Damn

00:05:36.720 That's Bo right there

00:05:37.640 The one with the blonde hair

00:05:38.660 Yeah

00:05:39.220 What about the picture

00:05:39.960 With that hat

00:05:40.580 With just the no shirt on?

00:05:42.040 Oh, everybody loved

00:05:43.100 Bo Duke making the day

00:05:44.280 Yeah, he was good, huh?

00:05:45.920 Yeah

00:05:46.320 I think they down in Georgia

00:05:48.160 Aren't they?

00:05:48.920 I don't know

00:05:49.800 Bo Duke

00:05:51.300 I don't know

00:05:53.260 One of them

00:05:54.640 I think preferred men

00:05:55.500 I could be wrong

00:05:56.280 But

00:05:57.100 I don't know

00:05:59.560 So tell

00:06:00.340 So your husband

00:06:01.740 I heard you met him

00:06:02.540 And he was in the military

00:06:03.540 And then

00:06:04.220 And now he's done

00:06:07.020 He's retired?

00:06:07.540 He retired

00:06:08.440 He

00:06:08.660 What was he?

00:06:11.160 Six, seven years

00:06:12.100 In the military

00:06:12.640 Something like that

00:06:13.500 And when I met him

00:06:14.420 He had just got out

00:06:15.160 So he was really young

00:06:16.240 And

00:06:17.040 He worked for General Motors

00:06:19.020 He makes the Allison Transmission

00:06:20.460 For the military division

00:06:21.840 Oh, wow

00:06:22.380 And so he retired

00:06:23.300 About two

00:06:24.400 Two, three months ago

00:06:25.640 Dang

00:06:26.380 In December he retired

00:06:27.500 Is it weird?

00:06:28.260 Because some people say

00:06:28.940 When people get retired

00:06:30.220 Then it gets weird

00:06:31.520 Around the house

00:06:32.100 Because somebody's around more

00:06:33.440 But

00:06:33.660 I'm never around

00:06:35.260 So I'm like

00:06:36.140 Literally

00:06:36.660 I do morning radio

00:06:38.240 At V103

00:06:39.440 In Atlanta

00:06:40.080 And then I leave there

00:06:41.340 And I go to set

00:06:42.120 And if I'm not doing set

00:06:43.760 I'm fucking traveling

00:06:44.960 But

00:06:45.300 It's a little weird

00:06:46.500 Having him home

00:06:47.260 Doing a day

00:06:47.720 I think he's bored

00:06:48.600 Out of his mind

00:06:49.260 And I'm like

00:06:49.940 What do you want to do?

00:06:50.820 I'm cool

00:06:51.340 I'm cool

00:06:52.040 I'm like

00:06:52.260 You want to come see me

00:06:52.960 Tape the show?

00:06:53.480 Because it's in front

00:06:54.000 Of a live studio audience

00:06:55.080 I'm cool

00:06:56.080 I'm cool

00:06:56.560 So I just

00:06:57.080 I think he's just

00:06:57.740 Got to adjust

00:06:58.520 Because my husband's

00:06:59.520 So used to being

00:07:00.220 Head of the household

00:07:01.060 And he's been working

00:07:02.620 Our whole fucking marriage

00:07:04.320 Yeah

00:07:04.700 Since I've known him

00:07:05.640 And this is first time

00:07:06.980 Not having a job

00:07:08.860 Yeah

00:07:09.340 So I think he's kind of

00:07:10.580 Adjust to the shit

00:07:12.220 Yeah

00:07:12.960 Yeah

00:07:14.240 I got to get a wife

00:07:15.180 Or something one day

00:07:16.160 I

00:07:16.520 Yeah

00:07:18.180 I only ever been

00:07:19.000 With one black woman

00:07:19.900 In my life

00:07:20.600 And

00:07:20.800 She had

00:07:22.960 You know it's legal

00:07:24.020 I know

00:07:24.480 Yeah

00:07:25.100 Ain't nobody

00:07:26.920 Stopping you

00:07:27.500 That mullet

00:07:29.540 You rocking

00:07:30.060 Might be stopping you

00:07:31.200 This is a stop sign

00:07:32.800 For black women

00:07:33.700 Well

00:07:33.940 It don't say

00:07:35.280 It don't say

00:07:36.100 You like us

00:07:36.920 Oh come on

00:07:38.300 That haircut

00:07:39.440 Do not say

00:07:40.220 You like sisters

00:07:41.180 Damn

00:07:41.740 I got it

00:07:42.260 Then maybe I need

00:07:42.900 To put on something

00:07:43.580 Else

00:07:43.760 Some bead work

00:07:44.380 I've never seen

00:07:45.020 A black woman

00:07:45.880 Fuck a white dude

00:07:46.780 With a mullet

00:07:47.340 Oh we about to

00:07:48.100 Change the game

00:07:48.900 That's what I'm saying

00:07:49.780 Well you need to

00:07:49.860 Cut that motherfucking

00:07:50.580 Mullet off

00:07:51.040 Oh I don't know baby

00:07:52.320 This is really

00:07:52.960 My fire powers in there

00:07:54.440 Well you need to

00:07:55.400 Explain to the black woman

00:07:56.400 This is my fire power

00:07:57.520 Okay

00:07:57.880 It ain't what you thinking

00:07:59.120 Okay okay

00:08:00.320 Yeah yeah

00:08:01.460 No it's not like

00:08:02.200 A racist emblem

00:08:03.260 It's just my

00:08:03.880 I just feel more confident

00:08:05.220 Well you don't have

00:08:05.980 On a confederate flag

00:08:07.100 But it's just

00:08:07.640 It's the haircut

00:08:08.620 It is huh

00:08:09.420 Black women are very

00:08:10.860 Partique about

00:08:11.500 What they men look like

00:08:12.740 Yeah

00:08:13.060 You never

00:08:13.760 That's why you never

00:08:14.480 That's why you never

00:08:17.520 Really see black men

00:08:18.560 With dirty shoes

00:08:19.460 Yeah

00:08:20.100 Unless they just

00:08:20.720 Ain't got no money

00:08:21.540 Right

00:08:22.020 But if you fly

00:08:22.820 You gonna always see

00:08:23.920 Black men with

00:08:24.520 Clean shoes on

00:08:25.520 Yeah black people

00:08:26.580 Always smell real exciting

00:08:28.220 Exciting that damn

00:08:30.740 Yeah

00:08:31.300 Oh dude

00:08:32.240 You know

00:08:32.840 If a fucking

00:08:33.700 You'll meet a brother

00:08:35.240 He smell like a damn

00:08:36.140 Bath and body works

00:08:37.320 You know what I'm saying

00:08:37.940 Sometimes black people

00:08:39.100 I feel like they

00:08:40.420 A lot of times

00:08:41.040 They just are more

00:08:42.200 Yeah

00:08:43.340 Flashy

00:08:43.940 Flashy

00:08:44.680 You know

00:08:45.600 Like

00:08:46.240 Why is it

00:08:46.920 Why is it

00:08:47.680 Is it just because

00:08:50.040 Because we make

00:08:50.460 Everything look good

00:08:51.440 Yeah

00:08:51.960 I mean if you want

00:08:53.000 To sell something

00:08:53.660 Let's be honest

00:08:54.300 Who you take it to

00:08:55.500 You take it to

00:08:56.380 The African American

00:08:57.360 You take it to

00:08:58.320 The black people

00:08:58.900 Because we make

00:08:59.420 Everything flash

00:09:00.220 But now you're

00:09:00.920 Doing that wrong

00:09:01.500 Yeah

00:09:01.820 I mean think about it

00:09:02.540 How many white

00:09:03.560 Athletes got a shoe

00:09:04.660 Hmm

00:09:06.400 Your boy

00:09:07.740 Tom Brady

00:09:09.140 Had some Uggs

00:09:10.000 Yeah

00:09:10.280 Yeah that's true

00:09:11.760 And then

00:09:13.480 Oh boy

00:09:14.240 Larry Bird

00:09:15.300 Had the Converse

00:09:16.240 And it's only because

00:09:17.200 Him and

00:09:17.620 Magic had that thing

00:09:19.460 Going on back in the day

00:09:20.420 Yeah

00:09:20.820 It's really hard

00:09:22.160 You gotta

00:09:22.980 I don't think

00:09:24.440 Black people buy

00:09:24.980 A white shoe

00:09:25.580 That's a good point

00:09:26.600 Yeah because

00:09:27.880 You know

00:09:28.360 You want something

00:09:29.620 To sell

00:09:29.940 You take it to

00:09:30.500 The US

00:09:30.780 Damn huh

00:09:31.960 Yeah we're

00:09:33.240 Walking the advertisement

00:09:34.020 All the time

00:09:34.460 We turn anything

00:09:35.140 Hot and fresh

00:09:36.120 Yeah huh

00:09:36.980 Yeah I think

00:09:38.360 People always look

00:09:39.820 To the black community

00:09:40.600 For like what's cool

00:09:41.620 Huh

00:09:41.980 We're the coolest

00:09:43.540 People on earth

00:09:44.300 Yeah

00:09:44.780 Nobody's cooler than us

00:09:46.660 That's why we cop it

00:09:47.780 Yeah let me think

00:09:49.020 Who else could be

00:09:49.840 Maybe aliens

00:09:50.660 I heard somewhere

00:09:51.500 That black people

00:09:52.160 And aliens don't get along

00:09:53.300 Did you ever hear

00:09:53.840 Is that like a thing

00:09:54.560 In the black culture

00:09:55.300 Do you really think

00:09:56.280 Alien is fucking real

00:09:57.300 I mean

00:09:59.080 They gotta

00:09:59.920 They gotta have

00:10:00.420 Some of them

00:10:01.140 Well how many

00:10:01.800 How many times

00:10:02.660 Do you think

00:10:03.180 A black person

00:10:03.740 Made an alien

00:10:04.320 I don't know

00:10:05.560 Do you know anything

00:10:06.300 Fuck no

00:10:07.720 Are you serious

00:10:08.500 Yeah

00:10:08.880 I don't know

00:10:11.240 If you guys

00:10:11.660 Are telling

00:10:12.040 Not saying something

00:10:12.960 Who the fuck

00:10:14.020 Y'all think

00:10:14.640 As nosy as white people

00:10:16.080 Y'all motherfuckers

00:10:16.980 Know if it was aliens

00:10:17.820 Before us

00:10:18.420 We mine all

00:10:19.300 Motherfucking pigs

00:10:20.080 You ain't never

00:10:20.920 Heard no black people

00:10:21.580 Say I'm just gonna

00:10:22.040 Go to the moon

00:10:22.560 And fuck with

00:10:23.020 These people in the sky

00:10:23.840 That's white people shit

00:10:25.840 That ain't all shit

00:10:26.760 The fuck are you talking about

00:10:27.900 Yeah that's probably true

00:10:29.080 Well aliens and black people

00:10:30.460 Don't get along

00:10:31.020 What the fuck

00:10:31.560 That's supposed to be

00:10:32.400 I don't know

00:10:33.120 That's just what I heard

00:10:33.920 That's like something

00:10:34.420 I heard through the grapevine

00:10:35.360 Over the years

00:10:35.880 That's like an old wives

00:10:36.940 Tale or something

00:10:37.660 Well let me

00:10:38.400 I've heard all white men

00:10:39.920 Dicks are small

00:10:40.620 That ain't true is it

00:10:41.780 No

00:10:42.160 Well thank you

00:10:43.320 Yeah

00:10:43.680 Yeah

00:10:44.060 You hurry up

00:10:46.060 And defend that

00:10:46.520 No

00:10:46.780 Absolutely not

00:10:48.980 Oh that's wild

00:10:51.720 What else is going on today

00:10:54.980 Not much really

00:10:57.300 Just chilling pretty much

00:10:58.740 You know

00:10:59.120 I'm trying to think of

00:11:00.420 Something else super

00:11:00.980 That's exciting

00:11:01.500 So you got your special out

00:11:02.940 Yeah

00:11:03.360 Yeah

00:11:03.800 And I watched about

00:11:04.580 30 minutes of it last night

00:11:05.600 It was awesome

00:11:06.000 You tell so many jokes

00:11:07.340 I mean you just

00:11:08.140 Bum bum bum bum bum bum bum

00:11:09.940 Thank you

00:11:10.820 Robert Townsend directed it

00:11:13.480 And it wasn't easy

00:11:15.240 Getting together with him

00:11:16.360 Boy he worked the shit

00:11:17.220 Out of me

00:11:17.580 Really

00:11:17.900 I had to meet with him

00:11:19.400 Once a week

00:11:20.980 For four hours a day

00:11:22.080 On Zoom

00:11:23.180 And do my whole set

00:11:24.540 And he would take it

00:11:25.680 And twist it

00:11:26.340 He would listen to

00:11:27.160 Every set I did

00:11:28.140 Out on the road

00:11:28.960 And hit me back that Monday

00:11:30.580 And say this is what

00:11:31.160 We're going to work on

00:11:31.800 This Wednesday

00:11:32.440 Are you serious

00:11:33.200 Yes I have

00:11:33.820 I've never heard of a director

00:11:34.500 Doing that

00:11:35.020 I haven't either

00:11:36.040 But you know

00:11:37.580 To step to Robert Townsend

00:11:39.220 And say you want him

00:11:39.920 To direct your special

00:11:40.860 When he only did Raw

00:11:42.540 For Eddie Murphy

00:11:43.660 I think

00:11:45.020 I hope I said the right one

00:11:46.200 For Eddie Murphy

00:11:46.940 But he did Eddie Murphy Raw

00:11:48.360 And he did Bill Cosby

00:11:49.600 Last one

00:11:50.180 To step to say

00:11:51.160 You want him to direct

00:11:52.180 Your special

00:11:52.800 That was huge

00:11:54.160 Wow

00:11:54.560 And he was like

00:11:55.240 No

00:11:55.580 And I was like

00:11:56.440 I need you

00:11:57.360 I knew I just needed him

00:11:58.780 You know

00:11:59.580 I just felt like

00:12:00.560 He was a director

00:12:01.420 That would care

00:12:02.000 That would sit down

00:12:02.920 This is my first special

00:12:03.940 I really wanted it

00:12:04.800 To be good

00:12:05.480 And it took a minute

00:12:07.700 But he finally came through

00:12:09.080 And he directed it for me

00:12:10.320 And it was not easy work

00:12:11.880 Wow

00:12:12.700 He really put you through it

00:12:14.180 He put me through it

00:12:15.200 I mean

00:12:15.460 And so

00:12:16.300 I was supposed to tape it

00:12:17.800 A year earlier

00:12:18.660 But the pandemic hit

00:12:19.900 Yeah

00:12:20.220 So he came on

00:12:21.520 Right after the

00:12:22.240 Right after the pandemic hit

00:12:23.640 I think

00:12:24.060 And he worked

00:12:25.380 The dog shit out of me

00:12:26.400 Damn

00:12:26.960 I will call him again

00:12:28.100 If I got another special

00:12:29.240 Because

00:12:29.680 You know

00:12:30.400 When you drop a special

00:12:31.220 You really worry about

00:12:32.220 You know

00:12:32.640 Do people gonna think it funny

00:12:33.780 Is it gonna flow right

00:12:34.800 I didn't watch it

00:12:36.140 I watched the cuts

00:12:37.060 And put together

00:12:37.900 But I was like

00:12:38.580 I don't really wanna be

00:12:39.680 You know

00:12:40.220 Cause I'm scared

00:12:41.040 I'm scared

00:12:41.600 What people gonna think about it

00:12:43.060 Yeah

00:12:43.480 And I just started to look

00:12:44.740 At the feedback

00:12:45.300 And people were like

00:12:45.680 Oh my god

00:12:46.060 It's so good

00:12:46.600 It's so funny

00:12:47.180 It's just joking

00:12:47.680 It reminded me of comedy

00:12:48.980 Back in the day

00:12:49.780 And you know

00:12:50.380 Cause I'm not

00:12:51.320 I'm not

00:12:51.840 I say what the fuck

00:12:53.060 I wanna say

00:12:53.800 Oh yeah

00:12:54.300 You do for sure

00:12:55.100 More than anybody

00:12:55.800 I think I've heard in a long time

00:12:57.140 Yeah

00:12:57.400 So I mean

00:12:58.060 You know

00:12:58.460 The cancel culture

00:12:59.420 They out there

00:13:01.420 I mean

00:13:02.080 I'm not worried about it

00:13:04.080 I'm gonna say what the fuck

00:13:04.820 I wanna say

00:13:05.340 You digest it

00:13:06.220 How the fuck

00:13:06.700 You wanna say it

00:13:07.500 Yeah

00:13:07.820 And one of the things

00:13:09.400 That was really

00:13:11.300 Robert really liked

00:13:12.700 The thing I did at the end

00:13:13.880 I don't know if you got to the end

00:13:14.820 My daughter is gay

00:13:15.840 And I tell all of these bits

00:13:18.600 About my daughter being gay

00:13:19.960 And then I do this whole speech

00:13:21.220 At the end about

00:13:21.960 You know

00:13:23.360 Which

00:13:24.680 At first

00:13:26.200 I didn't think

00:13:26.780 They was gonna take it

00:13:27.620 So I said

00:13:28.060 No matter what you've been through

00:13:29.360 In life

00:13:29.700 Learn how to laugh at it

00:13:30.760 I don't give a fuck

00:13:31.460 If somebody

00:13:31.800 Stuck they thumb up your ass

00:13:33.580 If they didn't get past

00:13:34.520 The knuckle

00:13:34.880 You won

00:13:35.580 Yeah

00:13:35.860 And Netflix was like

00:13:37.360 What the fuck

00:13:38.180 But that's what I've been

00:13:43.440 Saying on stage

00:13:44.360 With that hour

00:13:45.800 I had

00:13:46.260 For the longest

00:13:47.260 Cause I mean

00:13:47.860 I don't give a fuck

00:13:49.200 What you've been through

00:13:50.020 Yeah

00:13:50.340 You can get through it

00:13:51.500 If you believe

00:13:52.000 That you can get through it

00:13:53.260 The mind is a strong muscle

00:13:55.100 It take on

00:13:55.860 What you put in it

00:13:56.880 Yeah

00:13:57.180 If you say I'm depressed

00:13:58.360 It gonna be

00:13:58.900 Your mind

00:13:59.820 Will make your whole body

00:14:00.860 Depressed

00:14:01.380 So I don't use words

00:14:02.660 Like unhappy

00:14:03.460 Depressed

00:14:03.980 And I can't

00:14:04.960 I tell a motherfucker

00:14:05.660 It ain't

00:14:06.080 There's not a such thing

00:14:07.260 As you can't

00:14:08.240 There's a yes

00:14:08.880 Somewhere

00:14:09.240 If you keep trying

00:14:10.220 Wow

00:14:10.760 Yeah

00:14:11.960 That's a good attitude

00:14:12.900 Yeah

00:14:13.220 I've recently been thinking

00:14:14.200 That like

00:14:14.580 Whatever I thought

00:14:15.440 If I have a thought

00:14:16.320 It becomes a feeling

00:14:17.160 So I gotta be real careful

00:14:18.460 About what my thoughts are

00:14:19.740 Yeah

00:14:20.040 Because if you say

00:14:20.840 If you tell yourself

00:14:21.740 That you're not good

00:14:22.660 Your mind will make you

00:14:24.140 The whole body

00:14:25.000 Feel like you're not good

00:14:25.720 Damn

00:14:26.120 And I've just learned that

00:14:27.960 I learned that actually

00:14:28.980 From a teacher

00:14:29.740 Her name was Miss Troop

00:14:31.040 She said you can do

00:14:31.900 And be anything

00:14:32.500 In the fucking world

00:14:33.280 You wanna be

00:14:34.000 The dumbest question

00:14:35.140 Is to question not ask

00:14:36.180 And that made me ask people

00:14:38.020 Any fucking thing

00:14:39.200 I wanted to ask them

00:14:40.100 But it's so funny

00:14:40.980 Because a lot of people

00:14:41.780 Will hear a teacher

00:14:42.420 Say something like that

00:14:43.360 Right

00:14:43.660 Because probably teachers

00:14:45.360 Say that to everybody

00:14:46.160 In a way

00:14:46.780 But a lot of times

00:14:48.500 It doesn't activate in us

00:14:50.480 You know

00:14:50.980 I wonder what made it

00:14:52.460 That active

00:14:53.000 You know what I'm saying

00:14:53.740 It's kind of interesting how

00:14:54.740 This teacher spent

00:14:56.340 A lot of time with me

00:14:57.300 Because I grew up

00:14:58.240 In the inner city of Atlanta

00:14:59.320 In the ghetto

00:15:00.280 And she would

00:15:01.660 You know

00:15:02.040 Like she taught me

00:15:02.980 How to read

00:15:03.700 And you know

00:15:05.180 She just instilled

00:15:06.380 A lot of things in me

00:15:07.580 That my mama did

00:15:08.620 Yeah

00:15:09.020 And I'm 50 now

00:15:11.360 And I still quote her

00:15:12.820 To this day

00:15:13.600 Wow

00:15:13.980 When I'm down and out

00:15:15.140 I said Miss Troop

00:15:16.040 Said I can do

00:15:16.680 And be in the fucking thing

00:15:17.520 I wanna be

00:15:18.060 When I went to my husband

00:15:19.200 Said I'm gonna be a comedian

00:15:20.480 He was like girl

00:15:21.060 Cause I'm a convicted fellow

00:15:22.020 He was like

00:15:22.280 Just keep the fucking job

00:15:23.820 In general mode

00:15:24.480 I'm like no

00:15:25.400 I wanna be a comedian

00:15:27.360 This shit look easy

00:15:28.420 I'm having fun

00:15:29.340 You get to eat

00:15:30.300 Cause everybody

00:15:30.780 Started doing comedy

00:15:31.940 Well at least I did

00:15:33.060 To eat the free food

00:15:34.100 And the drinks and shit

00:15:35.040 And he's like

00:15:36.060 I get to eat

00:15:36.800 And hey

00:15:37.820 You get that little tension

00:15:38.860 And my husband's like

00:15:39.400 Just keep the fucking job

00:15:40.340 In general

00:15:40.560 I say no

00:15:41.320 I'm gonna be a fucking comedian

00:15:43.060 He's like oh lord

00:15:44.060 This bitch just don't wanna work

00:15:45.420 That is true

00:15:47.820 A lot of comedians

00:15:48.840 Cause part of the temptation

00:15:50.940 In the beginning is

00:15:51.700 This shit does not feel

00:15:52.700 Like a real job

00:15:53.760 It don't

00:15:54.220 And it feels kind of

00:15:55.260 If you have a natural

00:15:56.560 Acclimation of being

00:15:57.540 Making people laugh

00:15:58.520 You're like this shit

00:15:59.200 Is easy

00:16:00.220 It's easy

00:16:01.220 It's fun

00:16:01.860 You hanging out

00:16:02.480 With people you like

00:16:03.360 You up all night

00:16:04.740 You get them

00:16:05.300 Twenty thirty dollars

00:16:06.420 And you know

00:16:07.160 Them few little

00:16:08.080 Especially like

00:16:09.180 If you ain't got no real bills

00:16:10.420 Or you a waiter

00:16:12.520 Or something

00:16:13.060 And you go to your job

00:16:14.040 During the day

00:16:14.520 But it's so much fun

00:16:15.740 At night

00:16:16.240 To hang around

00:16:17.020 People that you really

00:16:17.900 Fucking like

00:16:18.420 They do what you do

00:16:19.280 And you watch everybody

00:16:20.420 Turn that fucking

00:16:22.120 Happiness into

00:16:23.600 A struggle

00:16:24.440 Where they trying to make it

00:16:25.780 Or trying to make this shit

00:16:26.980 Work for them

00:16:27.500 So this is all they gotta do

00:16:28.840 Because this is what

00:16:29.560 They love to do

00:16:30.460 Yeah

00:16:30.820 Yeah there is something

00:16:32.160 That's kind of beautiful

00:16:32.820 About it in that sense

00:16:33.920 You know

00:16:34.340 Do you think

00:16:35.700 Sometimes I feel like

00:16:36.660 Strippers

00:16:37.200 I notice a similarity

00:16:38.200 Between strippers and comedians

00:16:39.420 Do you ever feel that way

00:16:40.140 A little bit

00:16:40.640 Now I don't know

00:16:41.840 A goddamn thing about strippers

00:16:43.580 I'm fatter than a motherfucker

00:16:44.680 What the fuck

00:16:45.560 You think I know

00:16:46.340 Alien strippers

00:16:47.400 What's gonna be next

00:16:48.520 For you Theo

00:16:49.020 I don't know shit about that

00:16:50.100 I don't even go

00:16:50.700 To no fucking strip club

00:16:51.560 I don't even like pussy

00:16:53.000 I don't like my own pussy

00:16:54.260 So why am I going

00:16:55.280 To look at other bitches

00:16:56.140 With pussies

00:16:57.080 You need to stay

00:16:58.540 To fuck out

00:16:58.920 Them strip clubs

00:16:59.600 I don't like them either

00:17:02.680 I'm just thinking

00:17:03.720 Ever dealing

00:17:05.020 You do

00:17:05.480 You asking me

00:17:06.060 I notice that comedy

00:17:07.360 And pussy

00:17:08.280 Go together

00:17:09.300 Not for me

00:17:10.620 I don't know

00:17:12.160 Shit about no goddamn

00:17:13.260 Script club

00:17:13.720 I'm fat

00:17:14.180 Bitches built like me

00:17:15.660 Do videos like Lizzo

00:17:17.360 Lizzo got shot

00:17:20.700 Didn't she see the one

00:17:21.440 That got shot or no

00:17:22.240 No you getting

00:17:22.780 Your black folks mixed up

00:17:23.800 That was Megan Astaire

00:17:25.000 You got shot in the foot

00:17:25.840 Lizzo was the plus side woman

00:17:27.920 Who be giving it to them

00:17:29.360 On the internet

00:17:30.460 Lizzo be throwing that

00:17:31.680 Thick at you baby

00:17:32.340 She be throwing that

00:17:33.140 Thick butter

00:17:33.820 Yeah

00:17:34.160 She be throwing that baby

00:17:36.000 She got

00:17:36.760 That business quick baby

00:17:38.080 That business quick

00:17:39.180 And that ain't no

00:17:39.940 And that ain't no

00:17:40.600 Country crop either

00:17:41.600 She be greased up

00:17:42.980 She look like

00:17:44.860 If you grab her

00:17:45.560 She'll slip out your hand

00:17:46.920 Oh you can't even

00:17:49.380 Get a hug on her

00:17:50.360 You can't even

00:17:51.280 Lock a hug on her

00:17:52.120 I don't know

00:17:52.620 What kind of cocoa butter

00:17:53.700 They use on Lizzo

00:17:54.660 But I be like

00:17:55.180 Her ass is shiny

00:17:56.860 And she be throwing

00:17:58.300 That flat at your ass

00:18:00.220 She's beautiful

00:18:03.260 But I love me some Lizzo

00:18:04.680 That's hilarious

00:18:05.620 So why did you say

00:18:08.220 You think comedy

00:18:09.040 And strippers

00:18:10.000 Go together

00:18:10.640 Because it's like

00:18:11.500 Putting yourself out there

00:18:12.680 There's something about it

00:18:13.800 Like it's

00:18:14.260 You're like putting

00:18:15.660 Whatever you have

00:18:16.780 Inside of you

00:18:17.400 Out there

00:18:17.900 Both of us naked

00:18:18.800 Because once you get on stage

00:18:20.180 The stripper is naked

00:18:21.120 As a comedian

00:18:22.140 You really don't know

00:18:22.820 If they're gonna last

00:18:23.520 So you're naked too

00:18:24.660 Until you grab control

00:18:26.460 Until you learn

00:18:27.220 How to slide down that pole

00:18:28.760 Yeah

00:18:29.120 So I would agree

00:18:31.240 With you a little bit

00:18:32.440 A little bit

00:18:33.040 But I don't go

00:18:33.240 To the strip club

00:18:34.180 I don't wanna

00:18:34.940 Smell that shit in the air

00:18:35.920 Yeah

00:18:36.440 I guess that's true

00:18:37.560 I never really

00:18:38.740 I guess

00:18:39.160 Well I remember

00:18:39.780 The first time I ever went

00:18:40.740 Me and my friend Lance

00:18:41.620 Were in Louisville

00:18:42.900 And I was too young

00:18:44.480 To get in

00:18:44.940 But he could get in

00:18:45.840 So he'd go in

00:18:46.600 And tell me

00:18:47.000 What it looked like

00:18:47.700 And he'd come back out

00:18:48.540 And tell me

00:18:49.120 And you know

00:18:49.680 Show me the shape

00:18:51.440 Of the breast

00:18:51.940 With his hands

00:18:52.600 And everything like that

00:18:53.760 You know

00:18:54.260 He'd come in

00:18:55.240 And show you

00:18:55.740 Huh

00:18:56.460 Was you 10

00:18:57.280 No I was probably 16

00:18:58.920 But we tried

00:19:00.140 And they wouldn't let me in

00:19:01.140 So he'd just be

00:19:02.200 Describing everything to me

00:19:03.780 And I was sitting in the car

00:19:04.760 Did you get off with that

00:19:06.020 Had me a couple beers

00:19:07.000 I don't remember if I did

00:19:07.940 I probably did

00:19:08.700 At 16 having a couple beers

00:19:10.760 I mean I

00:19:11.740 You know

00:19:12.060 I was just

00:19:12.580 Because I had to stay

00:19:13.620 In the vehicle

00:19:14.200 You know

00:19:14.580 So he went inside

00:19:15.660 And he would come back out

00:19:16.800 And just check

00:19:17.280 I'm sorry

00:19:17.420 You drinking beers at 16

00:19:18.820 Yeah

00:19:19.440 Where you from

00:19:20.460 I'm from Louisiana

00:19:21.280 Oh no wonder

00:19:22.560 Y'all do

00:19:23.120 You probably

00:19:23.500 Putting hickeys

00:19:25.080 On alligator necks

00:19:26.160 At 16

00:19:26.740 Oh we did some

00:19:27.060 They definitely had a lot

00:19:28.180 I'm trying to think

00:19:28.760 We had a lot

00:19:29.120 We had a lot of

00:19:30.020 Different animals

00:19:30.740 In our area

00:19:31.380 Because I grew up

00:19:32.300 In an area

00:19:32.500 Nobody had pets

00:19:33.440 People just had animals

00:19:34.380 You know

00:19:34.780 Like you would just see

00:19:35.480 An animal in your neighborhood

00:19:36.660 You know

00:19:37.260 Like a cat

00:19:38.420 Or you would see somebody

00:19:39.280 Or just a dog

00:19:40.020 Would be there

00:19:40.740 You know

00:19:41.260 I didn't grow up

00:19:42.080 In an area

00:19:42.480 With a lot of like

00:19:43.500 Well they gave a fuck

00:19:44.760 About the animal

00:19:45.420 Oh dude

00:19:46.280 I remember

00:19:46.760 The first time I ever saw

00:19:48.100 A dog in somebody's house

00:19:49.920 Bro

00:19:50.180 And they loved it

00:19:51.080 That shit blew my mind

00:19:52.420 He said they loved it

00:19:54.480 It blew my mind

00:19:56.300 When I was coming up

00:19:57.360 You didn't

00:19:57.700 Dogs wasn't in the house

00:19:58.760 You could tie them up

00:19:59.420 To a tree

00:20:00.000 Yeah

00:20:00.360 And I think I did that bit

00:20:01.900 On my special

00:20:02.740 I was like

00:20:03.060 You do that shit now

00:20:03.920 You going to fucking jail

00:20:05.100 You can't tie the dogs

00:20:06.580 Up to the trees anymore

00:20:07.660 I mean dog houses

00:20:08.720 Are obsolete

00:20:10.380 You can't fucking use them

00:20:11.600 They literally gotta be

00:20:12.960 Treated like you

00:20:13.640 And I was like

00:20:14.040 Fuck you

00:20:14.560 You don't even work

00:20:16.180 Yeah

00:20:16.660 So why am I treating you

00:20:17.780 Like me

00:20:18.220 Yeah at least the dogs

00:20:19.320 In Alaska and stuff

00:20:20.300 They're doing sled

00:20:21.060 And they're doing work

00:20:21.860 During the day

00:20:22.520 But yeah

00:20:23.340 These just

00:20:23.740 A lot of local animals

00:20:25.160 Bro

00:20:25.420 They really just

00:20:26.380 A lot of them

00:20:27.020 Don't pull their weight

00:20:27.840 You know

00:20:28.360 Don't pull their weight

00:20:29.720 I don't think

00:20:30.960 You said they didn't

00:20:31.960 Have a home

00:20:32.560 So they just

00:20:33.360 Hanging out on the corner

00:20:34.180 Like the drunk

00:20:34.880 That's more normal

00:20:36.220 But once people

00:20:37.320 Got them inside

00:20:37.960 Yeah it definitely

00:20:38.600 Got a little bit weird

00:20:39.580 Keeps baby

00:20:40.560 You gotta keep it

00:20:41.580 You want it

00:20:42.620 You gotta keep it

00:20:43.200 Some people

00:20:43.560 A man can't grow

00:20:44.420 A mustache

00:20:44.960 Can't grow a full hair

00:20:45.980 Well

00:20:47.440 You can't lose it

00:20:49.320 You gotta hold on

00:20:50.680 To what you got

00:20:51.280 Remember that song

00:20:53.260 Hold on to what you got

00:20:55.420 I've never heard that song

00:20:56.760 But keeps

00:20:58.280 They'll help you

00:20:59.560 Two out of three men

00:21:00.300 Will experience

00:21:00.900 Some form of hair loss

00:21:02.440 By the time

00:21:03.240 They are 35

00:21:04.140 So

00:21:05.680 Keep what you have

00:21:07.460 Keeps offers

00:21:08.520 Convenient virtual

00:21:09.700 Doctor consultations

00:21:11.240 And medications

00:21:12.380 Delivered straight to your door

00:21:13.540 Every three months

00:21:15.200 So you're gonna have your meds

00:21:16.880 It's coming

00:21:17.300 It's discreet

00:21:18.440 Your neighbors are not gonna know

00:21:19.480 Oh gosh

00:21:20.460 Oh Harold's going bald

00:21:22.800 It's 24-7 care and support

00:21:25.240 Keeps has a network of expert

00:21:27.100 Medical advisors

00:21:28.120 Prescribers

00:21:29.460 And care specialists

00:21:31.540 To support you

00:21:32.860 In making your hair goals

00:21:34.680 Reality

00:21:35.820 Treatments start at just

00:21:37.360 $10 per month

00:21:38.480 And keeps

00:21:39.580 Offers generic versions

00:21:41.960 Of the two FDA approved medications

00:21:44.080 To prevent hair loss

00:21:45.360 I take the medications

00:21:46.620 I stay on them

00:21:47.700 You stay on them too

00:21:49.200 If you wanna keep it

00:21:50.360 If you're ready to take action

00:21:51.680 And prevent hair loss

00:21:52.640 Go to keeps.com

00:21:54.320 Slash T-H-E-O

00:21:55.800 To receive your first month

00:21:57.560 Of treatment for free

00:21:58.720 That's K-E-E-P-S

00:22:01.140 Dot com

00:22:02.040 Slash

00:22:02.580 Theo

00:22:03.220 To get your first month free

00:22:04.440 Keeps.com

00:22:05.700 Slash

00:22:06.240 Theo

00:22:06.660 This podcast is sponsored

00:22:08.500 By BetterHelp

00:22:09.780 Is there something

00:22:11.480 Interfering with your happiness

00:22:12.900 Think about that

00:22:14.800 Is there something

00:22:15.400 Interfering with your happiness

00:22:16.600 Can you manage it yourself

00:22:18.960 If you can't

00:22:20.940 Well

00:22:21.600 BetterHelp

00:22:22.640 Is available

00:22:23.720 BetterHelp

00:22:25.040 Will assess your needs

00:22:26.260 And match you

00:22:26.860 With your own licensed

00:22:27.860 Professional

00:22:28.760 Therapist

00:22:29.840 They want you to start

00:22:31.080 Living a happier life today

00:22:32.380 The service is available

00:22:33.900 For clients worldwide

00:22:35.060 You can log into your account

00:22:36.220 Anytime

00:22:36.680 And send a message

00:22:37.640 To your therapist

00:22:38.960 That's priceless

00:22:40.560 That immediate contact

00:22:42.860 Yep

00:22:44.380 Visit

00:22:45.320 BetterHelp.com

00:22:46.320 Slash

00:22:46.740 T-H-E-O

00:22:47.900 That's

00:22:48.220 Better

00:22:48.500 H-E-L-P

00:22:49.480 And join the over

00:22:50.700 2 million people

00:22:51.480 Who have taken charge

00:22:52.260 Of their mental health

00:22:53.120 With the help

00:22:53.960 Of an experienced professional

00:22:55.200 In fact

00:22:56.400 So many people

00:22:57.080 Have been using

00:22:57.560 BetterHelp

00:22:58.040 That they are

00:22:58.480 Recruiting additional

00:22:59.380 Therapists

00:22:59.920 In all 50 states

00:23:01.340 Special offer

00:23:02.560 For this past weekend

00:23:03.420 Listeners

00:23:04.180 Yep

00:23:04.580 That's you guys

00:23:05.300 If you're struggling

00:23:06.640 I've been there

00:23:08.000 I've used BetterHelp

00:23:09.180 Get 10% off your first month

00:23:11.040 At BetterHelp.com

00:23:12.220 Slash

00:23:12.880 T-H-E-O

00:23:14.300 Oh thank you

00:23:14.980 That's my gay daughter

00:23:16.060 She let me give her

00:23:16.960 Gay shout outs

00:23:17.740 Oh yeah she is

00:23:18.900 And she's very beautiful

00:23:20.260 We'll have to put her

00:23:20.840 Picture on her Instagram up

00:23:22.120 Yeah please do that

00:23:23.000 Okay dang

00:23:23.960 There you go

00:23:24.520 And so does she let you

00:23:25.820 Pick out any of the ladies

00:23:26.760 She likes

00:23:27.240 Or mother doesn't matter

00:23:28.380 Uh

00:23:29.260 She be picking out

00:23:30.180 Them rough bitches

00:23:31.540 She does?

00:23:32.300 Yeah

00:23:32.540 Them gang

00:23:33.720 What do you mean

00:23:34.960 Like the W

00:23:35.500 Like the sinners

00:23:36.340 No she just

00:23:40.520 I don't know

00:23:40.560 Or she rolling

00:23:41.060 With them shooting guards

00:23:42.180 Them shooting guards

00:23:43.860 No they be big bitches

00:23:45.000 Oh wow

00:23:45.820 They be

00:23:46.180 I don't know

00:23:47.120 She

00:23:47.380 We have a running joke

00:23:49.620 With her

00:23:49.820 She don't keep them long

00:23:50.840 Yeah

00:23:51.340 Yeah

00:23:51.760 They gotta make it

00:23:52.860 At three Thanksgiving

00:23:53.580 Before they really be

00:23:54.540 A part of the family

00:23:55.440 That makes sense

00:23:56.200 Kind of

00:23:56.540 I think that's realistic

00:23:57.600 Do um

00:23:58.960 Do a lot of

00:24:00.860 Do people keep being gay

00:24:03.720 A secret more

00:24:04.420 In black culture

00:24:05.120 Than they do

00:24:05.660 You think

00:24:06.180 I mean I only know

00:24:07.660 Really white culture

00:24:08.800 You know I was around

00:24:09.400 Black culture a lot

00:24:10.040 Growing up

00:24:10.440 But I wasn't black

00:24:11.220 So I could just guess

00:24:12.300 You know

00:24:13.120 If you're around

00:24:14.980 Black culture

00:24:15.560 You know black culture

00:24:17.100 I didn't grow around

00:24:19.080 White people

00:24:19.500 But I moved around

00:24:20.200 And I realized

00:24:21.140 They love leaving

00:24:21.880 Shit at your door

00:24:22.500 They bake for you

00:24:23.280 What was your question?

00:24:26.560 Yeah it's kind of like

00:24:27.280 Prison a little bit

00:24:28.320 They didn't bring you

00:24:29.180 A bake good

00:24:29.820 You know

00:24:30.220 I always bring you

00:24:30.900 Fucking bake good

00:24:31.740 I mean when I live

00:24:32.420 In Indiana

00:24:32.800 I'm like

00:24:33.320 God damn white people

00:24:34.380 Stop bringing shit

00:24:35.260 To the door

00:24:35.880 We ain't even

00:24:36.440 Eating this shit

00:24:37.200 But my neighbors

00:24:39.720 Were great in

00:24:40.400 Plainfield Indiana

00:24:41.380 What was your question?

00:24:43.180 Um

00:24:43.620 Do

00:24:44.460 Is it more

00:24:45.340 Is it being more secret?

00:24:47.360 It was

00:24:47.600 When I was coming up

00:24:48.940 They used to call them

00:24:49.520 Punks when I was coming up

00:24:50.880 You don't give a fuck

00:24:51.940 What you say do you?

00:24:53.120 I don't know

00:24:53.700 That's what they called them

00:24:57.340 When I was coming up

00:24:58.220 But like when my daughter

00:24:59.680 Came out

00:25:00.280 And I'm 50

00:25:01.220 So I would use the word

00:25:02.220 Bulldogger

00:25:02.860 And she was like

00:25:03.420 Mama you can't say

00:25:04.460 The word bulldogger

00:25:05.280 And I'm like

00:25:06.040 Why she say

00:25:06.580 Because nobody says

00:25:07.840 That anymore

00:25:08.240 And it's just like

00:25:08.940 A white person

00:25:09.440 Call you an n-word

00:25:10.300 And I was like

00:25:10.680 When the fuck

00:25:11.380 Did they change it to that?

00:25:13.100 So

00:25:13.280 On my sitcom

00:25:15.540 We did a whole episode

00:25:16.780 About using derogatory words

00:25:18.620 And you can't say stuff

00:25:20.140 Like

00:25:20.360 They're called lesbians

00:25:21.700 Uh huh

00:25:22.080 Or studs

00:25:23.020 So you can't say

00:25:23.760 Bulldoggers

00:25:24.360 And there's punks

00:25:25.180 And you can't call people

00:25:26.160 That stuff

00:25:26.440 Yeah you can't say it

00:25:26.720 You lose your fucking

00:25:27.540 You lose everything

00:25:29.140 Or you'll gain

00:25:30.500 A lot of people

00:25:31.080 That just believe

00:25:32.680 In just saying

00:25:33.160 Whatever they want

00:25:33.840 That's what I think

00:25:34.480 About you

00:25:35.000 I think

00:25:35.940 I'm a fan

00:25:37.020 Because she says

00:25:37.840 What she wants to say

00:25:39.040 I get the real her

00:25:40.780 Well I do

00:25:41.780 I do

00:25:42.380 But I'm not

00:25:43.120 If I find out

00:25:44.060 Something hurt you

00:25:45.120 Right

00:25:45.420 I'm not gonna say it

00:25:46.520 Like

00:25:46.940 I tell you

00:25:47.700 When I moved to Indiana

00:25:48.680 To be honest with you

00:25:49.700 I had never heard

00:25:50.280 Of the word cunt

00:25:51.100 And I was at a comedy club

00:25:53.640 And this black

00:25:54.240 This comedian called

00:25:55.400 This white lady

00:25:55.880 A cunt

00:25:56.320 And she just boo-hoo

00:25:57.960 And I was like

00:25:58.800 What the fuck is a cunt

00:25:59.740 And why is she crying like that

00:26:00.920 And she

00:26:01.520 And one of the comedians

00:26:02.580 Like

00:26:02.740 That is like a black man

00:26:03.760 Call you a bitch

00:26:04.420 I was like

00:26:04.780 Hold on white girl

00:26:05.660 Stop crying

00:26:06.140 Let's whoop this

00:26:06.680 Motherfucker ass

00:26:07.480 But I didn't know that

00:26:09.480 So if I know that you

00:26:10.780 If I know something

00:26:11.640 Is gonna hurt you

00:26:12.600 I won't say it

00:26:14.140 To you know

00:26:14.700 To hurt your feelings

00:26:15.700 So I'm not gonna say

00:26:17.220 The F word

00:26:17.960 I'm not gonna

00:26:18.620 I'm not gonna call

00:26:20.000 A lesbian a bulldogger

00:26:21.440 Because that is derogatory

00:26:22.720 But you know

00:26:23.920 If I'm at the house

00:26:24.720 My daughter might get everything

00:26:26.180 Yeah

00:26:26.500 And that's okay

00:26:27.640 That's different

00:26:28.640 Yeah that's different

00:26:29.580 That's different

00:26:30.040 Yeah I think people

00:26:30.860 Don't delineate

00:26:31.680 Kind of what is different

00:26:32.560 Or what isn't different

00:26:33.500 You know

00:26:33.920 Yeah you don't wanna do anything

00:26:35.680 You know to hurt anybody

00:26:36.900 But words have changed

00:26:38.360 You know I think

00:26:39.260 I think this generation

00:26:40.480 Of people is a lot softer

00:26:42.800 Yeah

00:26:43.700 You know they can't take

00:26:44.400 The shit we used to take

00:26:45.320 You know they out

00:26:46.500 You know when we got bullied

00:26:47.840 We just fucking got bullied

00:26:49.620 And fucking dealt with it

00:26:50.760 And showed the bullet

00:26:51.760 20 years later

00:26:52.580 When they fat in the head

00:26:53.540 All the kids doing shit

00:26:54.520 These kids here

00:26:55.580 Immediately you know

00:26:56.900 Can't take

00:26:57.980 Criticism and stuff like that

00:27:01.260 They you know

00:27:02.260 They wanna jump off

00:27:02.980 A fucking bridge

00:27:03.760 I know

00:27:04.240 You know it's like

00:27:05.360 Times have changed so much

00:27:07.440 Where back in the day

00:27:08.600 When you were working

00:27:09.160 I don't know if it was

00:27:10.040 Hidden from us

00:27:11.020 Or we just

00:27:12.320 You know

00:27:12.940 We just see it more now

00:27:14.780 Like cry babies

00:27:16.320 Oh that's interesting

00:27:17.380 Yeah because before

00:27:18.340 If somebody took their life

00:27:19.620 Or something

00:27:20.100 We didn't really hear about it

00:27:21.340 We didn't know

00:27:21.780 And now it's like boom

00:27:22.940 In your face

00:27:23.800 You know

00:27:24.220 This person

00:27:25.140 Like why

00:27:25.960 You know life is beautiful

00:27:27.320 But then

00:27:27.860 Mental illness

00:27:29.560 Was not a

00:27:30.440 Forefront

00:27:32.020 Like it is today

00:27:33.040 Mental illness

00:27:33.640 Used to be hilarious

00:27:34.420 Man you see somebody

00:27:35.140 That's mentally ill

00:27:35.740 You're like fuck dog

00:27:37.000 They really racked up

00:27:37.880 It was your uncles

00:27:38.600 And you know

00:27:39.560 You wanted to hear them talk

00:27:40.380 Yeah every uncle

00:27:41.000 Every uncle was mentally ill

00:27:43.360 Not every

00:27:44.220 But a lot of them man

00:27:46.060 60%

00:27:46.980 70%

00:27:47.980 Yeah we had a few

00:27:48.980 That was you know

00:27:49.820 But now you can't

00:27:51.020 Pick at this stuff anymore

00:27:52.120 Yeah

00:27:52.440 You gotta say

00:27:53.060 What the hell

00:27:54.360 Is wrong with this person

00:27:54.620 Oh yeah Rodney's not doing well

00:27:56.260 You gotta say stuff like that

00:27:57.700 Yeah

00:27:58.060 Yeah

00:27:58.600 So times just have changed

00:28:00.240 And you know

00:28:00.580 We had to put a

00:28:01.560 I think the world

00:28:03.600 Has held us to caring

00:28:05.420 A little bit more

00:28:06.520 Caring about each other

00:28:07.520 You think

00:28:07.920 We should

00:28:09.320 But yeah

00:28:09.920 It's trying to get there

00:28:11.020 Yeah

00:28:11.360 I think that's a good point

00:28:12.520 I think it is trying to get there

00:28:13.780 Do you think

00:28:14.980 Oh what was Halloween like

00:28:16.360 In a black community

00:28:17.120 What was that

00:28:17.640 I always wonder what that's like

00:28:19.400 It's like

00:28:22.180 I've heard comedian

00:28:24.120 Makes jokes about

00:28:25.000 You go to the white neighborhood

00:28:26.420 To get the big Snickers

00:28:27.500 But it was like

00:28:31.440 You just

00:28:31.820 Like every other Halloween

00:28:33.100 I don't think

00:28:33.900 I know in my community

00:28:35.980 They didn't go out on costumes

00:28:37.680 Like they do today

00:28:38.640 And I think it had a lot to do with

00:28:40.620 People couldn't afford them

00:28:41.740 Or they really wasn't into them

00:28:43.200 Yeah

00:28:43.460 And like my mother-in-law

00:28:44.980 She didn't believe in Halloween

00:28:46.200 Because she thought it was

00:28:47.100 The devil's day

00:28:47.940 Damn yeah

00:28:48.380 Because she was super Christian

00:28:49.840 And shit

00:28:50.320 So you wasn't

00:28:51.500 They wasn't allowed to go

00:28:52.660 Trick or treating

00:28:53.420 And put on costumes

00:28:54.720 And shit like that

00:28:55.500 But we were just going out

00:28:56.480 Regular clothes

00:28:57.280 Yeah

00:28:57.680 Yeah oh that's interesting

00:28:59.980 Yeah I think

00:29:01.000 We used to get like

00:29:02.060 Oh my dad was real old

00:29:03.160 My dad was 70

00:29:03.980 When I was born

00:29:04.480 He was an old man

00:29:05.200 Your daddy was 70

00:29:07.260 Yeah he was 70

00:29:08.540 He was born in 1910

00:29:09.820 Right so he was real old

00:29:10.940 So he

00:29:12.220 How the hell did that happen

00:29:13.360 Your mom was selling pussy

00:29:14.580 No she was just giving it out

00:29:16.500 And uh

00:29:18.060 But how old was your mother

00:29:19.000 32

00:29:19.860 My mother was 32

00:29:20.780 Was your daddy rich

00:29:22.000 No

00:29:22.500 And that's the crazy part

00:29:24.540 Was they in Tennessee

00:29:26.220 No they was in Louisiana

00:29:27.940 Are you serious

00:29:29.620 Yeah

00:29:30.000 Your mama

00:29:31.340 Fucked a 90 year old

00:29:32.980 I mean a 70 year old

00:29:33.920 70 yeah yeah

00:29:34.500 70

00:29:34.880 And he was a handsome guy

00:29:36.360 But how long was he around

00:29:37.780 After you was born

00:29:38.600 Two weeks

00:29:39.040 86

00:29:39.540 Yeah yeah yeah

00:29:40.760 Your mama gave birth

00:29:46.740 And your daddy died

00:29:47.640 God damn

00:29:49.280 It felt like it man

00:29:53.600 He was

00:29:53.920 Every time

00:29:54.500 Every day I saw him

00:29:55.540 I was like

00:29:55.740 Damn he's getting smaller

00:29:56.900 And smaller

00:29:57.420 He's about to meet me

00:29:58.340 In the middle

00:29:58.940 That's what I felt like

00:30:00.700 Your daddy was 86

00:30:02.120 Yeah he was old

00:30:03.300 How old was you when he died

00:30:04.160 16

00:30:05.160 So I was getting pretty old

00:30:07.760 But um

00:30:08.880 Jesus fucking Christ

00:30:10.340 Yeah so it was

00:30:11.320 Why your mama say she

00:30:12.440 I'm interested

00:30:13.140 Why your mama would fuck

00:30:14.040 Somebody that old

00:30:14.840 I don't know

00:30:15.040 Did she need her

00:30:15.880 Did she need her

00:30:16.620 Fucking trailer

00:30:17.400 Paid for some shit

00:30:18.520 I don't know what she needed

00:30:19.440 My mother doesn't say

00:30:21.080 Anything about it

00:30:21.660 Yes she doesn't say

00:30:22.560 Anything about it

00:30:23.440 Is you the only

00:30:24.080 Well of course you

00:30:24.960 The only child

00:30:25.440 No we got four children

00:30:25.960 I got two younger sisters

00:30:27.060 Not by that old man

00:30:27.700 Yeah

00:30:27.920 Not by that old man

00:30:29.760 You might need to

00:30:30.800 Check your DNA

00:30:31.480 I guarantee you

00:30:32.600 That was a younger

00:30:33.520 Nigga up the street

00:30:34.360 A younger person

00:30:35.560 Up the street baby

00:30:36.600 And your mama

00:30:37.420 She just put it on

00:30:38.100 That old man

00:30:38.700 Because he was

00:30:39.140 Taking care of the house

00:30:39.960 Maybe

00:30:40.460 I don't know

00:30:40.840 He wasn't taking care

00:30:41.500 Of much man

00:30:42.220 Dude the best things

00:30:43.420 I'm trying to think

00:30:44.200 My dad bought a cutlass

00:30:46.540 Right because we lived

00:30:47.220 Right we lived in

00:30:47.840 Like in a black

00:30:48.400 And white neighborhood

00:30:48.980 So my dad bought

00:30:50.000 A cutlass from a couple

00:30:51.460 Brothers around the corner

00:30:52.340 From us and it had

00:30:53.180 Like 22's in the trunk

00:30:54.600 Right so he

00:30:56.860 And he was

00:30:57.560 He couldn't even hear

00:30:58.800 Right so

00:30:59.740 He would drive around

00:31:00.800 Listening to Paul Harvey

00:31:01.820 You remember that guy

00:31:02.480 On the radio

00:31:03.020 Who did like

00:31:03.740 The weather report

00:31:04.600 And it was like

00:31:05.020 Paul Harvey

00:31:05.720 Like the old

00:31:06.400 Dude he would listen to

00:31:08.740 It would just

00:31:09.600 It had a ton of bass though

00:31:11.100 It would be like

00:31:11.520 The weather and like

00:31:12.600 It was like AM radio

00:31:14.900 And shit he would listen to

00:31:15.940 Rush Limbaugh

00:31:16.620 Just boom boom

00:31:18.080 You heard that it was

00:31:18.760 Rush Limbaugh person

00:31:19.880 Yeah but he would listen to it

00:31:21.120 With like a ton of bass though

00:31:22.360 It's different when you hear it

00:31:23.320 With bass

00:31:23.740 I bet it is

00:31:25.160 He's screaming

00:31:26.640 He's screaming to a beat

00:31:28.060 Yeah yeah

00:31:28.880 But it was a little bit

00:31:31.360 Different that was

00:31:32.000 Interesting I guess

00:31:33.100 I can't get over

00:31:35.360 Your daddy

00:31:35.920 Who was your granddad

00:31:37.260 Oh my grandfather

00:31:38.940 Was born in 1880

00:31:40.160 Which is crazy

00:31:41.020 That's wild

00:31:41.660 Him and your daddy

00:31:42.760 Went to school together

00:31:43.620 Was he alive

00:31:45.020 When you were born

00:31:46.320 No no

00:31:47.100 He was gone

00:31:47.760 That's the only reason

00:31:48.920 Why your daddy

00:31:49.460 Got your mama

00:31:50.140 Because your granddaddy

00:31:51.440 Had already died

00:31:52.360 Shit I've heard

00:31:54.540 Fucking for rent money

00:31:55.840 But that's a little

00:31:56.780 That's fucking for social security

00:31:58.280 Yeah that's the crazy part

00:31:59.440 I was like

00:31:59.900 Whose fuck

00:32:00.460 Why

00:32:00.980 I wouldn't

00:32:01.740 I just didn't understand

00:32:02.840 Your mama still alive

00:32:03.460 Yeah she's still alive

00:32:04.500 Don't tell me

00:32:05.360 She got another old man

00:32:06.380 Oh no

00:32:07.100 She married another guy

00:32:08.340 But he was only 20 years older

00:32:09.540 But he ended up

00:32:10.640 Passing away

00:32:11.280 But

00:32:11.640 Everybody died

00:32:12.880 With your mama

00:32:13.360 Too though

00:32:13.780 Shoot

00:32:14.680 Your mama like

00:32:15.600 That soft dick

00:32:16.500 Yeah

00:32:16.840 She got like soft dick

00:32:21.820 How the fuck

00:32:22.800 A seven year old

00:32:24.120 One man get

00:32:24.880 Nah

00:32:25.500 I don't know

00:32:26.260 Do um

00:32:27.440 Yeah I guess

00:32:28.580 Maybe people's penises

00:32:29.540 Get softer over time

00:32:30.860 I don't know

00:32:31.420 I'm not sure

00:32:33.980 I just know how much

00:32:37.040 I mean I know how

00:32:37.700 You know my own penis

00:32:38.700 Over my own time

00:32:39.540 But

00:32:39.780 How old are you Theo

00:32:41.380 I'm 40 years old

00:32:42.380 I'm 41

00:32:42.900 It's coming

00:32:44.060 Damn

00:32:44.640 I don't want that man

00:32:47.900 Nobody wants it

00:32:49.540 But

00:32:49.760 It can't stay hard forever

00:32:51.480 Damn

00:32:51.820 I'm telling you

00:32:52.600 If that's your daddy

00:32:53.900 Your mama swallowing

00:32:54.880 I don't mean to be mean

00:32:56.780 But I just don't see

00:32:57.980 No 70 year old man

00:32:59.320 Back

00:32:59.960 Back

00:33:00.860 What even no Viagra

00:33:02.160 To help your daddy out

00:33:03.200 Back then

00:33:03.680 So you got it

00:33:04.300 So if they had no Viagra

00:33:05.240 He was doing that

00:33:05.880 On sheer willpower

00:33:06.840 And there's something

00:33:07.320 Beautiful about that

00:33:08.220 No

00:33:08.800 Ain't no 70 year old man

00:33:10.640 You lying Theo

00:33:11.620 That ain't your daddy

00:33:12.200 I swear to God

00:33:13.180 It is

00:33:13.340 I'm telling them brothers

00:33:14.200 Sold your daddy

00:33:14.860 That car

00:33:15.380 Might be your daddy

00:33:16.840 Cause you talk like a brother too

00:33:19.820 You just got that Joe Dirk

00:33:21.040 I got a big ass

00:33:21.980 Baby

00:33:22.240 I do have kind of a big ass

00:33:23.620 You know

00:33:23.920 I will say that

00:33:24.700 Black men ain't got no big ass

00:33:26.620 I'm just saying

00:33:27.280 You might need to check your DNA

00:33:29.180 You might be a little bit of black

00:33:30.840 Oh dude

00:33:31.520 I'll take a little

00:33:32.300 Yeah

00:33:32.820 I'll take a little

00:33:34.340 If I could get it

00:33:35.140 You know

00:33:35.500 I wonder how you get that white kid

00:33:37.520 That gets really obsessed

00:33:39.120 With black culture

00:33:39.940 Like you know

00:33:40.680 It's

00:33:41.620 It's funner

00:33:42.920 It's like

00:33:43.820 It's the cool thing to do

00:33:45.120 And I felt like those kids

00:33:46.700 You know

00:33:47.260 I just like

00:33:47.880 We rode on the same bus

00:33:49.480 It's funny because you say

00:33:51.080 Your daddy listened to Rush Limbaugh

00:33:52.900 Yeah but that was him

00:33:54.100 That's cause I think

00:33:54.940 That was just another senior citizen

00:33:56.340 You know

00:33:56.900 But

00:33:57.960 He didn't try to spill that over

00:33:59.240 Into your life

00:34:00.000 No he wasn't

00:34:01.340 No

00:34:02.500 No my dad wasn't racist

00:34:04.100 I think he was just a Republican

00:34:05.200 But he wasn't

00:34:05.780 He wasn't like a racist guy

00:34:07.100 Our family wasn't like

00:34:08.420 Our family wasn't like

00:34:09.760 Redneck or anything

00:34:10.720 My dad was from Nicaragua

00:34:12.580 And my mom was from Illinois

00:34:14.080 But

00:34:15.140 But how the fuck you end up

00:34:16.140 With the redneck haircut

00:34:17.180 It only look good on you

00:34:19.520 Cause you been rocking

00:34:20.220 That shit for a long time

00:34:21.420 Thank you baby

00:34:21.440 Yeah I like that

00:34:22.580 See you coming around now

00:34:24.060 No you remind me

00:34:24.980 Of Vanilla Ice

00:34:25.840 You coming around

00:34:26.900 Ice

00:34:28.380 Ice baby

00:34:29.300 Ice

00:34:31.040 I love that fucking song

00:34:32.200 It was good huh

00:34:32.940 Well I heard you talking about

00:34:33.920 You used to watch

00:34:34.540 Leave it to Beaver

00:34:35.420 I grew up watching

00:34:36.400 Yeah I used to like

00:34:37.220 Live through the television shows

00:34:38.700 Yeah

00:34:39.160 So how do you think

00:34:39.920 If you grew up like

00:34:40.680 In such an environment

00:34:41.620 That was probably so dangerous

00:34:43.080 What do you really think

00:34:44.340 I know you talked about

00:34:44.960 That teacher

00:34:45.340 It wasn't dangerous

00:34:45.400 It was poor

00:34:46.040 Oh okay

00:34:46.860 Yeah yeah sorry

00:34:47.640 Cause you gotta think

00:34:49.460 If you know black culture

00:34:51.760 Back in those days

00:34:53.100 We wasn't

00:34:53.720 All of this black on black

00:34:55.160 Violin wasn't happening

00:34:56.100 That didn't happen

00:34:56.720 To crack hit the black community

00:34:58.080 Yeah

00:34:58.440 Then that shit happened

00:34:59.760 So when I was growing up

00:35:01.420 That's crazy

00:35:02.180 It was just

00:35:02.960 Poverty

00:35:04.040 It was just poverty

00:35:05.820 That's what it was

00:35:06.940 You know

00:35:08.120 When you poor like that

00:35:09.860 As a kid

00:35:10.480 You really don't know

00:35:11.640 You poor

00:35:12.300 Until you grow up

00:35:13.380 And then look

00:35:13.940 And society tell you

00:35:15.000 Cause a lot of shit

00:35:15.980 I didn't really learn

00:35:17.400 That was wrong

00:35:18.120 Until I became

00:35:19.800 Until I opened my mouth

00:35:20.760 About it

00:35:21.140 And I became a comedian

00:35:22.080 And I was like

00:35:22.700 People like

00:35:23.380 I didn't grow up like that

00:35:24.760 And I was like

00:35:25.260 You didn't grow up like that

00:35:26.260 Your mama didn't cook

00:35:27.100 In the fireplace

00:35:27.780 What the fuck

00:35:28.820 Is your mama doing

00:35:29.360 Cooking in the fireplace

00:35:30.120 Cause we didn't have no gas

00:35:31.520 Nigga

00:35:31.900 So you know

00:35:35.020 It was just poverty

00:35:36.240 We were just poor as hell

00:35:37.540 Yeah

00:35:37.980 Being poor creates

00:35:39.240 The most fun though

00:35:40.000 Cause you gotta be

00:35:40.660 Around each other more

00:35:41.980 You don't have things

00:35:42.980 That occupy your time

00:35:43.960 I think you see more shit

00:35:45.440 You do see more shit

00:35:46.940 You learn

00:35:47.420 You learn

00:35:48.140 Something called survivor

00:35:49.580 Yeah

00:35:50.000 Less stuff is hidden from you

00:35:51.820 So I think

00:35:53.120 When you're wealthy

00:35:53.680 You get to hide more

00:35:54.680 You hide from other people

00:35:55.800 You can hide more from

00:35:57.280 You get hedges

00:35:58.340 You get a yard

00:35:59.180 You get distance between

00:36:00.540 You get separate bedrooms

00:36:02.080 You get all these things

00:36:03.220 Where like

00:36:03.760 Everything is kinda hidden

00:36:05.220 Where I feel like

00:36:05.820 We don't have it

00:36:06.820 They would just walk down

00:36:08.160 We had a yard

00:36:09.400 And we just walk down

00:36:10.820 Wait a minute Theo

00:36:13.800 We out had everything

00:36:14.800 Rich people had

00:36:15.840 It just didn't look

00:36:16.820 As good as they shit did

00:36:18.360 Yeah

00:36:18.720 And we just cooked

00:36:20.220 In a fireplace

00:36:20.980 But yeah

00:36:21.500 I think

00:36:22.140 When you're wealthy

00:36:23.800 You know

00:36:25.760 A lot more is given

00:36:27.380 You know

00:36:28.520 And when you're poor

00:36:29.740 You gotta earn a lot more

00:36:31.380 Yeah

00:36:31.980 Even with my kids

00:36:33.720 I mean I'm not rich

00:36:34.600 Or no shit like that

00:36:35.440 But you know

00:36:36.100 But y'all getting fancier

00:36:37.180 Is it harder to put

00:36:38.100 Not pat

00:36:38.540 Is it harder to make your kids

00:36:39.940 Have the same struggle

00:36:41.060 That you had

00:36:41.640 Is that tough

00:36:42.280 Well they don't have

00:36:43.500 The same struggle

00:36:44.280 Because their struggle

00:36:45.140 Ain't there no more

00:36:46.040 So

00:36:46.300 I have to learn

00:36:48.980 To say no

00:36:49.640 I was like

00:36:50.940 Go get your own shit

00:36:51.920 Don't tell me

00:36:52.440 What you can't do

00:36:52.980 When your mama's sitting here

00:36:53.780 With an 8th grade education

00:36:55.140 And a GED

00:36:55.780 And look what the fuck I did

00:36:57.140 Now what the fuck

00:36:57.720 You gonna do

00:36:58.380 And I don't have a problem

00:37:01.260 With telling them no

00:37:01.960 Get the fuck on

00:37:03.340 Give my money

00:37:03.980 No I'm not gonna do that for you

00:37:05.660 I'm gonna show you

00:37:06.740 How to do it for yourself

00:37:08.140 Which one

00:37:09.460 And how many children

00:37:10.120 Do you have of your own

00:37:10.760 I have four

00:37:11.760 35, 34, 22, and 23

00:37:15.240 And which one was probably

00:37:16.880 Was it giving birth

00:37:19.560 Do you

00:37:20.000 Tell me about that

00:37:20.980 Do you ever have any crazy

00:37:21.880 Giving birth days

00:37:22.740 Like days where you had to

00:37:23.680 Go to the hospital

00:37:24.140 And give birth

00:37:24.620 Because I know you had a wild

00:37:25.500 You had like a wild

00:37:26.460 You've had a wild life

00:37:27.380 You know

00:37:27.640 Very wild compared

00:37:28.760 To a lot of folks

00:37:29.660 Well

00:37:30.220 My first one I had at 14

00:37:32.760 That was real easy

00:37:33.500 Damn

00:37:34.060 She popped out

00:37:35.100 I can't even think about that

00:37:36.280 It feels illegal

00:37:36.940 For me to even think

00:37:37.840 About that birthday

00:37:38.840 Damn bro

00:37:40.920 I can't even look

00:37:41.880 At pictures from that

00:37:42.700 That's crazy

00:37:43.580 I know right

00:37:44.440 But I gave birth at 14

00:37:45.920 And that was the easiest

00:37:47.640 Pregnance ever

00:37:48.380 I mean

00:37:48.760 She literally popped out

00:37:50.300 And I was riding my bicycles

00:37:51.460 In three days

00:37:52.260 Wow

00:37:52.700 How big was she

00:37:54.860 You think

00:37:55.200 She was nine pounds

00:37:56.380 And my last child

00:37:57.440 Was ten two

00:37:58.120 He really hurt

00:37:59.780 And he always been like that

00:38:01.760 Kind of a pain a little

00:38:02.720 Well

00:38:03.540 You know

00:38:04.200 A lot of parents

00:38:05.160 Don't tell you this

00:38:06.000 But I always tell them

00:38:07.180 I said

00:38:07.440 I love all of my kids

00:38:08.600 But every parent

00:38:09.540 Got a favorite kid

00:38:10.540 And that last one

00:38:11.380 Is my favorite

00:38:12.060 Yeah

00:38:12.420 And you tell it

00:38:13.560 Oh yeah

00:38:14.180 I tell them

00:38:14.600 I said

00:38:14.820 I love all y'all

00:38:15.520 But this one

00:38:15.980 Is my favorite right here

00:38:16.880 What makes him a favorite

00:38:18.740 I think

00:38:19.520 Because he was the last one

00:38:20.780 He was ten two

00:38:21.700 And that my husband

00:38:24.100 Didn't have any kids

00:38:25.100 When I met him

00:38:26.080 So he took care of

00:38:26.960 My two kids

00:38:27.960 And my sister

00:38:28.440 Four kids

00:38:29.020 And then I had a daughter

00:38:30.220 By him

00:38:30.800 And then when I had

00:38:32.040 My last one

00:38:32.740 Was a boy

00:38:33.320 And I wanted to

00:38:33.960 Name it after him

00:38:34.620 And I kind of think

00:38:35.240 That's why Junebug

00:38:36.040 Is my favorite

00:38:36.700 Because he's a junior

00:38:38.240 Oh yeah

00:38:39.180 Yeah we had a Junebug

00:38:41.040 Bus growing up

00:38:41.920 We had a kid

00:38:42.460 Named Junebug

00:38:43.300 Junebug was everywhere

00:38:44.900 Everybody got a Junebug

00:38:46.280 Oh really

00:38:46.700 I think so

00:38:48.140 Yeah

00:38:48.660 I'm trying to think

00:38:49.960 We used to have

00:38:50.380 I was always envious

00:38:51.200 Black people

00:38:51.540 Had their cool

00:38:52.060 Exciting names

00:38:53.080 But I had Theo

00:38:54.160 And I got to meet

00:38:54.700 Malcolm Jamal Warner

00:38:55.780 One time

00:38:56.280 And I told him

00:38:56.920 That my name was Theo

00:38:58.060 He didn't really care

00:38:58.700 But that's alright

00:38:59.880 That's alright

00:39:02.980 I told him my name

00:39:04.160 Theo

00:39:04.460 He's like

00:39:04.760 He ain't really care

00:39:05.360 He's like

00:39:05.560 Why should he care

00:39:07.000 Okay

00:39:07.380 I don't know

00:39:07.940 What the fuck

00:39:08.820 You want me to do

00:39:09.500 Because you

00:39:09.840 Hey

00:39:10.360 Anybody can be named Theo

00:39:11.960 I probably gave you

00:39:13.040 That same reaction

00:39:13.760 What the fuck

00:39:14.300 You want me to say

00:39:15.080 Well I'll say this

00:39:21.340 Business is off

00:39:22.300 To a good start

00:39:23.020 This year

00:39:23.500 You know

00:39:24.240 We're doing business

00:39:25.120 And you know

00:39:25.480 Who else's business

00:39:26.300 Did well last year

00:39:27.560 Santa

00:39:28.700 That's right

00:39:30.380 And when he can't

00:39:32.140 Bring all the gifts

00:39:33.240 He ships them

00:39:34.400 He uses

00:39:34.960 Ship Station

00:39:35.800 Online

00:39:37.440 Shipping isn't

00:39:38.460 Slowing down

00:39:39.120 Anytime soon

00:39:40.420 Brook and mortal

00:39:41.940 Stores are

00:39:42.760 Disappearing

00:39:43.660 Everybody

00:39:44.740 In the mail

00:39:45.520 Everybody

00:39:46.540 Is your business

00:39:48.640 Ready to keep up the pace

00:39:50.640 That's a great question

00:39:51.680 Ask yourself

00:39:52.380 If you don't have a business

00:39:53.760 Ask yourself anyway

00:39:54.880 Man

00:39:55.260 Who cares

00:39:56.200 Ship Station

00:39:58.800 Is already trusted

00:39:59.560 By over 100,000

00:40:01.120 E-commerce sellers

00:40:02.400 Those are businesses

00:40:03.680 You can keep track

00:40:05.160 Of orders

00:40:05.680 From any sales channel

00:40:06.640 Find the best shipping carrier

00:40:08.180 With deeply discounted rates

00:40:09.740 And automate

00:40:10.780 Just about any shipping task

00:40:12.280 With just a few clicks

00:40:14.000 Save time

00:40:15.240 By funneling all your orders

00:40:16.300 Into one simple interface

00:40:17.400 No matter what you're selling

00:40:18.520 Whether it's through Amazon

00:40:20.580 Etsy

00:40:21.100 Or your own website

00:40:22.060 Ship Station

00:40:23.020 Makes it easy

00:40:24.300 Ship more in less time

00:40:26.620 With Ship Station

00:40:27.280 Use my offer code

00:40:28.580 T-H-E-O

00:40:29.580 To get a 60 day

00:40:31.200 Free trial

00:40:32.280 That's two months

00:40:33.540 Of no hassle

00:40:34.740 Stress free shipping

00:40:35.640 Just go to

00:40:36.400 ShipStation.com

00:40:38.020 Click on the microphone

00:40:39.320 At the top of the page

00:40:40.440 And type in

00:40:41.440 T-H-E-O

00:40:43.000 Ship Station

00:40:44.120 Make ship happen

00:40:45.140 It's the beginning

00:40:46.700 Of a new year

00:40:47.660 That's right

00:40:48.680 It is the beginning

00:40:49.760 Of a new year

00:40:50.780 So there's never been

00:40:51.540 A better time

00:40:52.200 To get back in shape

00:40:54.100 Have you thought about that?

00:40:56.480 That's right

00:40:57.220 And you can start the year off

00:40:58.820 With a 25%

00:41:00.300 Off

00:41:00.980 A FitBod membership

00:41:03.180 Yep

00:41:04.780 It's

00:41:05.180 You know

00:41:05.840 Springtime

00:41:06.800 Is when you want to

00:41:07.260 Get ready for summer

00:41:07.920 Summer's coming

00:41:08.500 So if you put yourself

00:41:10.380 On a you know

00:41:10.920 A 6-8 week plan

00:41:12.620 You can be ready

00:41:14.220 To have

00:41:16.200 A little bit more

00:41:17.600 Body comfort

00:41:18.340 In the summer

00:41:18.860 Some of my fitness

00:41:20.940 Goals this year

00:41:21.660 To get my shoulders

00:41:22.920 Back

00:41:23.340 And to

00:41:24.760 Do yoga

00:41:25.920 And also

00:41:28.220 Do push ups

00:41:29.100 And I've been doing them

00:41:30.200 And you know

00:41:31.180 Who can help you do them

00:41:32.060 FitBod

00:41:33.060 That's right

00:41:33.840 FitBod's algorithm

00:41:35.420 Uses data

00:41:36.120 To create and adjust

00:41:37.160 A dynamic fitness plan

00:41:38.540 Just for you

00:41:39.520 You'll have access

00:41:40.780 To your own

00:41:41.300 Personalized routine

00:41:42.520 On their easy to use

00:41:44.080 Mobile app

00:41:44.700 So you can start

00:41:45.320 Making progress

00:41:46.260 On your goals

00:41:47.120 Anytime

00:41:48.180 Anywhere

00:41:49.540 Now that's one thing

00:41:50.640 That I do think

00:41:51.200 Is pretty fascinating

00:41:52.200 About FitBod

00:41:53.000 Is the way they're able

00:41:54.680 To curtail it

00:41:55.960 To you

00:41:57.320 A lot of

00:41:58.960 Different programs

00:41:59.780 Can't do that

00:42:00.480 Kick the new year

00:42:01.620 Off right

00:42:02.340 And get started

00:42:03.160 On your customized

00:42:03.900 Fitness plan

00:42:04.740 From FitBod

00:42:06.160 Whether you exercise

00:42:07.240 Three days a week

00:42:08.040 Or twice a day

00:42:08.860 Every workout

00:42:09.800 Is scientifically

00:42:10.960 Proven

00:42:11.840 To be better

00:42:12.860 Than the last

00:42:13.520 Get 25%

00:42:15.060 Off your membership

00:42:16.020 Now when you sign up

00:42:16.940 At FitBod

00:42:18.100 Dot M-E

00:42:19.320 Slash T-H-E-O

00:42:21.340 That's 25%

00:42:22.760 Off your membership

00:42:23.540 At FitBod

00:42:25.840 F-I-T-B-O-D

00:42:27.480 Dot M-E

00:42:28.280 Slash Theo

00:42:29.580 You got any kids

00:42:30.820 No

00:42:31.660 I would like to get one

00:42:32.580 I've been

00:42:32.820 I get

00:42:33.520 I'm ready I think

00:42:34.520 To get married

00:42:35.100 I think

00:42:35.540 I'm talking about

00:42:36.800 Having a

00:42:37.160 Getting a wife

00:42:37.960 You talking about

00:42:39.600 Getting a wife

00:42:40.060 Are you dating Theo

00:42:41.000 I'm doing a little bit

00:42:41.820 Of light dating

00:42:42.420 But I'm ready to really

00:42:43.300 I think

00:42:43.760 Step it up

00:42:44.500 Really

00:42:45.400 I think so

00:42:46.180 I'm ready

00:42:46.680 I'm ready to have

00:42:48.020 A couple children

00:42:48.800 Maybe

00:42:49.240 Are you

00:42:50.200 You dating more

00:42:51.980 Than one woman

00:42:52.680 Are you dating

00:42:53.180 One woman

00:42:53.800 I'm dating a little bit

00:42:54.960 Of more than one

00:42:55.740 You know

00:42:56.740 You just gonna say

00:42:57.680 That on your podcast

00:42:58.380 Like these hoes

00:42:59.040 Don't listen to your podcast

00:42:59.900 Okay

00:43:00.300 I don't think

00:43:01.800 I mean I date

00:43:02.420 I'm still looking

00:43:03.260 You know

00:43:03.700 I'm still looking

00:43:04.740 How'd you know

00:43:05.520 When you met your husband

00:43:06.340 That he was the one

00:43:07.300 He had a good job

00:43:09.040 Back teeth

00:43:09.640 And he didn't hit

00:43:10.320 Bitches in the eye

00:43:10.960 On Friday

00:43:11.460 Damn

00:43:11.940 But I knew he was the one

00:43:13.860 He was a nice guy

00:43:14.760 Really

00:43:15.140 Did you know him

00:43:15.520 Right from the beginning

00:43:16.300 Or it took a little few dates

00:43:17.500 I liked him

00:43:18.700 So you know

00:43:20.220 He just came over

00:43:21.440 And we went out

00:43:22.780 A couple times

00:43:23.340 But I liked him

00:43:24.300 When I first saw him

00:43:25.260 What can a man do

00:43:26.760 You think

00:43:27.160 If out of the gate

00:43:28.220 He's kind of like

00:43:28.920 In that gray zone

00:43:29.880 What can he do

00:43:31.380 On that second

00:43:32.040 Third date

00:43:32.740 To maybe get himself

00:43:33.760 Into a better zone

00:43:34.620 You think

00:43:35.060 What do you mean

00:43:35.940 By gray zone

00:43:36.600 Like if you're not liking him

00:43:37.920 You're just not sure

00:43:38.760 Maybe

00:43:39.060 You're kind of like

00:43:39.620 Well you're never not sure

00:43:40.740 When you meet somebody

00:43:41.760 I think the more

00:43:42.720 It's a conversation

00:43:43.880 A person can learn

00:43:45.160 A lot about you

00:43:45.960 Through your conversation

00:43:47.400 I mean

00:43:47.900 If you're listening good

00:43:50.160 Some women get

00:43:51.620 Swindered through conversations

00:43:52.980 Because they

00:43:53.680 Some men

00:43:54.780 Know how to say

00:43:55.260 All the right shit

00:43:56.140 Or when you hang up

00:43:57.180 That phone

00:43:57.560 You gotta take a step back

00:43:58.600 Like oh

00:43:58.880 What this motherfucker up to

00:44:00.080 Yeah

00:44:00.560 You know

00:44:01.060 And then

00:44:01.480 Times have changed so much

00:44:04.040 Now

00:44:04.400 Motherfucker give you their name

00:44:05.680 You can call a girlfriend

00:44:07.280 Like my friend

00:44:08.080 Quisha

00:44:08.420 Bitch put this

00:44:09.300 Motherfucker name

00:44:10.020 In this thing

00:44:11.000 And tell me more

00:44:11.840 About this person

00:44:12.660 It'll bring up

00:44:13.620 Everything about them

00:44:14.540 Yeah it's hard to hide now

00:44:16.080 Yeah it's hard to hide now

00:44:17.380 So I mean

00:44:18.240 You just can't

00:44:19.000 You can't be

00:44:19.660 Goo goo ga ga

00:44:20.760 Over somebody

00:44:21.520 The first

00:44:22.100 Sometime

00:44:23.340 The first fucking year

00:44:24.320 You just gotta

00:44:24.880 Keep talking

00:44:26.040 And see if it grows

00:44:27.920 Yeah

00:44:28.440 Do you think

00:44:30.700 Sometimes I feel like

00:44:31.560 Black people don't get that nervous

00:44:32.800 I always feel like

00:44:33.600 Black people don't get nervous

00:44:34.860 Do you feel like

00:44:35.420 Black people get nervous

00:44:36.260 Or not

00:44:36.760 We human

00:44:37.900 What the fuck

00:44:39.000 You think we animals

00:44:39.920 No I don't think that at all

00:44:41.460 Black people don't get nervous

00:44:42.740 What the fuck

00:44:43.240 Are you talking about

00:44:44.220 A lot of my black friends

00:44:45.500 They never seem like

00:44:46.260 They get nervous

00:44:47.320 Nervous about what

00:44:48.460 You don't get nervous

00:44:49.280 Anything

00:44:49.680 I get nervous

00:44:50.280 I get nervous a lot

00:44:51.380 Do you

00:44:52.000 So I'm also a person

00:44:52.940 That gets extra nervous

00:44:53.960 So then

00:44:54.440 I think I'm more prone

00:44:55.680 To maybe thinking

00:44:56.860 That some people

00:44:57.400 Don't get nervous

00:44:58.340 You probably think

00:45:00.540 I would

00:45:02.440 I think

00:45:02.820 I think

00:45:03.260 It's not the word

00:45:04.240 Nervous

00:45:04.860 You probably think

00:45:05.540 We

00:45:05.800 Is he thinking

00:45:07.580 We badass

00:45:08.120 Are we just

00:45:09.420 Like

00:45:09.800 We don't give a fuck

00:45:11.320 I don't know

00:45:12.420 What it is

00:45:12.920 Maybe

00:45:13.140 We don't get scared

00:45:14.320 Maybe it's a mix

00:45:15.460 Of some of those things

00:45:16.340 And so then

00:45:16.880 It comes off to me

00:45:17.720 Like that

00:45:18.160 Oh my black friends

00:45:18.960 Don't get nervous

00:45:19.780 We get nervous

00:45:21.100 Let us get pulled over

00:45:22.780 By the police

00:45:23.380 Yeah they're right

00:45:25.340 We get nervous

00:45:26.180 Yeah I guess

00:45:27.140 That's a good point

00:45:27.900 I mean

00:45:28.940 That's a real game

00:45:29.900 Yeah once that shit happens

00:45:31.140 Man that shit is

00:45:32.220 But you know

00:45:33.060 No whammies

00:45:34.740 No what

00:45:35.940 No whammies

00:45:36.920 I was saying

00:45:37.280 It's like a game show

00:45:38.100 That shit is a dangerous game show

00:45:39.560 If you get pulled over

00:45:40.120 By the cops

00:45:40.700 But not for all cops

00:45:42.000 Because I'm not the one

00:45:42.940 That say all cops

00:45:43.940 Are bad cops

00:45:44.740 You know

00:45:45.200 I try to tell people

00:45:46.340 All the time

00:45:46.640 You can't throw

00:45:47.460 That one

00:45:48.600 Let that one person

00:45:49.880 Throw that whole race

00:45:50.940 Of people off

00:45:51.740 I know

00:45:52.080 That's not fair

00:45:52.940 Yeah cause there's

00:45:53.780 A lot of good guys

00:45:54.440 And then people come at them

00:45:55.660 With a bad energy

00:45:56.520 And shit

00:45:56.900 It's like when

00:45:57.280 The guy from

00:45:58.460 He might be your friend

00:45:59.680 But from

00:46:01.180 Who was on XM Radio

00:46:03.480 What's his name?

00:46:04.900 Oh

00:46:05.200 He was on XM Radio

00:46:09.560 They was on for years

00:46:10.540 And Patrice

00:46:11.000 Opie and Anthony

00:46:11.840 Yeah wasn't it

00:46:12.780 Opie or Anthony

00:46:14.220 That cussed out the black woman

00:46:15.580 I'm not sure which one

00:46:16.580 Remember she made the video

00:46:17.380 One of them made the video

00:46:18.440 It might be Anthony

00:46:19.680 Anthony's more like volatile

00:46:21.800 Yeah so he made the video

00:46:23.520 Saying black women

00:46:25.400 Or something

00:46:25.940 And all he had to say

00:46:27.460 Was that bitch

00:46:28.920 He had that incident

00:46:29.820 With

00:46:30.340 Was the problem

00:46:31.820 But when you

00:46:32.320 Throw a whole

00:46:33.380 When you throw all black women

00:46:35.140 In it

00:46:35.380 Then it becomes a problem

00:46:36.260 Because I'm not that lady

00:46:37.260 Who cussed you out

00:46:38.120 Right

00:46:38.520 So why are you

00:46:39.700 Throwing my race

00:46:40.860 Because you dealt

00:46:41.920 With somebody

00:46:42.460 That we are the same race

00:46:44.100 That's not fair

00:46:44.860 If a white boy

00:46:46.700 Run up and

00:46:47.640 Rape me

00:46:49.240 I'm not gonna say

00:46:50.020 All white boys rape

00:46:51.100 Yeah

00:46:51.620 That's not fair

00:46:52.400 I mean cause

00:46:53.020 You wouldn't rape me

00:46:53.980 Would you

00:46:54.360 I wouldn't

00:46:55.860 Why you say um first

00:46:57.220 That ain't how you

00:46:59.500 Ask a rape question

00:47:00.580 I mean I wanted to

00:47:01.320 Really

00:47:01.500 You know

00:47:02.340 You had to think twice

00:47:03.560 No ma'am

00:47:04.420 I would not be raping

00:47:05.540 I ain't doing no raping

00:47:06.600 Okay so

00:47:07.280 I'm not even that good at sex

00:47:08.260 I'd be the worst rapist ever

00:47:09.540 I'd be the absolute worst

00:47:10.320 Well most of them

00:47:11.060 All worse at sex

00:47:12.180 That's why they take it

00:47:13.300 And they force their shit on you

00:47:15.260 But

00:47:15.480 So I just think

00:47:16.660 I just think you cannot

00:47:18.000 Throw stuff on people

00:47:19.840 Because one person

00:47:21.280 Individuals did it

00:47:22.680 Yeah

00:47:23.000 It doesn't make

00:47:23.620 Everybody that race

00:47:25.080 The same way

00:47:25.880 How long were you doing comedy

00:47:28.180 Before you

00:47:28.620 Before something started to turn

00:47:30.420 And you're like

00:47:30.820 Oh wow this is gonna be good

00:47:32.200 Cause I've seen you go through

00:47:33.040 The clubs for a long time

00:47:34.260 Oh yeah

00:47:35.160 Um

00:47:35.800 Probably

00:47:37.000 12

00:47:37.900 13

00:47:38.340 Maybe 15 at the most

00:47:39.980 And what was the thing

00:47:41.980 That started to kind of

00:47:42.920 When did you start to see

00:47:43.940 Oh something's changing here

00:47:45.300 I

00:47:46.180 Um

00:47:47.080 I moved to Indiana

00:47:48.380 Which I thought my life

00:47:49.620 Was gonna be fucking over

00:47:50.740 And so um

00:47:52.380 I ended up

00:47:53.920 Getting on a tour

00:47:54.820 With Cat Williams

00:47:55.680 The Cat Apocalypse tour

00:47:57.020 Oh wow

00:47:57.800 And um

00:47:58.580 Right after I moved there

00:48:00.640 And Cat paid me

00:48:01.900 Fucking like

00:48:02.660 A shit ton of money

00:48:04.520 To do 15 minutes a night

00:48:06.000 And

00:48:07.120 Then I ended up

00:48:08.140 Going on a road

00:48:08.900 With Ernest J

00:48:09.780 And D. Ray Davis

00:48:10.860 And I just kept grinding

00:48:12.520 But I knew

00:48:13.440 I knew

00:48:14.220 By me being on that

00:48:15.520 Cat tour

00:48:16.360 And you know

00:48:17.420 I did festivals

00:48:18.240 And shit like that

00:48:19.240 That had really

00:48:20.780 Helped me out

00:48:21.580 Because Ray Grant

00:48:22.460 Was he on there too

00:48:23.200 Or no

00:48:23.540 Ray Grant was on

00:48:24.360 The one I was on

00:48:25.000 He's on all of them

00:48:25.840 But he was on

00:48:26.640 That one I was on

00:48:27.480 But I just felt like

00:48:28.900 That's when I thought

00:48:29.840 You know

00:48:30.640 A lot of shit

00:48:31.140 Started to kind of

00:48:32.040 Change for me

00:48:32.760 Yeah

00:48:33.140 And along with festivals

00:48:35.080 I stayed going to the festival

00:48:36.540 Even if I wasn't invited

00:48:37.960 Like Montreal

00:48:39.380 Because you know

00:48:39.940 As a young comic

00:48:40.940 You automatically think

00:48:42.040 Oh if I go to Montreal

00:48:42.980 If I just get new faces

00:48:43.940 My whole life

00:48:44.620 It's going to change

00:48:45.100 That is bullshit

00:48:46.680 I try to tell you

00:48:47.920 I said hey

00:48:48.500 Just go over there

00:48:49.080 And do the fucking jokes

00:48:49.980 It's a god damn

00:48:51.260 It's a good time

00:48:52.340 Yeah

00:48:52.780 It's a good time

00:48:54.020 I remember the year I went

00:48:55.620 And it was the year

00:48:56.840 Of the white boys

00:48:57.540 So white boys

00:48:58.220 Was really hot

00:48:59.180 But I didn't realize that

00:49:00.200 Until after I was there

00:49:01.200 And it was after

00:49:02.240 Everybody was all up

00:49:04.120 This Canadian

00:49:04.940 Comedian ass

00:49:06.480 Which I didn't think

00:49:07.460 Was funny

00:49:07.980 But I didn't know

00:49:08.780 I'm a young comic

00:49:09.940 So I don't know

00:49:10.540 What the industry

00:49:11.100 Is looking for

00:49:11.880 And I did my set

00:49:14.000 And nobody said

00:49:14.860 Anything to me

00:49:15.620 But when they tell you

00:49:16.920 Oh my god

00:49:17.820 The industry is going

00:49:18.540 To be all over you

00:49:19.240 You're going to do this

00:49:19.920 You're going to do that

00:49:20.520 Nobody talked to me

00:49:21.560 And I remember

00:49:21.900 Going back to my hotel

00:49:22.840 Room and crying

00:49:23.980 Because everybody

00:49:25.320 Told me if I go over there

00:49:26.300 I was going to blow

00:49:26.780 The fuck up

00:49:27.320 Then I had to realize

00:49:28.560 This shit is a process

00:49:30.660 And it might take

00:49:32.580 It might not never happen

00:49:33.900 Yeah

00:49:34.480 So I just started

00:49:35.580 To focus on my comedy

00:49:36.860 And when I got invited

00:49:38.320 To shit

00:49:38.680 I would show up

00:49:39.540 And I just learned

00:49:40.860 To take the feelings

00:49:41.860 Out of it

00:49:42.560 Because when you got

00:49:44.620 Feelings out in it

00:49:45.700 You will fucking

00:49:46.840 Go crazy

00:49:47.600 That's a really good point

00:49:49.660 Yeah I remember

00:49:50.600 Getting invited

00:49:51.180 Not getting invited

00:49:52.140 To those things

00:49:52.780 And thinking man

00:49:53.400 I'm never going

00:49:53.940 To have a chance

00:49:54.600 This industry

00:49:55.780 Doesn't like me

00:49:56.540 This whole world

00:49:57.300 Doesn't you know

00:49:58.540 That I'm not a part of it

00:50:01.680 Was you a new face?

00:50:02.880 No

00:50:03.140 Really?

00:50:04.520 I never was

00:50:05.240 Yeah

00:50:05.440 And then it started

00:50:06.820 To get you know

00:50:07.460 Now it's really

00:50:08.080 It's about like

00:50:08.940 Diversity

00:50:09.500 And a lot of like

00:50:10.280 Trans comedian

00:50:11.160 Gay

00:50:11.540 You know

00:50:11.880 It's a lot

00:50:12.340 Of that now

00:50:13.020 And I don't need it

00:50:13.960 Now I'm in my own

00:50:15.560 Kind of world now

00:50:16.500 Once podcasting started

00:50:17.520 People could create

00:50:18.240 Their own worlds

00:50:19.020 Yeah they could

00:50:19.740 They really could

00:50:20.580 I just think

00:50:23.520 It's more about

00:50:24.240 Diversity

00:50:25.080 It's a lot

00:50:25.940 About diversity

00:50:26.700 I think

00:50:27.320 The industry

00:50:29.220 Was forced to listen

00:50:30.320 To what everybody

00:50:31.140 Had to say

00:50:31.900 Yeah well you need

00:50:32.760 More voices

00:50:33.320 At a certain point

00:50:33.880 You kind of

00:50:34.420 Have heard a lot

00:50:35.200 Of the same voice

00:50:35.820 Yeah because I mean

00:50:36.680 Let's be honest

00:50:37.440 If it's a white girl

00:50:38.300 It's the same

00:50:39.120 Slutty white girl

00:50:40.040 Thing

00:50:40.480 And then I've seen

00:50:41.960 So many other

00:50:42.880 White female comedian

00:50:44.600 That wasn't slutty

00:50:46.020 But wasn't getting

00:50:47.020 Pushed to the top

00:50:48.200 Right

00:50:48.940 And I'm like

00:50:49.740 Well this bitch

00:50:50.480 Is funny

00:50:51.300 Right

00:50:51.800 But they doesn't get

00:50:52.920 You know

00:50:53.340 When you slutty

00:50:54.720 It was like

00:50:55.220 They'll push you

00:50:56.400 To the top

00:50:57.120 And everybody knows

00:50:58.360 That knew that

00:50:59.020 At the time

00:50:59.700 So I just think

00:51:01.420 It's

00:51:02.200 Would the industry

00:51:03.100 Believe that

00:51:03.740 The voice

00:51:04.760 That they're looking

00:51:05.300 For that season

00:51:06.560 Well I've always

00:51:08.780 Thought Earthquake

00:51:09.340 I've always thought

00:51:09.840 Is one of the best

00:51:10.580 Comedians

00:51:11.040 Oh he's so fucking funny

00:51:12.800 I mean who kills

00:51:14.180 A room

00:51:14.620 Who kills a room

00:51:15.840 I've always said

00:51:16.920 Earthquake is probably

00:51:17.680 One of the top three

00:51:18.620 That I've seen

00:51:19.280 Who kills a room

00:51:20.420 And to finally

00:51:21.660 See him getting

00:51:22.540 You know

00:51:22.980 Getting a Netflix

00:51:23.980 Special and just

00:51:25.000 You have one

00:51:26.200 Things that make

00:51:26.920 Him feel deserved

00:51:27.960 You know

00:51:28.240 Because a part of it

00:51:29.020 Is making him

00:51:29.680 Feel does

00:51:30.400 Like

00:51:30.760 You deserve

00:51:32.600 You know

00:51:33.020 Not you

00:51:33.440 But just like

00:51:34.600 A thing where

00:51:35.080 It's like

00:51:35.440 You've earned this

00:51:36.820 Yes

00:51:37.280 You know

00:51:37.620 A piece of him

00:51:38.900 Can be like

00:51:39.320 Okay I have

00:51:40.100 You know

00:51:40.500 I mean cause

00:51:41.000 We as comics

00:51:41.960 Let's be real

00:51:42.520 We sit at the house

00:51:43.220 And we're like

00:51:43.680 How this motherfucker

00:51:45.040 Get this

00:51:45.720 This motherfucker

00:51:46.780 Ain't even funny

00:51:47.440 You say it behind the door

00:51:48.520 Who the fuck

00:51:49.340 Pushing this person

00:51:50.240 So that's what I mean

00:51:51.540 When I say

00:51:51.940 I learned to take

00:51:52.800 The feelings out of it

00:51:53.940 So now I say

00:51:54.960 Oh well

00:51:55.520 You know

00:51:56.020 Maybe more

00:51:57.960 Black girls

00:51:58.660 Will get specials

00:51:59.560 I was so happy

00:52:00.740 When they gave

00:52:01.400 Tiffany that special

00:52:02.780 And Monique made

00:52:04.960 All of that noise

00:52:05.720 About you know

00:52:06.940 The pay of women

00:52:08.060 And stuff

00:52:08.440 And you know

00:52:10.000 I was happy

00:52:11.240 Because

00:52:11.880 I'm gonna be honest

00:52:13.920 I think

00:52:14.460 Netflix started

00:52:16.660 To give more

00:52:17.360 Black women stuff

00:52:18.480 After that

00:52:19.960 Right

00:52:20.380 You know

00:52:20.940 Where

00:52:21.960 I didn't see

00:52:22.640 A lot of black

00:52:23.660 Females

00:52:24.320 Getting special

00:52:25.540 Especially ones

00:52:26.640 That stepped

00:52:27.080 Outside of the box

00:52:28.220 So

00:52:29.000 That's a good point

00:52:30.360 Huh

00:52:30.640 Yeah

00:52:30.960 I never even thought

00:52:31.600 About that

00:52:32.080 Yeah

00:52:32.400 And then you know

00:52:33.280 I don't know

00:52:33.860 What Tiffany got paid

00:52:34.900 But I heard

00:52:35.260 She got paid

00:52:35.760 Really good

00:52:36.320 I mean

00:52:36.880 They was really good

00:52:37.720 To me too

00:52:38.420 So you know

00:52:39.900 I just think

00:52:40.600 It made them

00:52:41.240 Pay attention

00:52:42.080 Hey you

00:52:42.660 It's not enough

00:52:43.760 Diversity on your platform

00:52:44.960 Which they

00:52:45.460 They turned it around

00:52:46.560 And they put a lot

00:52:47.440 Of diversity on it

00:52:48.500 You know

00:52:49.020 I like when I see

00:52:49.960 A gay or trans

00:52:51.060 Or black or white

00:52:52.160 Or hispanic

00:52:53.340 Or any

00:52:54.880 Asian comedian

00:52:56.220 Yeah

00:52:56.540 Because that means

00:52:57.320 It's a little bit

00:52:58.000 It's something out there

00:52:59.000 For everybody

00:52:59.400 It's like a gumbo

00:53:00.420 Yeah

00:53:00.940 Instead of just

00:53:01.760 One straight way

00:53:02.680 Yeah

00:53:03.540 You know

00:53:05.000 I used to think

00:53:05.520 About that

00:53:05.840 When I was young

00:53:06.480 It would be like

00:53:07.000 Actually a lot

00:53:07.840 Of my favorite shows

00:53:08.720 It was like

00:53:09.400 I mean

00:53:10.540 What did they have

00:53:11.260 Like

00:53:11.560 I mean

00:53:12.400 I loved

00:53:13.000 A lot of my

00:53:15.200 Favorite sitcoms

00:53:15.980 And stuff

00:53:16.180 Were black shows

00:53:17.120 You know

00:53:17.640 Good Times

00:53:18.640 The Jeffersons

00:53:19.880 Yeah

00:53:20.340 What was

00:53:20.720 Family Matters

00:53:22.960 People love that show

00:53:24.160 Yeah

00:53:24.520 People love that show

00:53:25.520 My show is

00:53:26.160 The show that I do

00:53:28.240 The Miss Pat show

00:53:29.100 It's kind of like

00:53:30.500 They want to say

00:53:31.440 A Roseanne

00:53:32.120 Because I'm

00:53:32.860 I'm a plus sized

00:53:34.300 Woman like Roseanne

00:53:35.180 But

00:53:35.940 I think it's more

00:53:37.700 Like Archie Bonker

00:53:38.920 Like

00:53:40.260 Yeah yeah

00:53:41.100 That type of honesty

00:53:42.320 And

00:53:43.660 All in the family

00:53:44.660 That one

00:53:45.060 Yeah all in the family

00:53:46.440 I have a lot of

00:53:47.160 Learning moments

00:53:47.920 Like him

00:53:48.480 Yeah

00:53:49.000 So

00:53:49.700 But

00:53:51.140 Sometimes

00:53:52.140 Sometimes I'm shooting

00:53:53.240 I tell my son

00:53:54.060 I tell my

00:53:54.660 Co-creator

00:53:55.660 Jordan Cooper

00:53:56.240 I say sometimes

00:53:56.800 It feel like it's Martin

00:53:58.060 Then it feel like a

00:53:59.160 Burning Max

00:53:59.680 So it's a little bit

00:54:00.500 A mix of everything

00:54:01.700 Well you look like

00:54:02.640 Gina from Martin

00:54:03.360 A little bit

00:54:03.840 The lady that played

00:54:04.640 In that show

00:54:05.280 Really?

00:54:06.160 I've never heard that one

00:54:07.280 Really?

00:54:08.060 Mike

00:54:08.420 The father on the show

00:54:10.140 Wife looks a lot

00:54:11.320 Like her to me

00:54:12.180 Oh really?

00:54:12.900 Yeah

00:54:13.240 Yeah

00:54:13.700 We have a couple

00:54:15.440 Questions that came in

00:54:16.200 Do you want to pull

00:54:16.640 Something up

00:54:17.120 Colin?

00:54:17.300 Okay

00:54:17.600 Hey what's up Miss Pat

00:54:19.620 What's up Theo?

00:54:21.320 My question is

00:54:22.320 For Miss Pat

00:54:23.060 I was a photographer

00:54:24.600 At Skank Fest

00:54:25.520 Last November

00:54:26.680 And Miss Pat was there

00:54:27.720 And so was

00:54:28.400 So was the great

00:54:29.400 Bob Saget

00:54:30.100 And you know

00:54:31.380 Miss Pat and Bob

00:54:32.380 Talked a lot about

00:54:33.380 Their friendship

00:54:34.000 And their relationship

00:54:35.560 You know on podcast

00:54:36.560 During the week

00:54:37.260 And stuff

00:54:37.700 But I was just wondering

00:54:39.040 Is there a favorite

00:54:39.680 Moment you have

00:54:40.980 Miss Pat

00:54:41.520 You know

00:54:42.340 Or a favorite

00:54:43.040 Story about Bob

00:54:45.040 That you have

00:54:45.540 We'd love to hear it

00:54:46.380 Thanks guys

00:54:47.060 Gang gang

00:54:47.540 Gang baby

00:54:48.140 Thanks for the question

00:54:48.880 Man

00:54:49.220 Yeah

00:54:51.580 Bob Saget

00:54:52.600 Came to my house

00:54:53.380 For dinner

00:54:53.900 Did he really?

00:54:55.040 I did Bob Saget

00:54:56.360 Podcast

00:54:57.740 And when we

00:54:59.700 Locked off

00:55:00.540 And you know

00:55:01.140 I found out

00:55:01.740 I said you playing

00:55:02.420 In Indy

00:55:02.860 I live here

00:55:03.380 He's like

00:55:03.720 Why don't I come

00:55:04.660 To your house

00:55:05.060 For dinner

00:55:05.440 And I'm like

00:55:05.840 What the fuck

00:55:06.800 You know

00:55:07.420 I'm like

00:55:07.680 You wanna come

00:55:08.340 To my motherfucking

00:55:08.840 House for dinner

00:55:09.480 And so he really

00:55:10.840 Threw me off

00:55:11.520 And I'm like

00:55:12.020 Okay

00:55:12.840 And so I didn't

00:55:14.260 Really know

00:55:14.700 If he was gonna come

00:55:15.840 Wow

00:55:16.260 And at the time

00:55:17.020 I'm in Atlanta

00:55:17.660 Trying to buy a house

00:55:18.580 And get our stuff together

00:55:19.440 I had a gig

00:55:20.640 And I had to get rid

00:55:21.660 Of that date

00:55:22.540 That Bob Saget

00:55:23.260 That Thursday

00:55:23.880 Because I was not

00:55:24.860 Gonna tell Bob Saget

00:55:25.680 He could not come

00:55:26.260 To my fucking house

00:55:26.980 So I just

00:55:27.780 I went home

00:55:28.340 And I cleaned up

00:55:29.000 I called the housekeeper

00:55:29.800 And my husband's like

00:55:30.540 What the fuck is going on

00:55:31.360 I said I have a really

00:55:32.260 Famous person coming

00:55:33.160 To the house

00:55:33.580 But I can't tell y'all

00:55:34.540 Who it is

00:55:34.920 Cause I didn't know

00:55:35.540 If Bob Saget

00:55:36.060 Was gonna show the fuck up

00:55:36.940 Like he did

00:55:37.340 You know how famous

00:55:38.000 People stand you up

00:55:38.980 And then they was like

00:55:40.180 Well who's coming

00:55:40.980 And I would never

00:55:41.900 Tell them who came

00:55:42.820 And I just said

00:55:43.620 Wait till they ring the door

00:55:44.640 And everybody trying

00:55:45.280 To figure out

00:55:45.760 Fucking who coming

00:55:47.180 He rings the doorbell

00:55:48.860 He got flowers

00:55:49.780 In his hand

00:55:50.400 And wine

00:55:50.960 They was like

00:55:51.920 Bob Saget

00:55:53.080 Oh my god

00:55:57.320 And we sat there

00:55:58.880 And I wish y'all

00:55:59.900 To video the whole thing

00:56:01.200 When I tell you

00:56:02.280 He was so fucking funny

00:56:04.140 And you know

00:56:05.160 You thinking Bob Saget

00:56:06.720 You know

00:56:07.080 The clean Bob Saget

00:56:08.140 From the sitcom

00:56:08.740 Corny as fuck

00:56:10.200 You know

00:56:10.640 But I've seen his stand up

00:56:12.420 I knew his stand up

00:56:13.200 Was funny

00:56:13.700 I just didn't

00:56:14.700 He was so fucking

00:56:16.300 Quick with it

00:56:17.140 He was like

00:56:18.160 Just cracking the fuck

00:56:19.500 He had us cracking up

00:56:20.640 Like seriously

00:56:21.440 And then

00:56:22.340 My son barbecued

00:56:23.880 Cause my son

00:56:24.420 Junebug can barbecue

00:56:25.240 Really well

00:56:25.800 So I'm like

00:56:26.180 Junebug

00:56:26.420 You gonna barbecue

00:56:27.080 And Gary Allen's

00:56:28.040 Gonna make

00:56:28.340 They was like

00:56:28.640 Who the fuck

00:56:29.040 Shut the fuck up

00:56:29.920 I said

00:56:30.160 Just cook the food

00:56:30.940 And I can't cook

00:56:32.200 So we made this barbecue

00:56:34.060 And I bought steaks

00:56:35.220 And you know

00:56:36.180 I'm like

00:56:36.820 I don't know

00:56:37.180 What the fuck

00:56:37.600 You know

00:56:38.480 Rich people eat

00:56:39.360 You know

00:56:39.840 Or how they eat

00:56:40.620 So I just went out

00:56:41.500 And bought the best

00:56:42.100 Of everything

00:56:42.720 And Bob Saget

00:56:44.900 Ate a plate

00:56:45.400 He's like

00:56:45.680 Oh my god

00:56:46.120 This shit is so fucking good

00:56:47.300 He got up

00:56:48.560 And went and fixed

00:56:49.280 Itself another plate

00:56:50.400 Damn

00:56:50.820 And then he did

00:56:52.060 I was like

00:56:52.440 Hold on Bob

00:56:53.380 You're gonna have

00:56:53.680 To buy a grocery

00:56:54.280 Motherfucker

00:56:54.920 You know

00:56:55.600 I ate three plates

00:56:56.500 He's like

00:56:57.100 It's been a long time

00:56:58.140 Since I had food

00:56:58.900 This good

00:56:59.400 Where the fuck

00:57:00.480 Have you been

00:57:01.080 And he was there

00:57:02.340 For about four or five hours

00:57:03.760 And we laughed

00:57:04.760 At that table

00:57:05.660 And we talked

00:57:07.060 And that's my

00:57:08.500 That's my most memorable

00:57:09.560 Moment with him

00:57:10.440 Wow

00:57:10.780 That's wild

00:57:11.640 That's amazing

00:57:12.840 Huh

00:57:13.140 Yeah

00:57:13.540 And your family

00:57:14.220 Your kids were there too

00:57:15.200 My whole family was there

00:57:17.000 Wow

00:57:17.420 I flew

00:57:18.660 The girl who do my hair

00:57:20.980 And I was like

00:57:21.500 He might not come

00:57:22.320 Because I told her

00:57:23.000 Who he was

00:57:23.660 But I didn't tell my family

00:57:25.080 And we just waited

00:57:26.380 And he rung that door

00:57:27.320 But he got in an Uber

00:57:28.520 Damn

00:57:29.100 And got out the fucking Uber

00:57:30.300 Like a nice Uber

00:57:31.160 Or a regular one

00:57:31.820 It was a regular little Uber

00:57:33.380 I don't even think

00:57:34.120 The person who picked Bob Saget up

00:57:36.140 Knew they would Bob Saget

00:57:37.100 Because he had a mask on

00:57:38.120 Oh yeah

00:57:39.100 Yeah

00:57:39.900 Damn

00:57:40.920 And so we take some pictures

00:57:43.040 And I post them

00:57:43.860 And everybody's like

00:57:44.820 Bob Saget was in our neighborhood

00:57:46.900 Oh that's my most memorable moment

00:57:49.820 I tell you

00:57:50.500 When I found out he passed

00:57:52.760 I couldn't stop crying

00:57:54.240 Yeah

00:57:54.580 Because it was such

00:57:55.580 A building relationship

00:57:56.380 Like Bob Saget would literally

00:57:58.020 Text me in the middle of the night

00:57:59.600 How you doing

00:58:00.040 And I had just talked to him

00:58:02.000 Because you know

00:58:03.220 I had asked Bob

00:58:04.440 To be on my show

00:58:05.580 And my show was on BET Plus

00:58:07.480 And Paramount Plus

00:58:08.340 And you know

00:58:09.080 I know Bob ain't never been on BET

00:58:10.940 So I said

00:58:11.940 I'm gonna ask him

00:58:12.740 And I said

00:58:13.100 Would you come and play

00:58:14.200 You know

00:58:14.840 A role on the show

00:58:15.700 He's like

00:58:15.940 Fuck yeah I'm there

00:58:16.740 So we were literally

00:58:17.840 Talking about him

00:58:18.980 You know

00:58:19.720 Doing a role on the show

00:58:21.220 And the week he died

00:58:25.380 I had just texted him

00:58:26.760 And said he was setting it up

00:58:28.040 He's telling me

00:58:28.660 Who to reach out to

00:58:29.680 And I got you Pat

00:58:31.220 I'm gonna do it

00:58:31.880 And I was leaving

00:58:33.800 A Falcon game

00:58:34.820 And my son called

00:58:36.220 And said

00:58:36.600 They said Bob Saget died

00:58:38.000 And I called

00:58:39.040 And there was no answer

00:58:40.500 And I was like

00:58:41.140 This can't be real

00:58:42.240 And I literally

00:58:44.940 I literally fucking cried

00:58:46.880 I was like

00:58:47.580 Cause I really liked it

00:58:49.240 He was so fucking genuine

00:58:50.920 He was just a genuine guy

00:58:53.080 And I'm the type of person

00:58:54.500 Like

00:58:54.800 I don't give a fuck

00:58:55.800 Who you are

00:58:56.320 Or what you done

00:58:57.060 If you a good person

00:58:58.840 Then I fuck with you

00:59:00.280 Yeah

00:59:00.520 And he was a good person

00:59:01.880 Wow

00:59:02.460 Man that's what

00:59:04.900 Kind of makes me sad

00:59:05.900 Yeah he was a good person

00:59:07.920 Damn

00:59:08.500 And sometimes I go back

00:59:09.560 And I look at

00:59:10.180 And you know

00:59:10.820 I started seeing people

00:59:11.780 Posting their text messages

00:59:13.000 Between

00:59:13.500 Them and Bob Saget

00:59:15.320 I was like

00:59:16.060 I would never do that

00:59:17.480 Some of that's a little weird

00:59:18.680 You know

00:59:19.200 I think showing some support

00:59:20.120 Is one thing

00:59:20.800 Trying to relate too much

00:59:22.320 I don't

00:59:22.560 When people do that shit

00:59:23.460 They over relate

00:59:24.420 That shit to me

00:59:25.360 Is so cringe

00:59:25.640 Well that's

00:59:25.980 As you want clout

00:59:26.780 Online too

00:59:28.060 When you want

00:59:28.480 I would never show

00:59:29.800 Something that private

00:59:30.940 Because you died

00:59:32.180 To go and show

00:59:34.000 People my text message

00:59:35.380 Between me and Bob Saget

00:59:36.580 I just

00:59:37.180 I wouldn't do that

00:59:38.100 You know

00:59:38.640 And then

00:59:39.560 Like I had an actress

00:59:40.940 On the show

00:59:41.560 That committed suicide

00:59:42.760 Who played the secretary

00:59:43.980 Oh

00:59:44.540 And I had just talked to her

00:59:46.260 A week before

00:59:47.200 And she was about to

00:59:48.040 Return to the show

00:59:49.100 And that shit

00:59:50.980 Just hit me like a brick

00:59:52.040 Because she was

00:59:53.180 She was like my baby

00:59:54.620 You know

00:59:54.940 I don't know

00:59:55.600 I

00:59:56.080 When I meet people

00:59:57.380 It's

00:59:58.340 Because I grew up like

00:59:59.460 Not

01:00:00.340 Not

01:00:00.660 Not a close knit family

01:00:02.240 And I just started

01:00:04.240 To collect people

01:00:05.080 As family members

01:00:06.140 And she was like

01:00:07.520 A family member

01:00:08.400 To me

01:00:09.320 And you know

01:00:11.140 About three weeks ago

01:00:13.240 She was here

01:00:13.780 She was missing

01:00:14.440 And then she

01:00:15.160 They found her

01:00:17.200 They said she committed suicide

01:00:19.100 So

01:00:19.580 Did you have any inkling

01:00:20.940 When you saw her

01:00:21.500 Did she seem down

01:00:22.320 Or you couldn't

01:00:22.620 You'd have no idea

01:00:23.320 I don't

01:00:24.520 You know

01:00:24.860 You don't really

01:00:25.740 She was

01:00:26.760 I had a nervous energy

01:00:27.880 To me

01:00:28.260 Like

01:00:28.500 Like always something wrong

01:00:30.320 Because she didn't want

01:00:30.940 To disappoint people

01:00:31.860 And I was talking to her

01:00:32.820 About her role

01:00:33.460 And I was like

01:00:33.820 That role is too small

01:00:34.620 You're too fucking good

01:00:35.400 So look

01:00:35.980 I'm going to bring you

01:00:36.540 In for this role

01:00:37.180 And we back and forth

01:00:38.420 And I come off stage

01:00:39.340 And I got this long ass section

01:00:40.480 I said you

01:00:40.880 I called

01:00:41.300 I said you okay

01:00:41.960 And he's like

01:00:42.580 I just don't want

01:00:43.060 To disappoint you

01:00:43.660 And I was like

01:00:44.120 Lindsay I fucking love you

01:00:45.720 And you know

01:00:46.380 No no you know

01:00:47.360 And I was like

01:00:48.060 Just wait

01:00:48.580 And the week she killed herself

01:00:49.740 Was the week she was

01:00:50.400 Supposed to be on my fucking show

01:00:51.580 Well she was

01:00:52.320 That was the episode

01:00:53.000 She was going to come in for

01:00:53.960 But I told her it was too small

01:00:55.240 I was going to bring her in

01:00:56.300 For the next one

01:00:56.840 So we literally

01:00:57.520 Writing her in the next one

01:00:59.000 And as I come off stage

01:01:01.300 They said she was missing

01:01:02.700 And I talked to another

01:01:05.400 One of the actors

01:01:06.820 From LA on my show

01:01:08.200 And then they

01:01:09.420 What two days later

01:01:10.740 They said she was dead

01:01:11.880 And I was like

01:01:12.820 I can't believe she did this

01:01:14.240 Damn

01:01:14.880 That's scary

01:01:17.200 Yeah it's very scary

01:01:18.680 You know

01:01:19.340 Because I mean

01:01:19.960 Because

01:01:20.900 Sometimes I beat myself

01:01:23.140 I was like

01:01:23.520 Fuck if I had just

01:01:24.660 Given her that small role

01:01:25.900 She could have been there

01:01:27.580 With me

01:01:27.920 And she wouldn't have

01:01:28.460 Killed herself

01:01:29.120 Yeah I have a

01:01:30.460 There's a guy

01:01:31.160 Like who used to hit me up

01:01:32.600 I met him through skydiving

01:01:34.460 Right

01:01:34.740 I met him at a comedy show

01:01:35.880 One time

01:01:36.360 And he said

01:01:37.200 Hey man I'm such a big fan

01:01:38.180 I can relate to you

01:01:38.920 On certain levels

01:01:39.760 Like how you feel

01:01:41.180 About a lot of things

01:01:41.980 And we swapped numbers

01:01:43.440 He invited me to go skydiving

01:01:44.580 So I went down there

01:01:45.360 One time

01:01:45.800 Took my little

01:01:46.280 I had a girlfriend

01:01:46.880 At the time

01:01:47.600 And she was a good girl

01:01:49.180 And we went skydiving

01:01:50.880 And then a couple

01:01:51.800 Like months after that

01:01:52.960 He'd been messaging me

01:01:53.720 But I just hadn't noticed

01:01:55.080 I'd just been busy

01:01:56.420 And I just hadn't noticed

01:01:57.380 And he'd sent like

01:01:58.160 Three texts over a couple months

01:01:59.560 And then he killed himself

01:02:00.520 And sometimes I think

01:02:01.960 Damn man

01:02:02.620 If I just had

01:02:03.260 My life had been

01:02:04.360 A little slower

01:02:05.140 Or something

01:02:06.380 You know

01:02:06.600 If I hadn't been

01:02:07.020 Thinking about myself

01:02:07.940 Then I'm not saying

01:02:09.700 I could have saved him

01:02:10.460 But maybe I could have

01:02:11.440 Just

01:02:11.640 You just don't know

01:02:12.780 Sometimes how

01:02:13.540 What people are needing

01:02:15.440 You know

01:02:15.980 I mean some people

01:02:16.760 Some people just need

01:02:17.940 Somebody to listen sometimes

01:02:19.260 And so

01:02:20.080 I have a

01:02:20.980 And I don't have a lot

01:02:22.880 A lot of time

01:02:23.500 Like I used to

01:02:24.320 Because I'm so busy

01:02:25.220 With the TV show

01:02:25.900 Radio

01:02:26.240 And just trying to

01:02:27.460 Create other shit

01:02:28.320 Where I try to

01:02:29.820 Take out the time

01:02:30.560 Like if I'm waking up

01:02:31.580 At four o'clock

01:02:32.260 In the morning

01:02:32.660 I don't really have to be up

01:02:33.780 Because my mind

01:02:34.360 Waked me up at that time

01:02:35.440 I stroll through my messages

01:02:37.160 And I see a lot of people

01:02:39.080 That need talking

01:02:41.500 And if I can't say a lot

01:02:42.840 I was like

01:02:43.380 Love you

01:02:43.860 Take care

01:02:44.640 How you doing

01:02:45.500 And I answer back

01:02:46.900 Right

01:02:47.180 I try to as much as I can

01:02:48.520 With a growing career

01:02:50.220 I mean I hope I get as big as

01:02:52.740 Dave Chappelle and Kevin Hart

01:02:54.560 One day

01:02:55.080 But I do take time

01:02:56.800 To when they message me

01:02:58.420 When I can

01:03:00.420 To say something back

01:03:01.780 Yeah

01:03:02.060 Because sometimes

01:03:02.600 People just need an ear

01:03:03.780 Yeah

01:03:05.220 Yeah it's crazy

01:03:06.720 How we have so much

01:03:07.340 Communication now

01:03:08.220 But nobody really

01:03:09.480 Taking time

01:03:10.120 Really to listen

01:03:10.800 Nobody's really available

01:03:12.380 In a lot of ways

01:03:13.400 Or we all feel like

01:03:14.600 We also need to

01:03:15.580 Tell somebody

01:03:17.320 Instead of hear them

01:03:18.580 You know

01:03:19.140 I notice that a lot

01:03:20.200 We feel this compulsion

01:03:21.700 I think since we have

01:03:22.480 So many ways

01:03:23.020 To put things out there

01:03:24.200 That we have to

01:03:25.280 Put things out

01:03:25.960 I have to

01:03:26.740 I have to tell them

01:03:28.060 You know

01:03:28.280 I have to

01:03:28.840 Instead of like

01:03:30.400 Listen

01:03:31.500 I don't know

01:03:32.480 I don't know that much

01:03:34.080 Yeah

01:03:36.460 Is there another question?

01:03:40.060 Yeah we got one more

01:03:40.800 Question that came in

01:03:41.540 Oh

01:03:42.000 I'm gonna start this question

01:03:43.940 Shit

01:03:44.160 I did somebody else

01:03:44.820 Podcast

01:03:45.140 It was kind of cute

01:03:46.060 Yeah it's nice

01:03:47.360 And people can

01:03:47.940 You know

01:03:48.340 If they get specific

01:03:49.240 They can really have

01:03:49.960 Something for you

01:03:50.760 Got a question here

01:03:53.460 From Miss Pat

01:03:54.140 If you had

01:03:55.820 Three options

01:03:57.040 To marry

01:03:57.680 One of these comedians

01:03:59.280 And live with

01:04:00.300 For the rest of

01:04:01.020 Your entire life

01:04:01.960 Between your boy

01:04:03.580 Theo Vaughn

01:04:04.900 Everyone's favorite

01:04:06.540 Fat alcoholic comedian

01:04:07.860 Burt Kreischer

01:04:08.800 Or the slept king himself

01:04:11.940 Bobby Lee

01:04:13.320 Who are you

01:04:14.740 Taking this Pat?

01:04:16.220 Yeah Bobby Lee

01:04:16.880 Could you handle

01:04:17.300 That little

01:04:17.620 Vietnamese treat

01:04:18.620 That little egg roll

01:04:19.820 Could you handle

01:04:20.880 That little shrimp salad

01:04:22.060 Baby

01:04:22.320 Could you handle it?

01:04:22.880 Oh my god

01:04:23.480 Oh my god

01:04:24.620 Could you handle that

01:04:26.600 I'm gonna have to choose

01:04:29.220 You look good in that

01:04:30.880 Picture

01:04:31.100 If you think I look good

01:04:33.140 In that

01:04:33.500 Then something

01:04:34.280 You done changed

01:04:35.060 Because something

01:04:35.900 Wrong with you now

01:04:36.780 Well I'm gonna have to

01:04:37.320 Go with Burt Kreischer

01:04:38.120 Burt got that long

01:04:39.080 Paper

01:04:39.540 Oh yeah

01:04:40.440 That's a good point

01:04:41.280 Burt look like

01:04:41.820 He can buy more wigs

01:04:42.700 Than y'all can

01:04:43.420 And we look like

01:04:44.720 We're wearing wigs

01:04:45.540 That's the crazy part

01:04:46.620 But what about Bobby

01:04:48.560 You ever date

01:04:48.960 A little Asian man

01:04:49.820 I ain't never date

01:04:50.480 Outside my damn race

01:04:51.900 There's definitely

01:04:53.000 Not no fucking Asian

01:04:54.280 Come on

01:04:54.680 I've seen Bobby Lee

01:04:55.680 Dick too

01:04:56.080 That nobody want

01:04:56.740 That shit

01:04:57.200 That shit's so smart

01:04:58.120 Like a toothpick

01:04:58.980 Yeah that thing

01:04:59.820 Really don't even

01:05:00.480 Look like you can do

01:05:01.120 Nuts

01:05:01.320 He got baby nuts

01:05:03.280 So you know

01:05:04.340 He ain't busting

01:05:07.040 No nothing

01:05:07.580 He peeing inside of you

01:05:09.060 Yeah

01:05:10.400 It look like

01:05:11.880 His dick crying a little

01:05:13.100 No

01:05:13.480 You know

01:05:14.680 The Asian people

01:05:16.240 They say

01:05:16.740 Wear those little

01:05:17.500 Wooden shoes

01:05:18.120 To keep their feet

01:05:18.780 From growing

01:05:19.360 Look he stuck

01:05:20.300 His dick in one

01:05:21.160 It would have to be

01:05:24.740 Burt Kreischer

01:05:25.320 For me baby

01:05:26.080 Damn

01:05:27.100 Alright

01:05:27.200 I seen Burt House too

01:05:29.400 And Burt

01:05:30.040 Burt like them

01:05:30.720 Southern girls

01:05:31.380 Because his wife

01:05:32.000 From the same place

01:05:32.800 I'm from

01:05:33.180 Atlanta

01:05:33.620 Is she really

01:05:34.320 Yes

01:05:34.900 Yeah she's beautiful

01:05:35.880 She's a sweetheart

01:05:36.800 But you do look like

01:05:37.900 An actress

01:05:38.360 An actor in that picture

01:05:39.680 Theo

01:05:40.000 Oh thank you

01:05:40.920 Yeah

01:05:41.460 Yeah I think about

01:05:42.440 Sometimes doing some acting

01:05:43.480 But I don't know

01:05:44.500 Podcasting and touring

01:05:45.420 Kind of keeps me so busy

01:05:46.640 You know

01:05:47.020 Did you always want

01:05:47.820 To be an actress

01:05:48.420 No

01:05:48.720 I just

01:05:49.980 I love comedy

01:05:51.060 And um

01:05:52.160 Because acting's

01:05:52.840 A different thing

01:05:53.640 It's a different beast

01:05:54.840 Um

01:05:55.440 You know

01:05:56.040 My show was created

01:05:57.020 Through Fox

01:05:57.780 And Lee Daniel

01:05:59.380 And Ron Howard

01:06:00.280 And Brian Grazer

01:06:01.260 So um

01:06:02.820 They immediately

01:06:03.760 Got me an acting coach

01:06:05.380 And it took

01:06:06.540 Five years

01:06:07.180 To get

01:06:07.560 That show up

01:06:08.660 And on TV

01:06:09.720 Because Hulu

01:06:10.420 Shot the pilot

01:06:11.260 Dropped it

01:06:12.300 And then BET Plus

01:06:13.280 Picked it up

01:06:13.860 And then Paramount

01:06:14.740 It just went over

01:06:15.540 To Paramount

01:06:16.240 Plus

01:06:16.920 So um

01:06:18.260 They just

01:06:19.760 They put a lot of money

01:06:20.700 Into me

01:06:21.080 Learning how to act

01:06:22.000 So

01:06:23.000 But no

01:06:23.380 I prefer comedy first

01:06:25.180 Yeah

01:06:25.520 But I do

01:06:26.480 I do like creating

01:06:27.840 Yeah

01:06:28.520 I do

01:06:29.180 I have some other things

01:06:30.420 And

01:06:30.640 That I'm working on

01:06:31.940 I like behind the camera

01:06:33.720 Yeah

01:06:34.340 It's a lot of fucking work

01:06:36.020 In front of that camera

01:06:37.000 Yeah

01:06:37.880 Especially when it's your show

01:06:38.720 Because you gotta memorize lines

01:06:39.960 You gotta write jokes

01:06:40.760 You gotta help write it

01:06:41.700 Then you know

01:06:42.360 When all the other actors

01:06:43.500 Go home

01:06:43.900 Your ass still up

01:06:44.900 Yeah

01:06:45.540 And you

01:06:46.220 This is your show

01:06:47.200 So you gotta still

01:06:48.060 Make it great

01:06:48.600 Like I literally

01:06:49.260 Gotta leave here

01:06:50.080 And I'm running

01:06:51.600 To do another show

01:06:52.420 And then on the plane

01:06:53.080 I'm reading all night

01:06:54.060 Yeah

01:06:54.440 It's a lot of work

01:06:55.940 Yeah

01:06:56.400 It's more work

01:06:56.880 Than people think

01:06:57.520 Oh it's a lot of fucking work

01:06:59.160 You gonna earn them pennies

01:07:00.380 Yeah

01:07:01.140 I agree

01:07:02.300 Um

01:07:03.120 Let's get a different one

01:07:04.440 Do we have one more

01:07:05.040 That came in

01:07:05.680 And then we'll get you

01:07:07.120 Yo this past weekend

01:07:08.180 What's up

01:07:08.780 You know

01:07:09.600 I'm sitting here

01:07:10.080 All horned up

01:07:10.960 Anyways

01:07:12.880 Miss Pat

01:07:13.600 I got a question for you

01:07:14.800 So

01:07:15.480 You talk about

01:07:16.480 How you used to sell

01:07:17.160 Crack cocaine and stuff

01:07:18.280 Everybody knows

01:07:19.340 Every neighborhood

01:07:20.140 Has that one funny crack head

01:07:21.680 Who is the funniest person

01:07:23.900 That you used to sell crack to

01:07:25.300 Gang

01:07:26.620 You guys have a good one

01:07:27.700 Gang baby

01:07:28.200 I always wanted to smoke crack man

01:07:29.780 Oh no you don't

01:07:30.840 But I think

01:07:31.620 It was

01:07:31.920 I'm gonna say too

01:07:33.020 If I can remember

01:07:34.220 One of them's name was Rehab

01:07:36.440 Mmhmm

01:07:37.160 It was this dude

01:07:37.960 He say

01:07:38.360 My street name was Rabbit

01:07:40.200 Rabbit

01:07:40.560 Give me one more rock

01:07:42.080 I'm going to the rehab

01:07:43.100 So I named him Rehab

01:07:44.140 Because he never made it

01:07:45.040 He ended up fucking

01:07:46.140 Shooting some dope

01:07:47.360 And falling out in the street

01:07:48.420 And died

01:07:48.960 He was so fucking funny

01:07:51.080 And Squirrel was the other one

01:07:52.980 He the only motherfucker

01:07:54.340 That bought dope from you

01:07:55.640 But would rap

01:07:56.500 Give me that sack

01:07:57.800 Pat

01:07:58.280 Give me that sack

01:07:59.580 Rap

01:07:59.860 He would have a whole rap

01:08:01.220 Every time he came

01:08:02.120 And bought dope

01:08:02.740 He would sing you a whole song

01:08:04.720 That was fucking hilarious

01:08:06.280 Yeah

01:08:07.400 There's some funny ass crack

01:08:08.820 There's some talented ass crackheads

01:08:10.300 Out there too

01:08:10.920 Yeah

01:08:11.460 Yeah crack will bring the talent

01:08:12.760 Right out of you

01:08:13.360 And brings it right to the surface

01:08:14.440 Because you need it

01:08:15.280 So you'll give whatever you got

01:08:16.560 Whatever your talent is

01:08:17.600 I feel like it'll

01:08:18.260 You'll display it

01:08:20.060 Is that true you think?

01:08:21.540 No

01:08:21.780 No I think talent

01:08:22.540 Bring the best talent

01:08:24.060 I mean

01:08:24.360 The best talent crack

01:08:25.700 Bring out of you

01:08:26.480 Is dick sucking

01:08:27.420 Oh damn

01:08:28.200 Because when you run out of money

01:08:29.480 You gotta do something

01:08:30.420 Well I guess you right then Theo

01:08:31.880 Damn

01:08:32.480 Yeah I guess that's true huh

01:08:35.100 I would never

01:08:36.680 How far down a crack

01:08:38.300 Do you have to beat it

01:08:39.280 Will you get to that

01:08:40.060 Will you do an oral sex

01:08:41.300 Out there for another

01:08:42.280 Two dollars

01:08:43.320 Probably at the bottom

01:08:45.880 But how many times

01:08:47.420 Do you have to use crack

01:08:48.220 Before you start getting to that

01:08:49.180 Like is there a couple of times

01:08:50.220 I don't know

01:08:50.720 I never use

01:08:51.480 They say crack is very addictive

01:08:53.080 The very first time

01:08:54.060 They say it gives you a feeling

01:08:55.540 That you'll never get again

01:08:56.880 Wow

01:08:57.720 And you're forever searching

01:08:59.640 For that feeling

01:09:00.420 Damn

01:09:01.020 That's crazy

01:09:02.420 That they can make that huh

01:09:03.480 Uh yeah

01:09:05.320 That's crazy

01:09:07.220 It's like they're playing

01:09:07.940 Like they're playing God

01:09:10.340 Or something

01:09:10.640 Yeah this shit is wild out there

01:09:12.260 Yeah I always wanted to smoke it

01:09:13.780 But I've always been afraid

01:09:14.700 I guess

01:09:15.220 Well I'm glad you didn't

01:09:16.540 Because I would hate it

01:09:17.360 See you say your mullet

01:09:18.540 Yeah

01:09:18.960 Miss Pat

01:09:22.580 Thank you for coming in

01:09:23.640 Thank you for finally

01:09:24.960 Fucking having me

01:09:25.880 I know we've been

01:09:26.560 Back and forth

01:09:27.220 Back and forth

01:09:27.940 And I've been ripping and running

01:09:29.600 But I appreciate you

01:09:30.720 Taking out the time

01:09:32.020 And doing it today

01:09:32.880 Well I feel honored

01:09:34.200 And I'm so excited

01:09:35.020 For your success

01:09:35.700 I'm just really

01:09:36.400 You know

01:09:37.400 I'm just happy for you

01:09:38.400 You sound like you have

01:09:39.140 A beautiful voice

01:09:39.940 And I think we just need it

01:09:42.040 In the world

01:09:42.480 So thank you for coming

01:09:43.840 And spending some time with me

01:09:44.900 And if it don't work out

01:09:45.780 On the white side

01:09:46.480 Theo

01:09:46.760 Come on over here

01:09:47.540 With these

01:09:47.920 Beautiful

01:09:48.920 Cocoa Butter

01:09:50.200 Rev Dan sisters

01:09:51.280 They'll take you

01:09:52.280 Will they give me a chance

01:09:53.060 You think

01:09:53.420 They're going to change

01:09:54.320 That haircut

01:09:54.820 But they're going to put

01:09:57.420 Some cornrows in this shit

01:09:58.820 Dude roll it up

01:09:59.760 I'll put a jingle bell

01:10:00.680 In that shit

01:10:01.180 During the holidays baby

01:10:02.300 You know what I'm saying

01:10:03.000 I'm just saying

01:10:03.740 You are the smoothest

01:10:05.000 Talking white boy

01:10:05.840 I've ever seen in my life

01:10:06.900 But dressed like a white boy

01:10:08.380 Put me in coach

01:10:09.560 I'm ready

01:10:10.120 I'm going to hook you

01:10:11.700 I got a

01:10:12.180 Queen show

01:10:12.780 We got to find

01:10:13.500 Theo Vaughn

01:10:14.180 A black sister

01:10:15.060 Uh oh

01:10:16.420 She's got it

01:10:17.500 With or without kids

01:10:18.960 Huh

01:10:19.320 I could do

01:10:20.340 I think maybe one kid

01:10:21.500 Two kids

01:10:22.000 Seem like a lot

01:10:22.800 Two kids

01:10:23.320 What'd you say

01:10:24.700 What about six

01:10:26.960 No

01:10:27.780 She got six

01:10:29.060 Is she really

01:10:30.160 The lesbian have six

01:10:32.520 How

01:10:32.720 No the lesbian

01:10:33.820 Don't have any

01:10:34.440 Oh your other

01:10:35.080 She eat her babies

01:10:36.080 Oh

01:10:36.400 No

01:10:36.780 The other girl

01:10:40.420 Got six kids

01:10:41.420 Oh damn

01:10:42.660 You have six children

01:10:44.100 God damn baby

01:10:45.600 Wow

01:10:47.000 That thing hit like popcorn

01:10:48.420 That thing must

01:10:49.640 You got to put the off switch

01:10:51.100 On that bitch

01:10:51.660 You must

01:10:52.020 That thing must be stuck on

01:10:53.440 That's crazy

01:10:54.820 That's crazy man

01:10:56.020 Wow

01:10:57.140 Alright y'all

01:10:57.640 We bringing Theo

01:10:58.620 We bringing Theo Vaughn

01:11:00.020 To the black side

01:11:00.840 I am looking for him

01:11:01.900 A good black woman

01:11:02.920 Out there

01:11:03.400 And I'm going to say it

01:11:04.300 On my podcast

01:11:05.020 And we going to hook you

01:11:05.940 And we going to take you on

01:11:06.880 Send you on a black date

01:11:08.220 I'm ready

01:11:08.720 And I'll even take a real

01:11:10.020 Thug ass woman too

01:11:11.380 You know what I'm saying

01:11:12.460 I'm ready

01:11:12.920 I think you can have

01:11:14.160 A thug bitch

01:11:15.020 Yeah you know what I'm saying

01:11:15.960 I want a bitch

01:11:16.640 That'll fucking

01:11:17.140 She's driving

01:11:18.000 She's driving

01:11:19.020 She picks me up

01:11:20.180 You know what I'm saying

01:11:20.980 Bro

01:11:21.320 That's what I'm talking about

01:11:22.440 We're going to end this podcast

01:11:23.420 Right here

01:11:23.860 In the black community

01:11:25.120 They're called a low down nigga

01:11:26.380 So we ain't even going to do that

01:11:27.720 To you Theo Vaughn

01:11:29.080 Look I don't know what

01:11:30.900 I'm ready for something

01:11:31.680 Thank you Miss Payne

01:11:32.500 I got you

01:11:33.100 I got you

01:11:33.500 Now I'm just floating on the breeze

01:11:36.040 And I feel I'm falling like these leaves

01:11:38.960 I must be cornerstone

01:11:42.300 Oh but when I reach that ground

01:11:46.880 I'll share this peace of mind

01:11:49.020 I found I can feel it in my bones

01:11:53.180 But it's going to take a little time

01:11:58.860 For me to set that parking brake

01:12:02.740 And let myself unwind

01:12:05.480 Shine that light on me

01:12:09.560 I'll sit and tell you my stories

01:12:15.160 Shine on me

01:12:20.140 And I will find a song

01:12:24.380 I will sing it just for you

01:12:27.980 And now I've been moving way too fast

01:12:35.340 On the runaway train

01:12:36.720 With a heavy load of my past

01:12:40.200 And these rails that I've been riding on

01:12:45.800 They weren't so thin

01:12:47.220 That they're damn near gone

01:12:48.540 I guess now they just weren't

01:12:50.380 Ladies and gentlemen

01:12:53.380 I'm Jonathan Kite

01:12:54.580 And welcome to Kite Club

01:12:55.900 A podcast where I'll be sharing thoughts

01:12:58.140 On things like current events

01:12:59.560 Stand-up stories

01:13:00.780 And seven ways to pleasure your partner

01:13:03.100 The answer may shock you

01:13:05.000 Sometimes I'll interview my friends

01:13:07.020 Sometimes I won't

01:13:08.340 And as always

01:13:09.880 I'll be joined by the voices in my head

01:13:11.840 You have three new voice messages

01:13:14.700 A lot of people are talking about Kite Club

01:13:17.720 I've been talking about Kite Club for so long

01:13:20.520 Longer than anybody else

01:13:22.140 So great

01:13:22.940 Hi, sweetheart

01:13:24.760 Here's a deal

01:13:25.980 Anyone who doesn't listen to Kite Club

01:13:28.440 Is a dodgy bloody wanker

01:13:30.480 Jermaine

01:13:31.180 Hi, I'll take a quarter pounder with cheese

01:13:34.480 And a McFlurry

01:13:35.500 Sorry sir, but our ice cream machine is broken

01:13:37.360 I think Tom Hanks just butt dialed me

01:13:42.320 Anyway

01:13:42.780 First rule of Kite Club is

01:13:44.720 Tell everyone about Kite Club

01:13:46.440 Second rule of Kite Club is

01:13:48.380 Tell everyone about Kite Club

01:13:50.620 Third rule

01:13:51.400 Like and subscribe

01:13:52.560 Wherever you listen to podcasts

01:13:54.020 Or watch us on YouTube, yeah?

01:13:56.620 And yes, don't worry

01:13:57.680 My Brad Pitt impression will get better

01:13:59.720 And yes, don't worry

01:14:00.720 I'll take a quarter pounder with Kite Club

01:14:01.720 I'll take a quarter pounder with Kite Club

01:14:02.720 I'll take a quarter pounder with Kite Club

This Past Weekend with Theo Von - March 10, 2022

E383 Ms. Pat

Episode Stats

Length

Words per Minute

Word Count

Sentence Count

Misogynist Sentences

Hate Speech Sentences

Summary

Transcript