E396 Albuquerque
Episode Stats
Length
1 hour and 8 minutes
Words per Minute
156.99535
Summary
Rocky reminisces about the days when it was cold enough to freeze his toes off in the grocery store and the people who helped him open the door to the root beer cooler at the local Wal-Mart in the early 20th century.
Transcript
00:00:00.000
We hope you're enjoying your Air Canada flight.
00:00:10.720
Fast-free Wi-Fi means I can make dinner reservations before we land.
00:00:25.260
Wi-Fi available to Airplane members on Equipped Flight.
00:00:38.040
You know, I used to go to the water park by my house growing up.
00:00:43.040
And it wasn't real close to us, but it was, you know, close enough.
00:01:03.500
You know, the biggest attractions out there, they had a water slide.
00:01:09.640
And they had, allegedly, they had the coldest root beer in the area.
00:01:15.940
So you'd go in there and people would be like, it ain't that cold, I can handle it, you know.
00:01:22.720
You know, people drive down from the north, you know, from Canada and Saskatchewan.
00:01:32.000
They'd drive down, I can handle it, I can handle it.
00:01:37.320
And I remember you'd go in the general store over there at that water park.
00:01:49.260
And, man, it was, when you even opened the door to that general store, it was frosty in there.
00:01:53.780
And, you'd see the Polar Express go by in the distance.
00:02:04.660
And, you'd get in there and you'd be barefoot because you'd just come from the, you'd just come from the water slide in the pool.
00:02:15.860
And, you'd be barefoot rocking around in there.
00:02:21.620
I remember as a child trying to get back close to the cooler where that root beer was.
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I remember there was an old woman by the baked beans one time.
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And, I just, damn, got right up in between her legs for a minute, honestly.
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And, you'd get, finally, you'd get back near the thing.
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And, you'd have, you, two or three of us kids pulling on that root beer on the, uh, the cage it was in.
00:03:02.100
You know, because it was just, it was so powerful and so cold.
00:03:06.640
And, you'd have to pull on that door and get your little buddy, help me.
00:03:13.560
And, little Daniel would be over there on the other, he'd be pushing against the damn door.
00:03:20.060
And, he's over there just, you know, he's leaning on that back, like, dang, come on, man.
00:03:36.240
I mean, it had been, you know, it was cold in there.
00:03:42.180
You'd have a damn, uh, um, you know, a little, uh, a damn penguin come walking out that bitch.
00:03:52.940
And, he'd been in there looking at pornography.
00:03:55.120
And, you're like, damn, how do, you know, how can he even touch himself?
00:04:05.120
But, he'd get that, the, the, uh, glass door open.
00:04:08.100
And, all these root bears would be sitting there.
00:04:19.620
And, the lady at the counter was like, close the door.
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And, you, at that moment, you damned the makers of the root beer.
00:04:39.860
Because, why they put it in this cold, the can is cold.
00:04:45.660
And, you got, and then you bounce that thing all the way up to the register.
00:05:02.740
And, that lady would be like, you know, 65 cents.
00:05:14.980
And, you put your money up there and you get it.
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And, then you couldn't take your hands off the can.
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I remember one time my hands got stuck to the can.
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I looked like a, you know, like one of those guys outside of a, of a Macy's or something at Christmas.
00:05:57.720
You know, trying to, you know, beg for money shaking that can.
00:06:01.120
You know, I couldn't, you just couldn't get my hands off of the can.
00:06:21.880
And, you'd sip that and it'd make your lips all red and pretty.
00:06:32.760
They'd be pedophiles out there living out there barbecuing.
00:06:37.040
You'd see a guy in the distance out there, you know, putting damn lotion on his arms.
00:06:41.560
And, grilling up a couple, uh, um, Johnson's brats.
00:07:04.840
I miss that about being a child when everything was an adventure.
00:07:07.420
Those days of even just being out there at Lando Pines Water Park.
00:07:22.420
You know, everything, when you're young, everything was an adventure.
00:09:06.120
You know, and that's what you have to believe that you're on the come up.
00:09:11.040
Believing that there's something that you are on a, on a, on a forward turn.
00:09:20.420
That you're on a, that your projection overall is upward.
00:09:31.700
If you're feeling like you don't, I hope you, I hope you're able to just, to remodel that.
00:09:36.900
And don't listen to yourself for a second and listen to me.
00:09:39.520
And let me tell you that you are on the come up.
00:09:45.680
You are on whatever you're going through or dealing with or been dealt with.
00:09:51.620
You know, you playing blackjack with the, with, with the devil, baby.
00:09:55.040
That's a life is just, you sitting right there.
00:10:03.800
You know, it's just, so whatever you've been dealt or you, whatever you're dealing with,
00:10:22.220
Man, I, oh, I got to go see Hank Williams Jr. last night.
00:10:29.860
And if you haven't seen this man, you know, Thunderhead, baby, you know what I'm talking about.
00:10:41.460
He's a real, he's a real, he's like a, like a, he's a, I mean, he is just a damn super honky.
00:10:59.260
He's a real, he's got, I mean, he's got music, he's got music built into him.
00:11:06.480
You pat him on the back, a damn ballad will come out of him.
00:11:10.580
I bet when they burped him as a baby, I bet, uh, you know, a couple of B flats fell right off his tongue.
00:11:16.520
I mean, that felt, he just, he's got this gumption in him.
00:11:33.180
He's like, you know, he's, he's, he's probably also a lactose free legend.
00:11:36.960
And because I don't know if legendary is, I don't know what that, I don't know if that's cheese based or what it is.
00:11:58.660
He's this, he's kind of this fat cat that's never been neutered kind of, you know, he just, it was interesting to watch him.
00:12:12.780
Um, I've gotten to know some of his family over the years, uh, mildly, you know, just by acquaintance.
00:12:19.980
And, uh, anyway, I got to go see him play live and that was, uh, that was quite a treat.
00:12:24.900
Him and, uh, Dan Auerbach from the Black Keys were over there and a lot of other beautiful women and men, I think.
00:12:37.360
It could have been a man, could have been a thicker woman.
00:12:40.180
Not sure the angle I was at, you know, I don't know.
00:12:43.380
But anyway, beautiful music and, uh, and just a good time.
00:12:49.180
And also, I'll tell you what else I got to see.
00:12:54.900
I got to see you guys, uh, went out to Albuquerque over there.
00:13:07.380
It's like, how many car cars are in Albuquerque?
00:13:16.320
And I said, and they trick you because they want to hear you say it.
00:13:18.860
Because they know you can't say it well because nobody can.
00:13:27.000
And the man said, I said, I'm happy to be here.
00:13:41.860
Albuquerque, Albuquerque, Albuquerque, Albuquerque.
00:13:48.100
If you look at it on the map, it says A-L-B-E-R-K-K-K-K-K-K-K.
00:13:59.360
One of the Qs has a line going over the top of it.
00:14:06.020
And one of the Qs, if you look real close, you can see him over there carrying a couple other little Qs on his little.
00:14:10.780
You know, his little hip or whatever that thing is.
00:14:31.780
Them people, thank you, first of all, for coming out.
00:14:36.680
That one was a little tough in that venue, I felt like.
00:15:39.720
And dude, the crazy part is everybody there is talking about aliens.
00:15:50.260
We went to a Love's gas station because everything shuts down in Abbey.
00:16:03.500
Because one of the Ubers, the man said, I ain't coming over there.
00:16:40.560
And we just didn't want to kind of, he was, he was a lot, he was walking around, but you
00:16:50.120
So it was just one of those, he's almost like one of those, like on a game, on a video game.
00:16:55.400
If you don't get close to them, they don't know you're there, kind of.
00:16:58.120
So like, all right, let's just maneuver around this little guardian of the Greyhound.
00:17:12.580
Yeah, but everybody there, they talk about the alien, but the aliens are there amongst
00:17:18.700
And we went to a gas station and this guy in there was just walking like, just like,
00:17:24.940
he moved like his head, he kept moving his arms up above his heads while he walked.
00:17:38.140
And everybody there had a parole officer with them.
00:17:59.420
Yeah, I tried to do meet and greets after the shows in most of the city.
00:18:04.140
I tried to pop out and say, hey, if I have the energy for it.
00:18:07.840
And we made it over there through Midland and Lubbock.
00:18:11.840
And we made it over there through, where else were we?
00:18:21.560
And then we, you know, this past week we made it through Georgia and over there to Alabama.
00:18:28.020
And, oh, oh, also in Albuquerque, they're like, dog, you got to try the chilies, dog.
00:18:59.000
And the other dude, I know you're not supposed to talk about what happens in meetings.
00:19:18.560
So it was just like, dang, bro, you got to watch that stuff.
00:19:23.260
So if you're at a meeting and a guy takes his shoes off, dude.
00:19:29.520
And he started doing that cat's cradle thing with his shoelaces.
00:19:34.020
He took them out of his shoes and was doing cat's cradle with them.
00:19:40.140
But in Abbey, they always want you to try the green chilies.
00:19:49.760
People are like, dog, my cousin got attacked by two guys with lightsabers, you know?
00:20:02.200
It's like, man, my friend got run over by a Volkswagen.
00:20:11.740
People are like, dude, man, my wife fell off a building last week.
00:20:16.700
And it was, you know, nobody knows what happened.
00:20:37.880
Everybody in Albuquerque seem like they are waiting for a Greyhound bus,
00:20:58.140
And they're just, there's not even near any tracks.
00:21:19.080
Then we made it through Lubbock and Midland and over to Dallas.
00:21:39.320
I want to let you know that, oh, I will be in Florida in two weeks.
00:22:01.100
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00:23:18.300
then I recommend that you do not gamble and that you reach out for help.
00:23:26.320
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00:23:29.860
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00:23:33.060
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00:23:37.620
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00:24:01.100
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00:24:30.160
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00:25:14.160
Just seeing everybody's faces, getting to shake hands with people.
00:25:17.500
Um, and just to be in the same room, you know, uh, I wish I could just spend the hour
00:25:25.140
or just get off the stage and just walk around and just give a damn hug to everyone.
00:25:28.420
Um, but, uh, but we did what we could and thank you to everybody that came out.
00:25:40.820
Now that thing had some, I mean, it was, I mean, that thing, it looked like it had, it
00:25:46.740
was just made out of dang, uh, you know, like, um, it would just like, it would just
00:25:58.900
It was, uh, I know there was a pair of, um, men's boots, small men's boots under my bed.
00:26:09.300
I thought there was children's boots when I saw them.
00:26:12.940
And it's a little creepy to have children's boots under your bed on a bus.
00:26:19.120
And the bedding looked like they had just beaten it out of Clint Eastwood.
00:26:22.300
Like somebody tied it up and they just punched him so many times that a damn, you know, bedroom
00:26:30.540
It was just had her old, you know, uh, older motif kind of, uh, Western kind of, uh, you
00:26:38.120
know, uh, kind of like somebody, you know, so I don't know you could, I bet it felt like
00:26:45.200
something bad had happened to native Americans in the area of the blanket.
00:26:48.540
But that's what it felt like if it was an old blanket anyway, they had children's boots
00:26:53.400
under the bed, but on the back of the children's boot, it said men's on it.
00:26:59.100
And that's when you got to really question what's going on.
00:27:04.180
When somebody's writing men's on the back of a children's boot.
00:27:16.160
Um, a lot of people came out, people with damn tits, people, one leg, no leg, half, dude
00:27:24.240
came out half a head, dude came out no teeth, bro, lost all his teeth, he said.
00:27:34.020
So, I don't know what he, he also, he started saying something else, I had no idea what he
00:27:37.080
said, because the teeth help a little when you word now, but that fella came out, a couple
00:27:41.740
of people with wet hands came out, I remember that.
00:27:45.200
Um, somebody, oh, people left gifts, uh, a lot of nice things, this and that.
00:27:51.620
Um, and then we hit also, uh, some other places out there, Savannah, uh, and, um, Augusta, Georgia.
00:28:04.560
And that, I mean, some of these towns, you get out, I mean, Augusta, there's nothing downtown.
00:28:09.620
There's not even a goat, you can't even, they don't even do, uh, Montgomery we went to, Alabama.
00:28:15.820
You know, um, and that's Rosa Parks country over there.
00:28:19.180
And Rosa Dunn Park somewhere else, because there's nobody downtown there either.
00:28:24.200
That place, I mean, they didn't even have ghosts.
00:28:28.780
And now I thought, saw things that ghost tours closed.
00:28:36.220
And that's when it's, you know, when not only do humans leave, but then even the spirit,
00:28:41.480
you know, you know, that there's a, there's a bus full of, you know, just realms and,
00:28:55.540
Just stops and there's no, the license and registration is just nothing is sitting there.
00:29:12.440
And, uh, I wish I'd have gotten to say to everyone in person, but just a lot of kind messages and,
00:29:21.820
Um, oh, my boy, tight Ernie came out growing up.
00:29:26.820
This fellow we grew up in named tight Ernie and he was tight, boy.
00:29:30.600
His body was just damn, I mean, just condensed like a damn twix, bro.
00:29:35.100
You know, his spine was real narrow, you know, like one of those kind of fat orange extension cords.
00:29:42.120
That bitch was real, I mean, it was a, just a, you know, it was a, just a, you know, it was that, it was a,
00:29:55.560
His whole body was tight and condensed, you know?
00:29:58.960
Um, if he lifted his right arm, you know, to shake your hand, his left leg would go up.
00:30:04.340
He was just, his whole body was just real condensed like that.
00:30:07.520
And, uh, they call him tight Ernie, baby, and he's, you know, he could hear, I mean, his son,
00:30:12.680
and when he, his windpipe was tight, he was, you know, he had that tight pipe on him.
00:30:24.280
He's going, he's going, he's going, he's going, he's going, he's going, tomorrow is my birthday.
00:30:35.100
I mean, like, his daddy had just damn fucked a flute, you know what I'm talking about.
00:30:40.740
Somebody in that family, you know, got a little, uh, risque with a, um, what is it?
00:30:50.140
You know, somebody definitely, somebody was, somebody was putting wood into a woodwind, baby,
00:30:55.200
in that family because that dude, fucking damn, boy.
00:30:59.020
And I grew up with that fella, man, so it was just crazy to see him.
00:31:01.800
And some folks brought him out because he can't drive, he can't handle that steering wheel.
00:31:06.400
You know, watching him drive, it's like if you see somebody put one of those, the club,
00:31:09.620
they used to put the club on their car, on the steering wheel so nobody would steal it.
00:31:17.920
You know, he's just built like a damn, um, you know, he's built like a, uh,
00:31:29.560
Oh, yeah, he's built like a damn oboe or a bass clarinet, bro.
00:31:47.100
I want to get to you guys calling in and, uh, just hear what's up with y'all, you know?
00:31:50.960
Um, but yeah, I'm just trying to stay alive and stay happy and stay well, man,
00:31:59.680
and I hope that's the same thing that you are doing.
00:32:09.400
Um, I felt like it was something else fun I was going to tell you, but I might have forgot it.
00:32:18.220
Oh, the bus broke down and they gave us a new bus.
00:32:23.340
But we drove for like nine hours just in the back of the bus.
00:32:29.100
I mean, just, you know, like somebody just like the toaster, you know, just like a little toaster.
00:32:37.540
Finally, I wanted to put damn butter on my back and eat my ass, bro.
00:32:41.980
It just, you know, I wanted to put a dang little, uh, preserves up and down my legs and back
00:32:47.620
because I was lightly, just a little bit browned on the outside, brother.
00:32:55.020
That affirmative action stroller, that's what we were in because I was just baked when I
00:33:02.620
Now, before we get into, um, the new, the, the calls, let's get into a little bit of news,
00:33:13.740
I take my news straight out of the nearest Asian, baby, right off the press, baby.
00:33:25.160
You, you, you freaking get to know a good Asian person and that's facts, son.
00:33:30.000
Xerox ain't got shit on a good Vietnamese friend, brother, Polynesian.
00:33:42.440
You sound, um, your voice sounds a little bit deeper.
00:33:52.240
Have you been doing any different activities, you know, uh, do you give a birthday?
00:33:57.780
Have you been, um, eating anything that would make you sound strong or doing any thing like
00:34:06.480
You've been watching any, uh, fights or Westerns, anything going like that in your world?
00:34:11.600
Um, I've been drinking lots of protein powder, eating lots of protein.
00:34:27.100
And what are some of your long-term goals with, uh, fitness?
00:34:39.760
Ah, it's hard to trust a fully lean family, I've always thought.
00:34:43.360
If I see a family and everybody's lean, it's hard to, it's hard to trust everybody over
00:34:58.400
And what do you, what do you think it was caused by?
00:35:00.260
Damn, baby, that's the Lord's Fruity Pebble Dog and you had that bitch, huh?
00:35:05.320
Um, I'm supposed to find out from the doctor in a little bit.
00:35:11.600
No, they didn't let me keep it, but I caught it and it's like very, very small.
00:35:26.220
Cause I don't know if those are catch and release or not.
00:35:28.360
I don't know what the legal, I don't know what they let you do there.
00:35:31.660
Uh, I don't know what the, you know, park rangers or whatever would do with that, but
00:35:37.000
cause I'd be, you know, I'd be, damn, you get pulled over and you got five or six of
00:35:41.040
those in your, you know, in your car or whatever.
00:35:48.840
He took them one out at a party and drank three of them.
00:35:51.820
And then he had to get them, um, surgically removed out of his, uh, penis.
00:36:11.200
And when I need a, when I just need something to pick me up, he's got a fork, a spoon.
00:36:15.860
And then I need something to just ding, you know, just slice right into my damn heart.
00:36:40.400
And you know what it is, man, and I don't want to say this, really, and I don't know this.
00:36:59.040
But a lot of, uh, uh, uh, Disney is known, it's really a hotbed for, um, a lot of gay men go work.
00:37:10.920
It's their first step out into, uh, a place where they're really, I think, you know, a lot of, it's a mecca for gay men.
00:37:18.240
It's basically the wailing wall in a lot of ways, or it's like, um, what's another mecca, Riley?
00:37:37.420
No, that's, that's, no, like a popular, popular place that people go to.
00:37:44.620
Like a, you know, a national monument or something.
00:37:51.040
It's, um, you know, it's like a, uh, Disneyland has long been a hotbed for, it's like a, it's kind of a, uh, homoerotic sort of, um, a halfway house.
00:38:14.820
And, um, and so I don't want to, I don't know what this is.
00:38:18.480
Maybe this guy doesn't believe in opposite sex marriage or something.
00:38:28.320
I'm saying that that could be something that has occurred.
00:38:32.680
Um, there could be some opposition to that in that realm.
00:38:35.680
Um, uh, you also, uh, maybe they just don't let people get married there.
00:38:43.500
Because if you notice, a lot of the different, um, cartoons don't have parents.
00:38:50.340
They want you to believe they all magically occurred and there wasn't any sex, you know?
00:38:54.020
Nobody wants to think of like a wet, uh, what's a popular Disney character, Riley Mal?
00:39:03.360
Nobody wants to think of a, you know, Mickey Mouse covered in amniotic.
00:39:08.220
And a little, you know, maybe a couple of duties under him or whatever from a crazy birth.
00:39:13.220
You know, from coming down the damn, um, you know, the, uh, Thunder Mountain.
00:39:22.780
But, uh, yeah, I guess they, they, they, the man said no.
00:39:28.500
And come back with a, come back with a pretty little, come back with a buddy.
00:39:38.920
I think if you, you see that in the wedding video, it just promotes Disneyland.
00:39:52.740
Oh, uh, some TikTok pediatricians urge people to stop sharing dangerous baby formula recipes.
00:40:02.960
Were you, uh, were you on the, on the bag or were you on the tit?
00:40:15.320
Even if you purse your lips a little, does anything come back to your memory?
00:40:24.980
But they say, yeah, people making dirty baby formula on here.
00:40:32.400
You know, people are doing stuff on ticket, tick, tick, tick, tick, tick, tick, tick.
00:40:42.520
They have people said they came back from the past and shit on there.
00:40:48.980
And, you know, I guess it's, you know, I think if you go in there to get a recipe for, you
00:40:54.300
know, a, um, a booyah base or a good soup, that's quality.
00:40:58.400
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Let's get into a couple of calls here from you guys.
00:44:44.200
Theo, it's Jonah from Seattle, Washington, man.
00:44:51.220
And Jonah is a name of a famous whale, too, if you ever looked at that in the Bible or
00:44:56.880
in, I don't know if it's in the Bible or if it's just outside of the Bible, but Jonah
00:45:07.720
In Seattle area, man, we get pretty crazy with the weed, man.
00:45:12.040
And, you know, I grew up, ever since I was 13, been smoking weed.
00:45:16.360
And it's definitely an area of my life that, you know, nothing wrong with it, but it's an
00:45:20.540
area of my life I want to grow in because I can tell it's definitely taking a strong grip.
00:45:30.700
It's like walking around with a, you know, just a pillow, just, you know, party.
00:45:58.200
That's weed in my life, you know, and I definitely don't know how it is in Louisiana.
00:46:04.060
I was wondering, out there in Louisiana, man, what does it look like dealing with the people
00:46:13.760
I grew up in Louisiana, and it's a beautiful place, dude.
00:46:16.660
If you believe in beauty, then you believe in that state.
00:46:20.840
And it's one of the top 50 states, and it's Louisiana Purchase.
00:46:26.460
So, half y'all would be Canadian if we hadn't done the deal.
00:46:40.140
You know, you get that swamp gas, baby, and it start huffing it up.
00:46:47.540
Or a damn little falcon, half a falcon nut in that bastard.
00:46:53.380
That thing, bro, you'd take a hit of it, and the water level in your yard would rise.
00:47:09.340
That shit was that, you know, that fucking, that.
00:47:30.300
You get a bag of weed on it, and if you didn't want to, uh.
00:47:48.720
You'd have your brain just fucking looking for itself, bro.
00:47:52.260
You know, you could feel your brain looking for itself, dog.
00:47:56.980
That shit will have you singing the national anthem, bro.
00:48:02.660
That shit will have you singing the national anthem to a spice rack, dog.
00:48:08.040
Yeah, getting high in Louisiana was fun, man, as a child.
00:48:18.320
And I remember we used to be over at my buddy's house.
00:48:27.060
His daddy wasn't super fond of gays at the time.
00:48:36.620
So me and my friend and my other friend, we'd go outside.
00:48:45.380
I would know about that kind of gay trigger he had.
00:48:50.440
You know, they were kind of being a little, I don't know what they were doing, sir.
00:48:55.880
They just, I saw him kind of like, you know, somebody took their shirt off for no reason outside.
00:49:02.360
I just, some of the stuff has just made me uncomfortable, right?
00:49:05.700
So then my two buddies would come back into the house, stoned out the gills, baby.
00:49:11.160
I mean, just fucking fish food, and baby, they wasn't doing well.
00:49:15.000
And now suddenly my buddy's dad is grilling them about being gay.
00:49:18.520
And they don't know that I told the dad the stuff.
00:49:21.120
So I used to love that kind of shit, man, creating ambiance, you know, creating ambiance that, you know, that shit was just so good.
00:49:44.160
Do you believe that getting high could lead people to homosexuality?
00:49:51.120
I mean, there's a lot of, there was a lot of drug-induced gay activity when I was young, but that was higher octane drugs.
00:50:02.340
You're looking at methamphetamine, you're looking at stuff like that.
00:50:05.140
But low-grade branch dope, I don't know if that would get somebody all the way to the, you know, onto another fellow's peg or sweat wallet, you know, if it's women.
00:50:24.540
I've just recently started dating this girl, and she's got two nipple piercings.
00:50:32.400
But I also want to know what your thoughts are on the listeners' thoughts on chicks or dudes with nipple piercings.
00:50:38.980
Look, man, I think it says, for one, that they, you know, they got no excuse not to have a spare house key on them.
00:50:49.280
They should be able to usually get one extra hanging on there, you know, so that's not a bad deal at all.
00:50:55.020
That nipple piercing, I think it's kind of, it definitely seems sexy on a woman when you think she's got nails right through her tits, you know.
00:51:05.120
That's really, there's something erotic and almost biblical about it, you know, because they put God on the cross, baby.
00:51:13.180
So everybody kind of has had their moment in the, you know, in the metal sun, if you will.
00:51:19.560
So I don't think it's insane to want to get pierced up and put holes in your body or something like that.
00:51:25.680
And I think if a woman got it, you know, I actually made love to a woman recently, and she had, she was really, she had some piercings on her.
00:51:33.880
You know, she had them hooters really, she had them, you know, I mean, she'd taken them hooters to damn Home Depot, baby.
00:51:43.020
She had some real, you know, she had some real metallurgy done on those things.
00:51:50.480
I mean, it could have been a welder hanging off the bottom of one of them bitches, baby.
00:51:53.420
She had them things, she had some real, you know, she had some, one of them had a damn door knocker on it.
00:52:07.800
You know, I remember one time I was doing a tour somewhere in Africa with military, British military, I think.
00:52:14.840
And I fell in there, he pulled out his wiener, and he had a big piercing on it, and it looked insane, bro.
00:52:22.080
And I think the guy was, you know what I'm saying?
00:52:26.680
I think the guy had smoked a little too much weed, if you know what I'm saying, bro.
00:52:43.920
I appreciate you guys, as always, hitting the hotline, 985-664-9503.
00:52:57.120
I've been watching your podcast for a while now, and how would you take this, or I don't even know how to word it.
00:53:12.540
I fucked my best friend's mom, and she won't leave me alone now.
00:53:29.320
Well, I think it's a question of what kind of friend are you, brother?
00:53:36.020
You know, if you made love to your buddy's mother, of course she's going to like you.
00:53:41.080
Because if it's your best friend, he likes you.
00:53:43.980
So, you're just, you know, he came out of her, so you're going back to the, you know, you're going back to the front porch of his creation and hanging out there.
00:54:00.680
So, I think you got to just hit for the cycle, dude, and be a damn stepdad, brother.
00:54:14.280
Somebody that's working over there at the Dunkin' Donuts at the drive-thru or something?
00:54:19.020
Somebody that's, you know, some weird person that when they go to a restaurant, they like fill their hand up with like salt or sugar and dip their finger in it while they're waiting to eat dinner?
00:54:30.760
And lick it and then lick the salt or sugar off?
00:54:36.840
Or are you going to date your best friend's mom?
00:54:40.000
And go in there and be a champion, not only for her, but for your friend.
00:54:47.440
Imagine one day you sit down with your buddy and say, hey, man, I love you so much as a friend that I'm going to take care of your mother for the rest of her life.
00:54:58.480
When you come over, I'm going to grill for you.
00:55:04.460
I'm going to fucking make you, try and make you rake the yard.
00:55:06.860
And I'm going to fist fight you in your mother and I's own yard.
00:55:45.080
And thank you for spending your time over there.
00:56:01.600
At least I have been for the past two years and I was a drunk.
00:56:06.720
I'm finally realizing everything and trying to be better, but apparently it's too late.
00:56:13.960
So, you know, I was wondering if you had any advice on how to keep on going, man.
00:56:46.200
Because, you know, it sounds like you have some realization now.
00:56:57.900
That the way you've been operating has investment service in you.
00:57:06.000
You know, I don't have a wife or child or anything like that.
00:57:13.840
I know it breaks your heart to see you make the choice to not choose them.
00:57:24.160
You know, I can relate to making choices that don't serve you.
00:57:34.900
Or, you know, I can relate to making a choice that I know isn't good for myself.
00:57:45.360
So, that's where I'm going to try to relate to you at.
00:57:49.940
For one, thank you for even thinking to bring this up.
00:57:53.540
Because I'm sure a lot of people struggle with this kind of stuff.
00:57:56.920
And I say that I'm glad you're getting, you know, I'm glad you're suffering.
00:58:01.260
But I'm glad that you're having some realization.
00:58:04.240
Because there's some realization there in that suffering.
00:58:11.400
We need something to adjust the perspective enough so we can see that the operating we're doing isn't doing us well.
00:58:18.740
And if I'm not operating well, then that means that there's something wrong with the operation or the operator.
00:58:27.860
Because I'm not choosing the best choices that are making me feel good.
00:58:38.220
And for me, that's where, you know, going, leaning back into my program, 12 steps, that kind of stuff helps immensely.
00:58:44.640
It does magic behind the scenes that you can't even quantify.
00:59:02.220
And shame is what, shame is that, shame is a trickster.
00:59:07.020
Shame's, you know, shame plays a dirty trombone, dog.
00:59:20.420
Because he's a dirty, shame is a dirty, because you start hearing, feeling your own shame.
00:59:31.480
So anyway, man, I was saying a lot of that stuff because now you have some perspective.
00:59:35.660
So now you can see you've got to make some adjustments so that you're making different choices towards the people you care about the most.
00:59:48.760
I don't want to be talking serious with you and not be able to see you, or as best I can.
00:59:52.740
You know, it's hard to choose love sometimes in the world.
01:00:06.780
And I don't know why you're not doing it in your life.
01:00:12.960
But there's a lot of people out there not doing it.
01:00:19.660
I'm choosing something else, and I don't know why.
01:00:27.200
What I do have to do is just get myself into a place where I'm choosing the things I need to be choosing.
01:00:32.300
And so that's where I believe that a 12-step program can help you out.
01:00:35.840
Because that has been the best success that I've had.
01:00:39.980
that program I feel like has best given me the opportunity
01:00:45.360
and the different feelings inside to have a new experience.
01:00:53.540
She can't tell you that everything's going to be okay right now.
01:01:00.300
If she throws a life preserver into the toilet,
01:01:05.980
You know, we've got to get you into a damn birdbath, dog.
01:01:21.780
You know, I think trying a 12-step program will help a lot.
01:01:23.800
Let me listen to the end again so I can hear just again in case I'm missing.
01:01:31.380
I'm finally realizing everything and trying to be better.
01:01:38.780
So, you know, I was wondering if you had any advice on how to keep on going, man.
01:01:47.020
And the advice will start to come from a higher power and from the program.
01:01:55.680
You just keep going to meetings and keep listening to people.
01:02:00.020
You can go to them on Zoom first if you feel more comfortable.
01:02:07.380
Because once you start to feel like you can keep on going, then you're going to feel like you can go further.
01:02:21.980
You will have other opportunities with this person, with this child.
01:02:31.140
But now, if you know that something's wrong and you continue to do it, then you are kind of choosing to suffer.
01:02:47.120
So once you have that knowledge, if you continue to do it, then you are choosing to suffer.
01:03:09.040
I just continue to want to have some reason to suffer.
01:03:15.580
And I just don't want to see the same thing happen to you, man, that's happened to me before.
01:03:30.780
I mean, there's probably 500,000 people listening to this that are thinking of you.
01:03:52.460
There's a feeling inside of you like the world never...
01:04:08.960
Or whatever you believe in gave you a beautiful child, man.
01:04:12.780
You have the ability to care about yourself enough to call.
01:04:27.300
Because it seems like that's what you want for you.
01:04:31.960
But just letting you know that you're not alone, baby.
01:04:35.560
And I know right where you're going to end up, bro.
01:04:53.140
Thank you to everybody that came out and saw me this week.
01:05:52.220
Thank you for loving me when I can't even love myself at times.
01:06:02.000
Man, I'd say probably six out of eight of the shows
01:06:03.800
on the past two weeks have been really just lights out.
01:06:10.080
You know, I'm kind of a perfectionist, and that's okay, you know.
01:06:19.340
So I'm grateful to be out there and get to see you guys in person, baby.
01:07:06.300
Well, if you're asking me what I really want to do
01:07:20.760
You guys are checking them out if you get a chance.
01:07:27.840
and then we'll probably hit a solo episode after that.
01:07:54.840
And as always, I'll be joined by the voices in my head.
01:08:21.540
Sorry, sir, but our ice cream machine is broken.