This Past Weekend with Theo Von - September 16, 2019


Relationship Animals | This Past Weekend #230


Episode Stats


Length

1 hour and 23 minutes

Words per minute

168.5

Word count

14,025

Sentence count

272

Harmful content

Misogyny

66

sentences flagged

Toxicity

219

sentences flagged

Hate speech

129

sentences flagged


Transcript

Transcript generated with Whisper (turbo).
Misogyny classifications generated with MilaNLProc/bert-base-uncased-ear-misogyny .
Toxicity classifications generated with s-nlp/roberta_toxicity_classifier .
Hate speech classifications generated with facebook/roberta-hate-speech-dynabench-r4-target .
00:00:00.380 Today's episode is brought to you by Gray Block Pizza.
00:00:04.620 Gray Block Pizza, 1811 Pico Boulevard on the way to the beach in Los Angeles.
00:00:11.060 Gray Block, get that hitter, baby.
00:00:14.820 Oh, man.
00:00:17.480 You know, I was a, I was a unreasonable child.
00:00:24.700 if you'd have seen me when i was a child i was i was unreasonable
00:00:31.180 you know i'd wear a tank top sometimes in the winter
00:00:35.780 and then i'd just just just yell at people about how cold i was i'm cold 0.99
00:00:43.180 and people were like we you got a tank top on and i'd be like eat my ass buddy 0.98
00:00:50.800 so i was that kind of kid you know the kind of kid that 0.97
00:00:56.340 you know i'd wear like a little rain jacket or something in new uh
00:01:01.040 in a re-k or whatever it was uh pre-k a re-k dude i was in all the k's i was a
00:01:11.260 i was in pre-k k re-k 3k i was in three that was the i think at one point i thought it was
00:01:21.400 klu klux klan but uh but it was just continual continual kindergarten and they spelled continual
00:01:29.900 with a k but i was in there man and i'd wear you know sometime a slicker like a rain slicker you
00:01:37.060 know like that really what really should be called the the 11th wonder of the world and that rain
00:01:45.040 slicker because how it's amazing how the whole force of nature rain can be stopped by just one 0.99
00:01:53.340 layer of uh of slicker plastic but i would wear that bastard i'd wear that bright yellow bastard 0.95
00:02:03.080 We're right in the dead of summer at school, and I'd be complaining in the class. 0.96
00:02:10.180 It's hot.
00:02:10.720 It's hot as hell in here, Ms. Lois.
00:02:15.000 And they'd be like, you got a slicker on, boy.
00:02:18.140 You better get that.
00:02:20.380 It ain't even raining.
00:02:21.620 You got a slicker on. 1.00
00:02:23.420 I'd be like, eat my ass, guys. 1.00
00:02:26.600 I'm doing my best. 1.00
00:02:29.420 So I think I was just probably just an unreasonable child.
00:02:59.420 Every night I feel like a fake
00:03:03.360 I would only show
00:03:04.820 Knowing nobody would call
00:03:07.540 It was me
00:03:12.360 Every night you sleep
00:03:15.500 that is um every night by jameson flood that's a music man and uh he sent that in
00:03:34.780 a long time ago whenever this uh when the pod first kicked out when this pod first just
00:03:41.800 just was that first just you know just kind of flowed into the verse bro into that uni
00:03:50.460 i want to tell you i got some new tour dates back onto the books uh 10-4 october 4th in bethlem pa
00:04:00.820 at the wind creek event center that is back on um 10-5 now that's a saturday i will be in pittsburgh
00:04:09.580 at a theater there.
00:04:11.720 I don't have the name,
00:04:12.600 but the tickets are all
00:04:14.800 on the website,
00:04:17.360 theovon.com slash tour.
00:04:19.840 Cleveland is back on.
00:04:21.280 That's October 8th.
00:04:22.920 The 9th is Indianapolis.
00:04:24.800 The 10th is Grand Rapids.
00:04:26.820 The 11th is Detroit, Michigan.
00:04:30.020 The 12th is Milwaukee, Wisconsin.
00:04:32.340 And the 13th is Madison, Wisconsin.
00:04:36.360 And those are just one show a night.
00:04:38.080 so making some adjustments to get that get a little more calm
00:04:42.600 to get a little little bit more calm in my water you know some of the water inside of me
00:04:49.740 some of my it's just been it's been damn drastic like these hurricanes coming in they have a new
00:04:57.000 hurricane i think y'all y'all brett or something this thing who knows i don't know i will say this
00:05:04.900 If they're going to build a wall, let's build it over there on Florida and stop these.
00:05:08.180 Because some of these canes are coming in illegally.
00:05:10.300 I will say that. 0.99
00:05:12.120 A lot of canes rolling into this bastard on the IL, bro. 0.99
00:05:17.820 And that's short for illegal. 0.99
00:05:21.140 I got information here, too, man.
00:05:23.220 I'm not going to do the film in Atlanta.
00:05:28.360 I got there, did the training.
00:05:32.160 Everything was cool.
00:05:33.060 and the part was just for the amount of time commitment
00:05:38.380 and for the sacrifice of shows
00:05:41.840 and of other stuff I have going on here.
00:05:48.200 Once I saw the part, it just wasn't for me.
00:05:52.780 It was too much on the scale of,
00:05:56.980 oh, you can't be there for eight to 10 weeks
00:06:01.120 uh for this role so the role just didn't fit um you know i thought about it and talked with
00:06:12.340 you know people i trust and friends and people who are have more experience than i do
00:06:19.820 for a few days and got that you know communication i got straight communication with others
00:06:26.920 and um and that was that and then i just made that choice i talked to to uh the director
00:06:34.340 um talked to chris pratt about it and that was that uh and that was my decision
00:06:39.620 um there was no ill will there was no bad vibes um you know it was just at some point i just had
00:06:48.340 to trust my instincts it was just like oh for me right now this role you know um
00:06:55.720 and i didn't i didn't get to see the script before i went so there wasn't the opportunity
00:07:02.960 for me to see what my part was going to be and i think there was a little bit of miscommunication
00:07:09.280 um but i don't think it was anybody's fault uh and and that was that i'm thankful that i was able to
00:07:18.480 decommit without causing any problems and i'm grateful that i even you know was considered
00:07:28.380 and that i even had the opportunity um to do it you know i think there's some parts about it that
00:07:35.060 i'll miss out on doing you know but it was just the time commitment for uh the stuff for this
00:07:43.180 for the role for what the role ended up being for me wasn't it just didn't work for me it didn't
00:07:51.500 work for me um and some people will be like well you know you i mean you got to take it it's a
00:07:58.560 movie but you know i have a lot i mean i have uh you know i already have enough kind of
00:08:03.440 responsibilities going on and um and that was it that was just a choice i had to trust my instincts
00:08:09.500 you know i had to trust my instincts and that was uh and that was it so i'm bummed man i had you
00:08:16.180 know i had visions in my head of eating hot dogs and stuff with uh with christopher pratt's and
00:08:22.240 doing you know maybe you know having a second hot dog or sitting and chatting and you know
00:08:29.600 conversations going well we're talking about baseball or something or having a couple peanuts
00:08:33.940 or something and i had you know visions like that in my head you know us doing something
00:08:40.560 maybe going to a i don't know doing you know throwing coins in a wishing well or something
00:08:49.620 and just hoping for the best or you know maybe you know maybe um i had visions of us maybe uh
00:08:59.720 you know driving in like a jeep or something but nothing wild or anything nothing sexual or
00:09:06.180 anything like that i just had you know fun ideas in my head you know or maybe us you know doing
00:09:11.760 you know nothing crazy but just looking for you know maybe looking at art or something you know
00:09:18.080 somewhere or um you know or maybe throwing those uh circus peanuts those beautiful little you know
00:09:26.340 orange you know soft hard hitters throwing those into each other's mouths and stuff from kind of
00:09:31.860 close range but then getting further and further apart you know you know until it got too dark out
00:09:37.040 to see them and throw them back and forth and catch them in your mouths but oh but but you know
00:09:43.540 that's that and and you know i yeah i know that like if i get to be in a film or something it's
00:09:51.040 not going to be you know it isn't in my movie you know um but i do want to be able to be in a role
00:09:59.900 where i feel like i can at least do some stuff that you get that my personality maybe works well
00:10:07.920 in um and yeah and this wasn't anybody's fault it was just sort of just kind of you know i just
00:10:18.040 had to trust my instincts and stuff once i once i was able to you know read the part and look at it
00:10:24.140 and i still think christopher pratt's probably one of the top
00:10:27.340 you know 15 or maybe i don't know you know 18 or even probably i don't know i bet he'd be on
00:10:37.000 god's fantasy team though and so you know that's all good and communication was there was a upfront
00:10:45.160 communication and um and yeah hopefully there'll be maybe be some other opportunities uh we'll see
00:10:52.260 you know uh but that you know i just had to kind of trust my instincts
00:10:55.820 and we and and and if i sound down right now well it's because
00:11:04.020 drew breeze got hurt man he got hurt
00:11:11.820 and you know you could just and it's so funny i was watching the game and the saint this uh
00:11:19.380 new orleans saints and the los angeles rams who most people even have not even heard of that team
00:11:26.820 but they were going at it and it was exciting right in the beginning and and then drew breeze
00:11:34.980 got hurt and it was so funny i would have rather watched when the camera would cut to him you got
00:11:40.040 to see somebody you know here he is he's 40 years old and and the injury looks kind of like it could
00:11:45.800 be bad you know he couldn't even pick up a football and it just uh he couldn't even grip that freaking 0.99
00:11:51.840 pig that little that little you know deceased brown pig isn't it crazy that a football is a pig 0.99
00:11:58.860 that it used to be a pig and now it's just you know they cut off the head and tied off the ends 0.98
00:12:04.220 of it and put those white you know tried to kind of give it some white stitches or something by the
00:12:09.180 liver and now they're throwing it around man i mean this you know we think we're so far removed
00:12:16.540 from um what is it called uh not the ice age or something but um bestiality no um you know we
00:12:30.600 think we're so far removed from i don't know what it's called neolithic the neopale uh old
00:12:39.120 days the old days let's agree with that we think we're so far removed from the old days but then
00:12:45.000 here you see you know a bunch of guys throwing around that um just throwing around that 0.83
00:12:51.800 that little ripped up swine chunk and you're like damn we are we are still we are a little
00:13:00.840 bit stuck in the past you know uh but uh what was i talking about but yeah but drew breeze got hurt 0.94
00:13:07.320 And at some point I was enjoying, not enjoying, but I was, there was more, every time the
00:13:12.800 camera cut to him, man, it was just so much, it was more entertaining than the game because
00:13:17.500 I was watching this man who had, you know, this was a man who had the world on his back
00:13:23.700 and who you could tell how, just how determined he was and how focused he was in every game.
00:13:29.620 You can tell it like he's playing the game, but he's also playing this bigger game, like
00:13:36.080 what he's doing right now always seems like just a move in a grander scheme of his life
00:13:43.600 like he and he's able to do both at the same time it always seems like um and you were just seeing
00:13:51.140 him just how limited he was by the circle by the by the moment you know you could see him and he
00:13:57.380 couldn't and how limited he was by his vessel by his own body he couldn't grip that hand he
00:14:03.060 couldn't clothe that hand up and he couldn't grip a football and he couldn't express himself
00:14:09.020 you know when you started to just see a man that was limited by
00:14:14.120 you know it's like even whatever that desire that fire inside of us that that want you know
00:14:22.840 where it's all limited a little bit by the reality by the actuality of what's going on
00:14:30.720 by circumstance and man that was a much greater game to me was just seeing the look in his
00:14:36.800 eyes the mental game that was going on inside of him trying to hold his composure and trying
00:14:44.320 to trying to almost in the moment find out who he was when suddenly he was
00:14:55.980 is when suddenly the path he had been on
00:15:02.320 came to an abrupt,
00:15:07.180 like there weren't any more,
00:15:08.280 there was no more path for,
00:15:10.460 it just came to like a cul-de-sac.
00:15:13.740 And you were trying,
00:15:14.740 he had just so much energy,
00:15:16.080 so many people behind him,
00:15:17.440 I mean, so many Saints fans,
00:15:19.240 you saw him winning a championship again.
00:15:21.640 You saw him, you know,
00:15:22.900 you already had these visions of him
00:15:24.100 like hugging his kids again 1.00
00:15:25.400 under the, uh, whatever that is, um, paper, the paper, the little paper rain, um, fuck 1.00
00:15:37.280 man, my brain is stalled out, dude, what is my brain, a Datsun, this shit is, shit needs 0.99
00:15:43.920 oil, um, but you saw him stalled out, the confetti, you saw, you know, and you just 1.00
00:15:49.260 saw, and suddenly everything stopped, man, all of it, it just, and you saw him trying
00:15:55.020 to find out for a month or that's what I saw I saw a man struggling to know who he was
00:15:59.460 at this moment when the world had taken you know a different a different turn you know when
00:16:07.420 when the reality that whatever we want always isn't what's going to happen or that things
00:16:14.940 aren't going to work out perfectly or that when reality strikes you know and man and it broke
00:16:21.660 your heart as a fan it broke your heart as a human i feel like to see someone with so much
00:16:26.740 capability and so many people who look up to him or look at him as a figure of direction an example
00:16:33.200 and suddenly he uh you see him come almost even though he didn't put himself into the atmosphere
00:16:41.300 you see him um and and and i and i did i put him up in the atmosphere i put him up you see him come
00:16:48.600 back down to earth and it's uh i don't know it was man it was it was hectic man that was a hectic
00:16:56.680 moment um we got some we got we got look today you know i know that we've been you know we've
00:17:05.440 had a couple of guys recently uh that have called in the young fellow who had the surprise baby
00:17:11.040 dude that's got i mean well we're gonna check in with those people you know we're gonna give
00:17:17.500 that ring-a-ling and see what's cracking over there in their hood especially that surprised
00:17:22.200 baby boy like that's what i'm saying who is it what's going on here knock knock who's there and
00:17:30.080 then ta-da you know gestation they got that baby that hitter that zygote that's got to be crazy
00:17:38.900 if you think you know you just you screw you so we're going to find out how that all went down
00:17:45.420 because that fellow just didn't know they were having a baby.
00:17:48.420 And we will get into a call also.
00:17:52.460 I'm going to give a call over to the big dog himself, Mr. Drippy Mitts.
00:17:56.700 And that boy had that water hand, and he had that unique water hand.
00:18:01.180 And so we're going to get into some of that and just see what's going on.
00:18:05.620 We had a call that came in, and I'll get to that in just a second.
00:18:10.200 I just want to let you know we've got to pay the bill.
00:18:14.240 You know it.
00:18:15.420 The hiring process can be slow.
00:18:19.560 And you know that if you're trying to hire somebody and they come by the house and they, you know, they, I remember sometime they park in your yard. 0.99
00:18:28.840 You're not getting a job if you parked on my fucking azaleas, bro. 0.99
00:18:32.520 You out. 1.00
00:18:34.320 You know, I remember one time my mom was hiring somebody to do something in the house, fix the, uh, the cabinet had fallen down because my brother and I put a little bit of fire in it, actually. 0.84
00:18:43.840 and uh and this and this fellow fucking him and his buddy camped out in our yard for like a week 0.97
00:18:51.580 and a half and never did the work either so pieces of shit but anyway hiring can be a slow process 0.99
00:19:00.300 well cafe altura's coo dylan michowitz needed to hire a director of coffee for his organic coffee 0.98
00:19:09.320 company but he was having trouble finding qualified applicants so he switched to zip recruiter zip
00:19:15.880 recruiter it doesn't depend on candidates finding you it finds them for you what are you looking for
00:19:21.640 uh your ear ear pods nope a candidate it's technology identifies people with the right
00:19:28.140 experience and invites them to apply to your job so you get qualified candidates fast dylan posted
00:19:34.000 his job on zip recruiter and said he was impressed by how quickly he had great candidates apply
00:19:39.460 And that's how Dylan found his new director of coffee in just a few days.
00:19:43.540 With results like that, it's no wonder four out of five employers who post on ZipRecruiter
00:19:48.380 get a quality candidate within the first day.
00:19:52.040 See why ZipRecruiter is effective for businesses of all sizes.
00:19:55.700 Try ZipRecruiter for free at our web address, ZipRecruiter.com slash TPW.
00:20:02.900 That's ZipRecruiter.com slash TPW.
00:20:06.940 ZipRecruiter.com slash TPW.
00:20:09.980 ZipRecruiter, the smartest way to hire.
00:20:15.100 We got some great calls that came in.
00:20:17.860 And let's do it.
00:20:19.340 This is the last ad, and then we're going to get it through this.
00:20:21.860 This episode also, look, if you need to find somebody to work for you,
00:20:25.680 you got ZipRecruiter, okay?
00:20:27.740 If you need a skill to take to an employer, you got Skillshare.
00:20:34.360 Skillshare, boy, think about something you could do.
00:20:36.160 learn how to make a nice mole you know or mole or whatever you know what i'm talking about the
00:20:40.620 sauce you never order at the mexican place because you don't know how to say it and some people risk
00:20:46.660 thinking it's actual mole people are like damn i'm not eating mole you know i have a little cut
00:20:51.660 of owl but i ain't having any mole boy you know no mole for me skillshare is an online learning 0.71
00:20:59.240 community for creators with more than 25 000 classes in design business and more you'll
00:21:06.140 discover so many ways to fuel your curiosity and your creativity and if you want to give yourself
00:21:11.880 a new career you could have classes they have all type of learning classes in social media
00:21:17.140 mobile mobile photography creative writing even illustration all the things you wanted to do you
00:21:24.200 could do it now first you need the skill hey what's up when you got the skill no well you can
00:21:29.960 graphic design try graphic design basics core principles for visual design one of the popular
00:21:37.360 courses join the millions of students already learning on skillshare today and support the
00:21:41.960 podcast get two months of skillshare for free that's right skillshare is offering this past
00:21:48.060 weekend listeners two months of unlimited access to over 25 000 classes for free to sign up go to
00:21:53.780 Skillshare.com slash Theo Vaughn.
00:21:56.740 Again, go to Skillshare.com slash Theo Vaughn to start your two months now.
00:22:01.920 That's Skillshare.com slash Theo Vaughn.
00:22:08.220 Yeah, we have some calls that have come in.
00:22:10.260 We got a lot, you know, and I listen to all of them this weekend.
00:22:13.960 And thank you.
00:22:16.020 A lot of them, some of them is real dirty.
00:22:18.160 One guy doing just doing gas, doing body gas into the, you know, receiver.
00:22:24.600 One guy tickling somebody in his truck.
00:22:28.200 Dude.
00:22:30.440 And actually, you know what?
00:22:31.580 Thank you for that one.
00:22:32.260 That was actually probably one of the better ones.
00:22:35.080 But a lot of great calls that came in.
00:22:37.740 And so we will.
00:22:39.420 And let's get into a couple of those right now.
00:22:42.160 As always, the hotline is 985-664-9503.
00:22:47.480 And then I'm going to make a few calls of my own to some of some of the recent calls that have come in and get some follow up.
00:22:56.320 Let's get into this one, gang.
00:22:58.740 Hey, Theo Vaughn, this is Zachary Chileno calling from Cincinnati.
00:23:02.940 What's up, Zachary?
00:23:04.300 And a friend of mine actually over there in Cincinnati, he had a couple milkshakes one time and this was late at night.
00:23:10.300 and they had two sisters out there this one lady this urban uh you know this beautiful urban lady 0.99
00:23:17.320 named uh i think vasectomy i think was her name actually an exotic dancer vasectomy harper and
00:23:25.380 anyway she and this other lady were fist fighting one night in cincinnati and he went over there to
00:23:31.200 make a video of him and his pants fell down because he was kind of chubby and you know and
00:23:37.280 i guess that doesn't matter that he was chubby his pants didn't his pants first of all they 0.99
00:23:44.020 were shorts so they weren't pants and they just he just dressed like shit this man gary was his 0.98
00:23:50.580 name and so anyway his pants hit the floor and uh and he was video recording the ladies and 0.99
00:23:58.080 vasectomy and this other lady really came over and beat his ass and he tried to keep the milkshakes 0.99
00:24:01.900 without spilling them the whole time while he was getting beaten and uh and that should be a damn 0.99
00:24:08.260 olympic sport you know just just you know just riding leche if you got two you know handfuls of 0.55
00:24:15.080 you know the beautiful little sweet leche liquids and you got a couple of sisters a couple of you 1.00
00:24:22.820 know a couple of wild ladies beating that ass and you got to see you know try and keep as much 0.99
00:24:28.100 a shake as you can in the cup and maybe it could be called um cup that shake and you got to keep 1.00
00:24:34.400 as much as you can and they can only beat you for like a certain amount of time but anyway uh thank
00:24:39.180 you for calling onward and i was just trying to see if you had any advice on getting of your first
00:24:44.120 love honestly i was 18 when i first met this girl and now i'm 20 and she was my first everything
00:24:51.220 first girlfriend first love we had gotten a dog together and everything i thought
00:24:56.540 we were in it for the long run you know
00:24:58.540 and she finally broke up with me
00:25:00.720 oh you got that dog together
00:25:02.600 this is something that's going on
00:25:06.840 these days uh this is
00:25:08.780 something that is going on a relationship
00:25:10.980 animal and you gotta
00:25:12.940 shut it down
00:25:13.780 if it's a real type of animal 1.00
00:25:16.600 if it's a fish dude or you and your girl
00:25:18.720 you know y'all split a cricket or something
00:25:21.040 you know where y'all go half
00:25:22.760 she's on a little oyster you know
00:25:24.580 or a lizard bro that's fine
00:25:26.360 but once you go and get a puppy or something that can really look at you and maybe remember a little 0.99
00:25:31.560 bit of shit you know a strong mouse or whatever you're creating havoc within the nk brother the 0.99
00:25:38.720 nature kingdom because you because you got a joint animal now you got the animal she's got the animal 1.00
00:25:44.180 y'all split up what is that now he's doing what now he's all scared he starts wetting the bed at
00:25:49.660 night. You know, he hears y'all arguing in the kitchen and shit. You know, he starts eating 1.00
00:25:57.840 alone at school. You know, he starts going home with other animals that he's not even really
00:26:02.300 interested in. You know, he starts hiding under the bed. He starts, you know, he sees y'all going
00:26:07.080 y'all separate ways. You know, it's just if you get a relationship animal, it's dangerous. You
00:26:12.320 know, now you got an American water spaniel or whatever. He thinks it's his fault. You know,
00:26:18.360 he doesn't you know he quits uh you know he's staying up late at night and reading you know
00:26:24.420 reading scary novels you know you if a relationship animal it's just it's not that you can't put that
00:26:31.100 kind of pressure on an animal if you don't know you're married to the person or whatever bring
00:26:35.460 your own animals into a relationship you don't get an animal once you're together now all that
00:26:41.500 it just it's too much on that animal's back you know now you got you know next thing you know
00:26:47.440 you got a raccoon out there he's vaping by the recycling bin because he can't handle his emotions
00:26:52.280 because he doesn't know you know who still cares about him you know sure your little parakeet's
00:26:57.180 getting two christmases now but it just i think the the risks of of it outweigh the reward
00:27:08.440 yeah and these relationship animals they're the two owners they start fighting and they start
00:27:13.740 giving both of them are giving the animal a treat oh here i got a treat for you you love me you love
00:27:18.880 danny don't you and then oh i got a treat for you you love sandra and then the animal doesn't know
00:27:24.340 what to do it's just treat it out now it's all hopped up on treats it's gained 30 40 pounds 0.97
00:27:29.280 the next thing you know is down there at the damn methadone clinic so it's just you can't don't get 0.96
00:27:36.100 a relationship animal just that's really all all that place is going to be is just a cul-de-sac 0.99
00:27:41.820 where you and your partner just drive by 0.99
00:27:44.500 and just throw y'all's fucking problems 1.00
00:27:46.020 out into the street. 1.00
00:27:47.280 That's all that relationship animal is.
00:27:49.660 So if you're going to get an animal,
00:27:51.000 get an animal for yourself. 0.86
00:27:52.960 Don't get this little halfway house, 1.00
00:27:55.480 you know, living creature 1.00
00:27:57.260 that both you guys are just using
00:27:59.280 passively, aggressively towards one another.
00:28:03.680 Don't get it because all you're really getting
00:28:06.500 is just a little passive aggressive pet
00:28:08.220 where you guys are just sending it this way
00:28:09.980 and sending it that way.
00:28:11.060 you know just a little paul revere or whatever yeah next and next thing you know it's lashing
00:28:15.720 out you know it's at the parakeet park or whatever at a dog park you know it's biting other things 0.94
00:28:21.000 it's fucking stealing fruit or something over by the um vons or by the um you know it's stealing 0.98
00:28:27.180 fruit over there by the win dixie it's just you don't do it you know it's just you're better than 0.99
00:28:35.820 that you are better than that and this animal deserves better and it'll start thinking if it's
00:28:40.880 if it's his fault you know you'll see sometimes some of these you know these animals these
00:28:45.380 relationship animals and they're out there you'll see them over there i see them off at a 101 at
00:28:50.840 night sometimes you know kicking a can down the side of the interstate you know just
00:28:55.420 just i don't know i think there's just better ways to go about it that's what i would say
00:29:03.940 but anyway i'm really rambling onward 0.89
00:29:06.780 she's going back and sleeping with her ex 0.93
00:29:10.740 and can't even 1.00
00:29:12.400 think of another girl
00:29:14.180 well now you could do this 0.99
00:29:16.880 dude if she's sleeping with her ex you could put 1.00
00:29:18.720 a little listening device a little LD 1.00
00:29:20.880 on that
00:29:22.340 on that animal 1.00
00:29:24.420 so suddenly that little bastard has a 0.99
00:29:28.800 you know a purpose in the world again 1.00
00:29:30.480 cause he's probably feeling
00:29:32.860 like nobody cares about him right now
00:29:34.600 um but anyway man let me quit thinking about that aspect of this and and try and uh listen
00:29:40.780 to more what's going on with you brother onward and i just don't know what to do man it's just
00:29:45.200 hard to get over someone whenever you're first you know just really confused on what to do so
00:29:50.040 if you had any advice that'd be really really appreciated yeah thanks for the call man the
00:29:56.100 suggestion you know i was talking about this last week a little uh that that first love that's that
00:30:01.500 first that's that hot hose hit you know it's like drinking off that hose in the summer
00:30:07.320 you know that house hose that outdoor water spout and it hurts man because that's the crazy thing
00:30:16.620 about a heart a heart really it's like a hand brush it feels you know and your heart just gets
00:30:24.460 so used to just feeling somebody it's almost like they're in there and then when they're gone it's
00:30:31.720 like man there's this piece of your heart that you you just it's not it's not you can't feel
00:30:38.000 them in there anymore that hurts uh the saddest thing is time a lot of it's just going to be time
00:30:44.660 and one joy in it or one thing that's positive is that at least you have that at least you care
00:30:52.700 at least you know that you can care about others you can love others you got that ability to um
00:30:58.460 you got those uh what is it called those pulmonary capabilities
00:31:03.380 because if you if you're the person who your girlfriend leaves you don't give a damn
00:31:08.200 you just start doing construction or whatever and you know people start going missing in your town 0.93
00:31:14.080 then that's different then you are you're violent you're a dark dark angel but that's not you man
00:31:22.300 you know you're somebody that has some feelings and uh and i'm sorry man i'm sorry you're going 0.98
00:31:27.780 through that because yeah it sucks you know my first girlfriend i put i put these motherly 0.97
00:31:32.700 qualities on her and so when she left me or when she when we left me fuck we were children dude 0.97
00:31:38.740 i mean jesus christ it's not like i mean both of us if we actually wanted to leave somewhere 0.63
00:31:42.940 we had to have our parents pick us up but when uh when we when we went our separate ways uh
00:31:50.440 you know i felt i remember i even remember um
00:31:57.460 i remember saying i remember you i was saying you can't leave me you know you are my mom that's
00:32:04.160 what i remember telling her that's crazy that's how bent out i was emotionally
00:32:07.560 you know because i just attached all these feelings that i'd never had a place to really
00:32:13.220 attach them that much i had attached them to this girl and uh and time helps man
00:32:20.700 And don't do anything drastic.
00:32:22.700 Don't do anything crazy.
00:32:24.100 Don't hide on her porch or anything like that. 0.99
00:32:26.860 And don't be out there, you know, by the garbage and looking for shit or, you know, just bypass all of that. 0.99
00:32:35.200 You know, sometimes, dude, sometimes you got to stand on the sidelines and still look like a man, even though you know things have changed. 0.99
00:32:42.700 you know the you know just like drew breeze man the day that the druzik died the day 0.98
00:32:51.540 the druzik died that's that's an old song nobody even knows that shit whatever dude 0.99
00:33:00.240 uh but i'm sorry bro tighten up dude g up don't start masturbating and doing all that don't look 0.99
00:33:07.280 to pornography hold the line you can do it go get a drew breeze jersey and get back out there bucko 0.99
00:33:15.160 because i think you got this but don't put all this pressure on that animal you know don't be
00:33:21.680 over there you know trying to ask the animal you know beating on the aquarium asking what it heard
00:33:27.320 you know was she having guys over and the animal you know he's just like 0.98
00:33:32.460 so just don't whatever kind of animal y'all got a snake or something don't fucking write 0.99
00:33:40.200 dirty messages on the side of the snake and let it loose on her side of the apartment or whatever 1.00
00:33:44.420 you know you know the the world ends tonight she sees that you know sees y'all's pet run by or
00:33:53.240 something with a little sign on its back if you got a little uh you know australian shepherd or
00:33:57.860 whatever just be a man there's a way to be a man and go through this man uh write a country song 0.99
00:34:04.700 listen to country dog get some plug tobacco and drive out in the distance and fucking cry into a 0.96
00:34:09.520 stranger's ditch bro if you want to know what i really did and that's what i did man dude i used 0.98
00:34:17.120 to fucking i remember i would be out there i was working on a farm over there outside of natchez 0.95
00:34:23.200 in Mississippi, and I would, dude, I would get a big plug of tobacco until my whole face 0.99
00:34:27.840 burned, and I had an unnatural reaction, so my face would turn real red when I would 0.99
00:34:35.040 do plug tobacco, and goddamn, I looked like a, I mean, my shit was so fucking red, I looked 0.99
00:34:42.480 like a newborn i look like a damn tall newborn with some overalls on and uh and yeah i would 0.99
00:34:55.440 just do so much fucking tobacco and sometimes i would swallow it i was so angry that me and 0.99
00:35:00.400 this girl had broken up i would swallow a big chunk of it and just vomit off the back of that 0.99
00:35:05.660 tractor so but you can do it man you keep your head up bro i promise you man you're gonna have
00:35:15.060 you know there's gonna be other opportunities for other love around the corner men and different
00:35:20.440 types of love you're gonna love other people differently um but that that first suck off 0.86
00:35:26.420 that nectarine bro that first you know god dang boy especially if you're young bro you know when 0.99
00:35:34.340 And you can be sober and have sex, too, when you're young, bro. 0.99
00:35:37.100 Sober sex is for children. 0.99
00:35:39.560 And I've always said that, dude. 1.00
00:35:40.880 If you see some too sober adults, fucking, bro, that shit is. 1.00
00:35:47.860 I want to throw three or four dollars in a church basket after that because something. 1.00
00:35:54.900 It's just something.
00:35:56.260 It's an awkward.
00:35:58.300 That's a tough deal.
00:36:00.280 That's a par 30 right there, brother.
00:36:02.540 um all right what do we got here actually this call came in man let me throw this
00:36:07.520 in your ear right here here we go hey what up theo this is brett uh from california i'm just
00:36:14.800 calling in because i'm hyped man i just went out on a date i guess you could say with a girl that
00:36:22.100 i went to high school with you know i'm like 26 now so things are a bit different but man this is
00:36:30.380 one of those girls i always looked at you know saw pictures on the internet or whatever it would 0.99
00:36:35.080 just be like way out of my league yeah oh man i remember one time there was this girl nicole was
00:36:43.740 her name and uh dude she liked me one time i found out and i got high and i ate some mushrooms and
00:36:51.520 actually jumped over a fence at a party right when she gave me her number and ripped my hand open
00:36:56.260 ripped uh had to go to the emergency room but um but after that i kind of settled down and i asked
00:37:02.300 her on it to a dance and she went with me and afterwards bruh we're at my buddy's apartment
00:37:09.020 or his house his parents house and he lived down in a lower portion of their house they had a lower
00:37:14.700 portion and he lived there and i was down there with her and she let me you know and she had on 1.00
00:37:22.900 a skirt dude and I got it right up it kind of she was sitting on a pool table and that's not 0.74
00:37:29.040 like a water table it's not like a I don't know people it's like a pool table you know for the
00:37:34.000 game pool with the stick and the balls I'm not thinking of the game of uh it's not like a pool
00:37:38.980 like a swimming pool um yeah it's not like that it's not like a small pool you could eat off of
00:37:45.400 it's like a game and they had it indoors and she's sitting on there dude and she had on these uh
00:37:50.840 well she had on panties bro unders you know and dude and when you're young bro you get your hands 0.65
00:37:57.180 up near a girl's legs bro everything my neck was turning in circles bro my tongue kept just flip
00:38:03.580 flip flopping back and forth over my mouth like a fish on the dock because i was just so nervous
00:38:10.420 dude and i got too nervous to make the move on her and i always regretted that because i've you 1.00
00:38:18.240 know i've hooked up with some real you know some i've hooked up with some some decent looking ladies 0.97
00:38:24.040 and some real you know kind of chicks you might meet by the interstate and uh but damn i never 1.00
00:38:34.160 ever i've never i always regretted that my god and she had these hips boy like these kind of brown 1.00
00:38:42.300 kind of like beige 0.84
00:38:44.840 kind of looked like somebody just kind of
00:38:46.920 cooked her legs and butter a little bit 0.95
00:38:48.780 just beautiful skin tone 1.00
00:38:50.200 god damn she had those buttery 1.00
00:38:52.920 just 1.00
00:38:53.440 fucking hitters boy 1.00
00:38:56.060 and I still think about her 1.00
00:38:58.720 sometimes man I still sometimes close my
00:39:00.840 eyes and just want to 1.00
00:39:01.840 just bite the ass cheeks 1.00
00:39:04.800 off that little beautiful falcon 1.00
00:39:06.800 bro onward 0.85
00:39:07.560 she is way too out of my league 0.98
00:39:09.840 but I
00:39:11.740 I don't know, man.
00:39:14.280 I just shot my shot and took her out today and had the best time ever. 0.63
00:39:18.520 Dang.
00:39:19.300 And now I'm feeling like I should go for it again.
00:39:22.220 But at the same time, I'm a bit pensive because I'm intimidated, I guess, by her attractiveness.
00:39:30.820 And at the same time, I don't know, we get along really well.
00:39:36.200 So I guess I'm tripping.
00:39:38.040 I don't know, man.
00:39:39.440 I'm just calling to see what you think about it.
00:39:41.740 I'm not trying to brag.
00:39:42.960 I'm just trying to get a little input on how I should approach it from here on out.
00:39:47.180 Gang, bro, I like your attitude, man.
00:39:48.860 It doesn't sound like you're trying to brag.
00:39:50.800 So I like that you have that awareness, though, to try and think about that.
00:39:54.760 That's a nice gift.
00:39:55.700 Some people don't have that.
00:39:58.120 You know, I think a lot of it, some of it's going to be out of your control.
00:40:02.780 You can only control what you can control.
00:40:05.120 So how she behaves, there's nothing you can really do to affect that,
00:40:09.600 especially if you're trying to be on the up and up.
00:40:11.740 if you're not trying to trick her or something so a problem i did i mean i can only relate in
00:40:18.620 the ways that i errors that i made i put a woman on a pedestal i'll put her way up here
00:40:23.280 on cloud 60 or whatever and i should have had her on cloud three or whatever by me 0.99
00:40:27.720 so then that way on cloud three i can communicate with her like a you know just like a peer instead
00:40:34.340 of communicating her with her like this you know thing that i had built her up so much in my head
00:40:39.960 that I was afraid to even talk to her.
00:40:42.860 So I would just put her on a level
00:40:43.920 where you can communicate with her, keep her there.
00:40:46.560 And I would be honest,
00:40:49.360 but I would just kind of just take it easy.
00:40:52.640 You know, slow and steady wins the race always.
00:40:55.760 Because what if she's not ready right now today,
00:40:58.480 but then you're laying the groundwork for later.
00:41:01.760 You just don't want to burn the bridge.
00:41:06.600 You know, you don't want to burn the bridge
00:41:08.500 while there's, before somebody puts bacon on it or whatever.
00:41:16.040 You know what I'm saying?
00:41:17.140 So yeah, I would just take it easy, man.
00:41:20.460 If you're not sure if you should do something, don't do it.
00:41:24.160 Talk with a buddy.
00:41:27.260 But take it easy, man.
00:41:29.720 And then, yeah, next time you take her out, do something fun.
00:41:31.940 Do something exciting.
00:41:32.820 Do something that's kind of cool.
00:41:35.280 And be confident about whatever you're going to do.
00:41:37.060 and if she brushes you off or something then that's okay and if she doesn't then that's okay
00:41:43.160 too either way you're good uh we had some calls that came in man i want to i want to i want to
00:41:50.140 buzz a couple of these you know because just the baby we got cam we got will we got the
00:41:55.960 you know we had the magical baby some guy his wife um well let's start right there
00:42:02.660 we had this uh this fella let's listen to a little bit of the call that came in
00:42:08.900 because his wife had a child and they didn't know about it i don't know if you ever heard
00:42:14.300 a surprise baby story but the day after the fourth of july we had a baby boy and we had
00:42:20.000 no idea that was coming she took some tests back in november all came back not pregnant she was
00:42:25.660 having her cycle fourth of july she thought she was constipated all day long i was driving around
00:42:32.020 going to go to a pool party listening to king and the sting and you know she said she thought she
00:42:37.940 was constipated didn't feel good so we were gonna go to the er together and she ended up going home
00:42:43.460 going to sleep so i was waiting to get that call she wanted to go but i never got a call went by
00:42:47.740 her apartment car was gone called the hospital said they were getting uh she was getting transported
00:42:53.740 there and came by her dad was outside waiting for me saying i was gonna be a daddy i remember one 0.85
00:42:59.360 time i was all fucked up i ordered a pizza and didn't know right i forgot so me a little bit 0.90
00:43:05.660 later this person shows up and they're pissed dude because they tried they've been knocking 0.99
00:43:09.460 at the door for like 30 minutes bro so this motherfucker broke a bunch of plant pots on my 0.99
00:43:14.780 porch um and and i mean i got the pizza but you know it was just it was horrible bro i never 0.99
00:43:23.820 i just it was stupid but um anyway they you know you got so anyway yeah sometimes maybe you'll get 0.93
00:43:32.200 an errant pizza you know you get that surprise pie but rarely do you get a human that drops 0.96
00:43:38.920 into your life that you got to care about forever unexpectedly so let's check in with mike right
00:43:46.860 here hello big mike hey what's up man what's up man this is theo vaughn dude how are you today
00:43:55.420 hey good how you doing i'm doing good would you think it was another baby calling
00:44:00.100 no no no not that hopefully not wouldn't that be crazy bro that would be crazy man i don't
00:44:10.040 really know what i would expect after that i was scared it was gonna be twins
00:44:12.820 dude that's so wild man how was uh tell me about the baby i want to know because you guys had that
00:44:20.440 surprise baby you guys weren't expecting it right no we weren't expecting him at all i didn't know
00:44:25.860 he was coming to about three hours before he was born um i mean he's about twice the size he was
00:44:33.220 born now he has two months shots a couple days ago he's almost 12 pounds and he came out about
00:44:40.040 six pounds he was tiny man um could like fit under my forearm he was probably like a week
00:44:46.540 premature oh yeah she only weighs like my wife only weighs well she was my girlfriend at the time 0.95
00:44:51.880 but uh she only weighs about like 130 125 pounds like she's not a big girl man so 1.00
00:44:58.520 um she only gained about maybe eight nine pounds with the baby so i just thought man she was just
00:45:05.040 getting a belly you know what i mean oh yeah dude winter's coming y'all are getting a no eat y'all
00:45:09.800 you know you kind of know each other by now so so i mean i asked my brother and my dad i was like
00:45:16.500 how do i how i tell my girlfriend like you know she's getting she's getting a bit of a belly on
00:45:22.500 and they were like you don't say anything so i didn't i mean i didn't say nothing i was sneaking
00:45:28.060 little hands like hey like i'm going to the gym tonight like you want to you want to come run the
00:45:33.060 elliptical with me or something like or hey like and that's your child the whole time that's the
00:45:39.220 she's getting jacked with your son yeah exactly like i mean a week before he was born we were
00:45:48.900 in ashville and we were went on a three mile hike in the mountains and yeah dang this almost
00:45:59.020 sounds biblical now baby you're getting out there into the hills dude i was just i was just glad he
00:46:04.960 wasn't born at that time and you didn't know you didn't know we had no idea man i mean her stomach
00:46:12.640 was hard you know but like i just we'd be cuddling at night and stuff and i'd have my hand around i
00:46:18.620 mean nothing ever kicked i mean she was getting her period every month still like she took a
00:46:24.460 couple tests back in november and they all came back like not pregnant she would get sick every
00:46:29.920 You know, man, we'd go to like, I mean, we'd go out, you know, like I'm 24, she's 23.
00:46:34.940 Yeah, so you guys went out to the bars and everything, huh?
00:46:37.300 Yeah, we'd go out to like the bars.
00:46:38.960 Hey, man, dude, I want to meet this baby, bro. 0.99
00:46:41.300 This baby likes to fucking go ham, son. 0.99
00:46:43.780 I like it. 1.00
00:46:45.660 He's done some shit. 1.00
00:46:46.760 She's only 130 pounds? 1.00
00:46:48.700 Because honestly, bro, I think everybody thought she was fat. 0.73
00:46:52.720 No, man, because like even my grandmother. 0.96
00:46:54.320 Because how do you get a sneaky baby?
00:46:55.800 You know what I'm saying? 0.78
00:46:56.440 Look, we've all, we all got fat, man. 1.00
00:46:58.080 And I got a huge, my ass has two big, you know, I have huge ass. 1.00
00:47:02.620 But, yeah, I can't believe, I mean, that's what, you know, in everybody's mind, 1.00
00:47:07.580 you think of a larger lady not knowing that they got that baby in them.
00:47:13.220 No, exactly, man. 0.98
00:47:14.060 She's not a big girl. 1.00
00:47:15.680 She's a tiny woman. 1.00
00:47:17.540 How do you hide a baby in a tiny woman, dude? 0.99
00:47:19.760 This is almost like, you know, Siegfried and Roy or something. 0.99
00:47:24.040 nice yes she has uh she has something called endometriosis and what the doctors think is
00:47:32.740 um she would bleed sometimes and they think that he was hiding in the fallopian tube yeah
00:47:39.640 yeah he was like in some like hiding under a cyst or something in her stomach so that's why
00:47:45.980 like her stomach didn't grow out really bro he's a real snake this little limb after huh
00:47:52.200 now he is man he is and they had about they had about 12 15 nurses in the way in like the
00:48:00.340 the birthing room with us because they didn't know what was gonna happen man nobody knew
00:48:04.420 what was gonna happen i mean all they could tell us was that he has a heart like he has a heartbeat
00:48:09.420 i didn't even know he was a boy until he came out wow i was just that whole two hours man i'll be
00:48:15.320 honest with you i was just freaking out on how he would come out like healthy wise yeah i bet i can
00:48:20.940 only imagine at that point you're like Jesus so you went from not even knowing you were having a
00:48:24.800 baby to by that night you were a father yes sir I uh he was born at one the morning on July 5th 0.98
00:48:35.160 so he was almost a fourth of July baby but he uh he waited about an hour damn man jeepers dude yeah 0.95
00:48:45.340 it sounds like he was getting caught up into something he's hiding out in his mom he's showing 0.64
00:48:49.560 up right at you know after midnight on the fourth of july it sounds like he's really looking for
00:48:56.900 trouble no exactly exactly exactly and what's his name now did you guys give him a name or what is
00:49:04.760 it yeah his name is uh monroe emerson bayhue he's named after uh he's actually not really named that
00:49:12.080 for anybody man we have a little tradition in my family with guys we do an m the first name e for
00:49:17.500 the middle name and like an hour before he was born we were just writing down ideas on a white
00:49:22.900 board and some of the nurses were helping us out we just crossed off the ones that she liked and
00:49:26.880 the next day when a little pregnancy brain was gone we just kind of just picked the one she
00:49:31.500 liked and that's the one she liked the most wow monroe so so y'all didn't have a um y'all didn't
00:49:38.520 have a like a crib or anything at home for him bro we had we had nothing bro jesus christ
00:49:45.620 we didn't even have a car seat to leave with man they had they made us go we had to get a car seat 0.55
00:49:53.240 because he was a premature baby yeah premature nation bro shout out to all the prematures too
00:49:58.180 dude those people don't get any respect man gang gang nick said exactly exactly he uh they had to
00:50:05.700 do a car seat test they had to take him for a couple hours uh ride around a car with him make 0.93
00:50:10.520 sure his heart rate wouldn't go up or anything damn that's like when the police when you go ride 0.58
00:50:14.560 with the police or whatever and see him get uh get people exactly exactly so he's just wading
00:50:21.040 into the world and how's he doing now he's doing good man he's completely healthy he's got a big 0.92
00:50:26.900 ass head um he's got in that high percentile head got a little little chubby but i mean he was small 0.71
00:50:33.180 man but like they say he's perfectly healthy now amen um he got all his shots a couple of days ago 0.64
00:50:39.140 he's up to up to speed and all that and um he's just we're just kind of hanging out right now
00:50:46.460 until uh i'm trying to i'm in construction it's like i'm trying to build our own little starter
00:50:51.240 home right now so i'm trying to do something like that and we're just kind of living in between
00:50:54.840 places but wow yeah dude good well i see what you're why i mean i don't i just wonder if you
00:51:01.340 what else you what's your wife's next big reveal you know yeah hopefully nothing wild man i don't
00:51:07.840 she needs to calm down with those for a little while 0.99
00:51:10.380 dude you might want to get her 1.00
00:51:11.520 a breathalyzer or something 1.00
00:51:14.120 see if she's going to have another one 1.00
00:51:16.660 or not breathalyzer but 0.95
00:51:17.640 what's that thing where they hook you up
00:51:20.700 and see if you're telling the truth
00:51:22.100 a polygram 1.00
00:51:25.760 yeah get her that polygram dude 1.00
00:51:27.540 you know what I'm saying bro
00:51:28.660 no yeah I need to get her one of those 0.99
00:51:31.400 bro you weren't like laying there 0.79
00:51:33.220 you weren't ever laying there
00:51:34.840 and felt the baby kick or anything 0.99
00:51:36.600 he never kicked at all man i mean we hang we hang out every single day man uh damn is he a 0.73
00:51:42.740 mine bro this just sounds so wild i don't know man and i have pictures like we went to this gala
00:51:49.280 in wilmington um for this big festival thing back the beginning of may so at this point she
00:51:55.840 was probably like seven months and we have pictures like of her and me and i mean you
00:52:01.660 just can't even tell man um i had a lot of pictures i mean i got that picture the night
00:52:06.920 before we went um hiking we were out in nashville and she had this tight little dress on me
00:52:12.300 real real big but i mean i just thought that i was you know you know i was gonna have a good 1.00
00:52:18.760 night you know i didn't think that i didn't think that they were just bigger than usual them tits 0.95
00:52:24.300 yeah and what about were y'all doing drugs or anything like that because that seems like it'd 0.59
00:52:28.660 be wild i mean i guess i can i can i can kind of talk about this now i guess because like we we
00:52:33.900 were truthful to the social workers and everybody at what we were doing during the pregnancy because
00:52:38.820 we had no idea but i mean yeah we did we did a drug i mean the week before we were in the 0.87
00:52:43.340 mountains we did a little little stuff hell yeah boy i'll fucking do something if i had it bro but 0.64
00:52:48.380 i can't do it but i want some you know i'm saying and ever since i haven't done any since man i want 0.99
00:52:54.900 to fucking get some bro but i can't but whatever dog we ain't thinking about that dog but damn 0.96
00:53:01.020 bro that's what i'm saying you guys might have that new way to do birthing that you know just 0.99
00:53:06.780 kind of let it do its thing you do your thing and then y'all meet up when it's time you know for the
00:53:11.180 baby to show out in the world exactly man i think it all worked out in its own because we weren't
00:53:17.280 together when we conceived him i mean we were talking and stuff like that and i felt like we
00:53:22.440 knew that she was pregnant we probably would have had to force ourselves to be together and
00:53:27.800 everything wow i think it all it all just kind of worked itself out in a way and then i mean a
00:53:34.440 couple weeks after he was conceived i was in a pretty pretty bad car accident um crushed up
00:53:41.280 truck and then i mean i didn't know why i was still walking around but i guess i mean he you
00:53:46.500 know eight months later i kind of figured out why i was walking around you know what i mean
00:53:50.140 amen bro yeah that's cool dude damn and so it sounds like yeah you sound like you're in good
00:53:54.980 spirits now so things are kind of uh cruising along pretty good yeah man it's cruising along 0.96
00:53:59.760 pretty good kind of gives me like a like a self-urgency kind of thing makes me a little bit
00:54:04.620 get going a little more at work trying to get stuff done uh yeah i like that even if i'm having
00:54:10.640 a bad day i know i'm gonna come home to them and kind of gets me going again that's exciting huh
00:54:18.120 it is exciting man it's just like a it's just a family that i didn't expect to get so soon but i
00:54:25.380 got it and i'm happy man wow that's crazy man wow bro what a crazy story man i know it's pretty
00:54:35.040 wild man her uncle uh he's he's in filming and stuff and we went up to ohio the other weekend
00:54:40.540 he did this uh little production video stuff with us and um he's trying to send it into the tlc
00:54:47.160 right now when he gets it all edited out for that tv show and oh interesting yeah i mean yeah i guess
00:54:54.100 i guess there's people having surprised children out there yeah and that's the thing too man like
00:54:58.660 if i was watching that show before i don't think these people are lying how do you not know how do 0.99
00:55:03.640 you not know that your your wife or whatever is pregnant but man it's people don't bullshit man 1.00
00:55:09.740 it's just the real stuff i guess and bitches be hiding shit man let's be honest dude you know 1.00
00:55:14.960 what I'm saying bro I saw a chart the other day it says six out of 11 bitches be keeping secrets 1.00
00:55:20.780 so I mean you know it could happen in hindsight if would you is there any warning signs you would 1.00
00:55:28.720 give to fathers who who who may not realize they're about to be a father something that
00:55:34.060 they can look like looking back is there any way a guy could tell maybe that his wife is pregnant
00:55:39.620 maybe anything you should look out for i don't know man it's hard i mean i guess if she like
00:55:45.580 because she would get sick sometimes if you see your girlfriend or your wife sporadically throwing
00:55:50.920 up randomly think have it in the back of your mind because i mean she would never even have 0.96
00:55:55.300 food urges man like i think that thing that whole thing is a myth too like if someone thinks that 0.99
00:56:00.800 they're pregnant they feel like they can eat just whatever they want because there would never be a 1.00
00:56:04.380 time there was never a time where she would be like hey let's go get this to eat or hey let's 1.00
00:56:09.500 go get to see it was just a regular eating schedule i mean she was even on a keto diet 0.97
00:56:13.200 bro like there were days where she wouldn't eat till three or four in the fucking afternoon 1.00
00:56:17.320 dude this baby sounds amazing bro drugs keto this baby could probably pledge a frat bro 0.99
00:56:25.780 probably probably he get in
00:56:30.220 dude that's amazing man monroe brother yeah it's wild man
00:56:38.940 that's a wild story well uh well dude is it cool if we check in every now and then on this baby
00:56:44.660 dude because this thing i i don't know what he might do next you know no exactly that's what we
00:56:52.000 got a kick out of when you said he'd be a secret agent man because like that's exactly what he
00:56:56.780 would probably be just not even making noise come up behind somebody and crack their neck 0.93
00:57:01.400 i'm like is he a mime how do you stay still for nine months bro you know 1.00
00:57:08.480 yeah i know man he's definitely not quiet now man a little fucker can cry i tell you 0.99
00:57:13.020 once he got out he let us know he was around wow man well look this is an exciting story because 0.98
00:57:20.020 for me it just may it reminds me that there's possibility in the world and that anything can
00:57:24.620 kind of happen in that you know that uh just that thing you know just that that that things can
00:57:30.600 occur sometimes we get so stagnant thinking that nothing you know there might not be any magic left
00:57:36.080 in the world but it's definitely it sounds about as almost mystical as you could get
00:57:40.560 it is man because i mean with her like endometriosis and some stuff and
00:57:45.220 her family genes i mean she didn't think that she'd be having really any kids anytime soon
00:57:50.160 and then my history man i mean i got a bad history with like drugs and um shit like that so i mean i
00:57:56.460 didn't really think i could produce like that you know what i mean and i guess i mean she was on that 0.99
00:58:03.260 strong ass birth control man damn they're shooting your arm and jesus bro swimmers dog 0.99
00:58:09.420 i don't know man i mean so that's what i mean it is that's like the shit they got at the zoo 1.00
00:58:15.700 bro that's that strong strand man yeah exactly damn boy well dang dude you guys are really 0.98
00:58:23.780 i can't wait to see what y'all do next man man i mean y'all can call whenever you want man i've 0.98
00:58:29.480 He's got my phone on me.
00:58:31.220 He's going to know something.
00:58:32.700 Okay, we will, man.
00:58:33.560 We'll check in with the baby.
00:58:34.600 Will you send Nick a picture so we have just an image we can put up of Monroe?
00:58:40.060 Yeah, man.
00:58:41.000 We actually do these little family portrait things at my mom's last week.
00:58:45.720 I can send a picture of him or all of us, whatever y'all want.
00:58:48.640 Yeah, that'd be cool, man.
00:58:49.620 Is your mother excited about having a grandchild?
00:58:52.360 Oh, yeah, man.
00:58:53.040 Yeah, it's her first grandchild.
00:58:55.640 So, you know, she's all over the place.
00:58:57.680 cool man well it sounds like you guys almost got force-fed kind of like a new beginning in a weird
00:59:03.500 way exactly exactly yeah well i hope you make the most of it man and uh congratulations on your son
00:59:11.160 all right i appreciate it man thanks for calling yeah you bet bro we'll talk to you soon man and
00:59:16.240 tell that secret agent i said to keep it low key you know exactly i got you i got all right take
00:59:22.820 care brother all right man you guys can talk to you peace wow i can't i mean i've waited for you
00:59:29.760 know i've had things show up i didn't expect you know we got that all that plastic wrap come at
00:59:34.900 one time but man imagine you tickling your girlfriend and then you got a child that's i
00:59:44.000 mean you know imagine just anything y'all go you know you have a couple of ham you know a couple
00:59:49.920 ham steaks or whatever and then bam you know you got a child or anything you watching a movie an 0.99
00:59:59.400 hour later you got a fucking child bro i mean it never stops they got that magic baby out there 0.99
01:00:05.320 so 1.00
01:00:07.120 possibility possibility
01:00:15.200 you know there is there's always there's something around the corner
01:00:20.320 sometimes you just got to hold the line and get there
01:00:23.700 and to the gentleman that called before him the uh you know there's
01:00:31.520 there just could be something great that's right around the corner
01:00:35.960 but even if whatever's right around the corner isn't
01:00:39.720 if even though even if it's not perfect or it's not
01:00:44.440 the best or what you've been wishing for praying for it's going to be there's going to be something
01:00:52.140 else there's going to be someone else there's going to be another opportunity i think it's
01:01:00.740 only opportunity that's right around the bend usually you know if you're if you're keeping
01:01:06.240 your head up and your eyes forward and your heart open i think it's only opportunity uh
01:01:12.740 uh that's around the corner for you um so i think that uh you know we got somebody's fine
01:01:22.720 you know right there a guy you know a woman he thought it's out of his league and suddenly
01:01:26.260 they're playing you know they playing t-ball together there you go all right i want to make
01:01:31.800 a call right now to uh cam and he you guys remember his call um was this i got a problem
01:01:40.700 with these sweaty hands man my dad have problems with it tells me not to worry about it but
01:01:46.560 comes a problem on dates man and uh oh you got them sweaty hands huh you got them leaky mitts
01:01:52.740 baby tell me more just wondering some advice that maybe you could give a young guy sweaty hands
01:01:58.240 trying to figure out this world man so oh you got that drip shake huh i can only imagine man you
01:02:04.780 try to shake somebody's hand and you and your daddy probably can't even handshake because it's
01:02:08.880 It's just like two fists trying to hug, and they can't.
01:02:16.280 It's like, hmm.
01:02:18.700 All right, and I want to make a call to my boy Cam now.
01:02:24.120 You know, your boy had that drool hand, Luke, really,
01:02:26.480 and I wanted to check in with him
01:02:30.000 because a lot of great suggestions came in for him from different listeners.
01:02:34.900 Yeah, you guys remember Cam?
01:02:36.000 He and his father both had the same situation where they get extra water on their hands.
01:02:43.580 So they could, you know, definitely a liability probably if you, you know, maybe playing certain board games or things like that.
01:02:51.740 But also a unique, you know, that's a unique when you have a special. 0.89
01:02:56.860 I mean, shit, if God comes looking for an actual Aquaman, then, you know, they're going to have they're going to be right there at the front of the line. 0.98
01:03:04.400 where my dry ass is going to be back there at the back uh but let's uh let's put a buzz into him 0.99
01:03:11.340 right now hello big cam what's up man what's up playboys theo how you doing bro i'm doing okay 0.99
01:03:22.320 man you know i'm getting through uh you know me dude i've always got something wrong with me 0.99
01:03:27.100 dude always man but it's fucking you because everybody else has something wrong with them man 0.96
01:03:32.640 so it's okay man thank you bro i think i needed to hear that today man and i appreciate you 0.99
01:03:39.560 calling in too about uh about the hyperhidrosis man you got those drippy mitts dude i want to 0.98
01:03:44.820 know more about it yeah man uh i've actually done a lot better since i saw that shit man 0.94
01:03:50.880 so i showed it to my dad he thought it's fucking hilarious i appreciate that good and uh i had a 0.94
01:03:58.660 few people at work tell me to get like a shirt that said drippy mitts on it and i was like
01:04:02.980 i don't know bro yeah i don't know if you need that i don't even know if that was the best uh
01:04:08.180 nickname either man so nah dude but it was pretty fucking funny man like i really appreciate you 0.86
01:04:14.180 even having me on man you know shit yeah well it's interesting dude because i was thinking 0.96
01:04:18.860 whenever you were talking about that i was thinking about it a couple days after and i was 0.96
01:04:23.000 like because i've always thought you know my hands look up look like my mother's hands so i always
01:04:28.440 thought i had a woman's hands so i remember someone's hands yeah man so when i was young i
01:04:33.620 would tell if i held a girl's hand i would always remember i've forgotten about this i would say
01:04:37.940 uh you know i would say i'm not a woman i would always tell a girl that if i held her hand or
01:04:43.180 something for some and i'm sure they they were thinking like well what in the hell is this guy
01:04:46.340 talking about but yeah dude you might as well just not even say anything bro jesus yeah dude
01:04:53.600 yeah i had it back good god yeah definitely might as well not even say anything but
01:04:59.080 unfortunately i said some stuff but uh but yeah i think everybody has just like something that they
01:05:07.260 feel like uncomfortable about but i guess with your hands it would be because that's like the
01:05:12.260 first thing you reach out to somebody with sometimes well yeah man i was talking to a dude 0.97
01:05:16.860 today got a good first impression you know we were talking about some shit and then he goes to shake 0.99
01:05:22.660 my hand dab me up or whatever and i had to wipe my hand off real quick he didn't fucking care man 0.99
01:05:28.520 like the fuck so i mean some people care about it and like when they do care it's it's like whatever 0.99
01:05:34.400 bro like fuck off so well it's funny because it makes me think because sometimes somebody will 1.00
01:05:39.520 shake my hand and their hand will be if it's cold and wet then that's when i guess i get a little 1.00
01:05:45.720 bit alarmed maybe um because i'm like is this person like a living are they gonna live long
01:05:51.660 or what's gonna happen yeah but if it's just kind of damp usually i think oh maybe they're just kind
01:05:57.320 of nerves you know nervous is it is it nerves that kick-started or what do you notice yeah man
01:06:03.760 i mean i have pretty bad anxiety problems or i think i do but like everybody else says they 0.98
01:06:09.440 don't notice it and like i'm fine but like like shit i guess it's all in my head like you were 0.84
01:06:14.120 talking about like getting out of your head just the other day and like i mean it's just all in my 0.99
01:06:19.480 fucking head man so like the more i think about it the worse it gets so like so like if i'm thinking 0.99
01:06:24.440 about oh man like gotta get my hands dry so you know my hand on this girl's shoulder or whatever 1.00
01:06:30.080 it's like well man you keep fucking thinking about it so it's not gonna happen man like 0.82
01:06:35.520 so it's just like an ongoing game in your head you know and then once i get working out man it's 0.99
01:06:42.220 like fuck it's gone because i'm working out and like i'm thinking about like the other task ahead 0.98
01:06:47.580 instead of my fucking hand sweat so yeah yeah man i feel you with my hair i start to think my hair 1.00
01:06:53.380 is losing out and then i start looking at it all the time then i start losing bro you got fucking 0.97
01:06:57.520 killer hair man okay well don't let anybody tell you different i appreciate it man i uh thanks 0.99
01:07:03.860 dude yeah i just fuck but yeah it's crazy how we just get so stuck in our heads man um 0.98
01:07:09.000 what really is what were some of the things i know some people suggested botox and people suggested 0.99
01:07:14.540 that ion ion ion to derma okay so i actually looked into the ion to derma and i'm actually
01:07:21.140 probably gonna invest in that eventually but i went to the doctor and he gave me like two solutions
01:07:28.000 he gave me like he said i could put like this little rub on my hands that like makes them stay
01:07:32.020 dry or i could take this uh little cap or this little pill like say i were to go out it's supposed
01:07:38.840 to like dry me out a little bit you know so yeah like i had a date and then like i could take that
01:07:43.700 before i've tried it like it works pretty well like it's trying like i can feel it literally 1.00
01:07:48.180 like sucking the damn like moisture out of me man like my fucking mouth gets all dry and shit 0.99
01:07:54.420 i'm just like fuck but like i don't know if that'd be more of a problem or what yeah it works dude so 1.00
01:08:02.040 hey that could be more of a problem dude you might be that dry daddy you know yeah man be 0.99
01:08:08.020 careful what you wish for you know i know it's so true bro um so what did the eye ontoderma what is 0.83
01:08:14.420 it dude i don't even fucking know like i looked into it it's i think it's like some sort of like 0.96
01:08:22.080 electrical shit i don't know how there can be a like electrical shit in water i mean 0.99
01:08:27.560 i don't fucking know without killing yourself so maybe you're just killing like something inside 1.00
01:08:33.840 of you man and it just like makes your hands i don't fucking know dude it's dark arts bro it 0.99
01:08:39.640 sounds like yeah man it sounds like very dark arts and it sounds like you'd have to be like 0.80
01:08:44.600 past 10 o'clock at night for you to be able to do it at least yeah it seems a little sketchy man 0.91
01:08:49.360 i don't know about all that i definitely ain't getting no fucking botox yeah i don't want to be 0.96
01:08:54.920 a freak man i'll start leaking from my face like you're gonna sweat from other places if you prevent 0.97
01:09:00.680 that so like i don't want to start sweating fucking from some crazy place on my body that 0.99
01:09:06.440 you normally don't sweat from then you really got a problem so 0.98
01:09:10.960 yeah that's true man you don't yeah that'd be crazy if you just started kind of like just
01:09:16.940 dripping off your earlobes all the time or something yeah dude or like say you had like 0.99
01:09:21.760 a fucking mustache or something and it's like dripping off your mustache and shit i mean i'm 0.99
01:09:26.200 too young to even be able to grow my facial hair or my facial hair out yet but i mean yeah it could 0.99
01:09:31.540 be a problem man so cam dude i love your attitude man thanks for the good words and uh
01:09:36.000 and and yeah man i just appreciate you like just kind of even just like made me making me think
01:09:40.840 about what that's like so if i shake somebody's hand and their hand is a little damp like in the
01:09:44.760 future at least i know hey man maybe this maybe they have this and then i can discuss it with
01:09:49.160 them you know yeah man just feel for him you know like you say you don't like your nose man well 0.98
01:09:54.620 like what if you had that fucking nose on your hand or something like so yeah i mean yeah what 0.97
01:10:01.860 if every time i just yeah yeah everybody's got that thing man it's true bro and it's funny 0.99
01:10:07.860 because the thing is i bet if we traded and had somebody else's i wonder if we would be like 0.99
01:10:12.880 relieved or if we'd be like fuck man i want my old thing back shit man i wish we could man i could 1.00
01:10:18.400 get your nose for a fucking day you take my sweaty hands man see how it works oh dude i would moon 1.00
01:10:22.920 walk on my hands that's the first thing i would fucking do what the fuck yeah right you could 1.00
01:10:28.580 easily do that oh shit i mean i guess i mean if you know how to do a handstand long enough 0.99
01:10:36.560 well dude uh thanks for calling in dude and um yeah uh we'll be in touch man we'll reach out and 0.99
01:10:42.120 say hey sometime oh yeah bro it's good to talk to you man i'm definitely gonna come to a fucking 0.80
01:10:47.760 show soon yeah where do you live at charlotte so oh nice i live in north carolina so like so yeah 0.93
01:10:55.320 maybe before if you hear that i'm coming man reach out or something and we'll get you some
01:10:58.280 tickets dude hell yeah dude me and my dad will come through oh yeah that would be great you 0.99
01:11:04.060 could shake the droopy mitts man fuck yeah boy let's double down dude hell yeah let's double 0.99
01:11:10.460 down um all right bro have a good day man i'll talk to you soon great to talk to you man love 1.00
01:11:16.120 you take it easy man all right you too cam gang bro peace man you gotta love that you gotta love
01:11:22.620 his energy right there um let's take a call that uh came in right here onward hey theo this is
01:11:28.540 chris from wisconsin what's up chris from wi and green bay really had that showing out they showed
01:11:34.640 out yesterday onward uh i just wanted to call and uh let you know that uh your your podcast has
01:11:43.080 really helped out quite a bit man uh about two years ago my wife went through a hemorrhage after
01:11:49.120 we had our our baby girl and oh man sorry to hear that brother thanks for uh thanks for sharing that
01:11:55.300 more uh it's pretty serious you could you could pass away after that so uh anyway oh yeah it's
01:12:04.020 serious man i mean hell dude other guys girl they're out there doing drugs or something the
01:12:09.320 baby's i mean the baby's not trying to get out so that's really you know if you're doing drugs
01:12:16.960 and a baby's trying to get out of your body, 0.98
01:12:18.540 that's almost like a damn episode of CSI SUV or whatever. 0.99
01:12:24.060 But Onward? 0.99
01:12:25.060 It set my mind in a spiral
01:12:26.880 when she had to get taken away by ambulance and stuff.
01:12:30.620 And I thought that, man,
01:12:33.140 I'm going to have to raise these two kids solo
01:12:35.500 and be without my partner, my love, everything.
01:12:41.960 Wow.
01:12:43.680 Yeah, sorry to have joked around, man.
01:12:45.320 That's a real deal right there.
01:12:47.780 I can't imagine that. 1.00
01:12:50.440 You know, that you brought your lady rolling off there in that little hope wagon.
01:12:55.700 That's all the ambulance is, bro.
01:12:58.940 And that you're not sure what your future is going to look like, you know.
01:13:04.340 All these things flashing through your head.
01:13:06.240 Onward.
01:13:07.260 It's not my mind going, man.
01:13:09.060 And I went into a pretty messed up place for actually about two years.
01:13:14.380 And it was right around when I started listening to your podcast, man.
01:13:17.840 And I just wanted to let you know, just hearing, you know, it might not be the same thing,
01:13:22.320 but, you know, other people are going through stuff, too, and yourself and all that.
01:13:26.980 And, yeah, man, it's just, you know, just kind of listening, man.
01:13:31.540 It helped a lot.
01:13:34.000 And I'm happy to say, like, two years after that, my head is great, my family's great, my wife's great.
01:13:41.140 um you know i hope you're taking care of yourself man but your podcast has done a lot to help dude
01:13:46.940 i i appreciate it we look forward to coming back to milwaukee gang gang gang gang man thanks for
01:13:53.380 that call uh yeah i will be i'll be in milwaukee soon um but um yeah man it's just it's so crazy
01:14:02.260 how it will change it all changes that's it's going to happen so if somebody's broken your
01:14:07.660 heart or if somebody's done this or if somebody's done that you know or if you fell in love or you
01:14:12.980 fell out of love or you fell into a job or you decided not to take a job like me you know if you
01:14:19.300 are don't know if you're making the right choice or not making the right choice um whatever you're
01:14:25.800 feeling right now it's going to change if it's bad it's that it's going to change and even if
01:14:31.220 it's good it's going to change you know i get sometimes hooked on i think you know i have such
01:14:36.900 a short-term memory emotionally so that's why i make a lot of the same mistakes sometimes because
01:14:42.900 uh my emotions they just don't remember what what's just occurred you know and so i'll just
01:14:50.260 it's just i got short-term memory you know and that's why i'm like oh well how did i find myself
01:14:57.420 here again. It's because I just, I don't know. It just, you know, it forgets. Your feelings
01:15:08.800 forget. But then maybe that's one of the beautiful things about them too, man. If your feelings
01:15:15.160 remembered all the hurt all the time, oh, you know. I mean, sometimes they remember
01:15:25.380 enough of it but if that's all they remembered that would just be we really wouldn't be a very
01:15:29.980 unique creature man we really wouldn't be a special creature um yeah we relate we relate we relate
01:15:39.740 and we forget how how much we can relate to one another don't we we forget that
01:15:47.420 yeah man when i saw just everybody's man everybody's got something everybody's going
01:15:57.640 through something and that's the that's what that's where we're the same
01:16:03.080 you know that's where we're the same and and through each other we can find you know a little
01:16:09.460 bit of opportunity to to feel better i think a lot of times if we're not feeling good
01:16:15.120 but we get through it we keep going onward we keep going onward that's it
01:16:23.200 you know you get up and you dust your feet off or your legs off or something if you
01:16:29.340 if you got dust on your legs and or whatever wherever you got dust and you just we you know
01:16:38.600 we live to fight another day
01:16:40.320 we live to fight another day
01:16:44.520 whether we're fighting with our heart
01:16:45.960 or with our head
01:16:46.720 or with our hands
01:16:47.740 you know
01:16:51.760 we live to learn another day
01:16:55.340 you know
01:17:00.260 when we brush ourselves off
01:17:01.560 and we put ourselves back out there
01:17:03.060 in the store window
01:17:04.240 because somebody might see us
01:17:08.120 or we might see somebody you know we might be able to be an inspiration for someone
01:17:14.020 or somebody might be able to be an inspiration for us we just we stay in there we stay in the
01:17:18.680 we stay in the mosh pit we stay in the mosh pit man and we keep going on we're bro that's what it
01:17:25.040 is so anyway um what else is going on with me i don't know i just appreciate all the calls man
01:17:34.660 And a lot of really just people calling in with what's going on.
01:17:38.360 And a lot of people being really real about what's happening in our lives.
01:17:42.540 And it makes me feel connected to people, man.
01:17:44.720 It really does.
01:17:46.340 It makes me feel a little more human than when I sat down in this chair today.
01:17:55.920 I mean, anything's possible.
01:17:58.800 Anything's possible.
01:18:00.500 You could start turning into Aquaman.
01:18:02.160 Man, you could have a kid pop out of a chick you know and just say it's yours.
01:18:07.140 You know what I'm saying?
01:18:07.920 It's crazy.
01:18:08.560 Anything is possible.
01:18:11.340 There's a lot of unique things.
01:18:14.060 There's a lot of opportunity.
01:18:17.380 You've got to get up.
01:18:19.180 You've got to do it.
01:18:20.080 I'm going to do it, man.
01:18:21.960 I'm going to keep going, bro.
01:18:25.400 Anyway, sorry if this got a little down and dour.
01:18:27.580 I don't know.
01:18:29.380 But whatever, bro.
01:18:30.440 I'm also not sorry, dude. 0.80
01:18:31.880 I don't even know who I am sometimes, but I'm going to fucking keep trying to figure it out, boy.
01:18:38.880 Let's take a song right here, man. 0.94
01:18:42.020 Let's get us out of here.
01:18:47.620 And we got it.
01:18:51.740 We got it.
01:18:53.240 You guys be good to yourselves, man.
01:18:54.520 You deserve it, brother and sisters.
01:18:57.520 Gang, gang.
01:18:58.260 here's Bishop Gunn
01:19:01.520 Anything You Want
01:19:02.360 Anything you want, man
01:19:32.360 I got to get some more types of music, huh?
01:20:02.360 If you'll just give me what I need
01:20:08.100 You can have anything you want
01:20:13.640 Thank you guys for your support, man.
01:20:27.020 That means a lot.
01:20:32.360 Just doing my best, man.
01:20:37.860 We're doing our best, you know.
01:21:02.360 You guys take care of yourselves, man, gang.
01:21:32.360 ladies and gentlemen i'm jonathan kite and welcome to kite club a podcast where i'll be
01:21:41.580 sharing thoughts on things like current events stand-up stories and seven ways to pleasure your
01:21:46.720 partner the answer may shock you sometimes i'll interview my friends sometimes i won't
01:21:52.380 and as always i'll be joined by the voices in my head you have three new voice messages
01:21:58.800 A lot of people are talking about Kite Club.
01:22:02.040 I've been talking about Kite Club for so long.
01:22:04.700 Longer than anybody else.
01:22:06.380 So great.
01:22:07.720 Aye, sweetheart.
01:22:09.360 Here's a deal. 1.00
01:22:10.700 Anyone who doesn't listen to Kite Club is a dodgy bloody wanker. 1.00
01:22:14.620 Jermaine. 0.99
01:22:15.900 Ho ho, I'll take a quarter pounder with cheese and a McFlurry.
01:22:19.700 Sorry, sir, but our ice cream machine is broken.
01:22:21.780 Ho ho ho!
01:22:23.060 No!
01:22:24.040 I think Tom Hanks just butt dialed me.
01:22:26.320 Anyway, first rule of Kite Club is, tell everyone about Kite Club.
01:22:30.640 Second rule of Kite Club is, tell everyone about Kite Club.
01:22:34.900 Third rule, like and subscribe wherever you listen to podcasts, or watch us on YouTube, yeah?
01:22:40.620 And yes, don't worry, my Brad Pitt impression will get better.
01:22:44.560 Recently, our company softball team lost the big game by one run.
01:22:48.860 Then Dale tried to console us with the quote, winning isn't everything.
01:22:52.760 Well, Dale and I are very different.
01:22:56.860 I get early payout from Bet365.
01:22:58.800 If my team goes up big, I get paid out instantly,
01:23:01.600 even if they blow the lead later.
01:23:03.620 Sound familiar, Dale?
01:23:05.420 Thanks, Bet365.
01:23:07.020 Must be 19 or older Ontario only.
01:23:08.560 Please play responsibly.
01:23:09.380 If you have questions or concerns about your gambling
01:23:10.800 or the gambling of someone close to you,
01:23:11.880 please go to connexontario.ca TNC Supply.