Tower Gang - Ep 130 - He's Just Like Me

00:00:00.000 toad why what's up retards i'm trying to start a cult here baby so i can only fit a third of my 1.00

00:00:08.100 dick into toads mussy you want to kill me or you want to give me a bone i don't know 1.00

00:00:14.640 when i say fuck the jews it means i'm horny 1.00

00:00:17.680 woe is me i'm retarded any of you guys ever had the mythical where they put the whole thing in 1.00

00:00:23.340 and then do that shit with it the three of you had a threesome of some kind i was watching it and 0.99

00:00:30.520 jerking off 1.00

00:00:31.380 he was a 10 in real life she's like a dead 8

00:00:39.400 lewis you're like a brother to me donald trump come on tower gang that is the most offensive podcast 1.00

00:00:47.540 fat dave fuck you man 1.00

00:00:49.500 it's not what the show is about this shit is retarded 1.00

00:00:57.620 oh my god i love this show so fucking much it's wednesday night you know what that means 1.00

00:01:06.160 bitch it's toad time toads up this motherfucking presidential candidate 2024 make sure you get 1.00

00:01:11.740 your votes in early we're mailing in ballots we don't give a fuck about election interference it 1.00

00:01:16.120 is toad all in all the time play his track let's go 1.00

00:01:19.980 fuck yeah 1.00

00:01:20.500 she doesn't know who i am 1.00

00:01:23.920 she doesn't give a damn about me 0.98

00:01:30.320 cause i'm just a teenage dirtbag baby 0.99

00:01:35.240 yeah i'm just a teenage dirtbag baby 1.00

00:01:40.240 god i want to fuck that guy you know what i'm saying 1.00

00:01:51.880 i mean vote for it i meant vote for it 1.00

00:01:53.720 dude that tint is as wide as that song

00:01:56.120 dude outstanding stage presence obviously i have no idea how that guy is a virgin in any way

00:02:02.600 it's mystifying honestly i'm not gonna lie i'm a little bit hard that was

00:02:07.120 man we came in i was ironically impressed

00:02:09.860 yeah it's a whole bit we're trying to be like nicer to toad and i was i was gonna try to be

00:02:15.400 meaner to him but that video really was just that good 0.85

00:02:18.320 dude i'm i'm the motherfucking king baby i'm the i'm the libertarian nominee i'm next i i have more 0.99

00:02:24.120 gay sex more gay sex than chase oliver i'm fatter than lars mapstead and i'm more of a fed than 1.00

00:02:30.420 mike termot let's go i think if you tone it down by like five to ten percent perfect you're starting to sell me 1.00

00:02:37.420 no i completely disagree up up it by five to ten percent maybe fifty percent

00:02:43.260 i want you i want you imprisoned for the things that you say on the campaign track

00:02:47.040 out of all of us who would be the best at karaoke toad has been talking about his

00:02:50.820 his prolific karaoke career but do you think i mean i feel like clint's gonna be like no i'm great at karaoke

00:02:55.340 like i feel like no no i'm not but well i mean in fairness i'm great at everything but like i'm not 0.84

00:03:00.240 great at karaoke that's like one of the things that clint's like he's like yeah i'll fucking 0.98

00:03:04.280 spike the shit out of a football he's like yeah i'll sing the shit out of a mariah carey song 0.98

00:03:07.600 well you know clint clint we know who he is so he would just do limp biscuit and he would 0.97

00:03:14.820 just he would be in that room i would do i would do link at park if uh if i hadn't become known as

00:03:21.640 uh fat lard durst or whatever lard biscuit of fat fred durst fame what did you sing i don't know

00:03:27.640 why fed durst i believe at the lp convention what did you sing there oh i sang i think i sang rage

00:03:37.820 yeah yeah it was it was rage against the machine i saw the videos i gotta say it's bewildering to me

00:03:44.220 but you know just based on the video context just seeing the video alone complete opposite vibe with

00:03:49.180 that one i'm sorry i mean i wasn't there so it might be different but you know just like the

00:03:53.000 captured moments in time wait what do you mean i don't know performance you remember yeah you got

00:03:57.220 remember that was the thing people that you got around time like raked over the coals on that one

00:04:01.000 didn't you clint well yeah but yeah i got i got raked by the people that don't like toads everybody's

00:04:06.940 been like wow this is actually pretty good and clint there it might be an option to get that toad you're

00:04:12.000 like whoa and then with clint you're like what are you doing like it's like he's you know i mean like

00:04:15.740 it's uh it's expectations it's like it's the soft bigotry of low expectations for toad's cover

00:04:21.480 musically was a fucking nightmare disaster like listening to it was awful but the presence like 0.99

00:04:26.660 the body language oh so it's like a toad when like a black dude reads you're like whoa 1.00

00:04:31.160 you gotta keep in mind too i didn't want to be on stage i was literally dragged up there toad

00:04:36.600 toad desires the stage she does oh i love the stage baby it's my it's it's my element dude top

00:04:42.380 in pre-show is talking about how uh perfect my my pitch is i could see i could see toad's mom

00:04:48.440 toad's mom like picking him up and putting like a wig on him when he's a baby and bringing him to 0.65

00:04:53.380 like talent shows and shit and making him bringing him a little mollywog oh we're just gonna play 0.99

00:04:58.260 all my ukulele covers that's that's not gonna make for a good show what the fuck please don't 0.99

00:05:02.100 let's not do that let's not do that play just a little bit play just a little bit 0.99

00:05:05.200 all right that's enough of that that's not perfect pitch no it is we hate we hate our

00:05:15.580 well uh now i guess we'll get the show started i i you know we we really dodged a bullet this week

00:05:22.160 and um for those that that haven't been paying attention there was an assassination attempt on

00:05:27.260 the presidential candidate toad no no the the five of us he missed five of us have been um a

00:05:33.580 we don't we don't make a lot of money from this show and we've been funding our lifestyles by 0.90

00:05:38.940 selling cocaine to hunter biden and uh he got busted he got busted we're pimping out hookers 0.74

00:05:46.060 thank you joe biden because uh he got the doj to cover it up and we're we're back in business 0.99

00:05:52.100 nothing it doesn't even matter motherfucker takes videos of us dropping off kilos at his house 0.96

00:05:57.960 doesn't even matter baby it's a beautiful thing it really today today came out they said they will 0.98

00:06:03.080 probably not find who uh the culprit of the little we the little baggie of cocaine they found at the

00:06:08.860 white house can you most likely they won't find who did it so i think it was ours it was tower game

00:06:14.740 what is tower game that's what i keep saying what is tower game well illegal activities well they can

00:06:21.360 they can probably dna test right because that bag of cocaine was probably in somebody's butthole 0.87

00:06:25.680 no no no no culprit no one knows it wasn't my butthole it wasn't no hunter didn't have to

00:06:32.100 keyster it to get into the white house he doesn't go to security you can't get to get to like a high

00:06:36.220 security place like that and realizing there's like not really any security for that and you're like

00:06:39.640 it'd be it's just great because like he keysters it to get it in there and then he forgets it behind 0.99

00:06:45.620 like he just leaves it behind what the fuck honey this guy real crackhead no seriously though 0.99

00:06:50.300 how fucking like aside from the allegations about pedophilia which is problematic i'll grant you 0.99

00:06:55.360 that uh 176 miles per hour while actively smoking crack fucking legendary guys i'm telling you there 0.98

00:07:05.100 is i mean i've done a lot of cool shit i don't think i've ever even gotten close to that also the 0.96

00:07:10.480 pedophilia stuff it's just with his own family right so it's like a fair a fair point that's like two 0.83

00:07:15.380 negatives they cancel out yeah that's right they're like what they're royal blood in their

00:07:18.800 own minds so i think it's like the old rules it works another great point thank you so much yeah 0.96

00:07:23.760 so really he is the coolest guy in the world i mean he's doing he's doing literal king shit like 0.94

00:07:29.980 yeah he's like i'm gonna i'm gonna do drugs i'm gonna drive fast i'm gonna like uh be corrupt 0.87

00:07:36.220 impregnate my knees across the world across the whole world he is like well and look it was it's

00:07:41.340 just kind of you know he's uh he's doing it for the family right it's a very family oriented thing

00:07:46.240 that's true joe biden's joe biden's like come on and take a shower with ashley with me let's go 1.00

00:07:50.700 and he's he's a family because he's like my brother is dead i'm gonna fuck his wife and that's that's 1.00

00:07:55.600 what a family man does exactly you gotta look after your dad your brother's dead isn't that 0.99

00:08:01.140 literally she was still alive and he was still alive but same thing i swear it's like old

00:08:07.440 testament law that like isn't it like if you're unmarried like dude and your brother dies you're

00:08:12.040 supposed to take his wife yeah i think it's not if you're married or not i think it's just like

00:08:17.100 regardless but interesting story interesting story here so my my father's mother is from puerto

00:08:24.060 rico straight from puerto rico like lived on a mountaintop and her job was to protect the rum that 0.99

00:08:28.800 they bootlegged and she would like bury it carry it up and down a mountain ship but she was married 0.99

00:08:33.020 to this one guy his last name rodriguez he died no way and she married his brother that's my that's

00:08:40.220 my grandfather so yeah that's like how it happens yeah uh if brothers are living together and one of

00:08:46.060 them dies without a son his widow must not marry outside the family her husband's brother shall take 0.96

00:08:51.040 her and marry her and fulfill the duty of a brother-in-law to her jesus dude how many times

00:08:58.740 do you think a brother-in-law was like i'm gonna kill my yeah dude i was i was gonna say 0.72

00:09:03.740 that had happened at least one time yeah why why did little dicky no deuteronomy deuteronomy 25 5

00:09:13.240 off the top of his little little like i've been thinking about this one for a while

00:09:17.000 little dicky my brother yeah well i was gonna say i wish i had a brother that i could murder so that i 0.99

00:09:22.700 could do this but uh little little dicky i think is um told the type of nigga to kill his brother 1.00

00:09:27.320 marry his wife and still not get laid yeah that's right uh will dicky um is an altar boy i believe 0.98

00:09:35.160 so he's you know he's kind of under that pressure that we're all familiar with please don't dox

00:09:40.440 little dicky jesus christ sorry unbelievable we don't even know who little dicky is but thanks

00:09:46.940 for pressing all i've never met him i honestly i don't even know if toad's telling the truth about

00:09:50.300 that but uh i know i i am on the theory that toad is just lying about everything like literally his

00:09:58.480 entire life is a lie and i'm on he hasn't been a recital one day in his life yeah that's true the

00:10:03.360 suicide thing complete lie so that's good yeah this is awesome yeah i'm not a virgin you're not a virgin 0.99

00:10:08.500 no you fuck a lot of women which so there's a lot of good and bad to this toad i want you to see that 1.00

00:10:13.880 that you have fucked a lot of women you also right i'm just a liar these are all great bits though 1.00

00:10:20.040 like i i appreciate them they've given us a ton of material great bits you're killing it dude 0.99

00:10:24.360 here's why i think you're right because toad always acts up the day before the show or the day of the 0.81

00:10:30.320 show right and he's he's doing it like like it's been multiple times sometimes he acts a fool 0.96

00:10:34.980 sometimes he's gonna kill himself no no no no i i get excited about the show yeah do you know but then 0.97

00:10:39.620 sometimes yeah because all day all day you were just amoging us yeah he's like hashtag tough toad 0.96

00:10:45.400 top lotsa is just fucking jealous because he just feels like toad stepping us turf that's what's 0.94

00:10:50.340 going on here top got his energy top got uh fucking monstarred in the like space jam monstar dude 0.98

00:10:56.160 toad came in and sucked the funny out of him and the toughness and the grit and was like 1.00

00:11:01.580 literal energy vampire the funny comes from my dick toad that's hilarious and he sucked it right out 1.00

00:11:07.240 yeah i sucked it right off man took that foreskin to jew mountain that's what he did 1.00

00:11:13.480 oh yeah updates i still have my foreskin fuck you adl top you weren't really your wife hasn't 1.00

00:11:19.280 oh no this is oh no that's uh that's the lectern guy oh oh it is yeah shout out shout out adam the 1.00

00:11:28.580 lectern guy he said this is one of one yeah you can see you can see mine right above my name

00:11:33.300 if you can see right there oh yeah oh yeah i was looking at that uh it's quite nicely displayed

00:11:37.380 as this one yeah you're right yeah oh do we want to touch on um by the way so we did me top and

00:11:44.840 clint did elijah schaefer's show last friday and it got cut like midstream and so we did a stream

00:11:52.340 on here afterwards just kind of was that is that show on the uh our locals it is on the locals

00:11:59.300 subscribe to the locals but did you want to touch yeah that's true you just yeah if you want to see

00:12:06.020 that stream go to the locals yeah the bonus stream post slash shafer and so we we did have a few uh

00:12:12.360 patreon only streams that we did in the patreon day so i will i will uh link to those on the locals as

00:12:17.200 well it was it the elijah cutting midstream was fucking hilarious to me because we touched on this 0.99

00:12:23.880 that shit was jank for one his whole ass setup ghetto ass shit uh didn't he say he paid thousands 1.00

00:12:32.740 for that thousands it's like his own website he said thousand dollars eighty thousand to have a 1.00

00:12:38.000 three second delay it looked like windows 95 operating system it was bullshit there was no

00:12:43.780 settings on any sign he's like he's like but we get to send you each individual link so i'm like

00:12:48.140 that's not efficient i send one link out to people and spend like 25 a month and we both shows run

00:12:57.360 off my stream yard that's how fucking yeah but if he does the only role for 80 years and you do the 0.94

00:13:04.120 show for 80 years he's gonna come out on top that's true you gotta think about that yes do you think 0.96

00:13:08.640 80 times 25 yes that's high time preference well 25 times 12 times 80 yeah you think they do like

00:13:15.260 the netflix shit the years still doesn't get to 80 grand who do you think he's sharing his keys with 0.75

00:13:20.020 who do you who do you think has his password like because somebody else and like like tucker 0.98

00:13:24.580 carlson's using the same bullshit system as him and like he's he's sharing his password with someone 0.85

00:13:28.780 else like fucking netflix or something like that he spent 80k he's like i gotta get value out of this 0.99

00:13:32.460 and give this to other people and they're probably like what the fuck but there is no value 0.99

00:13:35.420 there's no value in it elijah that fucking system was garbage yo well now it makes sense on why 0.99

00:13:41.180 it makes sense now on why anytime you like watch any type of broadcast there is a huge delay in 0.99

00:13:48.700 between when they ask a question they answer it it's like tonight they just sit there just like 0.98

00:13:52.300 yeah bob that's right um i do hate it like it's like oh wait you go i go you go oh it's fucking 0.99

00:14:00.000 garbage when you can this is street this is free stream yard is free it's insane you could go on 0.99

00:14:05.320 we're paying we're paying for it yeah but i know you could use it for free and way better 0.94

00:14:10.340 yeah yeah you can do the streaming for free you can't do this many people without paying but

00:14:15.200 whatever it doesn't matter but elijah i mean hey it was a great he has a great show and he was it

00:14:19.940 was really fun but y'all vibed hard hard it worked out it cut off now you got a second episode

00:14:25.000 uh josie says hunter literally went through the justice system just to make sure his own daughter 0.97

00:14:29.180 could never use the biden name made her a legal bastard that's some king shit that's a good point 1.00

00:14:33.380 oh that is wow she's a snow that is yeah that's game of thrones shit yeah yeah do you think hunter 1.00

00:14:41.060 biden watches game of thrones he's like write that down yeah he's doing everything all right 0.99

00:14:45.580 my dad already fucked my sister so i can't do that one i feel like he breastfed until he was 10 0.98

00:14:51.640 doing a ton of cocaine watching uh game of thrones must be amazing if you could if you have like the 0.98

00:15:00.220 power and money to do all the things that's a great live stream idea tower gang tower gang watches

00:15:06.480 dude um dude if hunter biden was breastfed watches got on coke game oh we could do that yeah if

00:15:14.840 hunter biden yeah it's it's a it's a i don't know yo yo we do a shitload of uh hold on hold on hold

00:15:20.280 up all right we do a shitload of coke and then we stay up as long as it takes to watch all five seasons

00:15:26.280 yeah we go completely insane all eight seasons dude dude i'll be doing all that i'll be doing all that 0.98

00:15:34.520 you can call me john snow motherfucker yeah dude he just stole this joke how much cocaine would we 0.94

00:15:40.620 need to do that i get it i get it oh so much cocaine dude because doesn't it like run out out of like 0.97

00:15:46.260 hunter hunter's not gonna get his supply this week if you don't know what i'm saying

00:15:49.180 there's the wolf of eight ball street okay all right all right all right what do we what do we 0.99

00:16:00.740 have to get into oh let's do mailbag let's do the mailbag yeah yeah yeah shit 0.99

00:16:04.500 mailbag i hear i hear the mailbag sound 0.99

00:16:06.580 how many pets would wood chipper or pet chipper chip of a pet chipper could chip pets

00:16:15.920 that's confederate depends on the age of consent so if we want to talk about that let's let's set

00:16:21.580 down some ground rules age of consent let's go top you go first age of consent what do you

00:16:25.140 right now what do you think these people's age of 34 these aboriginals like well like what do you 1.00

00:16:32.560 think they think they don't understand the concept of consent it doesn't even compute with them no

00:16:37.440 that's a good question can you actually hold an aboriginal like responsible for their can you can 1.00

00:16:43.060 you hold a gorilla responsible 1.00

00:16:44.980 seriously but 34 is clint's maximum age of consent i mean if we're going by gorilla rules i think as long as they don't kill a kid they can do whatever pretty much

00:16:56.600 that's true it's like as long as it's under i guess well harambe has something to say about that didn't 0.94

00:17:02.760 well it said as long as it doesn't kill a kid he's fucking dead he did nothing wrong yeah thank you 0.99

00:17:07.500 they should have let him fuck that kid i i feel like harambe and those aboriginal musicians did nothing 1.00

00:17:13.360 wrong dude the um the the mother was completely a fault for the harambe like if if they were fucking 1.00

00:17:19.920 their own children i would i would look at them and i would just be like yeah just let them go i'd be like 0.98

00:17:24.280 good do not do not mix races with us normal 0.88

00:17:27.240 should they redo the hills have eyes and it's just aboriginal people but they actually don't 1.00

00:17:34.820 inbreed it's just them what is up with aboriginals looking how they look 1.00

00:17:39.120 they're not inbred that's just them why do they look like that though

00:17:46.820 you think there's some like white white girl australian that like has 1.00

00:17:50.860 like will go and sneak into their territory and just fuck some aboriginal man or something 1.00

00:17:54.600 like you know how because like the white girls here fuck black guys like that kind of shit same 1.00

00:17:57.960 thing dude the the aboriginals thought i was a monkey for a second 1.00

00:18:00.800 the first one on the left you know like when you see something real quick and like your your mind

00:18:08.300 goes to its immediate thought i had to like then reprocess it and be like oh not a monkey

00:18:12.440 dude that guy that guy looks like one of those like old guys that you see like 1.00

00:18:16.500 the guy right there playing basketball with you at the top left man yeah this guy looks like he looks

00:18:22.120 like quincy dude dude these the aboriginals look like they were like frozen in time in like the 1.00

00:18:31.360 neanderthal era and they were thought out have you ever seen uh tongans those dude that like i think

00:18:36.980 the the worst smelling people i've ever met is tongan there was a tongan dude in my engineering class

00:18:42.460 and that where's that so from from tonga tonga is a pacific island country i believe of course you

00:18:48.460 would know was it no no no was it tongans tongans are beautiful no no it wasn't that it was a smell 0.98

00:18:53.120 great i don't know what you're talking about no not those fuck we didn't have tongans no tongans 0.99

00:18:57.640 are great at sports let me not i played beach volleyball with a bunch of uh raiders and seahawks 1.00

00:19:03.800 defensive backs that were all tongans all simones and tongans and they were fucked like they were all 0.98

00:19:08.340 shorter than me and they could all jump two to three feet higher than me it was 0.99

00:19:11.960 un-fucking-believable dude i thought samoans were like i thought samoans were like fat like 0.96

00:19:18.000 lines off the screen and by the way the uh the aboriginal um like petrol sniffing stuff that we 0.95

00:19:24.560 talked about a few weeks ago that stuff is real and i found that there there's actually a movie that

00:19:29.780 focuses on that on a petrol sniffing kid and it actually it won like con film festival honestly

00:19:36.760 though like why it's the same it's the same exact issue of like putting all of the pandas and zoos

00:19:43.060 and trying to get them to reproduce just let the aboriginals take themselves out with fuel inhalation i 0.98

00:19:49.400 haven't seen what are we what are we doing somebody sent me uh they sent me a video of owen benjamin

00:19:54.080 saying that pandas aren't even real i haven't watched it yet but i'm ready to believe it say it two

00:19:59.860 more times and i'm in i'm like yeah dude uh so uh dicky let me remember uh it's uh poppin new guinea 0.99

00:20:06.220 so we call them the pngs they smell like absolute dog shit man and they're i mean and they're men 0.97

00:20:13.020 and women indistinguishable i feel like if people are more than 7 000 miles away from us we're allowed 0.99

00:20:20.300 to be racist and you can't even get mad at us for it dude i don't think they even have the internet man 0.72

00:20:24.400 i'd really i mean they probably don't who gives a fuck i was surprised i mean this dude would come 0.98

00:20:30.440 in he always wore tims uh like timberlands i don't know why like but i mean they were nasty 0.99

00:20:35.560 timberlands and like smelled like ass could barely talk i don't know like i don't know how he made it 0.85

00:20:40.860 through i'm pretty sure he was failing his classes but they had to be like uh well well he just just 0.98

00:20:46.020 you know just you know he would be the valedictorian if he was in an aboriginal school 0.96

00:20:49.580 just so you know that's how fucked up they are we actually had me and him are the same actually 0.97

00:20:55.840 you know how like native americans in america are kind of like that that people we don't really think 0.99

00:21:01.500 about or talk about or anything aboriginals are the same thing but like yeah 10 times worse they're 1.00

00:21:06.580 so they're so embarrassed like what do you think australians pretend as if they don't exist

00:21:10.660 yeah yeah they do it's just like these are the people whose land we stole they're totally backwards 1.00

00:21:16.040 they're savages we don't care about these people yeah by the way i'm pretty sure uh our toad only 0.97

00:21:23.920 sent out the fucking mailbag today so that i think that was literally the only one because he slacked 0.98

00:21:28.940 so if you guys have any questions in the chat did i have an eye on brandy good it was either last 0.99

00:21:32.920 night or this morning i forget you sent it this morning tough toad just killing it aren't you 1.00

00:21:37.360 okay yeah just too busy wearing his tight leather jacket so fuck you can't talk shit from the beginning 1.00

00:21:42.720 i was fucking pussy all night guys what do you want me to do yeah that's right on the patreon who 1.00

00:21:47.480 gives a shit exactly dude dude i can't i can only post during my refractory period bro that's right 1.00

00:21:55.680 man i i don't have time for the mailbag travels might pick up the smell of body or notes that 0.99

00:22:01.360 locusts do not wash their hands but now i'm telling you the body odor is insane i just don't think they

00:22:06.000 wash what is a gypsy what is it because i was at my uh my italian friend's wedding and his mom is

00:22:12.380 from like off the boat italy from like one of these places and she was telling me how terrified she was

00:22:17.180 of gypsies like when she first got here she said i saw a woman dressed like a gypsy and i thought she 0.91

00:22:22.200 was gonna like stab everyone in my town well they're uh they're like they even look like they're 0.73

00:22:26.280 literally nomadic and they're like uh i think they're nomadic and and they rob people and they're

00:22:33.180 like the modern day well semi-modern like a century ago or two version of the jews because you know 0.99

00:22:39.560 like the wandering race or whatever the time they're basically like an ethnic group originally from

00:22:43.380 romania i think holy shit jeff said gypsies aren't real gypsies were actually the only group that 0.98

00:22:49.200 hitler took out that no one cared about oh yeah we get it fuck yeah no no he he rounded because that's 0.99

00:22:54.700 what people forget it's like because the jews just take all the credit uh but like he ran out of 1.00

00:22:59.440 the jews the gypsies i like the big uh we died the most you didn't die that's the jews the faggots 1.00

00:23:13.140 and um the gypsies you said that hard i was like faggots that was really aggressive now listen this is 1.00

00:23:23.620 the letter f faggot but yeah he killed like a ton of gypsies and no one gives a fuck no one no one 1.00

00:23:33.820 even it's like not even a footnote in history yeah but yeah but look yeah that's our producer uh yeah 1.00

00:23:44.600 yeah and they them in more ways than one i mean i think if you look at the uh the purse strings of

00:23:49.220 the holocaust it was weirdly uh who would have thought they were controlling the banks then too 0.88

00:23:54.000 look man it was it was self-defense because the gypsies and the jews are just robbing them 1.00

00:23:59.920 the gypsies were probably the ones using the pool because like jews really don't go in a pool 1.00

00:24:04.420 you never see them with their fucking yarmulkes on in a pool chilling but gypsies look like they like 1.00

00:24:08.600 to have a good time so that's why they built the pools there what did dick i like what is this 0.99

00:24:12.300 gypsies are cool oh my god i don't know did y'all did y'all see uh i saw a meme like the other day

00:24:17.760 but it was on wikipedia on the russian ukraine war and it you know on wikipedia always says like

00:24:22.820 belligerence and then like on each side and it has their supporters if you look at the supporters

00:24:27.480 israel supports both sides which is fucking hilarious i don't know if it's true but i did see a meme on it 0.60

00:24:34.940 it's like yeah the wikipedia on there or what it's i feel like gypsy chicks put out but like they 1.00

00:24:40.240 don't shave so it's kind of a bummer real long skirts is that what a gypsy looks like i'm not 1.00

00:24:47.560 even sure i don't know but um dicky sent me a uh papua new guinean un ambassador or something and

00:24:56.440 it's basically like a a naked dude oh yeah we're gonna need to play that dude i had a guy i sent it 0.95

00:25:03.380 in the chat you can't see his dicks i think we had a guy in elementary school or no maybe i think 0.99

00:25:08.080 it might be like middle school that was from papua new guinea and that motherfucker he like 1.00

00:25:12.120 anytime we were in gym class was not wearing shoes it was very weird like he just had the weird and 0.99

00:25:17.200 like but that motherfucker could fly and it was weird he's a white dude but like it was very odd 0.97

00:25:21.780 all these island people jump bro he was kind of like a ethnically ambiguous looking guy so like but 0.99

00:25:27.480 he like kind of looked more on the white side so maybe he had a little bit of i never asked him

00:25:30.920 specifically it was a long time you can't i mean you could oh my god hell yeah by the way that is 0.99

00:25:36.340 his actual cock that's his actual cock wow that's um that's that's odd looking yeah wow yeah my god 0.99

00:25:43.760 that is crazy dude honestly honestly pretty cool to walk into the un and be like yeah this is like 0.99

00:25:50.740 our native garb like we're just naked all the time i'm gonna be honest with you though like yes

00:25:54.260 it is chad like but it's also like hey uh you haven't dressed like that in a thousand years

00:26:00.080 how about you relax just like they do every day jokes on you this is what we actually invented clothes 0.99

00:26:05.540 yeah dude dude is he is he actually wearing that on his dick that's what i'm saying i know that is 0.99

00:26:11.020 his penis it's just like me they just haven't it's a it's a practice there where they constantly are 1.00

00:26:16.940 ball checking each other enhance yeah they they elongate and narrow their penises it doesn't make 1.00

00:26:23.560 sense yeah oh shit it's like a pipe so he could smoke his own dick dude dude that guy's that guy's 1.00

00:26:28.420 imagine imagine if that's like some peace pipe thing and they like it like kind of clips in 1.00

00:26:33.360 they unclip it they're just like here you go it's like it's like it's super it's super super uh 0.99

00:26:39.820 like disrespectful to snot not smoke their fucking penis pipe you guys aren't seeing what's going on 0.99

00:26:46.960 here i think this is one of the few cultures that was not touched by the foreskin takers and as such 1.00

00:26:52.500 they have superior foreskins that's gotta be it that's gotta be it hey you know it's my foreskin

00:26:58.380 you know it's the papua new guinean tribes that uh are famous for that documentary where that's like

00:27:04.960 the the rite of passages that they have you know 14 and 15 year old boys blow the chief 1.00

00:27:09.280 elder or whatever to become men what i believe that's really a thing suck this dick to prove you 1.00

00:27:16.460 love papa new guinea no seriously that's why they call him papa yeah yeah come to papa and you'll be 1.00

00:27:24.380 a new guinea actually actually catholicism made it to papa new guinea before almost any other religion 0.99

00:27:28.840 so you can kind of do you think that that's why they're all sucking each other's dicks yeah so like 0.99

00:27:33.200 it's like but only only the the you know the upper men like the older men just a tip just a tip 0.99

00:27:38.060 is you know is papa new guinea like like uh australia for britain but for italy because

00:27:43.880 where is it yeah or the new guineas yeah yeah that makes sense yeah yeah yeah i get it yeah

00:27:50.380 wait does that mean that i guess they are black just like italians you see toad 0.99

00:27:55.040 clink can get away with that kind of shit because he doesn't do it all the time but that's a toad joke 0.99

00:28:00.340 and we kind of like all giggle and laugh at it if you do it constantly we just can't roll with 0.99

00:28:04.160 that where is this place well i did i called it the catholic church

00:28:08.160 the roman catholic church so that's that's the most popular religion in papua new guinea

00:28:16.400 impoverished nation it usually is going to be catholics there uh it's like remember that cell 1.00

00:28:23.760 park where it's like all the sad starving africans and they have the the oh you want to read the bible 1.00

00:28:27.920 would you like a piece of candy like that's basically what's going on so true so wait 0.99

00:28:34.780 where is this place though i don't understand where on the earth it's somewhere in the fucking 0.99

00:28:38.800 pacific ocean it's on an island it's on an island it's on an island that's like north of australia 0.89

00:28:44.060 yeah it's like between australia and new zealand or in that general area something like that

00:28:47.880 australia it's in between the philippines and australia so it's not so if it's i think i think it's

00:28:52.720 actually is it is it one of the is it one of the places where they think amelia earhart crashed

00:28:57.380 yeah right north of us yeah i thought you were wrong new zealand oh indonesia is what i was thinking

00:29:03.560 of yeah i was gonna say if you say the east uh yeah yeah indonesia is the other part of that island

00:29:08.580 it's probably getting also the one where they the the boys have to stick their hand in like the

00:29:12.500 that like mitten of ants of like bullet ants and then keep it in there as long as it's in the same place 0.99

00:29:17.200 and then the chief while they're getting stung comes in their mouth it's fucked up 0.99

00:29:20.900 it's take his swollen arm out his fucking hand just bitten riddled with the like bullet ant bites 1.00

00:29:33.080 and then you have to get a hand job i knew exactly where you were going because and his cum what they 1.00

00:29:38.780 figured out is that the cum was the only soothing ailment they had like they had it figured out how 0.99

00:29:43.000 that's what they tell you at least i bet you jizz is probably a great soothing ointment if you think 0.84

00:29:47.500 oh my god think about the the yeah it's the kind of the the think about the cost viscosity of it

00:29:54.080 like it's really good work well yeah uh highly viscous is this from hold on is this but is it

00:29:59.700 yeah obviously this is crazy but is it from papua new guinea i think so you ever seen you know amazon

00:30:05.880 amazon people oh it's in the amazon my bad my bad my bad oh no shout out to my papa new guineans i got

00:30:12.100 it wrong sorry yeah you're savages but not this bad oh no no this is the ants initiation it might 0.99

00:30:20.840 be the new guineans that are still fucking sucking each other off no look and they have to fucking 1.00

00:30:24.000 i'm pretty sure it like it makes you after the pain is so much that you start getting like high off 1.00

00:30:28.620 of it and so they literally just start like start tripping balls from uh pain

00:30:32.720 they're literally just like dancing this guy's just like if we lived close together this would 0.99

00:30:38.200 be us every day dude what kind of what kind of answer are they with cock and ball torture 0.99

00:30:43.740 honestly i honestly think that we would become a tribe like this like we would just do shit like 0.99

00:30:48.520 this we would wear fucking like yeah garments and stuff like yeah now literal gang oh my gosh get 0.96

00:30:54.580 like our tgs like the jerseys but instead of jerseys be like more of like that african garb type 0.99

00:31:00.100 vibe look you know like that aesthetic like the shikis yeah yeah how the fuck are those jerseys by 0.99

00:31:05.000 the way fuck you little dicky can you i didn't i haven't even looked at making them can you pull 1.00

00:31:10.000 up where's my free shit dude youtube i put up a youtube clip in the chat this is like african 1.00

00:31:16.080 fighting this is african mma it's the dumbest shit in the world you mean mma no no it's african 1.00

00:31:22.300 mma before you play before you play is it just like that guy from uh blood sport that was hopping 1.00

00:31:28.920 around that one african guy in blood sport that literally like crawled like a monkey around if 0.98

00:31:32.940 you know what i'm talking about like it's even dumber they they put like a cast on their hand 0.99

00:31:37.220 like a solid cast so it's just like a fucking rock only on one hand and it seems like they can only 0.98

00:31:42.800 hit with one hand until they knock each other out and then after they knock each other out they put 0.96

00:31:47.700 their bowls on the other guy's head and that's like the whole it's like this is the whole fight 0.99

00:31:52.140 of africa it's like african mma play that shit it's crazy it's called dombe real quick someone 0.99

00:31:57.340 brought up that they're in uh some native americans at a ritual where the others would fuck the bride 0.99

00:32:02.120 at every wedding it's funny how like a lot of religions and cultures all just devolve to hey 1.00

00:32:06.100 we're up here we gotta fuck yeah dude evolution bro no it's like we're testing your bride for you 0.98

00:32:13.780 okay no dude um kings the kings the kings back in like uh like european medieval times that's what 0.99

00:32:19.600 they did to fucking braveheart dog that's why you fucking wouldn't ham on them what was the name 0.96

00:32:23.560 well the kings in medieval times anytime they got married in order to consummate the marriage 0.99

00:32:28.180 that's what it is prima nocte yeah yeah no but like the kings in the medieval times whenever they

00:32:33.160 had to consummate a marriage they literally had to do it like they would put their beds on like um 0.98

00:32:38.220 uh stand or like on a like a stage and they would have to fuck in front of the entire court 0.98

00:32:43.760 to show that they are consummated that's high pressure man that's why they call him the king 0.98

00:32:48.920 imagine going in there you just can't get it up it's just like i they literally know they would 0.99

00:32:54.060 if you couldn't fuck her like they cut it up they would say the uh the marriage isn't consummated and 1.00

00:32:58.420 it's not uh because it was like a contract between like two nations so like he broke the contract because 1.00

00:33:03.840 you're gonna fuck my daughter that's what they did before only fans those yeah no dude dude this 1.00

00:33:08.600 this is why monarchies were way better man why because they fuck your wife yeah i was like what 1.00

00:33:15.880 do you mean what pretty dope if you're the king i guess no no it's like i just like watching people 1.00

00:33:20.280 fuck i want to be in their room when they're fucking well we already know that about uh don't we 0.99

00:33:25.580 no no no because that's that's how they uh they formed the uh contracts between two families 1.00

00:33:31.420 i guess we just gave up on watching those africans fight uh adam 22 says it's officially

00:33:35.900 we're gonna watch another african fight this guy's wife oh yeah yeah this adam guy so for those that 1.00

00:33:43.580 haven't followed this story adam 22 has has one of the coolest lifestyles i've ever heard of 0.88

00:33:48.980 every week he and his significant other uh invite some random only fans bitch onto their stream they 1.00

00:33:55.900 sit down and they talk to her and then he has a threesome with them and he's been doing this forever

00:33:59.300 they do complete podcasts like a whole like one hour podcast like just any adam 22 but this week 0.98

00:34:05.180 this week his filthy fucking significant other got greedy yeah but she wanted to have a dude railer 1.00

00:34:11.260 and they went straight to the fucking pinnacle of the mountain and had this gargantuan gorilla man 1.00

00:34:16.520 come and savage his precious little flower yeah he's legit one of the biggest dicks in porn like that 1.00

00:34:22.060 it's ridiculous it's it's retarded it's like like this type shit it's that meme guy you know 1.00

00:34:28.420 a huge black guy this type shit yeah you know the huge black guy with the huge black dick that meme 1.00

00:34:33.220 it was that guy i mean if you're going to let your bitch fuck someone some other dude wouldn't you go 1.00

00:34:39.080 asian i mean honestly absolutely by the way uh this um well she probably had some say in it but uh 0.99

00:34:44.540 these people are actually like pretty famous which i was unaware of shockingly sure you were

00:34:50.020 well i had i had to go do some uh research on it and like they're not just getting like random like

00:34:56.040 only fans bitches either like they have explain this pause the thought so i can just read this so 0.99

00:34:59.920 we can go full screen all right adam 22 is is this dude that we're talking about and he says 0.98

00:35:03.980 it's officially been a week since i let my wife do porn with another guy i felt a little jealous at 0.99

00:35:08.860 first but overall it wasn't that big a deal she's watched me sleep with hundreds of girls and it's 1.00

00:35:13.400 never she's watched you no no she's done it with you no she's done it with you yes uh of girls and 0.99

00:35:18.180 it's never affected our relationship sleeping with that gentleman has been amazing for both her 0.99

00:35:22.440 career and our business overall i'm glad we did it and i'm happy to report her vagina has returned 1.00

00:35:28.720 to its original pre-bb how long afterwards did he wait to fuck her again it must have been like 1.00

00:35:34.960 not long enough how long did you have to wait after your wife had a baby dude yeah i was gonna say 0.99

00:35:39.860 dude he had to go get her the ron paul stitch after that you want to go to pre-bbc levels you need

00:35:45.720 the ron paul stitch adam hit me up i know a doctor he's like i got i got you bro honest to god i would

00:35:53.060 i would discard of her immediately oh she already they're not gonna i mean she looks ran through

00:35:57.740 already dude if you've seen her like she looks they also married and have some kids like he's 1.00

00:36:03.080 oh god what's up mark mark oh my god which you know i honestly i think it's weird obviously but

00:36:10.340 like whatever do you want it's the coping that really got me all the like the over and over

00:36:15.300 like if you just not dish anything or yeah that that's wild like worst yes if you add up that it's

00:36:21.680 like 155 pounds best guess i'm pretty sure it's not like a 45 pound bar so it's probably less than

00:36:26.960 that he tweets out i wasn't born i wasn't born with the strength required to let another dude bang

00:36:31.520 my wife it takes hours upon hours in the gym to gain this kind of strength weak men will never

00:36:36.360 understand as he puts up a weak load it's literally a warm-up that's like that's you know 0.99

00:36:41.800 who wasn't putting up weak loads yeah also just lifting up the dude's dick anyway like that's how 0.99

00:36:48.540 much this dude's dick weighs he's just like fucking like i said in the chat that there's an interesting 0.99

00:36:53.320 correlation between like how if he was lifting more weight like if he was doing 225 or 315 it would 0.99

00:37:00.020 be worse for me for some reason like the more i guess the more physically i still don't understand

00:37:04.620 that rationale go ahead i can kind of get into it i don't understand it either no no i'll tell you

00:37:09.640 why it's because he's saying he's seeing a weak man here and he's like i can see how a weak man

00:37:14.480 will give up to another man but if you're a strong an actual strong man how would you ever let someone 0.98

00:37:20.160 else fuck your wife he was like this guy was the logic doesn't make sense but it is like if you're 0.98

00:37:24.440 going to use that as your argument how are you going to put up what's a normal dude's like warm-up 1.00

00:37:28.880 because for me i will put on like my warm-up when i do benches like i start out with a bar i'll do like

00:37:33.400 probably 10 but they're really easy because the bar and then i'll throw on 45 on each side

00:37:37.320 and still do easy like slow like i usually do like half slow and controlled half kind of like fast but

00:37:42.340 still like good form just to kind of like stretch my muscles like it's nothing i could probably do

00:37:46.340 like 30 plus that black dude ran through this yes this girl right he did he did he did he did 10 reps 0.72

00:37:52.800 real quick because it was easy about this guy slow and controlled baby this guy adam is not funny

00:37:59.000 like i just don't understand none of the jokes that he's told he was on skanks he was on skanks

00:38:03.920 yeah he was on skanks you know you don't see that but it's more like for him he was more like he

00:38:09.040 generated content from the riff off of it wasn't like he necessarily was funny there's a lot to

00:38:13.400 rip off i was going to say well i'm saying he wasn't that funny he's telling he's telling jokes and

00:38:17.880 then has to explain them like every time i'm like i just like i don't know you're not funny dude

00:38:22.740 well uh do you see him with the other black dudes and they're like talking about i think he's just 0.99

00:38:27.660 like me except without the pussy yeah he's just like me well let me just let me just tell you man 0.99

00:38:37.840 um unlike adam unlike adam here i've never let another dude bang my wife that's true that's true 1.00

00:38:46.240 you got one up on him man one up baby that's one in the w column would you rather oh he was

00:38:52.640 ankle sorry this is a little delayed toad with a banger by the way would you rather be a version 1.00

00:39:00.480 that's never fucked or you have to be adam 22 that's fucked like literally hundreds of women but 1.00

00:39:07.100 also but also yeah why would i your fucking wife is getting railed out by black dudes as well and you 1.00

00:39:13.320 have to be cool i mean it's still better than i have a virgin otherwise you got kids with this 0.99

00:39:18.260 girl though um i don't know if i could do it i don't know if i could why it literally trust me i

00:39:24.160 wouldn't i wouldn't have kids with that girl still i wouldn't have a girl we're operating in this 0.94

00:39:28.360 hypothetical though it's one or the other don't be that person don't be that person yeah and to me 0.66

00:39:31.580 i'm going oh i'm gonna be that person top you're gonna be a virgin like i'd rather be a virgin 0.99

00:39:35.760 like because he's still like fucking crazy he's still fucking on the reg so he's still getting 1.00

00:39:39.600 pussy yeah like obviously it's like okay that's your wife that's weird that's fucked up but the 1.00

00:39:43.560 other option is never fuck ever i would oj simpson my bitch so fast your head would spin that guy's 1.00

00:39:49.460 dick is so big that guy's dick is so big that it changed the ethnicity of his children that are 1.00

00:39:53.920 probably like nine years old it just reached through a time portal retroactively you can't tell 1.00

00:39:59.940 me that jerking just jerking off for the rest of your life is not as bad as watching your wife get 0.99

00:40:06.420 railed by a black dude well i'd say that's if if that was the binary option if that was the 1.00

00:40:11.880 binary option but that's not the binary option because on top of watching your wife get fucked 1.00

00:40:15.940 by a big black dude you get to have threesomes with your wife and some other random smoke show 1.00

00:40:20.300 every single week forever this is not even clint not not just random either like they've fucked like 0.99

00:40:26.680 like really famous porn stars like riley reed and shit yeah no but but to me it's like i don't know 0.99

00:40:32.240 that makes it better or the woman you love you know you love her you've watched oh bro it's it's 0.98

00:40:37.560 hell it's hell yeah you know what's weird i was telling my wife about this a little bit and i'm

00:40:42.980 like i like like so it seemed like the girl did this with that that black dude because now she's 0.99

00:40:48.440 like officially a porn star right because she's with this guy but i'm like wouldn't they have been 0.99

00:40:52.320 porn stars already like you consider them porn stars because they fucked all these porn stars yeah 0.99

00:40:57.200 yeah but not really is it no it's not like you have to fuck a dude to be a porn star like there's 1.00

00:41:02.360 like the lesbian porn star that's like i wish you were really funny actually like like uh your father 1.00

00:41:09.020 must be uh really upset at you it's like no he's fine i'm not actually a porn star i only fuck women 0.99

00:41:13.040 on camera i guess he is a porn star in the way that we are comedians is that what that's it that 0.98

00:41:17.700 makes sense yes no no we are comedians exactly technically yeah we are professional comedians we get

00:41:23.880 paid crazy amounts of money you guys are you guys are debating whether you'd want to be this adam guy

00:41:32.360 or me and like this is like fucking insane to me because why would you want to be me better 0.98

00:41:39.160 question you would want to be adam yeah 0.73

00:41:42.780 maybe it's because you've never like actually gone to mythical to where you don't understand the 0.97

00:41:51.680 yeah that's that's the thing he's never gotten off from a blowjob how many mythicals adam 22 has

00:41:55.920 probably gotten a lot there's a lot that's the the valley because i mean what's the transfer rate 0.96

00:42:01.760 of getting your wife out to mythicals what do you think clint one to one 1.00

00:42:05.200 serious question i'll take one my wife getting rolled up by the biggest black dick in the world for 1.00

00:42:10.860 one mythical yo mythicals are special they're special they are special they're like literally once or twice 0.99

00:42:16.300 in a lifetime like let me ask your question let me ask this question as like if cole wasn't retarded he 0.96

00:42:21.420 would have asked this question would you rather be adam 22 your wife doesn't get railed out right 1.00

00:42:26.380 you're adam 22 right up until like a week ago but you look like toad or would you rather look like adam

00:42:31.980 22 and be toad uh i would rather be adam because uh i would which one can i get rid of the the 0.99

00:42:39.580 the fucking stupid ass confusing tattoos he has yeah what's no i want to i want to look like adam too 0.98

00:42:45.660 wait so now the question is you trade like so it's adam and i are trading our appearances yeah 1.00

00:42:51.500 you're just like toad that's it that's it yes look like adam have toad's life or you look like toad

00:42:56.620 and have adam's life you look like toad before again his wife looked like you look like toad i'd be 0.98

00:43:01.260 toad like who gives a shit like dude i'd like if you're pulling like i got a whole thing with uh 0.98

00:43:06.060 jeff charles's mother do the other day because i was giving him about looking there's a joke 0.99

00:43:09.580 someone made a joke about him looking like some his girlfriend's dad and it's like that really him 0.93

00:43:13.820 looking old really is not a slight yeah it was it's not like a slight on him if anything that's like

00:43:18.460 props if you're like if you were looking like toad and pulling off an adam 22 lifestyle you're like

00:43:23.660 i don't know how you're doing it but holy keep going like props dog you know that's right how am i

00:43:28.620 doing it the answer is cooking isn't that just the ghost of what who was the one the porn star in the 80s

00:43:34.620 70s and 80s that was like the number one and then he just got caught for like childhood stuff

00:43:40.860 yeah ron jeremy that's just ron jeremy's life then like ron jeremy yeah yeah ron jeremy yeah ugly 1.00

00:43:46.620 motherfucker huge cock so porn star because his cock is not even that big by the way i met him twice 1.00

00:43:52.140 both times in the airport you've met him you've seen it no why is this now just coming out because i met 1.00

00:43:58.540 him he's i don't know he's disgusting but his dick is not that big everyone that says that is lying 0.98

00:44:02.620 clint uh was about to join ron jeremy on epstein's plane that's what's going on maybe i met him in 1.00

00:44:08.380 the airport for that who the fuck cares i think his dick is big he's just like fat so it looks like 0.99

00:44:13.260 it's a weird optical illusion slightly above average we're not talking fucking that godzilla that just 1.00

00:44:17.580 ran through this poor adam 22's bitch we're talking by the way you're with me right i'm seeing this guy 1.00

00:44:22.940 fuck i don't know what does that mean about what what am i about with with like watching your wife get 1.00

00:44:26.940 railed out you're like nah no that's hell no it's obvious yeah yeah but you know what you would 1.00

00:44:31.820 rather choose first is not having a wife and not having any sex ever you could still have a wife and 0.87

00:44:36.700 be a virgin um yeah most of you guys are probably in that situation um 1.00

00:44:43.020 dude in all seriousness though i would not want to be that faggot i want to be me 1.00

00:45:05.820 motherfucker i'm out um how close is adam 22 to thank to fucking a tranny because i mean this 1.00

00:45:14.300 this is this is a downworld spiral like this is what do i do now my wife got fucked up what 1.00

00:45:19.820 new heights can i store to yes you have it'll be they both fuck a tranny they both fuck a tranny 1.00

00:45:25.340 that's where it comes out first is like where they're just like oh or or his wife fucks a tranny 1.00

00:45:31.180 eventually he's going to be getting fucked by a big black dude so he's on the steven crowder 0.99

00:45:34.700 um like he's on the steven crowder method right there that's where steven's i think all of it i 0.99

00:45:38.860 think all of this is a downward like it's a slippery slope where you just keep going down the rabbit

00:45:43.020 hole of just like down the slope is slippery because of all of the all that's what it is dude

00:45:49.980 i swear crowder like the gay thing i feel like i i don't completely get but like or i don't completely 1.00

00:45:54.940 think he's gay but now that i think about it i could totally see him be a tranny fucker like and 1.00

00:45:58.380 i guess it's still technically gay but it's like a different kind of gay i'd be you know what i mean 0.99

00:46:02.060 like it's i'd be stunned if crowder and malice don't tag team trannies on the weekends yeah dude 0.98

00:46:06.620 i think um adam 12 the uh the guy that he had uh fuck his wife was actually the uh the papua new 0.93

00:46:12.300 guinean uh king guy that was who it was hey hey mark random please don't ask gambling questions yeah 0.90

00:46:19.100 don't ask gambling questions we're trying to be here for two hours to enable him on this that's that's

00:46:24.780 that's not an over under either by the way elizabeth uh yesterday she like showed me a picture of 1.00

00:46:30.780 blair white on instagram and she was like i literally don't know how this is tranny she was 0.99

00:46:35.260 like this is like looking like a smoke show like it's crazy uh if i don't know if you can find the 0.99

00:46:41.180 picture i mean she has fake tits and a cock i'd pay good money to see her but it's not dude if 1.00

00:46:49.900 blair if blair white was in if blair white was in a porno i would watch it i would pay so much money 1.00

00:46:56.220 to see blair white fuck cole and his wife oh my god but it's not just like it's it's not just like 1.00

00:47:01.660 that she has fake tits it's like she has like women would you got a great face would you be mad 1.00

00:47:06.940 if if if blair white like fucked your wife with like what if you had like like a three inch penis 1.00

00:47:12.140 yeah no no don't they all have you know what you know what would make you feel better though 1.00

00:47:15.180 like oh this big fat stack of thousands i throw on your lap as she's fucking your wife 1.00

00:47:19.340 no yeah let's make it happen how does that work exactly so like so like so would you be able to 0.99

00:47:24.220 would you spend more on that happening or uh that one dude uh debating uh rfk jr

00:47:29.740 i'll buy you a new septic system i'll buy you a new septic system what i'll buy you a new septic

00:47:36.780 system if you do it i just want a rice cooker

00:47:42.860 all right good enough for me cole negotiating his way to the bottom 0.89

00:47:46.540 getting a tranny yeah i was gonna say that's what cole calls an asian uh asian wife or some 1.00

00:47:51.420 shit but he wants the lady boy so there you go uh so when you have a tranny like blair white you 1.00

00:47:58.300 know he she whatever starts going on uh like female hormones or whatever does that actually shrink your 1.00

00:48:03.660 cock no yes they get conversation no i don't i just don't think it gets up i just don't think it 0.96

00:48:08.940 gets smaller and it just doesn't get up at all i think it like it's i would have any porn i've 0.99

00:48:13.340 seen their dick works just fine they're professionals well i think those are just 0.99

00:48:22.620 it works uh better than mine so uh yeah what the fuck i sent it to the uh instagram chat by the way 0.99

00:48:29.340 so if you want to bring it up a little dicky tranny porn no no the blair white video dude 0.98

00:48:36.140 uh another reason i don't want to be that adam 22 guy uh i am much more uh i know well yeah 0.91

00:48:45.180 that i'm i i don't want to i i don't i don't want to be genocided i am much uh more sure of myself 0.93

00:48:52.140 and i have like constant boners man i'm a much stronger more virile man he's just not jerking off 0.99

00:48:58.860 anymore maybe he's like gone full like uh no fat why would you why would you jerk off if you had 1.00

00:49:05.660 three all the time isn't well true you don't need to but isn't oh i bet i bet adam 22 still jerks 0.98

00:49:10.700 off wait wait i'm sure he does but like why just no because you've never been like in like a

00:49:16.540 relationship where you're on the reg reg and you stills every now and then like you know what i just

00:49:20.540 kind of want to do it myself like yeah but i i look i i was in a relationship where i had lots of

00:49:26.140 threesomes but i i still i never had them as often as adam 22 did like he has it every week dude every

00:49:33.500 week it must get boring you think he's bored yeah yeah well yeah because dude no that's why this is

00:49:38.780 why that's why that's why you go down the slippery slope of like it's like only tranny 1.00

00:49:44.780 like that's crazy that's why i only have sex like once a week because i know that i get bored if i had more 0.99

00:49:50.540 i am in your face toad that's why does it i'm distracted by your wife you're like no babe if 1.00

00:49:56.940 you me more i'd be way i'd be so much more bored with sex toad like thank you for keeping it once 1.00

00:50:02.220 a week we'd go real viral right now if you were to start jerking off while we look at this 0.99

00:50:10.700 what is what is the music go ahead go ahead and do it you know you want to yeah play the 0.89

00:50:16.380 play the audio all right so stop playing the audio i'll be honest i don't find her that hot 1.00

00:50:22.620 but i feel like i've said this before i don't know uh i i'm not that hot but still what is she is she 0.82

00:50:27.500 so far as a tranny like great on a curve yeah that's like that's grade a tyranny meat right there 1.00

00:50:32.460 if you're well based on her name i believe she's caucasian yeah there we go she's oh that was a funny 0.99

00:50:40.620 stupid joke come on guys and i was like what is her name i don't know who it is but uh god honestly 0.97

00:50:45.420 said those hands give it away holy shit that's what i said to elizabeth too right when i saw it i 0.99

00:50:48.940 was like she was like how does she was like i could and i was like it's the she has man hands 0.98

00:50:52.700 every time every time like you see a tranny you're like show me it's a trap like just look at the 1.00

00:50:56.620 hands i just want to see the video again this is my excuse to see the video again play the video again

00:51:00.620 oh no dude you know you got to look for the adam's apple man that's how you do it no because you can

00:51:08.140 you can hide in adam's apple they can get it shaved down too but like uh yeah yeah they can so they

00:51:13.580 want to shave down their like larynx no they shave down like a bunch of stuff they do like facial

00:51:19.820 surgeries to make it less masculine so they don't have such a like square jaw and stuff but they uh

00:51:23.980 but the the hands you can't do anything with your hands they're gonna be the same way no matter what

00:51:28.620 i mean you can shave them they'll shave i guess shave it this is why ai this is why no i'm saying

00:51:33.740 they should literally shave the hair is what i'm saying even ai can't fix the hands bro nope

00:51:37.900 they still got those they still got those man knuckles it's started today i've been i've been 0.98

00:51:42.780 fighting with total day today and i've been fighting with fucking an ammunition company about uh nuclear 0.96

00:51:47.500 bombs and whether they're real or not dude he made some retarded points and i'll be honest like i 0.95

00:51:51.420 don't really care either way and i guess if i had to guess i'd assume we have a vaccinated opinion

00:51:55.580 going on go ahead wow yeah bring it up look at those look at those looking at pictures blair

00:52:02.060 oh the hands that's we're looking at the hands yeah look at those how many fingers just like i

00:52:06.220 expected six six fingers dude you think she she's a virgin her hands her hands look fine everyone 0.96

00:52:13.500 but you know what blew me away though with phoenix was when he made the point about the the camera and

00:52:18.780 the nuke thing or whatever he's like oh i'm sure these people could figure out a way to get to have a 0.95

00:52:23.180 camera that would get you know destroyed by a nuke you're like what what magical fucking material are 0.96

00:52:28.460 they like i get like maybe there's some credence to like the zoom thing but like to take the straight 0.97

00:52:34.620 up angle that oh no it just survived a nuclear blast i don't believe that they could five miles

00:52:39.820 i don't believe it i don't yeah in 1940 yeah but that's more believable the fact that we had a

00:52:45.900 question by the way that's more believable than the fact that we would have a camera that survived

00:52:50.140 a nuclear blast in 1940. like i'm not at least there's something to the zoom i told them i said

00:52:57.100 why don't we why don't we build our our cities with whatever they built those cameras there's like no

00:53:01.420 answer like yeah you like super humans look at how mad talk it's what i'm talking about yeah you 1.00

00:53:11.100 fuck in you okay jay thoreau said uh fuck mary kill blair white kamala harris and adam 22's chick 1.00

00:53:20.220 i've never i don't even know what adam 22's chick looks like she's uh she's again she's she's kind 1.00

00:53:24.860 of blair white kamala harris and adam 22's chick which is lena the plug is what her name is yeah she's 0.91

00:53:30.140 she's i think she's latina she's got fake tits now i mean she i mean she looks like she's for the 1.00

00:53:35.340 streets she's kind of thick yeah she's not looking great i mean no she's gonna be the 1.00

00:53:40.940 fuck she's the most attractive of all of them although like oh my god i don't think she's super 1.00

00:53:44.940 hot wait so it's so it's wait lena blair white and kamala harris yeah i think you marry you you 1.00

00:53:52.540 you marry kamala harris right yeah money because that's yeah for the money after that you're easy 1.00

00:53:57.180 life like you're not for them for the money you know she's good at sucking cock so you can 1.00

00:54:01.100 get that out of it is a non-issue because like if you're if you're married to a politician like 1.00

00:54:05.500 let's be real you're fucking you who gives a shit like you're you're pulling fucking like nancy 1.00

00:54:09.980 plosey husband yeah so so we can well you don't have to kill blair white though because she's going 1.00

00:54:14.380 to kill herself eventually yeah if cole married kamala harris then he could fuck his sister and 1.00

00:54:19.260 that would be like right in line with alabama right keep the bloodline clean the political bloodline clean 1.00

00:54:23.420 hell yeah um so i mean i mean the fuck part of it is obvious you got to fuck the the porn star but 1.00

00:54:29.740 yeah i think you would go like i think you would go you have to go kill blair white because like 1.00

00:54:34.780 i mean one of these are you get these get these facts out of my face yeah huh yeah we wouldn't 0.90

00:54:40.860 want to do facts on this show man 800 yards and they said that there was like lead steel and glass

00:54:45.660 or something okay the glass is like maybe from 800 yards you could have something that would

00:54:49.660 somehow magically survive it but if there's glass at all no it's gonna blow it out i still don't

00:54:53.580 understand why it wouldn't little dicky's he's trying to debate me the glass too he's trying to debate me 1.00

00:54:58.700 from the backstage fuck you coward he's trying to bring back to this fucking conspiracy fight get 0.99

00:55:05.260 the fuck out there's no facts here it's just i'm telling you how i feel and i'm right i'm right 1.00

00:55:09.980 i think i think if i say kill for the one i want to say then i'll have the secret service arrive so i 0.99

00:55:14.860 can't say that oh just say uh kill whoever blew um willie brown willie brown slick willie i'm not 1.00

00:55:23.900 saying that no i i i don't think you can because then you have to either fuck or marry blair white 1.00

00:55:30.460 which one are you going to do fuck or marry blair white if you marry probably marry her i think she 1.00

00:55:34.140 seems fun yeah she'd retweet you a lot and you definitely get more followers right but your life 1.00

00:55:39.420 is set if you you'd have to blair blair white has a lot of money right we're getting twitter famous one

00:55:46.060 one way or the other does not have a lot of money no there's no way blair white they're already 0.99

00:55:50.860 blair already follows me so we're like we're almost there blair's famous though just because

00:55:55.660 you're famous you don't have a lot of money yeah that's true she probably i think she's decent 1.00

00:56:00.860 probably like well on money like i bet you well our life is fine like it's not like so far as rich rich

00:56:06.940 no not rich rich it's weird it's weird because you know born a man i would expect her to be great at

00:56:12.860 head but looking at her i don't feel like she is is that weird yeah enthusiastic lover yes yes it 0.99

00:56:18.780 feels like the blowjobs would be lacking yep oh no she's i don't know is she in a dude she probably 1.00

00:56:24.380 like gobbles cock she probably gobbles cock i don't know 1.00

00:56:31.420 you guys ever heard of that made-up condition women have tmj that's that literally is just an 1.00

00:56:35.900 excuse for not oh my god yeah dude my wife had a friend oh yeah oh you're your lower jaw detached

00:56:44.620 come on suck it up my wife had a friend who claimed that and it's like she was married and she would 1.00

00:56:49.180 always complain about like tmj and not suck dick for that reason but i think she ended up getting 1.00

00:56:52.460 divorced and like good sucking dick like crazy with randoms after that okay of course uh yeah yeah tmj 1.00

00:57:00.460 i'm more like tongue my johnson bitch uh i blocked big chungo all right what did you do i love big 1.00

00:57:06.460 chungo dude wonger 747 on odyssey does make a good point blair white without makeup looks like a 1.00

00:57:11.580 fucking goblin that's true do you marry blair white you're waking up to a you're waking up in the 0.99

00:57:15.980 morning and they just be like oh okay yeah i have canela harris without makeup looks awesome i'm sure 1.00

00:57:22.780 what about the porn star without makeup have you ever seen porn stars without makeup there's a video on 0.95

00:57:26.780 youtube and it's fucking hilarious yeah dude she looks a little rough but i think we're all we're 0.99

00:57:32.220 all choosing her to fuck i mean i think that's the obvious yeah i i think i think the problem is like 1.00

00:57:36.940 you would well some of y'all disagree but even though her pussy is all blown it's just the easiest life 1.00

00:57:42.300 after that and you have to kill blair white or you're a faggot look i already tried i already tried 1.00

00:57:46.700 dating an onlyfans chick i'm not doing it again so she only became an onlyfans chick afterwards though 1.00

00:57:52.380 you're either fucking you're either marrying or uh right i don't know you're marrying or killing 0.99

00:57:56.620 blair white so you have to mark random check your twitter i'm marrying blair done you're marrying blair 1.00

00:58:02.140 you're gonna wake up next to a dude every day for the rest of your life bro yeah kamala harris or an 0.97

00:58:06.460 onlyfans bitch that they're none of these are coming no wait whoa kamala is always away she's gonna be 1.00

00:58:13.020 like doing politician shit you don't have to worry about her you're just she's gonna be she's gonna be 1.00

00:58:17.020 back home in a year bro okay then then you have no but that tackling lunatic are you out of your 1.00

00:58:22.380 fucking mind she's gonna be all over she's gonna be getting paid speaking stuff all over the country 1.00

00:58:26.780 you get to chill at home as a stay-at-home husband and get hit in the head with a hammer every so 1.00

00:58:31.260 often dude i'm already a stay-at-home husband who cares like just cheat on you i would cheat on comma 1.00

00:58:36.620 dude you could you could marry uh you could marry blair white and be like we're never fucking 0.99

00:58:41.020 we're never sleeping in the same bed the whole reason i want to marry her is to 0.98

00:58:44.060 but it's like after the first time you're like well like when she's like by the way even when 1.00

00:58:49.900 you're married you don't want to fuck god damn no no no well you you said i was gay if i said that i 1.00

00:58:56.300 would fuck blair white so i don't know what's going on you're gay all the ways bro kamala is just 1.00

00:59:03.020 hillary and bill clinton was fucking everything that moved for years like there's no 1.00

00:59:08.220 random mike you get to meet hunter biden you get to if if you marry kamala harris you get to hang 0.99

00:59:17.900 out with hunter biden he's like hey hunter why don't you go over for the day dude bring some crack

00:59:21.900 bring some cocaine look yeah you drink some now that's how you sell something cole yeah i had no 0.86

00:59:27.740 interest in marrying kamala and now i am all the way in because i want hunter to be a bonus oh a bonus

00:59:33.500 hole oh is that is that a segue we do we do have uh we do have that article in the uh in the

00:59:38.140 spreadsheet here that is a segue do we even need to bring the article it's just that some

00:59:41.660 fucking you know thing in uk i thought it was no no no it's by cassandra yeah uh but uh the content 0.94

00:59:49.980 i believe is real yeah cervical cancer fund suggests calling vaginas bonus holes to avoid offending 1.00

00:59:56.300 transgender people they were like they were two letters away from actually calling what they actually are 0.96

01:00:02.780 the website claims using the correct language when referring to someone's gender identity is a simple

01:00:08.060 and effective way to demonstrate support and recognition if incorrect language is used without

01:00:12.060 being corrected it can cause someone to feel hurt or distress this may lead them to leave and to

01:00:16.700 eventually seek support elsewhere so you have to call them bonus holes wait what's going on with the

01:00:20.940 feet up there go up a little bit you see these feet in the top right what is that that's crazy i love i

01:00:27.180 i love it how many people do you think click on these links by the way and actually i'll be like 0.94

01:00:31.340 holy shit i do have low legs and feet that's actually uh that's justin o'donnell at pork mess 0.97

01:00:38.940 no that's the shit fat people get ten times better than what justin o'donnell you ever see like that 0.99

01:00:42.140 weird shit fat people get i forget the term for it there's a name for it where they get like super 1.00

01:00:46.060 fat and it's almost like this different type of fat you ever see the ones with the weird like 0.99

01:00:49.820 large like really large legs or something like that hey hey just google super fat people let's

01:00:55.180 just look at fat people for a little while dude um i don't want to look at this show me fat people 0.99

01:01:01.260 please thank you so so so they are actually trying to get people to call vaginas bonus holes are they 1.00

01:01:10.220 yo show the dude bottom right bottom right dude that guy that looks like ai oh he went away

01:01:15.660 yeah wait no he's where did that go he's right there to the left there he is oh yeah there he is

01:01:23.020 is that there you go that looks like ai to me that looks like toad in four and a half minutes

01:01:30.540 the that that's uh that's just kidding that's me when i was 26.

01:01:37.340 you said that you were 50 pounds in eighth grade yo yeah we gotta talk about something about something 0.96

01:01:42.780 like that look at this no no it was 59.9 that's what it was funny as shit i bet that dude makes 0.98

01:01:49.660 great jokes i feel like when you get too fat like you get like real funny and then there's a steep 0.99

01:01:54.300 drop off because you're just miserable this dude's miserable oh it's true yo real talk real talk so i 0.70

01:01:58.780 was i was one of the tiniest kids in my freshman class and i was and i i still weighed just a smidge 0.97

01:02:05.660 under 100 pounds there's no way you weighed 60 pounds well it's okay let's high school let's let's

01:02:11.420 think uh let's let's think well i i was in high school in eighth grade we've already established and

01:02:17.820 and i yeah i was in high school in eighth grade definitely not true no no that is absolutely true

01:02:25.580 he went to one of them retard schools eighth grade was in the high school in my uh 0.97

01:02:29.580 uh no my town until uh but high school starts in ninth grade i was in the high school in eighth

01:02:36.540 i understand you were in the building but can you honestly take how much high school starts

01:02:42.140 at ninth grade that's a freshman year well we're talking about when my nickname arose which was in

01:02:47.100 eighth grade i believe no that's not what i'm talking about but go ahead how much did i weigh in

01:02:51.180 ninth grade well let's well i started getting he said when you were in height when you entered high

01:02:54.780 school i started getting fatter later well i'm trying to think about this he goes like well i

01:02:59.260 entered the building when i was five years old so well then i was only 20 pounds no no no this isn't

01:03:03.740 a trick question no no when when you're in eighth grade you were considered a high schooler you were

01:03:08.060 considered a high schooler in my town even though it was eighth grade you were yeah your time's retarded 0.94

01:03:11.980 that's not real i mean like that happened if your whole town considered you a tranny that doesn't mean

01:03:17.580 you are one just because well then yeah no you might that's how it was middle school was only sixth

01:03:22.620 and seventh grade and like that's actually how that works okay all right well when i when i was

01:03:28.620 i don't know why we're even talking about this this is not good content but we know that i was not we

01:03:33.260 know that i was around like 38 pounds when i was in uh second grade second grade that's so 0.62

01:03:39.100 fucking crazy yeah mom yeah so you you only you know from second until eighth grade you put on 0.92

01:03:45.980 what's that 22 pounds i'm definitely right about the second grade weight i might be wrong about 0.99

01:03:51.580 the eighth grade weight yeah you might be about the eighth grade okay call your mom right now put on

01:03:57.500 a speaker dude this is not a good content mi6 needs to come with better cover stories i feel like toad's

01:04:03.820 mom sounds like a yenta uh my mom is my mom is not no she's not jewish she's italian i'm sure she is

01:04:10.700 you think toad's mom is like smoking hot no no toad what if i marry your your mom what do you do about 1.00

01:04:20.380 it and then you're his son then i son you totally be your son that's so great i i i i'd beat your ass 1.00

01:04:27.740 dad oh would you know speaking of you i have a genuine you better pipe down you don't talk to your 0.99

01:04:32.620 dad like that well i'm the man of the house what's the dad situation was your dad not around when you're

01:04:38.380 kid or was he he was he's still around okay all right i don't know i never heard you talk about

01:04:42.940 your dad we had a talk in the behind toad there's not much back group chat and like we literally think

01:04:48.380 i'm liking this new toad i think it literally was hate him because i had a i had to spell out to you

01:04:53.980 the social dynamics of how men like interact and then it was like it clicked you got it i realized like

01:04:59.020 i know i know i know i think he just never really like he's just that autistic that he never had anyone 0.90

01:05:04.300 break it down from like that and did your dad withhold food changed did your dad withhold food

01:05:08.860 from you no um because because your weight concerns me i feel like you may have been abused well my

01:05:15.420 parents were concerned about my weight as you know they put me on hgh because i was like so like below 0.95

01:05:21.020 the curve but still wouldn't let you out of the fucking cupboard and not and give you food my sister 1.00

01:05:26.380 isn't bad what does that mean she fucked your sister oh that's what she's saying let's cut right to the 1.00

01:05:31.340 chase stop jesus oh my god how does she even know what my sister looks like jesus christ benzo show 1.00

01:05:36.620 yeah could you could you watch that stop talking and start walking toad please thank you i'm just

01:05:42.060 what you want to she's trying to i don't know i know do it i'd rather i'd rather hear about your

01:05:47.500 escapades as a as a singer oh off that's serious no one's curious man not really look i you know what you

01:05:56.940 know what we've got enough weeks where we ignore toad's pleas to tell his stories go ahead and tell 0.63

01:06:01.980 us a fucking your best story do the nasser bit let's go play the violin song we gotta we gotta set 0.99

01:06:09.020 up the nasser bit no tell us your fucking best karaoke song you said that we would enjoy them 1.00

01:06:14.380 tell us your story fucking times here yeah you said you had a bunch of stories yeah just karaoke 0.99

01:06:18.540 stories i do wine homeboy well and what i'll say is before he goes he said i am did he not say he was 0.97

01:06:25.900 like i'm well known in the boston karaoke scene is that what he said he said he said new york

01:06:31.500 houston vegas he just started those are cities that i've done karaoke and i'm yeah and you're 0.76

01:06:38.380 like you're like bitch i'm world renowned i was like you ain't pitbull relax dude i'm 1.00

01:06:43.100 worldwide up in here well dude i've i mean i've i've been doing singing for like as long as i can 0.98

01:06:48.380 remember basically i've been in singing yeah i've been in singing groups uh yeah like all throughout

01:06:53.660 school whatever like i was in uh like all the different choirs acapella groups uh like 0.87

01:06:59.260 audition choirs all that shit high school college whatever wild you never got laid i was in the 0.95

01:07:04.220 men's glee club in college uh dude the men the men's glee club we're slaying poon brother we uh 1.00

01:07:10.140 yes oh no you weren't yeah don't stop let him go no no just let him go just let him go 0.92

01:07:16.300 this guy named jeff he touched two whole boobs dude no dude the men's the men's the men's glee club 0.82

01:07:21.740 i've i've said this i've said this before on the show the men's glee club we we would go uh 0.66

01:07:27.820 perform at women's only colleges and they would be like waiting for us to get off the bus and like 1.00

01:07:32.620 hounding us we really actually caught a whiff of pussy one time yeah they were just they were just 1.00

01:07:37.180 looking for dick man so oh yeah like you're like no waiting for marriage well yeah then of course you 1.00

01:07:44.460 know in high school i was in like four different bands i have i have my yeah cockapella that was my 0.99

01:07:49.980 uh my gay uh acapella group that i was in we um no so i've been in like some actual like bands

01:07:57.100 as well like look this is a great karaoke great autobiography i want you to cut to the 0.99

01:08:02.700 motherfucking chase you said you had a funny story lay it on me motherfucker yeah okay yeah so make me 0.99

01:08:08.380 laugh karaoke as we know i've been doing karaoke for for years i would i would be doing it like once 1.00

01:08:14.620 twice a week pretty much in boston well known at this club uh the club that i would go to all the

01:08:19.740 time which is now defunct because of covid i would go dude i was none of these details matter

01:08:24.940 it's incredible i'm sorry i'm autistic i was not exactly this is exactly what he typed to us 0.94

01:08:30.300 before we rudely shut him down dude i was i was a i was a motherfucking king at this club man 0.98

01:08:36.380 exactly everybody yeah that's how you start the story go ahead yeah dude everybody loved this 0.98

01:08:40.140 shit like toad yeah toad coming to the stage i do like i was blocking i had to block it i couldn't 0.98

01:08:46.140 it uh andrew and armor of god no no no so this was this was not a this was not a gay club but not 0.98

01:08:54.220 touch me this was this was not a gay club but i i did karaoke it was it was pulse in orleans

01:09:02.620 it's it's named it's named pulse for uh the throbbing cocks um no i i did i did once do karaoke at a 0.78

01:09:10.700 gay bar in boston and i and i did the song gay bar by electric six and all these men loved the song 0.94

01:09:17.340 they're all over me gay gay men hit on me a lot i was drugged that night so so that's a segue into this 0.92

01:09:25.740 so technically i'm not a segue into the most ridiculous karaoke story um one night i was doing 0.99

01:09:32.220 karaoke at the club that i was at i had whatever done a couple of songs whatever i caught the attention of

01:09:37.660 these older women two of them one one of them was like really like pretty attractive like this woman 1.00

01:09:44.700 was definitely hot for like 50 like so so so no so what i did was so you know how you play you know

01:09:53.580 you play this game when you're dealing with two women you go after the uglier of the two to make the 1.00

01:09:58.300 hotter one jealous that's the dumbest fucking shit i ever heard so that's what i was doing so that's what i 1.00

01:10:03.180 i was doing to do that that's what i was doing i was i was hitting on the the less attractive you 1.00

01:10:07.820 were leaping on the grenade yes i know dancing with this woman whatever yeah well she was round like 1.00

01:10:11.980 a grenade i was i was yes this story's about to blow up like one i was dancing with her or whatever and

01:10:19.500 and these two women also happened to be with a young man who was younger than i was like i was

01:10:24.460 in my early 30s probably when this happened both women were like early 50s i would say something like 1.00

01:10:30.780 that they're with this they were with this man who was like in his 20s obviously a gay man i'm like

01:10:35.820 all right like this is one of their moms whatever he's we're all like doing you know we're all taking

01:10:41.340 our turn so it's been five minutes all right by the way why this is all happening i'm just scrolling

01:10:46.060 through toad's facebook photos and it's hilarious like watching this here he came and then what

01:10:51.660 okay okay okay i think i found his acapella group man it's like it's uh you you it's interesting

01:10:58.460 hey don't pull it up don't pull it up i'm not pulling it up i'm just don't dox me you probably

01:11:02.460 yeah there are pictures i'm not gonna do that i'm not gonna do that there are pictures of my acapella

01:11:05.820 group i had like a big like rap solo and there's a toe dressed up as uh hey when you're done with

01:11:11.100 this fucking awfully long story i want you to i want you to hit us with that rap but go ahead uh i don't 0.98

01:11:16.140 even fucking remember it and well and and it would do it would dox me because it was literally about 0.93

01:11:21.420 my uh acapella group no let me finish this story so let me finish the story so dude i this was before 0.94

01:11:28.700 i was sober i was drinking we're all drinking i'm like all right like i'm thinking like i'm gonna like

01:11:33.580 get out of here i'm gonna try to like go home with like both of these women like let's let's try this 1.00

01:11:38.780 out yeah you're going zero to a hundred digger real quick yeah 200 it's like yeah so what what

01:11:46.940 what makes you what gives you the audacity you think you're prepared for two women you never had

01:11:51.500 the less attractive the less attractive one was like totally all over me and then i kind of had my

01:11:56.380 arm around the other one you know what i mean so i'm like so basically because you don't commit to

01:12:00.380 the ugly you get none but i'm doing the shift well it's worse than that because then what happened was

01:12:05.740 the the hotter of the two basically wound up uh being like uh like pretty much being like

01:12:13.420 no no no that like that's not what we're here for uh do you want to go home with my son she was 0.99

01:12:24.460 this story could have been told like two minutes i went to a karaoke bar once i was hit on some older

01:12:29.340 ladies thought i was really gonna make some moves and then they came to come to find out they were 1.00

01:12:33.500 trying to pass me off to the gay son i just heard your whole story granted granted it's a low bar

01:12:37.260 but top i'm gonna meet you to hit the button a third time how could we what do i need the detail

01:12:44.620 toad with a banger he did it he did it three bangers i actually like this idea we call it

01:12:51.180 toad story toad story hour because that joke being obviously it takes me i like this idea how can we

01:12:57.420 how can we get him on kill tony to tell literally just go to austin on a monday night

01:13:01.900 do you put him in the in the bucket and just hope yo we should he would get the buzzer before

01:13:06.860 he gets to the point yo two minutes one minute you get one minute so he wouldn't even make he'd be

01:13:13.900 like he'd be just just laying down the foundation like that one guy that's like well i'm getting let

01:13:21.260 me just let me and then they like he is like okay well maybe i'll let you like he grants them 0.84

01:13:25.100 give him the point and then he's still like what the fuck if if you if you tell me beforehand uh 0.84

01:13:32.140 that i'm only gonna have a minute i will condense the story okay into what like 20 minutes for now 0.89

01:13:38.940 until all infinity put a timer one minute like for the rest yeah just just imagine that in perpetuity

01:13:45.740 you have one minute it might actually curtail your severe autism yeah toad story time is a good idea

01:13:51.820 it's a good segment for the show but we were talking about how weird like this show is so toad

01:13:55.900 heavy and he's right if he like left or when he eventually you know yeah we're gonna have no

01:14:01.820 content well we always have a million times but never touching them because we get like toad says

01:14:06.380 something crazy and we're like we can't not address this look here's the truth here's the truth toad is

01:14:10.620 the most important part of the show and also we'd be absolutely hysterical hey i just said it's not 0.97

01:14:15.740 i watch every time also benzo said toad would be the guy to fucking go to like kill tony in texas 0.95

01:14:24.060 and not hit her up at all he would just be down there just like you get laid for the real the first 0.98

01:14:29.020 time go to texas and he just does kill tony and get made fun of for an hour and that's it 0.94

01:14:34.060 no no no what would happen was what would happen would be i i would i would go on kill i would go on 0.99

01:14:41.660 kill tony and i would kill so hard that i would some other bitch and then i wouldn't have to call 1.00

01:14:45.900 benzo as you know conventional logic says if you do have to a gay one to get to the hot woman you 1.00

01:14:51.100 got to do what you gotta do i just don't pick up artist logic right here you guys have they have

01:14:57.020 like a relationship right like like what what is going on why is there no consummation what is

01:15:02.140 like you guys are like totally broken she's obviously down so like what's your problem yeah she's a

01:15:06.860 crackhead like so she's down what are you doing for the for the thousand times she's not on benzos 0.97

01:15:13.260 yeah she's she's on cream pie city she's a little bit older too you can do whatever yeah we don't 0.98

01:15:18.460 need to crowdfund them we can get them down oh we could get them down there this next monday well

01:15:22.460 this is the other thing i i dude i autistically uh tell benzo about all of my betting so so yeah benzo

01:15:29.420 is uh following like all my betting so she kind of knows like what i'm winning in that total if we give

01:15:34.780 you we give you a month can you put together you toad toad we give you a month no no toad i want

01:15:40.220 to be serious about this we give you one month to pull together a one minute set would you go down

01:15:45.500 to kill tony yeah you would go down i will go down pull like a tim cast move where he dropped that 0.82

01:15:51.660 monster super chat do all this and then not get pulled up did you i think i think we would we would 0.96

01:15:57.740 have to because i know after like if people are asking for it he doesn't pull the name out of the

01:16:02.780 hat we'd have to call dave smith we'd have to call dave smith and we'd have to have him call tony

01:16:07.820 hinchcliffe and be like can you please get toad on this show we're flying down specifically for this

01:16:12.140 and i feel like we could that's attainable i think the move would be to oh that's great send a bunch

01:16:16.460 of other people and then flood with other people just putting toad in the hat oh that's a great idea

01:16:21.740 i don't even know who's going we just put toad's name in that five times how about what what if we

01:16:27.820 like mail-in voting we just put in mail-in ballots right into the hat hey hey that didn't happen

01:16:33.340 this is youtube no it'd be great if they pull if they pull his name twice because we put it in there

01:16:37.420 so you gotta tell a second story he's got no he's got no material left he just goes up there like

01:16:43.980 dude you you know you don't tell stories though right you tell you you do stand up it's a minute

01:16:49.820 set bro it's basically a stand up people do tell stories but like you do it's like a quick story

01:16:55.020 the joke he told was pretty good would you want to tell it here i'm not going to end the show i

01:16:57.980 promise it's still too early yeah well i was i was i was trying to tell it on that uh stream and uh

01:17:03.900 yeah one of our best bits it's my favorite bit that we do by the way it is but we're not going to

01:17:10.220 end the show so go ahead what what bit this is a bit yeah your joke do the set i want to end the

01:17:15.500 show so bad but no don't don't don't yeah no i love this dude well do you i sent you a video

01:17:20.540 tell the joke do you not do you not have a video of it the video i'd rather if we're doing videos of

01:17:25.740 us i'd rather do the one of our jokes about that we did for the love of god every time we give you

01:17:29.900 an opportunity to shine you just you just tell the jokes don't you just don't shine i just want 0.99

01:17:34.220 you to shine just shine motherfucker shine we're giving you your chance right now 0.99

01:17:37.420 deep madness because he won't wait back at him you you had some critiques that would be really 0.99

01:17:41.020 funny you had some critiques too bad as we blind so we're going the opposite way we're giving you

01:17:46.940 your moment to shine and you're what are we doing i always shine baby goes back on the show this 0.99

01:17:52.540 motherfucker didn't even say hi to me especially with my bald head i'm always shining i want to hear 0.98

01:17:57.340 this joke i didn't hear it on the i didn't hear this i genuinely want to hear this joke i'll tell you the truth 0.98

01:18:01.740 just tell a joke toad is mad that i didn't pick him for like my third option to go on the elijah

01:18:07.100 shafer show but you are my first option to go on legion of skanks and there's only one other seat 0.97

01:18:13.420 yeah but yeah but i'm going on the redo all right no like you would be the first person it would be me

01:18:19.100 no the redo on uh shape yeah bro that's not what we're talking about depends how i feel depends how

01:18:24.060 i feel tell the joke tell the tell the joke or you're not gonna go all right well just like

01:18:31.340 well i got i gotta get it right man but um so i i have this new neighbor and she's like the most

01:18:39.100 beautiful woman that i've ever seen man she has the most incredible eyes and every time i look at them 0.97

01:18:47.260 it's just like i'm staring through a window right into her bedroom

01:18:56.300 i love that his his his style is to be a creepy

01:19:04.300 what the is that that's gonna be your character all the time it works if he did have if he had five

01:19:11.260 minutes like to do like a like a five minute spot i feel like him telling a boring story but ending it

01:19:16.220 with a really good creepy joke out of nowhere would be no no i i i use that as my closer in

01:19:22.460 a couple of the sets if you could tighten if you could tighten it up and just do like a five minute

01:19:26.540 set i know it one minute one minute of you hitting two of you hitting two punches that's obviously your

01:19:33.740 closer i think i think it's i think it's a minute that might get you an applause you have to open up with

01:19:40.300 i'm a virgin and then tell the story about that and then perfect yeah well yeah well yeah oh tony

01:19:45.580 would go oh god he would love it oh yeah but yeah but one of the one of the openers that i've used

01:19:51.100 though is uh is is uh my ex-girlfriend used to really like to role play and she thought it would be

01:19:57.900 really hot if i was a cop so i shot her dog i don't like that you don't like that one i've heard 0.52

01:20:05.260 that too political yeah do we need like by the way i don't want to skip over this uh lady said she 0.88

01:20:11.740 she he has danny brown's number um yo which is laney crazy to me i've get i'm is danny brown into 0.95

01:20:19.500 like fucking trannies who's danny who's danny brown that'd be awesome you don't know who danny brown is 1.00

01:20:24.380 no that's the one that was married to whitney houston yo no he's funny bro he's funny he has a show on 0.99

01:20:30.700 ymh but he's also he's a he did a bunch of rap too yeah dope rapper he's sick yo laney for real 1.00

01:20:37.900 i'll call you she forever if you get him i will suck your lady dick 1.00

01:20:47.260 yeah i think the threesome story would be a great story it would be hard no that's when you're 1.00

01:20:51.660 invited back on that's not the first that would be yeah that would be hey by the way that would be 0.99

01:20:55.500 mine fuck you if i'm going on there i'm telling the threesome story would be a legion of skank 1.00

01:21:00.220 story like the way he told it to us i listen to it often and man it's the the way you laid that 0.99

01:21:05.740 one out it couldn't have been more funny so that one worked all right i thought i was too autistic

01:21:11.900 with that one too and like setting it up you know you know why you know why that story worked perfectly

01:21:16.620 is because you were embarrassed to tell it so you were succinct you were succinct and he was dragged

01:21:22.300 out you do with all your other stories yeah we had to drag out all the information out of you okay

01:21:29.020 yeah you the way you were tiptoeing around to be careful to say this but not that

01:21:33.100 that's what really made the story awesome because we could sense your awkwardness your natural

01:21:37.260 awkwardness i love that yo eric john pizza artist said i'm not kidding he would use the whole minute

01:21:43.260 to be like i'm down on the brewers because they're in a bad spot right now and i really i bet the over

01:21:46.860 because that that that doesn't even make sense to me benzo obviously does not she's not learning man 0.95

01:21:55.660 she's not learning from from what you know why because she ain't reading your fucking long 1.00

01:21:59.100 diatribes about sports betting just like we don't yeah he says like this like massive wall script and 1.00

01:22:03.740 she's just like when are you gonna fuck my pussy 1.00

01:22:08.380 she's just like and here's another nude and here's another dude and he's just like oh i'm down 1.00

01:22:12.300 thirty thousand dollars this week she'd be like you know what's crazy my pussy is still wet after you 1.00

01:22:17.900 get all that shit and you see dude there's there's something there's something wrong with her 1.00

01:22:23.340 yeah clearly she wants to fuck something wrong with you do it no no no no no no there's something 1.00

01:22:27.260 wrong with you you're not hopping on a plane and taking all of your baggage everything you're 1.00

01:22:33.180 balling like a motherfucker fly this woman out and just treat her wine dine bam kick her out 1.00

01:22:39.420 bring her bring her to your home dude i'd do it like i'd have to all right no you what hey you can't 1.00

01:22:44.220 that's an invite he'll he'll never say it in the in the group chat but fucking take that as an 0.95

01:22:50.700 invite he's inviting you say yes in the chat right now no no she's not gonna do it book a ticket and 0.89

01:22:56.460 then just send him a paypal request and he has to just be like just be like hey whether she comes

01:23:01.740 or not toad i want you to fucking pay paypal her a thousand dollars good luck toad dude she never 1.00

01:23:08.620 leaves um whatever the fuck the middle of nowhere like texas wherever the fuck she is he 1.00

01:23:13.980 would for that dick and you know it all right all right some toad benzo would you leave just 1.00

01:23:18.060 say yes or no in the chat right now i'll pull it up if you say yes then then you guys about to 1.00

01:23:22.220 fuck i'm excited you said if you say yes my god my god if you could uh if you could film that toad 1.00

01:23:28.700 that'd be great yo if you film it and you play it on the show fuck no no no that's local that's 1.00

01:23:33.420 locals content locals content oh obviously okay you gotta pay for that we gotta paywall that 0.98

01:23:40.700 shit i was saying in the chat that the the explicit focus of this show is not to like like create good 0.99

01:23:46.380 content anymore oh she didn't say anything fuck it damn it whatever fuck it's it's not to create 0.99

01:23:50.860 good content it's not to make you guys laugh i don't give a fuck about you guys it's specifically 1.00

01:23:55.020 to turn toad into a sex symbol if within like the next couple of years i don't care if we have a 0.98

01:24:00.140 million like subscribers or whatever if we will toad it's already i don't even give a fuck if we 0.99

01:24:05.020 can get him specifically like when women see him they just get wet they don't know why they associate 0.97

01:24:09.820 him with sex yeah that's what i want this show to be that's the most that's what needs to happen uh eric

01:24:19.740 that was so great that's what needs to happen eric is way eric is way off by the way that 0.82

01:24:25.980 uh benzo could be a sex symbol like the swastika is a peace symbol by the way ben benzo is uh 38 so 0.99

01:24:32.540 fuck you hey hey so how long do you think you'd last the first go i think there's a lot of there's 0.99

01:24:40.300 a lot of dynamics to this by the way yeah i feel like you may last forever i feel like you may not 1.00

01:24:44.380 come at all a lot of possibilities oh that's true it could be he's already there thank you junkie

01:24:50.460 jeff great point great direction trust dark says trust me when he's in that zone he could pull most 0.99

01:24:55.420 pussy yeah i like it i don't think it's like i i think if there's supposed to be a done there that's 0.99

01:25:01.180 great but there's not i just feel like it's just funny to think he's like he could pull like most 0.99

01:25:04.700 pussy like not like high-end pussy but like you know i think he just means most as in like i don't 0.99

01:25:09.660 understand how you fail it's like 60 of the the women you have this 51 behind you you got random who's 0.99

01:25:17.100 willing to wingman you like directly into oh there's no way that you don't get it i don't

01:25:23.100 random would that gay dude for you we have an elite stand-up comic and future school shooter in 0.98

01:25:28.300 the chat right now willing to help you write your set once you get on kill tony it's kill 0.99

01:25:32.700 pussy time you know i'm just i invited him i invited him on the show mid-show and he he just messaged me 0.95

01:25:37.180 back he's like no i'm like way too up to hop on dude i don't even respect dude i i i don't even 0.98

01:25:42.540 fucking need any of this help man uh told you 38 i think you might i honestly don't 0.94

01:25:47.980 encouragement i don't think he does i i i don't think he needs the help i think okay any man can 1.00

01:25:53.900 get pussy it's not like like it's really the pussy you want i guess yeah yeah he could legit trip and 1.00

01:26:03.900 fall into pussy google fucking whores nearby and you can get fucking yeah exactly there are single 1.00

01:26:12.460 mothers ready to fuck in your area toad oh i oh i'm aware yeah dude dude the single mothers i 1.00

01:26:21.580 love them and they love me so we got we got any other stuff any other yeah i wanted i really wanted 0.99

01:26:27.900 to do the the videos because i really wanted this to be a bit which video is this the anti-comedy uh 0.77

01:26:33.900 oh you're a nigger bit oh i love that one that was the other version was whack hey how about a 1.00

01:26:41.020 spoiler alert for our audience jose yeah that killed it that was my whole punchline yeah i didn't think 0.99

01:26:46.620 you're actually gonna play that but that that kind of ruined it yeah all right oh yeah oh the ice

01:26:52.620 yusuf who's a elite ufc fighter says just found out white people he says fine because he's black

01:26:58.780 find out white people don't wash their ice cubes before putting it in i drink scroll down he has a 0.52

01:27:06.540 video he has a video i don't even know i think i think it's he literally probably found out the

01:27:11.020 chicken washing thing he's just having fun yeah is he messing with us is he messing with us yeah he's

01:27:15.900 totally messing with you he responded to me oh yeah dude dude he's coming on tower game bro yeah

01:27:25.020 what did jake shields say to him what did jake shields say to him scroll up maybe the fancy whites

01:27:31.740 but definitely not us trailer whites we do chase beers or bears and swim with sharks though you're 0.97

01:27:36.860 worse at reading than i am all right he's got to be around he's got to be yeah yeah if black people 0.96

01:27:41.420 start washing their ice i'm done i'm out but it makes sense though it makes no sense because 0.98

01:27:47.420 dude the ice is already water and you're putting more water on it all you're doing is like slowly

01:27:51.660 melting the ice with the dirt the dirt layer if you think that there is a dirt layer on the outside

01:27:56.700 of the ice you're dissolving that and then putting it just yesterday just yesterday yeah this is this

01:28:03.820 is tower gang spreading culture right here it says be me talking to co-workers at the office

01:28:08.940 mentioning a new chicken recipe and how to prepare it quote anon you don't wash your chicken the

01:28:14.300 did i just ask dot jpeg you're not supposed to wash chicken everyone around the office looks at 0.99

01:28:20.060 at me in shock starts by working with black people anon he works everyone taking this dumb 0.97

01:28:26.780 side admitting they wash their chicken stutter out that all the good gets washed off and the meat 0.99

01:28:32.780 is clean because factories bleach etc yeah but you have to wash off the gross white slimy stuff 1.00

01:28:39.500 that's the fat dot mp4 spend spend the rest of the night asking co-workers if they wash their chicken

01:28:45.740 everyone says they do go home take out two frozen thighs wash them they taste like plain 0.99

01:28:51.180 shit afterwards did i just get did i just get trolled or do retards really clean off meat no black 0.99

01:28:57.100 people well yes retards yeah meat cuts it says i i do love that we've we've made it we've made it to 1.00

01:29:04.220 fucking uh 4chan it's the best 4chan made it to reddit that's right it's just the truth black people 0.99

01:29:11.180 will be washing their chicken and no one knows why including the black people speaking of we should 1.00

01:29:15.500 probably play uh as an outro the fucking uh the outro jose just leave if you want to i'm not saying 0.99

01:29:22.060 right now i'm not saying right now i'm good i'm good do you do you think this did this whole thing 0.98

01:29:26.460 start as a troll but then become real because the black people actually trolled themselves real i i feel 0.98

01:29:31.740 like i vaguely had heard of this before like flat earth here uh little dicky play that play the video i 0.94

01:29:36.620 sent in the chat yeah god i just i love that black people do that jose's oh he is trying to always 0.92

01:29:44.140 trying to end it i wasn't trying i saying when we do it could be 20 minutes from now i'm saying

01:29:47.980 when we do it's going to get to the last 30 minutes to get good yeah yeah we're just we're just ramping

01:29:55.260 up until the video comes up that's right we're revving up just like toad's sex days are revving up

01:30:02.780 right in front of our very oh yeah you know it all right here we go yeah my dad left after my mom

01:30:09.020 refused to wash the chicken with dawn's soap that's a good one oh dude whoever's making this sketch

01:30:15.740 you gotta include this for uh the tower gang boys

01:30:20.380 mother did you just make chicken without washing it with dawn's soap we all gonna get samabella

01:30:27.100 why are you using dawn's soap doesn't that the chicken dawn's soap on the chicken if you don't 1.00

01:30:33.980 you don't you don't you get samabella you get samabella on that motherfucker and then you 1.00

01:30:37.820 shit out of your mouth that's called cukin what do you mean shit out your mouth you 1.00

01:30:42.700 shit out of your motherfucking mouth if you don't you don't show up you get samabella 1.00

01:30:51.740 oh my god oh it's the fucking best man dude i love that guy so much i can't believe 1.00

01:30:57.900 dude for a minute i thought i thought samabella was uh like some black holiday or something 0.98

01:31:04.380 did you really not get the joke no i got it okay i was like does he get it i don't

01:31:09.740 do you have to explain it no you do not have to explain it i already explained it many times to

01:31:15.980 myself in my head that that joke has so many layers you know taking the whole ebonics angle on

01:31:21.900 salmonella it's just like a south park bit i feel like because he's he's a writer right that's what

01:31:37.100 he did before well he was yeah he's everything actor writer comic everything yeah when i when i

01:31:42.860 listen to some of his bits i'm like i picture it in south park i was like this would kill man

01:31:46.860 you know i've never watched an episode of south park never wow you never actually have

01:31:51.500 tower gang either why i never watched south park what are you doing what are you doing you gotta

01:31:56.380 do it you gotta do it i've never watched south park and i've never watched uh an episode of the

01:32:01.260 simpsons what oh man yeah i don't like the simpsons either well i'm saying i've never seen one episode

01:32:07.740 oh the simpsons back in the day man it was so good the only one of the only one of those like

01:32:12.380 ones like that is i've watched family guy that's about it i never watched you know you can watch

01:32:15.660 south park like while you're giving plasma like you just play it on your phone for sure i mean i

01:32:20.220 just i it was never like i it was i i think i missed the window of where it would be like super

01:32:27.740 funny for me of like no no absolutely not of like 16 no but i'm saying like when you get into it you

01:32:34.460 want to get you missed the you missed your peak of funny correct but it's still funny like when you're 0.79

01:32:38.220 like 14 to 18 no you're right like you you're really want like the fucking still funny i promise you 0.95

01:32:45.420 yeah it's it is still hilarious yeah i understand that but i feel like i feel like i'm way too far

01:32:51.020 behind like i can't like you don't have to catch up chronological narrative here they're

01:32:56.300 fucking in fourth grade i mean i was like i watched the nfl i watched them i've watched in the first 0.86

01:33:00.700 season you know back in 1942 and i watched you know i watched it chronologically i gotta catch up 0.99

01:33:08.140 couldn't figure out what was going on otherwise he's like why are they playing

01:33:10.620 yeah hitting each other there's new whoa i mean i'm in season like 42 and there's way too many

01:33:18.300 teams yeah yeah what's going on i want to nfl and the afl merged what it would actually be really

01:33:24.540 funny if someone actually go back and like watch like sports like that like they do shows just go

01:33:29.740 back to the nba or baseball baseball started like the 1800s like i gotta start back and really for 162 games 0.98

01:33:37.580 times 150 years times times 30 teams bro you are talking the rest of your motherfucking life you're 0.98

01:33:44.540 watching those games you could just watch ken burns god i'm getting i'm getting almost rolled in the 0.98

01:33:48.380 fucking uh the comments for uh not having watched south park yeah it's great and it's a lot of them 0.99

01:33:54.460 too are like commentaries on the shit that's going on as well in a certain way it's like the dumbest 0.99

01:33:58.140 but then at that point is it like those things where there's shows and like i guess it's like other tv 0.97

01:34:04.460 shows where there's things about times and it's like i'm not gonna get the joke because

01:34:08.220 i don't know you'll get it like it's it's 10 years old now like during like the era of trump like

01:34:12.380 there were some hilarious ones that were doing that were really no i thought that was that was

01:34:15.660 the worst that was the worst south park i don't know i didn't watch all of them but i remember

01:34:18.940 someone pretty goddamn funny mr garrison mark mark goes to stills and sits down he's like oh 0.59

01:34:24.860 shit it's eight o'clock it's he watches it with commercials incredible dude i a bowl of cocaine dude 0.95

01:34:30.940 i i watched i watched every simpsons episode up until like a couple years ago and i haven't 0.96

01:34:35.260 caught up i haven't seen a commercial in 25 years it's why i don't watch the commercials it

01:34:40.300 it it simpsons when you go back and you do watch something like usually it's at your parents house

01:34:45.340 because they just haven't figured out like i don't know yeah so they're just like they're still

01:34:50.460 turning on comcast to watch my my stepdad watches the padres games live every day and it makes

01:34:56.300 me want to strangle him it drives me crazy commercials are so terrible i mean just what

01:35:02.700 like the only time i get them is whenever like i'll watch hulu but with that with the ads

01:35:07.660 what makes you more mad when your stepdad watches the live padres or when he your mom

01:35:12.700 they got divorced a while ago thanks for bringing that up though

01:35:18.220 cool what i what i will say though is that uh south park wow south park for the first like

01:35:23.740 several seasons at least i would say they weren't really doing like current event stuff it was more 0.94

01:35:28.300 just like the characters were doing like a bunch of really stupid and whatever so like 0.98

01:35:35.660 oh my god you just have to watch 1500 hours of football per day and you can 0.96

01:35:41.260 catch up with the entire yeah there you go by 24. he already divided by 24. he did

01:35:47.100 oh wait what so that's 365 so it's every day you have to watch 1500 hours yeah but yeah dude you

01:35:55.500 you could you could do it you could do it if you really speed it up oh that's true it's like well

01:36:01.820 these blackboard insanely fast holy they are moving all right you speed you speed it up to like

01:36:09.980 fucking uh like 10 times speed and the white guys are still slow it's like what the math does not okay i 0.94

01:36:16.540 guess they're mine because you have multiple you all right you have multiple games per whatever so 0.99

01:36:20.060 all right that makes sense now that's still not imagine imagine the aliens that conquer us and they

01:36:24.460 have to like go there's one guy that's in charge of like watching all our media and they're like here

01:36:28.300 you watch 1500 years of football and this alien is like oh my goodness 0.96

01:36:35.980 17 380 games jesus christ well you know it's crazy like uh if you think about it if you had

01:36:43.660 watch all media like just on youtube they upload like not that many when you think about it 17 000

01:36:49.660 games you think they'd be more thousand a lot dog yeah it's a lot yeah they only played 16 games a year

01:36:55.500 now do baseball yeah baseball is crazy i think the math got if that's how many games there are and we

01:37:01.180 were saying it was gonna take like that many years that doesn't add up something so baseball baseball

01:37:05.900 plays 10 times as many games per season and they've been around for twice as long so that the math is

01:37:11.340 real easy there that's and their and their games and their games on average are much longer as well

01:37:16.860 i remember watching one not anymore i was watching the mets and the red sox play i think it was done

01:37:21.660 it was like i was in like high school or something and they went into so many extra innings that when

01:37:25.260 i woke up they were still playing i woke up oh yeah oh yeah that was yeah one of the like longest

01:37:29.580 games in history yeah yeah that's why that's what i remember that so baseball i think they fixed it

01:37:35.820 they fixed it now they barely go past like 10 innings if my math is right i think it's about

01:37:40.620 320 000 games that you'd have to watch times three hours that's a million that's a million folks that's

01:37:46.300 a lot a million hours yeah of baseball of the most boring sport

01:37:53.260 just like it's like it's like listening to toad tell a story

01:37:55.580 what if we had a baseball commentator just like like color commentary uh toad stories

01:38:10.140 i guess he's going oh and he struck out once again

01:38:15.260 stand up for the seventh inning he is he is now oh for 32

01:38:19.580 dude i should well that's a shame cole he should really work on his game in the off season

01:38:24.940 i thought about it back in the day i know it would shock you that i was like obsessed with

01:38:28.460 baseball statistics back in the day and it was yeah like i i kind of wanted to be a baseball

01:38:33.260 commentator or some kind oh god i 6.34 years you can if you don't sleep

01:38:40.780 you can watch every football game i love football i know everything i know everything why the prevent

01:38:48.860 defense why are you running prevent again this is how you always lose the part is that like after

01:38:53.740 you watch that in six and a half years then you have to watch the six and a half years that you missed

01:38:59.020 oh that's true it's constant job it's just you gotta catch back up oh my god it's like that

01:39:04.060 spinning top 218 000 play games so insane all right we try to get away from the autistic on this 1.00

01:39:11.740 show but we're really leaning into with these numbers here yeah this is getting yeah i don't

01:39:15.900 know why this is so fascinating to me but i do i do just want to uh trigger toad and apparently benzo

01:39:21.340 uh the pitch clock is a good idea and should be implemented further make it look benzo is correct

01:39:26.620 we should have a we should have a clock for toad when he starts a story he's just like the 0.98

01:39:30.140 bitch clock started up oh i thought i thought it was gonna be the tally of how many bitches i 1.00

01:39:35.580 fuck it would always be on zero when you talk like that it makes me so mad this is what i mean 1.00

01:39:42.780 we try not to but it's like it's just because if you're if your counter is at zero what do you want 0.99

01:39:48.460 me to do am i will say one of the one of my favorite podcasts every day which ever never got released

01:39:54.060 was doing the uh the sporkle uh sports quizzes you know oh yeah yeah yeah i remember it's like it's

01:40:01.660 like okay name like every first round draft pick uh for the past 30 years so you have to go through

01:40:08.940 just like for like the nba and that shit is so much fun if you get a bunch of like sports buddies

01:40:13.420 together you just start naming names it's i don't know it's really fun if you like sports jose's not 0.94

01:40:18.220 gonna get it but like get it either that's i dude i i i used to love that shit it's really fun 0.75

01:40:23.900 like like click you you could do that though for like with like baseball or like basketball be like

01:40:28.700 all right i could do like with all number one draft picked or like or like name like oh no no no i

01:40:32.860 thought i thought you're saying can i name all the teams in every i could name all yeah it is that but

01:40:36.380 then it goes like they have to be like name like the past all the champions for like the nba that

01:40:41.340 couldn't do it yeah i mean i could i could get like close like i know it's like lakers lakers spurs

01:40:46.380 spurs like it's late celtics in there because they fucking rob us and then the you got the uh 0.98

01:40:53.260 not the sixers the bulls no no no the detroit pistons the pistons yeah the bull the bulls are in there 0.95

01:40:59.580 yeah oh i'm not going all the way early yeah oh but i bet early 2000s uh would be clint's like 0.97

01:41:05.180 fucking yeah that's my bread basket just crazy every all the sports made 2000s goes goes lakers 0.68

01:41:11.340 lakers lakers pistons and then i think it's spurs spurs the lakers don't win for a while after that 0.98

01:41:16.940 it's like five years dude this is sorry yeah we need a sports podcast again just to do this

01:41:22.460 right start your sports podcast dude i've been saying i've been saying we should do it man but

01:41:27.580 i also want to do we should definitely do a sports podcast

01:41:33.580 clint i'm gonna get with you we're gonna no no you have to do the conspiracy podcast with top of that

01:41:37.900 yeah i mean it's true how much will elizabeth allow hey hey i want to i want to talk a little

01:41:43.820 bit about this fucking this uh this mountain at the north pole because this has me what no yeah 0.98

01:41:50.860 yeah this shit has me spun up dude like see i don't i don't believe this i want i just watched top 0.99

01:41:55.740 gear last week uh and they went to the north pole i love that yeah great it's a good episode and 0.99

01:42:01.500 there was no mountain there no no there was no mountain and they now they did go to the

01:42:07.340 gravitational north pole and not necessarily the uh geographical north pole right what's that what's

01:42:12.860 that mean they went to where the magnetic north they went to magnetic north

01:42:18.300 is geographic north i thought it was i thought it was one of the same they're different no it moves 0.99

01:42:23.820 my life is upside down right now you just fucking you know what's even crazier so that that mountain 0.99

01:42:29.500 there it's called like a black black mountain but it's called black rock dog black rock it's all 0.99

01:42:35.180 it's all interconnected baby yes it has four it has four rivers that flow from it and it's like

01:42:40.300 associated with a biblical verse and the way the rivers flow they turn into a nazi sign that's a sign 0.70

01:42:46.700 of peace no way yeah dude geographic north pole and the magnetic north are way off from one another

01:42:54.940 my whole life and it gets further every year dude that's how far away i am yeah you get further

01:43:01.180 from god every day i bet every i bet everyone watching this right now had no top other pictures

01:43:06.540 of this uh this mountain uh there's not that's the whole issue there's no pictures there but there's

01:43:14.060 old drawings because the the way we know it's there is because there's no pictures of it cole use your

01:43:20.140 brain for a second dude yeah you can't take pictures of uh santa's workshop man no on on like

01:43:26.060 old maps on old maps they drew the north pole i'm sending it in the chat right now a little bit yeah

01:43:31.100 they drew the north pole and what it is and on new maps it's like completely misrepresented and it's

01:43:36.700 true a lot a lot of old maps look like flat earth maps too the way like countries are laid out and

01:43:41.580 things like that but isn't that just because they didn't know whenever i put a piece of paper down

01:43:44.620 it looks flat to me too no man that that's that's just because that's just because they're all uh

01:43:51.340 it's because they're all i'm sorry the problem is tough is i actually believe in hollow earth

01:43:55.740 so like i i legit like i think um the lectern guy actually put up a thing he said what conspiracy

01:44:02.620 theory do you 100 like i keep it was like but you don't think it could be how he phrased it

01:44:08.700 what you don't think it could be hollow and flat i think it could be hollow and flat but i think it's

01:44:13.420 more hollow than flat here just just run like a minute i believe that there is no land at the

01:44:20.700 north pole just a bunch of ice sheets nothing to see here what if i told you that this is far from

01:44:26.540 the truth not only is the north pole home to the most exceedingly high mountain in the world i hate 0.96

01:44:31.900 this shit about tick tock it's the dudes that like just give me like over on the side just like gotta be 0.99

01:44:37.500 in the video yeah what it's ridiculous like what the fuck you're adding zero to this it'd be like 0.99

01:44:43.580 if we put on a tick tock but it's just us here on the side just going yeah we are no commentary at 0.99

01:44:50.380 all no no this shit and put out and put out this exact video as a tick tock fuck it no dude he needs a 0.99

01:44:56.700 black guy so you know that he's serious but none of us talk we just point yeah yeah it's just this 1.00

01:45:03.020 yo that shit's yeah that's the real shit right or they'll do like stupid they'll be like 1.00

01:45:09.900 all right play it we'll do it we'll do it mount zion the mountain of god which is spoken about 1.00

01:45:14.220 all throughout the bible it is also home to paradise the garden of eden which is still here to this day

01:45:20.540 now prepare for a big awakening this is one of the first ever maps created of the north pole in the 1500s

01:45:27.020 i want you to focus on the middle here you have a mountain with a river coming out of it and then

01:45:31.980 you have four rivers coming out of that river in the middle and a river went out of eden to water the

01:45:38.620 garden and from thence it was parted it became into four heads so you have the river flowing out of eden

01:45:44.940 which is directly under mount zion and you have the four rivers parting from that one big river a lot of

01:45:51.100 people think that god took the garden of eden to heaven but why would he be guarding it with

01:45:56.300 cherubims and a flaming sword if it was in heaven now back to the map that mountain in the middle it

01:46:02.380 is called the rupus nigra straight from wikipedia rupus nigra means black rock rupus nigra is a black

01:46:09.980 rock magnetic mountain located at the north pole funny how the biggest investment company in the world

01:46:15.820 is black rock all right stop they know the truth that's plenty oh my goodness that's going to be

01:46:22.140 an incredible tick tock it's going to be pointing at this guy pointing at this cool yeah i just love

01:46:28.460 i mean it's just the worst type of like content ever just be like i'm just gonna rip this other dude's 0.98

01:46:34.620 shit put it up his mind and now we're gonna rip your shit this is like the inception of content ripping 0.99

01:46:39.660 yo and now that black dude is gonna rip our shit it's gonna be what do you do you have to watch 1.00

01:46:45.500 do you have to watch like conspiracy tick tocks also three times before you believe it so it's 1.00

01:46:49.020 like you just like scroll back through like you just it just replays you go that's two if you if

01:46:54.060 i replay this one more time i'm believing this is 100 you know it's funny it's funny we started 1.00

01:46:58.940 the show off talking about a black dude ripping that girl's shit and now we're talking about a black 1.00

01:47:03.580 dude full circle oh yeah unlike her not full circle is this i don't know but happy star wars 0.98

01:47:10.860 day everyone today is also my birthday and because it's my birthday i get to introduce you to my

01:47:16.140 girlfriend who is amazing hi guys i'm britney everyone today is also my birthday and because

01:47:23.740 it's my birthday i get to introduce you to my girlfriend who is amazing today everyone today

01:47:29.500 is also my birthday and because this is when tick tock goes good to introduce you to my girlfriend 0.99

01:47:33.900 oh yeah this is my good friend everyone today is also my birthday and because it's my birthday i get

01:47:38.780 to introduce you to my girlfriend everyone today is also my birthday and because it's my birthday i get

01:47:44.780 to introduce you to my girlfriend one today is also my birthday and because it is my birthday i get to

01:47:49.180 introduce you my girlfriend every one today is also my birthday marcus you don't want to do this

01:47:58.300 Every girlfriend hostage police are outside of his home waiting negotiation terms breaking news are outside of his home waiting negotiation terms

01:48:07.900 That's really good and not really good we need to put up one and just like guy just going

01:48:14.400 That guy should be like part of the background of every tower

01:48:23.440 But this is a pretty sure that's lazy sister. No, that's just me and Elizabeth to like that's just my relationship as well play that plug music boy 1.00

01:48:30.400 Let's do it. Oh, yeah, we have

01:48:33.200 Music going on that plug so go ahead and just plug

01:48:37.200 Clint Russell host of we're like down coast

01:48:43.180 I need 300 followers per day on Twitter for me to hit a hundred K by my birthday

01:48:49.300 So make sure if you haven't followed me at Liberty like pot go do it and I'm going to the point music

01:48:58.980 Oh, yeah, thank you spaces. Oh

01:49:03.300 Oh, oh, yeah tomorrow night tomorrow night. I will be with Dave Smith debating the Krasenstein brothers on 0.97

01:49:09.220 Joe Biden's corruption is he corrupt or is he not God only knows why the Krasenstein brothers agreed to this

01:49:16.180 But I love that Dave was also like I don't know like if they said anything bad. I haven't seen that and then

01:49:25.300 These guys fucking suck 1.00

01:49:30.740 It's gonna be Josie space TRHL make sure you follow her so that we can you know clown these watch it, I guess 1.00

01:49:37.460 Oh, yeah, that's me at that's me at top lobster.com top lobster. I got some new stuff. These shirts are gonna go away soon

01:49:44.420 There was just some special this and stuff

01:49:46.740 Merch engine calm those are

01:49:48.740 We're cooking with fire over there man. So go check that out. We got some new shows. We got our boys

01:49:53.700 Revenge of the sis on there. Just go ahead and yeah, hell. Yeah, we got zaka mika. We've got fucking the live first show 1.00

01:50:00.660 We I mean, we're picking up cool people left and right 0.96

01:50:04.180 And then tomorrow I get I'll let jose handle tomorrow's plug

01:50:07.620 But friday me cole

01:50:09.620 Maybe toad if he acts right we're gonna be on the eliza schaefer show again for our redo

01:50:14.580 So hell yeah, offensive

01:50:16.820 Slightly offensive. Yeah, that's right. Oh, yeah

01:50:19.220 All right, uh, jose galison

01:50:21.220 I have the no way jose podcast

01:50:23.220 Uh, I just recently got a strike for the most ridiculous of reasons. Hell, yeah 0.77

01:50:28.740 um

01:50:29.940 Anyways, uh, we so, uh, yeah, definitely go

01:50:32.980 I just made a rumble because i've been slacking so go go follow that definitely

01:50:37.700 But tomorrow I have another four pony boys and I got a big one for you guys

01:50:42.260 I have shane cashman and the american shaman or as most people know him as these days

01:50:47.540 The the q anon shaman i also have top lobster reed supposed to show up for this one 0.62

01:50:52.980 So uh, and maybe clint will show up if they if they uh destroy the krasny scenes earlier

01:50:58.900 Than expected yeah, i'll hop over after it's done for sure. Yeah, for sure

01:51:02.820 Definitely check that out. I'll have it streaming on youtube and rumble

01:51:06.900 Uh, so because I mean, I could get nuked on youtube again. I'm cutting close

01:51:11.060 I will be putting way less content up on youtube

01:51:13.060 So go check out the rumble or start listening to me on audio and follow me on twitter at tower gang jose

01:51:17.860 Oh, yeah

01:51:18.900 toad and cole what we got

01:51:21.060 Uh, matt just asked me if I got around to finally rake my wife properly. Uh, no. Yeah

01:51:26.820 What?

01:51:27.860 That's cole's plug. I guess 1.00

01:51:31.860 So what do we got another week another non-rate talk about a failed plug

01:51:36.740 Yeah, anything toad

01:51:38.500 Tower gang toad on twitter follow the tower gang pod. Uh, we are on youtube. We're on rumble

01:51:44.500 Go to the locals towergang.locals.com. We're still on odyssey as well

01:51:48.980 Everything's at the uh, the link tree, which is at towergangpod.com. Anyway, so do that throw us some money on locals

01:51:55.140 If anyone donates a thousand dollars on our locals tonight, I will fuck toad 0.99

01:51:59.380 Yo, whoa 1.00

01:52:00.260 You guys heard it. So that's uh, so please don't do that

01:52:08.740 I'd say

01:52:10.020 I'd say this was as good of an episode as we could have had

01:52:12.980 And I think it was nice hanging out with you guys again. Yeah, next week, uh, we're not gonna be nice to you toad because it sucks 0.96

01:52:19.780 I know we were nice. I think we were nice. No, we were nice. That's the problem. I think it just means

01:52:24.660 We need to prepare a little bit more because we're so used to just not having prepared like we prepare

01:52:28.740 But we don't really prepare

01:52:30.340 Uh, we just expect we'll be able to riff off of toad the entire episode

01:52:34.420 Do you have any more jokes at all?

01:52:37.700 Make us laugh

01:52:38.340 If you have one more joke, I mean

01:52:40.900 What was the other one that you didn't play with?

01:52:42.500 No, no

01:52:43.460 What was your opener?

01:52:44.820 That sigh was awesome

01:52:47.540 I

01:52:48.500 I usually open with the cop one. I told you

01:52:51.380 Tell it again. That was really your opener?

01:52:52.900 Yeah, what do you follow that up with? Because I mean like

01:52:55.860 Don't stop them from laughing

01:52:57.140 Like, you know, just bending over at laughing

01:53:00.580 It it depended on uh, the situation. I had I had a couple of uh, a couple of other ones. Yeah, a couple in the pocket for you

01:53:07.860 Yeah, it's about like a little six shooter. Oh my god. I'd have I'd have to remember what they even are man

01:53:14.340 It's been a while. It's been a while. It's been too long

01:53:16.740 You know that you got one

01:53:18.740 I know you're just I know you're just gonna cut it off 0.99

01:53:23.860 I'm on I'm on I'm on it's the tower power hour slut 1.00

01:53:28.500 No way jose liberty lockdown 1.00

01:53:32.500 bitch 1.00

01:53:36.500 Cole 0.99

01:53:38.500 Top lobster and toad

01:53:40.660 Tower game tower game tower game tower game tower game tower game tower game tower game

01:53:44.740 Thank you

01:53:46.740 same with lobster colen jose

01:53:49.220 Toad is Sick Norway hose

01:53:53.300 agave

01:53:53.940 They made Day Smith, all his 0.90

01:53:54.580 Tower game tower game tower game tower game tower game tower game tower game tower game tower game

01:54:00.660 they speak courage you spend

01:54:02.820 More than Rogan you fed

01:54:04.740 Truthcome weather Timm Kast

01:54:05.380 Otep 0.68

01:54:07.220 More offensive

01:54:08.260 LOS no disrespect

01:54:10.100 More offensive than L.O.S.

01:54:11.480 No disrespect.

01:54:12.380 Yes, I am.

01:54:12.880 Redhead Libertarian is their best friend. 0.97

01:54:14.540 Shee-haw. 0.77

01:54:14.980 Unless they get raided, then they never met.

01:54:16.800 Never met. 0.99

01:54:17.380 None of this shit be new to me. 0.99

01:54:18.860 Truly. 1.00

01:54:19.340 Clint is a sexual brute to me. 0.99

01:54:20.880 Sorry. 0.99

01:54:21.340 No booster seat, get them tall boots on you.

01:54:23.080 Not a mitch. 1.00

01:54:23.380 Fuck every podcast, that won't stoop to me. 1.00

01:54:25.440 Brando. 1.00

01:54:25.640 Libertarian won't be the same day revolution-y.

01:54:27.840 That's a word.

01:54:28.400 I miss grammar, send it, it rhymed dubitedly.

01:54:30.880 That too. 1.00

01:54:31.300 Promote myself on their shot, stupidly. 0.99

01:54:33.360 Comedy philosophy, markrandom.com, user free. 0.99

01:54:35.940 Brando.

01:54:36.360 I'm single lady, so please choose a meet.

01:54:38.340 They scream tower gang worldwide.

01:54:40.600 Tower gang rise.

01:54:41.820 Together we will overthrow you.

01:54:44.160 Tower gang, tower gang, tower gang, tower gang.

01:54:48.040 Liberty lock is truth say.

01:54:50.320 Same with lobster, coal, and Jose.

01:54:52.880 Toad is sick, no way, Jose.

01:54:54.840 If you read, I ride Jose with Jose.

01:54:57.920 They made dates with all his fame.

01:55:00.340 Tower gang, tower gang, tower gang, tower gang.

01:55:02.760 They made dates with all his fame.

01:55:05.280 Tower gang, tower gang, tower gang, tower gang.

01:55:08.340 Tower gang, tower gang, tower gang, tower gang. 0.90

01:55:13.040 It's so fucking hard to line up the syllables and all it. 0.90

01:55:16.520 Tower gang, tower gang, tower gang, tower gang. 0.97

Tower Gang - July 07, 2023

Ep 130 - He's Just Like Me

Episode Stats

Summary

Transcript