Ep 140 - Titty Burrito
Episode Stats
Length
2 hours and 6 minutes
Words per Minute
215.02461
Hate Speech Sentences
356
Summary
This is the final episode of the week and it's not even close to being the last episode I've ever done on the show. We talk about the weekend belt and a bunch of other shit that's been going on the past week or so far.
Transcript
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what's up retards i'm trying to start a cult here baby
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so i can only fit a third of my dick into toad's
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you want to kill me or you want to give me a bone i don't know
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have you guys ever had the mythical where there's a whole thing in and then do that shit where they
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he was a 10 in real life she's like a dead eight
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oh hey welcome to tower gang it's wednesday bitch what's up we get to the short bus because we're a bunch of retards and so are you for watching us but that makes you fucking just like us and that makes that's why we love each other
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i'm clint russell i have 100 000 followers i'm done i'm no you're not gonna interrupt my introduction i have 100 000 followers this is the last episode i'm ever to do i was doing this show for two fucking years just trying to boost me up and i did it and i'm done and this is it and that's why i'm fucking i'm gonna mail it in and i'm gonna sleep during the introduction i'm clint russell i'm the host of liberty lockdown thank you for following me on twitter and fuck tower gang we got jose gellison on the bottom right
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we got top lobster top lobster.com top right corner we got fucking cole who used to have a show but he doesn't anymore but he hits the gym all the time he doesn't have time for podcasts because he's always hitting the gym and he's on steroids that's all he does and then we got toad who's host of better off dead you haven't heard of it because no one has and he is top left thank you for joining us
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so clint is like betting that whatever line of thought i had i would have forgotten by now
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at the end of the intro so we'll just skip the beating that we give him and you know what he's
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right i don't remember what the fuck i was even thinking
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winner that was a cole in the intro by the way if anybody
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if you didn't catch that you're you're literally retarded yes i i i found that uh i went back
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if you caught our stream on uh which which we're gonna talk about the weekend belt tonight
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uh oh yeah i went back through my snapchat with elizabeth because i had been logged into snapchat in like two
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years so i went back through it and i found that video and i sent it and i was like they were like
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we got to play this so that's just one of the i have a lot of videos like that from college which
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video which video did you find yeah because you know what oh i found the other videos that we i mean
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i found a lot of videos actually but some of those are too explicit that i can't talk about or show
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but that one was just you can talk about them yeah you can't no no no i like i like sleeping in my bed
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you already talking about it like this right like you're uh i'll talk about what i did i don't care about
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your video yeah no no i just want to know what liz did
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everybody's hands up i'll talk about everybody's hands to be seen the entire time core values
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how hairy is my ass uh clint not that hairy i don't know but your head is enormous listen it's
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hard to really tell over the barbersome buddy there's so much barbersome cole's butthole has this
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like tuft of hair that looks like a feathered boa coming out of it feathered what feathered
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boa i i kind of get the concept he's going for there it didn't didn't quite stick but you know
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i get it i had just woken up i don't remember we're not being fair to toad because once he started
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all of us halfway through gave up and said and gave we were silent halfway through like well that's
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that's not our fault that's his track record's fault he's conditioned us right is that what it is
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yes like you know what it is it's like if somebody had a dog and every time like they would hit the
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dog and then when you go to pet it he flinched exactly that's what toad starts a joke and all
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of us flinched he's he has us trained it's so funny like he this is my toads making a joke face like
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where's he going with this when's he gonna finish it and how's he gonna finish like like i have to
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analyze it as it's being made my my jokes are the anti-freeze of comedy they kill dogs okay i get
00:04:46.320
it okay i see you working all right um let's uh you want to just hop straight in the mailbag we can do
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that couldn't we yeah oh straight in the mailbag are we gonna skip over what happened this weekend
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all the fun stuff that we had we'll get we'll get a lot of time homeboy we'll get to it as our
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critics have have said about us we just roll in here and just hit play and we do we do whatever
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this is fucking freewheeling it's a hang we don't ever go anywhere directionally it's just
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between the five of us we constitute maybe one comedian well that's uh high praise
00:05:18.040
high praise from that uh show that i guess we're not talking about so one of the mailbags uh just are
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we not talking about it because like yeah we were like we were i guess we were so angry about this
00:05:30.560
that we couldn't even muster up the time or the just the the willpower to even clip this shit
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i couldn't bring myself to go back and listen to it i did listen to it the first time and i was
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like good point good point good point good point the point the point fuck you that's what i that's
00:05:46.240
what i did when i listened to it if i if i wanted to listen to like a jew talking for 45 minutes i
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would have just listened to lex friedman so oh i think it's a part of the problem it is number one
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number two number two number one in news yeah but it's number two in overall which is insane
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i didn't know that that's insane that's more crazy than the number one in news
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yeah and it's top you know it's i think it's top three in apple number two in uh in spotify and
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number one in news on spotify i was like fuck yeah bro fuck yeah people are gonna be really disappointed
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yeah so go ahead the first mailbag is uh from jack plissken and he said that the football is the
00:06:33.320
most inclusive sport in the world he sent us a video which when you first see it you're gonna
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think this is the cole video that we discussed the other night but it is not i can't show this on
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youtube by the way i hope you hope what the fuck does that mean like i'm pretty sure you can uh
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is your dick asshole or vagina yeah like is there is there genitals in this uh there are not genitals
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now oh it's my it's my last episode so i don't really care there there there there is a but and
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arguably there is a hole wait wouldn't you have to give us two weeks notice you can't just no no i've
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i've used you for two years and i'm done now so i don't you at least can give us a professional
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courtesy unprofessional i don't have to give any notice you know how much pto he has accrued over
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this time it's so much pto he just has pto yeah tons here's what i'll do i will fast forward
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the video you've missed a couple episodes right like two that is crazy two three four maybe yeah
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shut up toad we're talking about i'm trying to if you can't show it safely then don't i'm trying
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to produce here baby so i i'm just i'm moving a little bit i'm moving into the video slightly
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so you won't see this guy's butthole how about that that would be great yeah yeah great i felt
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like that was disrespectful of toad i feel like we're totally gonna see a butthole yeah i feel
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like i think we're gonna see an entire like full frontal male nudity and he was like it's not butthole
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it's totally fine these people pay us like three dollars a month we don't have to fucking show
00:08:07.000
shit that gets us kicked off of youtube unless unless we do it like uh there's that nair guy
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which i don't know if you've been watching your mom's house but the there's the course you can
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see a guy on youtube put nair on his asshole completely new it's educational and if you if
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you label it educational youtube will not take same thing you can watch like breastfeeding videos
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i promise you we're not going to get away with no i'm just saying baby listen this is not an
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education educationally everything about this is educational all right we're playing this video
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all right go ahead okay if you fuck this up you're off the show and i'm not i'm being completely
00:08:45.940
serious that's the only way you can get me to come back to the show so full disclosure
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i have not sorry tim that's tim tim cast i have not watched the rest of this video but full
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disclosure uh so what what is this oh l the football l football yeah i i don't know this is fine yeah
00:09:06.920
yeah yeah i'm gonna play it don't play it how stupid is it to name something like he had he had a
00:09:14.180
choice tim pool he could have named it tim cast or could have named it like pool cast like why
00:09:19.460
would you you went with your first name the most boring name of every name ever created
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imagine if he was like i gotta be really professional this is timothy cast
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his name is it's not even a unique name it's just like please press play first off i do to say
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you're wrong top uh pool cast does not sound good tim cast sounds pull cast sounds like it'd be
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really great they just have women in like bikinis and it's just him in there and he's like
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i guess today we're gonna talk about how long can we go without pressing play
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minimize it or press play fuck we're going we're going
00:09:54.200
it's cool yo is it wait is this is this will bell boy
00:10:02.220
dude that's awesome what is going on dude everything about that was great that dude
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showing his ass he had a huge package did you see when he grabs his like dick he had to like i mean it
00:10:28.180
was like if i grabbed my dick he'd be like this he had to like go full hand opening to get like
00:10:33.720
yeah look at that entire cock and it was still spilling out on the side that's like and then you
00:10:37.020
have the retard having a seizure in a wheelchair like oh yeah look at that again yeah show that again
00:10:44.520
you can see it standing up look how look how big his package is yeah i don't know he just kind of is
00:10:51.440
grabbing his pants you don't know how much dick he's got working no he's working with him if you're
00:10:55.420
grabbing it like that no i can do that you just grab the whole bunch you grab the balls with it
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too and it makes it look like it's bigger like this was thicker jose you're hating yeah you're
00:11:03.800
i can't believe i saw jose's dick this weekend did you did you i feel like we're gonna look at the guy
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we're gonna look at the guy grabbing his dick but not the tard spazzing out are you out of your
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fucking mind yeah let's go back to the tard he's not giving us last day energy he's giving us sleepy
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energy and he's lying about this isn't my last day i'm he but he's sleepy he's like he's dying to
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have his three hour nap today i've checked out i'm done i've already got to a hundred thousand i
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don't need can we can we just talk about this now can we just go ahead and get into this because
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it was one of the weirdest parts of the whole weekend yeah yeah so so after we're done recording
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we were like okay on saturday we're just gonna hang out we're just gonna chill all day and i think
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and clint was like after he had his thing with dave smith so he interviewed dave smith it went
00:11:49.600
very well from what he said and after that he said i'm gonna get hammered drunk and just spend
00:11:53.600
a bunch of time with y'all that's what he said so we're like whatever so he comes back we're sleepy
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clint so we're we're all in the in in top in top's parents pool so we're all just chilling there and
00:12:04.020
clint walks in he already he he started eating before like anybody else did so he comes out he's
00:12:09.480
already eating like everybody else is just like chewing that chicken was so it was so good it was great
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he somehow grabbed uh top's awesome chicken before it was before anybody else like everybody else was
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like waiting but even for like dinner to actually eat the like the hot food and he just comes in
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he has like three chicken thighs and he's just like munching on them yeah clint's like from the oven
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he came down i gave him a pound i was like hey good interview bro and he's like let me grab some of
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that chicken and he just bounced no no but then he comes directly you said you said hey are you hungry
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and i was like uh-huh and then you're like here take this chicken and i ate the chicken i got the
00:12:44.200
itis and then i make a sleepy time so but so he literally came out he came by the pool he's like
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finished eating his chicken he was like he he was like i'm gonna go uh get changed i guess into your
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swim shorts that was the one yeah he so he goes in three hours later he hasn't come back out
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like he's gone like and we're like is he okay is he fine what's going on so finally we go knock on
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this door he's out like he was asleep and so he comes back out again and my family's loud as fuck
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like yeah loud it was there it was a puerto rican family just being loud 40 40 people in this house
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he slept on the other side of a paper thin wall like dead to the world dead to the world he comes
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back out and he's like talked a little bit with us goes back in falls asleep again he goes back to
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sleep like if we're another like two hours i swear to god this guy sleeps like five hours like the
00:13:39.000
entire time he missed uh like jose leaving jose left in the middle of this and that's not my fault
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that's jose's fault first off i do want to comment though i feel like judging by the amount i saw you
00:13:50.100
while you were there you guys gave me shit about only showing up for one day i feel like i was there
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more often than clinton was total hours a week he was there longer it's close we also have to
00:14:04.260
consider the fact that i on one of our podcasts had just uh pointed out that clint has low t and i
00:14:10.280
think i was proven right by how that's true you did say low t and then the times that i was on
00:14:16.380
the shit i slept way more and way better so yeah actually it's a high t behavior it's evidence that
00:14:22.680
i have extremely high testosterone because i need to sleepy times and then we finally if you're
00:14:28.400
lethargic all the time then yeah that's low t but if you're like sleeping well and then when you wake
00:14:31.960
up you feel refreshed and you're i mean you can sleep a lot but you're sleeping deeply that is like
00:14:36.220
probably that correlates with high t yeah but i go super hard and then i sleep i sleepy time i wake up
00:14:41.940
and i go hard and then i sleep at time yeah i said he like you have like six hours a day where you
00:14:46.820
just focus in go over the walls and then you sleep for 18 hours all right look for the audience's sake
00:14:54.360
so they actually know the backstory i drove out at 3 a.m so i got there at 7 30 or so and then i
00:15:01.280
my sleep schedule was just broken it was just super broken and then we recorded and then
00:15:06.840
you get the toad song keep going no keep going no it's fine it's fine i deserve it i am sleepy
00:15:13.960
clint and uh i'm here to say uh yeah so just my sleep schedule was fucked up and we were like we
00:15:21.380
were recording and i uh when i perform i get sleepy because i'm old and i have low t and then uh i also
00:15:27.460
like you did take a nap on friday after you slept you went and took another nap and which i understood
00:15:32.700
that because you did what you did drive in the morning and then that night you slept from whatever
00:15:37.200
whenever we left probably like midnight till like 11 in the morning so he slept like still he slept
00:15:43.200
like a good long time at night space jason's actually correct i i just didn't want to be around the
00:15:49.160
puerto ricans if you noticed i i came out of the bedroom as soon as most of them were trickling out
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and then i felt i felt less stabbable he didn't even want to take a picture he like they're like
00:15:59.880
everybody take a picture and he disappeared he did the clint eastwood where he comes out and
00:16:08.840
don't you have a pinata to be hitting no that is true what if he's just super what if clint is
00:16:16.800
actually super racist towards spanish people what if he's not even sleepy what if you have the only
00:16:21.720
reason i put up with you is because i thought you hated them as much as me but i don't know that
00:16:25.760
you do because you had a whole bunch of them over at your house that is true i might be faking
00:16:30.200
but clint clint doesn't have he doesn't even admit it but maybe he's the most racist maybe he's
00:16:36.040
just in his room just going like hitting himself and going yeah yeah see see you guys got me all
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wrong i'm not old i don't have low t i'm just more racist than all and that and that is a
00:16:46.400
condemnation of all of you on this panel not me i'm young and virile and i just hate puerto ricans
00:16:54.480
the funniest part though is that uh so we did see him go in there with
00:16:58.840
clint did go in there with his swim shorts we saw him go in with his swim shorts and then when he
00:17:04.400
when he was gone for a while i was like did he just like start putting on swim shorts and just fall
00:17:08.300
asleep like he literally just like he was like halfway up and then he comes back out and he was like
00:17:12.820
actually i have done that he was like yes like i've been in the middle of changing and just went
00:17:17.560
this guy is right he's like they don't understand sleepy time is what peak performance looks like
00:17:22.020
he's right because like like you said in the hours he's awake he's look at look at what he's
00:17:26.140
accomplished 100k gonna like people asking him to be you can't argue with the numbers bro it's crazy
00:17:31.180
and he's only up six hours maybe we're doing this wrong yeah i'm telling you it's a huge mistake
00:17:36.220
to think that you need to be awake more than six seven hours a day like it's just it's just not what
00:17:40.920
you have to be doing i sleep the inverse of clint and look at may exactly he's coming for the
00:17:47.880
current president's nickname he's like i'm taking that shit oh sleepy joe yeah clint's in there he's
00:17:54.300
just sleeping for 17 hours he's taking chicken he's he's maybe washing it i don't know he's acting
00:18:00.260
like he owns the whole place he's sleeping he's look here's here's also here's also the reality of
00:18:05.520
this i'm fucking sleeping like a baby i'm i fucking drive through the middle of night i perform like a
00:18:11.360
champion i'm sleeping like a baby and i'm woken up to cole fingering his asshole and jerking off
00:18:17.600
i'm i'm traumatized oh this is so great it was so it was so much fun which if you guys watch the
00:18:26.220
previous episodes we we we talked about what what was going on with uh you know so go back
00:18:31.000
go go watch the live at top lobster uh grand episode produced toad we talked about this video
00:18:37.080
so we're walking over to my parents we found the video and we're about to show clint the video
00:18:41.720
they don't even know people don't even know about the video the actual video yet no
00:18:46.520
even though we kind of wanted to he's gotta have to yeah oh yeah he has to see it
00:18:50.900
oh this like i said this was at 11 and this is at 11 so let's not pretend that we woke him up at
00:18:55.660
like eight o'clock and he's gone it's like i can't relieve this this wasn't at like eight o'clock in
00:19:01.220
the morning we me and jose talked well and also we had to go back for a second go back to wake him
00:19:06.320
up because he was about to pod yeah go back go back for three seconds toad yeah in the video i just
00:19:12.060
want to point out how you're walking backwards a little bit more a little bit more yeah yeah yeah when
00:19:16.740
you're walking backwards and talking to us it's just a strangest posture play it and by the way we did we
00:19:20.240
did talk about his socks you can see him here what is this like it's just very i don't understand
00:19:26.680
that and we did make fun of his socks the entire weekend he that's all he wears is like these like
00:19:31.260
green socks under armor like cruise socks they're not all green i like green they were all green
00:19:36.280
they're they're under armor yeah socks that i i used to wear yeah i used to wear them yeah playing
00:19:42.700
softball with the yeah with the green with the blue shorts and the black shirt and the green socks
00:19:48.200
and and when you put all that on you didn't stop the thing for a second like he probably thought
00:19:52.240
yo yo my my fit is ill he was so excited he was he was like yeah i'm gonna look pretty good this
00:19:58.260
weekend they're actually pretty surprised no i was i was thinking i know i look like shit but i'm
00:20:02.920
fucking comfortable dude he looks like a 50 year old divorcee whose uh whose stepson is coming to
00:20:07.780
visit him but he like he he wants custody but he can't really afford it it's tragic man it's tragic go
00:20:14.160
ahead and let's uh let's fast forward to you walking through this enormous door you little tiny
00:20:17.620
man yeah oh yeah yeah that was pretty funny you all see nothing i'll see my penis
00:20:34.760
yeah that door what are we doing why are we why are we just how how small he is compared to that
00:20:40.860
door toes decide to start producing now on the dumbest shit it's it's not doing so hot
00:20:45.920
that's okay it's all right keep playing that's a normal size door just for our audience's
00:20:49.680
understanding he's actually that time we go all of us are okay mom we have to it's not a lot we got
00:20:54.940
to wake him up are you know clint sleeps naked by the way so this is definitely a risk i was
00:21:05.460
really hoping he i would see like full boner like just morning wood i'm sure you were hoping that
00:21:12.100
like brunch brunch wood is basically actually what it is
00:21:16.660
so you can hear my noisemaker for this guy put a noisemaker with him he turned it off when it
00:21:29.500
during the party we recovered it open your eyes clint instant trauma
00:21:39.700
you guys are so joyous as you ruin my life oh i was so excited for you
00:22:03.160
that was me trying to compliment your piece by the way when i said it's an impressive angle
00:22:20.740
toad is oh really cool cole is the happiest person i know in real life do you know anybody i mean like
00:22:27.220
really oh yeah no i don't know anybody there's no one happy look at him look at how fucking happy
00:22:32.120
he is right now for no reason i know i know i know dogs with less joy that was the face i had when i
00:22:37.860
saw the video oh he no seriously oh yeah that was weird and we do we do have it was very top talk
00:22:45.600
about that top please yeah just after what happened because clint had already gone i don't think did we
00:22:50.740
talk about this already or were we saving it for tonight i was just gonna say nobody needs valium if they
00:22:55.340
can give plasma i think we got secure man what time it was like 11 o'clock when we finished recording
00:23:00.880
or something like that and clint like immediately walked out fell asleep it was crazy he barely i
00:23:05.580
didn't even know if he made it to the other house he just fell asleep i slept in the yard
00:23:09.740
no no no i was i was saying top tell the story of when uh jose first sees the video of yeah
00:23:16.140
cold yeah yeah so so right after you leave uh cole comes up with the idea oh maybe it's still in the
00:23:22.480
snapchat or something like that because apparently they weren't just sending regular texts they were
00:23:26.300
snapchatting because they need a third a government party present as he's showing his butthole and
00:23:31.460
jerking off to his future wife so she goes i don't think so let me and no no no wait there's one more
00:23:36.880
thing she goes i don't think so maybe it would be on your phone still and he goes no you you you broke
00:23:42.600
that phone you threw that phone on the floor and you broke it all against a wall and then and then
00:23:49.180
that was just again just brushed over like most of cole's stories just like next thing i was like
00:23:53.320
wait a second what she threw she threw your phone like that's kind of abusive behavior anyway they
00:23:57.500
keep on moving she finds the video and and the the scary part is she's going like this right she's
00:24:03.320
looking she's scrolling she goes oh not that one no not that one either and then finally like on the
00:24:12.000
fifth scroll she's like is this the one you're talking about and he goes yeah any of them
00:24:16.140
also she had saved it as well no yes okay this is very important to me like i want to get but go
00:24:24.320
ahead i don't understand the mechanism of the save but so they're watching it together her and cole and
00:24:29.180
cole's laughing and she's kind of like oh yeah like giving him the nudge like later in my daughter's
00:24:33.740
bedroom and then and then like real nonchalant jose just goes let me see it yeah and he's like
00:24:41.920
really like you sure and he's like yeah and he takes his reading glasses out and he puts them on
00:24:47.160
he really did take his glasses out he studied it he watched the whole thing he throws on a monocle
00:24:53.120
he lights up a cigarette like a real long skinny cigarette with a little hold with that little
00:24:59.120
holder i would acquire i would acquire this footage for three thousand dollars
00:25:03.660
he's like yes i see what you're doing here this amount of shaving cream on your butthole and oh
00:25:08.960
okay now the finger is going in but liz goes liz goes like this she she goes uh she's like you sure
00:25:15.720
cole and he's like yeah show him show him he's like real excited she's like okay i guess so she shows
00:25:20.440
him and as he's looking i'm looking over jose's shoulder and just grossed out me and my wife and by the
00:25:24.960
way it's like it's top's cousin and then top's wife are there as well so it's like it's the
00:25:30.700
four of us jose jose did one of these with the phone you know like the old man yeah
00:25:35.560
like that shit so he he's got to get it within the four inches worth of workable eyesight
00:25:43.820
chimpanzee sight is like exactly like that far from your face so he needs to like
00:25:48.300
and so at the same time so so top's looking over shoulder and then toad comes around he starts
00:25:55.060
watching it and it's in this whole time i'm it's weird i'm losing it because i know what's on there
00:26:00.300
and jose just goes at the end he was like nice like you can we also can we talk about the sheer
00:26:08.520
amount of shaving cream that was used in that i want to explain myself real quick everyone think i
00:26:13.160
really want you to explain yourself everyone thinks it's bizarre but as i'm hearing it i'm like
00:26:17.920
this is the funniest thing i've ever heard of in my life why would i not want to see this that's my
00:26:23.760
perspective it was the funniest moment i said it's the funniest moment of my life that i've been a part
00:26:28.400
of like i was i was almost into tears this nigga's really sleepy i can't believe by the way i i want
00:26:35.840
to i want to tell you guys what was going on like all right we talked about it on hold on put a pin in
00:26:41.640
this guys real quick if we had to go one through five most autistic to least obviously toad number one
00:26:47.060
i'm struggling between cole and jose is that obvious as number two jose's more artistic than me
00:26:53.200
it's gotta be more artistic is that what you said no autistic no definitely more autistic
00:26:57.160
he wears his keys on his belt loop like this is the most autistic motherfucker
00:27:01.500
cole wins the special olympics i think jose edges him out on the autism
00:27:06.740
yeah i'm retarded he's just like really into like minute things that don't matter
00:27:11.640
it's hard to discern like how much of it is autism and how much of it is retardation he's like he's
00:27:17.000
like 30 something and he's got a fucking he's got like a comic book room with stickers that are
00:27:20.600
equidistant i mean this is this is a level of autism that is not normal he talked he talked about
00:27:27.680
anime we were we were in the pool and he just talked anime for an hour i'm not i'm not lying he just
00:27:34.540
literally just he was just like no he walked me through the whole marvel universe you did no i
00:27:38.400
did not call you were there i mean maybe i was briefly i barely remember i don't actually in in
00:27:45.120
2008 you know they lost rights to the hulk yes and then they picked him back on 2015
00:27:50.300
yeah interesting yeah he's like oh no you're right i did talk about this for an hour it was an hour but
00:27:56.120
yeah i don't remember why we were talking about we were talking about it was kind of a going to a
00:27:59.560
different thing but we were talking about licensing issues and stuff like that i don't remember why
00:28:03.240
how it came up but yeah can we talk about the difference though so jose is in the pool and he's
00:28:07.200
going on like a 30 minute spurg out about the marvel universe and all the technicalities of it
00:28:11.720
toes in the pool and he runs out promptly and then throws up all over my fucking lawn
00:28:18.100
yeah that happened twice and cole yeah but cole was in the pool and he was uh looking at this spider
00:28:26.700
man toy that was in the pool and just like he had wondrous childlike joy so this is what i'll say
00:28:34.260
to that so what it was i was the only one in the entire i don't see how this is novel at all this is
00:28:39.640
what you do with everything in your life it's all childlike joy it's fucking awesome i'm happy for you
00:28:43.660
this is a perfect representation of cole what happened was top throughout the weekend literally
00:28:49.220
every day would just hand me edibles i mean it was every day even when we left he hand me an edible
00:28:55.400
the day that was supposed to fly he just he would just he was just like here take this uh he's gone
00:28:59.180
whatever he was like okay yeah i can't i got caught dosing um but he would he would give me an edible
00:29:04.700
every day so i would just eat that and then i was like his his cousin was like you want to smoke some
00:29:08.520
weed and i was like fuck yeah so i smoked some weed and and then i was like his dad was giving me
00:29:13.680
rum and cokes like every time he would come out and be like rum and coke rum and coke and i'm like
00:29:19.000
yeah man let's go and so top's dad top's dad is a legit legit great host i love it oh he's the
00:29:24.940
fucking best he has the best by the way he he all right so he's this like puerto rican new yorker
00:29:29.540
dude from brooklyn or whatever and he comes out and like obviously we all know top for his art right
00:29:34.280
and his dad his dad walks out we're all sitting around the pool and his dad brings out this big
00:29:38.520
framed picture that's uh artwork of oh no that was a domino a domino table
00:29:43.900
oh okay it was a domino puerto rican thing it's himself and his two best friends from brooklyn
00:29:48.460
and he's like he's like you know what my boy my boy drew this and i'm like i'm like yeah dude
00:29:56.900
that's what your son does and it was so cute though and one of them was also there at the party and
00:30:04.860
top wanted cole to play dominoes and lose and that did not happen yeah can we go back to giving me
00:30:12.120
giving a description of how please this one's like this one's like describe the weekend yeah
00:30:17.280
yeah sorry sorry yes okay because the funniest part about it is it's like you're a massive
00:30:22.320
homosexual jerking off is almost a non-factor like whatever there's a penis but like the funniest
00:30:28.800
part is the way you're handling your butthole it's like it legit reminds me of how chicks finger you
00:30:34.260
know like you kind of do that move where you kind of like work around like the hood and you kind of
00:30:38.040
like like you weren't going straight for the butthole you were like working your way up there
00:30:41.540
like you know how it would be a chick you work the different folds you can slowly get in there
00:30:45.420
was the resolution that good i could i was just waking up so i couldn't see it yeah yeah it was
00:30:50.860
yeah you could definitely see everything i could see what he's doing his fingies yeah i was i was it
00:30:55.880
was it was a production i was putting on a production for my then girlfriend maybe fiancee at the time
00:31:02.640
and you know i'm not gonna she she wants a butthole video i'm gonna give her the best butthole video
00:31:06.900
that she's ever gotten hey ladies ladies watching right now in the chat please uh throw up a one if
00:31:12.780
you like your man to put things in his butt because i'm curious and throw up a two if you think it's
00:31:18.380
gay oh i genuinely think liz was gaslighting cold just to get funny but i think i think it's just pure
00:31:23.520
domination play yeah no no no no this is where i then i say is the chat not working for you guys
00:31:29.300
it's not working yeah i had i opened up youtube to watch it so yeah i think it stopped yeah that's
00:31:33.560
why i dropped when i dropped out it refreshed and i came back in but it's it's not going so i can't
00:31:38.040
pull up so so and what i'll say what i'll say is she saved the video so on this wasn't a regular
00:31:44.160
snapchat that was sent like uh you know how you can do a snap and then it goes away this was sent as
00:31:48.720
a video like just in the snapchat uh chat she was she was saving that shit to ruin your life
00:31:54.540
you're lucky you married her because you would be fucked unfortunately she didn't know at the time
00:32:00.980
you didn't give a fuck clearly so fine send the video you're never leaving me cole i might send
00:32:08.200
this a clip one day please show it to my friends send it to my employer i don't care do you know
00:32:14.640
what i say on twitter i've been fired 15 times it doesn't matter dude they're yeah that relationship
00:32:19.520
is so weird i feel like toad gets abused and i mean cole gets abused and doesn't know it
00:32:24.180
did you guys feel that way oh yeah definitely spousal abuse i mean i get smart enough to pick
00:32:28.680
up on it just like i get beaten it's like oh she's just having a bad day just like
00:32:35.240
he's so happy he just laughs it all off but we're all sitting there like fuck man this guy's life is
00:32:42.180
awful it's like anyone ever had like a retarded dog that doesn't even do you know like dogs like
00:32:46.600
they'll pee on the carpet or whatever you hit them with a newspaper or whatever you're doing they
00:32:49.840
usually like they have this like shame or like or that when you've yelled at them they're usually
00:32:54.180
like cole doesn't even have that it's just like okay like you've read a dog that like legit doesn't
00:33:01.120
even have that that they just like they don't even have shame like i had one i had to get rid of
00:33:05.000
because it was like it just could not learn because it just didn't get fucked that's cool
00:33:08.540
jose i'm sorry but we got to pivot back here uh you said you said what i found what i found
00:33:13.980
fascinating about this is that i was i was able to see him diddling with the b-hole you never once
00:33:18.920
explained yourself you never once what do you mean what's there to explain what that that why do
00:33:24.680
you want to why do you want to watch that it's hilarious that's it yeah i mean did your did your
00:33:29.780
dick get five percent harder i didn't didn't bounce at all all right there was it was completely asexual
00:33:35.440
i don't believe you but that's okay i was looking i was paying attention
00:33:38.320
i mean don't believe you but i was like okay nice he's got a good piece there all right oh well
00:33:43.040
that's an odd uh an odd strategy there okay all right all right you know like i did so i do want
00:33:48.260
to i want to explain what toad was also talking about with me with the spider-man toy because i was
00:33:52.460
so fucking high and so drunk and then everybody had left the pool i was what did you do with the
00:33:55.860
spider-man toy i was like the only person in the pool and what i was doing is i had let the air
00:34:02.860
out of this spider-man toy under i'm looking putting in my ass i'm so high i didn't realize
00:34:08.660
my surroundings hey guys i gotta leave can you anybody know where i put my keys and you just
00:34:14.500
hear fucking cole run over jingling cold phone was on the uh floor of the pool the bottom of the pool
00:34:21.120
you ever hear the expression like where they're like if you go into my house i want to hear you
00:34:27.880
clapping so you're not stealing anything like that's what i told cole but he's just stealing shit
00:34:31.620
with his butthole i'm just like i'm grabbing it with my ass but so i was taking this spider-man
00:34:37.680
toy and it was neutrally buoyant so it wasn't going up or down in the in the pool and so i was
00:34:42.360
just looking down and i was so high i said i had like childlike wonderment again i felt like i was
00:34:46.660
a child discovering like what water was and so i was just sitting there doing like this for probably
00:34:51.880
15 minutes and i was just watching putting it was like above my hand i'm just sitting there like
00:34:55.760
this and then they all at one time like top's wife my wife and uh another woman that came that
00:35:01.140
weekend just kind of looked at me and they're like what the fuck are you doing you're just over
00:35:06.580
there dropping the water watching public yeah i'm so excited and like i could like for some reason
00:35:13.880
like the the light was shining in the pool a certain way so it looked pretty like it was just bouncing
00:35:17.580
off light everywhere and i was i was so like engrossed in that that whatever they said something
00:35:23.300
it took me out of it and i just started i just burst out laughing but it was i probably looked like a
00:35:26.940
complete retard i mean just completely retarded what i'm taking away from this whole weekend
00:35:32.520
with just you guys is that everybody is exactly who they are so usually when you come when you come
00:35:38.980
on a show you are who you are sleepy and you turn it up you turn it up to like 11 right clint like like
00:35:44.740
if you want to be a personality these guys turn they must be turning it down because toad is way more
00:35:49.340
autistic and awkward in real life than on this show cole is way more exactly the way he is but in real
00:35:57.080
life yeah he's happy on this show he's like as happy as he is here he was way happier to see us in
00:36:03.340
person i was so excited to see y'all it was so smiling like didn't stop i have this thing with people
00:36:11.060
where i don't trust the emotions that they give off sometimes sometimes like you'd be like is that is
00:36:15.360
that real is that for 100 trust cole's emotion on happiness you can feel it yep it's not awkward
00:36:22.120
it's not i was stoked because jose was uh not like just brutally high for a while and i got to actually
00:36:29.640
talk to normal jose for a minute i was like oh there you are buddy oh cool good to meet you
00:36:35.160
i can't believe cole's employed it's like they know they're employed an actual retard
00:36:41.560
for the record i i was uh even though i was sleepy i was extremely happy to spend time with you guys
00:36:49.160
it was fucking super super fun and for the record jose you think that i didn't spend that much time
00:36:54.940
with them but uh once i did finally wake up and you were gone i spent like seven or eight straight
00:37:00.520
hours with them no no no hanging out until 2am and then i drove home we had a business cole and jose
00:37:06.200
are the ones who i'd want to be actual friends with i disagree i'm insulted if you had to take
00:37:11.720
if you had to take two of us to be actual friends with you're going to go with cole
00:37:15.160
and then jose this is also over he's an asshole yeah over offers you know look you know what though
00:37:22.420
over has met me in real life i'm insulted you know what though that's a common through line i've
00:37:27.220
seen on twitter is it's like me and cole team to be the ones people love a lot although sometimes i
00:37:31.620
get some hate from certain factions but generally speaking me and cole are like zero hate it's yeah
00:37:36.080
you get zero hate i get a little bit i didn't even that the whole podcast that went off on us
00:37:39.980
they made fun of everybody in here i didn't get a single like stray bullet at all i think there's
00:37:45.380
like look at this faggot reference the office and i'm like yeah you're right you know you know what
00:37:50.060
that means though it means you're not notable and yeah that's true no no i think with notoriety
00:37:55.300
comes hate he is notable he made he makes i know it's his energy they must sense it from there and
00:38:01.640
they're like i can't talk about this guy he's probably always smiling yeah he's a joy they feel
00:38:05.620
bad for me they're like they really like actually this is like a dei hire man like they fucking
00:38:10.240
they got this guy on here big chungo said he would hang out with top and top my nigga what's up
00:38:16.640
nice i would pull you up over here but but they fucked up the chat top just his whole family is just
00:38:21.560
so fucking the best thing is just like if i'm gonna be serious here for a moment just so
00:38:26.420
they stabbed like three of us we were gonna talk about that dude tops mom tops everything
00:38:34.820
she got them heavies i know i know she's watching that that's why i'm doing it she got some bowling
00:38:44.880
balls and a package of pudding man like they are a sweet little sweet chariot i just want i just
00:38:51.000
want to fucking lay down on the ground and let her fucking smash me to death with her you know i'm
00:38:54.240
saying just do that thing that you did with blankets when you're little and you roll yourself up but do
00:38:58.660
it with the titties yeah yeah yeah i want to fucking use her titty flesh to set up a tent and then
00:39:03.660
take a nap and take a nap or make a titty burrito and
00:39:05.700
also all man let's like her tits are actually above the level of our head
00:39:19.600
the only one i'd be legitimately worried about like making this comment and actually reading it is
00:39:29.000
is toad 100 toad yeah i feel like he'd be really into he's got he's got a huge breastfeeding uh you
00:39:35.540
know thing so makes sense but but you the only person you need to worry about is a guy who quit
00:39:39.960
the show and that's reed because reed would give it to your mom by the way oh that's i want to give
00:39:44.020
credit real quick older women i want to get credit real quick talk to you he probably was like if i
00:39:48.680
talk to her i'm gonna wanna and i know that my manly my manly aura is just too much we know we've
00:39:55.280
never we've never seen reed around a woman like that he wants to fuck he might turn into a totally
00:40:00.460
different person he might be so like just like he turns into me but it's just like yeah he's just
00:40:04.820
like completely different yeah he's just wants old pussy by the way i want to i want to give credit
00:40:12.400
i don't remember who it was but someone put out james is a top heavy lobster someone someone replied on
00:40:20.120
the on the butthole showing video to clint uh somebody replied uh it's half the seven dwarves
00:40:25.460
and are going to go wake up a man who never does leg day that was my favorite reply that's a great
00:40:29.640
comment great comment yep and i do do leg day once a week you fucking piece of shit don't look like it
00:40:35.480
and we forget who said it so they don't get credit for it good they don't by the way i do want to say
00:40:41.400
when you guys roasted me i don't even know if it was you that said that but it was some other replies
00:40:44.600
the only thing that remember that time i had the shirtless pic and then cole told me it was like i got
00:40:50.300
titty surgery um the only thing that even slightly got under my skin was one motherfucker was like
00:40:55.900
look at this dude don't do no leg day and i'm like and me i'm like my legs are my biggest goddamn thing
00:41:00.500
but it's like the angle and the shorts like you kind of can't see so you just see the like a little
00:41:06.020
bit of the calf so it just looks like it's because you wear those fucking goddamn like long
00:41:10.400
like khaki i don't know my thighs are for my wife all right he looks like a skater from 1997
00:41:16.660
it's cool the comments are a disaster i wish i could pull them up somebody says mama lopsie do
00:41:20.820
you really have them heavies yeah my mom answers yes i do i did not think what the fuck is wrong with
00:41:25.420
you guys elizabeth said wait clint works out this is disrespectful oh my god that that is what gets
00:41:33.160
under his skin the best that's the best one just to like make skinny fat or fat references just
00:41:37.240
doughy references i thought the picture we took we all looked pretty good i think i think
00:41:41.180
yeah clint almost left when he said he came in the house and he said so guys i'm going to shoot
00:41:48.000
he said you think i should run for president and and cole goes i think you should fucking run
00:41:52.580
no no no no no i'll say what it actually was no no i'll say what it was he said um
00:41:58.200
he said what are the benefits to me running and i said lose weight
00:42:01.980
he just he looked he looked at me he was like you motherfucker like you son of a bitch
00:42:10.280
all right we got one more mailbag question we do i think we have like two more we have a couple
00:42:18.960
more uh conspiracy extremists says according to recent data an alarming 82 percent of trans people
00:42:24.320
contemplate suicide 40 attempt and 13 succeed what are some things tower gang fans can do in their
00:42:31.760
community to help pump those numbers off being 13 aiming to beat the fake 1945 numbers uh top was
00:42:41.860
helping this fucking week he just like well actually top wasn't helping top was actually trying to fix
00:42:47.520
this issue top said they shouldn't be allowed to have guns and like that's actually going to fix most
00:42:53.040
of the issues i feel like it doesn't want to waste the bullets yeah do you think do you think more of
00:42:57.000
them would kill themselves uh if if they had guns or more would kill themselves from my just from my
00:43:04.060
argument of aggravating them saying that i if they did i would take them away look honestly if a if a
00:43:09.480
fucking tweet pushes them over the edge they were real they were going to go at any moment yeah what
00:43:15.000
when i get he said he sends out one tweet it's seen by a thousand transvestites and there's a hundred
00:43:22.340
less of them no crazy genocidal tweets there's 13 less yeah top's body count is thousands of
00:43:29.220
trannies 130 that's horrible man that's horrible i can't i can't believe top's tweets would do that
00:43:34.000
for those for those that don't know uh top tweeted out uh what was it it was transvestites shouldn't
00:43:40.380
have guns and i just said uh trans shouldn't be allowed to have guns no the best thing is that
00:43:46.600
you have mostly a libertarian audience no you said they shouldn't have guns no you said they
00:43:50.680
shouldn't right you said yeah that was the key point sorry trans shouldn't have guns maybe that's
00:43:55.220
what i said right it should be allowed too he didn't say that that was a key key point that was
00:44:01.260
playing up that was that was the mind which by the way top also agrees with that too
00:44:04.880
don't make that clear he's like i also i also agree with that but that's not what i said
00:44:10.720
but he was trying to trigger all the libertarians because they were they got into the legal aspect
00:44:16.100
yeah and it was just it was just a war dude he was just going to war forever this came right on
00:44:19.640
the heels of of me ending spike cohen's uh 2024 presidential run thank you and right after i
00:44:26.440
realized that i had the l the lp people hating me so i said okay i'm gonna drop this bring you trans
00:44:33.260
people in and then the other trans people in and have you all attack me at once and i'm going to
00:44:38.160
see what the monetization payout looks like in about two weeks from that maybe we were a little
00:44:43.520
too harsh on spike with the whole trans genocide thing he seems he was right so i said trans people
00:44:49.320
shouldn't own guns there you go there you go that's which is a true statement i mean and like to
00:44:56.160
argue that it's just like i mean it's objectively true just i have statistics like i have statistics on
00:45:01.300
my side what do you have your side like emotions who gives a fuck about that the thing is top top
00:45:07.460
and doing this actually principles he actually proves spike right that there you have love for
00:45:13.060
your common man fuck you that there is a trans genocide but the thing is that top is the one
00:45:18.040
committing the entire thing yeah that was my point yeah that was that that was a joke yep we got that
00:45:23.280
all right third one oh what can we do to pump those numbers up top's already handling it no no
00:45:27.960
seriously if you want to pump the numbers up it's just continually go on to that like we said uh
00:45:32.140
last week go on to that trans passing board post pictures of you as a man say i'm a female to male
00:45:39.360
and just watch them be like i'll never be like that and then post like your wife or girlfriend on there
00:45:44.060
and be like i'm male to female and they will never be able to live up to that and then in the comments
00:45:48.920
leave a tagline from our intro like uh what is that a mussy you know oh yeah like that so that we
00:45:55.340
know like the tom segura your mom's house thing like we want to be able to go there and see that
00:46:00.180
our fans are yes so if you want to yeah like be like uh do you say that was jerking off in the
00:46:06.380
corner um say i'm trying to look like a dead eight yeah dead eight just say dead eight uh oh yeah because
00:46:14.080
if they say rate just be like that's a dead eight right there just so fucked up all right all right
00:46:20.960
next one next one toad all right this will be the last one we do i guess this is mayo monkey 35
00:46:25.860
do you know what a dirt eater mask is and this is something we almost oh yeah yeah no yeah we
00:46:31.860
passed which we almost got this right here yes whoa what the fuck oh yeah i have seen this yeah yeah
00:46:37.780
because we were going to talk about this yeah we're really close this what is happening so so this is
00:46:43.320
someone actually brought this up in a tweet that was like saying like hey like this is what they used
00:46:49.980
to do to slaves in africa they would do this and this is like so they wouldn't talk and then like
00:46:54.400
the and then the the community notes is like actually crazy and i believe it yeah but those
00:46:59.600
funny part was that the the community notes came back up and like it says there they were like
00:47:02.880
actually this is so they wouldn't eat fucking dirt like this is legitimately stopping africans from
00:47:08.200
eating dirt why were they eating dirt i guess they got you're not that far from the aboriginals like
00:47:12.820
this is not this is very believable right like i mean i gotta i gotta say it does remind me of an
00:47:18.460
abo rocking a trash bag filled with gasoline it's really close insanely close i mean it does look
00:47:25.720
like you know you just pour gasoline in that thing and just be like can you imagine i bet there has
00:47:32.180
been a couple of them dying just by putting a paper bag or like the plastic bag over their head and
00:47:36.140
they like like spray some gas but then they tie it off and they sit there and huff it and they
00:47:39.960
fucking die i feel like that's happened probably on gas oh for sure for sure i yeah i think they
00:47:45.920
they faint often yeah i think they eat dirt because uh black women have gritty pussies and
00:47:51.440
it reminds them of eating that what do you think a pussy does you know what he's kind of actually a
00:47:59.200
little bit right now i think about it pussy's not a chicken gizzard wait you you no no no no no no
00:48:03.540
think about pussy hair of black chicks that's not what he's talking about yeah that isn't what he
00:48:08.700
said though no it's all nappy and shit he thinks there's actual sand in there he doesn't know
00:48:12.120
he thinks he thinks black people sandpaper pussies yes exactly what did you say crunchy pussy what did
00:48:19.920
you say gritty gritty pussy oh you can oh no this is great because there's a new thing around saying
00:48:26.920
to call him grippy like are you grippy like is that pussy grippy so you got grippy or gritty and so you
00:48:32.840
you got that gritty you're grippy you got that gritty you're grippy yeah she got the grippy she's
00:48:38.180
great she got the gritty like you don't you don't want to hit that do you actually say that to your
00:48:42.060
wife cole i feel like you're you're young enough to like bring that up oh be like uh can i have that
00:48:47.280
grippy tonight i swear i got it i'm like you get done i get done like fucking you know we're you know
00:48:53.740
i'm having my cigarette afterwards and it was like you was mad grippy tonight
00:48:57.020
it's just like you was mad grippy also i've been making me feel awkward can we can we go back to
00:49:06.140
talking about tops mom's tits real quick i actually talked about the grippy thing on the after show the
00:49:11.980
tim cast of tim cast the uh i was literally talking with hannah claire uh brimlow about how pussies do
00:49:17.940
that grippy thing because we were talking about the logistics of the lizzo banana thing and i was like
00:49:22.260
well i don't know we all know how women do that grippy thing so i mean i'll just assume you know if you
00:49:26.280
have a correct object in the right shape you do that grippy thing shoot right out i want to think
00:49:30.100
that you started this whole because i've seen a lot now that people are talking about uh the grippy
00:49:34.480
and it's like it's hell yeah i started it yeah it was terrence yokel and grippy yeah i started it in
00:49:41.840
a paywalled show yes all right last last one all right well i guess that was the last one uh pull up
00:49:48.600
that video please pull up that video that i told you about oh yeah yeah something completely different
00:49:54.100
all right guys we've got a fan boy does it yes uh sdg has no grippy socks grippy socks grippy box
00:49:59.800
that's what they talk about because it's the girls that wear it like they for some reason
00:50:03.800
oh because of like in um psych wards like they give them those like socks you know the the socks that
00:50:10.640
have the grippy part on the bottom and they're saying that she's crazy so she got that grippy box
00:50:15.480
she's wearing those grippy socks she got the grippy box i don't think they're related to the socks but
00:50:19.940
i get another guy in rumble that said he no because they're in the sight words they're crazy
00:50:23.800
that's fucked up clint nobody nobody's picking us as friends you know what um or me you know yeah
00:50:30.480
it's weird they wouldn't pick clint like clint's like the most like he would be like hey i'm just
00:50:34.220
hanging out with dave smith this weekend you if you were clint's friend like close friend no no you
00:50:38.140
know i come across like i'm an asshole but i'm actually pretty nice in person he sleeps most of
00:50:42.460
the time though clint drives a fucking corvette he's on like boats with a ton of scantily clad
00:50:46.980
women like why would you not want him as a friend no no i knew no that's never brought us
00:50:51.420
yeah it makes it it makes it sound like i'm a pompous pompous asshole that you wouldn't want
00:50:55.240
to be around so i understand here's how i knew clint was actually a good guy he would sit there
00:50:59.660
and listen to toad talk for like a while like he would just sit there and toad would just be talking
00:51:04.100
a story and clint would literally just and be like in like just actually listening i was like i was
00:51:08.360
like i get to go to bed soon i get to go to bed soon and i was like he's a good guy he's a really
00:51:12.840
good guy that's why i kept going to sleep i was like toad would come talk to me and i'd be like
00:51:18.040
fuck i gotta go take a nap you just fall asleep talking to him and so he just stands there awkwardly
00:51:22.740
and like walks out of your room does nobody want to be my friend just because they have to constantly
00:51:27.940
talk me down from suicide that definitely doesn't make me want to be your friend i'll tell you that
00:51:33.240
much does it make you feel weird like if people because most people don't know you're sleepy so like
00:51:37.420
when you're trying to exit a conversation like you're like can they tell i'm sleepy can they tell i'm
00:51:41.280
sleepy can they tell i'm sleepy they just think you're really high just like all the time i was
00:51:46.100
i was sober the whole time too which by the way we should mention toad was stone cold sober just
00:51:51.100
throwing up for no fucking reason no no we because he was nervous to have to be around human beings
00:51:56.460
and he was vomiting because he thought we were going to kill him this weekend he was actually
00:51:59.840
legitimately nervous yeah but here's the thing i have so many ailments that it never crossed my mind
00:52:04.600
that the reason why i was throwing up was uh caffeine withdrawal yeah and keep in mind keep in mind
00:52:09.440
too folks i asked toad explicitly i said are you doing anything differently that would cause you
00:52:15.500
to be nauseous and he said no i asked you and you still couldn't even process it here's the reason
00:52:21.580
toad shut up the reason was so so toad shut up shanna cole and toad get there uh on thursday i think
00:52:30.600
so thursday night i set everything up and cole's like hey let's take it for a spin see if it works
00:52:35.380
so i'm like all right cool so we all have the mics we're ready to press just about to press live
00:52:41.600
cole's kid starts screaming bloody murder in the room yeah and doesn't stop and he's like he doesn't
00:52:47.660
usually do this i don't know and he's like he goes upstairs and this kid is screaming i'm stressed
00:52:53.660
out i look at toad and i'm like are you stressed out and toad looks stressed out but not because of
00:52:59.600
the kid not because of the kid crying toad gets so stressed out that he stands up and he starts
00:53:05.120
pacing in my living room i need to get my steps that's why it was bullshit it was a combination of
00:53:10.520
all these things he's punching he's punching the air you know you know why because he he thinks cole's
00:53:15.300
upstairs grabbing an ar-15 coming down to handle his business that's not why he actually thought i
00:53:21.240
went upstairs to fuck elizabeth and he was like i don't get to watch what the fuck that could be it
00:53:25.560
i said toad what's wrong and he's like fans fans have been waiting we told him 11 35 and it's 11 50
00:53:35.100
what a fucking spaz this guy is i love it spazzing and i'm like dude relax i was like you know cole's
00:53:41.040
kid might be something wrong like it sounds like we're gonna have to bring him to the hospital
00:53:44.120
dude this motherfucker a half hour before we restarted he's like where are you guys at
00:53:50.640
like are you are you out of your mind like i'll show up 40 he's like he's like you homo's gonna
00:53:56.520
join i was like no i have to nap did you make a comment that i wasn't there when all you guys
00:54:02.580
were there no no what i don't think so i don't know what you mean no because i actually came in
00:54:07.780
late i'm usually there before you oh i mentioned that yeah i know i figured you did yeah i figured
00:54:12.740
you did all right could you please play the video jesus christ wait that's not the point i was
00:54:16.840
making this this guy gave himself a headache and then for two a two-day headache from being nervous
00:54:21.520
because we started late ended up throwing up twice from the headache it's not because of fucking
00:54:25.560
caffeine he completely stressed him he stressed himself out by being 20 minutes late for this
00:54:30.540
show that doesn't matter meanwhile i would go out and i i jump on the trampoline in the morning
00:54:34.620
tough that was so fucking every day top would be like he would just look at his wife and be like
00:54:40.660
this motherfucker like he would just tell like what some stupid thing i did to his wife and she's
00:54:45.200
like really and he's like yeah he's insane and cole maintains a blood alcohol content somewhere
00:54:50.840
around 0.24 like the entire in the entire time and he's high as fuck i was insanely high yeah i think
00:54:58.440
you just you live a fucking awesome life the alcohol and and the drugs have more of an effect on him
00:55:03.180
because of the lack of plasma yeah yeah absolutely it's true makes perfect sense go ahead does it even
00:55:08.500
affect you do the drugs even affect you because would you even be more happy or something all right top
00:55:14.940
top is now trying to trigger me it's okay go ahead and play the video we're doing it uh my husband
00:55:19.100
is mj sexual i'm mj pretty much any aesthetic that i adapt um he's digging it and he's fucking with it
00:55:26.720
this is uh when him and i first started talking online um you know he hit me back up so obviously
00:55:34.480
he was digging it after we started talking um i ended up detransitioning for a short period
00:55:40.900
um so i presented feminine for like a month and a half and uh he was digging it i went from straight
00:55:47.340
hair to curly hair he was digging it that's like how's his wife my entire weave had a little pixie
00:55:52.380
type thing he was digging it he's about to literally engulf my head so digging it i transitioned the back
00:55:59.480
grew up my beard i don't know which is i don't know which my beard he really likes me with a clean
00:56:05.080
face so uh he's obviously digging it i don't know whatever this style is looks like i'm a taxi cab
00:56:10.460
driver but he's got the neck my husband won't even answer this question into me anymore and that's
00:56:17.260
because like he's always like ever since he medically transitioned he's identified as like a gay dude
00:56:21.860
but he knows that he's gonna be attracted to me and love me and be with me no matter what i look like
00:56:27.060
so uh what's the point in answering no matter what i do he'll be digging it mj sexual should uh
00:56:35.420
i don't wait a second they them own a gun that's the biggest question what the fuck are you talking
00:56:41.940
about what is going on in this video did you i don't know i think this is why we had to watch
00:56:48.060
this is it's an obese bald uh man or woman i don't even know you can't you can't tell what their
00:56:55.240
gender is i think it's a biological woman i think yes it's biological woman and they are talking
00:57:01.180
about their boyfriend liking them no matter what to the point that they're mj sexual which i guess
00:57:07.120
is this person's name we don't even know if it's a boy or a girlfriend like he said medically
00:57:11.760
transitioned the boyfriend so the best the best cliffhanger twist though is when she goes and then
00:57:18.820
he transitioned yeah so they both look like each other they're both fucking clones of one another
00:57:25.160
and they're both flip-flopping who the fuck they are it's like it's like a it's like a fun house
00:57:29.660
mirror where they just leap through and they become each other over and over again i don't even think
00:57:32.760
the other guy exists that's where i'm at right now oh you think it's the same person it's like a schizo
00:57:37.840
thing this is actually like a distinct possibility it's the new version of um fight club but it's
00:57:44.080
just like it's a trans fight club is what it is give them guns put them in schools with guns
00:57:48.060
can you imagine being like oh yeah cool i have a penis you have a vagina how about i flip this
00:57:55.060
thing inside out make a hatchet wound and you turn your shit into a fucking i don't know lovecraftian
00:58:00.040
horror just take off my fucking now we fuck and we don't really feel anything and just kind of like
00:58:04.440
imagine having that much sex where you get to that point where you're like i have had so much
00:58:09.280
sex i can't enjoy it i gotta cut this thing off no i don't think they have sex i legitimately don't
00:58:13.600
think they have sex i think this is all i think this is all things like they like they hate each
00:58:18.140
other for real i think they hate each other and they just keep trying like person yeah they hate
00:58:23.240
themselves which is why they keep transitioning yeah this is great this is weird it's it's like a lot
00:58:28.360
of hoops to jump through just to like become yourself again like to become each other i hope
00:58:34.560
you caught that that did look like jose's wife for a second there there was like a that's highly
00:58:40.340
offensive it looks like jose's wife if she was actually real this is like if you guys just made
00:58:47.500
you made fun of my mom's tits for like 20 minutes and that was that was too far yeah
00:58:51.520
i mean i didn't care but i was like inaccurate but okay so uh so we're fucking right and then i uh
00:59:00.640
take i i pull his dick out and then i flip my pussy inside out and then i have a dick and then i fuck
00:59:05.400
him in the ass and he's digging it and then and then we're fucking sitting there we're watching the
00:59:09.520
news and then i i say hey you want to go play golf or watch the football game and he's digging it
00:59:14.360
and then i'm like hey you want me to start working and you could stay home with the kids and he's
00:59:18.860
digging it and then i fucking flip the gender role and he's digging it and it's like wow that would
00:59:24.180
actually be pretty great though if at if like during sex if they had some weird like transformer
00:59:28.140
thing where they could just go like from male to female in like in the middle of sex so it's just
00:59:33.240
kind of like let's just flip like i'm just gonna fuck your bubble i think i think that's the idea
00:59:36.700
catch a string to it you just pull it out and then push it back in yeah she's like yeah
00:59:40.620
cole cole if they had that technology if they had the technology where you could just do it and undo it
00:59:46.740
would you let liz fuck you oh you know he would yeah would you be like hey babe you want to fuck
00:59:52.160
me tonight yeah like you wanted i just want to ask her okay guys i just want i would just be like do
00:59:57.240
i have the grippy and then just see what she says oh bro i have i have no doubt in my mind you have
01:00:02.560
the grippy does he have a grippy liz let us know you gotta let us know in the chat she just put the
01:00:08.640
vomiting face there's a 99.9 chance that liz puts on a strap-on and gives cole the business on the
01:00:15.180
regular and i am very confident of this still hit it still counts guys i'm getting played
01:00:24.160
i'm just like do we have sex every day and she was like i peg you every day and she was like
01:00:31.100
you're like so okay i still came whatever which which by the way you guys can't really tell on the
01:00:36.720
webcam but cole is an incredible shape and he's caked up like a motherfucker like i'm not gay at all
01:00:42.000
but i'm looking at his butt cheeks and i'm like delectable so i strongly believe i strongly believe
01:00:48.300
that one he's got the grippy and two liz is giving him the business and i want it on video and i want
01:00:54.080
to wake up to it every day the next thing at the next time we do a live event i'm like hey guys
01:00:58.360
look what i got it's just like elizabeth just going to town and it's the first time i'm unhappy i'm just
01:01:06.400
crying i'm gonna keep up in the ante in five years from now i'll be like here we we ritualistically
01:01:11.880
murdered a child here you go i'm a felon jose jose will be watching and studying it i'll be jerking
01:01:20.440
off and clint will be asleep god willing i'll be asleep forever it's it's it's weird uh by the way
01:01:27.120
the clint is sleepy when the rest of us are the seven dwarves i was thinking that hey oh wow
01:01:33.680
well thought out insightful okay i'll give you one of those that's a nice button give him the
01:01:39.720
button he earned it um thank you all right all of them are keep asking if i want to get pegged no i
01:01:45.820
don't want to get fucking yes you fucking do bro you like so not into that you put the razor
01:01:51.620
you put the razor handle you put the dough razor handles up your keister there's no fucking way
01:01:57.300
that you don't want her to get the poop flex out of the little you know because you know how like
01:02:01.680
the razor's have like the oh dog are you serious the poop the poop flex is what i do when i squat
01:02:08.160
to take a shit this is what so you do get shit everywhere see this is what she was saying in the
01:02:13.700
chat she said oh no you got the poopy that means that they're fucking around all the time and she
01:02:17.780
probably puts a finger in his butt and then she probably makes it a thing like
01:02:20.560
cole you know i keep getting shit on my finger she probably rubs it on his face you stupid bitch
01:02:25.340
and cole's like he's like he's like hold up i gotta go get on the trampoline and you're like what
01:02:31.300
she's giving him the dirty sanchez it's wild she can't get you a nut even while working the butthole
01:02:36.720
like you know what i mean i bet i bet if i bet if she if she was like just like two seconds of top
01:02:42.680
and then she's like two seconds of bottom and i would i would not probably
01:02:46.660
with her finger or mouth finger or mouth on the butt i mean i mean both would be great wouldn't
01:02:53.040
it i mean okay okay just i'm just seeing what you're doing freakily she said i have gotten poop
01:03:00.000
on my finger and that was the one and only time because i guess after that she forced you to douche
01:03:03.980
or something what jose jose your wife's never fingered your ass at all never even tried it no no no
01:03:10.780
even tried she's like no no thanks yeah oh i like that i like that i like that that means a
01:03:16.060
cole or that jose's been asking she's like for the final fucking time no i'm not gonna do it
01:03:24.060
i mean i've never asked to put my finger in my ass but i've been like i have kind of like
01:03:29.020
be like hey you know all these kids these days eating buttholes so i don't know you know i mean
01:03:34.420
i'm not saying i want to do that or anything but you know like yeah you do want to do it and that's
01:03:39.300
okay and i respect that i'm not gonna lie there's a little bit of factor of like i'd almost want to
01:03:43.580
be like hey baby can i just get some like you know three dollars have to be on this dude they
01:03:48.260
don't want to be on to something right they have to be yeah what they have to be on okay there's no
01:03:55.520
way like what they do episode 140 cole comes out as gay the gays crack the code this is really bad
01:04:04.360
for my marriage where i'm going like yeah i think they're on to something yeah i'm sure anal
01:04:08.720
sex at a certain point probably starts to feel good i think it's just the first
01:04:11.940
ten go-arounds that you're like i mean that's what the prostate is if you did become gay would
01:04:17.680
you would you break up with your wife no i don't think so would she have to transition
01:04:23.800
i wouldn't be able to come out i wouldn't i would no if i was gay yeah well we we already
01:04:29.480
knew that you wouldn't be able to come out but because your parents no just because of like
01:04:34.100
everybody in my i mean the entire internet would destroy me the like y'all destroy me every
01:04:38.800
fucking like time we get together y'all destroy my ass y'all just be like oh yeah yeah which would
01:04:44.500
you rather tell your parents that you're gay or that you have this show oh that's a great
01:04:50.380
that's a good one yeah shit fuck that's really hard because like this is the most he's ever
01:04:57.880
smiled on this show he's just like do they want like an abomination for a son or do they want like
01:05:04.880
a did oh god abomination for a podcaster um i think they would rather me like be heterosexual and to be
01:05:15.040
doing this podcast okay i really think so but i'm gonna i'm gonna send them the video of you
01:05:19.660
fingering your ass on this podcast on the podcast but don't worry he's straight he's just out of his
01:05:27.400
fucking mouth i really i really think if they like if they found that they they would be really like
01:05:31.460
at least like he's fucking a woman and all these like in this weird threesome he's fucking women like
01:05:36.720
at least he's not they were like he's gay they're like mom it was in the confines of my marriage
01:05:40.620
conspiracy extremist says would you rather tell your parents you're gay or libertarian
01:05:45.160
it's a close one you're libertarian just barely just ever so slightly yeah that's how i know toad
01:05:54.320
is gay is because i'm in the closet with him oh that's cute yeah so i see him in there and i'm
01:05:59.420
like dude you can just go out dude i have a wife i i have to stay in here like toad you can go out
01:06:04.080
dude i don't you don't have you have nothing to like to like keep you back just go ahead toad's
01:06:08.740
like no tops outside he's trying to kill me us merry guys wish we had the freedom like you to
01:06:13.860
come out of the closet so yeah yeah yeah all right every chance at the top row of this show
01:06:18.520
is literally gay clint you realize that right all right guys yeah i'm gay i guess i've thought
01:06:23.820
it for a long time yeah dude that's awesome man explained so much yeah you know i'm gonna find you
01:06:29.360
some pussy dude i'm gonna bend over and find you no i look here here's here's the here's my honest
01:06:35.720
to god honest to god he's he's he's so you know how he always goes like we go like hey just fuck
01:06:42.300
dude and he's like no it's saying it's you know it's it's for the confines of marriage to reproduce
01:06:46.880
only only i think that he's been like so mindfucked with that that like it's it's about like his desire
01:06:53.940
is to come in a man's butt but he's like there's no potential for a baby so he will just never have
01:06:59.200
sex oh man the chat is so great right now and i stream you are just fucking up on the i know it
01:07:05.720
really sucks because i'm watching it too it's just fucking stream yard they're destroying me they're
01:07:10.500
destroying toad i mean they're actually they're really happy they're actually really happy for
01:07:14.640
toad is anyone they said that they want they said that me and toad would be a great couple
01:07:17.840
is anyone saying that they want to be my friend or no still no one
01:07:24.820
three opportunities now three opportunities to say that they want to be your friend he has a
01:07:29.180
hundred thousand followers guys not a single friend though yeah maybe reconsider before you
01:07:34.360
go the route of dave smith and just put it on iowa pilot on your comedy show okay
01:07:37.640
he does his show because he's like i got all these followers man but i got if you think toad is lonely
01:07:43.900
if you think toad is lonely clint man like in his free time he's like he's worse than toad he's just
01:07:48.860
like god i just want somebody here's here's the reality i am i'm leaving behind all of my old
01:07:55.580
friends and i'm creating famous friends because like this morning i wake up to a text from dave
01:08:00.360
you know because i wake up at noon obviously and he's texting me hours ago no big deal it's a text
01:08:05.220
from dave smith and the dave's forwarded me uh some links that rogan sent him about vivek and i'm like
01:08:10.440
and then i'm then i'm texting anomaly about that and i'm saying yo i think dave and rogan are gonna watch
01:08:14.680
your your uh your grilling of vivek whenever it happens and i'm like i'm like look i got friends
01:08:19.820
but they're just all famous and i'll never see them in person so i'm very lonely now that's the
01:08:23.940
can we can we can we tease about the thing that you found out i think on sunday wait can we just say
01:08:29.820
what a power what an unintentional power move that is this is clint has literally slept his way to the
01:08:34.220
top like yeah man slept his way to the top in more ways than one yeah and jose how long would it take
01:08:43.440
for you i guarantee you if he had dave's number and dave texted him cole would be like i mean jose
01:08:48.060
be like honestly to be completely honest like six months ago yeah i mean i'm not saying i dislike dave
01:08:55.760
or like i mean he's a great guy but i'm saying like i've kind of got bullshitting i've gotten over
01:08:59.940
that like oh my god it's dave like you know i mean just like oh yeah i mean not that we like
01:09:05.020
regularly talk or anything but like if i hit him up on twitter you know occasionally be like hey
01:09:09.320
you know like i congratulated him on the fucking rogan and uh his special and i just that was it
01:09:13.980
i gotta say i gotta say real quick last night um i'm scrolling through youtube just to see like what
01:09:19.180
i want to watch and and there's a uh the the live tour that the legion of skanks guys are doing right
01:09:24.160
um where they're traveling all around the country and it's like a behind the scenes footage thing it's
01:09:28.640
really cool um but i'm watching dave interact with lewis and big j and i'm like and i i honestly it
01:09:34.120
was the first time i was like i was like oh yeah dave's famous oh yeah i had actually i had actually
01:09:40.140
like let that go um so yeah then i remembered yeah the eight times on rogan didn't get you there
01:09:47.180
no well no no i'm saying i'm saying he he was famous in my eyes and then he became normal dave in
01:09:53.740
my eyes and then i remembered he's famous well we talked about this didn't we about over the weekend
01:09:57.440
i said something about how like things become normal for like you and i said it was from i
01:10:01.880
watched the video bro bro imagine imagine two years ago if daniel mcadams reads my tweet to ron paul
01:10:07.260
i would have been i would have been fucking over the moon your butthole yeah i would have been
01:10:11.320
picking my butthole i would have been jerking off i would have been taking video i've been sending it
01:10:14.340
to your wife it would like i would have done the whole thing right and then this time i'm just like
01:10:18.140
yeah of course you know like it's it just it does it does start to get normal it's weird it's weird
01:10:23.060
i feel like like for clint is kind of famous but i still don't have any friends so you know
01:10:28.160
clint clint is kind of famous but we treat him like shit like we treat him probably worse than
01:10:31.760
i told you guys at at your house i said the only reason i hang out with you guys is to treat me
01:10:37.780
like shit it makes me feel better that's what friends do yeah i don't know if i do it because
01:10:42.160
i'm his friend yeah listen like i genuinely don't like you well you know you know all these like
01:10:50.900
uh rich famous people like they they like to be dominated in some situations just to like flip the
01:10:57.000
script yeah clint's into that shit yeah i don't have i don't have a sexual kink i just want my
01:11:00.540
my guy friends to fucking talk shit to me yeah we are clint's dominatrix yep and uh that's why
01:11:06.320
i like to be woken up from you know colby and gay and i'm like yeah this makes me feel better
01:11:10.780
i'm picturing i'm picturing at like one of a live event that we get like leather and like a face
01:11:15.220
mask for for toad and let him do cock and ball torture to clint that would be a very funny photo
01:11:20.280
shoot god it'd be very funny but i would really
01:11:22.560
we're getting really close to the line he's like because like we're getting really close to the line
01:11:30.040
we haven't crossed it yet but you're getting there are we are we gonna go the way the crowder
01:11:34.220
and start doing like producing little skits that are like so gay but you're like but we're making fun of
01:11:38.700
it oh it's not gay we mean it yo we mean so much that it's not me and toad me and toad are in
01:11:43.880
dresses all the time we're like it's just really funny like my my goal we start making out we're
01:11:49.940
basically lewis and yeah we just put with like we just do it all the time like it's it's way too
01:11:54.860
much like they do it like once like every five years like we do it like every time we're to get
01:11:58.860
every episode every episode we just make out like it's so funny so hop in here hop in here
01:12:04.100
so it's got something to say i can tell my goal is to make clint yell the safe word
01:12:08.540
all right that's what you have to say hey what what what should the safe word be toad you pick
01:12:13.960
good question i know what he's gonna say do you yeah i think so i have a good idea i mean i knew
01:12:20.140
what it would have been had we not told you that we knew yeah no no he's doing his head
01:12:24.620
n-i-g-g-e-r yep what is it toad cock down all right i feel like that could be easily said
01:12:37.060
in the fields of passion you know what i mean no no don't stop i'm just saying the name of my show
01:12:40.920
but i forgot how it's spelled 100 100 clint has said before making love to woman i'm about to give
01:12:46.820
you that liberty cock down i haven't but that's now my new thing you need to say you need to start
01:12:53.340
saying that to all the all the women on the road be like normally i say i'm gonna lock down that
01:12:57.640
pussy girl yeah there you go it's like you got that you got that grippy girl let me get that grippy
01:13:02.380
grippy grippy good good oh what what are our like uh catchers be for sex like because clint is
01:13:09.080
obviously he's gonna be liberty cock down yep top what would it be you're like here top coxta
01:13:14.160
top coxta that's great by the way i did finally watch the uh the because i didn't know it was
01:13:19.360
jordan peterson you got your name from so i finally watched the video where he talks about the and he
01:13:23.300
says top lobster and i was like it's a book it's in the chapter one of his book it's oh i watched i
01:13:29.080
watched a youtube video on it it was like four minutes long he really did jose would be jose
01:13:36.640
jose what would you be like if you're like the same thing as liberty cock down no way i'm gonna last
01:13:41.840
yes way jose it's so bad yeah just i'm gonna gorilla fuck you because that's because even
01:13:51.840
top's cousin was like that dude really probably does actually gorilla he only gorilla fucks right
01:13:56.500
oh he really he ain't lying his cousin came out and talked about it for a long time it was really
01:14:00.900
funny he was he was like oh i forgot i forgot top is able to gorilla walk really really well it's
01:14:06.160
hilarious i surprised myself yeah dude yo you got to do that all the time because we were talking about
01:14:11.040
jose and and his cousin was like i don't think jose has ever made love i just think he gorilla
01:14:16.720
fucks every time and we and we all in unison went i've made love but it always turns into gorilla
01:14:24.160
fucking by the correct yes and we all know that well who the fuck who the hell can make i feel like
01:14:29.920
making love is like kind of like making out slow kind of like sensual but like i can't do that for an
01:14:34.800
entire fuck like you know you have a while but then you pick up tempo i can't do that for two
01:14:38.800
minutes confirm or confirm or deny because i've been theorizing about this for a while because
01:14:43.280
obviously i think about all of your packages uh is your dick like a short can of pringles no it's
01:14:50.620
actually like not that thick but i mean it's got a little bit of growth to it it's an average dick
01:14:55.480
wow it looks nice on me if your height isn't thick yeah it's gonna look it's gonna look skinny
01:15:00.580
because you're such a fucking i think it's thicker than average but it's not like it's as thick as
01:15:05.860
you would think if you're trying to be like yes you know like if you're like oh look at his size
01:15:09.980
he's clearly no no i look i have a perfect visual i will be able to jerk off later thank you for
01:15:13.980
clarifying yeah i basically honestly me and cole have very similar cocks so yeah same body type
01:15:18.900
yeah it makes sense oh by the way that never happened the liftoff never happened somebody
01:15:24.960
backed out oh cole did i said hey you're gonna do push-ups he's like i did i'm gonna go swim
01:15:31.620
no no no no no i said because at this time clint wasn't awake and top wasn't even there and i said
01:15:37.080
i'll do it but we need to get clinton top here to actually watch it but and then i it was not the
01:15:41.800
liftoff that i wanted hey that was it's a liftoff you got faggot would you would you mind playing
01:15:47.620
just a couple of the clips from the what is this podcast because i we gotta we gotta play a little
01:15:52.420
bit oh yeah we gotta talk about this i feel like it would be funnier if we spoke about it briefly and
01:15:56.640
then not who who cares yeah all right well if if you guys want to do that but i i think it's funny
01:16:01.680
personally okay play some clips i guess we'll be here what do you mean clips just random clips we never
01:16:05.980
took any time no no no toad has time stamps okay i do uh this one uh should anger clint especially
01:16:12.080
because he said the opposite earlier in this episode well it's okay they're wrong and level of
01:16:17.220
mic control you gotta bump that volume start backing away while they're in the middle of a sentence and
01:16:21.480
then one of them's eating the microphone yeah uh but just to jump back a second sure and i only pulled
01:16:28.660
audio clips but uh after that long intro with credits like it's a fucking sitcom these guys sound like
01:16:34.340
every radio station host ever there's another intro welcome everybody to another live stream edition of
01:16:39.660
tower gang i know the vast majority of you are turning off the tucker and donald trump interview to come
01:16:45.700
watch us fucking retards because you got i mean how many retards can you watch at a time let's see
01:16:50.740
if you can watch six at a time which we lost one of them anyways uh this is clint russell host of liberty
01:16:55.700
lockdown top left we got jose galison host of no way jose top middle we got toad host of better off dead
01:17:01.940
we got mark the host of your mama was it and we got yeah i don't know what the that's what people do
01:17:09.860
i don't even understand this critique they have to understand that the first the the intro it's it
01:17:16.020
shows our names it doesn't say our names so i am always in like audio mode because that's how the
01:17:20.980
majority of people listen to my show so i'm i announce our names that's what you do and for the
01:17:24.820
record and for the record i come with energy as opposed to these guys who are so fucking boring it's
01:17:28.580
painful yeah what is there what was their critique of this i don't even understand keep playing this
01:17:32.180
just that he it was two intros because we had host of better off dead we got mark random the host of
01:17:38.180
my mama and we got top lobster host of top lobster.com fat comic dave just disappeared for a second
01:17:44.900
so aside from all the cracking up you're already doing over nothing right we already went through
01:17:50.420
that during the intro okay good point yeah we pointed out who everyone is they all got their own
01:17:54.820
stupid spot doing someone stupid visually and we got to introduce them again so i was already pissed
01:17:59.140
with him no i agree one well and also the fact that like we know we feel from their other things
01:18:02.900
oh that's that liberty lockdown oh okay yeah of course oh toad's here sweet all right cool i like
01:18:08.420
these guys already they're actually right none of them have any notoriety except for maybe this guy
01:18:13.620
mark randam which i'll get into the best part the one guy that they can't they can't pronounce his name
01:18:19.620
i love random but he literally has the smallest follower count out of all of us so like i mean
01:18:24.820
don't get me wrong he might have a real world some sort of following better than like i'm not saying
01:18:28.500
twitter is the only indicator but i'm saying like it's more indicative of your research like it's very
01:18:33.540
simple go to twitter look up people's followers counts that's typically what you do with any sort
01:18:36.820
of personality i i know clint has a bigger following than the podcast itself does he have a bigger
01:18:40.740
following than the actual podcasters on here too the hosts of the their podcast together i don't
01:18:45.300
think they have they don't even they don't even have twitters they only have this
01:18:48.020
shit yeah oh really what the hell that's why when i have 20 times they're following and they're like
01:18:55.700
you know my favorite my favorite part about this though is that that toad was so gleeful that they
01:19:02.900
were uh denigrating me like he was so happy about that he's like he's like i gotta find it
01:19:08.820
yeah he's like we gotta play this because they don't they think that nobody knows clinton that's
01:19:11.860
fucking awesome i love to mention i thought perception shut up yeah i i do go to sorry
01:19:16.660
bud i just okay but anyways uh i did that felt wrong but anyways uh i feel their perception was
01:19:22.500
colored by misinformation uh because for one they they thought random was a host which is weird
01:19:28.340
because they clearly watched at least two episodes because they referenced our episode with ryan's not
01:19:32.100
a host i mean like he's like a regular but he's not read and we added random yeah anyways they thought he
01:19:38.180
was a host which i i get it i mean i love random but like if he was a host and this was a regular
01:19:43.860
these would be a lot of these would be fair critiques somebody said it was a hit piece by gas
01:19:48.020
digital yeah oh if lewis brought onto it that'd be so great no no yo they said they said it was yep
01:19:52.900
they said it was swampcast which i i then immediately go to my no no no no no swampcast you're mixing up
01:19:57.940
you mean uh simpcast no they said they said simpcast they don't know they said it was somebody
01:20:03.300
named they said it's the male version of simpcast it's in the first 30 it's in the first 30 seconds
01:20:09.780
of it they said it was swampcast and i immediately go to my twitter and i look and there and swampcast
01:20:13.860
is following me swampcast put our name in their bucket to tear down that's a fact i think tear
01:20:20.580
down i don't even know who they are they're swampcast is swampcast is the guys from uh that's uh duke
01:20:25.780
and uh mitch wait them yeah there's no way they were maybe it wasn't maybe it wasn't swamp but i
01:20:32.100
think it was i don't understand this show what is the point of this show that they're doing i don't
01:20:37.380
this right here what we're doing right now is the point of their show you know you know the only
01:20:42.820
hey real talk real talk the only thing lower than doing this podcast is reviewing this podcast but
01:20:49.940
but but then there's also we also know somebody who's even lower than these
01:20:53.780
fucking scumbag slime balls and he's an attorney and he reviews exclusively libertarian podcast oh good
01:21:02.420
you know how low you have to get to just be doing that unbelievable good i'm glad clint was talking
01:21:07.620
about tyler because i thought he was going to say me no no you review with libertarian podcast what's
01:21:12.260
even what's even no i'm just oh he would just be like what's you know what's lower than this toad
01:21:17.940
and then just believe tyler is toad and he's okay you don't get any lower yeah the worst you can get is uh
01:21:23.620
reviewing this show but what if you did a show reviewing another show about reviewing this show
01:21:28.980
well let's be like yeah this is reviewception yeah how deep can we go down this hole before nobody
01:21:34.980
watches every week before before we have tyler's show that nobody watches your butt hole how deep can
01:21:40.740
you go down that hole for nobody watches is there one more one more segment of this that's at all
01:21:44.980
interesting oh go ahead none of it was interesting but i mean i thought i i honestly i thought they made
01:21:50.580
some really good yeah they actually did they did can we go down the good points i just want to hear
01:21:54.260
because i'd rather uh actually the good points the good points were that mark is out of his
01:21:58.340
fucking mind all the good points are just about random for no reason like just like only play the
01:22:04.100
shit that's bad about you because they really they dove into you and i agree with everything real real
01:22:08.180
quick on the random thing they are i love random but as i was alluding to when we were i don't know
01:22:12.660
maybe it was our ryan episode but i was talking about like with him and maybe even it was actually on
01:22:17.300
a random episode it's like you almost it's like fire it's like you you have to it's really like
01:22:22.260
handling random is a you have to be up to the task as a host so sometimes it comes it doesn't
01:22:27.540
work out so well sometimes you nail it like he is legit well it's all it's also dependent on his
01:22:33.140
like his mental state at the time you know you just never know what you're gonna get which is why he
01:22:36.980
is random and it's fun yeah yeah right so half the episode they were saying random is schizo which is
01:22:41.460
a that is correct and so this the next they're like this guy this guy sounds like a school shooter we're
01:22:46.740
like uh-huh yep the next thing i have here i don't know if you want to play it or not they said that
01:22:50.740
top lobster was gonna leave the show yeah that's true play it yeah that's not true but actually
01:22:58.340
and whatever that's why you're beloved these guys could show a little restraint and you don't have
01:23:03.060
to laugh into the mic if you're laughing honestly if there's one guy in the show who didn't talk i
01:23:09.140
wouldn't know of course because the other five are gonna make up for it and then some absolutely and
01:23:13.780
die laughing it's called fucking energy i know yeah yeah i completely disagree
01:23:18.260
it's hilarious wanting to be there every thing is the funniest thing ever even though that's the
01:23:23.940
only world these guys live yeah have you ever have you listened to other podcasts where they just
01:23:28.580
talk and like they don't really like laugh or anything like it is like i said i told you yes i
01:23:34.580
found i looked up so i saw something on twitter and i saw somebody so i looked up their podcast and i
01:23:40.420
immediately i was like okay what i don't know i never heard this person before so i was like i
01:23:44.260
looked it up and i was like i turned it on and i was like zero energy like it was like it was less
01:23:50.340
than zero energy just come in and i was like okay that's why at least we have i mean some following i
01:23:54.820
still like in my mind we still have like listen i'm gonna go ahead and say the name i'm gonna say the
01:23:59.380
name it's i don't care he's watching late god damn it jesus christ layton this is it's so
01:24:04.660
no no energy it's not even little energy it's negative energy why are we like i listen to it
01:24:10.420
i don't want to talk about alaska god damn it this is this is way too inside baseball
01:24:18.900
that's not my favorite when top takes the gloves off for a fan of ours i love it i think it's so
01:24:24.340
fucking funny yeah we just plugged this show what's his name what's the show's name late
01:24:28.180
it's it's like it's like uh can't take a critique gang that's such a it's uh it's a buffet line
01:24:35.380
review alaska edition yeah that's what clint got the sleep sounds but it's just it's just leighton's
01:24:42.820
podcast but yeah no for for real the joke thing is retarded the laugh thing is retarded like i don't
01:24:48.740
understand like i mean maybe they're saying we're like too well they want us to laugh because like
01:24:53.380
when like like when you listen to legion of skanks or something like that like they that's like i
01:24:58.900
mean to some extent it's almost like a laugh track but it's more genuine to tell the audience when to
01:25:02.740
laugh exactly they're too stupid to know so we gotta laugh for them and then they go well i mean like
01:25:10.660
someone could tell a banger like an actual really funny joke and if like say we all muted it and
01:25:15.300
didn't joke it probably legitimately would to the audience be like it bombed you know what i mean
01:25:20.260
like yeah well because because there's five of us yeah like if you're doing a solo show and you're
01:25:26.420
laughing at all of your own jokes that's a little weird it's a little weird yeah but that's not what
01:25:30.660
this is if you're by yourself talking to yourself in a room it's weird and you start laughing if
01:25:34.820
you're in the room with five people like we did last week and then people laughing i don't understand
01:25:38.260
what the critique is what are these jewish people talking about toad they only laugh at sitcoms
01:25:43.460
like but like super jewish sitcoms all right let me let me let me run down the list of the points
01:25:48.020
that they made that i thought were valid um one they said nobody knows these guys they have no
01:25:53.540
notoriety or whatever the true we don't we don't like i'm i'm barely known the libertarian circuit
01:26:00.660
who gives a in the national circuit i'm completely unknown we do have a bigger reach we have a bigger
01:26:05.540
reach than actually go ahead i'm ending presidential candidates okay so okay okay all right sorry top
01:26:11.620
top has tons of notoriety i don't okay but no number two well clint i'll just say that we
01:26:16.420
because we do have a little notoriety we do have a bigger reach than what our no right notoriety
01:26:22.020
is though yeah like we do oh yeah we go way above our weight class for some i said we're the volkanovski
01:26:27.780
fucking jake jake yeah that was a good i like that joke too um jake shields today said he would come on
01:26:33.460
adam kriegler today said he would come on like this is like two that just today look that they would do it
01:26:38.100
here here's the thing we're going to be huge and these guys are going to suck my fucking asshole and when we
01:26:44.100
are huge i'm going to invite them on and then i'm going to cancel last minute and it's going to be
01:26:47.940
so funny i'm look so they're episode 439 and they probably do one episode a week right so they've
01:26:53.780
been at this for a hundred years and they've gotten they've gotten to a point where their podcast is
01:27:00.420
fairly respectably large and their patreon they make you know pretty decent money on it but that's
01:27:04.820
as big as you've gotten off of this thing off of that long honestly they're doing they're doing
01:27:09.140
incredible i don't want to get to episode 439 and we're not where they are they're doing incredible
01:27:14.340
because they're reviewing episodes they're reviewing podcasts and they have this many
01:27:18.660
uh you know supporters and listeners and shit like they're crushing it for what they're doing
01:27:22.340
rushing it it doesn't doesn't change the fact that nobody knows who the they are they have
01:27:25.700
5 000 followers on twitter relax so all of their accusations are directed at us but it's the same
01:27:30.420
thing for them number two elijah elijah schaefer is crushing it that guy he has he's got he's making so
01:27:35.380
much money that he's buying eighty thousand dollars programs that don't work yeah he didn't even give
01:27:40.260
a fuck that's how he's literally lighting eighty thousand dollars on fire he doesn't care that is
01:27:44.900
a rich person thing to do just buy something it's like it's expensive like but it doesn't work it's
01:27:48.420
like yeah he's like 80 grand on it whatever like he could have almost bought my corvette with that
01:27:53.300
amount of money instead he was just like i'm gonna get a program that doesn't work that's that's so
01:27:57.780
wealthy it's unbelievable these guys number two level they're still trying to make their show work
01:28:01.940
yeah exactly number two amateurs we do talk over each other too much uh particularly when mark's on
01:28:06.980
it's a it's a huge problem but it's just like we have six people we have five people it's a challenge
01:28:12.500
and if we were doing it live which we did this past weekend that's not an issue uh for the most part
01:28:18.020
and uh yeah so yes we could do better there number three five rule of three what's that
01:28:23.700
rule of five yeah i genuinely think it i think this is the case and i'm not gonna be the one
01:28:28.820
that sits out every time you guys need to get in on this rule of five it's not fair that they
01:28:33.060
use randoms episode they and and they watch too they didn't say that and keep in mind they only
01:28:38.020
played one clip from ryan's episode because that was a funny ass episode so so it was so was randoms
01:28:43.620
it was just should have pulled up um it was the second yo it was the second hour of the random
01:28:48.580
episode was great they didn't pull a single clip from it except for the very very end when i did the
01:28:53.060
call back to the after this after the show was over i said i think i said to no no before the
01:28:58.580
next show started i was like clint wrangled in wrangled in random and then the second hour was
01:29:03.540
really good because yeah we crushed contained and controlled yeah it was funny transpotting yeah
01:29:08.180
they didn't do anything from it they made fun of the outro and they seemed to not even realize
01:29:11.860
that it was mark random again well it's because there's there's lore to that literally random just
01:29:19.700
made that great random made that thing randomly like he just was like hey look what i made for
01:29:25.220
you and we're like well and it's just so like i get it i understand that if this is endearing yeah i
01:29:30.020
understand it if it's like a serious thing we did and you know but this is just i think random goofing
01:29:34.340
around and we like we love random it's like part of the lore of the show so it's like that's part of
01:29:38.820
it and we get it it's it's it's ridiculous you know number three they made fun of me for being not
01:29:43.140
funny and for being long-winded which that's true true things but that's part of my that's number three and
01:29:47.780
four by the way of what clint was going to say yeah yeah number number three is that toad is
01:29:51.940
long-winded and he doesn't ever make jokes um number four number four is that uh we do fall prey to just
01:29:58.900
saying the edgy thing that isn't necessarily funny and thinking it's funny because we're just trying to
01:30:02.740
say the most up thing so talking again though yeah kind of kind of but but we're all guilty some some
01:30:08.420
of us are guilty of it sometimes yeah but i'm just saying like that is i think that's a fair critique
01:30:12.980
like we ought to try if we're going to say racial slurs it ought to be funny this is why i didn't like the
01:30:17.140
racial slur bracket because it it wasn't that funny it wasn't funny enough to say that over and
01:30:21.780
over again yeah this is how the cia puts their finger on the scale of this show this is how they're
01:30:25.540
going to do it just like this review podcast i will say i don't think anyone should ever obsess or
01:30:33.220
really try to but obviously there's always something going in your head where you're like
01:30:36.340
you're trying to be like is this funny and you're trying to hone it as you go
01:30:39.460
and we're and none of us i think here claim that we're hilarious comedians or anything we're just
01:30:43.780
riffing we're having fun some things hit some things don't it's just goofing off it is a hang
01:30:48.020
this is your this is your college dorm room after 11 or midnight uh on like a on like a friday or
01:30:54.100
saturday night that's what this whole vibe is supposed to be for the record that's why our
01:30:57.620
audience loves it and uh yeah so i do there was two great uh fucking uh comments uh one was by tyler
01:31:03.860
he said they should have watched an episode where cole is fat which i thought was pretty
01:31:06.820
yeah and then uh paul brought up he said you guys need a hot smart chick no we don't
01:31:13.300
we don't need another fucking oh get the fuck out of they don't even they don't exist paul has done
01:31:17.380
nothing paul has done nothing but be cool and changes pfp and be funny and endearing and now paul
01:31:25.300
what happened you should you should know the rules that's after i mean like we had a white woman on on
01:31:30.100
on friday it was a disaster it was a disaster we can't we can't do it again they they they don't
01:31:36.260
know their role she was supposed to you got to come in do your role she came in and read the chat i
01:31:40.500
was like lady i was like i i think speaking of catcher and elijah's show oh yeah sorry so much
01:31:48.020
caucasian and estrogen please wait too much this is the last show so after you go from here that looks
01:31:55.060
that kid looks like they had a baby together that's very weird i don't know if you can see that it really
01:31:59.700
does look like them together his producer tries his best every week to try to fit the whole logo
01:32:04.420
on his forehead and he's getting there just gotta lose a little bit more hair elijah you'll you'll
01:32:10.420
get there brother join me join me in bold town yeah back to what we did on that friday episode by
01:32:15.380
the way i found it interesting that we have only had gingers as the mailbag people and that is true
01:32:21.940
we we should not do that anymore well you're you're now the mailbag person are you a low-key ginger
01:32:26.500
oh am i i don't know are you we asked you a question did you did you when you had hair when
01:32:36.900
you had that shitty fucking bowl how is toad not good with women like because he just asked like
01:32:41.780
they asked him a question he goes like am i it's just like he thinks he's gonna be mysterious but
01:32:47.620
they just think he's retarded he actually watches the 40 year old virgin as like a template of what
01:32:56.020
titties feel feel like sandbags right i just love it all right back to the review i thought life was
01:33:01.140
like movies man damn it but i will say i really did not like the audio one i thought that was petty
01:33:06.820
like okay don't be wrong you you try i mean we're not we're not as professional as we could be with our
01:33:11.220
mic etiquette we're not mic etiquette but i guess it is kind of part of mic etiquette like not talking like
01:33:15.460
this not being like this you know like so but at the same time he was like bickering about the
01:33:20.740
volume levels it's like unless we have like a green room guy that controlled all our audio i
01:33:24.100
don't really like yeah we come in before we try to get an ear for how everyone's audio is but
01:33:28.500
yeah it's not perfect this uh all sounds like cope jose we need to do better it's a little bit
01:33:33.620
cope but i'm just saying it's like nitpicky it's very nitpicky the epitome of professionalism
01:33:38.180
this is what people come here for oh they want perfect audio levels perfect they also critique
01:33:45.860
like uh do these guys do any prep and it's like yeah we have a group chat and we send each other
01:33:50.660
ideas every time before we get together we don't want aids how dare you yeah exactly i like that one
01:33:57.220
i mean to be fair we don't we don't overthink it we don't over prepare i mean we literally just have
01:34:02.020
a group chat we dump ideas thoughts videos things like that and that's about it and we just kind of like
01:34:07.780
we show up and then we kind of like what do we want to work with this is even better the joking
01:34:11.460
even better like we don't do we don't do prep because prep is gay legitimately it's gay yep like
01:34:16.980
only people that take prep is faggot no no see no you're see you were doing good and then you over
01:34:21.940
explained the joke and then you also used a slur just for like the punch but the punch was already
01:34:26.900
there yeah i didn't i didn't even sorry i'm not a professional comedian i didn't even to be fair i didn't
01:34:31.460
even register that as a slur i just was like you know like that's just how i talk you know that
01:34:36.180
that could be the other issue is that none of you actually perceive any of these things as slurs
01:34:39.860
we actually don't know i could be the problem if you had to point your finger to somebody that
01:34:44.820
actually didn't realize something was a slur it would be me right it would be they're like
01:34:49.140
i just say things and they're like you know you can't say that in public you're like what yeah dude
01:34:53.140
i went to a my wife had a tattoo appointment a few weeks ago and i went with her and the tattoo artist
01:34:57.380
was a chick she was really cool really sweet but like when i was talking to her i kept saying like
01:35:01.460
faggot retard but not like the hard slurs because like that's kind of like normal social interactions
01:35:06.900
i don't normally drop the hard slurs but you know maybe like a retard or like a retard just slides off
01:35:11.300
the tongue like i don't even think about it you know like faggot that like i might think about a
01:35:14.660
little bit but it usually pretty much slides off the tongue as well but like i remember my wife was
01:35:18.500
messaging me at one point was like shut the fuck up and i was like what it's like every time you say
01:35:24.020
retard or faggot she's like like and i'm like i didn't even pick it up but you know but i also like i
01:35:29.460
have this part of my mind i just don't care like if you're a faggot about that i don't care
01:35:33.620
my kids my kids are running around and like cole is just going off and i'm like oh god like his
01:35:38.500
kids but he like i get i'm looking at him and i'm like he can't even help it he's just going
01:35:42.100
out hey i was also guilty of that the whole time i'm thinking to myself like oh man it's we're
01:35:47.940
fortunate that cole's kid is young enough like to not be able to learn how to speak so like we don't
01:35:52.020
have to worry about cole growing his kids he also doesn't have the iq to do it that's true he actually
01:35:56.500
he probably won't speak until he's like five or six years old but but topskids i'm like his first
01:36:01.540
words on the podcast he just comes up i came on her like that was good that you used in the right
01:36:13.860
because it was like a baby it's first word being it's funny um all right sorry you guys want to move
01:36:19.140
on i don't know wait i want to just say like what their so their critique about the talking over to and
01:36:24.420
all that it's like i understand that in any other kind of format like if people are debating and
01:36:28.260
they're talking over each other we're not debating these people don't have they don't have male
01:36:32.580
friends every group of male friends that i've had with with a group like this if you when you're in
01:36:37.380
person right because this is odd this is internet but when you're in person you're talking everyone's
01:36:41.860
talking you better cut in you better be like either loud or have an interesting voice that cuts in and
01:36:46.980
then everybody fades back yes that's how normal people talk these people must have boring
01:36:51.220
fucking friends imagine sitting in a room with them all four of them waiting to talk they probably
01:36:54.980
got like a little thing that they pick up i'm ready to talk they'll hand here's the talking pencil you
01:37:00.500
and here's the reality too these two guys are sitting in some apartment in new york paying
01:37:05.220
sixty five hundred dollars a month barely can afford food and but they're looking at each other in the
01:37:09.540
eye so it's really easy not to talk talk over each other they're both they're both giving each
01:37:13.540
other hand jobs because they can't have prostitutes i mean like their their lives are miserable so
01:37:18.100
literally what they do is they sit there they find podcasts that are better than theirs they
01:37:21.220
talk shit about them and then they fucking jerk each other off and they go to sleep in a closet
01:37:24.820
because they don't even have a bedroom and they also don't have a dining room table because they
01:37:27.540
can't fucking afford one because they live in a fucking studio together so it's tragic ultimately
01:37:31.300
it's tragic so the entire time i listen to this i feel fucking bad for these guys but then i'm like
01:37:35.060
hey we have a sponsor that could probably help you and that's the dough razors take your
01:37:38.740
fucking own life uh are they still a sponsor i assume so the dough razors
01:37:42.500
yeah they have a code dot com promo code tower gang yeah that's right yeah 15 off and and yeah
01:37:51.220
and and if you are a black man the no the dough razors are so sharp that you can simultaneously
01:37:57.140
shave your balls and give yourself a vasectomy because you know that that baby is going to
01:38:01.540
either be aborted or become fatherless so jesus christ that was rough but go on
01:38:06.580
so he worked on that one too he's he's been thinking about that he's like i got him we're
01:38:15.860
we're better off this way help control the black population oh my god say the n-word
01:38:20.740
the dough see this is like gratuitously going to racist you know what they were right
01:38:31.060
you know i do i i was i was gonna make the joke out and i thought this would be good but
01:38:36.180
the toe destroyed like just went in there destroyed i was gonna say like they have like a you know
01:38:40.660
they have a nice metallic with the knurled steel like handle that you can't shove up your ass because
01:38:45.940
it'll hurt too much making shit up gnarled yeah knurling that's what it's fucking called is that
01:38:51.380
a thing that he just did something gay or gay g-n-a-r-l no it's k-n-u-r-l-e-d
01:38:57.460
cold stop stop looking at me stop looking down on us because you know a word we don't stop it
01:39:04.100
wow i thought i was i thought i was i mean i was trying to make a joke about how you can't shove
01:39:07.940
that uh like a gillette gillette's gay because you put it up your ass no dough not gay you cannot
01:39:12.500
put that up your ass without destroying it wait cole is right are they all really trying to look
01:39:18.260
just up and see if i got it right he's trying to put that shit up holy shit you're right i think i've
01:39:23.540
been saying it wrong forever i always call them the gnarles because g-n-a-r will be like
01:39:27.140
gnarly or something like a tree's gnarly that's what they call like on like on barbells the like
01:39:31.940
the the yeah yeah i knew what you were talking about that's knurling yeah i always thought it was
01:39:36.100
normal a small nose a word i don't get the fuck out of here hit the hit the uh uh look it's right
01:39:43.380
there look at look at the barbell that's right so that's the knurling projecting knob or ridge yeah
01:39:48.980
top please hit the horn because like this is a really big moment
01:39:57.380
it's a little bit of engineer and he comes out like no it's knurling
01:40:01.940
i thought he was talking about the top part and i was like how deep are you putting that in play
01:40:07.780
no it's the handle because you can put the like the
01:40:10.340
fucking gay ass uh shaving places they just use some silicone that's in the shape of a penis the
01:40:16.980
nadeau no way they're like we're going super manly you know this is how you know cole got the grippy
01:40:21.060
because if his butthole was loose it would just like kind of go over them yeah i put it in razor
01:40:26.340
first what you talking about to be fair i just throw it in there cole only knows what the word neural
01:40:32.180
means because it applies to both things that he does most often which are go to the gym and put
01:40:37.780
things in his butt i just had a genius idea what are you talking about yeah i i think we need to
01:40:42.740
one of these meetups get cole to put the nadeau razor in his butthole and shave one of our faces
01:40:49.540
oh i know what you're saying oh my god that's how you get a pink guy for real for real
01:40:55.620
that is disgusting imagine that act like you can't see your butthole you can do it at an angle where
01:41:00.020
you just and then you kind of zoom out and you see it stick it out of a butt kind of like the forest
01:41:03.380
mommy's parkler video and then you see you moving your ass up and down if that is if that is not
01:41:10.020
i got the tagline when you don't have lube but you do have poo n-a-d-e-a-u na-do
01:41:17.380
if if that's not the best ad for a shaving company in the world i mean and honestly
01:41:22.500
it meets the eye it meets it meets dei because it's a gay guy it will not no i'm not gay but it's
01:41:28.500
like sure you're not sure you're not well and i talked about black people using it so it's all
01:41:36.660
i see the commercial already in my head you see that that you just zoomed in
01:41:40.180
yeah it's like shaving and you're kind of like ah yeah and then you just slowly pan out and then
01:41:44.580
you see it's sticking out of your dude's ass going to shake it up and down
01:41:49.140
they're going to sponsor our jack auschwitz bits where where uh you put the nadeau shave razor in your
01:41:55.060
butthole and then we you shave an orthodox jew's face you shave his beard off with it oh man by
01:42:00.900
the way they're freaking out about something going on in my window back here i've been watching but
01:42:04.260
they they say i'm about to get abducted i don't know if there's been like lights going off back
01:42:07.780
there yeah i haven't told you because i was hoping you'd get abducted they get up there and they
01:42:13.060
anal probe me and they're like jesus it's like this link will be in the description today uh nadeau
01:42:18.500
shavecoat.com promo code tower gang check it out thank you so much cole's cuck hole corner and then cole
01:42:24.500
i saw another one it was uh cole's knurling corner uh which i thought was pretty funny but
01:42:28.900
do we have a cole's corner today or now i have they're always ready they're always ready to go
01:42:32.820
i'm just gonna put that out there they are always no no no no no no no no you dump so many you have
01:42:37.220
to fucking narrow it down we have a million videos though we have a million videos to play and we're
01:42:41.540
at an hour 45 guys we're an hour 45 i'm surprised jose hasn't stopped us to tell us that we're
01:42:46.500
there oh i don't believe oh you're off yeah i'm off tomorrow yeah all right fuck it let's go play
01:42:52.100
some videos all right all right all right but you know for real cole the whole idea is you were
01:42:58.660
supposed to pick ace ones you were literally supposed to curate these you're not just like
01:43:02.820
they are just grab something there yeah no they're curated they're ready to go all you should do is
01:43:07.620
just dip your it's like literally just like if i gave you like a uh a candy like a bucket full of candy
01:43:12.740
and i was like i picked all these candies for yourself you just put your hand in grab whatever
01:43:16.420
you want out it's perfect that's all you know cole's cole's clip corner has that grippy yo he's
01:43:21.780
like yo he's got the confidence he's like you put your hand in there it's not coming back out it's
01:43:30.500
we can close out the episode with the answering the question that was posed uh related to this video
01:43:36.820
real quick before we get into it i do want to point out i i will give these guys credit to get back
01:43:42.260
review thing it is kind of a semi i don't know if it's a genius but smart concept because it's like
01:43:48.420
i don't know to what extent they're being honest and like or overdoing it maybe to be overly nitpicky
01:43:53.860
maybe that's not the case i haven't listened to any other other episodes but it's pretty smart you're
01:43:57.540
reviewing podcasts they get upset they do exactly what we did what we talk about it's free press
01:44:02.580
everywhere it's kind of engagement bay it's an enragement wall again but it's for being
01:44:08.340
but smart i guess i gotta say it's a semi-smart it's kind of like that period of time where we
01:44:12.500
were like really pissing off a lot of party people and we really don't give these jews the satisfaction
01:44:17.700
but i will say i don't find it in organic i don't find it to be an organic following because it's like
01:44:23.380
you don't you know what i mean because you just end up with a rotating group of my favorite my favorite
01:44:27.060
thing about my two my two favorite things about this one tyler does the same thing but because there's
01:44:32.660
no fans of libertarian podcasts it doesn't matter it never creates any sort of buzz um but two these
01:44:39.060
guys have have a three-star review on apple podcast which is all fans of other shows they've talked
01:44:44.820
shit to that they get sent to there to give them a few bombs just over and over and over again it's
01:44:50.580
fucking awesome man the the only time anybody listens to their show is when they're hating on
01:44:54.580
that person exactly and i'll never listen to it again for the record i hope they do liberty
01:45:00.820
lockdown next oh yeah yeah bring it on bring it on i bet they would like it like this is actually
01:45:05.460
pretty high quality this is actually this is kind of boring i like this guy doesn't talk over himself
01:45:12.180
at all this guy reminds me a lot of who i voted for sleepy joe i didn't laugh once this wasn't funny
01:45:19.620
at all five stars from liberty lockdown this guy is no notoriety whatsoever all right did we vamp
01:45:26.820
long enough for you toad oh you're not bringing up the the corner shit are you you're bringing up
01:45:30.180
something else no no i don't have that ready this is the last thing i have logging on to a
01:45:34.660
drop the last thing you have there's a million things in the in the chat well
01:45:43.060
you know how our show goes oh this is so awesome man
01:45:47.140
yeah so we have this lady was like anything i did he was digging it so i got two heads
01:45:52.020
she actually got she actually got three heads actually
01:45:58.900
all right so the hypothetical someone posed was would you rather have a chick with two heads or
01:46:04.740
two pussies that's cool that's called that's called a callback you uh whose podcast is this
01:46:10.980
anyway guys you don't know what the you're doing all right you're out there in rochester new york like
01:46:15.220
a bunch of faggots you're probably inside of each other while you're podcasting that's why you guys have
01:46:19.460
such great chemistry and then you're gonna sit here and tell me about my comedy prowess i could
01:46:23.540
imagine i think one just i can imagine them like one dude was sitting on the other dude like like
01:46:28.500
dog like just sitting on his uh his cock and like they're just talking over his over his shoulder and
01:46:32.820
that's why that's why they don't that's why they don't talk over each other because like as soon as one
01:46:36.900
of them wants to talk they just put their dick in the other one's mouth well right one mic there
01:46:41.460
like the levels are perfect of course they're perfect of course they're perfect yeah right now we're actually
01:46:46.340
looking at the hosts of that show all right so i'll answer the question i would uh personally as
01:47:03.860
a fan of blowjobs i'm definitely going two heads plus you can knock you can knock her out you only
01:47:08.580
have to swing once um you can knock two broads out that's pretty cool it's efficient um yeah there's
01:47:14.500
lots of reasons i like it i'm going two heads because i'm so short one can be sucking me off
01:47:18.340
while i'm making out with the other one i'm going to go two pussies and not because i necessarily
01:47:23.460
actually care about having two because you can only put your dick in one at a time it really is like
01:47:26.740
i mean i guess it'd be a fun novelty but it's really like the pretty much every conjoined twin is like a
01:47:32.340
freaking nature and disturbing to look at so i guess theoretically it was a hot chick with two heads and like
01:47:37.380
i guess but i i mean i don't know even then like it's two women still basically no that's awful here's
01:47:43.220
here's the worst one somebody pointed out but i didn't have this i had this beforehand was one
01:47:48.340
two heads means double the talking i just want to put that out there exactly that's happening
01:47:52.100
regardless it's double they probably talk over each other a lot too yeah yes they would
01:47:56.980
they had a podcast this this other guys would really destroy him about it
01:48:00.580
shut up thing one no you shut up thing two i gotta put a cock in one of your mouths
01:48:08.580
uh but two pussies just means that like at you can always i feel like they would be on different
01:48:14.180
cycles because i think that's how it works or whatever no that's not that's the opposite how
01:48:17.620
it works there's there's just no way that's how it works but go ahead no no because i mean
01:48:23.860
my head canon in my head canon it has two different cycles so there's always
01:48:30.580
you can always just look one of them at least okay you know theoretically you could have two
01:48:34.580
they i've heard of cases where they have two uteruses but you still would have like it's based
01:48:39.860
on your hormone levels and stuff you're cycling so you still would cycle i would assume you'd still
01:48:44.260
cycle the same yeah when two chicks even if you have two uteruses when two chicks are together and
01:48:49.540
they're not even fused together their cycles align so like what do you think is going on here's what
01:48:53.700
i'm saying though this is this is a question posed by me so i said either two heads or two pussies and i
01:48:58.340
didn't just mean like like this how like a regular girl looks and she opens her legs and you're like
01:49:02.180
oh there's a pussy there and a pussy right there that's weird no i meant like like so see how they
01:49:06.340
were kind of like and like the other one's coming out of the head right i mean like one head and then
01:49:11.380
two two bodies like this they're just walking into each other oh it's like they have it basically
01:49:16.820
has three legs it's basically they're oh my god that is horrifying yeah that changes oh there's four
01:49:22.020
legs oh yeah i thought you meant it's two pussies between two no that's so much better that means
01:49:28.100
you get that also means you get two assholes two acts like four ass cheeks jose would be freaking out
01:49:33.220
how do you figure oh you mean if two separate okay never mind i was saying yeah two separate yeah
01:49:37.620
the other one got to sit on on her lap for it to work she's like you know how you like cross your
01:49:45.060
legs over it's like crossing double legs over and like while it's taking a shit so it's like it's so
01:49:49.620
weird this is like you're you're basically a spider like this would be great yeah one of them has to
01:49:55.540
sit on the other one's lap like imagine how fast that bitch would be oh it's great bro that
01:50:00.180
she runs like a horse too would you think she'd be running yeah faster or slower that's actually a
01:50:04.500
good thought experiment wait four legs i have some experience with horses so i could i could answer
01:50:10.260
this if you'd like but do you want to be like a pussy one of them got one of them got a real grippy
01:50:16.820
pussy the other one got a real yeah that's what that's the thing is like what if one actually had
01:50:20.820
like a better one of those black and then you got the grippy and the grainy let's go what if he
01:50:26.100
fucking like one pussy like she has two puts she but one feels way better so you just keep
01:50:29.860
fucking she's like why don't you like play with this one a little bit and you're just like ah
01:50:32.820
all right here's an important question you think she named the other body like she'd be like i'm
01:50:36.500
cassandra and i prefer my left side but this is rachel and she's a bitch like rachel's on the right
01:50:41.460
side and this is deandre it's a trance and rachel can't speak for herself because her
01:50:45.780
fucking brain is buried in this other bitch's head if she could what if what if one pussy did get
01:50:50.420
turn into like a fake dick and so she could figure herself and jerk herself off at the same time she
01:50:54.900
could fuck herself yeah just like whoa you know conjoined conjoined uh twins boy and girl
01:51:02.260
that'd be wild what if they were skits of yo then they have to would they kiss each other
01:51:08.100
you know what would be kind of gangster though if you fucking if you had conjoined twins uh
01:51:12.500
boy and girl but with that this body bullshit that we're talking about and then they had to like
01:51:16.740
they had to like find significant others that were like they would just watch the other one get
01:51:21.380
railed by the girl with one head with one yeah yeah no no no no like they're like they're they're
01:51:27.940
fucking attached at the at the shoulder right so yeah they have their whole whole shit they have
01:51:32.980
their whole shit but like they have to just like let them go get fucked by something like they're not
01:51:37.060
even gay you know none of these people have to lay next to your sister while she gets railed
01:51:40.340
can we find all the time our audience could please go out and try to find somebody who is a conjoined
01:51:48.100
twin and is doing a podcast but like maybe like a regular one like like oh i got steve mazzagotti
01:51:53.940
here on liberty lockdown today and steve's in the frame but you could tell someone's moving around
01:51:58.180
because he's connected but he knows a lot about politics his his other part doesn't really give a
01:52:02.500
shit there has to be people doing this now his other half you mean you mean the rick and morty sketch
01:52:07.620
of michael and pikell that's what that is like where one is a new show y'all are downplaying how
01:52:15.300
all right have any of you gotten head from two girls at the same time unfortunately no no no i've
01:52:19.540
gotten head from zero girls wow all right so so let me tell you uh pretty much nothing better it's
01:52:27.460
it's like it's basically like there's nothing better and these both these girls are threes
01:52:32.900
if they were separated if they were separated but yeah this is my point if you get head from two
01:52:39.220
threes you feel like like you're you know getting head from a seven or so what made them threes clint
01:52:44.260
were they fat what made them threes no he's talking about these two he's talking about
01:52:47.220
these two on the show right now me i thought you know no no no no no i did way better do you think
01:52:53.220
that they're they can't both give you head at the same time i don't think they actually
01:52:56.580
are able to physically no no no you just put your dick you you you slat your dick right in their
01:53:02.420
skull fucking slot and they just go to town dude they can't just kind of grab your scrote and then
01:53:07.620
shove it in the other one's mouth i think i think what's gonna happen yes yes jose jose has the
01:53:12.900
ingenuity to make this fucking fun yeah you don't understand cole you put your balls in the right
01:53:17.620
bitch's mouth you put your dick in rachel's mouth and you go to town so you're you're like your dick is
01:53:22.500
perpendicular to their heads and so you can do whatever you want i mean where are they gonna
01:53:27.220
go they ain't got any options that's the whole great thing about your neck i mean you don't
01:53:32.660
you don't titty fuck you neck fuck these bitches it's awesome you're just kidding me by the hair
01:53:37.060
and just you just squeeze their heads together and put it between yeah by the way this guy is
01:53:40.980
and they spit on it they spit on it and they're just like lubing up their own neck and then you oh dude
01:53:46.260
yeah this guy's living this by the way he gets this is what he looks bro i know this is why i thought
01:53:51.060
about this so deeply because i was like this guy is wild number one he got two bitches he got two
01:53:56.580
bitches to marry him they're the same bitch which is also wild they're attached which is wilder they
01:54:02.340
have to both blow them at the same time because it's not even like an option that one of them blows him
01:54:06.980
like it's definitely you get ahead from two bitches everyone likes to swallow and the other one doesn't
01:54:12.740
then you're in the money dude let me throw a wrench in here i vaguely remember because this is a years
01:54:17.140
old thing like these guys came i remember i vaguely remember my wife or someone telling me about this
01:54:20.900
this and i think he technically is only married and in a relationship with one of them and the
01:54:24.980
other one's like not his like whatever so get the fuck out but there's no way i cannot i cannot
01:54:30.660
understand how even despite that there wouldn't be at least once or twice you want to get on the
01:54:35.540
action you know she's like why did you how could you cheat on me yeah so wait so that means that
01:54:40.820
work what if each of them are married to a different guy yeah the other one can still get married
01:54:45.300
fuck dude right now she's like no if you if you did if you had to double team would you rather have
01:54:51.540
the girl with two pussies or the girl with two heads if you and you and your bro were going to
01:54:55.300
double team one would you rather have the two pussies or two heads do you have the two pussies if
01:55:01.220
another guy was involved yeah right what's that do you think they talk to each other all the time or
01:55:06.820
do they like it's like one thoughts the other thought like that i'll bet you they whisper to each other a
01:55:10.900
lot otherwise they go deaf like what if one of them's like steve's so annoying i can't fucking
01:55:18.820
every time he's around i can't stand him i think there have been cases of conjoined twins but your
01:55:23.380
brain has to be connected where their like heads are fused and i think that you kind of weirdly sort
01:55:28.020
of can hear some thought like the ones i've heard of or i'm sure something but like some thought well
01:55:33.620
imagine if your brain was joined with another individual like there would be some overlap and i mean
01:55:37.940
that's a weird thing to wrap your head around but it is i think that's i vaguely remember that
01:55:41.460
being a thing with one he's talking about conjoined twins with their heads attached and he goes that's
01:55:52.180
he didn't even mean to it was yeah oh god i was i'm still gonna go two pussies i just feel like i
01:55:58.660
mean this is the gayest answer possible go ahead no no no no no it's still to be able to like like
01:56:03.860
you can fuck a pussy and then still finger the other one that sounds pretty awesome that would get
01:56:07.780
old real quick oh wait it would get older before like the two bitches talking about you always that
01:56:15.940
are right they're gonna talk about you if you only have to punch once and they both go to sleep
01:56:22.500
no but be a man also but but then you get double battery so you're going to jail twice over no no
01:56:28.660
who's gonna believe you no you're having it you're having it's like who's gonna believe these two-headed
01:56:33.620
bitches they're their own they're their own witnesses dude i'm sorry i married i married
01:56:39.700
both these bitches and you think that i'm i'm the bad guy here i'm a saint obviously you're having
01:56:43.940
no they're gonna be like you're a weirdo you're if you go with the two pussies you're having to do
01:56:48.820
twice the work man it just doesn't sound great to me at all it's so crazy that these people even made
01:56:53.540
it this far like yeah no yeah this is a miracle of modern medicine and this what's wrong with this
01:56:59.220
country yeah like we should these people should have been tossed out at birth we would have the
01:57:04.580
the whole genetic because if they thought america was great they took this baby and they dashed it on a
01:57:09.700
rock because they're gonna and then i don't know i don't know if these things are no i don't know if
01:57:14.980
these things are like infertile or whatever or like not able to have kids these things yeah yeah
01:57:20.020
because like he's gonna they dashed it on a rock this this this this could have been solved this
01:57:25.700
could have been solved many ways with nado razors because the the the father could have had a
01:57:30.740
vasectomy giving himself with the nado trying again no i'm listing all the different ways force
01:57:37.620
this in there you you could have separated the two of them with nado just just cut them right down the
01:57:42.980
middle with it you could have done that or you could already kill our money we don't keep doing this
01:57:46.420
with them i think if they could separate them they would have already to or you could have killed
01:57:50.180
them with nado no what i'm saying i was saying he's gonna he's gonna nut in them and then most likely
01:57:55.780
they're gonna have some double-headed kids as well maybe a triple-headed kid here's my
01:57:59.220
operator is that how it works are their pronouns they them no no they're no they're actually applied to
01:58:04.900
they them yes no no no they're they them they them okay no see that's that's fucking yeah he's he's
01:58:13.620
saying that they're woke too which is even worse not only do they look like freaks but now they're
01:58:17.540
woke too look all right so here's my thesis the one on the left seems to really be happy and he
01:58:23.140
seems to be making eye contact with her the bitch on the right which is weird to say because they're
01:58:27.940
the same bitch but the bitch on the right is just like being polite she's like oh god i'm gonna get
01:58:32.660
so tonight by this guy and i am not happy about it is that what you're thinking do you think they
01:58:37.460
have to pay double for their hairdresser because i'm looking at their makeup and they did their
01:58:43.220
hair do you think of course you have like you think they have to pay their dentist double of
01:58:46.420
course they have two yeah do you think everywhere they go they're like uh like they go in there and
01:58:50.340
they're like here's the regular like here's the rate and you know we have to double it like they
01:58:55.220
like you have to be like guys we but on one person you think they get charged for two people
01:58:59.060
at like disney or something because technically or a plane or on a plane because they definitely have
01:59:03.540
different names they have only got one ass though that's true but they got different names yeah
01:59:08.980
yeah so there's like like do they have two different social security numbers can they collect social
01:59:12.740
security twice this is oh wow these are all really good questions are they getting taxed twice do they
01:59:18.420
have to fill out separate like uh w-2s like what is going on this is crazy what if one of them
01:59:26.260
and the other one's just like fuck yeah what if one likes clit stimulation and the other one likes
01:59:33.540
like penetration and they just hate like they hate the other you can never please and you can't
01:59:37.940
please them this dude's like he's fucked up his entire life really really into anal and the other
01:59:42.580
one just like i will hate i will never i will never do that yeah this guy's just drilling one controls
01:59:48.660
like the left hand one controls the right and like they're fighting over who could touch the like
01:59:51.940
one's like trying to you know that'd be hilarious and the other one's like you have one pulling him
01:59:56.580
in and the other just like punching she's like give it to me give it to me pablo and he's like
02:00:03.460
get the fuck out of here pablo you piece of shit if if one if one of them i can come now wait if one
02:00:08.500
of them wants to keep going and the and the other one is saying stop is that rape these are all very
02:00:14.100
important questions i'm glad we got to the bottom of it can we get no we didn't get the bottom we just
02:00:17.940
ask the questions we gotta get this guy or these oh bro if we could get this guy on the show i would
02:00:22.820
love that know who we should get there's a dude who has two dicks and they're big old thickies
02:00:28.100
and he does porn i bet you we could get him on the podcast can we get can we get him and a girl with
02:00:31.620
girl two of vaginas and watch them and then see like if it i think that's a high ask
02:00:36.820
that's it that's that's the end of the bit we just want to watch that yeah yeah or or him do with
02:00:41.300
because i think clint still on the opposite side of this see the guy with two dicks
02:00:44.260
fuck uh like skull fuck the two girls at the same time yeah that would be wild yeah this is this is
02:00:51.460
the type of that i need in my life like as soon as possible that's the only guy that could satisfy
02:00:55.540
these women yeah this double dick bandit double dick double dick guy double dick dude yeah triple d
02:01:00.980
double dick dude do you think they got three tits or two two i'm guessing two but if they have three
02:01:05.940
small dude money in the bank bro three like three dude you know how many times i jerked off to total
02:01:10.900
recall i'm not surprised i can't even quantify it honestly all right guys i think that's it i think
02:01:18.820
we i think we ran out of content yeah i think we thank you guys so much for tuning in if you guys
02:01:24.420
could go leave a five-star review over on apple podcast as well as spotify help us out i'd appreciate
02:01:29.460
it um and leave a one for them no no no leave them a five-star no no no no no we're not gonna like
02:01:36.740
other podcasts where we hold a grudge i'd rather you not leave them a a review at all uh don't
02:01:41.300
acknowledge their existence don't don't help them for sure no go and ask them to have us on their show
02:01:46.820
i think they already said yes they've been liking all the top stuff that he was he was
02:01:50.820
yeah they know what they're doing what was wild what was wild is they followed all y'all and they didn't
02:01:54.420
follow me they're still treating me like this guy has no notoriety 100 000. all right guys uh no way
02:02:02.180
jose show uh go check it on youtube all the major odd podcatchers odyssey rumble rumble rumble i'm
02:02:06.900
really trying to boost that rumble because i'm pretty much only posting there so far as video right
02:02:10.820
now until my uh strike has expired on youtube uh yeah follow me on twitter at towergang jose uh that's
02:02:17.140
yeah that's all i got go check out the four point boy episode watch watch watch this uh clint russell
02:02:22.580
uh liberty lockdown i had on max blumenthal today and uh yesterday i had on tom luongo they were
02:02:28.180
both great and then uh dave smith the day before that and uh rumble and uh all the other podcatchers
02:02:34.340
uh liberty lockdown thank you i don't think that was a very effective plug i don't know that's how you
02:02:40.180
plug you know go check out my friend he's got an etsy page or something i don't know here i'll do
02:02:45.220
clint i don't know why i'm clint russell of liberty or something yeah yeah clint clint's about to go
02:02:52.100
sleepy he's about to go sleepy he's about to go sleepy make sure you check out my interview with
02:02:57.940
dave i can't believe you didn't fall asleep in your interview with dave bro i was so i was so tired
02:03:04.740
during that interview but i'm glad you just woke up you just you had just awakened up but you woke me up
02:03:10.100
i needed one more hour of sleep and you broke me from it my god by the way over 8 000 views on youtube
02:03:16.020
uh about 10 000 combined views and about 11 000 audio downloads 21 000 with days in three days four
02:03:23.620
days last couple weeks clint has popped it's been pretty crazy he was showing me all of his analytics
02:03:27.940
keep in mind that all of these guys just said how boring and lame my show is and yet and yet
02:03:34.100
you could have four more viewers on every show but we just don't watch it
02:03:41.140
they think my show sucks but it's because they don't listen to it so i don't know
02:03:44.500
we've been on it it's hard i don't no no no i've i've watched it and you just just because that was
02:03:48.660
the episode y'all were on no no no no i went on the show i watched the episode like this
02:03:54.100
shit sucks i'm never watching this again i watched i watched it when i was on i watched the episode and
02:03:59.300
clint kept crying and it brought my joy down and i was like i can't do this i have to be up here
02:04:04.740
honestly liberty lockdown is not for you cole you are too joyous it's uh yeah it's talking about how
02:04:09.460
terrible the world is it's the most black filling show yeah oh fuck cole where you at where they find
02:04:16.100
you fat comic dave on twitter mostly just kind of just chilling for now but um but yeah just follow
02:04:21.940
me there all right toad tower gang toad on twitter follow tower gang pod obviously subscribe to the
02:04:28.660
locals tower gang.locals.com and i host better off dad and i will be doing something with college
02:04:34.980
it's the tower power hour slut no way jose liberty lockdown to the tower power plant bitch reed
02:04:46.580
cole top lobster and toad tower gang tower gang tower gang tower gang tower gang tower gang
02:04:53.300
tower gang tower gang tower gang liberty lock is truth say same with lobster
02:04:57.860
colon jose jose toad is sick no way jose the tower power hour sl
02:05:35.680
Libertarian won't be the same, they revolution-y.
02:05:38.420
I miss grammar, it's sending it, rhyme dubitably.
02:05:54.120
Tower Gang, Tower Gang, Tower Gang, Tower Gang.
02:06:10.400
Tower Gang, Tower Gang, Tower Gang, Tower Gang.
02:06:20.060
It's so fucking hard to line up the syllables and all that.
02:06:26.580
Tower Gang, Tower Gang, Tower Gang, Tower Gang, Tower Gang, Tower Gang, Tower Gang, Tower Gang, Tower Gang.
02:06:34.380
I will be doing a college football week one show, probably pre-recording it either tonight or tomorrow and dropping that as soon as I do.