Tower Gang - September 07, 2023Ep 141 - Semi-Cut w⧸ Gerard Michaels
Episode Stats
Length
1 hour and 48 minutes
Words per minute
210.28778
Harmful content
Misogyny
140
sentences flagged
Toxicity
1,454
sentences flagged
Hate speech
271
sentences flagged
Summary
Jose Galleson is a comedian, entrepreneur, and former pro baseball player who now works as a politician in Washington, D.C. We talk about how he got his start in comedy, what it's like to be a politician, and why he doesn't get sunburn.
Transcript
00:00:17.300
I'm trying to start a cult here, baby, so I can fit a third of my dick into Toad's mussy.
1.00
00:00:24.040
You want to kill me or you want to give me a bone? I don't know.
1.00
00:00:27.060
When I say fuck the Jews, fuck it means I'm horny.
1.00
00:00:33.320
Have you guys ever had the mythical where there's a whole thing in and then do that shit where they're like,
0.99
00:00:36.800
The three of you had a threesome of some kind.
1.00
00:00:49.040
She was a 10 in real life. She's like a dead 8.
1.00
00:01:10.060
Well, well, well. It's Wednesday again. 9-11, as usual. Nice to see it's not 9-11. It's like 9-45.
1.00
00:01:21.260
No, you should definitely just gaslight all of this. It's 9-11, guys. We did it. We're on time.
00:01:26.480
I was telling our guests, you know, I'm doing this to myself. Do you see that? I'm cutting myself off from finishing the intro. Yo, we are Tower Gang, man. I am Top Lobster. To my right is Tower Gang Toad. We got Jose Galleson. Underneath me is the great Cole. And a very special guest tonight. He's a podcaster on Gas Digital. He's an entrepreneur. He's a comedian. He's a politician. I think he was on some food eating shows before.
00:01:56.480
Bro, that's how your wife knows me, man. Come on.
00:02:00.600
That hurts. That hurts. So, where do we know you from? Like, because I, so I know you from Gas Digital. I know you from Gas Digital. And I know you do the podcast with Mickey Gull. And I was like, oh, shit.
00:02:13.760
Then I looked at your Instagram. And I was like, wait, this guy's doing stuff with, like, Patrick Bet David. He's like a comedian. Like, what the fuck is this guy? And I just heard that you're just kind of like, you're just a fat dude. Like, what is it?
0.99
00:02:25.920
Yeah, yeah. Well, you know, I was a pro athlete. And then I turned into a fat dude. So, I was a ball player.
00:02:35.460
Baseball player. Just as bad. Just way less athletic than any offensive lineman.
00:02:39.980
You said you're an athlete and then you said a pro baseball player. Like, all right.
00:02:44.720
Yeah, you know, the sport where you sit around and drink beer and eat fried chicken, you know.
1.00
00:02:48.700
I am not going to sit here and let a motherfucker who looks like a grown-ass bat boy fucking condescending me.
1.00
00:02:54.220
That's the best compliment I've had on the show.
1.00
00:02:56.740
Flex right now. I need to see a fucking front bicep, double bicep right now.
0.99
00:03:05.380
We're on the right path, guys. Listen, it's early.
00:03:09.520
It's one thing if you're going to fucking sit here and you're going to talk shit.
1.00
00:03:13.780
It's another thing if you're never going to go outside and get any sun whatsoever.
1.00
00:03:19.820
I must have some sun because what happened, you know.
00:03:23.740
You went out. You went out. You're so defective.
1.00
00:03:26.880
You went out in the sun once and it killed you.
1.00
00:03:32.180
To be fair, whenever I go outside, I consider killing myself, so.
00:03:38.600
It's all related to whether you're inside or outside, but okay.
00:03:41.700
Yeah, so long story short, after baseball, I kind of didn't know what to do, and then I got into pharma sales like every ex-beauty queen and failed athlete, and then I started working in government, working in politics, and I realized that really wasn't for me.
00:03:59.780
So I went into comedy because, you know, it's a lucrative career.
00:04:08.260
It's not really competitive, the comedy scene, as we know.
00:04:11.180
No, there's not really a lot of comedians out there trying to make it.
00:04:14.360
Yeah, and after 10 years in comedy, you know, I finally broke even.
0.99
00:04:29.020
Yeah, you know, the key to doing a lot of things in life is to be good at not any one of them.
00:04:36.600
And start when you're eight years old, basically.
00:04:40.700
I mean, that all explains – that explains why he looks like he's like 50.
00:04:47.800
That's the – that's the crazy thing is throughout.
00:04:49.560
I'm pretty sure Toad might be a little bit older than you.
00:04:52.460
Again, guys, guys, I don't do this – I don't do this lightly.
00:04:55.100
This is – we're not even five minutes in the show.
00:04:56.880
This is a game we play with all of our guests called Kill Toad.
00:05:01.780
We describe in which new creative way that we would kill Toad.
00:05:07.780
I do want to add – I want to add one to this.
00:05:09.260
Before Gerard goes, I'll let Gerard think of some fantastical way of killing Toad.
00:05:16.420
We found out if we somehow get Toad to not come on the show.
00:05:19.900
Like if he somehow misses the show, he will kill himself.
00:05:22.580
It was – it was – we – because Jose has now instituted the rule of five.
00:05:27.280
So he – basically, if we have a guest, we can only have four of us on.
00:05:31.400
So there's a total of five people on each podcast.
0.99
00:05:36.540
You're going to break the fucking stick and throw it in the middle.
1.00
00:05:39.100
And what – kind of – Top had an idea on how to solve it because if Clint wants to come on – so now we have six.
00:05:51.760
So – and what the thing is is we've decided that we'll all come on.
00:05:57.140
Listen, Clint blocked me on Twitter for some reason.
00:06:03.820
So what we decided was that we'll all come on, and then, like, in the first five minutes of the show, the guest chooses who to kick off.
00:06:16.380
Toad almost quit the show just by us saying – like, telling this should be the thing.
00:06:21.220
I thought Toad was going to kill himself over this.
00:06:22.680
I think we should overrule Jose's rule of five.
00:06:25.840
Dude, I actually think it's a legit good rule to have because what happens is you have too many people talking over each other and you have too many people.
00:06:33.660
It's really hard for these, like, StreamYard Zoom shows to do it.
00:06:36.240
If we were doing, like, an IRL type thing, it would be a different story.
00:06:39.220
Like, if we were all in the same studio, I think you could do six and probably get away with it.
00:06:43.420
But honestly, really, it wasn't that big of a deal.
00:06:45.640
But the more Toad protested, the more I was like, I wanted it to be a thing.
00:06:49.580
Because I know every other one of us would be like, oh, whatever.
00:07:03.080
You tweet like somebody who stays home all day, lives with their parents, and that's sad.
00:07:24.480
And then he sat out one episode, two episodes, maybe.
00:07:27.780
And then he goes, I think the rule of five is really good, but I'm not going to be the
00:07:33.820
You just made a rule, and then now you're asking everybody else to play by it?
00:07:45.700
I feel like Toad adds way more content to the show.
00:07:48.540
That's why I like the idea of rule of five or Toad, shut the fuck up.
0.99
00:07:53.880
It's not as catchy as rule of five, but we can do six because he freaks out about it.
0.98
00:07:58.380
But he has to essentially be an on-screen producer who doesn't say a goddamn thing.
0.99
00:08:02.540
And anytime he tries to, we all use him and go, shut the fuck up, Toad.
0.99
00:08:07.920
Toad, how do you feel being emasculated by a man who put a landing strip on his chin?
1.00
00:08:17.080
Well, I'm at least taller than him, so I have that going on.
1.00
00:08:20.720
You actually, in fact, are not, you lying sack of shit.
1.00
00:08:24.620
You're like a half inch shorter, and it's such a dumb flex.
0.99
00:08:29.620
The dumb flex was the bicep flex I already did.
0.93
00:08:32.380
Do you think that if Jose, with that landing strip, eats out another girl with the landing strip,
0.92
00:08:36.660
it gets stuck like Velcro, and he has to rip it off?
00:08:41.020
He's just like, sorry, babe, I can't stop eating you out.
00:08:47.080
Really, it's a sensory thing for nighttime pussy eating, so you can kind of just feel
0.99
00:08:57.120
Two, I don't really grow a great mustache, so I just shave it off.
1.00
00:08:59.240
It's very like Dagestani, like these motherfuckers out there.
1.00
00:09:03.240
He looks like he's got a great double leg, doesn't he?
00:09:06.900
Everyone that could wrestle in the UFC just takes off their fucking mustache.
0.99
00:09:11.880
Yeah, dude, the end of Dagestani in the UFC is like a superpower because they don't drink,
0.98
00:09:16.260
they don't do drugs, they don't chase pussies.
1.00
00:09:19.520
These guys just wrestle bears and accumulate top game control and just the most boring 20-0
00:09:29.560
Dude, it's funny, too, because I remember Rogan talked about this.
00:09:32.340
He said basically like, I think it was Rogan or Sean Strickland maybe said it, which is
00:09:37.000
But he was like, these guys, all these Dagestanis come over here and they'll make like 20 grand
0.99
00:09:42.040
and they'll move back to Dagestan and they're like the richest motherfuckers around.
0.98
00:09:46.680
And they're just like, I do what I do my entire life, I wrestle, I make 20 grand, now
0.98
00:09:54.640
Yeah, I heard Khabib lives in like a 2,500 square foot house, man.
00:10:06.780
You know, like it's, yeah, I don't give a shit, dude.
1.00
00:10:08.560
This is what these motherfuckers be doing in Dagestan, all right?
1.00
00:10:17.460
Unfortunately, that reminds me of my New York Giants boat trip that we haven't recovered
00:10:23.020
Wait, were you talking about the one that fucking...
0.99
00:10:30.420
Oh, they were definitely, they were wide receivers by the end.
00:10:34.220
That really was the beginning of the end of the New York Giants right now.
00:10:41.820
I think they went like 11 and 60 after that picture was taken.
00:10:53.680
Like, it's like his rookie season, they're like, this guy's kind of good.
00:10:59.700
It's like Sterling Shepard's knees saw that picture and were like, pause.
00:11:05.100
And that happened, like, right before a playoff game, wasn't it?
00:11:09.280
It was their bye week before a playoff game where they got smoked by Aaron Rodgers.
00:11:14.860
At least they didn't do it until after they beat Tom Brady twice.
00:11:20.340
Did an opposition team release it or did they do it themselves?
00:11:28.620
It was the worst thing that happened on a boat outside of Jose Fernandez for any athlete ever.
1.00
00:11:35.940
Jose probably has no idea what we're talking about.
1.00
00:11:45.440
He was on his way to becoming the best pitcher in baseball.
00:12:02.660
And he went out on a speedboat, got high on his fucking cocaine.
1.00
00:12:08.480
And just, like, all the way up, just going as fast as he could.
00:12:18.780
And then one of the, like, coolest things that ever happened in sports is the next game.
00:12:27.720
He had never hit a home run or something like that.
00:12:38.700
I wish there was more than 11 people at the Marlins stadium.
00:12:44.700
Were they in the new stadium with that disgusting statue in the outfield?
00:12:51.480
They spent, like, $14 million of taxpayers' money for that thing.
00:13:03.640
I instituted a rule of four when sports talk starts.
00:13:29.900
I'm going to line up 400 fat chicks, and I'm going to fuck you to death.
1.00
00:13:39.960
I don't know if your blood's going to constrict.
0.98
00:13:41.880
I don't know if you're just going to, like, die.
00:13:52.060
Like, we're going to line up six or seven Lizzo's and just let it rock for two hours.
00:13:59.440
You guys ever see that chick that did, like, the biggest gangbang ever?
1.00
00:14:03.000
It would be, like, the reverse of that, but for the dude or whatever?
00:14:16.460
Dude, I'll, like, have my bed covered in pillows and shit, and I'll imagine that I'm,
1.00
00:14:23.220
What's the biggest broad you've ever been with, Toad?
00:14:25.020
What's the biggest broad you've ever been with?
0.97
00:14:46.900
I'll get you six fat chicks, and it'll be the best $100 I ever spent.
1.00
00:14:50.200
Like, virtually all of the answers to Kill Toad take my virginity.
0.97
00:14:59.760
Everybody that does it, we're doing you a huge favor.
0.99
00:15:04.980
Because the first nut you have might kill you, actually.
00:15:17.620
We'll have, like, this wall full of swords or different kinds of weapons.
00:15:31.600
And then if I win, I get your land and your wife and all that other stuff.
00:15:45.180
Can I just kill him and just not take his shit?
1.00
00:16:01.800
If you survive, they get progressively hotter as you go.
00:16:06.200
So, we'll start with, like, 600 pound, my big fat life, TLC.
00:16:19.120
And then if you survive that, we get into Latinas.
00:16:25.280
The crazy thing, though, is, like, as you get further into hotter, they're going to get
00:16:31.560
less quality, like, lays, but you're already going to have nutted.
00:16:35.740
So, it's like you need a higher quality lay to build a nut.
00:16:38.380
So, it's like the further, it's like the higher the difficulty level becomes, essentially.
00:16:42.200
To where, like, you can't progress to the next.
00:16:53.620
And if he doesn't, then we get to cut off a limb.
00:17:14.620
We get all you guys, we get all the tower gang guys and, like, the little black masks
1.00
00:17:27.720
How many of these fat black chicks do you think you could fuck?
1.00
00:17:31.560
Do you think you could fuck enough of them consecutively to make Gerard run out of money?
1.00
00:17:36.640
Look at Gerard's face and does he look like a guy with a lot of money?
1.00
00:17:39.680
This is the bet that you've got to make in your head.
00:17:44.620
So, I mean, it's, I mean, you have to fuck a lot to get rid of all.
1.00
00:17:47.680
That's like, he already said six, he already said six women for $100.
1.00
00:17:52.780
So, these are cheap prostitutes like this.
1.00
00:17:58.760
And I paid for Toad's merch, I'm sorry, for Lobster's merch all at once and up front.
0.99
00:18:07.620
But I really like this ladder thing of like, you start low and you just fuck.
1.00
00:18:12.460
Because that first nut, I guess it's also like, can you nut from a 600 pound woman?
1.00
00:18:19.880
It's because the hotter they get, the more he's going to want to do it.
00:18:25.920
No, but actually, it's going to be so frustrating for him.
00:18:33.120
So, he's told this and our audience is probably going crazy already.
00:18:36.080
This man has jerked off 32 times in one day.
0.99
00:18:43.460
I mean, imagine you add like lubrication and pussy.
1.00
00:18:49.540
Can you imagine losing your security deposit because there's just loads of cum all over you?
1.00
00:18:56.860
All right, what the fuck has been going on in here?
1.00
00:19:05.320
It looks like Burning Man in your fucking apartment.
1.00
00:19:07.300
It looks like fucking Burning Man, but it's cum.
1.00
00:19:09.940
Wait, do you guys see how ridiculous the rule of five is now?
1.00
00:19:14.940
You presented this rule and then volunteered toad.
00:19:21.140
There was multiple times just in the past five minutes talking over each other.
00:19:30.820
There's some people that can't handle chewing out loud.
00:19:35.980
And there's some people that when people talk over each other, it drives them out of their mind.
00:19:39.720
It's the number one comment I've gotten on podcasts since I've been doing this for five years.
00:19:45.000
It's a fucking conversation, you ADHD motherfucker.
1.00
00:19:49.240
If it's that hard for people to ascertain what's going on here, put it on 0.5 speed.
1.00
00:19:54.980
Or, I don't know, grow the fuck up and understand context.
0.75
00:20:01.540
The whole world doesn't revolve around you, you stupid, fucking arrogant cunt.
1.00
00:20:10.980
And it sounds like, when they're talking to each other, it sounds like they're podcasting from a test tube.
00:20:21.080
And one of their critiques was that we speak over each other.
00:20:26.380
And because we're trying to make interesting, exciting content.
1.00
00:20:28.640
These motherfuckers are like the most sterile-
1.00
00:20:35.800
Bro, nothing in this fucking world bothers me more than the critics criticizing for criticizing's fucking sake.
0.99
00:20:43.400
Yelp is the biggest mistake to ever happen in the fucking history of the world.
0.99
00:20:47.880
What makes you think you have the right to tell some fucking Michelin star chef what he got right and what he got wrong?
1.00
00:20:55.020
Just eat your fucking food and either go back to the place or don't.
1.00
00:20:58.360
If the place is gross, tell people it's fucking gross.
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00:21:01.680
But if you ever read a Yelp review, we showed up for a beautiful Friday evening.
1.00
00:21:12.800
Everybody on ESPN has never played a fucking sport in their life.
1.00
00:21:16.100
Mina Kimes just got two million fucking dollars.
1.00
00:21:19.500
Social justice warrior Mina Kimes just got two million fucking dollars after they fired everybody in the whole place.
1.00
00:21:30.940
But she's going to tell these grown-ass men how to play football.
1.00
00:21:37.500
How much did, in fairness, I'd play some handballs with her for sure.
0.99
00:21:53.460
All these commies talk about solidarity, social justice, but also break me off, huh?
0.99
00:21:58.360
You know, hey, look, I'm feeling for you out there, but, yo, you said two million, right?
0.98
00:22:02.740
Make sure you don't get that extra fucking five dollars, neither.
0.95
00:22:10.220
Shannon Sharpe makes me think of that, like, the black people really are Jews.
0.88
00:22:13.460
Like, with that nose, he's got, like, the most, like, pronounced nose that I've ever seen.
0.61
00:22:20.460
How loud do you think Shannon Sharpe gets in the movie theater?
1.00
00:22:25.520
Like, that motherfucker's, I love Shannon Sharpe.
1.00
00:22:27.040
I'm a Broncos fan for my whole life, and so Shannon Sharpe was, like, my guy.
0.99
00:22:34.480
Just don't go see Madea, and you won't have to worry about it.
00:22:37.500
Everybody's screaming like it's a Rocky Horror Picture Show.
00:22:40.440
Yeah, I want to see Deion, Shannon Sharpe, and, like, Stephen A. Smith all go watch a movie together in the theater.
00:22:52.240
I would listen to primetime read a fucking parking ticket.
1.00
00:22:56.400
He's entertaining, but I'm just saying just those, because they're loud.
00:22:59.540
I mean, they're just, and then they were just in, like, a horror movie, just those three.
00:23:09.300
I'm trying to think of other loud fucking black dudes.
1.00
00:23:11.380
I wonder, do they get louder the bigger they are?
1.00
00:23:16.320
There's a big fuck around and find out aspect to that.
0.99
00:23:20.940
There's, like, you know, are you, Toad, going to ask Shannon Sharpe to please quiet down during
00:23:29.560
He'd probably be, like, this motherfucker keeps talking to me.
1.00
00:23:37.480
Dude, I got really pissed once when I was, it was the third time I saw the Simpsons movie
1.00
00:23:42.260
in the theater, and these three black dudes.
0.99
00:23:49.100
They did not have tickets to the Simpsons movie.
0.81
00:23:51.440
They were at some, they were in some, this is not an ailment.
00:23:55.800
They came in midway through this movie and decided to disrupt it, and they were just talking
00:24:09.900
Does that mean you gave them a head to shut them up?
1.00
00:24:11.660
Does that mean you've sucked them off to shut them up?
0.99
00:24:20.720
No, I thought I was going to get my ass kicked.
0.99
00:24:24.500
It was going to be the three of them versus me and one other white guy.
0.69
00:24:28.840
You just took like 10 minutes to describe a story of every black person encounter that everybody
00:24:34.580
I know, but it's funnier because it's me telling it.
00:24:45.340
Jack says, Toad's the type of nigga to claim that he's written six million lines of code,
1.00
00:24:57.020
The coding jokes are getting overused, overdone.
00:25:01.160
And if you really wanted to make a joke, you could talk about the number of lines that
00:25:05.120
I've deleted because I've committed a code holocaust, man.
0.99
00:25:17.960
Audience, you're forbidden from asking Toad questions directly in the mailbag.
00:25:22.320
If I see you doing that, I'm giving your money back.
00:25:26.880
I'm the one who reads the mailbag, so I'm in control, but I choose three every time.
00:25:33.780
We only have three tonight, so that's why we need you just to like sit there and not
00:25:40.860
Conspiracy extremist tops the type of nigga to go to war with every prominent libertarian
1.00
00:25:46.720
personality on Twitter and still show up to all the libertarian events with big dick
0.99
00:25:59.300
I saw the guy at the Dave Smith show, and he was like looking at me sideways, and he
00:26:05.040
He was like, oh, you blocked me on Twitter.
1.00
00:26:06.340
I was like, well, you were probably acting like a bitch.
1.00
00:26:09.960
And then he wouldn't make eye contact with me.
1.00
00:26:13.400
Top is the crazy, because he was telling me about the whole thing with the, we talked
00:26:21.920
But Top just went up to, like, so Gerard, what happened is Top found a pair of, like,
00:26:26.460
dirty panties after we all came to his house one time, and no one fessed up.
00:26:30.440
And so, he went up to the girl that he thought it was, like, he hadn't seen this girl since
00:26:35.420
He just went to her and be like, hey, did you, did it say hi?
00:26:38.580
Did it just, hey, did you leave your panties at my house?
00:26:42.400
And I was like, this dude is fucking wild.
0.99
00:26:46.500
And he was like, I think you left your dirty panties at my house.
0.98
00:26:51.380
There was like, she wasn't even sleeping there.
00:26:53.200
It was in a weird, it was, it was a whole thing.
00:26:55.200
And we had these pair of dirty panties for the longest.
00:26:57.360
And we're like, yo, who left these, like, stained, nasty panties?
00:27:04.680
And it was in the room of a girl that was staying there, but she was too big to be wearing
0.99
00:27:09.140
So, it's like, you know, Cinderella, like, whose fucking panties are these?
1.00
00:27:17.640
And she was like, Jose, you were there when I asked her, right?
00:27:28.380
She's still the prime suspect, but this is the biggest mystery in Tower Gang lore.
0.99
00:27:32.820
It's just crazy just how just bold Topp is whenever, he doesn't give a fuck.
0.99
00:27:42.620
Everybody where I grew up is exactly like that.
00:27:44.540
One of the biggest culture shocks to me was, was, you know, getting out of Jersey, getting
00:27:48.980
out of New York and Brooklyn, and having to realize the rest of the country is not like
00:27:56.060
Because the rest of the country wants to say it.
00:27:57.960
Like, I'm from the South, and so everybody, like, has a smile, but they're like, you know.
00:28:06.920
And so they don't want to be that abrasive.
0.99
00:28:08.740
They want to, like, you smile at you, bless your heart, all that shit.
0.99
00:28:11.380
But, like, and then they go, like, they see that New York, like, style, they see that
0.99
00:28:15.980
as literally just being mean, and, like, they were like, you shouldn't be like that.
00:28:20.820
Yeah, Cole, do you ever think pussy shit like that is why you guys lost the war?
1.00
00:28:27.080
Because we were, like, we're shooting back, but we're just like, hope to find you, whale.
1.00
00:28:38.240
And the northerners are just like, fuck you, you fucking slave scum.
1.00
00:28:50.120
The question to go along with that from Conspiracy Extremis is, of all tops victims, who got it
0.98
00:28:56.440
the worst, and who's your favorite, or what's your favorite highlight, I guess?
00:29:04.040
The Bueno one is kind of my favorite, because it was hilarious, the Do It Be Squirtin'.
0.98
00:29:11.480
To be fair, that wasn't Top that did it, but, like, we did.
00:29:21.380
Well, now that they've gulagged the Proud Boys, Tario, dude, is Top the brownest white supremacist
0.91
00:29:36.540
No, I was going to say Black Keeper Israelites, but they're just, like, black supremacists.
0.99
00:29:39.940
Me and Luis J. Gomez are probably, like, right there, but he don't mean it.
00:29:45.880
There was some Hispanic mass shooter recently, right?
00:29:51.240
The Puerto Rican rattlesnake's bigger than people think he is, though.
1.00
00:29:59.720
No, I'm saying he doesn't mean it, like, as far as, like...
0.65
00:30:10.460
He says all this stuff, and everybody laughs, and then he just goes, like, no, but seriously,
0.99
00:30:15.400
I spoke with Gerard and Mickey Gall on the phone when describing about, like,
00:30:19.700
what kind of merch they want, Gerard and all this stuff, and it was, like, total white
00:30:28.720
And when I hung up, I was like, fucking crackers.
0.99
00:30:35.080
We're not libertarian autistics that want to debate people online.
00:30:38.740
Keep that same energy when we meet each other in person.
00:30:56.960
I actually called Elon Musk beefing with the ADL 10 months ago on a podcast.
00:31:06.900
Well, this kind of circles back to what Top was asking before.
00:31:10.640
Like, after I got out of government, I got into comedy, and I started writing and producing
00:31:15.440
And then I started realizing, like, man, a lot of people are saying my words on TV and
00:31:22.480
Like, people are like, damn, that's smart.
0.99
00:31:23.620
I'm like, maybe I should just say my own fucking words.
0.99
00:31:28.520
And I started building a following like you guys did, despite shadow ban at the shadow
00:31:36.900
Up to, like, 60,000 people, which meant a lot to me.
00:31:45.100
So, you know, it took me years to do this shit.
0.99
00:31:50.220
But I got some really cool people that became friends that were kind of insiders.
00:31:57.260
And then, you know, you get some inside information.
00:32:00.340
And then you have to discern what's real, what's not.
00:32:02.900
And then, you know, it's just been a wild thing.
00:32:06.760
And then the PBD podcast, like you guys are saying, really amplified that.
00:32:10.180
You know, I did like 60 episodes, you know, as like, I guess the second chair you'd call
00:32:15.760
And then, you know, I got friendly with a couple people.
00:32:18.060
And one of them was like, I said something when Musk bought Twitter.
00:32:24.480
They were like, this is a good thing for free speech.
00:32:36.480
You know, he trolled all the people I want to have trolled.
0.96
00:32:41.060
You know, he gave us, you know, little fucking anti-woke cap nip for us to be like, oh, yeah,
0.99
00:32:47.140
You know, but really, to me, it just made all the sense in the world.
00:32:50.660
This was the greatest acquisition for corporate espionage of all time.
00:32:55.240
Hey, Gerard, did you see his interaction with me like a couple months ago?
00:33:02.100
Because it's a weird, thinking about that kind of psychology, how you're talking.
00:33:06.360
Like, because the response to me makes no sense.
00:33:10.560
I mean, you know, hate the Jays or adrenochrome.
00:33:13.500
It's like, hits a lot of different things.
0.98
00:33:15.300
And he decided to look at Elon Musk and comment on my shit out of everything else and say, wow,
0.98
00:33:21.860
And it's like, I've thought so long about this.
00:33:29.080
Like, my thing was like 15,000 at the time.
1.00
00:33:31.080
Well, first of all, it was fucking hilarious.
0.99
00:33:33.040
Second of all, you picked a beautiful Photoshop picture of Mel Gibson looking fucking.
0.99
00:33:41.780
The community notes on that post, it doesn't address adrenochrome.
00:33:48.540
It says, actually, this picture was taken of Mel Gibson in 2017.
00:33:56.280
I think your tweet comes full circle kind of in my career.
00:34:02.220
I did a sketch for Normal World on The Blaze with Dave Landau and Kurt Metzger and Brennan Schaub.
00:34:11.480
It is long, but I think it's fucking hilarious.
0.96
00:34:14.280
And it's like an ESPN 30 for 30 on Smear the Queer or Kill the Man with the Ball, whatever it is.
0.94
00:34:18.880
And the championship, the Lombardi Trophy that they chose was the Mel Gibson Award for Excellence.
00:34:33.680
But, yeah, I think he bought Twitter because it's corporate espionage.
00:34:48.040
Like, the reason he would want free speech on Twitter, as much free speech as is allowed by his Jewish overlords, is to continue to...
0.99
00:34:59.980
He's just gathering information of every scenario that will ever exist and implanting it into AI.
00:35:05.020
He just said that he sued another AI company for scraping Twitter data.
00:35:09.860
For his AI to link to Neuralink and whatever else he's doing.
00:35:14.160
I don't think it has to be an either-or situation.
00:35:20.000
You know, AOC was going after him pretty heavy, and then she just shut up.
00:35:23.340
I've got a feeling that, you know, he ran into...
0.99
00:35:27.200
He's like, are you sure you don't want this to get out there?
0.99
00:35:30.540
Are you sure you don't want the titty pictures you were sending to fucking Prince Harry?
1.00
00:35:36.860
Will the AI of the titty pictures have three titties?
1.00
00:35:48.200
So, rule of five, Gerard, man, you're on the table.
00:36:00.360
The bidding starts at 100 bucks, and you've got 30 seconds.
0.89
00:36:05.680
How much was that fucking super chat Toad dropped on Timcast that never was?
0.91
00:36:16.540
Yeah, I'm going to use the power of Vito, and I overrule.
00:36:28.260
I came in here not sure if I was going to like this guy.
1.00
00:36:32.480
The thing about the ADL thing, because Topp brought it up to us.
00:36:36.240
He was like, I really think if he does do the whole defamation suit against ADL, Topp's
00:36:45.760
It's going to be evidence by the ADL that he is anti-Semitic.
0.98
00:36:54.380
It's going to be in the public record that Topp Lopps tweeted out, and that Elon Musk
00:36:59.800
Bro, the ADL is just like, the ADL is one of like 50 that they have going on, man.
00:37:14.560
Yeah, it's not even about, you know, you've got Act Blue.
00:37:21.140
You've got, what's the other big one that they got there?
00:37:26.800
Well, that's the, I mean, that's obviously the epicenter of all this, and the Republicans
0.99
00:37:30.560
are fucking useless, so if they're not complicit.
0.99
00:37:36.060
Why do they all sound, why do they all sound like minor league, like leagues, like the
00:37:42.500
It all sounds like something you find that a guy has been 10 years playing baseball, but
00:37:47.320
he's like, yeah, I'm in the JDL right now, and they're like, man, that's not even single
00:37:53.580
I've got some strict rules of thumb in my life that I've come to at this point.
0.93
00:37:56.960
If a UFC fighter has an OnlyFans bet against her, you fucking never, ever, ever, ever, ever
1.00
00:38:08.080
And if it has three letters, if it's an NGO with three letters, it's fucking evil.
0.99
00:38:13.500
And if it's a guy with three names, he's an assassin.
0.98
00:38:18.520
You've got the WHO, you've got the fucking WEF, you've got-
0.99
00:38:27.380
Dude, do you know how many people Patrick Bet David is assassinated?
00:38:32.840
All I'm saying is that the rule's proven true 100% of the time.
00:38:45.280
I grew up in a very old school Brooklyn and Jersey area.
00:38:48.740
And if you're going to go to a place that you're going all the time, like you're taking
00:38:52.660
your wife out, this is the place that you go.
1.00
00:38:55.980
When you come in, you got to figure, look, I'm spending 100 bucks at least probably, right?
0.99
00:39:00.680
You come in and you fucking, when the waiter sits down, you dap them a 20 and you get first
0.98
00:39:06.020
class service and something free every day, 100% of the time.
0.99
00:39:09.240
If it's a place you're going to, you know, all the time, like don't do it at Wendy's Toad.
00:39:15.980
You know, if you got a restaurant you're going to, you got a place you go to, it's nice
1.00
00:39:21.140
It's kind of like when you're at the bar and you put down, like you want to get the bar
00:39:26.140
So you just slap down the $5 bill to begin with.
00:39:31.280
I mean, it's looking like he's going to kill you.
1.00
00:39:34.140
It's looking like he's got the type of money to kill you with fat pussy.
1.00
00:39:37.200
He's going to hire Patrick David to kill you.
1.00
00:39:43.700
The fat pussy would be a fine way to go out.
1.00
00:39:48.240
And I think the ladder, I think the sex ladder that we had mentioned is a great way.
0.94
00:39:54.800
And like, I don't know if anybody played The Sims ever growing up, but you can die from
1.00
00:40:22.420
I really, I saw you bought your own mic to this fucking thing that was supposed to be
0.99
00:40:29.700
And number two, you know, I just spent two and a half hours talking about a guy sucking
1.00
00:40:36.820
And this is still the gayest thing I've done all day.
1.00
00:40:50.140
This is a question that we've asked a lot of times on Tower Gang.
00:40:52.980
And we just do it philosophically, like run through situational, you know, different situations
00:41:10.360
We'll do the Felcher first and then Obama.
0.67
00:41:21.900
I found out that this guy has literally never used his dick, which is...
1.00
00:41:27.780
Yeah, which is like something we need to talk about a lot.
00:41:32.540
And I still have the best of the three mailbags that I didn't get to yet, just so you know.
0.99
00:41:45.060
And I'm running for president of the United States of America.
0.99
00:41:48.200
I am not a politician, but let's face it, the world has never been helped by politicians.
00:41:55.140
We don't need any more politicians on the show.
00:42:01.900
We need candidate that represents the American population.
00:42:06.260
I came from nothing, and because of the American people...
0.98
00:42:08.200
And drinking Anheuser-Busch, that's gay, too.
0.82
00:42:17.200
Everything is present in this beautiful country, and I want to make sure your voices are heard.
00:42:20.980
That's why I believe you should vote for me to be president of the United States of America.
00:42:40.280
I just unloaded the biggest cream pie inside of baby Kate 666,
0.91
00:42:57.180
I think anybody running for president or considering it is gay.
0.99
00:43:00.380
I'm going to go not gay, because it's actually just cheaper than Plan B.
1.00
00:43:04.840
He's just like, she's not going to frame it if I suck all the come out.
0.99
00:43:07.740
And he made a point to say, I sucked it all out.
0.98
00:43:13.920
You've got to vacuum that shit all out, man.
0.99
00:43:17.440
He was like, she doesn't get pregnant as long as I get older.
1.00
00:43:21.460
He throws snakes downstairs, and he sucks out his fucking own cum.
1.00
00:43:30.500
I don't think it's gay, because one, if you eat your own cum,
1.00
00:43:37.260
You're the gayest person ever for even nine years.
1.00
00:43:42.260
Well, then having dudes come in your mouth is also cannibalism.
1.00
00:43:51.220
On this show, we've all admitted to tasting our own cum, right?
0.82
00:44:07.560
This has been stated, and it's been stated clearly,
00:44:18.160
No, I think this is like whenever you call it...
1.00
00:44:20.100
Is your face in your mouth, you fucking freak?
0.99
00:44:21.460
When you said Clint has ED, you did the same thing there,
1.00
00:44:35.440
I think me and Toe are the only ones who've admitted it, so...
00:44:39.500
but I don't think it would be a gay thing to taste my own cum.
0.98
00:44:45.600
and just like wasn't paying attention where my dick was pointed,
1.00
00:44:47.780
and fucking whoop, right in the fucking mouth.
1.00
00:45:01.180
but she just came in my mouth in high school.
1.00
00:45:02.940
So then you let your wife not have to swallow it then, right?
0.91
00:45:11.040
So if your wife spits out your cum after you blow it.
1.00
00:45:20.620
Well, so at what point does this become gay
0.89
00:45:31.400
That was the gayest thing I've ever seen in my fucking life.
1.00
00:45:45.000
but I think also the orifice that you suck it out of matters.
0.98
00:45:47.640
We also had a thing on the show where it's like,
1.00
00:45:50.400
if there's a vagina involved, it does negate the gay.
1.00
00:45:54.260
So there isn't very much a vagina involved in this.
1.00
00:45:57.640
You're telling me if Cole fucks Toad in the ass,
1.00
00:46:01.120
but he eats pussy while it's happening, it's not gay?
1.00
00:46:29.920
I think if you flip it and I'm fucking pussy,
1.00
00:46:37.880
The fact that you're trying to define the spectrum
0.58
00:51:25.380
Does Obama's dick also give good speeches?
1.00
00:51:47.500
this sounds like a really greedy lover scenario
01:15:51.520
there's no food or water coming in for another like week.
01:16:10.740
You're at the age of being able to rape and you're getting married.
0.99
01:16:18.200
you don't know anything about opportunity cause?
01:16:34.600
these grandkids aren't going to rape themselves.
1.00
01:16:50.800
if you have any semblance of rain while you're at Burning Man,
01:16:58.220
you're trying to just get high and have fun with your friends and then you end up eating each other.
01:17:03.900
cause like there was like stories about fucking,
0.99
01:17:10.920
I think that is about the average for Burning Man.
01:17:18.300
the things from fucking alien were coming out of the mud.
0.99
01:17:38.280
And then you got all these face huggers walking around.
01:17:42.160
I'm going to put one of those things on my dick,
1.00
01:17:54.500
Like we were going to like fly out that girl.
0.68
01:18:12.520
podcast called the confessionals with Tony Merkel.
01:18:15.200
And it was this thing about these guys that he,
01:18:19.520
devil worshiping cults and they went out to Joshua tree and he saw like some crazy shit happen.
0.98
01:18:27.760
then like one of my favorite guys puts out a thing about demons.
01:18:32.820
And then Top was talking about fucking demons and angels with his daughter.
0.99
01:18:39.600
a cult shit happening to me right now that I'm not liking where this is going.
0.95
01:18:46.320
somebody said something about like the only way you can get demons in you is you have to actually invite them in.
01:18:50.960
And I remember that you're possessed by a demon Cole.
01:18:58.200
I remember this is going to be another adventure in Cole's life,
01:19:08.440
when I was growing up after I learned to jerk off,
0.95
01:20:17.600
You're gay for letting your cousin tell you that.
1.00
01:20:20.720
did y'all just figure out jerking off on your own?
1.00
01:20:28.900
I told you guys I used to jerk off like this as opposed to like this because I didn't know
0.99
01:20:34.440
I think I started off with like humping pillows.
01:20:41.640
he always talks about this mattress thing.
1.00
01:20:53.760
you were like your fat being like touched.
1.00
01:20:55.780
Are you just bragging about your dick reaching your belly button again?
1.00
01:20:58.920
This is a roundabout way to brag about your dick.
1.00
01:21:00.800
I was actually inserting it to the belly button.
1.00
01:21:03.040
Obama's dick would definitely reach his belly button,
1.00
01:21:24.040
your body at five years old looks the exact same as it does right now.
01:21:35.540
You just took the hair that was on your head and you put it on your beard,
0.99
01:21:38.740
and that's the only thing that's changed in 35 years.
01:21:41.700
I was incredibly thin up until like sometime in high school probably.
0.99
01:21:53.160
He picked up a 30 and said it was a 40 when we could clearly see it,
01:22:19.200
The closest thing I would get to is like sports magazines in the back.
0.98
01:22:24.520
and sometimes they would have like a girl in lingerie on there.
1.00
01:22:36.940
this is going to be so fucking weird saying this.
0.99
01:22:42.360
can you put like a big titted girl in my mind,
1.00
01:22:52.940
Why did you have to ask a higher power to think of a big breasted woman at all?
0.90
01:23:25.860
why would you ask the devil for a big breasted woman?
1.00
01:24:05.860
you still have that fucking barrel gut thing happening as a four-year-old.
1.00
01:24:17.860
I weighed like 38 pounds when I was like seven or eight years old.
01:24:37.980
I like how you asked the barber for the Obama half-circumcised penis cut.
1.00
01:25:00.320
If your mom sends you out into fucking public school with that haircut,
1.00
01:25:16.760
Like we're going to use this as picture as proof.
01:25:46.700
I don't like the way that you're reminiscing about this is if you had peaked at six.
01:25:53.560
this is the greatest photo of me in my entire life.
01:26:00.620
Toad literally peaked in like elementary school.
01:26:04.520
He thinks he peaked with a bowl cut standing in front of a piano.
01:26:09.460
I'm going to go back to the good old days on the playground.
01:26:15.840
when I could actually read sentences at 16 months.
01:26:25.860
a lot of people told you you had a lot of potential.
01:26:28.340
he could read it 16 months and he didn't even weigh 16 pounds.
01:26:41.440
you should fire bomb that building wherever it happened.
0.99
01:26:53.980
Did you actually get the big titted woman?
1.00
01:27:00.340
He's telling you that he's telling you he tried to sell his soul and the devil was like,
01:27:10.140
you know how much shit I have to give you?
1.00
01:27:14.460
is that your uncle asked for a little boy's butthole and he gave him you.
1.00
01:27:21.400
So all I have is a sports illustrated in my cousin's saliva and I'm just going to town on myself.
01:27:40.360
This great nation was built by the Freemasons and the occult.
0.99
01:27:46.760
There's nothing more American than asking the devil to give you something fucking awesome and powerful.
0.98
01:27:50.940
I feel like that's probably like what most of the people selling their soul did it for is for sex or like some sort of,
0.99
01:28:00.540
You literally just want me to put titties in your mind?
1.00
01:28:20.580
unless you got a piece or really stupid flexible,
0.99
01:28:22.680
you're always like right here and you're like,
0.99
01:28:29.620
It doesn't feel like you're getting your dick sucked.
1.00
01:28:52.360
Tower gang needs to reach out to the Island boys and get some casting going.
1.00
01:29:00.880
but like the Island boys are slowly getting gay.
1.00
01:29:16.140
they have an only fans and they slowly are getting closer.
01:29:35.760
There's also a video of them blowing each other.
01:29:44.420
I'm one of the ones telling them to do more.
0.99
01:29:49.080
I'm the only one paying for them to do this.
0.95
01:30:01.960
If you're fucking a guy who looks like exactly like you,
1.00
01:30:10.580
anytime you say a sentence that starts with,
0.99
01:30:18.100
So I was a counselor at an afterschool program and we had a set of twins and they were,
01:30:28.620
they would go to the bathroom and they would do gay shit with each other.
1.00
01:30:51.060
like kids are doing gay shit with each other.
1.00
01:31:06.300
they would literally be celebrities and I'm not even,
01:31:13.840
but it's oddly more narcissistic than it is gay.
1.00
01:31:20.800
if there was some reason you could clone yourself,
01:31:42.420
he would kill himself to actually murder himself.
1.00
01:31:44.980
That would actually be a great way to kill Toad.
1.00
01:31:48.280
it's the worst thing she can do if she wants to be in a relationship with me.
0.97
01:32:03.480
What about if you had two twin sisters fucking themselves?
1.00
01:32:29.560
I'd make him my slave if he was in the South.
1.00
01:32:39.400
we started with white people and then we're like,
01:32:40.800
these guys don't work as hard as these other dudes.
01:32:43.840
the whole thing with like the Irish slave or whatever,
01:32:55.500
So they forced mating with the native population,
01:33:08.540
Jamaica first and all the Caribbean's in the South.
0.97
01:33:21.720
either they died off or they progressively became lighter skin.
01:33:35.060
You're saying Bob Marley was probably like a third Irish or something.
01:33:42.520
this is so you're not allowed to say any of this,
01:33:50.960
it's an incredible book that gets you down the,
01:34:30.880
You think immediately it has to do with their race and not the fact that
01:34:38.060
They're low IQ comes half from the black half and the other half from the
1.00
01:34:45.480
That's why they're particularly fucked up.
0.99
01:34:58.200
So it was like the worst traits of each race that mixed came out instead of
1.00
01:35:04.300
So it was just like the worst part of being Irish and the worst part of being
1.00
01:35:10.600
is there any nationality or like variant of black that you hate more than
1.00
01:35:32.700
are you talking about the Haitians are rough?
0.94
01:36:06.640
What do you think about interracial interracial sex?
0.84
01:36:11.520
I looked at him and I saw that he wanted me to like argue with him.
01:36:15.000
I think it's disgusting and it should never happen.
1.00
01:36:19.880
He was livid because he wanted to make the point that it was disgusting for a white woman to be or whatever this.
1.00
01:36:37.640
this is all you have to do to like get under the skin is just like agree with them.
01:36:45.160
did you think it was hard to get under their skin?
01:36:48.700
I just stand up on a box and yell at people when they're off time.
01:36:57.860
I don't know what's worse because I don't know if you've ever,
01:37:25.240
They get their kids and everybody to stand on the street corners,
01:37:31.620
like you're going to hell and that shit like that.
1.00
01:37:34.120
So I don't know if they're worse or the black Hebrew Israelites are worse.
1.00
01:37:51.000
funerals for like gay people and stuff like that.
01:38:06.980
like I understood like just seeing people on the street corner,
01:38:09.500
but it's like street preachers and they're just like,
01:38:19.240
she had a church in Coney Island and she was doing that.
01:38:37.660
probably should have listened to her and stop that way back then.
0.90
01:38:42.740
he was against gay marriage the whole time he was in office.
01:38:50.040
because probably because Larry Sinclair came out in 2008,
01:39:04.340
That would be the greatest like flip ever is he goes from like a gay marriage should be legal to I am a faggot.
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01:39:18.680
And I've been married to a dude this entire time.
0.99
01:39:29.880
I just looked it up over 30,000 views of my interview with Luke already.
01:39:36.840
That's actually a good spot to start doing some.
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01:39:45.840
So forget about the fucking we are change video with Larry Sinclair over on YouTube because we had to play it super safe.
0.94
01:39:54.580
Go straight to rumble right now and look up the we are change all one word.
01:39:59.620
It's the Larry Sinclair interview and we go fucking hard in the paint.
0.98
01:40:05.940
when he described Barack Obama as a pencil dick,
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01:40:11.540
this is the greatest fucking moment of my podcasting life.
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01:40:15.680
I've had on Tom Luongo and Max Blumenthal and Dave Smith on Liberty Lockdown over the past week.
01:40:21.340
So subscribe there and follow me on Twitter at Liberty Lock pod.
01:40:34.920
Slick and Thick on gas digital.com every Monday and Saturday,
01:40:50.380
Did you hear that we got banned from gas digital?
01:40:53.860
I'm actually kind of shocked that you guys are right up gas digital's alley.
01:41:13.340
So you're in Florida and that's the whole reason that they told us that they didn't want
01:41:17.140
to bring us on is that we're not in New York city.
01:41:21.040
maybe because we've been a pain in the ass for them to produce.
0.99
01:41:35.700
we also have an idea of why is that Lewis just really likes MMA.
01:41:43.240
it just gets me into the MMA side of like podcasting and like touch this.
01:41:58.160
who apparently has a huge resume that we didn't even know about.
01:43:16.340
I'm going to be in a Kansas city performing on Friday.
01:43:31.200
We're going over the most canceled people and canceled videos called canceled weekly.
01:43:58.200
I actually just did another recent episode where I interviewed my five-year-old daughter
01:44:01.820
and I was talking to her about the Nephilim and the fallen angels and the Garden of Eden.
0.99
01:44:06.820
And it was very interesting to sit there with a little child and completely blow their fucking mind about insane stuff.
0.98
01:44:14.900
Pick a conspiracy and just talk to my daughter about it and see what she said.
0.99
01:44:18.820
I love that you're just going to turn your five-year-old into a lunatic.
0.98
01:44:22.980
I'm not going to tell her like the earth is flat.
01:44:27.900
this week we're talking about Epstein's Island.
01:44:35.500
his daughter's only seven years younger than Mary when she got pregnant by,
0.52
01:45:22.080
that I feel like that's what you ought to be doing.
01:46:57.880
thank you for fucking taking the time out.
0.99
01:47:10.960
I could just beat the fucking shit out of him.
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01:48:24.080
It's so fucking hard to line up the syllables and all.
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