Tower Gang - Ep 201 - Jay Diarrhea

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00:00:12.340 Hashtag make a play.

00:00:15.460 This shit is retarded.

00:00:16.220 This shit is retarded.

00:00:17.180 It's Power Gang Wednesday, motherfuckers.

00:00:20.340 Retarded.

00:00:20.860 What's up, retards?

00:00:24.880 I want to listen to music from the hood.

00:00:26.940 I don't ever want to step foot in it.

00:00:28.640 Right.

00:00:30.000 I've been reprying for another one, and in the background of mine, I was like, it would

00:00:35.060 be me that it's a retarded baby.

00:00:36.820 But it would be so cool.

00:00:37.860 And I'm like, hold you and your down.

00:00:43.300 What are you doing with your mom?

00:00:46.360 He just had his dick in her.

00:00:51.300 Why are we talking about on this show?

00:00:56.260 Oh, that's too far.

00:00:58.040 I'm asking you a question.

00:01:01.660 I'm asking you a question.

00:01:04.860 Skip the pussy.

00:01:06.280 Skip it.

00:01:07.020 It's not what this show is about.

00:01:08.620 This shit is retarded.

00:01:09.460 This shit is fuck, man.

00:01:16.280 Welcome back to Tower Gang.

00:01:17.660 It is another episode after Bohemian Grove.

00:01:20.060 Clinton is not here.

00:01:21.180 He is getting pussy.

00:01:22.580 Or probably he fell and broke his hip getting out of the shower or something like that.

00:01:25.940 He's old as shit.

00:01:27.520 He's old as shit.

00:01:28.540 But we got Top.

00:01:30.640 We got fucking Jose.

00:01:31.980 We got Toad.

00:01:33.240 We got me.

00:01:34.400 I'm Cole.

00:01:35.380 Yeah, yeah.

00:01:35.720 There you go.

00:01:36.080 Put them all up on the screen.

00:01:37.840 We're fucking working through technical difficulties.

00:01:40.040 Oh, God.

00:01:40.920 You got to be fucking kidding me.

00:01:41.880 Are you good?

00:01:42.440 Top.

00:01:43.920 Really?

00:01:44.440 From the jump.

00:01:45.120 By the way, we're going through audio minefields with Top right now.

00:01:48.660 We're here.

00:01:49.180 I'm here.

00:01:49.540 We're good.

00:01:50.500 Were you talking with us?

00:01:51.380 Is that what that was?

00:01:52.360 No, no, no.

00:01:55.100 This is a disaster.

00:01:58.760 Yeah, sorry we were so late, guys.

00:02:00.660 Top.

00:02:01.140 There were gremlins in his machines.

00:02:03.640 I had that yesterday for my show.

00:02:05.420 They're saying they can't hear me.

00:02:06.760 This is seeing what I mean.

00:02:07.540 They can 100% hear you.

00:02:08.720 They're fucking with you.

00:02:09.060 Yeah, they're fucking with you.

00:02:10.020 They're fucking with you.

00:02:10.900 I think they're fucking with you.

00:02:11.480 I don't know.

00:02:12.200 We all.

00:02:12.660 Why is Top so quiet?

00:02:13.480 All these people were in the free show.

00:02:15.320 Why is Top so quiet?

00:02:15.680 They were all in the fucking pre-show.

00:02:17.720 Dude, Raven does this to me sometimes.

00:02:20.440 He'll send his chat after me.

00:02:21.880 I don't know if he tells them to do this, but they will do that shit.

00:02:25.000 And I'll be like, wait, what?

00:02:26.920 This is worse than when I fucking did the beep to you guys.

00:02:31.560 Is this loud to you?

00:02:33.720 You remember that episode?

00:02:35.080 Oh, that one is loud.

00:02:36.600 That's loud, right?

00:02:37.640 What the fuck?

00:02:39.060 It's so loud.

00:02:40.320 At least I know I'm not black.

00:02:41.860 You can look like a boss level nigga to deal with that.

00:02:43.800 Even the blacks could hear that shirt, by the way.

00:02:47.300 They could.

00:02:48.020 They don't hear the other ones.

00:02:49.440 I think they're not joking.

00:02:52.940 I think they can't hear me.

00:02:53.980 No.

00:02:54.820 No.

00:02:55.600 They're fucking with you.

00:02:56.380 That's bullshit.

00:02:57.640 Yeah.

00:02:58.720 Hey, well, we have a producer for this.

00:03:00.660 Can you check that out?

00:03:02.000 Verify.

00:03:02.640 Yeah, these fuckers.

00:03:03.560 Way to go, guys.

00:03:04.440 Your prank's paying off.

00:03:05.560 We're wasting time for it now.

00:03:06.880 We're sending a producer to check it out.

00:03:08.380 Well, this is good because we didn't have content anyway, so I guess we'll just continue the

00:03:13.900 audio check all throughout the show.

00:03:15.800 We'll just rip off logistics.

00:03:16.880 This is episode 201, man.

00:03:18.380 What do you check?

00:03:20.440 All good.

00:03:20.800 These fuckers.

00:03:22.160 Okay, it's all good.

00:03:24.300 All right.

00:03:25.020 There you go.

00:03:25.480 Fuck you guys.

00:03:26.220 Top is starting Spanish for me right now.

00:03:29.880 Dude, it's funny about this.

00:03:31.420 So on the way home from-

00:03:32.620 Tom takes one bong rip and irreparably fucks his mic.

00:03:35.700 Hey, Marshall, should we officially congrats?

00:03:38.360 Oh, yeah.

00:03:38.760 That's Marshall Banana.

00:03:39.780 Hell yeah, Marshall.

00:03:41.240 Sweet dick, dude.

00:03:42.280 Dude.

00:03:42.600 Oh, my God.

00:03:43.900 Probably the fuck.

00:03:45.160 Okay, if anybody missed-

00:03:46.320 Great dick.

00:03:47.480 Dude, no.

00:03:48.580 Good dick.

00:03:49.180 We're drawing it, right?

00:03:50.380 And you're doing merch and everything just like with Raven.

00:03:53.160 Why do we keep doing it?

00:03:54.100 No, shut the fuck up.

00:03:55.100 We need to come up with a slogan.

00:03:56.440 He even had to become the war and everything.

00:03:57.700 I'm sorry, but with the props, you had to be-

00:04:01.020 Okay, I have to say this.

00:04:02.560 Like a whole marketing campaign for your cock?

00:04:05.420 The funniest moment of Bohemian Grove.

00:04:08.220 Yeah.

00:04:08.600 Funnier than Mark Random's set, which was really funny on the first night.

00:04:11.660 Not the second night.

00:04:12.480 Sorry, Mark.

00:04:12.880 I didn't even watch the second night, but I heard it's night.

00:04:14.340 Yeah, because it was the same in the second night, and everybody had heard the jokes.

00:04:16.020 He was insane both nights.

00:04:17.980 Funnier-

00:04:18.620 No, he was insane.

00:04:20.040 You guys just chose not to see it.

00:04:21.880 Or at least one of you did.

00:04:23.220 I didn't see it the second night.

00:04:24.200 I was outside smoking weed and drinking.

00:04:26.960 But funnier than-

00:04:27.960 Draw the dick.

00:04:28.320 Even though Leonardo's set was hilarious, and she made fun of the top.

00:04:31.320 The funniest moment of the entire weekend was whenever we pulled up Marshall Banana's

00:04:37.520 dick picture.

00:04:39.300 It was the loudest pop.

00:04:42.000 I mean, everybody fucking died laughing.

00:04:44.140 Dude, Dick always does it, dude.

00:04:45.180 They loved your dick, dude.

00:04:46.680 That audience will love that dick.

00:04:48.620 Loved that dick.

00:04:49.520 Dude, it was so fucking funny.

00:04:51.080 It was the best dick.

00:04:52.620 Congrats, Marshall.

00:04:53.400 You won a podcast with Toad.

00:04:54.020 Everyone applauded.

00:04:54.840 Everyone laughed.

00:04:56.200 You won a podcast with Toad.

00:04:57.440 People think I lied.

00:04:58.380 Good old fashioned there.

00:04:59.560 When I talked about his dick, I hyped it up big time.

00:05:01.880 And then it turned out I was lying, at least to all of you.

00:05:04.660 Yeah, I did like that.

00:05:06.020 This time, you thought I was lying again.

00:05:06.520 And then we reveal it.

00:05:07.660 You're like, what is this guy talking about?

00:05:08.440 I thought you were-

00:05:09.060 No, we thought you were talking in metaphors.

00:05:11.200 We thought you were just like-

00:05:12.380 It was cool for me, having already seen the cock, and then watching that podcast,

00:05:15.840 and then figuring out, like, they don't get it.

00:05:18.660 They don't get what a glorious cock this is.

00:05:20.500 And so, it made it even better.

00:05:21.400 I'm like, they're going to really love this.

00:05:23.460 Like, I knew.

00:05:23.880 And then they did.

00:05:24.460 And I was like, all right.

00:05:25.640 I'll be honest.

00:05:26.320 I was just having fun watching you have a stroke up there.

00:05:29.160 Like, it was like, it was the weirdest weekend watching Toad be Toad.

00:05:33.440 He was operating under such an immense amount of stress that it almost didn't, like, come through.

00:05:39.580 Did you guys notice that?

00:05:40.920 I didn't even know.

00:05:41.740 I was so drunk.

00:05:42.380 I wasn't there.

00:05:42.840 I drank-

00:05:44.400 So, I was hoping y'all would ask me about it, because I brought up-

00:05:47.320 So, I had banana pudding moonshine.

00:05:48.140 No, we don't care.

00:05:49.560 Well, I'm just saying, like-

00:05:50.720 That was my banana pudding moonshine.

00:05:53.360 I drank all of it.

00:05:54.240 Banana pudding moonshine?

00:05:55.240 Yes, dude.

00:05:55.820 It was so good.

00:05:57.420 It tasted just-

00:05:58.160 All right.

00:05:59.300 So, someone gave Top banana pudding moonshine on Friday night.

00:06:02.480 It was our banana pudding moonshine.

00:06:05.560 My house.

00:06:06.460 It was my house.

00:06:07.520 And so, we went back to the house.

00:06:08.660 It belongs to the collective, okay?

00:06:09.980 We went back to my house, and someone had given-

00:06:12.820 My podcast husband, some banana pudding moonshine, and butter pecan moonshine.

00:06:18.340 And the banana pudding moonshine tasted just like the little Jell-O, like, banana pudding

00:06:23.600 packs.

00:06:24.400 No, this isn't-

00:06:25.100 This wasn't from a store.

00:06:26.140 This was from a fan.

00:06:27.100 Well, not a fan.

00:06:28.040 I can't say who did it.

00:06:29.180 Well, that's why I didn't want to say it was-

00:06:30.460 Very secretive about this.

00:06:31.780 It's a family recipe.

00:06:33.120 Yeah, it was in a-

00:06:34.740 It was in a mason jar.

00:06:36.300 Like, it was like-

00:06:36.740 That is the shit.

00:06:38.420 I miss that stuff.

00:06:39.760 Cole went to an entire banana pudding festival, and they didn't have any shit like that.

00:06:42.520 They didn't have any moonshine there.

00:06:43.620 Well, then he gave it to us.

00:06:44.560 That's not where they sell moonshine.

00:06:45.860 Like, you got to know somebody in the fucking hall.

00:06:47.880 This guy gave it to us, and then-

00:06:51.020 Hey, what's up, Clint?

00:06:52.020 Whatever.

00:06:52.540 You're late.

00:06:53.060 Clint, shut up for a second.

00:06:54.980 Is your hip okay?

00:06:55.600 My hip?

00:06:56.320 Yeah.

00:06:56.760 I heard you fell and heard it.

00:06:58.280 I broke it.

00:06:58.720 Broke it.

00:06:59.140 Take it.

00:06:59.220 Yeah, I heard you.

00:07:00.160 I was falling on the-

00:07:00.620 Yeah.

00:07:01.300 Well, we're glad you're here.

00:07:02.240 This guy gives us the moonshine from the trunk of his car, and he goes, like, in a southern accent,

00:07:07.220 he goes real quiet.

00:07:07.980 He's like, don't tell nobody that I'll make this, because it's a family recipe, and we

00:07:12.440 can get in a lot of trouble for it.

00:07:14.360 And I was like, what the fuck did you just give me?

00:07:16.280 I mean, the owner of the club was giving me weed, and then this guy gave me moonshine.

00:07:20.100 I felt like he gave me a bomb.

00:07:21.560 But it was good?

00:07:22.840 It was-

00:07:23.280 Oh, my God.

00:07:23.860 It was so-

00:07:24.300 It was delicious.

00:07:24.960 Like, I drank-

00:07:25.920 And so, that night, I had-

00:07:28.040 Fucking shout out Brad Lyle of The Awakened Podcast.

00:07:30.580 Go check out his podcast, man.

00:07:31.840 The guy's awesome.

00:07:32.700 I fucking was just-

00:07:34.080 I was downing it.

00:07:35.220 And then the only other person drinking it was David's wife was drinking it, too.

00:07:39.160 But that night, I came with a full mason jar, and by the end, there was none left.

00:07:43.480 And I was hoping someone would ask, because it was, like, milky.

00:07:46.320 It was, like, creamy, dude.

00:07:47.460 It was crazy.

00:07:48.300 You drank all of it?

00:07:49.420 I wanted to try some.

00:07:50.660 Oh, my God.

00:07:51.020 I drank all of it.

00:07:52.180 Come on.

00:07:52.700 Can you imagine you getting shitty on that and throwing up later?

00:07:56.180 Cole, why were you so aggro after the event?

00:08:00.680 What do you mean, aggro?

00:08:01.340 Because he was drunk on moonshine, dog.

00:08:03.420 You're not listening to that.

00:08:04.440 He was a fucking white lightning, dude.

00:08:06.440 Dude, you might make Cole a worse house guest.

00:08:08.500 Was I aggro?

00:08:09.960 Yeah, you were very aggro.

00:08:11.420 Yeah, you were like, fuck you, and shit like that.

00:08:14.060 He became one with the liquor.

00:08:16.040 No, it's weird, because-

00:08:17.560 Would you rather have Mark Random there being schizo, or Cole drinking all of your moonshine?

00:08:21.660 I don't know.

00:08:21.880 Dude, it was a cold all day.

00:08:22.780 The answer is always Cole, but I thought it was just a very interesting dynamic, because

00:08:28.440 Cole was as aggro as I thought.

00:08:31.460 This guy was so mad about his weed.

00:08:33.300 He came up to me.

00:08:34.380 He was like, bro, the weed he gave me was probably CBD.

00:08:37.420 It wasn't even that good.

00:08:38.120 I was like, what the fuck do you-

00:08:38.660 He probably went and got, like, the THCA or Delta 8 or some shit from the store.

00:08:42.500 I was like, look what I got, guys.

00:08:44.300 It's hilarious.

00:08:45.460 It's hilarious.

00:08:46.260 Cole was as aggro.

00:08:47.220 No, Alex is the owner of the place there.

00:08:50.960 So, Cole, we get back after the event.

00:08:53.280 Cole's as aggro as I've ever seen him.

00:08:54.900 Like, he's fucking high out of his mind off of moonshine.

00:08:57.600 And Toad is having what appears to be an out-of-body panic attack.

00:09:02.260 Yes.

00:09:02.720 Yeah, it was.

00:09:03.820 It really was.

00:09:04.680 The entire weekend.

00:09:06.720 I had two in the morning.

00:09:07.780 It's like one.

00:09:08.540 He was genuinely losing his shit, was he not?

00:09:11.760 It was beautiful.

00:09:12.480 That's what I was saying.

00:09:13.000 It was a beautiful thing to watch.

00:09:14.040 Every time I got to, like, peek over from whatever busyness I was doing-

00:09:16.600 What was he stressed about?

00:09:18.160 I was like, I'm plugging-

00:09:19.100 Oh, he didn't watch it.

00:09:19.740 He doesn't watch the show.

00:09:20.640 I was plugging in shit, doing all this kind of stuff.

00:09:23.420 And every time I'd look over and I'd look at Toad, I'm like, he's having a way worse time than me.

00:09:27.220 So, I'm like, it's all good.

00:09:28.400 It's all gravy, man.

00:09:29.400 It was about getting a ride.

00:09:30.840 Like, that's what I'm-

00:09:31.360 I'm stressed about that to such a degree.

00:09:33.300 Jose, to such a degree, shut up.

00:09:35.640 Jose, you don't know what happened?

00:09:37.080 No, no.

00:09:37.560 Jose, watch it.

00:09:38.260 I watched-

00:09:39.020 All I watched was Tower Gang.

00:09:40.660 I haven't watched any of the other stuff you guys did.

00:09:43.020 You knew the whole Mark Random thing about how Mark had the car.

00:09:45.780 Yes, I caught that.

00:09:46.840 It was the same.

00:09:47.640 After the show-

00:09:49.060 And we have news later, too, that's happened since then.

00:09:51.560 Yeah, yeah, yeah.

00:09:51.600 We do not say that.

00:09:53.180 After the show, Mark Random takes Toad's car.

00:09:56.460 Why?

00:09:56.980 I have no idea.

00:09:58.960 Toad has to be up at 6 a.m. to go to the airport.

00:10:02.160 No, no, no.

00:10:02.660 Even better.

00:10:03.740 No, no, no, no.

00:10:04.200 Before 6 a.m.

00:10:04.760 Wait, Mark told me-

00:10:06.020 At 4.30.

00:10:07.220 Hold on, Mark told me-

00:10:08.320 Wait, wait, wait, wait, wait.

00:10:09.240 Mark texted me and he said, yeah, I totally told Toad that I'd bring him to the airport.

00:10:15.020 Just take an Uber to me and I'll drive you to the airport.

00:10:19.240 He has your car.

00:10:21.340 He was in Ocala, like, I don't know, 40 minutes north of where I don't fucking-

00:10:25.460 Take an Uber to you?

00:10:28.440 It's wild.

00:10:28.900 But there was also the thing of, we did tell Toad, we said, Toad, on Saturday night, you

00:10:34.480 tell Random, this is my car, I'm taking it back in the morning.

00:10:38.540 You go be a big boy.

00:10:40.460 You tell him, you stand up for yourself.

00:10:42.820 I was not forceful enough.

00:10:45.180 Well, to be fair, it was our car.

00:10:47.480 It was a communal car.

00:10:48.720 I'm sorry, Tyler.

00:10:49.580 That's what Mark told you.

00:10:50.600 Can you hear me?

00:10:51.500 Tyler, can the people hear me?

00:10:52.900 Can you guys hear me?

00:10:53.460 Please check again.

00:10:54.140 It's 100% I can hear you.

00:10:54.580 Because I just feel, these guys are driving me even more schizo than I already am.

00:10:58.560 All right.

00:10:58.680 That's it.

00:10:58.980 But, and so, so we get back for, so we all go out to eat at Miller's Aero House.

00:11:03.200 There was one bad thing with a waiter, Josie and Clint deuces.

00:11:08.240 They're gone and Top and his, Top and David, all of them were like, fuck this, we're out.

00:11:12.680 And so it was like, I stayed with Royce.

00:11:14.480 It was Royce with us.

00:11:15.240 No, okay.

00:11:15.580 Here's what happened.

00:11:16.220 They're like, yo, I said, I said, we're going to meet at my house, right?

00:11:19.040 And we're all keeping it like on the low.

00:11:21.340 No offense.

00:11:21.800 Mark will probably watch.

00:11:22.540 We're never like, don't tell Mark.

00:11:23.800 Whatever.

00:11:24.260 So, no, we were, we were sleeping.

00:11:26.700 So then Royce, he's like, I want to eat.

00:11:29.020 And he's like, like, he's convinced now everybody that's going to come chill to my house that

00:11:32.600 you guys are going to go eat.

00:11:33.800 So I'm like, cool.

00:11:34.780 I have things to take care of.

00:11:35.940 I get to the restaurant late.

00:11:37.580 I get there.

00:11:38.560 All the tables are full and they go, oh, bro, just have a seat.

00:11:41.640 I'm like, where?

00:11:42.260 And they're like, oh, sit over there at the bar.

00:11:43.940 So I was like, so wait, I'm going to come out to eat and discuss the event that I just

00:11:47.380 did at the table by myself.

00:11:49.020 I was like, I'll just fucking go home.

00:11:50.080 What am I doing here?

00:11:51.080 And I left.

00:11:51.700 The kid's table.

00:11:53.000 You'd get to sit with Mersh, though.

00:11:54.500 He was over there.

00:11:55.480 Well, Mersh got there after.

00:11:56.940 He wasn't happy about it.

00:11:58.980 But, but then like a waiter, like said, like, so they were really pissed off at us.

00:12:03.000 So like, I tell you, once we got our thing made, it like it was eight and then we're

00:12:06.740 like deuces.

00:12:07.360 We're going back.

00:12:07.940 But like, so we get back to the house.

00:12:10.380 Wait, who was mad at you?

00:12:10.860 He was riding with us.

00:12:11.980 What?

00:12:12.480 Who was mad at you?

00:12:13.760 The waiter.

00:12:14.660 The waiter.

00:12:14.900 The waiter was like big mad at us because we had like 17 people.

00:12:18.060 He was pissed.

00:12:18.360 Yeah.

00:12:18.540 He was like big mad.

00:12:19.580 He was like, whatever.

00:12:21.180 He came up and he asked if we wanted to order.

00:12:24.480 And someone was like, like, there were a lot of people, different parties and shit.

00:12:28.580 Like, we don't know who's going to order first, who wants to order.

00:12:31.240 And the guy just goes like, who wants to order?

00:12:33.220 Is anybody, are you guys ready to order?

00:12:34.820 And then like, we're just kind of like a little bit frantic.

00:12:36.620 And then he just goes, ah!

00:12:37.800 And he just like walks away.

00:12:39.300 He was aggro.

00:12:39.920 Can you read that, Clint?

00:12:42.020 No puedo escuchar el lobster.

00:12:44.240 Okay.

00:12:44.920 Can't hear.

00:12:46.340 They're lying.

00:12:46.720 I don't know.

00:12:47.120 Well, you can hear you fine, dude.

00:12:48.220 They're just struggling with you.

00:12:49.200 But, um.

00:12:50.220 How high are you, Toad?

00:12:50.700 So we get back.

00:12:51.400 So we get back.

00:12:52.120 And so this is where, when Toad decides that he needs to find a ride to the airport in

00:12:58.400 the morning at 4.30.

00:12:59.440 Well, I already knew that I was, but I was pacing around.

00:13:00.080 No, no, no.

00:13:00.440 But this is when you decided to figure it out.

00:13:02.300 This is when you decided to figure it out.

00:13:03.780 And don't.

00:13:03.880 Josie had to become my mother in that moment.

00:13:05.340 She straight up did.

00:13:06.100 She goes, Toad, you can get an Uber.

00:13:08.320 So you can sit on my lap for a second.

00:13:09.900 And then, literally, she goes, Hey, Toad, you can get an Uber for like 90 bucks to

00:13:14.640 the airport at 4.30 in the morning.

00:13:16.800 But for some reason, he couldn't get an Uber from the airport in the middle of the day

00:13:21.460 for like, I just thought that it was going to be faster.

00:13:26.780 And I didn't want to be alone.

00:13:28.420 It could be faster.

00:13:29.500 And I wound up in a situation where I rented a car with Mark Randall.

00:13:33.520 I don't understand.

00:13:34.520 Like, this guy is supposed to be so smart.

00:13:36.320 And then, like, he's like, I don't think, I think.

00:13:38.460 Bimboozled by a fucking, I don't know.

00:13:41.440 It would be faster and cheaper just to take an Uber.

00:13:44.000 And so instead, instead of getting an Uber, he co-rents a car, pays for the entirety of

00:13:49.900 it with a actual schizophrenic who's off of his medications, who then takes the vehicle.

00:13:55.280 You can't even say co-rent.

00:13:56.600 He paid for it, took all liability, signed all the papers.

00:13:59.740 He says he didn't sign the papers.

00:14:01.740 He said Mark Randall signed all the papers.

00:14:03.980 He just provided the credit card and said he was a co-driver.

00:14:07.020 Right.

00:14:07.280 But because I paid, yeah, they had to make me a co-driver.

00:14:09.560 You're legally liability.

00:14:10.620 If it's on your credit card, you're effed, bro.

00:14:12.160 Did he return, I think this is a good question.

00:14:13.800 Did he return it?

00:14:14.640 Because he should have returned it yesterday.

00:14:16.240 He fucking got in a wreck.

00:14:18.240 Oh, yeah, yeah.

00:14:18.720 This is the thing.

00:14:20.080 What?

00:14:21.240 You missed this?

00:14:22.520 You missed it?

00:14:22.880 I missed this.

00:14:24.180 Yeah, he got a wreck.

00:14:25.760 Why are you laughing, Toad?

00:14:27.680 You stupid fuck.

00:14:29.080 He said he got sideswiped.

00:14:30.560 He said he got sideswiped.

00:14:31.620 Yeah, he sent a photo of it.

00:14:32.920 And he's just kind of like, ha, ha, ha.

00:14:34.660 My bad.

00:14:35.780 The tire was blown.

00:14:37.260 The tire was blown out, dude.

00:14:38.280 Oh, dude, like the front passenger side tire and fangirl, like completely gone.

00:14:42.740 Tyler, can you go find that picture and put it up here?

00:14:45.180 He sends me a picture of this.

00:14:47.000 It's so fucking funny.

00:14:48.440 He sends me this schizoran.

00:14:49.980 He's like, dude, this guy clipped me probably Monday, right?

00:14:54.420 Oh, yeah.

00:14:54.720 Here we go.

00:14:55.160 Here we go.

00:14:55.920 Get the fuck out of here.

00:14:57.420 So, this is what happened.

00:15:03.420 Look at the tire.

00:15:05.020 Clint, look at the tire.

00:15:09.060 So, this is what happened.

00:15:10.520 So, Random was going to drive.

00:15:11.300 Yo, dude, he went off-roading.

00:15:13.280 Nobody hit him.

00:15:14.260 Just the tire is off.

00:15:16.060 Dude, I don't even know what the fuck that is there.

00:15:18.340 But he, dude.

00:15:19.720 You gave him a car.

00:15:20.680 He was going to drive it three hours north to Jacksonville.

00:15:25.880 What's going on?

00:15:26.720 Like, the hub is completely missing.

00:15:29.260 Dude, I don't know.

00:15:29.860 So, he was going to drive to Jacksonville.

00:15:32.720 And then this is what happened.

00:15:33.760 The car rental place in Jacksonville closed, like, two months ago.

00:15:38.960 Yeah, which is nonsense.

00:15:40.560 Which is nonsense.

00:15:42.180 Yeah, I know.

00:15:43.080 So, he had to drive back to Orlando to drop the car off.

00:15:46.160 And in that process.

00:15:47.520 What does it say?

00:15:48.300 Go down.

00:15:48.740 I didn't finish reading the text.

00:15:51.240 Yeah.

00:15:52.860 He says, but I was almost to Orlando.

00:15:54.420 Dude clipped me.

00:15:55.880 I'm guessing he meant, say, he changed it.

00:15:58.860 Or S.

00:15:59.320 I can't.

00:15:59.940 Either he changed it, which means he.

00:16:01.580 Then he went to death to pay for it.

00:16:03.180 And I got it there under the 5 p.m. time.

00:16:05.300 Because as fucked up as I am and my life is, I secure my promises to people.

00:16:09.520 I'm not sure if we should be sharing this, by the way.

00:16:11.940 Oh, no.

00:16:12.560 This is hilarious.

00:16:13.560 This is silver lining.

00:16:14.580 The thing I think is funny.

00:16:17.580 So, I almost made it to Orlando.

00:16:18.620 Dude clipped me.

00:16:19.720 He changed it.

00:16:20.920 So, I like to think that he was like, hey, you blew my – and I don't know if Random doesn't know how to change a tire.

00:16:26.340 Or, like, you were just like, you changed the tire, which is so fucking funny.

00:16:30.540 According to Random, the dude's insurance paid for it, and he was able to, like, clear this with the bar at the place in time.

00:16:38.040 I would not bet on that.

00:16:39.260 I guarantee you what – and it's going to – it just feels like you're being hustled, and then you're going to get a bill and be like, what?

00:16:44.100 I totally cleared that up with Clarissa at the counter.

00:16:46.900 Like, it's going to be just this for infinite.

00:16:49.260 I'm watching my account like a Jew right now.

00:16:51.000 It hasn't happened yet.

00:16:53.280 I almost – I would almost put money on it.

00:16:55.220 You're the only person here.

00:16:56.520 I would almost put money on it that you're going to get some sort of bill, and then he's going to play it off as like, I totally – I talked to them.

00:17:03.680 I'll clear this up.

00:17:04.620 Don't you worry.

00:17:05.540 And it'll be something like that.

00:17:07.080 Yeah.

00:17:07.740 Why did you do that, Toad?

00:17:09.440 I feel responsible.

00:17:10.840 Clint is, like, legitimately, like, I think, upset.

00:17:14.920 I am.

00:17:15.480 It's insane.

00:17:15.940 It bothers me.

00:17:16.780 It's so reckless.

00:17:18.140 I mean, it bothers me on so many levels.

00:17:19.920 And then his reaction after the fact to have, like, this full out-of-body panic attack.

00:17:24.260 Well, we're all, like, on cloud nine because we're done with the event.

00:17:26.620 We had a great time.

00:17:27.520 And he's just fucking – he's pacing around just, like, trembling and shit.

00:17:31.040 Oh, we did –

00:17:31.840 My decisions have got up to me.

00:17:33.700 Hey, Top.

00:17:34.340 Top, tell the story you told us about the first night with the steps.

00:17:39.860 With the steps?

00:17:40.620 Oh, yeah, yeah, the steps.

00:17:41.980 I was finishing my steps.

00:17:43.280 No, shut up, Toad.

00:17:44.380 I want to hear Top say he was so fucking funny.

00:17:45.600 First off, before that, dude, it was very funny.

00:17:50.500 We were talking about you, Jose.

00:17:51.880 And we were saying, like, oh, Jose's wife stroked out so he can't come.

00:17:56.280 And Mark has a nerve to look at me and say, oh, sounds like you have some room in your house now.

00:18:00.480 I was like, you better fucking look for a motel or something.

00:18:02.720 Because he did exactly what Toad –

00:18:05.560 I bet you Jose was going to sleep somewhere.

00:18:07.220 And now he's not here, so.

00:18:08.880 Oh, that is the spare.

00:18:10.220 That is the spare.

00:18:11.600 So what happened to the –

00:18:12.540 Why is the spare all fucked up?

00:18:14.800 Wait.

00:18:15.600 Is that the spare?

00:18:16.480 No, that's not the spare.

00:18:17.600 No, it's just the hub cap came off.

00:18:19.260 The hub.

00:18:19.600 The hub.

00:18:19.900 Dude, he drove this thing into the fucking ground.

00:18:23.400 Yeah.

00:18:24.600 All right, so let me say, so that happens, right?

00:18:27.760 And it's like, first off, Toad, you bring this guy to my house.

00:18:30.840 It's incredible.

00:18:31.440 I brought him here to perform.

00:18:33.140 Yeah.

00:18:33.440 And he killed the first night.

00:18:34.560 The second night, I don't really know what happened.

00:18:36.040 But honestly, Mark, if you're watching, I am fucking livid.

00:18:40.640 The more I think about the event, the more angry I am about how fucking –

00:18:44.900 You know he knows where you live.

00:18:45.540 Be careful with your choice of words.

00:18:46.920 I don't care.

00:18:47.560 If you say that Mark Random killed, people could get the right.

00:18:50.580 It does sound like you were not on your best behavior, Mark.

00:18:52.900 I'm going to be honest here.

00:18:54.280 He did great the first night.

00:18:56.240 The second night, he would not stop.

00:18:59.240 I mean, it was very stressful, like, getting everything set up.

00:19:01.700 You saw what I was doing, right?

00:19:03.140 Like, I'm like, I'm doing the audio.

00:19:04.820 I'm making sure the video is good.

00:19:06.240 I'm making sure people are where they're at.

00:19:08.760 I got shit to do, and we had some technical issues.

00:19:11.960 And I'm running back and forth, and this guy keeps stopping.

00:19:14.100 Oh, here's what it is.

00:19:15.460 Jay Dyer shows up, and I say, hey, Jay, you look like shit.

00:19:20.040 And he goes, I feel like I'm dying.

00:19:21.880 And I was like, dude, you shouldn't have – don't even – why did you come?

00:19:25.000 Like, I don't – don't even worry about it.

00:19:27.460 The guy's like, I'm going to do it.

00:19:28.480 I'm going to fucking perform.

00:19:29.540 I said I was going to perform.

00:19:30.800 The guy ends up throwing up diarrhea.

00:19:32.540 He's like, dude, I got – when we're on Tower again, they give me a note.

00:19:35.760 Yeah, Jay Dyer red.

00:19:36.980 Jay Dyer red.

00:19:39.320 Fucking killing it.

00:19:44.420 So I'm like, we're doing Tower gang, which was a banger episode.

00:19:48.480 I re-listened to it.

00:19:49.560 Great episode.

00:19:50.440 The cum zone.

00:19:50.860 I will give you this.

00:19:52.080 The first 10 minutes was brutal, hard to get through.

00:19:54.660 It was a slog, but I was due to Toad and not you guys.

00:19:57.840 You guys should not have let him talk.

00:19:59.180 But after that, it was fucking gold, liquid gold.

00:20:01.380 I was telling the story.

00:20:02.160 Liquid gold.

00:20:02.680 yeah all right so so i get the note and it says jay dyer just left he can't what does it say toad

00:20:08.840 literally looked me and emily in the in the eye and asked that story wasn't crazy what wasn't that

00:20:15.240 crazy was it did you say that toad wow and emily just looked in disbelief he's looking for reassurance

00:20:21.800 from other people like they're just laughing me for the for the jokes right no it's not a serious

00:20:26.360 situation clint wasn't even laughing it didn't feel that crazy in the moment to me though all right so

00:20:31.480 wait let me just tell you so i get the note now and it says real quick toad is the epitome of a mark

00:20:37.080 i just realized that like if you're looking for mark yeah he's a mark yeah yeah but he doesn't

00:20:41.880 even know what a mark is random oh my god you got mark random yeah so i get the note and the note says

00:20:52.280 hey that next hour of whatever you had planned to do um that guy's gone so i go okay great and i

00:20:58.920 smile and we continue to do a banger show i get off stage i tell toad i'm like we're gonna scratch

00:21:04.600 the whole thing we're gonna like we went a little bit longer for both shows like we're just gonna do

00:21:09.560 stand-up comedy mark was supposed to do karaoke so he comes up to me and his brain now is stuck on

00:21:16.040 you didn't i was gonna talk no no no i he told this toad you this weekend up i gave it was jay dyer

00:21:24.360 jay dyer cringecore karaoke with toad doing karaoke somehow that turned into mark talking about gassing

00:21:31.000 the jews i i said that mark could do his gassing the jews song as part okay that's mark made mark made

00:21:37.160 himself he made himself like a third of this show it was never supposed to be like that i told i told him he

00:21:43.480 he could do a song well he's he was going up there he said i'm gonna do 15 minutes of whatever and i

00:21:48.760 was like i said listen i let toad and jay decide this and if they fucking decided this weird shit i

00:21:54.200 guess fine i don't know whatever i i got other things to do this motherfucker is bothering me the

00:22:00.040 entire time all this shit is happening he's just asking me so i'm not going to be doing karaoke i'm

00:22:04.360 like just forget about it just fucking do your 15 minutes he goes up there to do 15 minutes he's

00:22:09.240 arguing with me after saying that he had 30. i said why would i give you 30 when the headliner

00:22:14.440 is doing 30. this is like it's incorrect it seems like she did longer than 30. she did like 30 35 i

00:22:20.760 don't whatever but that's like what a headliner does she probably did like 40 i would say yeah i feel

00:22:25.080 like she did like frankly after having break and broken no i'm saying she did good like i was like

00:22:30.920 anyway worth so i will say right here and i i told him to his face being retarded by the way not being

00:22:36.680 able to be embarrassed this is this gonna be brutal this is gonna be brutal for mark but i

00:22:40.200 told him to his face i was like you gotta fucking stop you gotta stop and he's like okay and then

00:22:44.440 he continued to continue to bother me and i said i'm gonna get fucking physical with you like you've

00:22:48.280 got to stop before i punch you in the fucking face right now and i'm like i'm like legit getting

00:22:53.000 heated and i don't get heated like that in real life and he like kind of stopped but then did

00:22:59.240 needless to say i just looked at him i said mark next time if i if i decide to do this again

00:23:03.560 i can't invite you i love you you're never coming back you're like it's such a fucking headache and

00:23:08.760 it made my night immeasurably worse and i will say it now you nigger get off my fucking stream

00:23:17.880 now when i look back when i look back and i'm like gas digital like we never asked him to say

00:23:22.520 this in front of gas digital and when he did and i see the response now where they're like

00:23:27.080 like fuck tower gang i'm like i get it lewis and i i'm in a monitor i was in a monetary agreement

00:23:33.000 with lewis okay and we did business together for a long time but like the podcast shit i understand

00:23:39.560 why you don't fuck with the podcast and it's not really us we're great i think we're great we had

00:23:43.800 the fucking crowd dying it's just it's just our relationship to mark it's literally and i still

00:23:48.600 do like mark random i like him but i like him over there all right so so the both of uh revenge

00:23:55.960 i'm angry revenge of the sis goes goes incredibly well i thought tower gang went incredibly well we're

00:24:01.480 on a high and then jay diarrhea obviously and then and then he didn't employ he exploded or he explodes

00:24:10.120 i should say and then and then mark random has to go up there and and do uh you know 15 he's

00:24:16.360 obviously he's he's totally going schizo ruining tops uh you know mental framework and then he gets

00:24:21.960 up there and he does one of the one of the worst sets that's ever been done in the history of comedy

00:24:26.280 um and and he's but he's he's coming on like apparently he didn't have his meds that day so

00:24:31.800 he did really well on friday implodes on saturday but it's like to me i've never i wasn't there for

00:24:37.000 his set on friday i didn't see it so i'm like is this is this the comedy he normally does and it

00:24:42.600 reminded me of brody stevens he's just like just getting absolutely demolished anyways he ends that

00:24:48.360 terrible set by screaming uh screaming a song killer killing he he screams this song about gassing the

00:24:58.680 jews and a jewish lady stands up and walks out it was that lady literally this lady works with my wife

00:25:04.040 she got up and she walked out and she said the next day she was like there's nothing funny she told me

00:25:08.920 there's nothing funny about raping kids and gassing the jews and i was like well actually

00:25:14.760 i mean really i don't know there might be some angles if you really think about it i've made it

00:25:19.400 funny a bunch i don't know i'm sorry you're not that creative but i mean there are that song was the

00:25:25.720 best part of the set but anyway so it's like it's like like really high really high really low and

00:25:31.240 then leonarda comes in and she absolutely crushes it she is one of the best working comics probably

00:25:35.880 the best female comic i've ever seen tremendous uh huge shout out to her so did she riff off mark's

00:25:41.240 craziness like a bunch she made fun of him yeah the first minute yeah yeah okay i assumed he'd almost

00:25:46.520 borline be heckling with the way he was acting so yeah because he was no he's not very like um

00:25:52.520 vocal yeah no he doesn't do that like no during the tower gang so there's a couple times you're like

00:25:56.920 dude shut the up dude well that's clint okay yelling from the ground again i would i would see

00:26:04.040 at this point beef with everybody by the way tough i was i was very angry no no no this is not beef

00:26:09.400 this is well deserved i was i was already getting fucking frustrated with with random and clint does

00:26:16.200 this perfect fuck you clint it was great he's like he walks off the stage and i panic and he gives the

00:26:21.800 mic to random and i panic even more and then he sits next to me off the stage and looks at me

00:26:27.240 literally sits there like this and he has any marks and he goes and top's like no come back

00:26:31.240 on stage he's like no i'm good right here because because the story is all about toad and and mark

00:26:39.240 and mark just keeps keeps grabbing at the mic while i'm sitting there i'm like all right

00:26:42.440 fuck just take the mic dude i'm gonna go sit over here i should have fucking i should have stood up and

00:26:46.920 shot him i was just trying to tell the story man i think i told it in a pretty hilarious

00:26:53.480 no you didn't do you think that if uh if top did kill mark random this weekend that we would cover

00:26:59.960 up for him holy shit it would become like um what's that like this is when you find out who your true

00:27:05.800 friends are what's that movie with like christian slater and daniel stern or whatever and they

00:27:11.400 accidentally kill a hooker and they have to cover it up would you would you help me drag the body to

00:27:14.920 the back i've already said i've already said i would absolutely help top if he killed somebody

00:27:19.160 but like mark's a buddy but like once about i mean he's he's gone so like i don't have the loyalty to

00:27:24.200 mark at that point so like now i gotta i mean i saw how he was acting he can be grading so i'd get it

00:27:28.600 you know i'd be sympathetic to your situation that's all right can we can we please watch the the missing

00:27:33.320 laney edit that we never got to see oh my god hey by the way i just went so before so we were able to

00:27:39.000 top showed us afterwards this is so we've already seen most of seen except for jose didn't see it

00:27:44.600 toad probably didn't see it because toad was so engrossed in getting a uber the morning the next

00:27:49.480 morning that he probably didn't even watch it either but uh we definitely cut out before the

00:27:54.760 straight up like like it's it's one of the best like but okay so go ahead and play it's

00:27:59.880 we couldn't do it because yeah yeah so we try to play it but it because uh there was some technical

00:28:05.080 difficulties and we only got halfway through and put it in yeah so this is the one this is

00:28:11.000 the missing one this is the one that was we showed halfway on today we do it honestly it might be three

00:28:17.720 i think uh apparently three if you get another one of the the live yeah so it might be three which is

00:28:22.840 kind of crazy oh that was tg200 right yeah it was target we didn't even did we even mention that

00:28:29.240 yeah but at the top of the show we did i did i did at the end yeah

00:28:32.600 yeah clinton survive a brutal bear attack and they're telling their story only to good morning

00:28:38.360 america as mona uh mona lehi reports one of the back it created a distraction to save his teammate's

00:28:45.800 life you're gay and jewish

00:29:03.160 people that like that own land and pay taxes

00:29:10.520 versus people that don't pay taxes and don't own land

00:29:13.240 i think slavery is a much better option than uh killing them

00:29:25.560 you ever do an abortion of course i have been looking at dudes lately and i'm like holding a dildo

00:29:55.480 and lube well well

00:30:03.640 could you psychoanalyze toad for me real quick do you think that the

00:30:06.760 fact that he's so obsessed with uh not just not just breasts but lactating breasts and he wants to

00:30:12.440 breastfeed is that is that indicative of abuse from his mother i can't make that call but it's gay

00:30:18.040 but then when the ai gets smarter it just becomes a super intelligent

00:30:31.480 pedophile and that's dangerous wow it's just just a really smart jew

00:30:36.440 i'm so mad that that was not the one that we tried to play i'm so mad that we didn't pay him

00:30:49.000 oh yeah that's right there's a whole how many how many of these we have three that's what i said

00:31:06.600 there's three okay you might be right there might be three now i think about it uh i'm so

00:31:09.720 mad that we didn't pay for him to come down there yeah yeah yeah we were tapped on funds i i

00:31:16.520 came out of pocket for that event so like we did what we could god yeah

00:31:22.280 and we'll have a tranny fund next time yeah hey for real we've um i do think uh we need to start

00:31:29.880 and then at some point throw in every six months rape a palooza then then bro grove then rape a

00:31:35.640 palooza more conspiracy this guy this guy wants to he wants to now do the fucking show he didn't

00:31:39.800 even show up i'm just throwing out ideas for you guys to do yeah can you talk about how mad you were

00:31:45.000 at your wife oh i was super fucking mad it's i can't tell you how much i'm just like there were

00:31:50.680 a couple times i'm like if i just like put the pillow over her face right now like no one would

00:31:55.160 know the difference i can still make it i can still make it tonight yeah and i'm just like

00:32:00.200 i could just like roll you over into your vomit or something jose jose sends us this picture of

00:32:06.760 his wife with her mouth agape like to prove that in fact she had a stroke and it was just it was so

00:32:12.680 uncomfortable it was a stroke it was just so funny because she had this like she was like in the

00:32:17.320 hospital bed and literally like this like this but it was only like from nose down so i did i did

00:32:22.760 it i did her the courtesy of not showing most of her face because you know how women are they're

00:32:25.960 like oh i don't like they're really stuff you literally show the worst part but it's like all

00:32:31.160 you see is this so it's like and there's like never like a throw up bag like right here and

00:32:38.200 jose just like went to a hospital and just found some random woman in a bag yeah i walked into the

00:32:42.760 icu and took some photos and then he takes a photo of this random like girl and i said who's that hot

00:32:47.880 piece of ass and he said that's my 12 year old daughter incredible that was yeah that was a wild

00:32:52.920 comment very clearly i had to fuck with you i had to call was a half jug of fucking moonshine down

00:33:02.920 it was it was a huge amount of moonshine like huge amount yeah it was a lot it was a mason jar full

00:33:08.520 that maybe like i would think um david's wife sorry raven's wife probably uh drank like

00:33:15.640 maybe like one like quick major major shout out to david aka raven for uh for picking up the the

00:33:23.000 slack where jose let us down you fucking scumbag you um but i thought i thought he he was he was

00:33:28.920 great uh i thought honestly i thought the event was just a blast like i like all of our people were

00:33:33.560 there i think everybody that came out like we had people from fucking california nevada all over the

00:33:39.320 place and they all they all had a blast so i like the idea i like the idea that jose is jose's like

00:33:44.840 talking to his wife's like you don't fucking understand you stupid bitch they're already

00:33:48.280 trying to replace me with this guy dude i have to get there dude i can't tell you it's the worst

00:33:53.640 part too is like i was like watching the clock because it's two hours away so on the first night

00:33:57.800 it was like when it like first started happening i like kept being like i don't know is she okay is

00:34:02.280 she not like don't you do the hospital i'm like if i leave right now i could still be a little bit

00:34:06.440 early and like the whole time through i'm just like timing off like what like maybe i can make it

00:34:11.400 how often does that happen how often does it happen not often really like lately uh she's

00:34:17.240 been in the hospital three times in the past do you think do you think she timed it to try and ruin

00:34:20.600 your life i'm not gonna lie it crossed my mind i was like you fucking bitch do you hate me what

00:34:26.280 what what is what is this like are you just trying to ruin my what what's going on they're just be

00:34:31.640 doing that like my wife just before this started before the technical difficulties she called me she's

00:34:35.720 like there's a there's a roach upstairs you have to come up and i was like step on the roach

00:34:41.160 she's like i can't and then i go in there and she's like crippled with fear i was like where is

00:34:44.760 it she's in this room i was like well you have to fucking know when you have to do something and

00:34:48.040 when it's annoying to do other things and they're like you know what this is when this this conundrum

00:34:52.280 is gonna pop up three strokes and you're out three strokes and you're out can't can't seizures be

00:34:58.120 fatal yeah yeah like why why weren't these ones because jose didn't take his hands off

00:35:04.120 they did take his hands off because i i don't know how like there are differing levels of seizures

00:35:09.880 there's also like i'm saying like what could you do to make it like a little bit oh what can i

00:35:14.120 do to speed up the process these are a major turn off yeah but you know you know that you know that

00:35:21.880 sees us she go hard though all right let's do the next lane edit oh yeah let's play this yeah this

00:35:31.560 is this is the other thing that jose missed was and also was funny because clint missed it as well

00:35:36.840 was suppress fest uh which is so because they really wanted to come and clint just fell asleep

00:35:42.040 uh like it was it was like the coolest oh just just shooting guns i was on vacation man yo i wasn't

00:35:47.960 about to go to fucking go go hold like guns that are illegal in 48 states with the the dude who's

00:35:54.360 fucking felon on j6 you sound like you sound like a fucking fed clear dude no i sound i sound like a

00:36:00.600 guy who doesn't want to get entrapped by the feds come get blackmailed with us dude come on how's

00:36:05.080 they're they're fucking it's all it's all clean baby we all good it's leesburg florida baby you do

00:36:11.320 what you want we were fucking out in the middle of a swamp nothing bad happens in the middle of a

00:36:15.240 swamp okay nothing we were good the police were actually there so we were good it would have been me

00:36:22.200 doing it it would have been caused by me it was so funny all right laney edit a liney hobba mock

00:36:26.920 production let's check it out check it out oh this is the one this is the one this is the one

00:36:38.440 yeah this is the one we tried this this is tg200 laniate this used to be an old school tg meme what

00:36:44.120 was the other one what was the other one we just watched before this that was that was the one before

00:36:47.880 we didn't do that episode we skipped the three of you had a threesome of some kind i was watching it and

00:37:05.560 jerking off

00:37:16.280 no you did not

00:37:24.280 you don't tell me how big this dude's dick is i'm gonna mute your fucking mic

00:37:49.000 do they have like milking tables for chicks though with like two holes or their tits to go

00:38:03.160 through and then you can milk them through it does that exist you have such a fucking milk fetish

00:38:07.720 so you know if you quit porn you'd probably become more attracted to women

00:38:24.440 i mean no that's true no i'm just kidding nothing's gonna help you we in the industry

00:38:30.040 call a faggot wait do retarded people die after high school is that true yeah they put them down

00:38:41.400 at graduation they give them the diploma and they shoot them in the head

00:38:48.760 it was september 11 2001 i was really horny can you imagine if there's like an uptick in jewish

00:39:07.400 sperm donation on september 12 2001. oh my god i gotta squirt

00:39:21.560 white people like for me overwhelmingly i'm like god created that then i look at some other

00:39:25.720 shit and i'm like i don't know we can be into a world where the nephilim have created

00:39:35.880 shit and they're just like the shit they created still running around but god was like no

00:39:51.160 god

00:40:10.600 positive vibe but it was multiple murders yeah that's 200 everybody dude yeah that's sick

00:40:17.400 that's so cool would have been awesome we were able to get absolutely killer dude that was

00:40:23.800 dude we pay this guy to do this this is dope i know that was absolutely killer one that was

00:40:28.520 perfect oh man yeah our our technology failed us but that was great it was it was fun watching

00:40:34.360 it in the house it was actually better watching it in the house because it was just like us it was

00:40:39.080 like us five uh san jose uh just like and raven and all the girls and yeah i don't know i videoed

00:40:48.040 i videoed us watching so for those that don't know during the live show we couldn't get the internet

00:40:53.160 to work to to watch that edit that we just played you uh so we get back to tops we watch it i record

00:40:59.080 us watching it our reactions to it and then i sent it to laney just to say thank you it was it was

00:41:03.560 it was a really cool moment hell yeah think about that for a second we make we we for years now what

00:41:09.560 is this three four years we do this uh been doing dick jokes and we've gotten to the point where we

00:41:13.880 can now pay someone to make cool cuts of us doing we've gotten to the point where we can do it live

00:41:19.720 in front of people and literally half the show was a dick joke it was just yeah i don't think people

00:41:25.800 understand like top top lives in the middle of nowhere man like it is it's like an hour plus away

00:41:32.040 from any airport it's the middle of fucking nowhere we had like over 70 people come out for a bunch of

00:41:38.040 fucking idiots that just talk into microphones it was so much fun so much i'm telling you the crazy

00:41:42.600 thing is killer next year's that's that's the craziest shit is that i'm like now that we did

00:41:46.520 this once and people like oh they're excited about it i'm like wow people will more people would

00:41:51.320 actually come out here to do this same shit it was fun the people who were there that were like fans of

00:41:57.000 this stuff were like they were they were enjoying themselves they were laughing i was laughing with them at

00:42:01.880 them talking to them by the way by the way our our vibe is so much better in person i really enjoyed

00:42:07.800 doing that live show having the the crowd like it made me really envious to the legion of skanks guys

00:42:12.760 that they get to do that every every week dude like oh man it's so so good anyways uh i think we

00:42:18.440 got one more laney at it from the event no we don't not yet oh we don't okay laney's in the chat he

00:42:23.720 said it's uh we have this this is what you missed though clint i don't even know you play some of it

00:42:28.920 actually let's do this but we'll skip to the end so yeah the end is the only part that really

00:42:32.760 concerns us the rest of it is just i mean it's cool shit cool this is so funny man it's ridiculous

00:42:37.880 wait a play play a little bit in the beginning so people can see what it was supposed to what

00:42:41.240 it's supposed to look like you dare call yourself a man they give you a gun yeah literally literally

00:42:46.280 you go up and they just go what do you want to shoot and then you just go that one right there

00:42:50.920 and they go okay cool here you go do you know how to shoot this and then you can just

00:43:01.240 yep you take a gun you shoot it down range and that's it oh that's what you're supposed to look

00:43:07.720 like yeah everybody picks up the gun loads it empties the clip next gun please skip to the end oh wait i

00:43:18.040 actually skip to the middle dude he's the man yeah go back go back a little bit so great

00:43:32.680 he's quick by the way he's like super like witty he's a cool guy i like him we should have him on i'm

00:43:39.000 glad you guys got to hang out with him because i i believe i don't know shut the up jose we missed the

00:43:43.800 part you also he did ask to come on our show oh did he did he yeah yeah he said he literally was

00:43:50.840 like hey when are you going to have me on he always struck me as too wholesome he always struck me as

00:43:55.400 too wholesome to come on the show no i don't think so okay all right he was questioning six million

00:44:02.040 with lean on joni it was hilarious even when he touches guns he's built backwards i know

00:44:06.840 backwards it's a little too low on his shoulder i don't understand what were you saying this guy

00:44:11.720 said uh top the instructor i i actually cut the video before he said it but he was like aim at

00:44:17.400 the pumpkin on the floor yo yo he's look at the angle of his gun he's looking through his left eye

00:44:21.880 yeah dude because my my right eye has like it is retarded i don't know what i'm doing this is

00:44:28.520 the scope if this is the scope he's like this yeah this is what happened they go they go look at

00:44:33.160 the red dot i'm like i don't see a fucking dot like i see a blur a smudge like do you have a

00:44:38.200 stigmatism i'm like yeah he started to shake he's like they know i don't know what i'm doing

00:44:43.720 yeah all right turn i gotta turn this off this is just like so loud then i was still aiming too high

00:44:48.280 like dude you missed the part over the berm you missed the top part where uh where top was like

00:44:53.560 did you see him try to push in the safety like uh he pushed it in like this like instead of like

00:44:59.240 you have your finger on it you just like and you're pushing the safety he was like

00:45:04.280 and pushes it in and then he forgets where like then he grabs the gun you gotta work that same deal

00:45:10.920 i think that that was the best evidence to date that the toad is not a fed because the fed would

00:45:15.160 actually know how i don't know about that you you saw the the uh the video of the the navy like

00:45:21.560 straight up was he like a captain in the navy that had no idea how to shoot a weapon and had the scope

00:45:27.240 on backwards i mean secret service secret service can't even put their gun back in their holster so

00:45:31.960 i don't know fair point okay there are like there are probably people in the fbi and the cia they're

00:45:37.720 god skip the trigger is legit because uh top was saying he was watching one time and this was not the

00:45:43.160 aug because the aug has like a um has like i don't know how to put it like it's not like a regular

00:45:48.360 trigger that has like nothing behind it it's a full like you pull it in all the way yeah uh he had

00:45:52.600 another gun like an ar that had you know nothing behind it and he was he had his finger behind the

00:45:57.880 trigger yeah and the guy had to tell him he was like he did the same thing with the safety again they

00:46:02.600 were like he did all this to set up boom boom boom and i'm recording i'm like look at him my hands are

00:46:06.920 shaking because i'm holding up this this ipad now it's an ipad pro it's like it's heavy i'm like

00:46:12.920 hurry up hurry up please tell him see he goes he goes like hey but he sets up he sets up the whole

00:46:19.560 time like still can't see tells us tells the guy the same shit astigmatism the guy's like whatever

00:46:23.800 just shoot this gun dude so he finally gets it safety's on he does the and safety then he grabs the

00:46:31.960 whole gun like this and puts his finger under the trigger and the guy goes with his finger he

00:46:37.240 takes his finger out he goes your finger on the trigger and he goes and then grunts it and then

00:46:41.400 until it proceeds to shoot at least six or seven feet above the target into the sky into the sky

00:46:47.400 and the guy's like he said shoot the floor right in front of you shooting over the berm i probably killed

00:46:53.400 somebody actually what was funny is top top was like listen he was like if you don't believe me he goes

00:46:58.280 here's cole shooting 23 seconds here's david shooting 32 seconds here's uh like here's elizabeth

00:47:05.400 cole's wife shooting 28 seconds he goes here's toad a minute and a half

00:47:13.000 i may have to like next time talk one of my kids in the coming that way they can shoot that way i can

00:47:16.840 see how long it takes them to shoot you you for real were looking through your your left eye into a

00:47:22.920 right i mean that's just it's just amazing it wasn't i will say i will say as much as uh so

00:47:29.240 both the lectern guy and his wife were amazing people really great great yeah the one thing was

00:47:35.000 the lectern guy's wife which is actually what she put on her like little media tag she she so she was

00:47:41.960 shooting the gun from her right shoulder with her left hand yeah which was i was i expected toad to do

00:47:48.680 but it was just really funny that i was like at least toad was better than somebody yeah she might

00:47:53.960 have a problem with her left like she might be a woman but her shoulders left shoulder's bad but i

00:47:58.440 was like it was just really funny because i saw that and like but she was still hitting

00:48:01.400 shit like she still was pinging and like toad you know i think it's a bird i had i know a guy that

00:48:07.240 like he was really poor and he plays the guitar left-handed so upside down he's a bassist the guy's amazing

00:48:13.000 but he plays a right-handed guitar left-handed and he's really good it's upside down it's upside

00:48:18.600 down and backwards so i could never do it but because he was poor that's how he learned and

00:48:22.680 that's probably what she is she probably like is a left-handed and learn how to shoot a right-handed

00:48:26.680 gun this way jc yeah she's she's the jimmy hendrix of shooting dude she's way better than me

00:48:34.040 all right i'm just gonna let that go whatever i just i don't get the joke is it a joke jimmy

00:48:40.440 hendrix jimmy hendrix was a lefty who played a right-handed guitar are you really kidding me

00:48:45.960 are you serious yeah that is that pun expecting us to have this deep cut knowledge of jimmy

00:48:53.800 hendrix and his guitar playing abilities i thought he played i thought he was just left-handed let me

00:48:59.240 see hold on hold on hold on you think people know assorted trivia about guitar players just

00:49:04.040 off jimmy hendrix couldn't read music either yeah most people don't just know that if he

00:49:08.360 talked stuck somebody in the street no one's gonna know what the fuck yes jimmy hendrix

00:49:11.400 played his guitar upside down he was left-handed but played a right-handed guitar that was flipped

00:49:14.840 over and restrung for a left-handed play i'm not saying that it's not sound if there's like you

00:49:18.840 have an it was restrung though it's different yeah oh well yeah sure yes that joke hits so hard

00:49:25.000 with 0.000 dude somebody somebody was like that is

00:49:29.800 cry me a river about that cry me a river i don't care

00:49:33.640 a music festival or something maybe you know is like laughing so hard right now yeah like all the

00:49:40.600 employees at guitar center we're just dying right now yeah no i see you're right to it i forgot about

00:49:45.640 that but it's just it is one of these things where it's no no no it's like who cares though like why

00:49:50.520 would you even make this reference that was for bobby ball bags he got it

00:49:54.280 i was gonna say like for like for like point three percent like uh fucking clint said like

00:50:01.800 it was like oh my god what a great joke yeah everybody else is like it is structurally sound

00:50:06.600 technically but it's just like it's the ultimate idea of not the right time like bad timing bad

00:50:12.920 audience like all the signs of autism essentially i will say though that toad in front of an audience

00:50:19.160 fucking crushes too man he's just like so nervous yo by the way by the way he's got a fitbit on or

00:50:26.040 whatever and and like halfway through the story we keep interjecting and interrupting him he's like

00:50:31.080 he's like losing his fucking shit and he and he goes he goes and he looks at his at his like readout

00:50:35.400 from his fitbit and he goes my heart rate is 130 right now we're just sitting here talking you

00:50:42.280 you never got you never got to because you just got upset at mark random you tell the story because

00:50:46.760 you just got upset at mark random that's right yeah so so anyway i i told the story about mark

00:50:54.680 random because he tried to like stay in my house after toad bought him there toad actually during the

00:50:59.400 during the dinner when we called you he had turned to my mom right to her face and called her mama heavies

00:51:04.520 which is just a wild thing to do the man has no i don't know awareness no but it's a strange social

00:51:13.320 awareness like he will do certain things and won't do absolutely will never do some things that doesn't

00:51:18.200 don't make sense but he'll sit and call my mom mama heavies to her face which is like just incredible

00:51:24.200 anyway so i'm like i i tell i say i'm going to bed mark you've got to leave i'm going to bed and i'm

00:51:30.440 like toad we're all going to bed let him know it's like okay fine i go upstairs show toad the room

00:51:36.680 this is where you stay in feel free to do whatever you're a grown man go downstairs hang out he goes

00:51:41.080 okay yeah i just got to get my steps in so i was like okay fine i go to the shower and my wife is

00:51:46.760 there and she says what's that noise it sounds like like is it one of the kids up or something

00:51:51.320 like that it just sounds like banging and i'm like i don't what the is it so i'm looking around i was

00:51:55.080 jerking off i go downstairs to order mama heavies yeah i no one no one's downstairs face i noticed

00:52:02.040 that toad is in the smallest room in the house with the bed the murphy bed pulled down so there's

00:52:06.280 just a small u-shape to walk back and forth and he's just vigorously walking back and forth in in the

00:52:12.120 room and all you hear is i'm like i like toad you can go downstairs shout out to the chat they just said

00:52:21.160 toad hits his zone two cardio city sitting it's so funny because like yeah this dude he was like

00:52:33.880 he was like i had like 2 000 steps left he's like you got 2 000 steps in like a fucking like yo it's

00:52:39.640 a shoe box it's like it is it's like maybe maybe 12 steps each direction and he's doing it for like an

00:52:44.840 hour i have my house is huge real real i think toad's like a fucking lunatic i know we all clown on

00:52:50.920 mark random but like i think toad might actually be crazier than him it's funny because yeah like

00:52:55.240 tops house like downstairs is ginormous like if he went down there like you can probably walk like

00:52:59.960 i did for a little while i wasn't feeling it explain yourself you know what i really want to do an

00:53:05.800 event near toad one of these days and and go see where he lives and how he lives i feel like we could

00:53:12.040 clint's been there he's got a nice nice little condo it's like it's all it's all it's like totally

00:53:17.400 clean and you're like there's never been a guest here ever it's like here's what we should do here's

00:53:22.680 a cool idea now if if we could make this happen like but this is this relies on audience funds and

00:53:27.720 we have to get more money from the dough but like save up money and the dough this is what we do like

00:53:34.840 go to each one of our states well there's only really three states then we have to go to or maybe

00:53:40.120 let's do four because we could do miami by me or like in between me and jose we'll rent a studio

00:53:45.320 rent uh and then stay with if we're in boston we rent a studio we stay with toad we do a live

00:53:51.480 episode there a small vacation would be fun go to clint's house everybody go get a studio do a

00:54:00.760 live show just like four times a year or something like that expectation is we're all spending the

00:54:05.320 night at whoever's house yeah hold on hold on doesn't clint not like didn't he take his guest

00:54:09.960 bedroom and turn and he's turning it into a podcast studio so aren't you doing that clint or am i

00:54:15.560 i'm gonna do it in my in my uh dining room oh you're doing in your dining room all right so

00:54:21.240 we just can't eat together yeah i'm doing this this is my but it's just but it's just funny because

00:54:26.360 also uh toad's very happy about like he was like clint nashton came up and stayed at my house for two

00:54:31.560 weekends he was like he was so happy to tell us about this it's a nice place he and i watched this

00:54:37.800 like this basically like a soft core lesbian porn uh together yeah what were you what it was a

00:54:45.080 movie but it was basically like a soft core lesbian porn yeah it was the the handmade i think it was

00:54:49.640 what it was called or handmade you guys want to do some mailbag yes yes get our audience the what they

00:54:55.640 pay for yeah let's do it let's do it i don't really care if we give them what they pay for i don't like

00:55:01.320 to be interrupted like that jose legitimately i would i just felt like it was petering off it was

00:55:05.240 a good time to go into that i don't know if you have something else to add we can go back i don't

00:55:08.520 care says you have to wear a trinket made out of one of jose's ugly cats every day for the rest of

00:55:14.840 your life what trinket do you choose um an ear necklace multiple choice or is it just like uh

00:55:22.360 like do we have to fashion something out of the cat's body yeah i literally take every part of the

00:55:27.800 cat like i take every one of cat of his baby cats and i and i fucking kill them i uh i i like what is

00:55:35.000 it called not deep freeze but when you like dry something out like beef jerky like that's what i do to

00:55:40.440 them i leave them out in the sun for a long time you talk about like yeah like tan and hide them

00:55:45.880 kind of thing the yeah but they but they remain they remain the same body shape i put a hole through

00:55:50.520 them and i wear them as a necklace they're all just dead cats like seven of them right across my chest

00:55:54.520 every single day that'd be a weighty neck oh well they're kittens so they're gonna be like yeah it's

00:55:58.760 wild but yeah someone's like why do you have all those balls hanging off your fucking neck

00:56:04.360 i don't know it makes you look like like you're not somebody to

00:56:06.920 fuck with drink it no i would say uh just the cat teeth like the like cat teeth i think if you

00:56:13.000 just took a bunch of cat teeth and made it into a necklace that'd be pretty actually not too bad

00:56:16.600 like it wouldn't be as bad of a trinket to have you outfit like little little fingers nails on your

00:56:21.960 fingers type thing no like the cat teeth and just have as a necklace that's all i said oh it's like the

00:56:27.480 shark necklace yeah like a shark necklace but it's cat teeth but it's a cat yeah yeah i feel like those aren't

00:56:32.280 like i would get i would get gauge uh earring like plugs but then i would put like his cat's eyes in

00:56:38.760 my ears that's that's metal his cat eyes that's metal as shit dude yeah yeah plugs in your ears but

00:56:48.040 they're cat eyes yeah so you have boys don't you no they only produce women god damn yeah wow

00:56:55.800 he's a breeder do you uh so what do you do with the males do you like do you neuter them well uh

00:57:03.480 it's a good question like if it's gonna be like a cat that's like a just for because somebody wants

00:57:07.880 that cat i like that cat like my wife has her own male cat that's her cat uh it doesn't breed or

00:57:12.760 anything but yeah if you if you don't fix them yeah we have you guys like breeding cats you guys like cats

00:57:17.880 so much that you breed a bunch of cats and you have just a cat that you have for fun they insisted that

00:57:24.280 they have a pet cat because the thing is like with the breeding cats at some point they have to get

00:57:27.960 retired so like then so we have to find another home for them so it is like for them isn't the home

00:57:33.320 six feet under it's uh but uh no seriously when a cat when you retire a cat is like you still people

00:57:39.560 you can still sell it for a couple k to as an adult serious question why don't you just ramp up

00:57:45.560 production why don't you just fucking breed because there is you are pressing up against uh how to do this

00:57:52.120 and not create filth animals you know what i mean like you're also basically a kiddie mill type

00:57:56.920 thing the actual demand for this product no there is demand there is demand like they sell like hotcakes

00:58:02.120 i'm not fucking kidding it's wild because if you if you can profit two grand per hairless

00:58:07.080 pussy like all you have to do is sell 50 i mean for legal reasons obviously all this monetary talk is a joke uh

00:58:13.880 but um this nigga isn't paying taxes i am on everything that is applicable i am applying

00:58:22.680 anytime someone venmos me when there's trackable money i of course or in when it's not trackable

00:58:28.360 obviously too obviously report all that you have a uh do you have a ledger anywhere of the number

00:58:33.080 of cats that have been born in the last it's fucking disappeared i lost it in a boating accident

00:58:44.920 i like to think of him being just like my cat ate my fucking ledger like i mean it really is kind

00:58:50.440 of like prove it i mean you're really gonna hunt down all my clients and have this like cork board of

00:58:55.080 like and then he sold to this one and then he's it's almost all profit so why don't you just sell

00:59:01.640 50 these motherfuckers a year i don't think it's all probably gonna be you're gonna get run to

00:59:06.440 issues like cleanliness disease like then you're gonna get bad reputation because it's like people

00:59:12.600 disgusting cat we got they had all these health problems i think it's like a thing if you over

00:59:17.080 do it it's that's not true we put out a good product people like their fucking i

00:59:21.160 hate those cats sweet cats every time i see it's also

00:59:25.240 huh how many are in a litter uh anywhere from one to i think most we've had is like eight

00:59:29.640 probably on average around four okay so four that's gonna sell 50 so that's about what was

00:59:35.960 it for a month 12 litters yeah how often does a litter take once a month

00:59:41.400 i forget it's basically from a female cat you'll basically get one to two litters a year depending

00:59:46.600 on how you time it it's kind of six cats so you need six cats just shitting out kittens and it takes

00:59:51.880 probably one litter usually to get your investment back your initial investment uh so everything after

00:59:56.280 that is mostly profit obviously there's some overhead but it's probably somewhere in the realm

00:59:59.800 i feel like you gotta ramp up your game brother like yeah i mean i could ramp that up but i'm

01:00:03.960 telling you you we are running up against like now being a disgusting cat mill and then we run into

01:00:08.680 other issues now we we don't have the demand because we've garnered a bad reputation sound like

01:00:14.040 you just all excuses for being poor to me yeah it's it's like i i i i'm confused that i'm confused at

01:00:19.960 what the difference is between like but we are that is actually part of the plan we are ramping up for

01:00:23.560 those who aren't aware i've gone down to part-time because i'm basically my wife's

01:00:26.680 bitch now it's 50 per year it's not it's 50 per year yeah it's like you're selling them you know

01:00:30.760 monthly like you would be selling these kittens because i'm guessing you can sell them you realize

01:00:33.800 there's also also ovulation it's kind of hard to time it perfectly but but yes i am we are planning

01:00:38.280 that's what's called a job getting another female or yeah i know he's like he's like this is kind of

01:00:42.920 hard and i'm like yeah but you can make it again it makes this is why excel spreadsheets exist so you can

01:00:48.120 track and then like we do i'm telling you we are going to ramp it up uh but not a lot because we

01:00:53.960 don't want to be like fucking disgusting why couldn't you choose like a less gross uh your bottom

01:01:00.520 bitch because other breeders like are self-respecting like he found a niche that no one's willing to fill

01:01:07.880 i know but like so did i but i sell t-shirts like you sell these these things are disgusting

01:01:12.200 every time i see one i want to grab it by whatever skin it has and throw it whenever we do an event in

01:01:16.600 tampa and you guys come and spend the night at my house you guys are going to fall in love with

01:01:20.040 them we're not allowed at his house there's no way we're allowed in jose's house we can't even meet

01:01:24.120 his wife you can come in i don't care you don't you don't my wife might be like one or only one or

01:01:30.280 two i'm going to spend the night she might be like not all of them that's ridiculous but not in the

01:01:33.560 fucking pussy room yeah not in the pussy room yeah next mailbag well i don't belong in there anyway so

01:01:39.240 a pistolero that's actually a good banger sent a video the other day of a woman dumping maggots in her

01:01:45.640 pussy oh yeah i've heard about that what would you rather eat her out to complete no why no just

01:01:52.440 next question or that is a video on the internet of your daughter oh no oh what just next question

01:01:59.080 this is can i use gummy bears do the gummy bears counter the maggots the maggots the maggots are like

01:02:06.840 oh sugar i hate being that guy but i have to accuse myself from this one this is gross what the

01:02:12.840 fuck um no no no so this is uh i remember seeing something about this not the a woman dumping him

01:02:18.040 in there but a woman had like an infection that actually maggots were inside her vagina and she

01:02:22.840 was orgasming from like the the maggots inside her vagina is this what we've become yeah we've always

01:02:30.280 been this i don't think we've been this yeah we literally raided raided dicks live in front of

01:02:37.400 people like this is too far that was far more respectable you just do you just not like the

01:02:42.600 thought of maggots and pussy yeah i really don't daughter component there's like just so much just

01:02:47.640 gross well what is going on here i don't even like to try to how close are you to your daughter in this

01:02:52.520 scenario like oh my god dude is she some estranged daughter you just don't give a

01:02:56.440 shit about so it's just like yeah whatever i'll go with trust me if there's maggots in her

01:02:59.640 pussy you're estranged there's no there's no way she has a good relationship with her father

01:03:04.200 all right yeah so she's just off doing the maggot pussy thing so whatever it can be her i don't

01:03:08.280 care you think i'm staying out of it i think that's whole libertarian bitch had maggots in her

01:03:15.000 pussy you feel any in there clint next question oh rootless redneck says travel back in time and

01:03:23.000 give advice to one person who and what is the advice it cannot be um fdr don't go to war let hitler win

01:03:30.280 travel back in time you can give you can give advice say that again to one person

01:03:39.960 i would travel back in time and tell uh oh um who's that fucking is it lenny who's the

01:03:47.240 fucker that uh did that insurance on the uh the twin towers tell franz ferdinand to stay at home

01:03:53.800 no yeah no no that's a world war one reference just i would go back and tell myself 2013 to just buy

01:03:59.400 instead of buying uh that toy story 3 movie buy a bunch of bitcoin fuck everybody else the world's

01:04:05.080 going to be anyway do you know how much i think about that i think about that all the time about

01:04:09.880 like if i like yeah during our lifetimes this is a worthless nothingness and you're like this is

01:04:15.480 buku bucks now bro i i had a tenant in 2010 that wanted to pay half of his rent in bitcoin and i told him

01:04:23.560 no wait wait so you'd be rich i'd be in i would be the richest person you've ever met dude so i'm

01:04:32.200 guessing probably like a grand like a grand worth probably no his rent because he was splitting it

01:04:38.680 so his rent was like a grand so it would have been half of that in bitcoin 500 dollars with a bitcoin

01:04:43.640 when bitcoin was like 12 cents probably even less than that in 2010 immeasurably rich yeah because bitcoin

01:04:52.200 bitcoin was like first uh came out in what 2008 or something like that like or something student

01:04:57.320 2009 yeah so oh my god first year on the flip side can you imagine being the guy who spent all

01:05:02.280 your money your bitcoin on rent there's a guy that spent all his bitcoin on he was he was mining bitcoin

01:05:10.760 in my property and he was like hey i want to give you half of this and i was like no i'm

01:05:16.520 this is worthless you faggot man i would go back and tell my parents not to have me

01:05:27.880 and i wouldn't even have to say it like if i just showed somebody somebody has a baby prime

01:05:32.280 no let him talk let him talk no no i just go back and i'm like i'm your son from the future they'd be

01:05:36.760 like oh fuck so i don't even have to give them the advice explicitly like i'm a uh i'm a failed

01:05:43.400 podcaster oh wait hold up hold up so so he walks up he meets his parents he shakes their hand and then

01:05:48.040 he just totally he just slowly fades and he says thank you as he disappears thank you mother finally

01:05:57.880 oh that's great is you your sister's not as fucked up as you though right like mentally or just at all

01:06:05.960 physically uh emotionally socially arguably she's worse no no what does that mean i don't believe

01:06:14.040 you're i don't believe his uh no like i don't believe does she fuck at all i do not want to go into

01:06:21.000 detail about uh well uh does she fuck i mean i don't want to think about that but i assume so i mean

01:06:27.000 she's married oh she's married okay no then she's oh she is far and beyond you yeah she she blew you

01:06:33.400 out fucking years ago blowed you the out you think her husband has a big devil you could be beating

01:06:39.480 her she's still winning for sure oh for sure he has a big dick wait why for sure because she has a huge

01:06:46.200 pussy she calls him this slump continues i mean i mean she probably does because she's 5 11

01:06:57.640 holy no way there's not really a correlation your sister is 5 11 damn it it's like it's like

01:07:04.600 it's like uh danie devito and arnold schwarzenegger but like my sister is arnold that's insane like

01:07:10.200 you understand how sexual dimorphism works like men are typically you have similar genetics your men are

01:07:15.480 typically taller like i don't know it's just it's astounding this worked out this way i'm just that

01:07:20.200 fucked up yeah my dad is over six feet uh yeah i don't i don't know all right i thought you always

01:07:25.560 said your dad was tiny like you no he's like 6 2. he's losing track of his lies yeah so you're like

01:07:31.640 you're like genetically like fucked yeah wow and my mom is like the same height as me mom

01:07:39.960 i don't get why you do that it's not a new worker thing is or boston that is so toad for real

01:07:44.760 though how much time have you given towards how big your your uh sister's husband's dick is

01:07:51.080 not not a lot until now although i mean well the thought has crossed my mind just because i'm like

01:07:55.640 oh this is why this is a tall man so he probably has a big dick so you've been you've been fantasizing

01:08:01.800 about the the piece that goes in your sister's cooch what's wrong with you dude yeah i have to think

01:08:07.240 about it man would you would you be more upset if like would you be more or less upset if he

01:08:14.520 couldn't make your sister come like which which one would have set you

01:08:23.000 i would have wow six billion dollars

01:08:26.200 just did the math

01:08:28.920 that's for only one month he was my tenant for two years that's for one month

01:08:32.760 oh my god i would be i would be less upset if they're just not

01:08:37.240 fucking you would be elon musk dude like i just i'd be worth i'd be worth 70

01:08:42.200 about 80 billion dollars however he should submit to coctober though

01:08:48.680 i think the market cap of bitcoin is like a trillion i'd own almost a tenth of bitcoin

01:08:52.920 yeah did you imagine that how would that work would you a world player like you would have

01:09:04.440 like contracts forged and like you know child fucking sacrifice and stuff at that point like

01:09:10.200 it'd be wild yeah yeah you'd be in some weird did you think about my dick when you met me toad

01:09:16.200 dude not nice guy um i mean like i i kind of crosses my mind whenever i meet any dude

01:09:24.680 do you want uh your dudes your dick to be nice or not nice like do you want to be like a mean dude

01:09:30.840 oh yeah no i want a dude to have a nice dick no not the dick toad when you met when you met

01:09:36.840 tower gang for the first time whose dick did you think about the most fondly

01:09:41.160 yours because you're the tall one yeah you and reed were flaunting it it was hard i'm like this guy

01:09:49.880 i was not flaunting anything you guys were peacocking well if reed counts then reed might be the answer

01:09:55.800 to that you guys were strutting your stuff it's just so weird because i'm thinking about reeds

01:10:01.240 he's incapable of lying which really makes me kind of sad to hear this yeah yeah he's secretly gay

01:10:07.720 yeah he's been clogging this whole time explains it all toad toad walks around skipping every

01:10:13.800 pussy he sees and fantasizing about every dick he sees like yeah i never said are we sure this man's

01:10:18.360 heterosexual like yeah i said if i see that's extraordinarily gay behavior if i see a dude

01:10:23.880 like i'm i'm just curious i wonder i'm like how big is that dude's piece have you ever like put your

01:10:29.640 finger in your butthole when you jerked it or anything like that like to explore no what about your

01:10:33.880 whole fist you answer that so quickly you have you've done it you've done it you ever put your

01:10:38.440 whole fist in there uh nothing goes in the butthole man i bet why not you fisted your whole

01:10:45.480 i bet you experimented there's no way someone who's jerked off like

01:10:49.960 literally double digits in the day there's no way they haven't played with their buttholes

01:10:53.080 and tried to jerk off i bet i know cole has well i do i mean you've seen it

01:10:59.720 i woke up to it yeah oh wait a second hold on hold on your handle up there i i just shave like

01:11:05.400 you know the outskirts of the butthole you know what i mean every time every time cole

01:11:09.880 every time cole comes over we find out something more like some weird stuff about him and this time

01:11:14.360 we didn't find anything out about you cole but you had some uh uh some stuff go on i don't know if we

01:11:20.840 can talk about it can we talk about it did cindy tell you cindy making people up wait what

01:11:29.560 oh never mind then what what no i'm talking what i'm talking about no no no no no no no sorry i

01:11:37.960 probably just said her name just an inappropriate joke listen no no no no no no no this is something

01:11:42.680 else this is like legitimately something this is something else that we don't even know about

01:11:46.520 yeah i thought i thought uh now i'm pretty curious i thought it's one of those things where so

01:11:51.000 you ever fuck and then you walk out of a room and then you see somebody and they're like

01:11:54.360 that person is just definitely fucked oh fucked at top's house walked out of a room okay david's

01:11:59.720 wife is right there and i did i did a whole like i thought like in the house like oh good morning

01:12:10.440 you're sweaty scratch your stomach just kind of fart a little bit and then i definitely thought

01:12:22.360 cindy it's the afterglow it's too obvious no the thing that we're talking about did uh did that happen

01:12:30.200 did you have your meeting yeah oh no no no it was retarded dude it was so fucking dumb dude can we tell

01:12:37.000 the story hey i guess so basically maybe keep being vague the audience is like what the fuck

01:12:42.440 uh no this was like so we're on our way we're on my way down there and my wife gets a call from my

01:12:47.560 father-in-law and he's like he was he was being real he was like we need to uh when are you getting

01:12:52.680 back and she was like i'm sad so she had just told them that we're going down to meet some friends

01:12:57.560 but our son wasn't going to be with us so he's staying with my parents and then so she gets a call

01:13:02.760 later on it's just like um we're gonna have to have a sit down and talk to you about something

01:13:08.520 on monday like he had scheduled a meeting with us at his house on monday at six or something like that

01:13:14.440 yeah specific time and so she like free

01:13:20.280 it's it's our house by the way it's my house too right

01:13:24.680 that's why i call it my house because uh that's why he fucks in it

01:13:27.320 um so and so and uh we were like oh shit like he found out about this show like her dad found

01:13:39.560 out about tower gang and i and like elizabeth was like freaking out like she was like she was like

01:13:46.440 turn around we're going back home we're not going to this thing she was like and i was like no no no

01:13:51.000 we're going and so he's like and so this whole time she's freaking out like wait a second clint have

01:13:55.720 you have you heard this story because you weren't around yeah i was there i was there when he told

01:13:59.720 it okay all right okay so then we so we get back we get down there and everything like she's still

01:14:05.400 like her she's all stressed out about it and then like literally during the first day there on friday

01:14:10.520 night yeah it was dead that's the foot i told todd that i was like i literally called him dead watch him

01:14:15.320 like playing that clip on the phone did we actually make that one of the shorts for the show too

01:14:20.840 i think that was that one of the short way show i think so by the way well well cole's telling

01:14:24.840 this story in the chat i want you guys to tell me if you're either your parent or your father-in-law

01:14:30.680 calls with some cryptic do you do you just try and avoid it or do you just immediately call him and say

01:14:37.000 hey what the are you talking about because i i'm the very aggressive type yeah oh yeah top top was

01:14:42.120 also there i was i was literally like i was on the ignore train so so so basically those are your

01:14:49.640 problem that's my wife's problem like that's your family so uh so friday comes around and i told her

01:14:57.080 i was like i'll call him i guess and i was like but i'll call him like on saturday uh or whatever

01:15:02.520 and so friday night like he he texted her again so this whole time he hadn't texted her and like

01:15:07.400 she said i love you whenever like uh like whenever he was hanging up the phone and he didn't say

01:15:11.400 nothing whatever he said like yeah yeah yeah so we were like oh it's like serious like he like

01:15:15.880 so that's why we were like oh we found the show because elizabeth she said daddy's angry he said

01:15:20.120 daddy's angry and so like uh like um she was uh afraid that she had liked a picture of tops on

01:15:29.240 facebook and then she was like oh my mom went and like looked up like she was like oh they're going

01:15:33.320 down to see their friends in florida and like uh uh they're about to go lynch some fellas they had

01:15:38.920 seen it on facebook you told me so you thought that they had like seen the ad for the event seen

01:15:43.880 that happen between the grove and then looked up and then we are on the ad and so looked up tower

01:15:48.600 game then found fucking all the shit so we were also like afraid friday night rolls around and

01:15:54.200 he texts her and he goes like don't worry about coming monday uh it's no longer necessary which

01:15:59.800 made it so much more weird we were like what okay weird as he's telling he's telling us this as

01:16:05.480 as they're driving to me and i was like cole i have bigger issues he's like i'm sitting at a dinner

01:16:09.160 table with mark random right now and i gotta figure out how to get him to leave i kind of felt bad

01:16:12.360 because i didn't realize what my friends were but then after that i was like but i was like i

01:16:15.080 gotta tell top of this so this here's the here's the biggest question of all of our episodes and

01:16:20.760 all of the stories you've told what would be the most devastating for them to find out is it the

01:16:25.960 threesomes is probably the threesomes is it being retarded or is it you being racist which is the

01:16:30.840 threesome episode has to be the word the three because the threesome episode is like oh man straight

01:16:37.640 like like i guess infidelity sexual degeneracy uh plus i was drunk which i was drunk and like and

01:16:45.880 high like all these things but but i'm gonna go off the board i'm gonna go off the board i think it's

01:16:52.280 probably the banana pudding yeah the dog killing was fine no the dog killing wouldn't be the butt play

01:16:59.080 oh yeah oh yeah how awesome this is the razor in your keister lawnmower football is fine i love the

01:17:05.640 banana pudding just thinking of just he goes like god i can do everything else but are you that

01:17:09.880 fucking of an idiot it's like i like i know this is your daughter so it's hard to be objective but

01:17:15.160 you know this is awesome right he said you let my stupid bitch daughter bring you to a banana

01:17:19.320 pudding festival five hours from your house and you paid 55 dollars a ticket to get in and there was four

01:17:23.720 tables man to be like oh my son is uh ingenuitive like ingenuity right it is ingenuitive he said

01:17:31.480 i want to see where the story goes yeah me too i don't know by the way my mom my mom heard me plug

01:17:36.680 targeting on literally lockdown and she calls me up and she goes you do another show and i was like i was

01:17:42.600 like mom i'm gonna have to tell you like i have to forbid you from ever seeking it out my mom when i

01:17:48.360 was in high school banned me from watching professional wrestling like wow she would

01:17:56.040 die if she watched this show she loved this show but now that you said that it's like this taboo

01:18:01.000 thing and she's going to want to watch it even more because of that i told her i told her mom if you

01:18:04.760 ever want to look at me the same way don't ever look it up she said i promise i won't all right

01:18:09.160 that's a good one his father listened to 50 episodes before finding out a concert while his

01:18:15.560 daughter had a threesome he didn't realize it was cole he's like who's this berserk adam guy

01:18:22.200 this guy fox this guy is awesome so it literally turned out it literally turned out so she like uh

01:18:29.880 i didn't call him and and then on sun was it sunday oh no because it was like because we didn't go

01:18:35.480 over on monday because he said don't forget about it right and then like uh and then her mom called

01:18:40.360 her and elizabeth was like because elizabeth was like you got to call him and you got to tell him

01:18:44.440 like hey like you can't do this shit anymore you can't be doing this like cryptic shit and then like

01:18:49.240 messing up our whole weekend and all this stuff and actually your father might find out about the

01:18:55.560 support blowjobs and don't oh my god if she becomes the throat goat just just go up to him and be like

01:19:02.440 thanks daddy give him a hug give him a kiss her head game was trashed before this intervention papa

01:19:09.320 thank you it turned out that he was upset that he didn't get to keep our son this weekend and so

01:19:18.520 here's the best part cole is like i'm just gonna call him and i'm gonna tell him i'm gonna admit to

01:19:24.040 everything and i'm gonna say i don't know what you've seen but i'm gonna keep doing this show

01:19:28.120 imagine this i was like what they're my friends elizabeth elizabeth was like you need to get in

01:19:34.680 front of it call your dad call my dad and tell him what is up i do a racist show

01:19:42.040 my dad tells your your parents and i was like no that's not happening i'm like when they do find

01:19:48.520 out i want to clip this like the last five minutes and and show them when they do find out oh dude that

01:19:54.520 would be such a great bit if we could figure out a way or a situation where you had to and record

01:19:59.000 you telling your parents about your show dude if this show if this show made like like millions a

01:20:06.440 year like if it was like a big show i would put these episodes and the clips on vhs tapes and i'd

01:20:13.000 somehow find your parents and i'd mail it to them on vhs tapes just tape after tape you know and then get

01:20:19.320 a hidden camera for when they watch it so we get to see their reaction live and just see see his

01:20:23.960 father-in-law slowly pick up a revolver and just put it in his mouth gets in front of it yes hello

01:20:29.640 daddy my friends and i get together every wednesday night and say nigger oh jeez i they were top was

01:20:35.160 literally like call him on the show he was like you call him on our show oh yeah that's such great

01:20:40.360 content you're like listen daddy i your daughter and i travel to niche libertarian

01:20:49.240 conventions and other women sometimes 50 year olds and my co-host watches and jerks off slowly in

01:20:54.280 the corner oh god dude it was elizabeth we were both like super so we actually are going to sit

01:21:02.120 down with them and talk about like boundaries because it's it's ridiculous that they got so

01:21:05.800 mad and destroyed my daddy you have to pay for that

01:21:14.680 you know it's i feel like at some point it's just bound to happen they're going to figure it out

01:21:18.120 yeah at some point i guess so you went to some event already like this is going to pick up

01:21:23.400 what are you going to do what do you mean what do you mean what are you talking about say we get

01:21:27.400 to the point these things grow let's say we just we start doing two a year we do one rape

01:21:31.320 a palooza one fucking bro he mean growth what do you when we can do this takes off and what i'm

01:21:35.880 thinking of here's what i'm thinking i will say this wait wait guys tell me if this is a good

01:21:40.840 idea we'll go go ahead for a call i've never heard of legion of skanks so they're obviously never

01:21:45.640 gonna you will be going to these events every so often and they're kind of big i just i feel like

01:21:50.760 you realize yeah it's only growing going what yeah but it's but like these events are still so small

01:21:56.200 even if i went to now fast or i went to like little i understand that but if like even any

01:22:04.840 i'll be there in spirit i still they still they never heard of those things so if i always said this

01:22:11.320 like my parents yeah but their kid isn't a legion of skank but my my parents don't ask questions it's

01:22:16.920 only her parents and if her parents cut us off who cares uh if my parents cut us off it's a little

01:22:23.880 bit different like sweet the in-laws are gone don't have to deal with legitimately yes actually yes

01:22:29.720 so this is this is what we're thinking about the next time we do it if we do do a two-day festival

01:22:34.600 the first one would be uh doodoo bohemian grove day one day two should be rape-a-palooza 100 because

01:22:42.120 day two was rape-a-palooza it was all comedy it's all funny show day one was insane this is

01:22:48.600 yeah this is really funny and actually revision this actually fucking murdered and i actually told

01:22:54.360 royce when i was coming off i was like thanks for fucking us asshole it's because i was like how

01:22:58.600 do we top that like i was literally like how are we gonna top that we just be ourselves like i don't

01:23:02.840 know i mean we're different like both shows killed that toad i don't want you to be yourself i want

01:23:06.440 you to be better than yourself yeah work on yourself please yeah yeah yeah i put them i put them to go

01:23:12.840 first because i was like not like oh they're opening for us but i put them to go first because i'm like

01:23:17.000 i know that they're gonna come in and the audience is gonna be like just you know not dead but like

01:23:22.440 they're just getting into it i was like these guys are gonna crush so let them go and we'll come in

01:23:26.280 and hopefully ride their wave i think we did i think we did hide us in the middle basically because if we

01:23:30.360 start and we fuck it up then people are gonna leave their seats i don't know i just i will

01:23:34.680 start talking about it was really funny man that jewish rape of palooza and the and the uh brohemian

01:23:39.960 grove need to be separate events that's my feeling but whatever okay so it will it was it was really

01:23:44.200 funny so then you do it you do it jose i'm just saying i mean it was kind of he's not gonna lift

01:23:48.840 a finger but he wants two events per year i'm giving and he won't even show up for half this is

01:23:53.080 this is like five year plan shit i don't even think see rape of palooza in the near future five years

01:23:58.200 total be dead i'll be retired i love i love the input that this guy has in in this no thought

01:24:04.440 this is what it's going to be if we do it again in the same similar format day one will be brohemian

01:24:09.720 grove day two will be rape a palooza that's what it was anyway yeah so it's just that's a great point

01:24:16.040 this was really funny and i because uh so it was me elizabeth and josey and then and clint were all

01:24:21.000 sitting like while rotc was going so we're sitting there watching so it is still a comedy club

01:24:28.040 so people just walk in they see a comedy club they're like we want to see comedy tonight so

01:24:31.560 they'll just walk in so they walk in just random people walked in two black people walked in oh

01:24:37.480 let me tell you about that oh yeah alex called me he called me yesterday he said he ran into one of

01:24:42.520 the black people a paul just just is cast amongst the audience everyone there is just like immediately

01:24:48.120 it was literally it was it was a black woman and a homeless black man for sure a homeless black man

01:24:53.320 i'm pretty sure maybe alex says something but he's for sure a homeless black man and they walk in

01:24:57.800 and josey goes oh no and i go watch look and it's like you know black woman fat black woman like or

01:25:05.400 just like you know like just a black chick like just and like and with the with the white dude which is

01:25:10.040 really funny and i was like and i was like we have to go and now the n-word had already been dropped

01:25:16.120 before they came in it was not dropped after they came in i will say that but it was i was like crisis

01:25:21.960 averted well well it was because then during during mic check i was like nigger faggot like

01:25:28.360 during the mic check one of you guys was like told there were black people in here i was like what

01:25:33.080 that's what i said he was like so there's a black person right over there so go ahead what did alex

01:25:36.120 say about this oh so no uh the black guy went up to alex i guess a couple days ago and he was like

01:25:42.120 yo that that girl that you had up there the comedian man she was kind of racist and i was like well

01:25:48.840 you know it's just a joke yeah and then he goes but it was hot though and he was like holy

01:25:56.120 shit he's i had to call you and tell you i was like that's fucking hilarious i let her call me a

01:26:01.640 he was straight up homeless straight up homeless for real like he was for sure it is kind of it is

01:26:06.760 kind of a uh a cruel twist of fate that leonardo joni is uh totally unattainable to all blacks and

01:26:14.600 also the ideal female specimen for every black their exact phenotype good point yeah you think

01:26:20.920 she's fat enough for her she's the right amount of thickness she's juicy i don't think i don't

01:26:27.560 know i don't think she's fat enough for a black dude i don't know i don't think she did put away

01:26:32.840 i did watch her put away some wings though she crushed those wings yeah she's a lot bigger than i thought

01:26:38.840 yeah she's she's tall she called me weak during her set she was like this guy's weak and i was

01:26:47.240 like yeah i'm kind of like in comparison like she's like i got her number that's gonna lead the

01:26:50.440 revolution you gotta be kidding me yeah top lobster very nice why are you listening to a mexican midget

01:26:55.880 over here yeah she's uh on the top of his head

01:27:05.640 that that's that this is how far america's fallen those are our revolutionaries

01:27:17.400 george washington wouldn't even have put him on a plantation he's so weak

01:27:20.600 i guess we got you gotta go to war with the army you got you know what i mean

01:27:27.800 bunch of retards and spics that's what we gotta do

01:27:32.920 it's so accurate it was it was she killed it she murdered that she absolutely murdered that night

01:27:39.400 like clinton literally came out he goes that's one of the five best comics working right now that's what

01:27:44.040 he said to me yeah that's what he said to me that's what he said to me he goes i'm not i don't think

01:27:48.600 i'm wrong either he said one of the five best working right now i was the one who recommended

01:27:53.880 she come on our show forever ago because i saw her bit on kill tony i was like she's

01:27:56.840 fucking kicks ass she did her bit on she does use the bit on killed what was it was uh

01:28:03.000 fuck what was the bit she didn't kill tony that well like god that was like that first viral moment

01:28:07.720 uh but she did that joke in the in set still killed it was really fun it's really funny bit how long

01:28:11.800 has she been doing stand-up not long right like three years and like that that that's unbelievable

01:28:16.600 to me she's like she's she's so she's so comfortable especially coming out of the hole that mark random

01:28:22.600 dug for her amazing amazing i'm telling you his first night was pretty good the first

01:28:28.680 it was everybody everybody unanimously agrees that i just happen to miss it it sucks yeah it was really

01:28:34.440 funny i think it was made funnier by the fact that like when we were watching him do it we're like

01:28:38.200 he's doing it yeah yeah because we're all going like we we also it was all of us were in the back

01:28:44.360 like right by the soundboard and like we were all like this thing's gonna like y'all ready to watch

01:28:49.000 this like like absolute crash and burn and it came out because he was like i'm gonna do some hacky jokes

01:28:54.120 and he did like uh my girlfriend just told me whatever like a joke like that and he started doing

01:28:58.680 like and then he just started like it actually kind of killed like a lot of them killed and he goes like

01:29:03.000 uh what's your favorite part about 9-11 i know there's so many things

01:29:07.000 he was just like in all this stuff like it's like really funny stuff and it's just funny because

01:29:10.840 it was him like up there doing it uh but yeah it was uh he really he really was off his meds on night

01:29:17.640 two and i think it i think it totally derailed him so you know it happens uh it happens to the best

01:29:23.400 of us schizophrenics anyways uh we're gonna take it to the penthouse thank you guys so much for tuning

01:29:29.880 in and i hope more of you will show up next time because like it was a blast but we could have fit

01:29:34.280 probably 30 more maybe i i don't know i probably not honestly the room was packed but it was it was

01:29:40.120 packed so what uh what top said is that usually they would take it outside at that point uh so maybe

01:29:47.000 next time we were like perfect for the size of that that building it was perfect um but just for

01:29:52.760 financial reasons i wish there's more people there yeah me too and uh buy nato razors by the way

01:29:59.800 oh yes are we forgetting about the no didn't we uh do it go yeah go do the read quick uh

01:30:05.720 uh nato razors man it's the tower power hour slut to the tower power hour bitch no way jose liberty

01:30:13.480 lockdown to the tower power plant bitch read coal top lobster and toad tower gang tower gang tower gang

01:30:25.240 PD lock is truth saying same with lobster colin jose toutis sick no way jose it's the tower power

01:30:35.160 power hours too they made basement all his tower giant tower again tower gang tower gang tower gang

01:30:39.320 congress tower gang tower gang tower gang gang tower gang there made

01:30:43.720 It's so fucking hard to line up the syllables in all of it.

01:30:59.660 I mean, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, that's all, folks.

Tower Gang - October 31, 2024

Ep 201 - Jay Diarrhea

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