Tower Gang - Ep 52 - Pecker Checker w⧸ Luke & Typo from Biting the Bullet

00:00:00.000 what's up retards the funniest 9-11 jokes were written on 9-12 women jerk off dicks like

00:00:05.000 fucking they're an unruly ferret yeah you ever had a 9-11 cocktail it's in manhattan with two

00:00:12.260 kamikazes you see the socialists don't have an accurate answer for this and she needs to account

00:00:19.240 for it white women must be stopped that's right what yeah we can stay horny and retarded longer

00:00:27.340 that she can stay sane what your ass ass to penis ratio ben maybe you could say we had sex but we

00:00:34.020 didn't fuck oh jesus fat dave fuck you man what is up everybody we are back with another episode of

00:00:48.220 tower power hour uh and also i just want to start us off with this i actually got a mic and a webcam

00:00:55.200 so i look good i sound good nobody fucking cares no you still have you we did

00:01:00.720 we got burnt kreischer possibly coming on this motherfucker is like doesn't use my phone

00:01:08.260 dude i'm telling you like sorry i'll intro but like i used to keep like my phone i would have it like

00:01:15.860 here it is right here and i would have it on the back like this like looking right at me

00:01:20.940 and um it would overheat like watching and so that's why like it would just all of a sudden

00:01:26.340 my phone overheat be like turning off every app and i'm like oh my god no and then it would just

00:01:30.720 overheat i don't know what you figured out because i remember there were like the first handful of

00:01:34.580 episodes it would always be like we're limited how long we can go by your battery life you'd be like

00:01:39.480 hiding in the fucking closet away from your wife you're like oh you guys only got like three percent

00:01:45.420 we gotta hurry this up but also like why does cole's uh phone case look like it has skid marks on

00:01:51.020 top of it does he just like slide it like in his ass crack no it's just that's how the it's the rog

00:01:56.380 phone that's what they fucking do man too early to be forcing a joke we haven't even gotten to

00:02:00.100 come on yeah we got toad we got jose and then our guests for tonight are the um biting the bullet

00:02:07.520 guys typho and luke what's up guys what's going on luke is muted yeah dope what's up how's everybody

00:02:16.660 doing i was laughing i was laughing at the intro i always crack up at the fucking intro and i forgot

00:02:22.680 to unmute myself well after it mute you automatically so you don't have to worry about it and unmute you

00:02:28.540 automatically too yeah oh that's actually pretty cool fancy we're using zoom because we're poor

00:02:33.280 bitches and this seems too high tech for us i should just go ahead and let you guys use my

00:02:38.000 stream yard too because everyone does literally everybody's using it all right i ain't gonna say

00:02:43.880 no to free shit dude dude i heard y'all were beefing uh i heard y'all were beefing with women but in

00:02:52.640 the pre-show you were like hey i came on here just to shit on women so i was like all right let's fucking

00:02:56.900 go because y'all were beefing today it sounds like every one of our episodes anyway so well i the only

00:03:03.000 reason why was because the uh i i just showed up on my feed and it was the tappy chick and i've seen

00:03:09.880 another redhead libertarian chick isn't she like i don't even know who she is and i don't really care

00:03:17.740 but she was just talking shit about y'all and i was like of course oh i'm gonna quote tweet this from

00:03:22.900 our podcast account and say we're gonna be on that show tonight because she was like stop associating me

00:03:28.840 with the tower gang people i'm not a part of them or anything like that and uh so i was like well

00:03:34.480 you guys can see us on tower gang tonight at 9 11 eastern um and then she got upset about that so then

00:03:40.940 i told i reshared him or i uh quote tweeted her again with a uh gif of woody uh being dropped and

00:03:48.560 be like oh you're broken i'm i don't want to play with you anymore and then she blocked us and that's all

00:03:54.440 we were doing with her like i don't know i get annoyed with the whole i don't know there's

00:03:59.360 everybody we can shit on i'll shit on libertarian dudes all day i think a lot of them are like give

00:04:06.060 them a cleveland steamer you mean yeah literally shit on them we will literally get it like meet up

00:04:11.220 with them and then shit on them yeah like that nope yeah exactly they're fucking weirdos they're

00:04:16.560 fucking weirdos and uh but like the libertarian women or libertarian sphere women or whatever

00:04:23.860 like dude they're some of the most intense fucking bitches out there like i cannot i just don't know

00:04:31.140 what to do yeah they're fucking wild and i don't know how they exist in the sphere but uh they do

00:04:37.420 because they're all those dudes that would let us shit on their chests um are also in their dms

00:04:42.360 telling those women that they would let them shit on their oh the liberty sphere is full of massive

00:04:46.880 sense like dude the women get so high in their own shit in here and like everyone says we're awful

00:04:52.400 and stuff but the women are nuts dude like i actually put out a tweet today i got a little

00:04:56.800 bit of hate and i got a good couple blocks out of it because i knew this would spurge some women

00:05:00.600 i said what's up reed said seeing how the majority of women behave on the cesspool makes me more and

00:05:05.240 more grateful for my wife every day it's like dude i see the women on here i'm like good god i'm never

00:05:10.840 letting my wife on fucking twitter fuck like i don't know what this effect has on women but it's not

00:05:15.520 healthy yeah dude i tell my girlfriend she's like i wish i would tweet more because it's funny like

00:05:21.040 watching you interact with people and uh i'm like you can just not like it's okay

00:05:25.340 it has nothing to do with me not wanting you to speak which is also true but it has nothing to do

00:05:32.480 with that and everything with just like just stay off of twitter as much as possible you can watch

00:05:37.440 the shit that i put on there but other than that like just ignore everybody because it's intense

00:05:42.140 go on there and block everybody but yourself and just just your tweets on our time

00:05:46.000 by the way i do want to point out that tweet i said the majority of women so there were a few

00:05:51.920 women who like reed in there and got all freaked out and i just blocked because i'm like if you're

00:05:56.100 freaking out about that it's because you feel guilty i didn't say all women

00:05:59.520 if you can handle your shit you can handle your shit but go ahead the best tweets are the ones that

00:06:06.900 you have to choose to be a faggot about like if you put them out and people choose to get upset

00:06:11.540 about them those are the best tweets because they're implicating themselves when you have not

00:06:16.640 directly accused them of anything so exactly that's the 100 that was i was like oh so you're

00:06:21.940 one of these women i don't like i'm gonna tweet all of y'all are faggots and anybody that comments

00:06:26.760 i'm just gonna block them and just be like i was fucking right yeah i mean i feel like that's that's

00:06:32.780 kind of like what we do right like not just with our tweets but with this podcast too we kind of

00:06:36.840 just get people to reveal themselves as faggots oh yeah dude we like you just come on here

00:06:42.120 definitely faggots so that's we we just come on here and shoot the shit like like boys do and

00:06:48.120 fucking just have fun and then people get mad and then we make fun of them and then they get more

00:06:52.360 mad and so it's like okay i don't i genuinely don't care like well fine keep getting mad keep

00:06:57.360 promoting our shit i don't give a fuck it helps with because because you came up with the whole um

00:07:03.040 well kind of the whole yeah you came up with just calling them holes and it's so fucking true

00:07:09.600 like some of these women just fucking holes man just like like that's that's everything they provide

00:07:17.720 in this world is between their legs and between like here and here and it's just like this thing

00:07:24.240 right here and that's all i give you like just like clip that it's the most base thing i've ever

00:07:28.560 heard dude you just kept going i was like wow all the women are good for is a holster for my cock

00:07:35.120 i said some women on there i mean you said the problem and the one sitting in my living room

00:07:43.000 that's about it provides a lot of trouble though it's not just you know the other one doesn't

00:07:46.780 provide much trouble it's this holy oh yeah this whole the other one's for pleasure

00:07:50.820 this one's the punch

00:07:54.980 there's also a third hole that you're neglecting to mention as well that's the off-limit hole that's

00:08:07.040 the vip hole real quick when you guys hear the word bussy do you explain when you hear that do you

00:08:15.400 bussy bussy bussy bussy whatever do you guys immediately only think of it as dude butt

00:08:24.020 because i think it's like it's it's gender neutral it's just a butthole it's butthole pussy

00:08:28.400 no okay because everyone's saying it's gay it's it's but it's boy pussy it is yeah okay that's what

00:08:34.800 i always thought it was butt pussy so i just was like i don't know no i think that pussy

00:08:39.800 no all right i think i'm way gayer than i am now no i just think i just think of a gaping

00:08:47.000 mangina yeah yeah yeah i saw a great summation it was some tweet or article i saw the other day

00:08:56.480 that it was uh saying about how oh they were mad that like right wingers are using bussy or something

00:09:04.180 like that and it was just like the gays came up with it themselves they came up with bussy we're

00:09:09.700 just using the term they made up it's just like there's nothing wrong with this term well yeah you're

00:09:14.820 not well you're not allowed to use it because you're you're you know what culturally appropriate

00:09:19.200 yeah you're cultural cultural appropriating the lgbtq plus i a fucking whatever culture air force

00:09:26.820 did you guys okay you you guys troll in the air force but you see that shit recently where the

00:09:34.200 navy is gonna add two weeks they're basic for fucking uh like basically gay training or whatever

00:09:39.340 the fuck like lgbtq cultural all that all that bullshit wait honestly they need a history course

00:09:45.840 after fucking force is lgbtq plus or whatever it is wait a minute in the navy why would they need

00:09:52.500 gay training when they're already already all faggots oh the gay training is literally just like

00:09:57.120 it's not gay underway it's only queer on the pier so you know that's fair they they get to the

00:10:06.120 pier and fucking just go bang out those fucking those tranny tie hookers that's not even a joke

00:10:10.800 i mean when me and luke were in okinawa together like all the navy corpsmen like i would say 60 percent

00:10:16.740 of them were actually openly gay like all of us and 50 percent of those and 50 percent of those

00:10:24.080 were actively uh fucking uh cross-dressing yet you're still here you fucking loser

00:10:30.740 you know we don't have sorry i didn't mean i didn't mean to step on you

00:10:40.400 no you're fine i did i didn't even i can't read so i don't know what he said you didn't get it

00:10:46.320 hell yeah this is one of our best promoters of the show there is really he is just keep on going

00:10:53.720 buddy i love it fucking keep keep telling how much you hate us to everyone and keep making

00:10:58.240 you guys yeah he's been on our show multiple times groveled to come on fucking sucks big dick

00:11:05.000 for fun like and then you know like when you call him on your podcast yeah i think you guys should

00:11:11.620 let him on this guy sounds a lumpy bitch

00:11:13.720 so i could talk about people groveling to get on podcasts with cole when he was on ours and we were

00:11:26.360 like dude it gets fucking weird and at that point like i just don't want to fucking talk to you

00:11:30.540 anymore yeah oh yeah what if they have a seizure after they groveled to get on your

00:11:34.940 dude that was the most savage thing you and top ever fucking did when you guys dragged that dude

00:11:42.020 because i don't know if you guys are the backstory he deserved it can you guys tell me that i don't

00:11:47.060 drag people unless they deserve it i really don't like i'm really vicious when i drag people but i

00:11:51.760 really give them chances and i really don't do it until they blow it and then i'm like all right

00:11:55.580 fuck you you're getting dragged and then i'm yeah i pretty much i mean my method with twitter

00:12:00.620 or just the world in general is it's like one extreme or the other either i'm ignoring you

00:12:04.360 entirely and there's a certain line and i won't even tell you what that line is but i'll usually

00:12:08.120 give you multiple chances and once you cross that line i'm fucking killing you

00:12:12.240 in minecraft yeah i mean i mean anyone who knows my history can tell you that's true but

00:12:20.680 no i want reed to tell the story of the seizure guy because this is too good for luke and typo

00:12:27.460 they probably dig it this is really savage if they're not aware of it well it wasn't so this

00:12:32.780 guy like just begged me and begged me and begged me to come on my podcast so finally i was like all

00:12:37.480 right fine and uh i right before we went live i said hey dude um you know i haven't really done

00:12:43.320 any research on you or like so you're gonna carry this conversation all right this is like all on

00:12:48.040 you so we were like i don't know maybe 10 minutes into the conversation and completely out of things

00:12:53.700 to talk about like if i i tried to be like oh that's interesting tell me more about that and he

00:12:58.500 talked for like you know five seconds and i'd be like okay uh you know like trying to bring the

00:13:04.200 conversation somewhere i went nowhere and then he had a seizure and i like i was like holy fuck so i

00:13:10.020 killed the screen and i had no idea what this guy's name was uh you still don't well no i know what his

00:13:17.280 name is now i'll just leave it i'll leave it out of this but i don't yeah i didn't know what his name

00:13:20.980 was i didn't know where he lived i didn't know you know where he lives now that's weird man

00:13:25.820 i still don't know where he lives but i didn't know like what state he was in or anything i didn't

00:13:30.780 know who was friends with him i was like so i just posted twitter holy shit and then i'd like tag

00:13:36.480 his name and i was like this guy just had a seizure on my podcast anyone know where he lives or

00:13:42.160 anyone who can help him or whatever and so then he finally like came back to and i just made sure

00:13:47.620 he was all right i was really nice to him and like i i had deleted the stream so it wasn't

00:13:51.680 embarrassing for him or whatever and then um you should have saved it in retrospect it was like

00:13:56.220 yeah i would have streamed

00:13:58.820 like i don't even remember he just like i don't remember

00:14:15.000 oh he called him a shitty artist for no fucking reason like at all no he called him a shitty artist

00:14:21.360 so everyone dragged him and they're like every it was just so savage and then he tried to be like

00:14:25.220 because we were making fun of him for the seizure shit like we went right after the seat because

00:14:28.380 it's such good material how do you not but like i don't even remember what material we're working

00:14:31.720 with but like we were dragging him and uh then he tried to play the card like oh you're just making

00:14:35.920 fun of someone's seizure like that's just shit and we're like yeah fuck you yeah i was literally

00:14:41.120 like everybody only knows you as the guy who had a seizure on reed's podcast my wife is epileptic

00:14:48.080 like you're not gonna get any sympathy for me being like oh you have seizures you can't make

00:14:52.160 fun of me fuck you i make fun of my wife for having seizures

00:14:54.620 dude that's all right that's the thing all right so like that's one of the things with typo and i

00:15:00.040 like with our show we've been through a lot of shit we've done a lot of shit and uh we were we talk

00:15:04.660 about suicide a lot and things like that but we joke about it because it's fucking funny

00:15:08.280 and then i see you that's hilarious yeah dude it's fucking hilarious and it's also 40 percent of all

00:15:15.020 the navy men but it's it's really funny and when then i get on twitter and you see these people

00:15:24.640 bitching like oh my life is fucking horrible i'm gonna kill myself and it's like god i am the guy

00:15:29.700 that do it i legitimately told a dude in the military one of my junior marines to fucking jump

00:15:40.880 one time from a four-story building because i was like dude at this point we're already up here

00:15:45.040 like i have to stand here with you and i'm tired of standing so fucking do it like i don't care

00:15:50.300 anymore and typo comes walking over with this fucking 30 rack like oh what's happening and

00:15:54.160 like oh sergeant fucking luke is up there telling him to jump it's like dude i don't care anymore

00:16:00.000 like everybody wants to die just fucking speed it up like a four-story building is even more

00:16:06.300 savage because they might not die they might just go ahead first of course you did you fucking faggot

00:16:16.840 yeah because that's who you fucking are but uh yeah i don't know maybe it's just the military

00:16:23.760 me too because i do remember having like sergeants that would like yell at you just because like

00:16:27.760 you're fucking up your job or whatever and they were like but they would fuck with you but it was

00:16:32.080 it was hateful but yet funny so you're like you're like how do i respond to this you're like i'm scared

00:16:37.340 and like stuff but at the same time you're like but that's fucking hilarious like i would have i

00:16:42.940 remember there's a sergeant uh man i was buddies with him because i put on a little more rank at that

00:16:46.160 point but he was like he would be like like yelling at some kid like what are you fucking stupid and

00:16:50.080 just be like go fucking kill yourself yeah like as he's chewing out some scared little like not

00:16:55.820 18 year old and he's like go kill yourself you dumb bitch the military is like so miserable you

00:17:00.860 have to like laugh your way through it or you're just gonna be crying and angry like you just have

00:17:05.660 to like put your head down and laugh like that's so that's how we all got through it you just put

00:17:10.580 your head down and laugh and you're crying and you're angry so like it's all at least you get to laugh

00:17:15.360 all of them and the only reprieve is that you can fuck your your buddy next to you and you can

00:17:19.540 they give you they issue you a bussy because everybody has a fucking roommate well if they're

00:17:27.040 in afghanistan it's baka bazi so uh yeah you know it's baka did you guys beat off in basic or did you

00:17:33.780 wait till you got out this is always a really telling question because you're either a liar a

00:17:41.000 supreme uh prude or a fucking savage those are the options i don't remember if i i don't think i

00:17:46.280 ever had time i don't think so i don't think i did i would i remember it was probably two weeks in i

00:17:50.860 would sneak off and be like it doesn't take long guys yeah and you're like i just i remember the

00:17:57.640 girls girl unit that walked by in a waft they're smelling like oh i think we didn't see chicks dude

00:18:03.020 we were chicks until i was like five months into the military yeah i didn't see anybody because the

00:18:09.320 marine if you're on the west coast in the marine corps you don't see any women until you go to

00:18:14.420 your schooling so like it was i was five guys have a pretty long basic though so i feel like by the

00:18:19.580 end you're like dude that boy was kind of pretty girlish looking and that oh yeah for sure

00:18:23.980 i was real happy when the navy fucking guys started cross-dressing that's for god damn

00:18:32.900 when jose says that he's happy about seeing the girl unit he's talking about she-male so

00:18:39.180 yeah yeah if i squint hard enough yeah you kind of look like one i'll just well i saw that

00:18:45.100 i can't remember if it was a 4chan one or something or like fucking reddit it was just talking about if

00:18:51.840 you walk into any barracks it's like you have like eight guys wrestling you have two like guys are

00:18:57.440 here trying to sleep then you have like six dudes crowded around like one computer watching porn and

00:19:03.020 another 12 guys watching those guys and beating off

00:19:06.060 military dorm life and deployments are fucking fun for that part but then it does suck because you're

00:19:14.680 like uh i'd like for some bitches but like it's kind of like prison like i feel like prison would be

00:19:19.500 awesome aside from the no bitches thing yeah we had we had in the animal rape like that

00:19:25.460 ironically that's what also makes it awesome you get used to that

00:19:31.120 that's why we had a guy on oh go ahead that was in the military and went to prison and it was kind

00:19:39.380 of a toss-up for him for a minute but he was like i think i'd do the military again if i had to choose

00:19:44.100 like one or the other does the military have a separate does the military have a separate prison

00:19:48.320 like if you get like yeah oh it's much worse dude oh i bet like if you went to the military prison

00:19:54.060 that would they are there's no there's no there's no gay military shit at least in prison they don't

00:20:01.180 humiliate you and be like all right now we're marching to fucking whatever i mean they'll like

00:20:04.900 make you walk i'm sure but it's not like left right left you're like fuck you in military prison

00:20:10.860 they're still like pretending like you give oh no you're still military you're still military

00:20:16.980 i had a buddy who uh i wish i could remember some of the stories about him because it was amazing

00:20:21.600 i remember the first day i saw him showed up i think it was either like a might have been a sergeant

00:20:26.040 that time or not or like a higher up of like a e4 that i was either e4 or e5 so i was either a

00:20:31.240 sergeant or like almost about to be i remember the moment he came in i was like i looked at my

00:20:35.540 buddies i'm like that dude is on a lot of drugs and so i could just tell by looking at him it's

00:20:40.620 like i can't prove it uh don't let him do anything important on the airplane because that guy will

00:20:44.860 get us hurt but we can have fun with him and we would fuck with a bit shit because he's clearly

00:20:52.360 fucked up all the time and he ended up getting busted go to military prison i remember him

00:20:56.040 telling me about it i'm like that sounds awful drugs are so prevalent in the military i walked

00:21:01.300 into my fucking room one day and there's seven marines sitting we we like decked out our room

00:21:07.300 we weren't supposed to but we got away with it and uh we decked out our room and we had a couch

00:21:11.920 underneath these fucking bunk beds that we made and uh there was so much more room for activities

00:21:17.680 i couldn't resist i'm sorry but i walked in and they're in blues brother glasses you know like the

00:21:24.880 big like blues brother glasses and then fucking white robes that they got from one of the hotels

00:21:31.320 and they're just blitzed out of their minds sitting on a couch not watching anything there's seven

00:21:36.700 dudes on this fucking couch three four on the fucking couch three on the floor and they're the

00:21:41.700 tv's blank i they were like the music then the music ended a while ago can you turn it back on and i'm

00:21:47.020 like dude what the fuck are you guys doing in here and they're just like fucked up on triple c's and

00:21:52.780 what triple c's are this is how stupid the military members the marine corps military members are

00:21:57.720 triple c's is like uh just no it's it's fucking mucinex i don't know it's literally

00:22:05.180 it's mucinex that you just take a lot of mucinex and then ride through the like comatose that you

00:22:12.220 get from it and then you're fucking high yeah you're fine it's like it's like quaaludes it's like kind

00:22:17.360 of how quaaludes is like where you're similar but not near as high the military is a great argument for

00:22:22.380 why drugs should be legal because the guys in there do the weirdest shit just because they're like but i

00:22:26.540 can't i can't pop positive my piss test dude let me tell you how desperate people get for like

00:22:33.560 uh substance abuse in the military when i was in boot camp this one dude found out that if you put

00:22:39.720 salt in hand sanitizer that separates the solution from the alcohol so the alcohol is all at the top

00:22:45.240 and then the bottom half is just the solution so when we were in boot camp this dude was getting

00:22:49.680 drunk off hand sanitizer

00:22:50.940 he got publicly njp'd which is like article 15 or whatever the fuck you air force people call it i

00:23:00.680 don't i don't i think it's article 15 it is yeah but isn't it like crazy isn't like 90 alcohol like

00:23:07.640 it's basically like oh yeah it's quick it was like three shots you haven't had any kind of alcohol

00:23:14.700 for three months you put it on a humvee and it'll drive for like 15 miles like it's pretty insane

00:23:20.300 yes

00:23:20.800 100 ethanol like it's just fucking intense

00:23:26.160 yeah i do remember at one time me and my buddies we tried to do that thing and i think we did it

00:23:31.580 wrong i remember what we took but like we just sat there for like three hours like you feeling high

00:23:35.260 no are you feeling high like fuck what did we do wrong i think we took leave and everything because

00:23:41.480 we're like just in case we don't know if there's a pop positive

00:23:43.860 but yeah i know i know that the guy i was talking about he how he got busted is uh i remembered it

00:23:53.260 now on the story so there's multiple other stories because there were like multiple times we're like

00:23:56.400 i think this guy's kind of fucked up they're like yeah well we can't prove it but i guess like uh in

00:24:00.880 the dorms or whatever like the military housing or whatever for like the people who aren't allowed

00:24:04.780 to live off base yet they fucking like they bring you your air filters and then they watch you swap

00:24:10.480 them to make sure you actually do it and like and apparently the lady who brought to him some

00:24:15.200 sergeant or whatever like said that he fucking went like this and then like just kind of act

00:24:21.580 like was acting like like the thing is up and up like you have to get a ladder like but he's just

00:24:25.880 on the ground like hand unscrewing the things putting it in and then like and she's kind of like

00:24:32.760 what the fuck like he's not actually doing it you know because it's like you have to it's like up

00:24:36.880 you know and then like i guess like he got talked to like i talked to him later it's like yeah i guess

00:24:42.280 in my head i floated up i unscrewed it put it back in and i was like it didn't turn to her i was like

00:24:50.480 we had this weird fucking guy in our unit in japan and uh he was a fucking weirdo and he had this blow-up

00:25:14.780 doll that you carry around with him while he was at parties and shit and it was like funny at first and

00:25:20.300 but then it stopped being like funny when he like started referring to it

00:25:29.120 we wouldn't have even cared if he fucked it but he like he was like we're going

00:25:37.100 wrestling making out of the corner yeah like it was it was his girlfriend and so

00:25:42.760 like fingering at the party it's just like he's like dressing it up he's like fucking dressing it

00:25:51.580 up and shit but was it like when it was really expensive like real dolls or was it was like

00:25:55.380 it was literally it was literally plastic like the plastic funny ones that you get at spencer's

00:26:02.080 and uh with the huge mouth yeah with the huge mouth his dick definitely didn't fit in it like he was

00:26:08.980 that he was a weird guy and so it started to get weird well he was like the triple c master like he

00:26:16.860 was always on like trying to get fucked up like that makes sense why he thought this fucking blow up

00:26:22.160 doll was his girlfriend but anyway he was fucked up on triple c's my roommate at the time and a couple

00:26:28.120 of my other buddies snuck into his room took the blow up doll and then took it down to the bottom

00:26:34.320 of the barracks and then sacrificed it to satan they pulled up a fucking chant a satan chant

00:26:44.520 the seance or some shit yeah yes and they they sprayed around it with lighter fluid and then made a

00:26:52.220 a pentagram yeah a pentagram and sacrificed it in the middle of the pentagram it's burning

00:26:59.480 and there's a pentagram around it and they were jumping around it singing the chant and this kid

00:27:06.380 was like oh my god my girlfriend he's sacrificing him to satan i'm gonna fucking kill myself i'm gonna

00:27:13.120 kill all of you i'm gonna fucking kill myself and then he disappeared for like three days

00:27:18.600 and they ended up finding him on like walking that wasn't he like walking down the highway

00:27:24.780 in japan or something like that that's where they picked him up or no no no no he didn't disappear

00:27:30.760 that long he disappeared like only that night but they found him in his room and he took a lot more

00:27:38.360 uh triple c's than usual and he tried a lot more mucinex yeah he tried to kill himself

00:27:44.600 he tried to overdose on mucinex yes look man he got kicked out of the brain this man has the

00:27:51.000 driest nose i've ever seen

00:27:52.860 i tried to kill himself because they we sacrificed his doll as satan okay you don't mess with a man's

00:28:07.520 hole man even an inflatable hole uh i feel like that guy's gayer than like actually all the navy

00:28:15.960 guys fucking each other though like rogue rogue said that a buddy was in the military uh said they

00:28:22.240 said they had to go to warehouse when they got their locked doors and drug tested everyone yeah

00:28:25.500 that's that's pretty common they do shit like that i mean at least in the air force i don't know

00:28:28.680 if it's you guys it would be this like they never really like tricked you into it it was kind of like

00:28:33.680 hey we're all going to the fucking whatever place but it was always a wink wink like they

00:28:37.820 wouldn't tell you because they're not allowed to but it's like you fucking know and it's like

00:28:40.380 you know there's no way out of it anyways so it's like we went to those we went to the pool and uh

00:28:47.080 shut the fuck up cool let our guests talk we went to the field one time for training it was like

00:28:53.580 a month and a half training scenario so like you know a lot of guys were like well this is a

00:28:58.220 perfect time to do drugs because when typically when you're out training they don't drug test you

00:29:03.440 and then like two weeks in they were like hey we're doing a random drug test and like 30 people

00:29:08.680 bopped i'm not even joking it was like 30 are you just like do you get do you go it's zero tolerance

00:29:15.500 you're administrate administratively separated instantly well i mean it's not instantly i shouldn't

00:29:21.640 say that but alcohol is fine right like getting like drunk is fine yes getting well abusing alcohol

00:29:30.120 is completely fine until you get caught doing something else while abusing alcohol oh i see

00:29:35.600 yeah or if you like i guess 12 shots in doesn't excuse you i will say i mean this may be different

00:29:43.440 for you guys and i don't know how long you guys were in buzzing for 11 years so i i mean this is also

00:29:48.300 just hearsay from people who've been in the pretty much everyone ever known who's gotten busted for

00:29:52.500 that shit like that fucking sang like a bird like so i and but the thing is i've looked into the rules

00:29:58.940 before at least in the air force they will retest you later so if you do like if you're in the

00:30:05.480 military you can go ahead and listen to me now anyone who's in the military or whatever and you get

00:30:09.700 busted you you know you're about to piss hot don't say a fucking word deny deny deny and then just like

00:30:16.680 don't do any drugs and then piss clean on your next one and like i don't know i mean everyone

00:30:21.140 i've ever known that's gone busted fucking like sang because they send their fucking osi office

00:30:26.860 special investigations to come grill them and yeah you'll probably have that but don't be a

00:30:31.340 fucking weak little bitch like just fucking like just be like i don't know what you're talking about

00:30:35.380 i did no fucking drugs i did no drugs i did no drugs this goes for any time you get caught for

00:30:40.400 anything like deny deny deny yeah always deny just never just be like no i didn't know i did it

00:30:45.960 and don't even give him a story don't give him any story give him a story just just say i did

00:30:50.540 nothing i didn't do any drugs and feel like well what what happened here what happened there i don't

00:30:54.060 fucking know i mean by the way this is a very lesser than y'all's but i got kicked out of college

00:31:00.300 for uh fucking my wife but for fucking your wife yeah i went to a really christian conservative college

00:31:08.380 that like and yeah we got kicked out oh so you really are fat yeah how old was she at the time

00:31:13.440 i don't think that has anything to do with this that's totally besides the point i'm just not

00:31:24.040 allowed near schools anymore we still got married so it was fine but what if she was 12 we're married

00:31:32.780 now he's almost 18 finally so y'all can shut the fuck up daddy as russell officiated there

00:31:41.980 no dude what uh what is like because in the same thing they would be like hey did you do this and

00:31:50.900 to me at looking back on it all i do is say no i didn't do it no i never went out i went everyone

00:31:55.940 off campus they're like well we had people say that you want i don't nope didn't prove to do it

00:32:00.300 and like just stay there all day because they don't have any proof they just have like

00:32:03.740 he said she said even less than a positive test they found the blue jurassic hole yeah

00:32:09.620 even if they have your piss that's hot and even then they have people that are fucking saying you

00:32:18.720 did it even that that's all they have you can just say no no no no no no no no no and as long

00:32:24.520 if you piss like normal next time okay like yeah i mean maybe they could still get you but it's like

00:32:30.900 you have this case you have a possible denied ability for because there's so many there's so

00:32:39.620 many dudes that i've known that have actually like i had like a false positive they're like

00:32:44.080 no i didn't i i honestly believe the people that i was like i don't think that they were doing

00:32:49.440 anything and they get caught up in it and you know they're like i didn't piss you either mixed it up

00:32:56.360 and usually once they go and do the investigation even if it was your piss like there's something

00:33:02.720 wrong there's always it's the fucking military somebody always fucks something up yeah so there's

00:33:07.160 something wrong with it or and it gets thrown out and but the only thing i was gonna say was

00:33:12.020 yeah i've heard that that's a rumor in the air force too they do i've never heard anyone confirm

00:33:26.640 it and i never trusted it completely because if that is the case you can always just fucking be

00:33:30.500 like well then fine i'm doing drugs all the time so what they do is like they take like i don't know

00:33:40.240 if you guys ever seen it before but they take like it's like a box and there's like 10 of them

00:33:44.620 10 piss cups in a box and they pour a little bit of each piss cup in one like test container so if

00:33:51.600 one of the boxes pops they test in of the cups to make see like okay which one of these is the one

00:33:58.820 that's fucking like but at that point they're all open so now there's a chance for contamination

00:34:04.760 contamination and everything else and there's a plausible deniability one person that doesn't

00:34:09.420 understand plausible deniability is fucking typo that's how he got i was 22 and he ratted himself

00:34:16.440 out for something for doing something that he didn't even like he didn't even do anything wrong

00:34:21.740 he was protecting a junior marine and he didn't define rate

00:34:25.320 so with that cole uh his college also tested him by making him piss

00:34:35.220 so they could just see if he had just fucked by seeing if the stream

00:34:38.260 in the military no is yes and yes is anal that's all

00:34:45.420 yeah he fucking got njp for some stupid shit because he ratted himself out and his junior

00:34:53.660 marine the guy that got in trouble was like i didn't say shit but i guess

00:34:57.700 they play good cop bad cop bullshit and they basically short story of it

00:35:02.780 then my junior marine went in first then he went out the other side and then i went in

00:35:08.360 and then they're like your buddy just ratted you out and told us everything and i was like oh fuck

00:35:13.040 well here's the story that's the biggest bullshit that's how that's how they got me and my wife

00:35:18.300 it's totally different story totally different

00:35:20.180 we have her birth certificate here she's clearly 13

00:35:26.420 they told me they were like uh they told me they were like she's 13 and i was like no fucking

00:35:34.380 get out of here like she can't there's no no but they told me like they literally told me

00:35:40.080 without even talking like well i guess they did pull us out and they came back in and they were

00:35:44.300 just like yeah she said that uh that y'all went off and had sex and they told her this exact same

00:35:49.740 thing that i said and i was just like this is a christian school and you're blatantly lying to me

00:35:54.560 it's just like but it's awful it's awful what else would you expect from a christian school like the fuck

00:36:00.260 you guys ever pulled dick watch duty i did it wasn't that big of a deal i actually thoroughly

00:36:05.900 enjoyed it yeah i mean like no one actually looks like i could legit probably have someone look me

00:36:10.600 and i'd be like yo dog uh just look away because you know what's up wink wink wink and i'd be like

00:36:16.660 whatever i don't care so we had we had this like really douchebag guy that like he kind of just

00:36:22.640 picked up and i don't know if you've probably seen this too jose where some people like get nco and

00:36:26.680 they kind of get like kind of hard dick for a little bit oh yeah this guy like he was like a

00:36:31.340 pecker checker for the piss test and he was and he was dude and he was like they make you watch him

00:36:37.440 to be for those who don't understand they they take people it's a regular duty they swap people out

00:36:41.580 they make you watch the urine test to make sure because they like they don't let they don't hand

00:36:46.040 you a cup and say go piss because that leaves you so much room to fuck with it hang on hang on

00:36:49.940 let me tell my story let's get to both sides now that i've set the stage so you know what it is so

00:36:56.880 this one guy was taken a little too seriously where he was like legitimately like getting real

00:37:02.160 close checking dicks and stuff which is not not normal what people do usually yeah and this one

00:37:07.980 guy balls let me follow the ball and this guy yeah yeah he was taking it let me check on yes

00:37:13.600 right you gotta and then this man so this guy was like standing at the urinal and this nco was

00:37:18.780 being like a douchebag and he's like you know what i actually have to sit down and pee and then

00:37:23.080 he sat down went spread eagle and stared this dude in the face and was like make sure you check and i'm

00:37:30.100 not i'm not faking this and then the dude like he chilled the fuck out after that he didn't even

00:37:34.920 come near anybody anymore that's the thing about the marine corps that's awesome i mean it's kind of

00:37:39.660 like the military in general there you try a motherfucker there's some dudes that will try you

00:37:44.060 back they're like all right bet you want to be a dick about this like yeah all these guys

00:37:48.680 you're retarded enough to join the military don't yeah exactly especially well especially

00:37:53.980 the marine corps like you got to be a little bit of a psychopath i feel like to join the military in

00:37:58.880 general but like the marine corps it's meant for like outcasts degenerates and people that won't go

00:38:04.540 anywhere else in life which is why i do a podcast for libertarians um but like you know it's it's just

00:38:10.600 one of those things where like you just have to be like a certain type of person and there's people

00:38:15.740 that fit through those cracks that and it's dudes that are trying to prove something that's why they

00:38:20.220 oh yeah they're really trying to prove something which is really retarded too just like you're going

00:38:25.300 to the military to prove something it's like yeah the great thing is being someone who's actually

00:38:30.900 sort of smart in the military like i'm i i'm not like among in our sphere the libertarian sphere i don't

00:38:36.400 see myself as like one of the best or anything but in the military i'm a goddamn genius and like

00:38:41.220 but i still look like really good public school but like i still look like me though so people

00:38:48.200 that had a tendency to underestimate me and think i'm some retard and then they'd fuck around and

00:38:52.100 find out and i'd be like oh you want to give me paperwork well i know how to do do this and i can

00:38:56.180 write i can write amazingly compared to your retarded ass and you're gonna look really stupid when this

00:39:00.580 goes up to the first shirt's office like okay fucking try me bitch it's like a guy anybody above

00:39:07.200 room tipster iq is just like a genius in the military yeah exactly yeah oh my god yeah i would

00:39:14.440 tell people my asvab score and they'd be blown away like oh my god and i'm a mechanic too so i was like

00:39:19.960 it's not like that's where they send the retards because i failed out of like spec ops so like yeah

00:39:25.220 i was a radio operator so like you're not supposed to be the biggest and brightest that's for goddamn

00:39:29.640 sure you have like a six second lifespan in a firefight because you have a 10 foot whip antenna on your

00:39:35.140 back so it's like whatever like nobody expected shit from me and then it's like all right i talk

00:39:41.820 i would talk kind of ghetto because i grew up in the fucking ghetto and then when i had to turn it on

00:39:47.940 i'd fucking code flip real quick and be like all right sir here we go we can talk like this too and

00:39:54.600 totally talk down to somebody that's a higher rank than you and they can't even spell their own last

00:39:58.600 name it's like fuck you dude suck my dick dicky's in the uh comments dropping his uh i don't know

00:40:06.540 the asvab and d-lab or whatever the fuck and i had the same asvab by the way i don't know i never did

00:40:11.540 a d-lab i had a 90 i did a 97 or 98 i forget which one it was but i think i did a d-lab dude that shit

00:40:16.580 was actually kind of hard i have no idea is that the language one the d-lab yeah it's it's to see how

00:40:23.280 well you are at learning a new language and it's like you have to take a test and they basically

00:40:28.320 uh explain to you what this completely made up fake language is that i don't know what it's based

00:40:33.780 in and you have to like figure out what the words mean and it was fucking hard sounds awful i could

00:40:38.580 barely read dude it's like i'm most i wonder how many of the guys in how much the military is literally

00:40:46.560 illiterate or like close to illiterate dude all right let me put it this way the cutoff for i think

00:40:52.600 the air force around the time i joined and the air force had the highest asvab cutoff at the time

00:40:57.800 i don't know what it's now i got a 98 or 97 i now i'm like forgetting which it was but one of those

00:41:03.220 two on the asvab out of 100 the cutoff is like 35 the air force that's the highest one

00:41:11.000 dude the cutoff in the army which i think the army was actually the lowest which everyone assumed it

00:41:17.140 was marine well rightfully so but the army is like 30 and ours is like 32 which is not much better

00:41:23.300 god that is well and how much how much does the do those five points matter like

00:41:28.660 it's literally a brain cell per point

00:41:32.980 yeah well you're gonna drink hand sanitizer and get rid of those points

00:41:38.020 so the the thing i find interesting is people who can laugh at really dark humor it's because

00:41:45.780 they've actually been through something tough yes or at least difficult like i haven't been in the

00:41:50.740 military but i used to work on power lines and sometimes we were working like 30 hours straight

00:41:54.900 putting power lines back up and you just needed like the most fucked up humor to keep you going

00:42:00.020 yeah and like the the funniest like the funniest jokes i've ever heard have been on a job site not

00:42:06.740 uh from a comedian and then you have like unironic faggots who get offended over because

00:42:12.980 they've never had to do anything hard in their lives like they've never had

00:42:17.620 no they've done enough hard things okay

00:42:21.860 how hard it is to get a girl when you look like that and you act like that

00:42:25.460 does he look lumpy yeah he's a lumpy bitch he is dude like he's literally that wojack of like

00:42:35.140 the the the the fat guy with the the the glass man tits that's on the computer you know what i'm

00:42:40.260 talking about like someone might i don't know i'll have to find it later and show you by the way

00:42:45.300 any grip said that the cutoff for the army was 18 in uh 2005.

00:42:49.220 there was people getting old there were there was people in the early 2000s that were literally

00:42:58.100 getting the choice you can go to prison or you couldn't join the military like that that was

00:43:01.780 like an actual thing happening so that's how my stepdad went in yeah i mean it's like it's a true

00:43:06.980 fucking thing i feel like that should be that you do that but with the homeless just like you can be

00:43:10.820 homeless or you can be in the military like you like or like you go to jail well here's the here's

00:43:15.940 the catch though is like you get to be homeless when you get out of the military yeah for like

00:43:22.180 two or four years you're not gonna be homeless you're just gonna you may die it's like the nfl

00:43:27.220 players are rappers and they blow all their money and then fucking go right back to being in the ghetto

00:43:31.380 again well yeah yeah or or if you do have a home you like murder your entire family and then you

00:43:37.220 wind up in prison anyway yes you have major brain trauma from getting it would be really funny if they

00:43:42.260 did like if you don't kill yourself if that was a thing though and so they go to homeless guy and

00:43:46.740 they're like all right you have the choice either military or jail and he was like i was already in

00:43:51.700 the military it's just like ah it's like you have to go back in man it's like fucking dave smith

00:43:57.540 he's throwing all those homeless people on playgrounds back in the military funding the

00:44:01.300 industrial would it be in a better country if that was real though i mean think about it just

00:44:06.740 i mean i don't know i actually think like i don't i don't think it changes anything i don't know when

00:44:15.220 you guys got out but i actually like while i was in i kind of missed that culture that clearly existed

00:44:21.460 before of that because you would talk to old timers or like your parents and they would tell you how it

00:44:26.260 used to be and it actually sounded dope it was like that when at that time when it was like anyone

00:44:30.420 wants to come you're a fucking degenerate piece of shit like you need a job like you end up with

00:44:34.340 this dude's rock type environment but it's also really degenerate and fun and like but now as time

00:44:39.700 goes on it's getting more and more pc and like getting gayer and gayer and like i i don't know

00:44:44.820 like i actually think if they went back to that they'd probably see a resurgence in the military which

00:44:49.620 i don't want like i know when i got out like a year ago like fucking people everyone wanted out

00:44:55.620 like it was most people anyone was still in was either because they were like you know bright-eyed and

00:45:00.580 bushy-tailed or because they were fucking like completely playing the system accepted it but

00:45:06.020 the majority of people were like if i could fucking find a job i'd be out like yeah yeah

00:45:11.860 i don't know man i think when i was sorry when i was in the when i was in the marine corps so my

00:45:17.140 last year in the marine corps was donald trump's first year as president and boys let me tell you

00:45:24.180 the marine corps fucking love donald trump i mean they lost his they were losing their minds i mean

00:45:31.140 i i this is kind of a backstory with the marine corps but general james mattis is literally jesus

00:45:36.500 christ in the marine corps and i'm not even joking he might be i don't know but when he made general

00:45:42.900 james mattis as the secretary of state or the secretary of defense oh my god dude the excitement

00:45:49.540 the enthusiasm it was actually like i mean that night i did yes like guys like i don't think you

00:45:58.100 understand how like pumped everyone was and like just that atmosphere was actually kind of cool like

00:46:03.540 i didn't really agree with it at the time but like whatever this atmosphere is cool and then i went from

00:46:08.580 that to asu university and it was the exact fucking opposite and it was all the air out of the sail dude it

00:46:18.500 was so miserable going from the marine corps to asu where like everyone hated me if i even said

00:46:25.620 a word well that's because i don't know the word was fuck or faggot

00:46:32.180 you see johnny 21 jump street you remember that like when he goes back uh to like high school and

00:46:36.740 like like channing tam's character is like what's up faggot and like

00:46:39.780 like that's how it felt dude yeah he was like you punched the first motherfucker that

00:46:47.620 steps up to you and he'd like punch the guy and he's like you punch because i'm gay he was like

00:46:51.060 no i didn't even know you were gay

00:46:56.020 yeah everyone's two strapping it one strap yeah it's not looking cool anymore

00:47:01.220 dude oh but i remember like that thing going around right when trump first like got it maybe the

00:47:06.260 the year after and they were talking about how uh whenever obama got in like nobody signed up

00:47:10.900 to be secret service and like when trump got in like all these marines signed up to be secret

00:47:15.060 certain like they had like so many people trying to sign up it's like yeah i mean there's something

00:47:18.980 to it like they just love this fucking guy like well and honestly he was another one that ran on

00:47:23.940 ending the wars like that's something that we always talk about the last three presidents have

00:47:29.140 have ran on ending the wars in iraq and afghanistan and the veteran presidents and the military

00:47:34.740 presence on those elections are clear as day they i mean ron paul's biggest donators were

00:47:41.380 fucking veterans trying to end the wars and it's it's because nobody wants to

00:47:46.020 fucking be in them anymore everybody that goes there is like this is fucking bullshit i'm tired

00:47:50.020 of my friends getting blown up and killing people that don't fucking care trump was like a weird mix

00:47:56.180 of like end the endless wars but also fuck them up like he was like

00:47:59.940 like we're gonna bomb the shit out of him like dropping moabs and like yeah yeah that was after

00:48:07.540 that that was after he got elected right like yeah well no no even when he was running it was

00:48:12.340 we're gonna i'll bomb the shit out of him we're gonna kill the oh yeah because he also didn't

00:48:16.100 he say he was gonna like uh when he was we don't use that about north korea didn't he also just like

00:48:20.980 like oh my god yeah that was insane told we were going to north korea and typos last year he was

00:48:28.180 like his jet like there was a general that showed up and was like get ready because we're going to

00:48:32.180 north korea god oh yeah so scary oh yeah he also said we don't use our nukes enough like there was

00:48:39.540 that whole he didn't know what the nuclear triad was and marco rubio explained it and then like

00:48:44.020 after the debate there was an interview and trump was like well i think the problem is we don't use it

00:48:48.500 yeah yeah because well yeah i mean i mean it was all bullshit right like i'm not i'm not saying

00:48:55.140 that it was it was fuck yeah yeah yeah like he was right we voted for president we voted for president

00:49:00.340 elects that have ran on ending the wars and then they never fucking do and it's like well you guys

00:49:05.860 are a bunch of fucking mate fucking bussies dude the funny the funniest part is that biden was the one

00:49:11.540 that did in one like i know i know trump like kind of set it up but biden was the one that did like

00:49:17.860 yeah i mean even that aside with trump though he had that like retard chad energy like super base

00:49:25.140 and like like even the war stuff aside like i don't like i was actually on a stream the other day

00:49:29.700 like and uh i was doing like talking about agorism and shit and actually because i'm you guys know

00:49:34.340 i'm not like really necessarily a fan of this route but someone like the guy i was with brought

00:49:38.180 up the point to kind of agree with me of like well look at dave smith he's gonna get up there and be

00:49:42.020 like oh they're gonna be like oh look this shit you said on uh legion skanks and i actually was like

00:49:46.500 nah actually no like i don't agree with that point like i i know the what we're talking about

00:49:50.980 here and you're kind of agreeing with me but no actually if he plays it cool like yeah that's what

00:49:54.660 i fucking said like honestly you get from people when you're like they're trying to be like hey

00:50:04.100 you're not supposed to do that and you're like fuck you and i don't care people respect that more

00:50:09.220 i honestly do that's one of the reasons besides you know like every election is a fucking scam anyways

00:50:15.620 but that's one of the reasons why trump fucking won it was like there was people that actually went

00:50:20.260 out there and fucking was like i don't care that he said i grabbed women by the pussy like yeah i said

00:50:25.060 worse than the fucking locker room and then it was like the whole conversation on locker room talk and

00:50:29.780 it's like dude like half y'all don't know shit from shit like you don't know what it's like living in

00:50:36.740 the real world and this is where i saw this fucking uh video the other day and it's like go around and

00:50:42.180 talk to any any random stranger and it'll prove to you that we're like in a simulation and everybody's

00:50:47.700 just a non-playable character and he walks into a business and he's like hey what's up and the guy's

00:50:52.740 like hey what's up what can i do for do for you and he's like oh i was just saying uh this weather's

00:50:57.220 crazy and the guy's like yep the weather's crazy day i heard there's a cold front coming in and he's

00:51:01.220 like all right cool man and then walks out of the store he's like that dude's not fucking real like

00:51:05.300 there's no way that's like that that's something you see in a fucking game and you know there's

00:51:10.980 people that are how that video showed it is like he goes back in with a gun and just

00:51:15.860 he's just like that dude's not fucking real

00:51:20.980 he's just saying that in court i swear he wasn't red dead

00:51:25.540 now he's on simulation none of this is real

00:51:30.740 doesn't matter none of your lives matter none of you are real

00:51:37.700 you know what was so dumb about that whole thing was like everyone who was pretending

00:51:43.540 to be shocked that trump would say that or that he would have even done that in his career it's

00:51:47.940 like no shit like this is donald dude he he gained like 20 points after that leaked playing the

00:51:54.180 military we're like oh that's what i do fucking the porn star like fucking the porn star another 20

00:51:59.860 points it's like oh yeah all the military members like he's just like me

00:52:12.020 can you guys imagine though like i mean while i don't necessarily agree with this route of like

00:52:16.660 going to lpmc shit or like politics in general but can you imagine how fucking delightfully glorious

00:52:21.700 it would be if one day fucking like dave smith does get on some major platform like cnn or some

00:52:26.820 and then be like and it says here that in 2017 you said the word nigger on the legion of skanks

00:52:34.020 podcast and he's gonna be like yes yes i did uh next question like can you imagine just like the

00:52:39.620 fucking uproar of that like the energy of everybody like oh my god

00:52:47.700 he's like yeah i called patrice o'neill a nigger what are you gonna do about it

00:52:50.980 i just do you want me to apologize no it was a joke so i don't what are you what are you gonna

00:52:57.700 say i literally love the guy but yes that's what he is what do you want me to tell you

00:53:03.380 i think people enjoy that energy like it's just like uh it's refreshing and that's kind

00:53:07.780 of one of the reasons why we did our show and i think that's probably why a lot of people

00:53:11.380 enjoy your guys's show is because it's like

00:53:13.540 like that's why i told marianne williamson to shut the fuck up everyone i know i know

00:53:18.900 people fucking enjoy that shit because it's like well at least somebody's saying what nobody else

00:53:23.860 is saying and it's right it's just but everybody that is not absolutely out of their mind wants to

00:53:29.380 say like no like everybody understand like i've every place that i've worked at everybody says like

00:53:35.780 i mean also i live in the deep south so maybe this is a little bit you learn how to work your mic

00:53:39.780 bud you could tell you've never had one i know i leave it like here like in this one place so and

00:53:46.420 i don't i need to rearrange my desk yeah i should go back to the phone

00:53:55.140 go on sorry but um it might be different because i live in the deep south but like everywhere i've

00:54:00.660 worked at they were all like no no they're all super chill they all like you know they all cuss

00:54:06.900 at work they all say like the the things you're not supposed to say but they all say it at fucking

00:54:12.100 work to me and they're just like yeah they're being really fucking gay or like yeah fuck the uh

00:54:18.020 fuck the county they're a bunch of bastards and retards right now or some shit like that like yeah

00:54:23.060 like and then you just go out in the world and they're just like you can't say that

00:54:27.060 and just like no one like everybody understands this isn't real like you can everybody says the things

00:54:33.940 that the whatever media or pc culture said you can't say everybody already said except for the

00:54:39.140 outside of the one any of you like if you ever had like i worked like kind of a corporate job for a

00:54:44.580 little bit and like kind of it was like more customer service and like obviously when people on the

00:54:49.620 phones are talking to someone like they have like this fake customer service like talk they do and then

00:54:56.260 right when they get off the phone they're like that dude was a fucking asshole okay like we're back to

00:55:01.940 normal like i don't know like or you off work hanging out with people like this is just how

00:55:06.180 normal people this is how poor people talk the scary thing though is there are people that that

00:55:10.500 voice that you're putting on is that's them like that's a scary concept to grasp with that like

00:55:16.180 there's nothing deeper than that they are just that fucking shallow fake thing

00:55:21.700 that's what they that's what that's the problem is like they want to turn everybody into that

00:55:25.780 and then people and then like most like normal people outside that aren't going to be

00:55:29.940 whatever this what was that whole thing the mass psychosis or whatever that one guy was talking

00:55:34.260 about formation psychosis yeah like all the people like because that's fucking real and that's what

00:55:39.300 they want to get to is like where everybody is formation psychosis is that people don't think

00:55:43.700 the word nigger is funny like it's just funny i don't know what to tell you like the fact that

00:55:47.780 you've been convinced otherwise is some sort of mass delusion i don't know what to tell you it's

00:55:51.380 fucking funny it's a funny word it makes people mad for no fucking reason guys guys you know why

00:55:56.180 do you know why black people are so tall because they're negroes

00:56:03.860 my favorite was always the uh why are black people's noses so big

00:56:08.340 because that's what god hung up by when he painted them black

00:56:13.140 some christian would like that

00:56:16.740 that was dude that was christian school jokes man

00:56:19.620 why do aspirins work because they're white black yeah

00:56:27.300 yeah my girlfriend's obsessed with this one she's like what do you call it four black dudes in a uh

00:56:31.940 in a uh what's it called a sleeping bag a kit kat she's obsessed with it she's puerto rican and

00:56:39.060 mexican she thinks it's the funniest thing in the world and i'm like what like why is that so funny to

00:56:45.060 you dude i don't know why but have you guys ever heard of non-jokes that's oh we're like oh yeah

00:56:51.300 anti-jokes or anti-jokes non-jokes all right like here would be one right now like uh okay um

00:56:56.980 what's worse than finding a worm in your apple finding two worms in your apple the holocaust

00:57:01.780 it's the same energy as like dead baby jokes like that's what it's also the same energy as the

00:57:12.820 guy that goes into the improv but always just does the worst thing it's just like he's in the

00:57:17.060 improv class they're like all right uh you're in the doctor's office um tell him why you're here

00:57:21.860 it's like i have aids that guy's the best what the fuck that's who fucking totus he's that guy improv

00:57:29.540 that goes like straight to 10 right off the bat for no reason do you want that phone on your

00:57:36.660 asshole and get shit on it i don't wait until like 32 man it's like he was like uh all right you're at

00:57:44.420 a store what's the first thing you see gang rape it's just funny man now no i i didn't want to ask

00:58:01.540 because we were talking about how trump is you know kind of this retarded chad or whatever and

00:58:05.300 that's why people like him they like this energy because he's he appears to be just one of the guys

00:58:10.020 or whatever what do you guys think big dick retard yeah but what do you guys think about like very

00:58:14.020 recently where he seems to be just alienating his base by being a vaccine faggot he's leaning on

00:58:19.300 the retard aspect yeah i don't think it's working out for him very well at all no no like i think a

00:58:27.620 lot of like i mean where i'm at is a small town community most people are trump supporters here

00:58:33.620 but also people are very against this vaccine shit like most people i work with are not vaccinated

00:58:39.300 like they're just not and they're kind of against it and then i don't know if they just kind of ignore

00:58:43.860 it but they're always kind of like i kind of ask people here and there like and like a lot of them

00:58:50.260 are like yeah i don't know why he's going so hard on this and i don't know i think it's fucking gay

00:58:55.700 but i i think with the trump thing i think he fucking played the retard chat energy super hard

00:59:02.820 and i think it was super cool but at the same time i think to some extent he kind of was like damn they

00:59:08.820 fucked me and so now he i think he may be trying to play the game a little bit and is like but i do

00:59:14.340 think there's a good chance the more he gets fucked with back by his people he's like well okay it's

00:59:18.660 retard chat energy or nothing so he's either gonna like back out even in culture or go full

00:59:25.460 the whole reason he sucked is because he kind of cucked to whatever they want like yes you're

00:59:31.700 finding out like he's actually not very pro-israel at all like you're seeing what he thinks of bb and

00:59:37.300 everything and like it's like well when you were in there you cuck to them and then like the same

00:59:41.700 with like well they they're always dropping these bombs you know like you obviously was against

00:59:46.900 staying in syria he was against staying in afghanistan personally but he never fucking

00:59:51.300 did anything about it yeah he understands that like low interest rates are not good that they

00:59:56.820 cause bubbles but then when he was president he just like you know even for him to hire powell

01:00:02.740 because he wasn't raising so everything that sucks about him he's because he did what they want so

01:00:07.540 like if he wants to make some sort of rebound he's got to go full retard chat that's the only way

01:00:13.620 yeah he always came off as like this fucking chad dude in public but then you would see him like

01:00:21.220 oh he just hired john bolton and you're like what is going on and then he'd go on go on in the news

01:00:28.820 and say something completely wild and you're like oh that's the guy i like and then he'd go and

01:00:33.300 hire mike pompeo and you're like what the fuck is going on now what i think he's actually doing is i

01:00:39.060 think maybe he thinks he's running again in 2024 and he thinks he's like going after like who the

01:00:45.300 republican contenders are which is why he's like hey ron de santis yeah you're not uh you're not

01:00:51.300 vaccinated what's wrong with you yeah handsome version of me yeah he's going the wrong way though

01:00:58.340 cameron kind of has it he said so true he's like a jack murphy level cut because that's basically what

01:01:02.580 it is like he's he presents like i'm a chad but then in the back rooms like he's a fucking yes

01:01:09.780 like he's literally just like i like other dudes rail me i'm a cuck like but i'm gonna tell show

01:01:15.300 everybody like up front i'm gonna look like a chad and sound like a chad and then like until until

01:01:22.260 israel gets in the room and then and then israel fucks me or you know whoever they want i do want to

01:01:28.100 bring up garbage man i've been telling you guys for a while i want to start doing right after the

01:01:31.540 intro different bits every week of garbage man reading tweets from our haters because he

01:01:36.580 someone who was in here earlier uia he did a whole bit in the group chat a while back of like him

01:01:41.300 reading them uh and just it was just funny him reading them out of context but he would wear like

01:01:45.540 little dinosaur jammies and like be holding a cute little plush toy and read them off i think that'd be

01:01:50.420 a great bit for the beginning of every show let us know if you agree guys i gotta run because i

01:01:56.180 gotta eat before the truck stop like shuts the restaurant down so nice meeting you guys thanks for having

01:02:01.060 yeah you too man yeah are you gonna plug reed you want to plug well i even said thanks for having

01:02:07.220 me on because i'm like a guest yeah that's true yeah all right reed underscore coverdale on twitter

01:02:14.340 naturalist capitalists on all the podcast feeds uh and i'll have addy ads on the show tomorrow night

01:02:21.060 talking about the galane maxwell trial because he was there in person the whole time so tune in for that

01:02:25.780 wow fuck yeah nice thanks guys see you bud all right see you man would y'all fuck jizz lane

01:02:31.540 oh my god yeah 100 dude i saw her bikini and i was like god damn dude what's going on well the

01:02:37.860 problem is though does that like transitive thing work where if you fuck somebody you

01:02:41.300 fuck all of their previous partners because then you'd be a pedophile whatever i'm okay

01:02:46.020 well that's fine yeah i'm down i couldn't yeah you know what can you bring the young girls too i'd

01:02:54.180 fuck them too i don't i don't deep that i don't think that deeply about fucking i just put my dick in

01:02:58.820 holes guys i hate this fucking i hate this double standard like fucking girls will fuck like a hundred

01:03:05.860 dudes and they'll call them sluts and then i do it and they call me gay

01:03:12.020 that's pretty good

01:03:15.140 but would you fuck jeffrey epstein though i i'd do my dick probably i'd probably

01:03:19.540 only first he's a handsome older fella i'll give him that he is very i bet i bet he smelled amazing

01:03:26.420 i bet dude like yeah he does look like someone that's like really nice cologne really takes care

01:03:31.780 of his you know well uh babies do smell really good so he's not rubbing babies on himself

01:03:38.980 it would be really funny though like his his dick smells like babies

01:03:53.380 he has a retardedly big head though like and you'd think like you always see him on camera or video and

01:03:58.580 it's like you'd think his head looks smaller because i mean reed you like a reed he has a

01:04:02.340 gigantic fucking head but it doesn't look as bad on camera and because they say like people with big

01:04:06.500 heads it actually like works out well but if your head actually looks big on camera that thing has

01:04:10.660 got to be retardedly large like an actual person like a goddamn bubble head you know but do you guys

01:04:16.180 think that jeff and jislaine were in love no i mean they were in a lot of things i don't know if love

01:04:24.820 with one of them i think they no i think they were really in love i think that i think they're

01:04:30.500 love i think there's like no balance that you need to uh look like you're in love

01:04:38.180 right or or whatever massage or whatever the fuck they were part of i'm trying to remember a

01:04:43.620 fucking tweet i did about this a while ago that like it was basically saying that maybe jeff was

01:04:47.460 actually a good guy and he just fell into the trap of women

01:04:49.860 he was just like dude she's so fucking hot she keeps sucking my dick i mean she's bringing babies

01:04:56.980 in here and fucking killing them but dude she keeps sucking my dick and i she's so nice

01:05:07.380 yeah she sold all those young girls to bill clinton but god he's seen he's like i didn't know how old

01:05:15.220 they were i look the other way she kept sucking my dick that's that's oh man i don't ask questions

01:05:23.220 that's true do your thing honey whatever

01:05:27.220 bam i would traffic children it's like it's like jeffrey you had to know how old they were like

01:05:32.180 you asked one when they were grumpy if they were on their period and they asked what is that it's like

01:05:36.660 you should know that they're too young when they don't know what their own period is

01:05:44.660 holy shit what the fuck i love garbage man's deranged weird mind

01:05:51.060 all of them like all of them is the number dude she would she totally had to do like the craziest

01:05:56.900 weirdest shit because there's no way he let her get away with all that well once you get to

01:06:00.820 the fucking kids there's like i cannot buy a man is this evil women are evil creatures like this

01:06:07.220 they will do this kind of shit but just string you along keep sucking your dick and you're just like

01:06:10.580 well you know i don't want this dick sucking train to stop so i'm gonna keep going along with it

01:06:16.180 it's all just it's fault dude jeff was a good guy

01:06:21.460 you know what i gotta grab a beer with jeff you know what

01:06:26.100 talk sense into him like dude like what are you doing like man she's taking down a real weird

01:06:30.580 dark road she keeps sucking my dick so good

01:06:36.340 and she's so nice to me if jeffrey epstein had a real friend a real guy friend they all this could

01:06:42.660 have been stopped he's just he's the golden retriever friend he's just like uh i get pets

01:06:51.940 you're my best friend she calls me a good boy and that's about it no one ever taught jeff bros

01:06:57.300 before pose man no one ever taught him well it's like i just do what she says uh she sucks my dick

01:07:04.500 she's nice to me and i go to sleep and wake up and do it again like i don't know what you want for

01:07:08.420 me it's like i have a lot of money it's like yeah it was like she she sucks my dick and like all this

01:07:14.340 money keeps coming in my bank account so i i don't know what to do guys like i i understand you're

01:07:20.260 saying she's bad for me but like what do you want to be past this do you like going to the private

01:07:26.420 island i want to keep the island

01:07:36.660 oh we're like an hour ten we probably ought to move into our duck uh segment what is this

01:07:43.060 is so this is a a special uh version of this i think we've played this once or twice now and

01:07:51.060 really i just show pictures of certain people and you basically deem them the fuckable or not

01:07:57.300 okay yeah and then from there i mean obviously take be as elaborate with you want with it we're

01:08:01.860 having fun here you know go to town so what we're gonna do is we just did a we just did a

01:08:06.740 10 minute bit on how jeffrey epstein's a great guy so now we're gonna roll into he's a lp uh

01:08:15.860 i genuinely could buy that narrative if someone sold it to me like that is believable as a dude we

01:08:21.460 do not ask for much just be nice to us routinely fuck us and like well we'll just kind of mostly

01:08:26.980 retardedly go okay that jeff like jeffrey like he was just a normal dude and then jeslane was the cia

01:08:34.580 handler that pulled him into like the the dark ops or whatever i think that's obvious why do you

01:08:40.980 think she's alive and he's dead right yeah yeah it's like she's she's the handler and then he was

01:08:46.020 just you know some guy she's the mastermind man yeah really like what you don't realize behind

01:08:51.060 the scenes she's like all right jeffrey you're gonna go talk to netanyahu this is what you need

01:08:55.220 to say don't go off script just say this uh if there's any questions be like i'll get back to you

01:09:00.180 this is all you gotta say and then come back and i'll suck your dick and we'll have dinner and you

01:09:04.740 know watch a movie and go to sleep and i'll love you forever and you're like okay also you get 10

01:09:09.700 billion dollars and i ordered some furniture off of wayfair just

01:09:17.620 if you hear screams coming from the uh the new the new cabinets don't worry about it it's just

01:09:23.700 it's just a ghost it's a ghost of a little child yeah um so we're gonna make fun of some pictures

01:09:32.180 of some people here now this is uh an lp massachusetts special because me being in

01:09:37.700 massachusetts we just had the lp establishment the lp massachusetts establishment and some national

01:09:44.180 people decided that what they were going to do is violate their own bylaws have a secret meeting

01:09:49.540 throw out all of the mises caucus people who had signed a petition to have like a special

01:09:54.340 committee to elect delegates for reno knock a lie this was a real attack on democracy yeah

01:10:00.260 not to lie this would be super based if they all weren't so gay

01:10:05.940 are actually sounds like politics so i can't remember who i was listening to or who had the tweet

01:10:11.460 no i think it was uh one of the libertarian friendship simulator guys but they were just like

01:10:17.140 like how how gay i mean how gay are you if you were kicked out of the lp

01:10:25.540 you must be a major faggot

01:10:32.260 i thought that was hilarious you're such a faggot that the faggots don't even want

01:10:36.740 yeah the faggots are just like jesus man you're gay dude do you guys think that jbh got less gay when

01:10:44.260 he resigned oh that's no i mean god i mean can he get less gay than going home to another man i

01:10:52.180 mean just wait is he gay oh joe bishop hitchman is literally married to a man oh yeah he's

01:11:00.100 he's a straight up god he's the vice chair of the lp party or the chair of the lp party

01:11:05.220 yeah dude is a straight up faggot like he's a real and i'm not saying that's a bad thing but it's

01:11:12.020 kind of like dude you're feeling a real hard stereotype right here dude you can on the lp

01:11:17.220 meetings on all the like the streams and stuff you could see dried up cum on his lip like

01:11:23.620 i'm not saying it's bad to be gay and be the the chair of the lp i'm saying

01:11:28.740 it's it's about the same as being a black dude being the manager at popeyes

01:11:32.500 that's basically what i'm saying it makes sense let's let's just say it's not a stereotype if it's

01:11:38.660 always true okay guys do you know the one statue that blm is not going to take down

01:11:46.740 colonel sanders

01:11:51.540 oh my god all right let's uh let's get into this uh fucker doc here so i got i think six people in

01:12:00.100 here first up is um i don't know what this guy's actual position is oh god he's he has some

01:12:06.580 it would definitely be bottom how about that i believe his name is andrew moore uh okay so we're

01:12:14.660 imagining it for a femaleness scenario because i mean no i mean he's not that feminine i mean okay

01:12:20.420 i will imagine you're 10 years deep into a life sentence at jail uh i would totally

01:12:26.340 fuck him he looks very easy in that scenario yeah i say 12 shots and yeah 12 shots yes

01:12:35.540 well here's the thing going for him for me at least uh one skinhead

01:12:43.780 that's got me going um he's got he's definitely has the slender frame so i mean

01:12:50.660 me already being like a smaller guy being able to take advantage of him you're a smaller guy

01:12:56.740 yeah all right don't put yourself down he's like probably you're i'd say you're five seven

01:13:02.580 i'm five and but you're thick no you're oh we're talking about height um yeah i'm five eight and i'm

01:13:08.020 like i mean by the way i'm five five i'm not talking about you being a short little

01:13:11.700 bitch but like you know yeah you're you're shorter i'm shorter on my back

01:13:20.020 my dick is hard this guy obviously i mean he's slender and he dresses well so he's obviously gay

01:13:27.060 so i don't know what that factor is yeah i mean it looks like he has soft lips this guy looks like he

01:13:33.140 has a a waifu pillow at his house that he fucks everyone like that 100 percent i'm gonna say duck

01:13:41.860 oh so you're you wouldn't fuck him so no i mean to be fair my suck uh is only in a 10 year my

01:13:49.380 situational 10 year into prison and i'm in a life sentence so i'm already i'm good

01:13:55.940 i don't know man even even with the skinhead even with the slender frame i'm still got to go duck here

01:14:01.140 it's just it's not enough i mean he doesn't he's very much a school shooter type though i'll give

01:14:05.380 him that oh oh yeah he looks like a shitty agent in uh the matrix like

01:14:12.180 he looks like before well if you're in a player creator the like the original create like whenever

01:14:17.460 you just get in and they're just like generic guy and like that's that

01:14:22.820 he kind of reminds me of uh like steve carell in that spy movie that he did the comedy spy movie

01:14:27.860 that he did oh way less cool and oh uh get smart you mean yes yeah which is based off a tv show yes

01:14:37.700 but that's probably also the best picture of him that's actually a pretty good picture oh dude i

01:14:41.060 want to see the worst one that's more fun what the fuck well yeah he has to be the best of him

01:14:45.060 maybe he doesn't look let's let's just say let's just say some of these people are so unknown that you

01:14:49.700 can only find one picture of them i don't care all right well i'm going duck oh it would be really bad

01:14:56.420 someone said he looks 16 that would be really bad if he was actually under age wait 16

01:15:01.220 fuck fuck fuck oh so so it's fuck or a duck or suck my dick all right there's there's two scenarios

01:15:07.940 here one he is above age and then there's one that he's a minor and we it's either fuck or duck on

01:15:13.700 each one so it's a does it come with some furniture though because if i doesn't i don't want it

01:15:18.980 yes you get to fuck him on that park bench right there oh god no i'm ducking i'm all yeah i'm

01:15:26.980 ducking i'm still going duck and it's because i don't find submissives to be attractive

01:15:31.220 oh god that's you want to do that fucks you

01:15:34.820 there was so much there was so much in that sentence that was

01:15:40.900 dude hard duck under any scenario

01:15:49.220 i don't i don't think after 12 shots i could do this dude why does he why does he look like the uh

01:15:54.420 the class actually fucks ducks like i don't even know how to make fun of him just look at him

01:16:00.740 how are you bald and have long hair at the same time

01:16:05.220 why is he so goddamn jewish like

01:16:09.140 to me he looks like he looks like he's uh a guy who was in like a 60s like classic rock band or

01:16:14.820 something and now he's way older and doesn't want to give into the fact that he can't grow hair

01:16:19.140 anymore he literally looks like worse than a holocaust victim

01:16:24.660 he doesn't look like the jewish mean guy he actually looks like yeah the jewish mean guy

01:16:29.140 that's like fucking you know doing that and has this guy in the beard yeah is this guy important

01:16:33.940 in the massachusetts lp he's i mean you already said it by massachusetts

01:16:41.220 you said lp in massachusetts are any of those things recommending you to think that anybody just

01:16:46.580 didn't i don't know dude this is insane i've never seen him i've never seen someone ugly in my

01:16:52.100 life feel free to hop in boo thing that's what ruckus said he looks like a meatloaf

01:16:59.860 he looks like those like funny glasses that you get you know the the big thick rim glasses with the

01:17:05.380 beard and the big nose wait wait he looks like meatloaf the man or the food the man oh don't ever

01:17:12.900 say that about me feel free to hop in top lobster you have the link by the way yeah dude i'd love to

01:17:18.580 meet top oh he does look like freak show from harold kumar that's yeah top get in here if you took

01:17:24.260 off yeah all the um the boils and shit from like freak show he would look just like that jesus christ

01:17:30.900 this is what the lp attracts like how the like why are they not winning that's what i've been telling

01:17:36.500 you guys get out of the lp i had this conversation with my girlfriend the other day and i was like

01:17:44.100 she's not very political she kind of agrees with like the that i have to say she's gotten a lot more

01:17:48.980 to my side she went on a giant rant about taxes the other day and i was like we're going in the right

01:17:53.620 direction and uh how hard yeah pretty hard yeah but she was she was just like but there's some

01:18:06.900 weird motherfuckers i could never associate with any of those people and i was like i don't blame

01:18:11.460 you i was like especially an attractive woman like i wouldn't i wouldn't be able to be in a

01:18:17.220 and that's not like weird they're not like into you know she's not into like dressing up as an

01:18:22.820 anime character and like flaunting it all over the fucking place on twitter or she's not

01:18:28.900 i don't i don't care that people do that shit but there's a certain type of person that like

01:18:36.500 is attracted to this to doing this specific stuff and they're they're not gonna get normal people

01:18:44.260 that are like living a normal job yeah i would say i'm not into that but my tick tock would say

01:18:48.900 different so i think everybody's tick tock i think that's the default on tick tock it's just

01:18:53.860 the algorithm you literally can't get away from it it's just like you want anime dude i don't even

01:18:58.340 follow it it just keeps popping up and i'm like well i don't hate this

01:19:03.860 this guy this guy looks like he tried to be in a band and it totally fails then he wound up having to

01:19:08.580 resort to being in the libertarian party yeah like 30 years ago he fell to be in the power

01:19:14.100 and then stop watching top and get back to drawing our shit

01:19:19.540 and like yeah this guy's forehead looks like it has its own government so

01:19:24.260 it's definitely in its own

01:19:25.540 that's his nose it looks like it has its own government yeah jesus christ

01:19:33.460 it covers yeah i mean i was more likely to fuck the other guy yeah that's true like is there any

01:19:40.100 we should have we should have done a rating how many years in jail would you have military jail

01:19:45.380 dude i would not before oh military jail 20 years 20 years i wouldn't fuck him

01:19:56.260 he's the guy that uh you know has an accident out on the yard pretty quickly

01:20:03.140 i i the only way i could even imagine a scenario is a life sentence and for some reason the only

01:20:08.260 person i have any interaction at all was him that's the only way the only way i have no chance

01:20:12.740 of parole no nothing this guy this guy you would just assume he's a pedophile without even knowing

01:20:17.860 what his sentence was like you'd be like what are you in here for and he's like tax evasion you're

01:20:22.980 like okay okay yeah yeah i'm not only ducking him i'm gonna just immediately take out a restraining

01:20:27.860 order on him even then in my scenario the only reason i'd fuck him is because i'd be worried he'd

01:20:32.260 try to fuck me first and i just want to i want to show dominant behavior before exactly

01:20:38.340 oh my god i love you dicky next up uh we have uh this uh woman who has like blocked myself i

01:20:48.820 honestly came into this thinking i was going to fuck more men than women in this whole scenario but

01:20:55.700 uh she proved it right she's definitely end of the night material i don't have to have a crazy

01:21:01.060 scenario but end of the night the club the bar and i haven't gotten lucky anywhere else i'm like well

01:21:06.660 i gotta get my nut off somewhere that's a solid good one that's not even a bad one like i've done

01:21:11.140 i'm pretty sure typos fucked this girl's daughter before i hate this this woman this

01:21:17.140 was the same uh tara de sisto which is interesting she assists all over her face yeah i was gonna say

01:21:22.180 if i i she's almost gonna turn me into a duck well this is almost like i could not not look

01:21:27.940 yeah i couldn't look i mean staring at the moles i don't even have to really be that drunk but

01:21:32.500 it's just a matter of like well i'm not getting laid so this is like passable i guess so okay

01:21:37.460 you're kind of just like i'm in carlsbad i'm in carlsbad i'm like a lot of shots deep and this is my

01:21:43.860 last resort you're in the carlsbad caverns probably yeah probably she's the troll that comes out in the

01:21:52.180 cave somewhere yeah i mean this is me like leaving the bar and i'm like fuck i didn't get a chick and

01:21:57.860 she starts like limping up and i'm like all right let's see what's going on here she has a

01:22:02.420 gimpy leg that's definitely the one that chats you up like you don't even have to really put

01:22:07.460 much yes yes well she's the she's the girl at the bar like that is the friend of the friend of like

01:22:13.940 the the best looking girl at the bar that's her like yeah she's just like and like but she's the

01:22:18.500 one that's very like trying to be on all the guys and yeah she didn't get too drunk that way she

01:22:24.500 could still nail and get some cock at the end of the night you know yeah she was i'm gonna do it

01:22:29.860 yeah yeah she's only drinking light beer on your hot she was zoomed in on your hot friend that's

01:22:34.660 way too fucked up that she might actually have a chance oh that's true oh that's true yeah i

01:22:39.140 wouldn't fuck her because she'd just be going after my buddy who is like like he's 12 shots in

01:22:43.940 she's basically gonna rape him and all she's whispered in his night all she's whispered in his

01:22:51.220 ear the whole night is like i give good head yes well he's like oh i like it i like it i mean

01:22:59.140 if you look the way that she does you better and i'm just like hey jeffrey calm down man okay jesus

01:23:03.300 dude you better be bringing something something to the table besides having a position in the lp

01:23:10.260 national or whatever the hell she is that would be really funny she led with that i'm i'm in the lp

01:23:15.220 massachusetts like fuck out like yeah i'm gonna say eventually i'd fuck yeah

01:23:25.380 i'm gonna go duck because i can't i can't stand moles like on on face like it just couldn't i

01:23:29.940 like i see him as targets

01:23:33.700 it's okay with body moles though he's okay with me yeah body moles are okay like it's me but like face

01:23:39.300 moles you're telling me if i if i kissed her like that thing is way too close to me to my to my mouth

01:23:46.340 you'd probably feel it dude but i think yeah you feel the hairs off of it at least i can't tell you

01:23:51.380 how much i hope and pray in the god i don't believe in that fucking someone comes at us for something

01:23:58.500 like oh my god they spent 15 minutes denigrating a woman and imagining scenarios in which they'd

01:24:04.180 fuck them and blah blah yeah well they should be happy we're giving them attention i don't

01:24:09.620 understand like it's like a bitch one said they were gonna fuck you like i don't understand like

01:24:15.300 you won here this is really bad though because if you uh a former marine

01:24:23.300 that's not impressive bro it's more impressive than lp massachusetts i'll tell you that oh my god if

01:24:29.700 you kiss this woman by the way you might just get cancer it might uh be contagious you'll get

01:24:35.620 white woman that's about what you get does liz have any cooter moles no

01:24:48.820 all right next up we have uh oh my god a woman in the dog i do really good quick i say i really

01:24:56.100 hope that like liz has like a mole a big mole on her cooter and like cole just refuses to eat her

01:25:01.780 out because i'm not gonna get near that just oh my god it's true no oh my god this woman is uh

01:25:12.260 chris crawford i believe and i think she's the treasurer i want to save the l the lpma i don't

01:25:18.180 even know but she's she looks like the grandma that stormed the capital

01:25:21.540 action she actually does and for that reason i'm saying fuck

01:25:34.260 she she is also uh an insane cat lady which i think you can tell by this photo there's a

01:25:40.260 fucking dog there toad yeah but it's a little dog so it's a cat it looks like she's saying my

01:25:47.860 precious my precious but imagine like you get done banging her and like you can you don't have to pull

01:25:55.140 out she's way past her prime and then she will bake you cookies like this is the perfect she will

01:26:02.900 literally like she has cookies she has milk she has some worthless originals and you get to just like

01:26:08.740 chill eat cookies and watch some fucking um um whatever it is like do that watermelon in the

01:26:14.660 background though oh no what the fuck dude it's depraved only fucks black guys actually so we're all

01:26:19.700 out of luck as i am i felt bad about this at first but you sold me coal i'd fuck the shit out of her

01:26:30.180 i'm gonna say fuck it as well because she's so loose that you would never actually be

01:26:34.260 fucking her like you're never actually but she's actually i don't know i'm gonna say you'll feel

01:26:42.980 it i'm gonna go with out of all the people if i had to choose between the four people that we've

01:26:48.100 done so far i'm fucking the first guy and then just to submit them just like i do it for it's not even

01:26:57.300 it's not even about pleasure i'm literally just want to dominate something not even gay it's not gay

01:27:02.340 when it's only to show him who's boss

01:27:07.940 and i'm gonna make him kiss me on the mouth and he's gonna like it

01:27:11.060 you're gonna like it

01:27:16.340 kiss me in the mouth you're gonna love me by this and i'll never call you back

01:27:21.060 no i'm gonna say duck because i just feel like the conversation afterwards is gonna be very boring

01:27:27.060 like i just i mean i'm gonna say i don't need the dog lick of my butthole while i'm trying to

01:27:32.660 fuck around well that would that would push me more toward fuck yeah oh my god all right quick story

01:27:41.220 way back when when me and my wife like first got together i've been married for like a decade but

01:27:45.140 like when we first got together i remember there's one time we were at our apartment and we were

01:27:49.380 fucking like hard on like a chair and like i live my like my balls started feeling amazing and they're

01:27:55.700 all like wet but i assumed it was like not to get too crude for this show but i thought it was like

01:27:59.540 the pussy juices just flowing you know and like i thought she had her hand back they're kind of

01:28:03.460 rubbing them oh baby and then come to find out her dog was licking my balls

01:28:22.580 well it's like that deadpool uh moment when he was just like whenever he would he was like no don't

01:28:27.060 do that you totally do it you should not like you're killing the dog like stop keep going please

01:28:34.340 stop looking my balls looking more like i'm not gonna lie that was probably the greatest feeling

01:28:40.100 of my life but it was so wrong i had to stop it but he does it all the time now he puts peanut butter

01:28:45.460 on his balls and i was like i don't know why he felt so bad because you know your wife was letting

01:28:49.620 him do it all the time oh my god so jose fucks dogs that's what we found out sort of hey my dogs

01:29:01.220 looked my ass all during the sex before didn't stop it oh my god uh next up we have uh the guy on the

01:29:10.660 on the on our right here uh we he looked the same to me i can't tell the difference

01:29:17.060 they're both black they're both wearing masks i don't know uh this guy we call woke jeremy

01:29:23.620 because they're which one on the right or the left the one on our right so the one

01:29:28.100 the one with the cross or the one not with the cross the one not with the cross okay thank you

01:29:33.220 he looks like a generic he looks like a generic fucking contrived news story

01:29:39.860 the one the one not giving the black powder

01:29:42.020 symbol he actually looks like a buddy of mine yeah that i uh knew from from college but i mean

01:29:48.980 that guy's just black they don't look the same cool yeah that's it i was like it's like if you

01:29:53.940 know you feel really bad if you ever if uh if you ever go to a black guy you're like hey you look

01:29:58.340 like my friend this is like yeah dude i you got a black friend i'm sure i do i'm sure i do

01:30:04.020 you look like a white friend

01:30:12.820 and you look like the rest of the city that tries to kill me on a day yeah what's his name uh markel

01:30:22.580 he just looks like i imagine there's gonna be one side of the story saying oh my god he was such a

01:30:26.740 gentle giant he brought my groceries in one time the other side is gonna be like yeah he raped a

01:30:31.620 bitch decapitated some woman and fucking shot up a grocery store and you got and but you know

01:30:38.420 the the cops killed them and somehow they fucked up so holy shit i so here's the problem like

01:30:45.860 i'm not gonna be able to fuck that guy like i'm not big enough i'm not you yeah he's gonna

01:30:52.580 fuck me if i'm gonna go fuck so i have to but here's the thing if i say duck is that me being

01:30:58.820 a pussy and just all i like just showing how much more he would fuck me yeah that you you're

01:31:04.580 incapable of dominating yeah i have i have to go fuck here i have to say if i'm in prison right

01:31:10.580 now if you say fuck nobody believes you so yeah that's true i will say situationally if i'm in prison

01:31:17.220 and he's like in my room and i know he's interested like i'm gonna begrudgingly fuck him because it's

01:31:22.260 like i can't be having that fuck me regularly i'm gonna have to try to like it's one of those

01:31:26.980 like do or die things because i'm either gonna be taking that dick for the rest of my life or i'm

01:31:30.900 gonna have to fucking like man up and be like all right let's take this fucking mountain you know

01:31:34.420 that's right the sad part is we're probably going to be in prison before him so

01:31:40.500 as you see right here he's catering to the establishment quite a bit right here

01:31:44.180 yeah that's why i said it exactly that's catholic not jew all right

01:31:50.660 now yeah and i believe uh fucker duck is prison rules by the way so you do need to take the

01:31:55.300 largest uh person and make them your bitch so i'd have to fuck him just for survival reasons

01:32:00.660 yeah like in a prison situation yeah and it's not like i'd enjoy it it's just like i'm not getting

01:32:06.340 that giant dick in my ass by the way i know he has a mask on but he might be the best looking

01:32:11.060 person out of the people we've seen so far yeah he's not handsome they are better he's not a bad

01:32:17.060 looking dude i guess it's a handsome guy attractive guy yeah yeah the reason why we hate on black people

01:32:22.660 so much because they're so much better at us than anything other than intellectual pursuits so you

01:32:26.740 know we're a little jealous it's almost like that i shared that daniel todd video hey they speak for

01:32:30.900 yourself well i shared that daniel todd video he was just like where he goes like now i'm gonna preface

01:32:36.820 this was slavery was terrible it was totally bad we should have never done it but don't you just

01:32:41.860 like go like damn we really pulled that off there's so much and i said slavery was wrong it's bad but

01:32:51.140 like you know at any moment they could have beat the shit out of us there's so more athletic that was

01:32:58.900 quite an achievement we pulled off if you think about it sorry i was taking a piss are we talking about the

01:33:04.340 priest or no the other guy the non-priest oh i was gonna say the priest i'd be okay with molesting

01:33:11.380 my children but because he you get the inward pass if he molests your children

01:33:18.660 just coming with bangers today buck or guck

01:33:24.900 so i i guess we're all gonna say fuck because i mean if not he would just well in prison rules

01:33:30.180 like i can't imagine another scenario it's just a matter of like if it's fuck or be

01:33:34.820 fucked i'm fucking and like i get it he might he probably is gonna thrash me i'm probably gonna

01:33:39.620 end up getting fucked anyways it's a big dude oh yeah he's ripping you know

01:33:43.860 he's just

01:33:44.580 no

01:33:51.220 oh

01:33:51.620 yeah i love yeah i'm gonna say fuck is the best looking one he is like i said he's the best

01:33:57.140 looking guy out of all i mean if i'm doing it off the looks i'm voting for him yeah

01:34:02.420 unless toad has a banger in the last one here uh that's right and this guy by the way is the chair

01:34:07.060 of the lp boston by the way but like everything intellectual the jews

01:34:11.460 fucking rule and everything physical blacks rule even appearance they're they're handsome

01:34:14.820 motherfuckers i'll say that god they are dude yeah white people just kind of suck at everything

01:34:19.940 except talking shit and we had slavery one time

01:34:27.140 we're just better on top though we're like when we get on top we're just the best at that like

01:34:32.660 we're we're like if you if you have like a role-playing game and you and you you deal out

01:34:36.900 skills or whatever we're like neutral across the board so we're good at like ruling everything because

01:34:41.620 we're like relatively good at everything but we don't have anything dominated like the jews

01:34:45.780 have intelligence dominated all that shit blacks have like all the physical attributes you know

01:34:49.940 like agents like magic or whatever basically you're just saying that black people are like

01:34:54.820 recharge strength the jews are just fucking like all reigns do not create that abomination they'll rule

01:35:02.100 control the world

01:35:06.500 and slaver would have been easier if it was on like an island or something because they wouldn't have

01:35:16.740 been able to get away

01:35:19.700 then they would have fought back

01:35:20.980 what do you what do you what do you what do you think a con what do you think a con is toad

01:35:25.460 oh

01:35:25.860 next and uh last which also by the way real quick all right yes this wasn't a super chat but it's so

01:35:34.740 good i had to bring it up that's pretty good actually

01:35:40.580 they're fucking right those crazy fucking black people in the the corner are yelling about being jews

01:35:44.740 like they're right israelites man they're preaching the truth brother humanity's final form and now

01:35:51.140 as i said you know in fucker duck you do need to take the largest person and make them your

01:35:55.940 bitch probably finally i knew it i knew it i knew what's going we have i will say that will give you

01:36:02.500 that thing that creature will give you the best bj of your life but is it worth it

01:36:06.180 we have the former uh now former chair of the massachusetts lp because she stepped down after

01:36:13.780 kicking all those people out knowing that it was illegal or you know against their bylaws didn't she

01:36:19.860 get some weird sexual harassment claims about like making some dude take his shirt off yeah it was like

01:36:25.620 it was that henry connelly guy okay because i want to say like i can not imagine a scenario in which

01:36:30.900 it's okay for someone to be like take your shirt off sexy boy but and i'm actually someone who's

01:36:35.380 super confident stuff like i like i will take compliments from women gays trannies whatever i

01:36:42.180 i like that ship if you're like take your shirt off you sexy man meat i'll be like all right this is

01:36:47.380 this is weird and too far like i don't like this anymore i was flattered and now you've taken it too

01:36:54.100 far i feel like she could give the bj that can make you look past child fucking

01:36:59.380 she doesn't have the appearance to close the deal

01:37:04.260 keeping in mind that uh she was born a man so i don't know if she still has a penis or not but

01:37:13.140 you want to be able to tell that thing has not gotten rid of its penis okay you want to be able

01:37:17.140 to tell because of all the fat rolls so i don't i don't know if you're really not there's a whole lot

01:37:21.940 of testosterone going on there i think there's no balls there's a snowball chance in hell that i'm

01:37:27.700 putting my dick anywhere close to that fucking abomination of a human being i'm talking i'm

01:37:35.460 if i had to choose off of looks um fucking woke jeremy but he'd probably wreck me dude i'm i'm

01:37:41.300 definitely going ducking but still is like the best pga of your life but i just can't i couldn't ever

01:37:46.340 look at myself in the mirror again i'd rather we're duck all the other ones or them fuck me

01:37:51.940 before i touch that thing like that's basically how i feel about this and by the way you notice that uh

01:37:57.300 pride flag mask or whatever it is right there uh is about to like burst off of her face oh yeah

01:38:03.220 that's like a super progressive one too that's gotten even weird and crazy with all the different

01:38:08.020 designs and other you know weird shit in it you know please pull your mask down over your 20 chins

01:38:13.780 from my experience the larger ones are better at blowjobs but it's a dude which makes it means

01:38:25.300 they have first-hand experience can they swallow i don't know in my history i can say they're all

01:38:30.020 girls like you cannot tell me that if you yourself were like i'm gonna go gay right now i love dick

01:38:37.940 that you wouldn't be like i probably could suck dick like crazy like me i was like you know what a

01:38:43.300 dude likes like you know what works like you are in touch as anyone could possibly with that member

01:38:49.460 i actually say all the time i wish i was gay it would make my life so much easier it would make

01:38:53.860 it so much easier oh yeah if i could just fuck dudes all the time and just hang out i mean like

01:39:01.380 literally fuck a guy and then be like hey you want to play some madden dude if i was a fag i would talk

01:39:06.260 shit on women non-stop but because i had to end up with one i kind of hold back yeah ten percent

01:39:12.980 yeah if you're gay you're like what are you gonna do not fuck me oh

01:39:19.540 it's literally the you have no power here like from the lord of the right

01:39:23.140 yes yes telling a woman you are obsolete to everything in my life

01:39:28.260 i was gay and i had that pass you thought milo was bad

01:39:36.420 everybody's ducking here right well i mean if we're doing prison rules you gotta because there's

01:39:40.900 no way i'm letting that fuck me so that one would be more dominant than the black one i feel like yeah

01:39:46.500 yeah i think she's she's bigger for sure like oh prison jesus well i mean that's hard too but

01:39:54.500 like i don't want to get fucked she would be in the women's prison so she wouldn't even be

01:39:58.100 yeah 12 12 hand sanitizer shots in

01:40:08.100 yeah in prison

01:40:10.820 but i'm gonna say duck now i'm good

01:40:13.220 duck get this get that thing off my fucking screen jesus christ

01:40:18.660 there you go

01:40:20.500 and that's what we're gonna i guess end it on too because we're

01:40:22.580 fucking hour and 40 into this

01:40:25.460 yeah we already got reported by uia

01:40:27.220 yeah we're gonna report it so make sure you check us out on odyssey

01:40:33.700 odyssey is fully cool with gay bashing and stuff so

01:40:36.580 luke typo drop your shit so uh let work people

01:40:42.820 uh yeah you can find me at keep it real luke on twitter and keep it real luke on instagram you

01:40:47.940 can also find me or you can find our show on every major platform it's uh called biting the bullet

01:40:54.740 um it's on instagram that's where all of our fucking memes are that's where most of our

01:40:58.500 are fucking memes too yeah at biting the bullet podcast now or is it just pod now it's biting

01:41:06.580 bullet pod biting bullet pod yeah on twitter and it's biting the bullet pod on instagram sorry

01:41:13.620 dude i by the way i looked y'all up on twitter because i was uh sorry on instagram today because

01:41:17.540 i was trying to find um a meme i commented on and your shadow band dude i could i follow y'all and

01:41:23.940 it still wouldn't bring god damn it again yeah i literally i follow you and i typed in biting

01:41:29.860 the bullet and it never came up like it was in the search it happens all the time it makes sense you

01:41:36.980 guys are on instagram though it's basically facebook for illiterates so

01:41:40.420 yeah well we don't we don't post words we don't post any like comments or anything we just post memes

01:41:48.420 we had 13 000 followers at one point and then we got fucking deleted and it was during kyle rittenhouse

01:41:54.660 when we got deleted and obviously of course and then yeah we were yeah we were posting some savages

01:42:01.220 memes during that time but but uh it's biting the bullet pod it used to be podcast but it's biting

01:42:08.580 the bullet podcast on instagram and you can find our pod our podcast page on instagram and that's

01:42:14.340 our most famous shit and yeah i'm it's more at the real typo yeah it's way more famous more people

01:42:22.420 know us from our instagram than anything that's how i knew y'all i didn't even know y'all had a podcast

01:42:31.460 and everybody's like you guys have a podcast

01:42:33.060 it is always super funny when cole comes out some instagram shape be like these guys are like

01:42:39.860 super big we should have them on the show and we go on twitter and they're like they have like 200

01:42:43.940 followers like why should we give a huge on instagram we're like who gives a

01:42:48.420 fuck well cole can't read so that's the whole yeah

01:42:55.940 the funniest thing was cole came on our podcast and he was like dude i literally became a libertarian

01:43:01.860 through memes oh we we did something guys no he was talking about piki and yo in his book actually

01:43:14.580 oh jose uh jose finish it out or i guess do y'all have anything else do y'all have any

01:43:19.300 no that was it that's it all right yeah basically y'all's y'all's y'all's podcast is kind of

01:43:24.900 i love what you guys do thank you for having us on yeah thanks but y'all y'all basically the same

01:43:29.700 vibe with your podcast too it's kind of the same yeah a little bit a little bit more uh military

01:43:34.260 stuff so if you hate tower gang hate us hate them too okay yeah you have to hate everybody without on

01:43:41.460 the show so yes anyone we remotely associate i will let you know i've associated with a lot of people

01:43:45.940 so start blocking um that's right but yeah i'm uh no way jose is my show uh you can follow me on

01:43:52.180 twitter at 2020 no way jose i have i'm on my podcast is on uh fucking youtube all the major

01:43:58.500 podcast and let's see that's all i got then uh i'm tower king cole and then um yes we're gonna get

01:44:07.700 on burt chrysher that's uh we've emailed him already he said he would come on yes yeah i know

01:44:14.820 burt chrysher we're always gonna get uh call him to rail you guys going shirtless yeah dude yeah

01:44:19.060 dude shirtless well cole won't because his wife won't let him i'll i'll try to convince her to

01:44:24.420 just your bitch but yeah burt we've emailed him so we're trying to get that put together uh

01:44:31.300 call him to rail should be sometime he said that he uh went back in a couple weeks i think he's

01:44:35.780 actually building a new like podcast what cole is saying is we have no idea who's on next week

01:44:40.020 next week yeah no fucking clue daniel how you doing man you want to get on

01:44:46.900 just kidding but but dude we're thanks for everybody that actually did like retweet all

01:44:52.420 our shit with burt because we tried so fucking hard and it worked out so if you bully people

01:44:59.380 sometimes enough it gets them on so you just gotta harass them on twitter yeah go ahead sorry

01:45:06.260 no i was like that's kind of your guys's thing you guys just bully them enough that they come on the

01:45:09.620 show yeah exactly i mean and i'm not gonna lie top lobster has been super fucking clutch because

01:45:14.740 when a few that he's made art like that's what i think your artwork does like 90 of the work

01:45:21.380 make artwork with everybody from your show coming on the gas

01:45:25.300 and then they will come on your show and really the tower thing has just been a great algo hack to be

01:45:30.580 able to get them to notice because when you have like almost a million followers so many things fall

01:45:35.620 through the cracks so having that so once again all of our tower game people all the people have been

01:45:40.740 there from the beginning you are what make this happens like unironically uh as opposed to that

01:45:45.700 unironic faggot um but you may although he does actually really boost the show too so all the haters

01:45:51.540 and the lovers the homies are what makes this show happen and we're really appreciative of all of

01:45:56.660 you oh yeah and uh well yeah i'm anarcho tone on twitter and if anybody is in the boston area they

01:46:04.660 might see me at the dave smith and robbie the fire show on both thursday and friday potentially this

01:46:11.060 week so tomorrow and the day after that so i will be yeah dave smith and robbie the fire having two

01:46:17.940 comedy shows in boston tomorrow and the following night and then the next night is vaccine passport city in

01:46:24.660 boston so i was so drunk and stoned i thought you were saying you might be on part of the problem

01:46:28.740 and run your mouth i was like what you didn't fucking tell us they're doing a comedy show and

01:46:34.100 a live podcast and i will be in attendance for both of those things i think okay well i don't know why

01:46:40.260 you're plugging being in attendance for things that's cool because if anybody's near me come out you know

01:46:46.340 come to the show say hi all the people we just made fun of are going to come up and beat your ass

01:46:50.340 oh dude i'll see you on that all the people who like to talk shit online i will 100 percent

01:46:58.340 hit the fucking lp florida convention i don't remember what the day i'll be there too but yeah

01:47:02.580 if you really fucking all the fucking people who are like oh you're just some shit talker online

01:47:07.220 if you really want to fucking swing at me i don't give a shit everyone that gives this

01:47:11.060 impression that i'm some fucking internet tough guy no i've also done a lot of martial arts i've worked

01:47:16.260 out my entire life i'm not scared of you some random libertarian yeah like my point being and

01:47:22.900 i'm not saying i'm some big giant badass but at the same time it's not like i'm like oh my god i'm

01:47:27.460 scared of people in real life yeah we're not you're not bad nobody's saying you're a giant i'm not a giant

01:47:33.860 i'm a little guy but i will you up or at least or at least make you regret trying it

01:47:39.140 if you want to fuck you can go back and be like yeah the little midget fucked me up please

01:47:55.780 fucking do god hey it was great having you on guys thank you thank code it was nice meeting

01:48:03.460 you yeah it was always great seeing you guys yeah love what you're doing thanks guys luke typo yeah

01:48:10.340 thanks guys all right peace out

Tower Gang - January 14, 2022

Ep 52 - Pecker Checker w⧸ Luke & Typo from Biting the Bullet

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