Tower Gang - September 16, 2022Ep 88 - Funnier Than Figs w⧸ Tyler Janke, Garbage Mane & Adam Nutter
Episode Stats
Length
1 hour and 43 minutes
Words per Minute
203.92682
Hate Speech Sentences
230
Summary
It's another episode of Power Hour, this time without most of the boring characters. We have a failed comedian, a failed engineer, and a failed racist to fill in for the other boring characters, but it's still fun.
Transcript
00:00:05.200
Women jerk off dicks like fucking they're an unruly ferret.
00:00:16.680
You see, the socialists don't have an accurate answer for this, and she needs to account for it.
00:00:26.460
We can stay horny and retarded longer than she can stay sane.
00:00:33.580
Ben, maybe you could say we had sex, but we didn't fuck.
00:00:50.000
It's another episode of Tower of Power Hour, this time without most of the boring characters.
00:00:55.060
So we just brought in some other boring characters instead.
00:00:58.060
We had a failed comic, a failed engineer, whatever garbage man does, a failed racist, and then me and Jose.
00:01:07.220
So we're going to have fun because everybody else's pussies or two are shitting themselves.
00:01:14.300
Toad, I think, is going to Tom Wood's birthday party for little kids.
00:01:30.360
I mean, it was partly because you guys screwed up and planned yours tonight, and we had scheduled ours.
00:01:34.820
I think that was you guys because we never said we weren't doing one this week, and we always do it at the same time.
00:01:40.380
All we said is we were rescheduling last week's to Sunday.
00:01:47.580
I mean, I guess technically that's this week since it was Sunday, but whatever.
00:01:51.480
Dave Smith's throwing a fucking monkey wrench and everything.
00:01:53.360
I was supposed to have Jose and fucking Top on, and then I got pushed back.
00:02:03.940
Actually, the body 100%, plus I think the tattoos for you.
00:02:07.640
I think tattoos on a slim body look way better.
00:02:14.360
I already took it as you said it to me, and now we're going with that forever.
00:02:23.400
I feel like you do that dying shit that Pete totally did.
00:02:40.240
By the way, tattoos on a really skinny guy is a very – it's like the gateway to meth.
00:02:47.100
You're either a meth head or you just really like to look awesome.
00:03:15.620
I said Adam's been having some great guests on The Cult of Us except for Mike Figgs.
00:03:24.100
I don't – I feel so bad having an irrational hatred for someone who's done nothing to me.
00:03:31.300
There's a couple of those that come on Legion of Skanks.
00:03:41.240
Because he's – he just – he doesn't get it.
00:03:48.480
Who – is Mike Figgs the guy who runs the LP New Hampshire account?
00:04:05.920
I think, like, on LOS, like, you got to really, you know, know your shit.
00:04:17.060
He's like, oh, we're going to have a guest this week.
00:04:18.980
He's like – or he could just get somebody else.
00:04:21.420
We have noticed because we like to flirt and try to get some, like, comedians in our show.
00:04:25.680
And it is – there are people who are good comedians but they're not good comedic podcasters.
00:04:39.280
So Figgs, for all I know, could be a hilarious stand-up comedian.
00:05:00.520
You guys are ripping on Alex Jones as Clint is hoping he's still coming on his show.
00:05:18.680
I got to talk Holocaust revisionism with Dave last night.
00:05:27.100
And I think this is one of the only times where someone's disagreed.
00:05:29.780
Aside from maybe like the Spike thing, but it was like more formal.
00:05:36.240
And it wasn't like – I don't think anyone got steamrolled.
00:05:39.680
You know, I mean, Tyler keeps framing it like it was taken to the woodshed.
00:05:45.800
It was definitely a weird combination of things.
00:05:48.980
You have to admit, at one point, I'm looking at Reed.
00:05:52.580
Now, granted, his video did freeze, but it looked like he was in a catatonic state just kind of looking.
00:05:58.240
As Dave is talking about how ridiculous the LPNH – stupid.
00:06:11.620
And it was – I think it was probably – I mean, definitely I'm sure it will get the views.
00:06:16.700
I actually wasn't trying to make a confrontational because I didn't really – I wasn't really interested in that aspect.
00:06:22.460
Oh, the agorist isn't interested in the party policy?
00:06:26.960
I find that stuff juicy, but a lot of the stuff is like behind-the-scenes stuff that you don't want to say out loud.
00:06:32.040
So to like – and, you know, I wasn't – not shit we're going to air out.
00:06:35.760
So it's like it wasn't really a conversation I wanted to have like that on the open.
00:06:41.600
And also I don't really feel like there was any – I knew it was just going to be, well, this is what I think.
00:06:48.320
And it's like I didn't really see what the point of it was, but that's where it went.
00:06:52.740
I mean, I guess they got to lay out their points, but I feel like Dave's probably heard them before.
00:06:56.780
There was a lot of sexual tension going on there.
00:07:00.380
There was actually some sexual tension in there.
00:07:06.000
What was the point that you can watch on YouTube, you fucking weirdo?
00:07:08.420
So I was sitting in bed and Alyssa was like, are you getting on?
00:07:13.340
I'm just in here to troll them to hopefully – because I think Jose saw it one time.
00:07:21.020
And it throws me off because, like, it's top hopping in.
00:07:23.620
And I'm like, but I don't see a fucking picture because you don't put the picture up.
00:07:26.960
And so I'm like, I'm waiting for him to bring it up.
00:07:34.820
I was getting the live chat to type in in the chat to have me come on.
00:07:41.160
Dude, when you have a guest like that, it's so hard to pay attention to the chat.
00:07:44.380
Cole was like a male groupie trying to slide into, like, a Led Zeppelin country.
00:07:47.640
I just wanted to feel like he was a part of something.
00:08:08.060
It's like, we still haven't gotten enough beer or got enough cocaine to even fuck you,
00:08:13.500
It's like, that security guy was getting fired after that night.
00:08:18.180
Someone said in the chat, maybe if they just stuck with conspiracy theories, everyone would
00:08:26.540
Um, I just found that funny because it's like, it made me realize that, holy shit, we actually
00:08:34.400
Like, that's what they know us as in the conspiracy podcast.
00:08:38.420
Like, we've taken on so many different forms that like, we have like different little sex
00:08:46.900
That was, that, looking back on it, I'm like, wow, that guy is actually like pretty like well
00:08:56.740
It is very weird when I, whenever I like think back, like, wait, we had that person on?
00:09:02.100
Personally, that was one of my least favorite episodes, but like it got a shitload of views.
00:09:06.380
The only thing that was good about it, it was like, there was a great payoff for like
00:09:19.560
Like, uh, well, I mean, yeah, I mean, the numbers, I mean, they don't really, uh, add
00:09:23.560
up, uh, you know, like we can, Oh no, he was the one that said like, Oh, you put them
00:09:27.120
out all in the field and just let them starve to death.
00:09:30.140
It would take, it would take longer than they actually did.
00:09:36.940
He said it would be faster to just, uh, put them all in a field.
00:09:40.660
And cause I did a, I put that on one of my clip shows.
00:09:45.200
You're not going to, first of all, you could cannibalize.
00:09:47.340
And so when people start dying, you could, you know, have, you have instant food and
00:09:51.040
you can't, if you have a 6 million people, let's just say that number, uh, how are you
00:10:01.140
That's why I, that's why I love, you know, really niche, like conspiracy theories, because
00:10:06.000
If you believe in flat earth, there is no way you're going to believe the Holocaust.
00:10:09.460
I mean, that's, I mean, legitimately like you've already, you already believe something.
00:10:14.340
That was what he was like, I don't know, this might get me canceled.
00:10:25.780
We, we, we, we have heard about that and, uh, we all enjoyed it.
00:10:33.300
Like you're not going to, people like try to make that appeal to us.
00:10:36.400
You're gonna be like, oh, you're telling me I'm making political moves while not doing
00:10:43.360
I think, I think someone on Twitter the other day, they were like, if LPNH isn't gonna,
00:10:48.160
uh, buy by, you know, the LP rules, maybe they should just secede.
00:10:51.480
And I was just, and I was thinking that's what they probably want to do.
00:10:55.280
They probably legitimately would rather like, they don't care.
00:11:00.560
Like you talk to those guys and it very much was like, yeah, by even doing all this, you're
00:11:05.460
Cause they, those guys really just don't give a fuck about any of the other things.
00:11:09.580
They doubled down today on the Meghan McCain shit.
00:11:13.540
Now that you mentioned, uh, now that you mentioned I'm anti-Semitic, I might have to stay with
00:11:27.100
Like the, not the flag, which I think that's actually there, isn't it?
00:11:33.940
Oh, I thought the flag might be right actually behind him because I could see that.
00:11:37.800
No, it's, it's, but you took the picture, the actual, the background picture, right?
00:11:43.920
No, but I would, uh, what's the, there's a black Confederate guy on YouTube and I just
00:11:51.580
I forget his name, but he, no, I forget his name, but he's actually really good on like
00:12:03.480
I don't know what it was, but there was, it was Ryan Dawson talking, but the dude is like,
00:12:14.740
He was like on a couch, just like with a microphone.
00:12:18.640
And the Jews, I'm like, dude, just like giving up.
00:12:23.500
He had a debate the other night or coming up with Jay Dyer or whatever.
00:12:30.760
I didn't realize I was very much like, I was like, I think Jay will wipe the floor with him.
00:12:34.200
But I guess Reed was saying, uh, fucking, um, what's his face?
00:12:42.080
Cause I know it brought to mind the whole thing where he was like challenging Dave on
00:12:46.340
I'm like, dude, you're barking up the wrong tree.
00:12:53.420
Oh, I can't imagine what he was like in college.
00:13:05.660
Would you believe he went to an all black college?
00:13:23.800
You guys want to start getting into these faggots, uh, in the, in the back?
00:13:29.080
Uh, I mean, I guess you can kind of run this Tyler cause this is your stick.
00:13:34.400
I was going to say what we're going to do is we're going to have them do your whole,
00:13:38.340
And then we're going to have them stick around after.
00:13:40.400
And we're going to like pick off rounds of the, uh, the slurman.
00:13:44.260
Tyler, you got to explain it to me because I haven't seen the show.
00:13:48.260
So I actually was watching kill Tony yesterday, but I haven't seen, uh, did
00:13:55.060
I didn't think it was as good as the one with just Joe Rogan before, but needless
00:14:01.260
There's these losers are going to come on and not losers, uh, Eric, uh, they're
00:14:05.920
They're going to have their one minute rant about whatever they want.
00:14:17.540
When they hear this, if you can hear that, do you hear that?
00:14:26.620
Uh, but you know, if they go over too long, then you're going to hear this one for Adolf
00:14:33.260
So that's, that's when that's like the Hollywood bear.
00:14:40.200
He was a brilliant, uh, but Andy and I, you know, we run this show.
00:14:50.600
Wait, wait, wait, hold on before, before this happens, before this happens, uh, yes, we're
00:14:59.580
So if you guys haven't met, you know who he is, you should know he's been a very big
00:15:07.620
So something, by the way, I never thought we would bring him on the show.
00:15:11.580
Some of you, some of you are going to say that's not P Nord, that's toad, but you're
00:15:30.300
So, uh, P Nord, you know, this, uh, look at your shirt.
00:15:35.660
You've got a much different audience than the one you normally do.
00:15:45.100
So, uh, I thought of a different story when I thought it was just going to be a kill
00:15:48.620
pods, but, uh, just as I was in the back room, I thought of a great story
00:15:54.620
So I, uh, so Spokane comedy club, they opened up like 2015, maybe early 2016.
00:16:00.700
Um, I, I came back to Spokane a little bit before, a little bit after they just opened
00:16:07.160
Um, but, so caught it right at the beginning anyway.
00:16:10.140
Um, uh, one of the nights Andrew Schultz came and I showed up super early.
00:16:15.240
I had gotten sushi before and, um, and, but my eyes were bigger than my stomach.
00:16:20.960
And so I had a bunch of extra sushi left and, and I brought it to the comedy club.
00:16:25.560
Like thinking like, like I was friends with like, you know, like the waitresses and the
00:16:28.900
people there, the, you know, the managing stuff.
00:16:43.480
They're like, what the fuck did you just bring in sushi?
00:16:53.580
I mean, to be fair, we know the story of you bringing sushi.
00:17:04.960
So Andrew, right when I'm like, just like, you know, like, like Adolf Hitler, like who
00:17:16.700
You still got about 20 some seconds to finish this shit up.
00:17:28.200
You learned to understand your stage presence, your time.
00:17:31.140
Uh, those things need to hammer out a little better.
00:17:35.180
Does anybody want to hear the actual end of the story?
00:17:46.100
The point is being a homeless man tells stories like a homeless man.
00:17:54.100
The point is I, I had sushi with Andrew Schultz in the green room and that was the precipice
00:18:07.900
I'm still trying to figure out how that was a funny story.
00:18:14.480
I mean, I get it, but I got to eat like a random fan's sushi.
00:18:21.120
He's like, yo bro, I got this sushi from leftover.
00:18:45.500
You know, I'll go ahead and let you, you know, you're here.
00:18:48.060
I was a little bit disrespectful, but that's kind of your role here.
00:18:50.180
So, but just, you know, just to show him I'm a generous God.
00:18:53.560
I'll let you pick the bracket we go with, P-Nord.
00:18:57.400
Do you like Fudge Packer versus Pan-Faced Gook?
00:19:10.040
Oh, by the way, before we do it, I heard another good one.
00:19:22.320
Like, it's kind of, like, way up there, you know?
00:19:28.340
There's no way you'd get in that situation, P-Nord.
00:19:34.560
I didn't even talk about the pussy's, like, way up here, and you have to, like, you know,
00:19:38.900
This is the best toad impression I've ever seen.
00:19:48.700
Please tell me I'm not that obnoxious and I laugh.
00:19:59.540
I need you to pick one or you're going to get booted.
00:20:09.960
I want to say Toad gave us his votes beforehand.
00:20:12.760
I don't remember them all, nor do I care to go look at them.
00:20:21.460
So, Toad, I'm sorry, but your votes don't count.
00:20:31.660
A white guy with cum on him or just a white guy?
00:20:34.720
I think it's just – we were very – it's hard to find good white slurs because, again,
00:20:44.660
Yeah, and so this was like the best we could get as far as just for white people.
00:20:49.900
And if you want to go with it, I mean, you can maybe do like just a Canadian.
00:21:02.380
So, you didn't obviously ask any black guys because I'm sure they might have some slurs for white guys.
00:21:16.440
I was just going to say, Andy, that's a gentleman behind you.
00:21:23.000
Actually, Andy, what does your daughter call you?
00:21:43.040
Actually, that would be a slur to a black guy, I guess.
00:21:45.140
Let's start from top to bottom to make it easier.
00:21:55.880
I'm not like super excited about Yogurt Yeti either,
00:22:02.500
but I like Yogurt Yeti better than Come Dumpster.
00:22:06.320
And plus, I think the hole versus Sugarfoot hole
00:22:09.840
and then hole versus Come Dumpster, you're like, eh.
00:22:13.240
I'm not going to try to give my – before we get there,
00:22:16.080
but I'm kind of going with the Sugarfoot on that one.
00:22:29.860
and if we're going to properly represent the white man,
00:23:25.820
and I'm trying not to just be against everybody,
00:23:34.560
hey, you know what a cum dumpster literally means?
00:23:40.700
Or actually, you're just a receptacle of trash.
00:24:03.840
I guess black women and all other types of women
00:24:08.240
But, I mean, it also can nail some gay guys as well.
00:24:33.420
I kind of agree with Cole on everything he said.
00:24:39.860
And, like, what better to call some dumb ethot whore,
00:24:45.000
your whole existence is just to take other dudes cum.
00:24:54.380
nothing you can say about us hurts my feelings.
00:25:04.820
then cum dumpster to demean all women and gays.
00:26:07.300
like a lot of your argumentation of like how derogatory it is,
00:26:47.420
I just don't want to have to deal with the trouble of –
00:26:49.920
the minor inconvenience of searching down Toad's fucking answers.
00:27:06.020
JC coming up with cum trumpster is MAGA boomers.
00:27:27.620
Do you normally have them come back later or now?
00:27:33.620
But what I typically do is we have him on for a little bit.
00:27:36.900
last time it was a shit show because I left everybody on.
00:27:39.660
And it was like Brady Bunch meets something else.
00:27:49.680
I was worried he was going to just sit there so he could talk in the private chat.
00:27:55.900
You don't give the backdoor secrets here, Jose.
00:28:01.260
I am so glad I was able to join the show tonight and see every single type of white guy on the screen.
00:28:19.640
It's a tough, tough day for me because at the end of the day, I really fucking despise the conspiracy theory side of it.
00:28:26.960
But, everyone from the no-planers to aliens shot it with space lasers and everything else.
00:28:34.320
It was used to launch two wars and kill millions of people.
00:28:39.840
And it's getting down into the weeds of debating over who did what and how it was pulled off is just a time suck.
00:29:06.420
The, is it the seminal fluid or whatever it is?
00:29:26.360
Actually, it's kind of like a really cool way of just like instead of, you know, you don't have to get surgery for fucking get the little snip snip.
00:29:45.900
Yeah, it's like, it's just, all my swimmers just lay there.
00:30:07.640
Do you think some people do actually have like larger sperm, like legitimately just bigger sperm?
00:30:14.460
Like, I mean, because there's something, there's that point to which there's got to be some sperm that is like absolutely huge.
00:30:21.580
I actually do have an answer for this because the urologist, after he was looking at it under the microscope, he goes, yeah, they seem about in the medium range of size.
00:30:33.980
Is it like noticeable to the human eye or like a microscope?
00:30:39.760
Well, yeah, they have like a measurement device in there.
00:30:42.460
Did you have your cum checked before this accident to compare?
00:30:49.420
The only thing was he was saying that my testosterone level was still normal.
00:30:53.340
So he would have hated to meet me beforehand because apparently I was a wild man.
00:31:01.160
Once again, I'll give you the pick of the litter here.
00:31:12.700
Female versus Glow Nigger or Panface Gook versus Fudge Packer.
00:31:16.840
Well, it's going to have to be Panface Gook and Fudge Packer.
00:31:22.720
Which, if you don't know, Panface Gook is, of course, just Asians or I think specifically Vietnamese, correct?
00:31:29.560
Because that is that not supposed to be something because we kind of.
00:31:35.580
I think I think this is specific to a actual region of Asia.
00:31:40.060
Because I think it was supposed to because was it John McCain that or is it like a science of racism right here?
00:31:46.340
It was it was it was it was it was it was John McCain that said that said gook or was it?
00:31:53.300
So I think is that a Korean or Vietnamese Vietnamese, right?
00:32:01.700
It has a root from the Korean War because the Koreans trying to get away from the war zone will come up to American GIs and say,
00:32:25.640
Why don't we just call all the Vietnamese then?
00:32:30.260
I mean, you could you could choose many others.
00:32:39.780
My wife in the chat said that all Asians look the same.
00:32:45.880
There's a lot of Asians that like, I mean, technically, Filipinos look totally different pretty easily.
00:32:57.300
The only ones is like Japanese and Korean can kind of get kind of.
00:33:04.660
The Chinese definitely don't make that mistake in real life.
00:33:13.360
Those are the only ones that look a little bit different to me.
00:33:19.440
Well, Jose, you only see people in terms of their body type.
00:33:25.720
Apparently Adam had to go to the kitchen for some strange reason.
00:34:14.700
So pan-faced goop could be that hottie that Jose is talking about.
00:34:48.000
Because I like fudge packer, and I also like its sister, Carpet Muncher.
00:34:56.280
Because they just describe what these two degenerate people are doing.
00:35:03.460
And then sticking their dick into some shitty asshole.
00:35:12.360
It has the history with John McCain calling and saying it.
00:35:15.900
But, like, I mean, I think slope is a better, like, slur just for Asian people.
00:35:24.720
But, like, fudge packer, I got to go with that.
00:35:27.680
Just because I think it hurts them more to say, like, now.
00:35:45.160
Yeah, they're going to think you're just saying, oh, I'm a friend.
00:35:47.760
Well, I mean, any organized gook is going to think that you're calling him a gook.
00:35:53.020
Because they might think you're talking about phrenology.
00:36:07.680
Again, I feel like it's more of a full-blown insult.
00:36:11.080
Especially now I learned the history of what gook means.
00:36:17.540
It'd be like if nigger actually meant something sweet.
00:36:24.160
For me, that's, like, a weird mind game aspect.
00:36:32.180
But if we're just going, again, straight insult that hurts your feelings, I feel like calling a gay dude a fudge packer.
00:36:38.120
It's very 90s and 80s, and it's very funny to me.
00:36:45.900
If you replaced fudge packer with Brad Palumbo, I would choose it.
00:36:53.840
You might be right because of the climate we're in.
00:37:10.020
I think if it adds meaningful context, it adds extra damage.
00:37:13.680
I think, like, if done right, it makes it more impactful.
00:37:32.620
Eric, you can either tie this up or we'll send Toad.
00:37:44.020
I don't know why Fudge Packer was picked over Pooh Pusher because it just seems like a little more of a visual that you get on that one.
00:37:53.060
Pooh Pusher actually works pretty well, too, because it's also...
00:38:05.820
I bet if you are going to scream pan-faced gook and you're doing it in the heat of the battle, you're going to miss a few words there.
00:38:21.160
You've got to pick one of those two slurs to go with.
00:38:29.900
If you did go out into the public and you just yelled one of these words, that should be the ultimate tiebreaker.
00:38:35.840
If you just went out to the public and you just yelled pan-faced gook.
00:38:38.640
What do you think Adam's been getting up and doing this the whole time?
00:38:41.120
Adam keeps getting up and leaving and yelling at his wife.
00:38:44.220
Gook will get way more heads turned than Fudge Packer.
00:38:48.920
Fudge Packer is some bullshit a 12-year-old says.
00:38:59.900
I think either way, this was something that you would scream if you were walking around in San Francisco and you just stepped in human shit.
00:39:06.720
Either one of these would be the words you would say.
00:39:10.040
There's fucking Fudge Packers over here shitting on the sidewalks.
00:39:13.840
Why don't you shove that shit back up your ass?
00:39:17.740
Yeah, what are you going to go with, Eric, on this one?
00:39:21.460
Because, I mean, you really have to use all of the muscles in your face to say it.
00:39:29.940
But you've got to use the muscles when you've really got to...
00:39:31.980
And you have to enunciate every single syllable.
00:39:39.360
You can say it like a very, like, mysterious, racist, like, you know, fucking, like, goddamn pan-faced gook.
00:39:45.940
Do you think, like, the hard K at the end is better than the hard R?
00:39:51.000
Yeah, the hard K at the end, I mean, that's enough velocity that spit will leave your mouth and hit their face.
00:39:56.440
I feel like if you say better, what do you mean by better?
00:40:00.900
Like, a gook, like, hitting a hard, like, K or hitting a hard R.
00:40:12.260
I think you need, like, a flare, like, in the syllable, or another syllable, but in the vowel, and, like, really enunciate it.
00:40:18.260
Like, some sort of southern drawl to the flare of, like, gook!
00:40:23.800
You could get some phlegm in your throat there and go, really K it up, you know?
00:40:29.220
So, David Ray said I can imagine a Vietnam vet using pan-faced gook, but I can also imagine them saying fudge packer as well.
00:40:36.020
You're stabbing with a band hit, you goddamn pan-faced gook!
00:40:51.700
A gook-faced fudge packer is actually a really good one.
00:41:02.160
That's like Andy No, Andy No, that's what that is.
00:41:04.800
Oh, by the way, Andy is also the one that came up with Beanerschnitzel.
00:41:07.800
No, Andy No, N-G-O, the fucking gay Asian reporter.
00:41:12.540
The guy hit up in the head with a cement milkshake.
00:41:19.800
Yes, Beanerschnitzel was his one that he gave us, I know that for sure.
00:41:34.940
I feel like both are acceptable answers, honestly.
00:41:38.220
It's like P-Nord could be a street shitter, you know what I'm saying?
00:41:52.040
Cole, are you saying you haven't shit in a street?
00:42:22.860
Would you rather spend a week with P-Nord or a week in Mumbai, India?
00:42:31.720
I bet Mumbai has sights and P-Nord also has sights, but I don't want to see them.
00:42:37.400
The potential for a hot Indian woman to walk by goes up when you're in Mumbai, not when
00:42:44.140
Yeah, but if you're with P-Nord, your attractiveness level goes up like tenfold.
00:42:50.860
You know, I instantly become a ten right next door.
00:42:53.700
Does it work with men if you go out with an uglier man?
00:43:11.500
You get an insecure fat friend, but it has like a gravitas to him that brings in people's
00:43:17.280
very talkative, jovial, and then you just be the strong, silent type and swoop up a pussy.
00:43:27.100
Like, which one am I coming in for while he's fucking entertaining?
00:43:29.440
Yeah, if your fat friend's not funny, then why even have him around?
00:43:36.220
And he's got to be insecure because fat- this is a true- a lot of fat guys don't realize
00:43:39.700
this, especially if you take good care of yourself, you're well put together, well-dressed.
00:44:04.920
It's just not- it's not the grade A. It's like grade F pussy.
00:44:22.320
That's why I said it's the insecure, funny, fat guy.
00:44:28.940
And then my wife also said, I've gotten a lot of girls going out with Cole, which is
00:44:45.500
Did you do this move where you're jerking off the corner and she's making out with some
00:44:51.300
Usually we're in a club and I don't want to get kicked out.
00:44:55.760
I mean, I would definitely do that, but there's something awkward about that to where you're
00:45:06.460
What was very weird is because I was sitting there and Elizabeth was dancing with the girl
00:45:14.640
I'm talking about the situation if you bring them back, but they're like, well, we don't
00:45:20.700
I'll say it's like a legit gay chick and you're like, you've got to stay up there.
00:45:23.580
I guess that's, if that's all I'm getting, I'd do it, but there'd be something very weird.
00:45:33.980
It sounds like it's coming through his computer, right?
00:45:47.080
Were you guys just talking about Tom Woods 2000?
00:46:02.660
Cole just found out that he's his wife's wingman.
00:46:07.660
She's like, I'm using my uglier husband to get hotter chicks.
00:46:11.120
But would you be your wife's wingman if she was getting like hot chicks and then you get to bang the hot chick as well?
00:46:28.960
Your wife's like, hey, I'm trying to set you up a three-way.
00:46:41.660
Sitting awkwardly in the corner while she does it all by herself?
00:46:50.080
Like, it's either you beat, like, your wife goes and hits on women and then, like, takes
00:47:00.620
I mean, I'm not really too worried about my wife running off with a woman because, I mean,
00:47:24.380
But, Tyler, you were pushing against that, weren't you?
00:47:47.880
Yeah, we just ignore the sodomy fucking persons.
00:48:33.060
And she was like the first girl that I guess I had like.
00:48:37.780
And then I never liked a black girl after that.
00:48:51.580
You were her mail ticket out of the hood, Cole.
00:49:01.100
This motherfucker looks like he has health insurance.
00:49:13.340
Thanks, Eric, for joining the Kill podcast slash whatever this is.
00:49:32.120
Anything more than like five sides, you're getting crazy.
00:49:41.500
I do know someone who was in the parking lot and she said that she saw the plane boom
00:50:03.180
Yeah, you just have fed friends that were there.
00:50:12.960
We got hole and sugar foot and she male and glow nigger.
00:50:24.300
We'll do she male and glow nigger unless you guys object.
00:50:28.880
And you guys are retarded if you say otherwise.
00:50:30.700
Because once again, she male, there are so many better ones for training.
00:50:34.980
But I guess we were trying to get specific with whether it's male or female or female.
00:50:38.360
Because that was the big thing is we had zipper tips on one side.
00:50:41.100
You guys are so focused on specific categories.
00:50:53.040
I'll also go ahead and just go and start glow nigger.
00:51:02.080
Apparently, it started from, I don't know, 4chan or whatever.
00:51:06.700
And they just started calling them glow niggers.
00:51:12.120
It's like the entomology of this fucking word I use regularly.
00:51:15.960
And it ends up being even cooler when I know where it really came from.
00:51:34.400
And I changed the group chat to like aggressively racist shit.
00:51:42.680
And I was on the goddamn train going to Gas Digital.
00:51:47.620
And there's like two black guys sitting next to me.
00:51:49.080
Like, oh, it's going to be a problem if they see this.
00:51:56.020
And you're like, hey, guys, look what group chat I'm in.
00:52:00.580
Which actually, did you hear that story that they were saying that there's that one, was
00:52:05.660
it a porn star or something that they had on that actually was being racist and like
00:52:10.100
all of like Gas Digital was like, what the fuck is going on?
00:52:12.940
Were you talking about the Sarah J thing and Chrissy May?
00:52:15.300
Were they like, she got mad because Gina Biscondi came on and said like nigger a bunch?
00:52:21.860
Because then they found the porn of her being like the racist porn.
00:52:24.820
Yeah, this was some whore who was just like legitimately being racist, but like not at all humorously.
00:52:34.580
Just in the back of Gas Digital being like, right?
00:52:39.780
So are you guys saying all your racist stuff is funny?
00:52:50.400
What makes something really funny is when there's a good chunk of truth in there.
00:52:54.440
So on the name of the group chat stuff, I have this Garmin watch that pops up my notifications
00:53:01.500
and I'm sitting at the table in a trial and it pops up and I look because I have my phone
00:53:07.320
silenced and my client looks over and I just like to turn my wrist.
00:53:15.440
I just wish you were up at the, you know, when they come or whatever come up.
00:53:27.580
I should have looked at it, got it, reached over and said, hey, you want to read it?
00:53:35.020
Or when the teacher would be like, see a note getting past the class and so they'd pull
00:53:40.180
It's like, Mr. Yankee, are you reading text messages in my courtroom?
00:53:49.600
Tyler, I do not believe your story that you ironically titled this poem, Nigger.
00:54:07.300
Otherwise, he loses an hour of his electricity privileges.
00:54:14.560
I just imagine David during these, like, studiously making notes.
00:54:26.280
Yeah, we could, I could, we could, we could fudge pack him.
00:54:30.020
Yeah, these aren't sex crimes for us broadcasting this to him anymore.
00:54:45.620
Dude, why don't you keep doing this all fucked up?
00:54:54.140
All right, well, we're already, I already started.
00:55:00.520
So, anytime you're mixing a man's name with a female, it's already about as low as you
00:55:06.480
So, the fact that you combine those two is, to me, derogatory to a man.
00:55:24.520
Like, you didn't think my parents, I heard this all the time growing up.
00:55:45.080
At Tyler's next trial, the opposition will play that and go, your honor, I rest my case.
00:56:19.160
Before we move on, did you see Claire Foster's tweet the other day?
00:56:31.200
She said the new show with Hillary Clinton, Gutsy, is great and amazing.
00:56:39.880
I really hope they come out with one about Michelle Obama called Ballsy.
00:56:53.100
I remember when it was like at like a thousand followers and I was in a group chat with them.
00:57:09.040
As a member of the 4chan caucus, I'm going to have to go glow nigger.
00:57:15.500
I swear some of y'all are just intentionally just being, you know, contrarian and just going with the gay answers here throughout this.
00:57:24.740
With me with Shemail is I was like I was kicked out of the discord because of Shemail.
00:57:29.240
And so to me, I've never been kicked out of it.
00:57:35.820
But the thing is I have never, I have never been kicked out of any like group I've in.
00:57:42.320
I've ever been in online for saying the N word.
00:57:51.020
I was kicked out of a libertarian discord group.
00:58:09.500
Doing it in weird hours of the night to see like, then like slowly where there's higher
00:58:28.980
I got my, my, my discord itself got, uh, from a different discord, but, but yes, I miss
00:58:35.300
the days when you, uh, you guys would like show me the shit you were causing actually
00:58:42.140
I would just go in there and just cause all sorts of shit and make people upset.
00:58:46.340
This is why we'll never be fucking successful because we're just too trying to, we're just
00:58:52.760
As I laid out in my episode last week, I a hundred percent disagree.
00:58:56.000
I think that's, I think that's proper political maneuvering.
00:58:58.620
Fucking bully out all the faggots, uh, you know, rally your fucking friends and fucking
00:59:05.320
Uh, you know, this is why Lydia will never like you, Jose.
00:59:16.720
She's just like, no, I mean, she's not like thick.
00:59:20.320
She's just like that, like skinny fat where it's like, you know what I mean though?
00:59:25.900
It's like, there's like thick where like they got some curves, but like, she's just like
00:59:30.200
thick in the literal meaning of the word, you know?
00:59:33.720
It's when those girls are like, they're, they're, they're big, but they still have no
00:59:41.120
I've only seen her like here or like shoulders up, but that's just like, I feel like I'm
00:59:46.440
All the, uh, dudes, you know, no, uh, fudge packing.
00:59:51.080
No, it's like whenever they, uh, fizzy, not fizzy, non, fizzy, non, I mean, whatever
01:00:02.560
They'll always post people's face and be like a fizzy, fizzy on many, it's such a fucking
01:00:08.120
Is it like, uh, there's like a G in there, but I don't know what the fuck it was.
01:00:14.100
Is that science that Hitler used to, uh, if they were like, if they're Aryan or not?
01:00:20.760
But now they just do it to be like all these like losers, especially like big influencers
01:00:25.020
and they'll just post their face and be like, look at this fucking dork.
01:00:31.680
I can just tell, like, I don't think it's a curvy broad, but like Jose, Jose passing up
01:00:44.780
She is the type that you normally see with a mixed race child.
01:00:48.640
Like, she is definitely like, you know, like back, like, you know, end of the day, you're
01:00:53.500
fucking, you struck out and like, you're pretty cocked pretty well already.
01:00:59.040
Like, but it's not like that bad, you know, like, but it's not like something I'd jump
01:01:05.820
I mean, I would do it sober, uh, a dead serious, but like, this is like bar scenario.
01:01:11.360
This is like, if I've already run out of my foot, you know, I never put it in.
01:01:16.940
Yeah, that one, I'm like, I don't even think she's pretty.
01:01:23.840
No, he's literally just ragging on this bitch for like five minutes and they're like, well,
01:01:40.700
I just, you know, it'd be pretty gross for me not to hit sober.
01:01:46.220
Uh, at the end of the day, like a hole's a hole.
01:01:52.900
I mean, I prefer it to be well adorned, but you know, we want a precious moment statue
01:01:59.580
I'm so, this is so funny because now I can't take anything he says about a woman, like,
01:02:09.460
Cause whenever she's talking to other shit, she'd be like, he would just fuck anything.
01:02:14.600
There are limits to this, but like, it's kind of zeros and ones, but I can still be objective
01:02:23.240
I think, I think the, when you say somebody is ugly, that means unfuckable to me.
01:02:29.500
I get what he's saying, but I was just more fascinated with this turn of like that quick.
01:02:34.040
It was like, she's not sick, she's just fat, she's not going to be drunk for, like way
01:02:44.120
Do you, do you like, you know, I don't mind if they're ugly.
01:02:48.580
The first one comes up, he's like, I don't need anything else.
01:02:53.440
His hand imagination coordination is like off the charts.
01:02:56.720
Jose doesn't get off the for you page for fucking Pornhub.
01:03:00.600
Like, Jose sees a curvy piece of driftwood and just starts jacking off.
01:03:06.540
Fold back an ear, a loose arm, a fat, I'm good to go.
01:03:09.940
You know what, you kind of, that kind of adds to my point though, Cole.
01:03:12.340
Like, say with porn, you have like an unlimited like selection.
01:03:15.140
Like, there's no like, you know, you got to, like, I don't know, there's less on the line.
01:03:19.700
Whereas like getting laid, you're like, you know, this is a sure deal.
01:03:24.500
But like with porn, you're like, I can find a pretty one.
01:03:30.760
There's a difference between a hot chick and like, would you fuck her.
01:03:37.360
But there's also a difference between an ugly, like the other side too.
01:03:41.940
Like, because I mean, there's a very, I feel like, would you fuck and ugly.
01:03:46.260
There's a, I mean, a very large chasm between that.
01:03:51.980
Sometimes if you're in a draft spell, you got to bang an ugly chick just to get your confidence back.
01:03:57.220
Like, I can be like a chick's not good looking and be like, and still be like, that was a fun time.
01:04:01.820
Because dude, the ugly and fat chicks, they will fucking get down.
01:04:06.640
Sometimes they feel like they have to put in the extra effort.
01:04:24.580
I would actually probably refer to fuck a less attractive chick in most times because I know they put in the work.
01:04:31.980
Because those super hot chicks, like I feel like they're usually the most boring.
01:04:45.900
Jose's about to go to his wife as, I'm glad you're so, you're just, you're like a six.
01:04:52.360
Honestly, if you were an eight, babe, I don't know if I'd be with you.
01:05:00.340
But like, yeah, I mean, I can be objective and you're giving my other, like, would I fuck?
01:05:19.060
I don't, I, well, I feel like glow isn't, like, that's not like a, that's like only a slur because it's 4chan.
01:05:23.880
Like, it's not like a direct, it's just for feds.
01:05:25.760
It's just a slang for feds, which isn't really a.
01:05:30.600
I'm not just saying, though, but like, it came from just like a slang for a fed.
01:05:39.300
She-mail actually legitimately makes transgender people mad.
01:05:44.980
But yet they tag themselves on their own porn for that, so I don't understand.
01:05:48.520
I'm going to be so mad at y'all if we fucking push on she-mail.
01:05:58.960
Could you replace glow nigger with another slur for a fed?
01:06:07.260
It might be the, yeah, it's just like, slur for, it's, I don't know, because like, they
01:06:12.520
Like, but if you call a she-mail that, they'll lose their mind.
01:06:19.060
And I wouldn't use the porn category, because those are already so degenerate anyways.
01:06:25.020
I mean, if you're a transgender and they get into porn, I mean, at that point, I mean,
01:06:45.680
You would have, Eric would have helped you out, Jose.
01:06:51.900
Yeah, you know, I don't care what he had to say anymore.
01:06:58.400
You're like, why is this guy hassling me about this vote that doesn't matter?
01:07:01.780
Hey, by the way, would you say that your hot versus ugly chick fucking hypothesis works
01:07:12.220
I have a list, and I feel like I said it better.
01:07:13.720
But you think it works with men, so that ugly men fuck better than hot men?
01:07:29.880
And also because usually, usually on the hot to ugly scale for guys, like, ugly means
01:07:35.580
usually they are fat and or, like, usually, I mean, usually, like, the uglier guys are
01:07:43.760
I mean, just being fit in itself helps out in sex in so many ways, so.
01:07:53.720
You're doing, like, fucking, like, American Psycho type shit, you know?
01:08:00.260
Oh, you know how the steamer is, like, fucking.
01:08:11.620
Not the one that was for the Victoria's Secret model.
01:08:17.200
Honestly, Jose, if you want to bring it up, that shit is so fucking funny.
01:08:24.660
But it's definitely not something to just talk about.
01:08:28.500
It's funnier that this guy did multiple tweets about the same, you know, retarded chick.
01:08:32.700
So it was, like, it was that aspect that's funny.
01:08:35.160
Because I would have looked at his profile and there were other ones of the same chick.
01:08:38.040
But what it was is this guy was just posting Down Syndrome, like, just chicks.
01:08:42.080
And, like, one head, like, was just kind of curvy.
01:08:45.520
And it was just, I mean, like, posting about how he's going to smash, like, fuck this down.
01:08:57.140
Yeah, you can share your screen and pull it up.
01:08:58.860
So the guy who commented under it, he's like, my niece is Down Syndrome.
01:09:02.940
And they were like, do you know how the internet works?
01:09:05.300
So I think this is the Down Swimsuit Edition person?
01:09:28.860
Hey, Elizabeth says that fucking a down person is pretty great because I do pretty good.
01:09:41.960
Hey, I partly am getting more fit because she did ask if I wanted to lose weight during sex.
01:09:52.220
Did she give you shit that when she's, like, blown you?
01:09:57.760
I remember there was one time I got pretty fat.
01:10:01.400
Because this is weird when you're, like, tummy's touching me while I'm sucking your neck.
01:10:14.500
She's like, I'd touch your balls, but your ass is so big it's, like, pushing out.
01:10:30.540
Tyler, were you going to bring him up or were you just talking with us?
01:10:32.460
I Googled retarded swimsuit edition, and that's when it came up, literally.
01:10:42.160
But, yeah, Adam, if you haven't heard it before, my wife, literally, it was mid-stroke.
01:11:08.400
When she wraps her arms around you, she's like, ew.
01:11:29.740
That was a long time ago and it did take me a long.
01:11:36.560
So it was like, that was almost a year ago probably.
01:11:50.700
And to me, when I hear Sugarfoot, I can only – in my head, it immediately pops up a fat black woman too.
01:11:59.140
Because they're the ones that call you sugar and I don't know why I just – in my head, just Sugarfoot went right to a fat black lady.
01:12:19.140
Like you drop that and you fucking stupid Hole.
01:12:22.540
Yeah, that's like – it's like – yeah, that wins 10 times out of 10.
01:12:27.580
Yeah, Hole is just cum dumpster but just like multiplied.
01:12:32.080
I mean, it's just like cum dumpster on steroids.
01:12:35.120
Like Jose said, it's like the Tsar Bomb, whatever the fuck they drop.
01:12:38.880
Because Hole – I mean, cum dumpster makes you think that they actually get like dick.
01:12:44.240
Like Hole doesn't mean they – they might not even get dick.
01:12:48.440
But again, like their only thing they have is their Hole.
01:12:52.140
Yeah, you're like you're so vapid as a human, not even as a lady.
01:13:04.520
Sugarfoot got in a hard one here because it is going up against basically –
01:13:10.880
Yeah, Sugarfoot could be other ones because we didn't have any other fat people.
01:13:24.680
Yeah, I would have shit on both of them against that 100%.
01:13:27.600
I was going to get a gas with more sensitive sensibilities so that way we can like –
01:13:32.340
Like, all right, now tell me what you think about these two slurs.
01:13:35.860
Now, Hole also, I feel like is – I haven't heard as much since Jose brought it up.
01:13:54.380
But he was the one that brought it up for me whenever the whole fucking Pete thing was going on.
01:13:58.440
I had never heard of just calling a girl a hole before.
01:14:04.540
Oh, dude, the old Opie and Anthony years, brother.
01:14:05.560
I don't know where I heard it, but I know it was an original thing.
01:14:08.840
It was something I pulled from deep back in there.
01:14:11.100
Couldn't tell you where, but I knew it wasn't an original thing.
01:14:15.980
When they used to do all the Jocktober stuff back in the day.
01:14:18.740
And it would be like that one lady on the morning show being like,
01:14:27.900
That's where that's probably – you guys are thinking of it from.
01:14:37.320
Junkie Jeff said the hole doesn't do it for me.
01:14:39.680
Really, it sounds like you're too late to call someone an asshole.
01:14:45.560
This is specifically for just women that don't have anything else to give except their hole.
01:14:56.720
You said also in Ireland getting laid is called getting your hole.
01:15:03.900
I guess it's less offensive in Ireland then since it's more normal.
01:15:10.240
I mean, I'm sure if you type into the search bar, you might be able to find some podcasts.
01:15:19.220
I think if you call a girl, a woman, a hole in real life as a person to – a fat person
01:15:23.320
of Sugarfoot, I think they would get much more upset at a hole than Sugarfoot would.
01:15:31.460
Because I feel like earlier you were like, oh, all about Sugarfoot.
01:15:34.920
I think it was – I think it was badly placed in here.
01:15:40.860
But Sugarfoot could have gone further if it got a better matchup for sure.
01:15:44.100
Because it's such a funny thing to be like – because it's, you know, attacking fat
01:15:50.460
You know, it's – I mean, I think there's a lot of things with it.
01:15:56.420
It's like an up-and-coming team that you know is actually pretty good, but they're not like
01:16:00.580
And you're like, oh, they can make it far in this playoff.
01:16:02.640
And then just get like the number one fucking like opponent like right off the bat and get
01:16:08.040
Sugarfoot is like too subtle of an insult for fat people.
01:16:14.100
Lard ass is pretty good or just fat ass in general.
01:16:35.580
I once told a fat guy, I said, what are you going to do, eat me?
01:16:43.200
A hole is – you go camping, you dig a hole, you take a shit in it.
01:16:48.580
And if you call a woman a hole, you are basically – it's the ultimate.
01:16:54.880
I feel like shit hole should have been on here just because of Trump and just the thought
01:16:59.060
of that – we're – shit hole is a slur for a terrible country, any country outside
01:17:06.780
Yeah, but Trump really made it snap when he said shit hole country.
01:17:12.760
I mean, and then they made it seem like he was racist, and so now it's a slur, a racist
01:17:26.620
There's not really any need to elaborate on this one, so –
01:17:36.680
You don't – by the way, you don't understand how upset he was.
01:17:42.380
He literally was – he was trying to move it to Thursday like we were some fucking
01:17:48.200
Our whole like – the blueprint of the show when we started was like, hey, we're all
01:17:52.980
guys who have other shows or a lot of other stuff going on in life.
01:17:55.820
Very busy, so we could have a large cast that we can pull from and just kind of throw
01:18:02.500
And Toad is just like, no, I will make everyone.
01:18:08.940
And, you know, it's like I'm to vote to the show.
01:18:10.340
I'm like, I don't know what you're trying to prove, but okay.
01:18:12.480
He literally thought at the end of the year we were going to give him a perfect attendance
01:18:27.580
I don't feel like he would have gone sugar foot, but, you know, whatever.
01:18:31.660
Well, his attendance record is better than his joke record.
01:18:40.520
The quality of his jokes, though, I feel makes it even better when he does get a zinger.
01:18:47.860
Hey, Elizabeth, your comment does not make him look better.
01:19:04.760
So for the Hateful Eight, now we're going to have what will be Hole versus –
01:19:12.980
So I think we know that's going to blow it out of the water again, but whatever.
01:20:00.420
Shemale and Pan-Faced Gook are both things that happen in Vietnam.
01:20:09.700
Then we have Moon Cricket versus Street Shooter.
01:20:18.260
But the right side is like one that is going to be like clearly make it through.
01:20:28.460
He opens for me on the road and stuff like that.
01:20:35.380
And we're outside of a club and we're doing comedy and fucking – it's like four black comics.
01:20:43.420
And out of nowhere, he's like, fucking Moon Cricket.
01:20:49.200
You got to go right now or you're going to get the chicken.
01:20:55.180
And anyway, we're not allowed back there anymore.
01:21:24.140
So how do you know that phrase and not know – because I didn't know that phrase,
01:21:29.140
He said he just heard it from like a relative of his, but you should have gave it all the –
01:21:38.260
I once – I was working with this black guy, and I kept saying boy.
01:21:43.100
And evidently that's not – I didn't know that what you were supposed to say.
01:21:49.580
You could call a black guy boy and see what he does to you.
01:22:07.440
I learned some interesting anti-Semitic history that a lot of people use this phrase today,
01:22:16.540
It's beyond the pale comes from czarist Russia when they outlawed Jewish people from moving to certain areas of the country.
01:22:27.820
It was the settlement pact or the – they would be moving beyond the pale of where they're allowed to go.
01:22:34.140
So if you say beyond the pale, it's anti-Semitic.
01:22:38.000
I'm going to start using beyond the pale a lot.
01:22:42.480
If you're like, oh, we're keeping them motherfuckers early.
01:22:44.720
I feel like beyond the pale is something that's like so bad.
01:22:55.520
It's been normalized though because it's used in popular culture, yeah.
01:23:22.980
Is the outside – like the outside of the venue or outside of like the comic strip that went into the comics –
01:23:29.540
I feel like that would be – whenever the comics go outside to take a smoke, I feel like that would be the funniest thing to be.
01:23:33.980
Oh, it's always the most fun depending on who you're hanging with.
01:23:36.540
If you're hanging with some fucking nerds, then no.
01:23:41.020
Like we run a monthly show by my house and the green room we have there, it gets pretty wild.
01:23:49.400
Especially when your buddy is calling everyone moon crickets.
01:23:53.920
So is it more or less fun when – what's that guy's name?
01:24:02.920
When you go outside to take a smoke and Mike Figs is already out there, do you walk back inside or do you –
01:24:11.040
First off, Tyler, do you think you're funnier than Figs?
01:24:19.840
I don't – this is the first I've ever heard of Figs.
01:24:26.900
I would – well, I would – I know I'd be better on Legion of Skanks than he would be.
01:24:38.880
You know what the funny thing about this question, though, is it's – it only sounds bad, but it really – if you think about it, it's like you should – like, unless you have, like, no sense of ego at all, you should think you're funnier than him.
01:24:51.140
They talked about this because they did the lie detector with those – fuck, who are those guys?
01:24:57.200
And they asked if they were funnier than one of his friends.
01:25:04.620
But – and, yeah, and they were – and they discussed where it's – as a comic, you should always be, like, I'm funnier than anybody.
01:25:18.140
Like, you kind of have an idea of who you're better than.
01:25:19.880
Like, I would never be, like, I'm funnier than Jay.
01:26:16.480
Send one of your wives or something after him because he seems to be quite the man-whore.
01:26:23.660
Dude's egg-crushing just all sorts of box all the time.
01:26:36.480
I would put, like, my entire reputation on the fact that I'm funnier than Figs by just about every metric.
01:26:48.780
Yeah, you guys are definitely funnier on podcasts.
01:26:57.840
Not in, like, you know, what applies to the vast majority of the rest of your life, you know, being conversationally.
01:27:33.120
Any woman that goes on Legion of Skanks is less funny than Mike Figs.
01:27:36.700
So, that's – even when – because who was it that came on recently?
01:27:52.640
Well, she's better than usually she is on podcasts because usually she just takes over.
01:27:59.020
I'm going to go out on a limb here and say P-Nord is funnier.
01:28:03.200
That actually is the point where I invented this.
01:28:08.900
Hey, Andy, what does it say on that truck behind your Confederate flag?
01:28:17.700
Is that just a fortuitous thing in the background or was that staged?
01:28:23.740
I just ripped the first picture with – it's going to kill me.
01:28:32.520
I don't know if you can bring out the signal chat on here, Cole, but yeah, or just go to Twitter.
01:28:38.440
Yeah, they commented on one of Crenshaw's things, and it was pretty hard.
01:28:42.360
I feel like they may have completely just like kicked over the pot again.
01:28:50.940
It was a picture of McCain with horns along with Liz Cheney or someone else.
01:28:57.760
No, Madeline Albright in horns, and they're saying something like they're going to share
01:29:05.620
Right above it, they had the casket picture too.
01:29:07.900
You know how Dan Crenshaw got trolled by Alex Stein recently?
01:29:12.520
But he – you know, fucking he made someone bitching about like – you know, some tweet
01:29:18.900
But it says below it, LP and H puts, we are looking forward to one day tweeting about
01:29:22.840
Dan Crenshaw the way we will continue to tweet about John McCain with the picture.
01:29:33.300
I love it, though, because it's just dropping your dick on the table.
01:29:35.760
Not to ruin the mood here, but I thought of something last night when Dave's talking,
01:29:40.340
and it reminded me, you know, he wants to curb or cull the –
01:29:44.360
No, he wants to cull the attention of like media, right?
01:29:50.220
So we want to be nice to Lydia because it gets us and da-da-da-da.
01:29:53.580
Well, it reminded me of what we used to say about John McCain, which was he sluts for – or he
01:29:59.200
whores himself out to the media so that they like him.
01:30:05.020
So I have a feeling that we're going to be nice to Lydia.
01:30:11.200
Because eventually I just see them as shitting on the libertarian movement in the first – at the end.
01:30:17.840
So I don't know that it's going to be – it's a little different, but –
01:30:20.120
I'm not even making the case that he should be – no, I don't think anyone's saying that Dave should be shitty to any of them.
01:30:26.120
But, yeah, I mean if you say some dumb shit, are you really expecting our people not to jump on people saying dumb shit,
01:30:31.940
especially some like boring, you know, centrist?
01:30:37.140
I think he's smart, like, you know, going on their show and stuff like that.
01:30:39.940
I'm not saying he needs to be a dick to him at all.
01:30:41.620
I do think he should – because we talked on the show, I was like – and I had told him that I had said before,
01:30:46.080
and I think there's a possibility he could have, like, you know, his own version of, like, a Ron Paul moment.
01:30:51.560
Because – and he wouldn't even have to be shitty.
01:30:53.600
It was just the – because I assumed they were going to talk about the LPNH stuff.
01:30:56.800
And I figured there's a way he could frame that in order to be like – really speak truth and be like, fuck these people.
01:31:02.040
I mean he still can be like, I don't know, that's not my really favorite messaging or whatever.
01:31:07.620
You know, they're like – they're not anyone to be glorified.
01:31:09.740
He could have totally delivered in a way that they would have been like a mic drop moment.
01:31:12.820
And, you know, like they'd probably been like, how dare you?
01:31:23.560
So why don't we have our – and I was thinking about this.
01:31:25.920
So we need to get a libertarian podcast or something like that as big as Tim Pool.
01:31:44.040
You could do daily news rundowns like with libertarian guests who are actually libertarians, and that would be cool.
01:31:50.680
And I would rather tune into that to hear Tim Pool, milquetoast, China Hawk takes.
01:32:04.560
I think there is something to it being live as well.
01:32:13.400
Josh could be – I mean he would have to fly people out there.
01:32:44.420
I'm going to say, bless his heart is what he's trying to say.
01:32:47.100
That's what they used to say about retards back in the 40s.
01:32:49.860
Still being being mean to him, but sometimes he just says some shit like, whoa, what's going on in there?
01:33:04.320
But Ian's also okay with, like, thinking about, like, not being a fucking – he's also very much against, like, more of a pacifist and more against just war in general.
01:33:14.440
He just thinks it's kind of, like, his fucking weird weed brain just doesn't like it in that way.
01:33:18.800
I really think he's the kind of guy that can be convinced of just about anything if you talk to him long enough.
01:33:22.480
Yeah, you can put a gun in his hand and tell him to shoot somebody.
01:33:34.140
Adam, are you always going to stay a private account on Twitter now?
01:33:41.380
Well, I mean, I blocked everyone I could imagine.
01:33:50.260
And then, oh, he went on a fucking tirade, though, behind the scenes.
01:33:53.940
First of all, he tried to get me kicked out of the party for the nap, violating the nap.
01:34:06.320
I told people to go on Google Reviews and shit on his business.
01:34:16.460
I say it all the time, but I hope your heart stops.
01:34:26.040
I mean, if you guys want to go shit on it, go shit on it.
01:34:36.700
Yeah, but he went, like, he, like, he, like, called, like, the fucking JC, like, the fucking
01:34:42.300
Like, you guys are going to, like, we don't care.
01:34:47.700
Tyler's first thing he says to anybody that becomes his client, shut the fuck up.
01:34:54.820
It's crazy how many people get in trouble because they just don't shut the fuck up.
01:34:58.240
Like, immediately, when they get in trouble, just.
01:35:00.860
He's also actively a member of the Keystone Party.
01:35:07.280
Oh, the Keystone Party is all the low birds and faggots who lost.
01:35:10.840
And they were just, you know, they're really, you know, the progressives in Chief's clothing.
01:35:13.980
They formed their own party, the Keystone Party.
01:35:24.580
I have a hard enough time taking the LP seriously.
01:35:26.880
I cannot, like, I struggle to take an offshoot of, like.
01:35:30.840
No, it's a bunch of real losers who think they.
01:35:58.280
But it was going to be, and I sent this in our Tower Gang chat for our show.
01:36:03.800
I said, the thought of just me and one other, either Jose and Clint may have almost came on.
01:36:11.100
The thought of just two or three guys on the stream, that kind of gets my dick hard.
01:36:16.100
It was just me and Jose just talking back and forth.
01:36:19.040
I think it could have been good, but then you'll come in.
01:36:31.020
Yeah, it said Jose can only take LPNH seriously.
01:36:33.340
No, I genuinely, my thing is, like, if every account was, like, LPNH and the National, I'd be like, all right.
01:36:43.140
But, you know, I don't think that's sustainable.
01:36:51.280
But, anyways, you guys want to start dropping plugs?
01:36:57.040
Tyler, follow me on the Libertarian Podcast Review.
01:37:03.880
So, Nick's going to come on in the next few weeks.
01:37:09.960
It's even more funny, folks, on ours with my lovely co-host, Garbage Mane.
01:37:22.220
If you're not following me, then don't follow me.
01:37:50.400
I might use some of you guys as a guest co-host.
01:37:53.740
After that big Mike Figgs show, I mean, I might get some good viewers.
01:38:00.940
We will work our beefs up until we get to Legion of Kings.
01:38:07.700
Anytime on any sort of comedic platform, I'm going to throw in some sort of Mike Figgs
01:38:13.440
Who's this guy going in all these different platforms?
01:38:14.800
It would be funny if you come on right after Mike Figgs and his shit on him.
01:38:21.620
I think if we endear ourselves to Shannon, that would also be really great because she
01:38:25.120
produces – well, she produces Yo and Mei raps, doesn't she?
01:38:31.160
I actually don't really – I don't watch that.
01:38:34.600
But she does rap and she has her own podcast on there.
01:38:56.480
Honestly, Jose, he couldn't be worse than Lou Perez.
01:38:59.620
Dude, Lou's actually funny too, like stand-up wise.
01:39:02.620
He's another example of someone that's like – he's good in like skits and like prepared
01:39:07.640
He also was – I feel like he was not prepared for what we were going to talk.
01:39:10.880
Yeah, he was like, holy shit, this guy just said nigger.
01:39:26.800
I would love that one just so they could battle.
01:39:29.900
Do you remember the – Cole, do you remember the last episode Figgs was on Legion of Skanks?
01:39:33.960
Where like he was – like dude, I swear I ended up watching the video version later
01:39:38.680
just because I was like I want to see how these guys are reacting because it was so bad.
01:39:42.380
And you could – just listening to the audio, I could tell the tension.
01:39:45.420
And then I went and watched the video and like you could see all their body language.
01:39:50.540
I feel like Louis likes him and Dave and Jay are just like, why the fuck do you keep bringing this guy?
01:40:05.060
This goes for any like bad – like anybody that has a bad week on skanks.
01:40:20.620
Skanks fans and like Raph – like that whole fan base is rabid.
01:40:23.840
And you got a good – and you got a good – on Raph, you got a –
01:40:26.980
What if you had a chance to go on Legion – if any of you had a chance to go on Legion of Skanks,
01:40:37.880
These guys are actually funny and I'm just funny in my face.
01:40:41.560
I guess I got him on, so I should be all right.
01:40:45.960
I met Jay once, but I don't know him like at all.
01:40:55.080
You should definitely get Louis on your podcast and then just never invite Dave on again and just be like –
01:41:00.680
And then just shit on Dave the entire – and just be like, Louis, I'm so glad you came.
01:41:04.880
You're the best – you're the best podcast guest I could ever ask for.
01:41:10.000
I feel bad somewhat being so mean to figs, but at the same time, it also deeply irritates me.
01:41:17.320
You're like, how can you be so bad at this but get so many opportunities and still fuck up every golden opportunity?
01:41:26.100
Now you understand why we bring P-Nord back all the time.
01:41:32.920
I mean, but his was, I mean, warranted as well.
01:41:38.700
The whole – the whole – like you just got to know when to talk.
01:41:42.500
It's like don't just try to make a joke to make a joke.
01:41:46.840
Like you have Jay who's one of the funniest motherfuckers on the planet who's so quick.
01:41:54.020
So it's like you can't just be there and just be like, oh, word salad, bullshit.
01:41:59.000
He would do impressions like the over-the-top cartoonish ones that went on for way too long.
01:42:09.940
No, like all the fans really hated Jamie Kilstein whenever he was –
01:42:13.140
he was the one that – he was a comic that then went like super lefty